England won't get relegated from the World Cup - anticipate two years of The Big Sam delivering the international module here

FFS.

Hold on, is it a done deal?

http://kingofwallpapers.com/champagne/champagne-005.jpg

http://www.whoateallthepies.tv/wp-content/uploads/2010/11/9773830.jpg
he's ready

O_0

if this comes to fruition im going to be chuffed to bits

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/content/dam/football/2016/07/13/allardycechest-large_trans++Lf6XVudQ0d-fF3pHUPFzEM3DtJLtL4e-o45IQf0cqG8.jpg

https://twitter.com/Matt_Chappp/status/736869374221553664

i have no qualms in saying that Big Sam will be easily the best England manager since Venables by almost any metric you choose

he won't be shoe-horning wazza into midfield that's for sure

:D

venables himself set a p low bar so that's p funny in of itself. win 2 games in a tournament you host one of which is against scotland ffs.

https://www.thesun.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/2016/07/nintchdbpict000251825279.jpg

If Steve Bruce aced his interview this is going to be embarrassing.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v472/birdnestsoup/stadsam.jpg

Jonathan Meades's long lost brother

5 Live running a brilliant show at the moment wherein the usual ex-pro suspects big up Sam's tactual acuity and bulldog spirit and a succession of fans of ex-Allardyce clubs phone in and moan about how shit he is

why did he stop wearing that watch?

*Sam Allardyce**

The new England Manager was born in Dudley and grew up on the Greens near the Wrens Nest estate.

He also played a couple of times for Dudley Town FC.

When asked if he is a brummie he tells people "I am a Black Country lad" he stated that "Whenever people ask me whether I’m from Birmingham I always correct them and tell them I’m from Dudley"

Well done Big Sam

Like and share.

https://scontent-lhr3-1.xx.fbcdn.net/t31.0-8/13724052_1148538525189823_3708786218745225672_o.jpg

@richardajkeys
Big Sam is the man then! Excellent. Now we can get our game back - re-discover our English DNA. Be English - not whatever is fashionable.

ein reich, ein volk, ein groß Sam

A Real Brexit Manager

Really looking forward to Ricardo Vaz Te and Mohamed Diame suddenly discovering an English grandmother.

funny, my memory of england's performance at the euros was that it was extremely english and not at all fashionable

http://e0.365dm.com/16/07/16-9/20/stuart-pearce-england_3751275.jpg

lol which satirical site?

Sam Allardyce 'concerned' by Joe Hart situation

Remembering all those times a peturbed tony soprano beats on the barman

No way SNA: Sam Allardyce does not rule out England return for John Terry https://t.co/w4LaTEpYvL By @JamieJackson___ https://t.co/BG5TadjpHD

"I don’t know what the political side might mean, if there is a political"

http://emojipedia-us.s3.amazonaws.com/cache/db/d5/dbd57bcbb3fff7245025a39061012200.png

god ebjt comeback would be delicious

getting myself into an allardycean mindset i can't help but think that terry's legs may not be what they used to be, but his reading of the game can compensate for that, he also has the heart of a lion. reckon he can still do a job

Goalkeepers: Fraser Forster (Southampton), Joe Hart (Manchester City), Tom Heaton (Burnley).

Defenders: Gary Cahill (Chelsea), Nathaniel Clyne (Liverpool), Phil Jagielka (Everton), Danny Rose (Tottenham Hotspur), Luke Shaw (Manchester United), Chris Smalling (Manchester United), John Stones (Manchester City), Kyle Walker (Tottenham Hotspur).

Midfielders: Dele Alli (Tottenham Hotspur), Michail Antonio (West Ham United), Eric Dier (Tottenham Hotspur), Danny Drinkwater (Leicester City), Jordan Henderson (Liverpool), Adam Lallana (Liverpool), Wayne Rooney (Manchester United), Raheem Sterling (Manchester City), Theo Walcott (Arsenal).

Strikers: Harry Kane (Tottenham Hotspur), Daniel Sturridge (Liverpool), Jamie Vardy (Leicester City).

recall watching antonio at the valley, playing on the left. "don't let him cut inside, he's only got one trick."

tbfttl he did score using that trick, but international defenders ought to have a lot of fun marking him. he's mostly a set-piece threat at top level

Never learn, never change

i'm still gutted he wasnt able to pick steven nzonzi over mark noble, would have been the best ever

"We did have a call, it would have been of interest to me and we did explore it. He’s very good and never got the credit he deserves because of his size.

'Being too big can be a hindrance to a footballer because they think their feet are not as clever and they’re not as mobile or sharp.

‘But [playing for England] was impossible. The issue is dead now.’

The 'too big', a mythical category always considered folklore by experts on the subject until today's events

Allardyce inquiring about the availability of Steven Nzonzi is everything I wanted from this era and more.

Captain Hendo

Big Sam will hand Dier what he considers to be his team’s most pivotal role – as the holding midfielder in front of the back four.

Sam makes no secret of his belief that Dier was born to the job he is giving him. He said: “What a player, eh? Like a Campo or a Hierro. He’s got that vibe.”

eric's got it... jordan's got it.... little cute aaliyah's got it

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/sport/football/article-3764178/Sam-Allardyce-wants-players-bit-fun-new-England-boss-invites-comedians-training-camp.html

perfect

https://vine.co/v/5ePDJHrAvvg

Small details make a big difference, according to Allardyce. Little things like rebranding around St George’s Park with graphics - including slogans like The Journey Begins Here in the main foyer- and the Three Lions crest on the lifts in the hotel in the Burton HQ.

Allardyce was chatting in the Ron Greenwood Room just after giving a press conference to name his first squad. “The Ron Greenwood Room? All the names here inspire me. I am staying in the Sir Bobby Charlton Suite,” said Allardyce.

“Do you think there might be a Sam Allardyce Suite here one day? I hope so. You never know do you? I suppose it depends on how well I do over the next two years."

"I didn’t call [Barkley and Wilshere], no. I think that I have always been the type of manager who has made the selections.

"You then think about how much time do you spend on the phone? Will he answer the phone, should I leave a message, should I WhatsApp them?"

I love that he actually asked himself whether he thought there might one day be a suite named after him, then answered with modest uncertainty.

So far it's looking like this is going to be every bit as funny as expected.

“Then we’ve got the Club England, which is the business end of what we do before we get to training, then we go down to the facility, two identities where they are can chill out, relax amongst themselves, play table tennis, pool.

Think Sam has a future in the leisure industry.

I don't even care about the results, I just hope he never gets fired from this job.

^^^

he's always been a Sports Science Bro at heart

is it really such a big deal that there's fucking table tennis and a pool in the new big sam modular relaxation unit? didn't they always stay in a fucking hotel? you'd have to assume the fa have tended to break the booking.com bank out for a hotel with at least a small swimming pool?

I don't even care about the results, I just hope he never gets fired from this job.

There really is such an air of Cameron-pig-day-revelation joy to the whole thing. I hope he's manager forever.

i kind of like him. i mean he's obv a bellend but i guess i'm 51 to 49 in favour of him doing really well, if he doesn't do really well i guess i'd like to see him do horrendously badly. i don't want him to go gently into that good night either way.

No fear of that given the job

id love to see big sam do tremendously well as England manager, basically anything shy of a championship

https://www.theguardian.com/football/blog/2016/aug/31/sam-allardyce-england-fa-nuclear-disarmament#img-1

whoops that was just meant to be the image..haven't read the article yet

why would england not pick an england-qualified player for their team based on... his not being english is it? the colour of his skin? feels incredibly post-brexit. don't recall people talking this way when januzaj was supposed to be good.

There was some difference in views on whether Arteta should have been picked for (or rather offered a place with) England a few years ago IIRC, but it seems like a non-issue to me (ie you should pick the best available team, obv).

i am against over-18 residency qualification, it is my Uncool Conservative Belief sorry

just international football wise i mean

tbh i do like how it's just part of sam firmly having his bolton wanderers hat back on though. if he can find mario jardel's english great great nan then i'm on board

never too late to call up manuel almunia as i recall was on the cards for a while

Alex McCarthy replaces Fraser Forster in England squad

members-only club england at its finest

wait

the one who played at the valley the other day for southampton u23s and who didn't save a penalty in the shootout

A whole 10 league appearances in the last two seasons, England's future is in safe hands.

"Winning is what we want. If the nation thinks that's the only thing we can have to make us feel better, we'll try. But personally, if we get a draw from the most difficult game of the group, I'll be happy."

expectation management at its finest

30 minutes into Big Sams first match and England have not had a shot. Beautiful.

lovely bit of skill from Danny Rose for Slovakia's first goal

lol. he is having a Torrid Time

Ian Wright's whiny voice, surely one of the most offensive things in football.

Five minutes of discussion about Wayne Rooney playing in the wrong area of the pitch and getting in everyone's way. A reassuring constant in an uncertain world.

Could conceivably have been sent off at least three times.

Skrtel, obvs.

lovely bit of skill from Skrtel for England's first goal shot on target

Slovakia instantly look 20% more up for it

Jammy fuckin' bastards.

The good times are back.

lucky cunts, no improvement on any of their Euro games

Archetypal England World Cup Qualifying Stages performance/victory - they usually are victories after all.

gotta love a ref who waits for Skrtel to club Kane to death before meekly issuing a second yellow then sticks a load of Fergie time on. chip on both shoulders

where is rooney's position

"today e was were e wanted to be. cos e were brilliant"

sam's got the first big hurdle out of the way. gabriel clarke didnt fancy a straightener outside

Can someone explain to me how club managers all think rooney as CM is ok when literally the whole world knows better? I'm not talking a situation where something is a risk or a trial either, plenty of managers have tried it and we've all seen it be dumb each time. And yet?

obviously does wonders off the ball

There are dark forces at work. I can't really say more

oh my god his 33rd birthday is drawing closer

the notice of resignation in 2018, it all fits

Everything Allardyce said post-match suggested Rooney will be retained regardless of form. It had begun with a television interview in the bowels of the stadium. “Wayne played wherever he wanted,” said the manager. “He was brilliant and controlled midfield. I can’t stop Wayne playing there.”

That demanded further clarity upstairs. “This is the most decorated outfield player in England. He’s won everything at Manchester United, at Champions League and domestic level. I think he holds a lot more experience at international football than I do as an international manager. So, when he is using his experience and playing as a team member, it’s not for me to say where he’s going to play.

Wayne Rooney strives for impact but Adam Lallana looks like England’s creator
Read more
“It’s up to me to ask whether he’s doing well in that position, of course, and contributing. If so, great. We’d like to get him into goalscoring positions more. He’s been a goalscorer all his life and I want him to do that again, but he reads a game as he reads it. He read it very well, we won and dominated. I must admit, he did play a little deeper than I thought he’d play. But I was pleased with his performance.” As a glimpse of what awaits, that was intriguing. Allardyce had bemoaned the slow nature of England’s build-up play, and yet Rooney’s passing can actually be identified as slowing this team down.

You cant

I mean look

Look

......

Just....you can't ....

Can you?

Those comments have actually been kind of haunting me. What an utterly insane thing to say

yeah it is kind of disconcerting. the whole thing is taking on an odd feeling, like rooney is some idiot king in the land of the blind, outwitting smarter men with impermeable stupidity.

Personally I'm loving all this, the more the merrier tbh.

There's a conspiracy theory among a certain section of the Utd fan base that Rooney's contract actually guarantees him a starting place. I used to think it was a bit silly, but I've now realised it goes deeper than even they suspected

the call of cthulroo

could at least have taken cahill off so twp stones dier werent all deluding themselves in the same place

Casting the Roons (xp)

A Game of Th'Roons

Rashford just scored a hat-trick on his u-21 debut

Just semi-watched it, standard indictment of FA conservatism

https://streamable.com/y9is

flames. pen mightier than the golazo

should just play all the jamaican lads and leave be. rashford sturridge sterling stones

that was his first ever penalty

(second goal actually got a deflection)

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/2016/09/26/exclusive-sam-allardyce-mocked-predecessor-roy-hodgson---and-hit/

ten month investigation for that...

“So I’d have come in at half time and gone, right: bang bang bang bang bang. And then if that didn’t work I’d have gone bang, substitute, substitute, know what I mean, and

During the meeting he remarked that Sir Alex Ferguson gets “four hundred, five hundred grand a pop” for speaking engagements, while Robbie Williams got “£1.6 million for a wedding. Just singing”.

The England manager insisted he would deliver “value for money” in helping to attract investors, boasting of his popularity in the Orient.

“It’s not only the England manager,” he said, “it’s the beauty of being a Premier League manager all them years like me… I have more pictures taken over there than I have here.”

“Keynote speaking, that’s what I’d be doing, keynote speaking. I’m a keynote speaker.

“Just know, it’s just delivering, for you, it’s just delivering value for money… they’ve got to enjoy the time they’ve had, enjoy the conversation. Not just the keynote speech but also in the bar after.

“I don’t come in like a lot of them, come in, right bang, you’re off. Do you know what I mean? That’s the end of that, done that, I’m off. I’m going to stand at the bar, have a few social drinks.”

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/content/dam/news/2016/09/26/109618352-sam-allardyce-news-xlarge_trans++-huom9Cr2mAIkjZYyr9DXPvMFsXiFIPFn2DW4kWaEs0.jpg

is he drinking a pint of wine?

“Players let him down in the end. I think maybe he, he was too indecisive. Cast a bit of an anxiety over to the players maybe. I mean prior to the Iceland game, he won all 10 qualifiers. We'd drawn with Russia, we should have won. We beat Wales, and that was our worst performance. We drew with Slovakia, and we only had to draw with Iceland to get through ... he just collapsed.”

xpost

i like how even when it comes to after-dinner speeches he still believes his delivery module is superior

"We all make mistakes, but the next man can’t make the same ones. And Kyle Walker made a bigger mistake than Wayne Rooney.”

“It was the youngest side in Europe. It was the youngest squad,” he said. “The average age was under 25. There are some stats out there that says that any team that wins a tournament has to be, has to have an average age of 27 or above.”

During a conversation about England’s upcoming matches, Allardyce said the national side were next due to play Malta and then “it’s Slovenia or something”.

dread to think what i'd come out with after a pint of wine tbfttl

did enjoy him wiping his full plausibly deniably guilty face with the napkin as he stated that bungs were off limits

"doing meet and greets and nothing else, so it’s not, nobody’s going to come back to me and say 'I met Sam and I invested in this, this portfolio, and he told me to go and buy these young players, and that young player’, and that’s, you know. So they can’t blame me, do you know what I mean?”

yeah for a private conversation after sinking a few pints of wine his comments on the team are fairly tame. the financial stuff might be hard to get away with tho.

you gotta hand it to the man, if he'd walked into the England set-up and played the same old bullshit line-up, like Rooney in midfield for example, he'd look an utter cunt

all for clowning on this sleazy fuck, but that isn't a pint of wine.

Andy van der meyde ‏@andyeye77 1h
I fucking told ya, dont make allerdyce coach of England! #udontfuckinglistening

times claiming he's a goner fwiw

(xp apologies lbi. missed the other thread)

nbd rtc

Shame this will be his downfall. Was actually looking forward to seeing Allardyce's England.

Was looking at a list of previous England managers. It's quite the spectacle. Hadn't realised you lot haven't had a decent manager since Robson tbf.

https://media.giphy.com/media/3o7qDMlVquZI1axqQ8/giphy.gif

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/2016/09/27/exclusive-sam-allardyce-claimed-hmrc-is-the-most-corrupt-busines/

what turning the screw looks like apparently

Raymond Verheijen ‏@raymondverheije 4m4 minutes ago
How did England manager Allardyce end up in this situation in first place? But Big Sam is just symptom of real problem of English football.

FULL HOUSE

bung periodisation is a must

Robson was a lucky manager, not a good one. Still maintain Venables could've been genuinely good.

https://twitter.com/NickMiller79/status/780773610378190848

seems he will go

Looks likely: http://www.telegraph.co.uk/football/2016/09/27/sam-allardyce-loses-job-as-england-manager-after-telegraph-inves/.

Gone.
Couldn't have scripted that any more comically.

100% WIN RECORD.

David Moyes must be a worried man, more worried than usual that is.

New thread title?

England might get relegated from the World Cup - reminisce on 67 days of The Big Sam delivering the international module here

http://vignette3.wikia.nocookie.net/simpsons/images/4/40/Picture0003.jpg/revision/latest?cb=20110623042517

Overall I think this is bollocks. Why are the papers setting up position untenable stings with so little substance behind them? He shot the shit in a private conversation to some people asking about how to do a corrupt thing.

yes, the funniest part of all of this is imagining what his bosses are going through.

xp

he got targeted because of his previous rep for venality tho didn't he?

yeah, I imagine the starting point for this investigation was "who are the dodgiest fucks we can think of in English football"

Overall I think this is bollocks. Why are the papers setting up position untenable stings with so little substance behind them? He shot the shit in a private conversation to some people asking about how to do a corrupt thing.

Rooney for manager obv

why would he accept a demotion

Dual role managing utd and england

http://ichef.bbci.co.uk/onesport/cps/800/cpsprodpb/F8D3/production/_91399636_lnp_allardyce_pma_01.jpg

not really gone for the save my bacon shirt there has he

Hope he's fiendishly tearing through Tinder

logging a chardonnay into untapped

"notes of bitterness, no, no, i'm allowing my feelings to taint the module."

gotta say, he is definitely a dick, and i agree that he was targeted based on past transgressions, but i still feel a lot of sympathy for him this evening.

his next job is gonna be some rage-filled shit. looking forward to a telegraph journalist asking him a question.

There will have been no serious appetite for the decision that was eventually taken unless it was unavoidable

would just like to point out that mold-green incorruptible Steve Bruce is available

steve bruce's failure will be just like watching, i dunno, people complain about suburban rail into london. watching sam's failure with the slight chance/hope/fear he might succeed was like this incredible story - this is the only boring way it could have ended.

Torygraph apparently all sorts of choice revelations about other Prem. managers up its sleeve.

Veni vidi allardici

He should not expect a great deal of sympathy but in the grand scheme of managerial scandals it is certainly a few notches down from the passage in Joey Barton’s newly released autobiography about the “creative accounting” of one manager (though not one, he says, he ever played under) whose “speciality was making late substitutions on the understanding his assistant would later collect a percentage of the player’s match fee”. That manager, according to Barton, was infamous for giving homegrown players their debuts, sometimes just for a few minutes, so the academy director would collect a bonus, to be split again. The manager would re-sign players he had worked with at other clubs and take a cut from them, too – paid monthly, and invariably in cash.

Who?

Redknapp surely

I suppose so. Does he qualify as "famous for giving homegrown players their debuts"?

I was thinking Keano. Or Moyesey god knows that poor man doesn't need anything else on his plate.

Mourinho

they described one of them as "long-serving" which basically reveals it. are we on shaky ground discussing this speculation here?

if the telegraph attempts an ilx sting this speculation will be the least of our worries surely

Fair

Who?

Yes, that one was glaringly obvious.

Bruce has got to be up to his neck in this shit, a low-level chequebook manager like him not makin shitloadz of scrilla on tha side seems unlikely.

bruce resigns in ghostwritten book trilogy scandal

lol!

a group of investigative journalists posing as a consortium of Tyneside businessmen arranged a £40 deal for a fourth instalment of the book, unbeknownst to the FA

only time i've ever felt a slither of sympathy for allardyce was when i discovered on 5live last night that he'd once tried to get the bbc to sack alan green.

Yeah but who among us hasn't at some point?

I look forward to the Telegraph dramatically revealing a PL club was almost certainly bought with the proceeds of heroin trafficking shortly.

obv happy that allardyce sacked, not that igaf about england just for the sheer amusement but these telegraph revelations are such weak sauce. a couple of agents ran their mouths about 8 PREMIER LEAGUE!!! managers shock horror but nothing approaching proof, not even enough 'evidence' to name them. the way they and the rest of the media talk you'd think it was end of times not something that will be forgotten about by the time the next int. break is over.

ok who had hughes, warnock, and redknapp down?

The Telegraph ‏@Telegraph 10m
Latest #football4sale allegations concern Jimmy Floyd Hasselbaink at QPR, Tommy Wright of Barnsley and Leeds' Massimo Cellino

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OH FUCK NO

someone put this into this plz

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/2016/09/28/exclusive-the-corruption-at-the-top-of-the-championship/

https://screenshotmachine.com/

fucking heart skipped a beat at that url :p

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/CteBgJTXgAAyDKY.jpg

aaaarrrrrrrghhhhhhhh

at a branch of Pret a Manger in west London, on August 25, Hasselbaink discussed terms as he sipped a cup of green tea

EXCLUSIVE CHINESE INCURSION INTO THE EFL

Meanwhile, Jimmy Floyd Hasselbaink, the manager of Queens Park Rangers, another Championship side, was filmed agreeing to represent the same firm by flying to the Far East to talk to investors for £55,000 a time.

He appeared open to the idea of signing players owned by the firm, despite the possibility of a conflict of interest. He told undercover reporters posing as representatives of the company: “Give me a ----ing player. A good player.”

could i read the article please

nm i got it

have the FA sacked Allardyce on the basis of evidence that they don't currently believe is sufficient to remove any other manager?

just checking

yes, but tbh i actually do agree that the national manager isn't any other manager

just mourning my lost prince

Rooney in midfield and Lingard on the wing bcos, as Southgate put it "He's in a good moment with his form". Paddy Power offering 75/1 on a nil-nil, may lump on a few quid just for lols

Southgate is such a gentleman he's clearly establishing his "unfit for the job" credentials nice and early

nah, Rashford will come on and rescue it xpost

Lingard is a strange one. His supporters praise his "movement", which tbf is probably superior to most of the statuesque fuckers Utd have up front, but he regularly goes through entire games without having any direct positive influence. And then every ten games or so he'll pop up with something like the Cup final or Charity Shield goal.

Managers seem to like him because he does as he's told and runs around a lot, and Southgate obviously knows him well from the u-21s

So it would appear that England are still shite but, worry not, for, according to Tyldesley, 'two or three' of the goals Scotland scored against Malta were 'fortuitous'.

wish i'd watched this now, sounds funny

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1txLJu5BBsA

^ benched

He should not expect a great deal of sympathy but in the grand scheme of managerial scandals it is certainly a few notches down from the passage in Joey Barton’s newly released autobiography about the “creative accounting” of one manager (though not one, he says, he ever played under) whose “speciality was making late substitutions on the understanding his assistant would later collect a percentage of the player’s match fee”. That manager, according to Barton, was infamous for giving homegrown players their debuts, sometimes just for a few minutes, so the academy director would collect a bonus, to be split again. The manager would re-sign players he had worked with at other clubs and take a cut from them, too – paid monthly, and invariably in cash.

― Bein' Sean Bean (LocalGarda), Wednesday, September 28, 2016 7:27 AM (one week ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Who?

― Bein' Sean Bean (LocalGarda), Wednesday, September 28, 2016 7:28 AM (one week ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Redknapp surely

― poor fiddy-less albion (darraghmac), Wednesday, September 28, 2016 7:52 AM (one week ago)

I've heard rumours of this type around Warnock for years.

when he was at Town he fell out with the chairman over some misunderstood verbal agreement for him to have his own club merchandise shop in the town centre .. the bloody shameless grifter!

jason puncheon was fined 15k for publicly accusing him of the re-signed player racket, but homegrown debuts doesnt really check out - given maybe like five in the last decade iirc

also worth asking yourself what % of every substitution you've ever seen in your life was purely of sporting motivation - clubs paying less if they come on after 60 mins etc

Wayne Rooney has a massive bench coat on as he sidles up alongside Jamie Vardy in the dugout. He's having a laugh and a joke. He'll be hoping to have an effect from there.

he's supposed to be sitting at one end of the bench but he's moved to the middle.

kyle walker just hit the worst cross of all time

Hang on dude I've seen Theo Walcott play

Walcott hasn't walker's consistency

cue frantic phone calls to Bruce this morning before he takes the Villa job

https://twitter.com/JohnSalako/status/798643534202974209

Worst tweet since Piers Morgan on the day OBL bought it.

merciful god

his deflected shot saved us from losing at home to non-league daggers when we were premier league tho so he's a bit forgiven

Remembrance Sunday. Thank you for paying the Ultimate sacrifice for us. God Save The Queen.

Gets bodied in stan collymore's autobiog iirc

collymore is CARD's press champion too, weirdly. the white knight to save us all