SOUTHAMPTON ARE STILL A BIG CLUB! The Premier League, 2014/15

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Wc_PyZRXFlg

So here we are, then.

If Liverpool win the Premiership this season then this is all your fault.

39th thread

Swygart deserves this for the gaffers thread tbrr

Lyall Thomas ‏@LyallThomas 1h
Info is that Sherwood is a major contender for Palace job and will speak to Parish. So will Mackay. #cpfc may well get to choose outright.

I do want to know who's ready

http://i.smimg.net/12/45/640x480_pearsonfall_20121110.jpg

HE'S READY

http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-ooImmrP0khw/UaIo_PjkqXI/AAAAAAAAACc/wXgNzv3HP7Q/s1600/sanchez-au-barca-une-image-bientot-revolue_101364.jpg

HE'S READY

http://i2.mirror.co.uk/incoming/article3940734.ece/alternates/s615/Ravel-Morrison.jpg

HE SHOULD PROBABLY GET READY

http://static2.demotix.com/sites/default/files/imagecache/a_scale_large/4500-6/photos/1398178101-burnley-fans-celebrate-winning-promotion-to-barclays-premier-league_4531736.jpg

THEY'RE READY

http://www.leicestermercury.co.uk/images/localworld/ugc-images/276308/Article/images/21078560/6094135-large.jpg
GTF IS READY (hold on he is turning, give him a week)

at this point I'm looking forward to the van gaal press conferences more than the actual football. but yeah, bring it on, it's been too long.

http://i.imgur.com/fJnwbB7.png

NONE OF US ARE READY

surely Pellegrini can read Garth's incisive deconstruction and use it to win the title now?

idk about this

Pel starting the mindgames b4 Mour, impressive

I've heard more words from Paul Scholes in the last 15 minutes than in his entire playing career.

Feels weird hearing people try to talk up 3-5-2 again.

Ashley Young gets bird shit in his mouth

remy starts

richard dunne in a back 3

looks like as good an opportunity as any to pick up the points so i'm fairly sure we'll get pwned by some functional competence

naughton kaboul dier rose with capoue bentaleb in front... dunno about that. and bobby soldiers benched

12 Vaz Te 16 Noble 24 Cole 04 Nolan 11 Downing

Substitutes: 10 Zárate 20 Demel 21 Diamé 22 Jääskeläinen 23 Poyet 31 E Valencia 32 Burke

lol what a cunt

v much fancy leicester to win today

Naughton off for handball, Wham miss resultant pen

gahh... functional competence just as predicted. rio weak

looked p okay up to that point, certainly the better side

https://vine.co/v/M3mMh7dKTa2

decent effort to be fair he's made the keeper work there

yes penno

lol completely unjust too

terrifying flashback to remy v fulham pen

ok it's charlie

he's fucking missed

football can fuck back off

Chris Wood definitely not going Wolves, then.

Looking at the fantasy football, could really do with Jordon Mutch doing something in the next five minutes...

galling but not undeserved

much like the whole team mutch had his moments but fairly ragged at the crunch moments. should have been subbed instead of the lovely as ever and criminally mistrusted faurlin

remy remains fine satin negligee in a world of safety overalls. p much like playing with 10 most of the time tbf but still

think Aly Cissokho just pretty much got man of the match in an ultra solid Senderos-Vlaar-Hutton backline ¯\(°_o)/¯

I listened to the today fm commentary for second half of that and have no idea still about anything that happened, only afterwards in the roundup did u realise we were ten vs ten and got a late goal. bizarre.

Pleased with LCFC's fight there, Ulloa looked worth his place too.

Capoue key to the Spuds 3pts too. Solid.

http://wwp.greenwichmeantime.com/time-zone/south-america/chile/images-chile/flag-of-chile.jpg

LOL

Oh.

i didn't realize the games would start airing at FOUR in effing morning

so i'm just watching the last bit of Arsenal & calling it good

https://vine.co/v/M3mMh7dKTa2

decent effort to be fair he's made the keeper work there

reaction of the spurs player top right is the icing on the cake. "oh no, how are we going to re-spot the ball in the exact same place now mummy?`'

richard dunne in a back 3

looks like as good an opportunity as any to pick up the points so i'm fairly sure we'll get pwned by some functional competence

Pretty sure that the instant the first 3-5-2 appeared at the World Cup, Hoddle was all "I knew my time would come again!". The QPR gig is the throwing off of the metaphorical tracksuit that's been coming since that moment.

red card for naughton is a fucking appalling decision Foy is and always was a cunt

Driving down to Loftus Road, blasting The Boys Are Back In Town.

reaction of the spurs player top right is the icing on the cake

Oh, Chrissy Ek. Will you ever win?

van GGGaal interview a good taster of things to come i think, looking forward to mcnulty's take on the aforementioned dutch master.

I'm given to believe that pitch invader had more shots on target than Kevin Nolan and Carlton Cole put together.

it's a possibility that you might be right there matt

For real though that United back three was clearly going to be bullshit.

Masterful bit of getting in the way by Bony for the Swansea opener.

Gullit's a regular this season on motm?

It's weird how on English telly he always seems to make at least some sense, whereas on Dutch telly he's like the David Icke of footy pundits.

I didn't actually see the game but it's strange that LVG didn't play Reece James at left wing-back. He's been excellent there in pre-season. The back three should look a bit healthier when Shaw and Rafael come back and we add a central defender (Benatia maybe?)

hahaha my god steve parish is essex as fuck

He's from Lewisham: http://www.juliehamill.com/post/56962598413/fifteen-minutes-with-steve-parish-crystal-palace-fc

classic cattermole.

Imagine a Parish Sherwood dream team double teaming every press conference.

Younes Kaboul should not be allowed to leap on top of things.

Can't believe we made poor Eric Dier speak English in the press conference.

Koeman automatically wins manager of the season if he brings the translator with him to the post-match interview tomorrow.

Dier sounding like a young Mark E. Smith there

XP oh yes

how can this not be on MOTD?
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/sport/football/article-2726693/Tottenham-West-Ham-s-match-interrupted-pitch-invading-fan-runs-free-kick.html

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/sport/football/article-2726774/DAVID-MOYES-EXCLUSIVE-Manchester-United-never-gave-time-succeed-fail.html

painful

By the time he went to bed on that Easter Monday, he knew he had been. For a start people had not been answering their phones, and when he finally did make contact with Ed Woodward, the club’s executive vice-chairman would only say that he would meet him at Carrington at 8am.

Moyes had no intention of driving in at that time — not when the cameras would be waiting. So he got there four hours early, went for a run, took a shower and then, alone in an empty, eerie building, began to clear his desk. ‘I hadn’t slept a wink,’ he says. ‘But the run gave me a chance to clear my head. A bit of time to think before I started to pack up my stuff.’

Moyes admits he wanted to sign Cesc Fabregas, Gareth Bale and Cristiano Ronaldo

shd've checked to see if Roy Race was available

poor messi never got a look in

assist of the season from Tadic (Henderson's was good too)

wiziwig sopcasts are all offline already, the officials are clamping down for the first few weeks of the new season

Southampton can win this but they need to bring Long on. Pelle has done nothing

The straight Flash streams have been okay from what I've seen.

12.5m

Chuffed that Jovetic is starting, not least 'cause he's in my Fantasy team.

Henderson looked amazing today, looked like Gerrard of old, Gerrard by contrast seemed a bit more Henderson of old. Joe Allen sucked bad.

reckon we should seduce nakh back with a "life and times of paul dummett" thread

Lallana and Markovic to play yet but yeah that was a poor performance today and lacked that spark that Suarez brings. They were lucky to win really.

Sterling looked very sharp though, although whoever allowed him to win a header against them should probably be put out to pasture immediately.

Southampton didn't look like a team in crisis, Ward-Prowse in particular plus a couple of others look capable of stepping up now.

Ward-Prowse loses the ball a bit too easily but looks very capable otherwise. Saints crisis greatly overstated, they'll be fine.

COLBACK DID THE POST-MATCH INTERVIEW WHAT HAS HE BECOME

That Henderson pass, tho. Yum yum yum. If it wasn't against us, obv.

Ward-Prowse very blighter-ish. We've got our whirlwind going again. Kind of want to see us against someone terrible. I think it will be fun.

soton didnt deserve to lose that game at all really. btw that dzeko backheel for silvas goal was shweeet.

10m Southampton bid for Andros rejected

another 3 or 4 might do it but then the going rate for nothing Englishmen is prob twice that?

ONE NIL BURNLEY

not for long

lovely goal

Fabregas is going to be so good for Chelsea

nbd wilshere will come good amirite

ridiculous assist

https://vine.co/v/M3DVBK6Fugi

i like that evil cesc has to have an upsetting hair change just like evil nando

Mourinho hates sideburns

http://yougabsports.com/gfile/75r4!-!FFMLML!-!zrzor45!-!JQINOHHF-LMIP-HDHF-LHHM-JDOPILLRKRNQ!-!72y1nq/mattingly.png

that's what I was going for

I thought it could be but nevertheless I saw the opportunity and pounced on it like Torres.

Adebayor shaved off his hair for Mou too.

cesc :(

Malky Mackay at Palace, tba officially tomorrow. Sighs of release all round it wasn't Sherwood.

I'm off to Dulwich Hamlet v Peacehaven to celebrate.

Release = relief obv.

so...

Cardiff City owner Vincent Tan has taken the ultimate revenge on Malky Mackay.

Crystal Palace yesterday did a dramatic U-turn and withdrew their job offer to former Cardiff boss Mackay.

It came after Cardiff submitted a dossier to the Football Association questioning Mackay’s conduct during his reign at the Welsh club.

Mirror Sport understands the dossier also names Palace director of football Iain Moody who worked with Mackay at Cardiff.

Several top agents and lawyers are also named in the document while it is understood that Tan has refused to pay commission to agents on almost all of the deals done under Mackay’s reign.

Cardiff have questioned the level of fees, commission and role of agents in several deals during Mackay’s two years at the club, which the team won promotion to the top flight for the first time since 1962.

Cardiff are also set to pursue legal action against Palace and Moody in the “Spygate” case.

Palace were fined £10,000 by the Premier League last week after it was alleged that Moody got the Cardiff line-up before they played his former club last season in a vital relegation match.

The dossier and allegations appear to have persuaded Palace co-chairman Steve Parish to put on hold the appointment of a new boss.

moody to resign too it seems

Malky Mackay and Iain Moody investigated by FA over 'sexist, racist and homophobic' text messages during time at Cardiff

yikes

In July 2012, Cardiff signed South Korean international Kim Bo-kyung, but when Moody informed Mackay on July 12 that ‘five of the b******s including the player’ were arriving for talks, the reply from Mackay’s phone was: ‘Fkn chinkys.’ A further message says: ‘Fk it. There’s enough dogs in Cardiff for us all to go around.’

In reference to the prominent football agent, Phil Smith, a text states: ‘Go on, fat Phil. Nothing like a Jew that sees money slipping through his fingers’. The Israeli club, Maccabi Tel Aviv, are also referred to simply as ‘the Jews’.

A football official at another club is referred to as ‘a gay snake’ and ‘the homo’ and someone who is ‘not to be trusted’, while a French player is someone ‘who struck me as an independently minded young homo’.

An exchange with a young player who has a female agent makes reference to a sex act and states: ‘I hope she’s looking after your needs,’ the player is then told. ‘I bet you’d love a bounce on her falsies.’

On August 16, 2012, a list of players proposed by a French agent is forwarded, stating to Mackay that ‘he needs to rename his agency the All Blacks’. A separate text in reference to a list of French players states: ‘Not many white faces amongst that lot but worth considering.’

In a separate exchange a picture entitled ‘Black Monopoly’ is sent, with every square a ‘Go To Jail’ square. Of one African player, it is stated: ‘Doesn’t look like a good cv. And he’s Nigerian.’

that's not good.

Waiting until he had been offered a job to do it is magnificent, ice-cold revenge work, particularly given all the stick Tan took when he fired him.

yeah this is amazing, i hope the fucker never works again

wowsers fucking hell

i don't suppose it's any mitigation that i'd download a mixtape entitled "independently minded young homo" on sight

p sure it was style mags centrepiece shoot last week

iirc didnt the fa do precisely fuck all in response to scudamore's sexist email bantz the other month

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/BvgfmznIgAA5sZW.jpg

see it's a great outfit when u live up to it

best thing about this is that parish is gonna be like "phew close call" *appoints tim sherwood*

https://twitter.com/Ibby_Farah

fuck yeah barry davies is doing palace west ham for motd this weekend

please may he go out in a blaze of haughty glory damning a grim 0-0 draw to hell

i don't suppose it's any mitigation that i'd download a mixtape entitled "independently minded young homo" on sight

― r|t|c, Wednesday, August 20, 2014 10:59 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

made nearly this exact quasi-joke on facebook w/o having read this thread. huh

gay ouroboros

Hmmmmmm, Young Homo

Arsenal had a buy-back option on Fabregas, who left for Barcelona in 2011, but decided not to exercise it.

"I have no regret about that at all. My regret is that he left," said Wenger, whose side play Everton this weekend.

"It was difficult for him to leave us, but after that you accept he can move to some different clubs," he added.

Wenger believes Wales midfielder Aaron Ramsey, 23, is more than filling the void left by Fabregas.

"What is good in life is that someone moves out and someone else takes over and he has developed," he said. "He is younger than Cesc and the potential is there to get more out of him."

detect no butthurt resentment there

"He is younger than Cesc and the potential is there for him to leave once he becomes any good"

Wow mackay is horrible.

"letting off steam to a friend during some friendly text message banter"

you know you're fucked when you go for the banter defence

"It has never been alleged that he wrote any homophobic or sexist messages and he has confirmed that he did not do so"

That's a relief.

wow just caught up on mackay, what a cunt.

He’s not murdered anyone, he’s not a rapist or a paedophile.

Lots of people do that silly tweeting.

I do get text messages from people with sick jokes on when something terrible has happened. I don’t read them, they make me ill.

A fantastic lad, a great, great fella. A family man, a real football man.

I hear people on the radio.

I’m sure no one is suffering like him and his family are today.

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/Bvoqs2yIMAAk5HR.jpg

You've just got to admire the cold Machiavellian ruthlessness of Tan picking his moment like that. Wait til the moment when it will cause maximum damage, then drop the bomb. It's a proper cunt-off.

Overlooked in all this is that Mackay was a shit manager and Palace have had a lucky escape.

Unless they get Sherwood.

lol

The LMA apologises for some of its wording, in its release yesterday, which was inappropriate and has been perceived to trivialise matters of a racist, sexist or homophobic nature. That was certainly not our intention.

It is beyond argument that any comments that are discriminatory, even used in private, are totally unacceptable. The LMA remains absolutely aware of our responsibility to the game and to promote and uphold the highest standards of behaviour.

The LMA will not be commenting further on the allegations relating to Malky Mackay whilst the Football Association conducts its investigation, other than to repeat that both the LMA and Malky will be co-operating fully. We will continue to work with all of the game’s stakeholders to address the important issues of respect and discriminatory behaviour in all its forms.

Yeh keep up that good work that you are doing about that important issue you fucking unbelievably stupid cunts

Fisted Away ‏@fistedaway 3h
Long before Moody & Mackay / Gray & Keys, it's always worth remembering the first people to use the 'banter' defence http://www.theguardian.com/uk/1999/apr/09/lawrence.ukcrime10

Unless they get Sherwood.

― Matt DC, Friday, 22 August 2014 11:35 (43 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Sherwood has now ruled himself out (phew). Lennon is the new favourite with the bookies, with 'The Return of Pulis' now third favourite (as low as 4-1 with Betfred).

Mackay's career is probably over, isn't it? Moody's is definitely. That bantz defence was woeful, LMA come across as piss weak in all this too.

looking forward to the next few barren years of sherwood refusing to be anyone's second choice

The LMA look idiotic rather than weak. Literally nobody expected anyone to come to Mackay's defence.

He’s not murdered anyone, he’s not a rapist or a paedophile.

Lots of people do that silly tweeting.

I do get text messages from people with sick jokes on when something terrible has happened. I don’t read them, they make me ill.

A fantastic lad, a great, great fella. A family man, a real football man.

I hear people on the radio.

I’m sure no one is suffering like him and his family are today.

― peligro, Friday, 22 August 2014 Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

A nauseating defence. Expected nothing less tho'.

tom carroll to Swansea on loan is a v sensible move

look it's not gonna happen for him ok

pfft

u said that about third and Livermore both

actually a tenner on Carroll making up a p dece central trio at hull next year might be a shout

thudd obv

hull aren't really a football team. i feel secure in my judgement

i'm sure when charlton lose this season i'll say the same about the victors

charl'tan

refusing to believe this

Danny Welbeck has been told that he can leave Manchester United, with the forward now hopeful of securing a move to Tottenham Hotspur before the end of the transfer window.

Tottenham are in the market for extra firepower and held talks with Queens Park Rangers over the availability of Loic Rémy this month. They have also considered Mattia Destro, the Roma striker who has attracted interest from Chelsea.

Welbeck could fit the bill, while Sunderland are also pondering a swoop for the 23-year-old. Hull City were willing to pay £12 million for Welbeck’s services, but he has no interest in a move to the KC Stadium.

The England international has two years left on his contract at United and is thought to earn about £50,000 a week, but Louis van Gaal, the new manager, has deemed him surplus to requirements.

Welbeck is out with a knee injury and missed the 2-1 Barclays Premier League opening-day defeat by Swansea City at Old Trafford last Saturday, with Wayne Rooney and Javier Hernandez leading the line.

Robin van Persie will further increase competition in the United ranks after the Holland striker returned to training this week following an extended break after the World Cup. That will leave Welbeck, who has scored 20 goals in 90 Premier League appearances for United, farther down the pecking order.

A nauseating defence.

Fucking hell - I'd assumed that was a cut & paste of various moronic 'have your say' comments, not a whole load of Harry.

LMA backpedalling furiously: http://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/0/football/28896425

I'm 4,174 on the Season Ticket Waiting List!

:D

http://s28.postimg.org/pvcq0doil/image.jpg

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/sport/football/managers/louis-van-gaal/11052364/Louis-van-Gaal-It-has-been-a-very-difficult-start-at-Manchester-United-but-I-will-deliver.html

Cabella's hair is making me feel queasy

regional report: sky down at the tf in castlebar and parking now a euro an hour but the carvery three course is a tenner callin it a draw

jesus wept can someone nudge me toward the best way of str*aming w/out it constantly cutting out. the cpl of online sites i know are unwatchable

also, heard about a thing where access to hd premiership games is only £70 in NZ so my lot are looking into a way of changing ip location and ordering. anyone else done/heard of this?

gone from the http://www.flags.net/images/smallflags/IRAQ0001.GIF goals of yore to http://www.flags.net/images/smallflags/UNST0001.GIF goals

good to see atsu

booooo, that was iraq/usa

Saw Emre Can in Topman this afternoon.

motd anniversary fonts v nice

fuck zarate life ban

yeah i could get used to the retro stylings

bit twee i thought tbh

bazza didnt disappoint mind - "four heads to find, he had to find his own feet first"

yeah i was pretty annoyed at all that 1970s graphics bullshit

every "celebration" is a tawdry rewrite of history

enjoyed shearer's stony expression as savage highly recommended lennon for the palace job

probably just overinterpreted his brainless resting face but still

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/BvzFpXFCYAECIXR.jpg

#believe

Thinking that Lil Aaron might have been quite useful against a team playing three at the back, although I'm eagerly anticipating this Chadli-Traore donkey derby on the left. Otherwise this looks like quite a sensible team selection, glad that a Spurs manager has finally realised that Etienne Capoue is a very good player.

Think you'll beat us in a really annoying way today.

stream v pixelly can I get a lineup pls

lack of VG players not rly our prob in centre mid I think, more the mix

Lloris, Rose, Vertonghen, Kaboul, Dier, Bentaleb, Capoue, Chadli, Eriksen, Lamela, Adebayor.

@GuillemBalague
The price for di María (in euros): United offered 60m, Real wanted 90. Final figure: 80 million, including adds on. £63.9m

that's a lot of money

beautifully taken

thought I've seen soldado non?

well he's on the bench

how much does a set of soldado shirts cost right now

re: motd - I thought the stark white overlays were pleasingly dry. the gesture is obv borne of nostalgia & those minimal graphics were presumably deployed by the same editors who whip up all those mile-a-minute montages/Adverts For The Premier League to get 12 yo's adrenaline up, but they were new to me & their incongruously starchy looked appealed. football culture is quite twee in general w/ its livery & folk songs, none of it looks so hot if analysed from afar, & - sorry if this is a bit reflective lads, bear w/ me - perhaps the appeal of getting emotionally invested in it is, as someone once confessed to me, largely the analgesic pleasure of being stupid for a while. so anyway, I liked the graphics on match of the day last night, I thought they looked nice

so what position is dier playing

This is already way better than any Spurs performance last season. We are just so much faster getting the ball out from the back and way more fluid and intelligent in attack. Overjoyed that Lamela is finally coming good.

Dier at RB I think. Looks excellent.

otm x 3

also winning all 50/50s its strange almost as if you can actually care AND have tactics amazing

special mention for rose, against teams where we need to push up he's really very good. when we need to defend, eh jury's out at best

wow Lamela

chadli for twenty this season at cf

lovely assist from lamela. spurs are looking good here.

Pretty sure that Poch has a good idea of his best XI already, something that AVB and Timmy never did.

Really nice to see Vertonghen playing like he gives a shit again. I'm sure playing in his actual position helps

on a general note is sopcast just not a runner anymore? never have any joy finding good flash streams I'm basically getting noisy holiday slides from this one

nk just found a 5kbps stream so sharp it hz

this one's ok http://www.ifeed2all.eu/type/football.html

put ad blocker on too

this but found a good in

pls pls dembele rehab starts now

I don't think spurs were 4 goals up at any point last season. v early days but it's nice to see some crisp passing

Dembele dispossessed a QPR midfielder, ran half the length of the pitch and then straight into the opposition defence. It was like having Zokora back.

yeah he was rank when he came on

Hey he played an actual honest to god through ball for rose, baby steps

do you still have the receipt for dembele? feel free to return him for another one http://www.fulhamfc.com/player-profiles/moussa-dembele

Great seeing Capoue an autoselect for Spuds at the moment, he's like a beefcake David Howells for the 2Kteens.

Could do with those two Sunderland lads, Brown and O'Shea, in our back three.

absolute shambles

Fletcher and Cleverley midfield is a sick joke

I feel sorry for Fletcher with his health problems, but he's half the player he used to be

Could do with those two Sunderland lads, Brown and O'Shea, in our back three.

Scariest thing is, that's actually true.

Three-at-the-back is still is a shitty fad, especially with untried 20 year-olds or Richard Dunne in it.

lol QPR at ours last season were just heroically inept with 3 at the back, especially since the rwb was aaron hughes

fucking pathetic rangers. didnt expect much this soon just not a clueless shitshow littered with basic errors

no credit deserved whatsoever for dispatching that rabble, you'll not have an easier game. small comfort lamela still looked wank i guess

also watched kerry v mayo after, either would have given us a thumping too

Somewhat off topic: I have a 'new' iphone (not actually new, but sent as a replacement by my insurer) and can't seem to bookmark any threads in ILX when I use it. Anyone know how to fix this?

XP what'd you make of mayo? its the hope that kills you imo

Felt sorry for Mayo, they shouldn't have had your man sent off Imo. Great match.

Can you take this somewhere else? This thread is for Prem football and iphone talk only.

I've bumped the relevant thread tbf

I'll use that one...

this fuckin guy

"Like I said, I thought the sending off was harsh. You can let players get away with dumb stuff like that in GAA surely, it wasn't malicious. Kerry that bit cleverer with the ball, I fear Mayo have blown their chance.

― everyday sheeple (Michael B), Sunday, 24 August 2014 20:10 (10 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

But why won't my phone bookmark ILX threads, eh?

― Turtleneck Work Solutions (Nasty, Brutish & Short), Sunday, 24 August 2014 20:12 (8 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink"

Based on the evidence today (some clever runs from Eriksen, that thing Lamela did when he let the ball run past him which caused the defenders a moment of confusion) I'd say this Spurs XI are learning how to put attacks together. This is in stark contrast to the AVB era of running down the middle of the pitch toward a line of defenders.

young lol cunt

https://twitter.com/FTBL_Likealooks

enjoying these greatly

morohnooooooooo

v neat

lovren not covering himself in glory tonight

skrtl animal life ban

ice

Fastest goal by a substitute: 1.8 seconds, Nicklas Bendtner (for Arsenal v. Tottenham Hotspur, 22 December 2007

Aguero wasn't far of!

foul by sterling imo

this second half has been...not good

last man standing wins

man city kinda just ....."whatever" ....then scoring

Can't say I was sorry to see Johnson walking down the tunnel

FYI: Three at the back? Early in the sack." Van Gaal won't be on these '14-'15 UEFA Champions League nights thread

Fletcher and di Maria in a midfield two. I dunno I dunno

assumed di Maria was gonna be a wing back

nah, even van Gaal isn't that insane. I really hope we move to a 433 when everyone's fit though. And he drops one of van Persie or Rooney

Di Maria has been excellent as a midfielder for Real under Ancelotti, United have lacked real attacking threat from midfield for so long now, but I can't see it working without a Xabi or a Modric there to release him quickly.

Just, structurally this XI doesn't work at all, Di Maria and Mata might just get in each other's way, what'll probably happen is that one of them will find themselves drifting wide. Also that 3-5-2 will be torn to pieces the second they play a side with decent wide men. They need Luke Shaw and Rafael back desperately, and proper cover in the fullback/wingback posessions. Man, this squad is such a mess.

If I were LvG I'd consider throwing this match just to panic the Glazers and Woodward into making five or six signings quickly.

pissweak hoofball rubbish. Di Maria a slight positive

The lack of Carrick in the team is so glaringly obvious.

Dunno who the BT Sport commentator is but I'm not sure I can cope with an entire season of "thanks Scholesy".

http://abload.de/img/differentemotionalhoasqr4p.gif

NN, have you seen any of the matches MU played in the US? I haven't. How come they won them all, and are shit now? What's changed?

I saw them all! And...I don't know

we looked so confident on the tour - knocking it about really nicely, Young actually doing brilliantly in the wing-back role - then the season starts and the team just looks utterly clueless and terrified. Not one of the central defenders knows what to do when they have the ball so they're just hoofing it aimlessly. Herrera, Shaw, and Rafael (although I have an uneasy feeling LVG rates Valencia over him) getting injured has been a blow but this formation just looks wrong to me

Fletcher has become a serious problem too. Baffled that LVG made him vice-captain.

He's supposed to be the one linking attack and defence but he's just ambling around getting knocked off the ball. He's so clearly done at this level

kinda can't wait to see qpr vs u lot in a few weeks, gonna be the most inept fitba exhibition of all time at this rate

Quite baffling. What I've seen from the defenders in the league is they indeed look absolutely terrified. Think both left and right wingers should help defense out more when the opponent has the ball, but c'mon, any moron can see that. It's not flowing, it's static and this radiance of fear - like they just saw medusa - I've no idea why that is.

I was going to say I can see this game just drifting away to a boring 0-0, but part of me still believes Burnley can nick a goal

A shot! We had a shot!

Fuck me this is dreary.

subbed for Anderson. The humanity

solved the dunne in a cb 3 conundrum by putting clint hill at lb in a 4. nice one arry have a new contract

four years ago we signed clint as backup and here we are still clinging to his realness bosom

apparently 'Arry just confirmed Remy to Chelsea?

Desperate panic buy after the Costa injury but it might work.

Thursday 14 August 2014

“I don’t think he would want to do that either to us. He’s a good lad, he’s got a good relationship with the chairman. With a week to go before the window closes we all need to know where we’re going. I don’t think he would suddenly walk away the day before. I think he’s too decent a guy to do that.”

Fuck me this is dreary.

Yup. Steaming dog turd of a game.

fair dos tbh but going to the scum smarts

not rly v desperate and panicky, upgrade on nando albeit not one remotely suited to mourinho's ways

thought they'd go for destro

warnock for united

oh my Routledge

https://vine.co/v/OBhX2aMZn3Y

lol nice

gonna give it another week or so before i poll Moyes vs LvG

give him the next game back at least

who needs a fuckin remy

GWAN CHARLIE

oh i say that routledge goal

looking forward to the first bookie paying off on Chelsea for the title

Happening right about now

was just coming to say

lock thread then.

btw lads...

http://streamsp.com/

http://balls.ie/football/gif-joe-hart-howler-helps-stoke-1-0-win-man-city/

Everton back in it!

LOOOOOL at Costa giving Coleman a gobful after the og

wow

Proper game this m8s, proper game

jfc

hideous defending from Everton

holee shit

O_O

are you kidding me

blitw

this is fucking nuts

we luv goals

nic'e

holy shit

Costa is very very good

the routledge goal

the third Swansea goal tbh

Stuck around, Football League on now. Is Scott Parker not even good enough any more to play for a PL team? Somehow that makes me a bit sad tbh

a tiny island of sanity in a fucked culture

Costa is very very good

He certainly is. Hes a proper bollix as well.

Speaking of bollixes, Balotelli starts with Sturridge

FYI if Spurs beat Liverpool by more than three goals then they will be top of the league on my wedding day.

congratulations..........spurs

I'm not holding my breath on this one.

i'm sure she's lovely

oh hey look no centre halves

gratts_DC ov

who the fuck was that

kinda tackle I'd be complaining about were it Johnson on eriksen tbh

brilliant tackle. Like this Dier guy

anyway these idiots are ignoring the Liverpool wingers and we know kaboul and vertonghen cbf actually covering for that so tbh this could be any score

That was such a let off for Lloris.

the ref should have blown for the push

but kaboul looks a fucking mess. no position and no judgement.

He's been finished for years, I think his brief period of competency was an aberration in an otherwise calamitous career.

he was a reasonably successful Pompey full back iirc

adebayor has killed everything with his running

ooof

fucks sake lads one of ye

keeper shdnt have had a prayer there, placement rather than power needed

lol "fuck off stevie"

what in the fuck the second half can't have started already now what have the cunts done

anyone see what happened?

we .....

we can't kick

wait is that srsly the penalty?

absolutely fuck this cunt ref

Dier made a fairly ineffectual grab at Allen who had gone past him v easily into the box. hella soft but not totally fabricated.

two years of seeing bale get booked instead of penalties/red cards cos fat cunts like dowd couldnt keep up with play then he gives that, slow hard death on the cunt

anyway our set piece takers cannot actually kick the ball into the box from the wings this is a problem

also if the high line appears again this season or ever with kaboul selected then poch out

bahahahaha

Well that substitution paid off.

Would happily never see Andros play for Spuds ever again

lol tbf poch out

thought gbx was lollin at eriksen for Townsend fwiw and like fair enough

We always manage to lose in a really annoying way just before the international break. Two weeks of stewing awaits.

i thought that odd, too, tbh

God we need a new striker so badly.

Does the wedding still go ahead if Spurs aren't top?

what the shit sterling

new striker and three new centre halves

but its OK we signed a DMC midweek so at least that's a start

wtf at this ongoing defence does a new manager not even look at the fucking tapes or what's wrong with them

On the plus side I won't have to get married in full kit any more.

Jesus we are making these lads look as good as the fans would have you believe, but I saw em last Monday and youse, sirs, are no cl qualifiers

Kagawa back to Dortmund for 6.5m. Fucking depressing

and apparently Hernandez is going to Madrid, which I'm less bothered about

this is so reminiscent of avb neutered shit nothing forty yards out that idk how levy or anyone at the club can stand over it tomorrow morning

Would've been better starting with Davies than Rose imho. Too open. Am not going to panic over getting done by a well-reinforced Liverpool who've been last season level good for much of today.

they've played nothing today and we've only learned about kaboul and vertonghen in a high line and adebayor in 2014- and a manager at spurs needing to learn that lesson should be on trainee wages

refs had a blinder.

Can't really take many positives from that game except I feel there are a few players who appear to be playing their way out of the club. We have a surfeit of fairly similar midfielders and a real lack of creativity in the middle. Liverpool defended very well today but we could have been doing so much more to open them up.

We looked v nice. But then we usually do v spurs these days. Balo looks like he could be awesome when he clicks but today didn't rly happen for him.

getting frustrated just thinking about welbeck and townsend together

unless i guess maybe welbz can backheel deflect fierce shots in from deep channels 20 yards out

fazio and stambouli wd suggest the management are on it tbf. lot rests on the latter tho on the basis of today/the whole time since modders left

why do villa have 7 points already, can't they just get what's coming to them

eriksen replaces modric p well imo

Townsend eriksen not so much poch out

Eriksen is a #10, Modric is a deep-lying playmaker. If we're going to play this system we really need both (or a DM who can double up as one by releasing the ball quickly).

yep

Kagawa back to Dortmund

'this system'

only getting 6m for kags is feeble as fuck

Darragh I'm assuming you aren't completely ignorant of how Pochettino's Southampton team played and what he might be trying to achieve here, but if I'm wrong please feel free to disabuse me of that notion.

wedding nerves imo

but srsly

to deploy that back line in such a way as to play to every possible Liverpool strength while clearly, had last seasons performances been available for any basic analysis, undermining any use we might find for kaboul, idk I'm feeling pochettino's influence in attack the first few games but today a team that was always going to camp and break were given the keys and shown how to use the microwave

course its early days, course he has to work on his system- today wasn't the day to try something that everyone knew was going to kill us when playing, imo, the team we'll be fighting for fourth place.

never really thought of the game in that context for some strange reason

think ur generally right but poch probably felt there was more to gain in the long run from sticking to the script against decent opposition plus maybe reckoning sakho might gift u a tap-in or five (not unreasonable)

this game now sounds like good craic on the radio. rly cba to watch arsenal tho

just got back from Villa Park. thoroughly deserved the win, and it's not often i'm able to say that these days. wish i could say that it was based purely on merit but tbh Hull were contemptuously bad for most of the game. Utterly incapable of dealing with even the simplest runs from Agbonlahor and Weimann, both of whom worked very hard all day. Thudd looked like an aging and overworked creche attendant, creaking about looking vaguely panicked as the little lads Delph and Westwood ran rings round him.

Some first class tactical subbing from Lambert bringing on the boy Grealish with 15 mins to go, Hull in the ascendency, crowd not really feeling it - all the lad did was get kicked from pillar to post, but he won about 6 free kicks and got the crowd mad riled, Keano was up there giving the 4th ref some beans, Guzan had to come rushing out of his goal to calm it all down a few times. Just a great way to kill off the final part of the match.

Darren Bent had a 10 minute cameo, fucked up a blindingly good 1-on-1 and did nothing else whatsoever. why are we still paying this cunt?

Looked better in spells today then we have for several years, I am feeling distinctly cheered and optimistic by all this. Appreciate your frustrations RTC, must suck knowing you're gonna be back in the Championship this time next year

Hull getting three separate players booked in <10 minutes for various assaults on Grealish was...impressive?

never really thought of the game in that context for some strange reason

― r|t|c

what can I say I'm a fuckin optimist hey

lol i knew i'd get a bite from that, as i've said before i bear no ill will to the villa as an venerable institution just lambert is a dogshit manager and i wouldnt mind not seeing any of ur current playing staff ever again is all

xp walloping us lot in full-on pub team mode can only billow aspirations tbf

yeah and we're all just paying it fwd to Chelsea afaict

http://metro.co.uk/2014/09/07/manchester-united-may-have-only-signed-radamel-falcao-on-one-year-loan-deal-because-of-true-age-4859619/

could be real. there was a nigerian striker that turned out to be in his forties when someone bought him as a 28-year-old. yakubu or something like that.

fucking top reporting from The Sun there, repackaging a year old story

That's bullshit about Yakubu. Strikers in their 40s do not score nearly a hundred Premiership goals and it's a trope that's routinely trotted out about African players. Mourinho tried to do it with Eto'o in the summer.

teju cole on nigerian age cheats &c. is a good read - http://www.vanityfair.com/online/fairplay/2010/05/letter-from-lagos

fields of salmon doing the 'i'm not racist' thing a power of good right here

someone has to, or it wouldn't be football lbh

https://38.media.tumblr.com/874e81c6386042c89836316b3d6bb535/tumblr_nbox5bSPyx1qarx6zo1_500.jpg

Manchester United @ManUtd · 20m
Congratulations to Wayne Rooney, who's won #mufc's August Goal of the Month for his acrobatic strike vs Swansea.

his fuckin wha

christ what a total bummer it is watching ozil these days

just give him a big bag of haribo and tell him to go on a long walk until his contract runs out or something

pretty sure he'd choke on the Haribo

he exists in a vague conceptual space rather than any tangible reality these days

dear god he's bad now isn't he

wilshere's been...quite good?

did you see his dive in the first half?

nah but i saw that one ;)

he's still been quite good

vindication

that was indeed quite good

and so!

wilshere looking like england's best player here

the screen kept freezeframing while Iain Dowie was doing his Stoke-Leicester report just now. suspect the results will stay with me for a while

"put one in your belly, leave you smelly, then take your Graziano Pelle" is gonna be too long for a dn I think :/

is it dumb of me to be slightly surprised how many of the panel got Jeff's Smiths joke

absolutely unreal how many technical fuckups there've been on the programme today. desks getting cleared on Monday 'methinks'

ok lol i'm gonna have to watch this 2nd half

villa's line-up is almost as amazing as the scoreline

Think Big Phil's fucked it, should have made it 2-0 and now he's gonna get sent off cos of his determination to goad Mario into doing something the commentator can shout "WHY ALWAYS HIM INDEED" at

sgt biscuits what are your current thoughts on paul lambert, alchemist

n'zogbia seems ancient by now

"aston villa fans hiding behind sofas across the united states"

i know it's ESPN but i grinned

EZ Snappin presumably building a cushion fort rn

sgt biscuits what are your current thoughts on paul lambert, alchemist

¯\_(ツ)_/¯

I wish I had a sofa to hide behind!

Such a different team this year.

Kevin Logan: All the "Liverpool missing Luis Suarez" talk is redundant as he would have been banned! Seems everyone's forgetting that!

I don't...what?

Chris Harvey: So Liverpool and Man United have swapped places from title contenders to seventh place for one year only and are duly swapping back.

B...but Chris, M...unh?

http://news.bbcimg.co.uk/media/images/77573000/jpg/_77573337_455372690.jpg

Oh my word he's actually turning into Klopp...

that Arsenal/Man City game was a corker! also watched chelsea/swansea which, ok diego costa killed it but why does no-one talk abt him seeming like a huge prannet. am I imagining that?

still don't have a rooting interest yet so this all ~love of the game~ bollocks for me atm.
ps no fucking idea wtf youse are talking abt most of the time but :D

fuck spurs

Glad you're enjoying it!

Xp, obvs.

Also, Otm.

lol

second SV post woefully redundant haha

Arsenal being so Arsenal this season, it's almost like Scholesy or whichever idiot said it was right and Arsene has something against buying defenders and non-fancy players, except that's mental

Jose is such a cunt, his antics are getting too much to bear and when they win the league it will be like an old tramp spitting in everyone's face but supposedly somehow charming and tactically brilliant

De Gea, Rafael, Evans, Rojo, Blackett, Blind, Herrera, Mata, Di Maria, Rooney, van Persie

Subs: Lindegaard, Shaw, Fletcher, Januzaj, Valencia, A Pereira, Falcao.

so it could be a 433 or a 352 depending on where Blind is playing. It's probably still the latter annoyingly

What did Jose do now?

that Arsenal/Man City game was a corker! also watched chelsea/swansea which, ok diego costa killed it but why does no-one talk abt him seeming like a huge prannet. am I imagining that?

He acted like a shitbag against Everton as well. He's got all the hallmarks of a classic EPL heel.

LVG has confirmed it's four at the back. Huzzah

Jose keeping the ball behind his back wasting time so Swansea couldn't take a throw in really irked me for some reason, but he always gets away with this shit. Classic heel behaviour but he'll never get his comeuppance

yeah that seemed v childish! love that the swansea player gave him a shove

heel behaviour that refuses to take thicko shithead 'unspoken rules of the game' srsly will always be classic, but particularly so in a league that champions the thuggery of meaty central defenders as masters of dark arts

@FALCAO
No se pierdan hoy x @DIRECTVCo canales 625 y 626 @ManUtd vs Qeens Park Rogers
10 am Colombia los espero.

come on rogers don't roll over for these cunts for once in ur lives

fucks sake no pressing today hey lads

this going to be a pasting, arry is a coward

I think we're actually going to win a game of football

steady...

At the very least it resembles actual football this time.

no opposition, no game, no win, unlucky lads

Hull City manager Steve Bruce says it is "disrespectful" to be linked with replacing Newcastle boss Alan Pardew.

"I find it very disrespectful that I am linked with somebody else's job when he is still in the job"...I am just concentrating on our game against West Ham on Monday...I have only been at Hull a couple of years and they have been really good. They gave me the chance to get up and running again and for that I will always be grateful."

Bruce exhibiting his standard loyalty level then

http://i.imgur.com/zkfvy7Q.jpg

Half decent.

playing at the base of the midfield ;)

Yes. I am aware NN. No need to rub it in. #fml

;)

there were one or two moments where he was shrugged off the ball a bit too easily but he looked so calm and composed throughout. I really like the system we played today.

so great to have Rafael back as well. It's astounding how many media dicks still don't rate him/consider Valencia a better option. Tony's cameo showed how painfully limited he is in comparison. Just have to pray he stays fit

Yeah, I thought Blind was p good. Just like Herrera btw. Both looked cool and composed. And agreed on Rafael.

"Fer's not fit, needs to get match fit. He's been away with Holland, not played in two games, probably been used as a cone and all that, stood around."

arrrrgghhhhhh fuck off harry u lazy cunt

"Bruce exhibiting his standard loyalty level then"

Out of 8 managerial appointments in 16 years Brucie has only been sacked twice, he must be bloody good!

habit of walking off as soon as anybody offers him more money

Even when Town sacked him he had effectively downed tools and walked.

Excellent goal from Enner Valencia tonight.

Manchester United winger Antonio Valencia has been ordered by manager Louis van Gaal to take English lessons – despite having lived here for eight years.

Van Gaal is determined his current squad, which includes a number of native Spanish-speakers, should all become fluent in English to help communication on the training ground and the pitch.

Newcomers Angel Di Maria, Marcos Rojo, Radamel Falcao and Ander Herrera have all had twice-weekly lessons arranged for them alongside goalkeeper David de Gea, who is in his fourth season at the club, and Valencia, who first arrived in the Premier League to play for Wigan Athletic in 2006 before signing for United three seasons later.

Di Maria and Rojo, who arrived this summer for a combined price of £75milion, barely speak a word of English and will take beginners’ classes together.

It is expected that Falcao, who spoke broken English at his formal press conference unveiling on Thursday, and Herrera will be promoted to join de Gea in intermediate classes over the coming weeks. Valencia has asked for one-to-one tuition.

i've never been assigned a premiership footballer :(

imagine the bantz tho

yeah, imagine

http://rreddevils.files.wordpress.com/2013/05/profil-lengkap-antonio-valencia.jpg

so many layers of irony, and the deathstare to cut through them all

I bet De Gea skips all his lessons and spends the time roaming around in Sainsbury's like an overgrown teenager.

Sports ppl from outside the European Union need to have a verified level of English or they lose their visa status.

Dublin has been awarded three group games and a round of 16 fixture at Euro 2020, with London to host the semi-final and final.

The Aviva Stadium will be the venue for three group games and a last-16 fixture in the 24-team tournament.

Wembley Stadium will host the semi-finals and final. London emerged as favourite for the final over Munich after the German FA effectively agreed to stand aside in exchange for support for their Euro 2024 bid.

There was some consolation for Munich; it will host three group games and a quarter-final, along with Baku, St Petersburg and Rome.

Seven other cities, Copenhagen, Bucharest, Amsterdam, Bilbao, Budapest, Brussels and Glasgow, will also stage three group games and a last 16 fixture.

Euro 2020 is being spread across Europe to mark the 60th anniversary of the tournament.

it should always be done this way but fair dues to the fai

http://i.imgur.com/HsJlcrW.gif

clinical strike, villa

oh nice stuff

West Ham two up in seven minutes.

that was a bit of a pity, we looked pretty good out there for the first 30 mins or so. calamity 3 minutes and it was done and dusted. Lambert did fuckall to change it up in the second half, we didn't chase the game whatsoever, spent most of the time sitting outside our own area letting Arsenal play keep-ball.

Felt really sorry for Carlos Sanchez too, he played very badly tbf but man did he ever lose the crowd quickly. Was astonished that Lambert left him on for the whole thing, his every touch was getting jeered from about 20 mins and it clearly rattled him, he gave the ball away almost every time he received it. In the end Cleverly just had to come back and hold his hand, offering the short pass every time. Sanchez might as well have not been there.

The change that Lambert did make was to bring on Grealish for Weimann at half-time which was actually a huge backwards step. Really demonstrated how vital Weimann's running is to knit everything together, Agbonlahor was just so isolated in the second half that we weren't able to get anything happening going forwards.

Ciaran Clark remains an irredeemably useless cunt, never want to see him again

What the fuck Liverpool? I'm glad I'm not watching it.

In the end Cleverly just had to come back and hold his hand

fuck he must have been shit

lalana more like banana :D

Adam Lallana doesn't look like Adam Lallana without his facial hair.

motd highlights somehow made qpr look a quarter decent.... make no mistake, we are fucked all over again

Ferdinand was outsprinted, easily, by Crouch at one point in the first half. Playing him as part of a central defensive pairing, unless it's next to someone as good as Vidic, is madness: no pace; no concentration; no physical presence. He appears to have lost everything and to just be going through the motios.

Fer only knows how to run forward: can't get above a jog going back. Isla, brought in specifically to play as an attacking wing back, is having mares every week having to play as a conventional full back.

Relegation, here we come, again.

aw

seriously made crouch look like zlatan yesterday

the whole timeline of the 352 experiment is so shambolic you could cry... sign players specifically with it in mind (don't school them particularly on it though oh no), then fudge it playing dunne instead of onuoha, players inevitably panic and get walloped and truculent, decide to go back to a 4 but sell the popular solid specialist right back (who worked his bollocks off to get you promoted) the day before...

no one knows what the fuck they're doing, arry just relying on the expensive talent to maybe fluke something game to game

spurs: seventy nothing passes, lose it, wba one long ball past our lathering centre halves, chance on goal.

repeat until poch out

three good goals and an absolutely dogshit penalty decision from Clattenburg in the Leicester-Utd game

haha oh man wait

Spurs haven't had a shot on target since Sunderland.

3-3! Leicester had a questionable penalty, now Cambiasso's just got the equalizer.

we're passing ourselves to death, which is really a novel approach. management to achieve stats to justify shit performances.

and paulinho is dogshit

Jesus Christ we're shooting practice for west brom under Irvine at our place, this has been a serious three game low imo

poch out.

4-3 to leicester. wtf.

The date of the LvG vs Moyes poll gets closer!

wow

awful defending. vardy's terrorized the utd defence all half.

Good grief

poch burying this result obv

swapped Sandro Thudd and Caulker for Chiriches Paulinho and Capoue and lost money

never mind bale/modric tbh

5-3 to Leicester. Incredible.

across the league I'm kinda developing a distaste for managers actively fucking up entire squads of players I should be enjoying

Spuds would be okay with an actual genuinely good striker now. Completely overreliant on Eriksen and even fucking Chadli for actual goals.

As a Leicester-born I was ecstatic watching today, greating seeing Vardy show a proper audience how good he can be, and lol at Lineker swearing his joyful arse off on Twitter to celebrate.

if there was any question before today, there's your answer... qpr are definitely down, i am saying it after 5 games

conference won't know what hit it next season tbf

spurs won't be OK until we get an actual defence and get back an actual midfield another long season of shit ahead until we get in another no-doubt cretinous motivator type, reset and piss it all away again.

jimmy floyd can stay imo

Manchester United stars slammed the substitution of Angel di Maria during a fiery dressing-room inquest after their shocking 5-3 defeat at Leicester.

Di Maria, who had scored an early contender for Barclays Premier League goal of the season to put United 2-0 up, was substituted when the score was 3-3.

During scenes described by one source at the King Power Stadium as ‘very heated’, a United player was heard to say: ‘Why the f*** did we substitute Di Maria?’

I presumed it was a fitness thing, ADM adjusting to the pace of the EPL. Didn't seem particularly odd.

It probably was fitness related but I mentally conceded defeat as soon as he went off. Funny that the Utd players did too

neverending shootout at Anfield!

and Liverpool win it 14-13

quite glad mboro went to extra time and an epic shootout; we've got them on saturday

Chris Smalling injured in training, which means Marcos Rojo is Utd's only available centre-back for the weekend

doesn't bode well... play blind as a cb perhaps?

him or Rooney I guess

http://balls.ie/football/nobody-seen-former-liverpool-striker-david-ngog-six-days/

Manchester United stars slammed the substitution of Angel di Maria during a fiery dressing-room inquest after their shocking 5-3 defeat at Leicester.

Di Maria, who had scored an early contender for Barclays Premier League goal of the season to put United 2-0 up, was substituted when the score was 3-3.

During scenes described by one source at the King Power Stadium as ‘very heated’, a United player was heard to say: ‘Why the f*** did we substitute Di Maria?’

pretty awesome if true that the united players all admit they're too shit to beat leicester without di maria

well it was di maria's replacement who gave the ball away for leicester's fourth iirc

omfg what a hit

Yep

jesus

the whole of the valley north stand interior is in raptures

enjoyed that

lolRooney

https://vine.co/v/OZgbmMx1xvu

Real England

austin and pelle exchanging dream cf goals

https://vine.co/v/OZgeqAbaqvP

https://vine.co/v/OZg5KILrAtw

daaaaaang

think the austin might be better? they're both exquisite

naughton starting for spurs. you poor fuckers

the austin touch&goal is one beautiful action

spurs are playing arsenal off the pitch

Michael Oliver so far ahead of all the other English refs it's not funny btw

Kaboul was immense today. Good point that.

Could watch Van Gaal's botched English interviews all day every day

wba look...quite good

yes but they were playing...Burnley

kinda feel for burnley but it's hard to dismiss the notion they put the cue on the rack before the season even started... like i'd wager had they stayed in the championship they've have spent the same amount of money in the summer and far more imaginatively

dyche formed an excellently adroit unit out of them last season but they were still extremely fortunate to have vokes and ings not miss a game until the title was in the bag (likewise as unfortunate to have both buggered for a prolonged period currently)

despite their and wba's crapness and barring newcastle for the likely temporary moment qpr are still the only side in the league who are outright incompetent

2nd half of that burnley game was brutal to watch

Even if Burnley are rooted to the bottom at christmas I still respect the fuck out of Dyche for the immediate transformation of Scott Arfield from L1 flop to top 3 Championship midfielder, for that he deserves honours for his coaching skills.

Can anyone hook me up with a stream that's just 90mins of Alan Pardew on the touchline today? No football, just the manager ranting incoherently, swearing at Mark Hughes and then just 45mins of him staring in the middle distance with a look of torment on his face.

FUCK sake. Ander Herrera has fractured a rib

“Next year I’m moving to England. I will play in the cradle of football. This will be my last season at Barcelona.”

walking around west london on my tuition rounds will become completely unbearable

hell, all my tutees will be wearing them

the end of days

who

took it as no context being all that was needed

oh yeah sorry the quote was from felipe mattioni

lol

but mostly sad

syke lads it was dani alves himself

gl whenever u take the 'googling events' class btw deems

I was about to launch into explanation but OTOH no finn

"There is no racism in football," Mourinho said. "If you are good, you are good. If you are good, you get the job. If you are good, you prove you deserve the job.

"Football is not stupid to close the doors to top people. If you are top, you are top."

could they not at least rename the rooney rule to the twp rule

was hoping ilx would get thru the day without paying that pluperfect cunt any heed

Balotelli DROPPED for Lambert

burnley 2 whole goals <3

also i know this is not that thread & yr all well 'ard football lads but i will just state for the record that i am crushing super hard on Fat Frank

anyway i was bummed west brom couldn't tie liverpool, they looked p good for a while there

and man city arsenal game was hilar for the craziness of so many missed goals, man city facial expressions for first half were lol

*and now back to srs football talk*

tbh coming on here and confusing aston villa for arsenal is only to be encouraged and u shd do it more often

fat frank is a looker, no two ways

o fuck

sb me right now

looool

i have also decided to follow west ham

not entirely bcz of iron maiden, but yes it was a contributing factor :)

ur heart is lost to diego poyet for ever more

west ham, veeg?!

https://twitter.com/TheBig_Sam

Watching 'The NeverEnding Story' with the lads. Fucking huge mistake. Big Carlton went berserk when that fucking horse died in the swamp.

loool

@TheBig_Sam: United on Saturday. Should be training these cunts but this new Ahex Twin joint has me fucking entranced. Throwing shapes all over the shop.

xpost

@TheBig_Sam: "Where horse go, boss?!" he yelped, tears streaming down his delicate face. "Where horse go? Horse go heaven? BRING BACK HORSE!!"

baines finally fails to score a penalty

save of the season from DDG just now

Mourinho and Wenger wrestling! Yes!!

http://vine.co/v/OKhFVvJ1UYW

strong gotm

Phil Neville is currently talking about 'Eric Labamba' on MOTD.

yep

second cousin of Djemba-Djemba

Arsenal midfielder Mesut Ozil is likely to be out for 10 to 12 weeks with a knee injury, the German FA has confirmed.

Ozil played the full 90 minutes in Arsenal’s 2-0 defeat to Chelsea on Sunday but, having joined up with the German national squad, complained about a problem in his left knee and was sent for an MRI scan in Munich on Wednesday.

A statement on the DFB website read: “The MRI examination today at National Dr. Hans-Wilhelm Muller-Wohlfahrt in Munich revealed a partial rupture of the outer band of the left knee joint.

“The treatment is conservative, with six weeks of immobilisation of the knee joint. Mesut Ozil is likely to be (out for) 10 to 12 weeks.”

as i said in the pub earlier: result for Arsenal

picked another winner with that new physio eh

six weeks of immobilisation of the knee joint

not much different from the previous six weeks playing amirite

Liverpool have been dealt another significant blow after Daniel Sturridge broke down in his first session since returning to training. Brendan Rodgers had been hoping to have Sturridge back in time for Sunday’s game at Queens Park Rangers or Wednesday’s Champions League fixture, but after a five-week lay-off since picking up a thigh injury on England duty the striker could now be out for another month with a calf strain.

yipes

god dammit

bloody good game of BPL football happening right now

Lamela at fault for both goals.

any sources for somewhere as hq as /sp/streams? site is on hiatus

follow @GoldenStreamer

So it appears that all that stuff about Kaboul being good again was complete bullshit.

course it was ffs we have no defence.

we'll finish top 8 if lucky and it's all charlatanism and spin

apparently i can't even get a fuckin audio commentary, hurrah for the power of the fuckin internet but

high line with these players is madness, regardless of the overall context of the coach's vision for pressing up the pitch.

Not seen much football this season so far, but our fluid three behind the striker are really very good now. Shame about the striking options in front of them though, stick someone competent in front of them and we'd be able to get away with the occasional defensive brainfreeze.

no doubt there's lines across the pitch (yeah, mainly the three behind the striker) that are starting to form better understandings and fluency than ever seemed the case once avb had gotten his claws in, but rly the flow of the ball from back to front is still as stuttered and confused as it's been for what seems like forever.

eriksen is a real player and makes up for so much around him. everyone else is either unreliable from minute-to-minute (lamela, adebayor, soldado) or is ok-to-good in a fairly limited context (chadli, mainly- who i think is showing how he can best be utilised this season but still looks like there are basic elements of football that will always escape his understanding).

the two sitting/controlling players behind the three aren't really doing enough of anything imo, let that be a work in progress

the defence is really, really bad, and if pochettino doesn't realise that individually the propensity for miscontrol/positioning/concentration lapse errors makes his high-line formation an impossibility then i don't think anything is going to even get the chance to develop from the deep midfield onwards.

strikers are a disaster obv but yknow you can live with that, a manager can't really plan for it once the season starts. but there's so muvh more he could do with the defensive unit just by asking less of them and getting more conservative with their starting positions.

cold sweat at the thought of anything happening lloris obv.

Concentration lapses in defence are a problem whether you're playing deep or high though, a crucial fuckup is a crucial fuckup. Poch is way more tactically flexible than AVB, we're not even playing a particularly high line today, I suppose the point is for a double holding midfield to do most of the pressing today, this isn't out and out terrible from us but not particularly good either. We need two players desperately - a top class deep lying playmaker and a really good line-leading CF and both of those are £30m players.

strikers are a disaster obv but yknow you can live with that, a manager can't really plan for it once the season starts

This isn't actually true at all, but it can't be repeated enough that if we were scoring more we'd be able to live with the defence.

(In general I believe we're improving and that Poch has a plan for the team that will work provided he's allowed to make the right personnel changes).

there's every reason to believe that, tbf, and only sad and bitter experience not to

xps absolutely must disagree with you that another central midfielder -of any type- is a priority ahead of a centre half with some pace able to turn up fit and stand in the right place

we need to score more, def, but imo the instability of the defence and the number and quality of chances we give away out of very standard positions/situations sends quivers throughout the team/stadium, at least the missed chances are a positive indicator

Yeah maybe on the centre half, Fazio looks a bit too slow to be the answer. He's huge though. That Poch has played four or five players in front of Capoue now suggests he knows that's a problem position. The midfielders we have are all too similar.

Good start to the second half though.

in every game ive seen bar LFC & WBA there's been encouraging signs of adaptability, even if the changes made weren't the answer

lol you had one job roberto

reports seem to suggest another v soft penalty idk obv the defender shouldnt be giving the option but after the lfc one cant help feeling we've got something coming to us

two jobs

that was an xp believe it or not had no idea about that penalty

must look up ratios of shots on/off target and from what range for the epl, we've got to be in bad shape there

I was way too confident that Soldado would score that.

great comfort in only seeing the reverse order update tbph, it's the hope as kills

lol

this will be 5-1

at least

hnh what have i missed now

Jonathan Woodgate style debut there.

ye olde spurs farce

ah

Rose misjudges a high ball down the City right

look im not being wise after the fact matt but text updates of spurs games have "<<spurs defender name>> misjudges a <<event>>" templates available for convenience

Srsly though fuck off was that a red. Dreadful refereeing performance throughout.

tryin to look on the bright side, does mason look another useful squad prospect we can sell to hull before signing his holtby equivalent

that was absolutely a red sorry

only mitigation was the slight flick kaboul got on the cross but nah red, awful defending, cheat cunt etc

'a normal player does not score that goal' bullshit, commentator is idiot. vertonghen turned like a 747

couple of years of seeing bale hacked to bits by the impervious last man will colour yr view of what a red is perhaps idk

The north Londoners will face the defending champions again in a fortnight and Kaboul has urged his teammates to ready themselves for a more closely contested battle.

"What happened last season was last season," the Frenchman said. "In football the most important thing is the present and we look at the future. We look forward to this game.

"Football is football, you never know what can happen, but mentally and physically we have to be ready for this game."

The centre-back played a leading role as Tottenham recorded their first win in five Premier League outings with a hard-fought 1-0 victory over Southampton on Sunday.

He believes the players will head into the international break on a high and hopes to build on this result against City.

"When you lose, you learn, especially Man City or Man U or Chelsea," Kaboul said. "We look forward to this game.

motherfucker youve never learned shit i wish you'd learn to shut yr fuckin mouth with this shit before a match tho

james milner's done some p flair things in the last few minutes

makes his dogsbodiness all the more infuriating

Tottenham have ended up taking a bit of a belt in the mouth here today, but they’ve been effervescent in attack, and given the borderline nature of a couple of these big decisions, could have easily had more of a reward.

is this a fair lux aeterna entry i dont really understand that thread

the mentality of individual tottenham players ensure that pivotal moments in games tend to go the way of their opponents would be a much more accurate analysis of that pattern of events if viewed over oh idk 20 years

Milner has been superb this season

srsly milner's been looking like the player england's been crying out for all this time. admittedly against 10man spurs. but still. guy's an enigma

his build and honest drayhorse jaw & demeanour have always worked against him imo

v effective winger for newcastle, v attacking midfielder for villa, cast as holding midfielder cos he's big and raw

he's been pushed forward this season

Who does Ben Davies need to blow to get a game btw?

idk but i caught his performance in one of the uefa games and it was noteworthy as the least competent individual performance ive seen (allowing marc wilson) in many years

and i feel essentially that it may have stood against him

Newcastle match delayed until 16:00 because of faulty big screen TV

i mean

i

...

at the stadium or in mike ashley's front room

ban Newcastle

^

vergini's og was a screamer btw

https://vine.co/v/ObmF29uViE1

http://i.imgur.com/gOJ0tQp.gif

7 nil!

8 (EIGHT)

Southampton are fucked

haaa

15 mil for Welbeck? What a crazy world we live in..

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/B0Pus9UIAAA3Ji_.jpg

sunderland's other og was also fantastic

Southampton still a big club?

Oh, Dusan. You make my heart go funny.

he and Pelle make an attractive pair

Amazing finish from Vergini.

That's probably the worst defensive performance I've ever seen in the Premiership and I'm including Ipswich and Wigan in that.

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/B0Pus9UIAAA3Ji_.jpg

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/0/04/So_happy_smiling_cat.jpg

christ, Liverpool are bad

think today is the day the myth of Mario Balotelli dies forever

wow Balotelli

erm just realised my stream is like 10 minutes lagged

uh, holy shit

hahaha what the fuck

lol clown shoes football there

following this on BBC live text is fairly amusing

fuck's sake

Balotelli still managed to get one more fuck up in before the end too

A weekend of hilarious own goals

can i get away with an oh rangerspaws

silly sods but pleasant to have had something supportable again at least

dismayed by redknapp's typically egocentric & counterproductive postmatch diarrhoea which will probably ensure this was only a false flag much akin to sandro repeatedly teasing the globe his pelvic area

also the fanbase dickheads coating off leroy fer smdh ffs. lil yun's a keeper too

suppose tbf however crap they were lfc owed us that one after the mackie game

I think this sums it up

https://i.imgur.com/d9r3ICY.jpg

deep irony of redknapp's bizarre random cunt rant about taarabt is that he himself is v much the adel of managers

ya i kinda wondered how that wasnt a penalty tbh

secret diff rules in the box even allowing for melees. no one ever got done for high foot scoring an o/h kick there either

oh bollox it's villa for us next. 1-3 loss, high-strung hooped hysteria while we get patiently knobbed by routine microwave meat & potatoes

you're both needed on the Balotelli thread

no doubt but ive nothing to add on my last post. and rtc has already given his definitive opinion too iirc from reading it again today

alos i have two assignments due tonight and if im to waste that because i was reading about shocking performances i'm currently finding lj's online dating stories somewhat more compelling what what

Michael Oliver so far ahead of all the other English refs it's not funny btw

― pretentious over rated bloody old rubbish (imago), Saturday, September 27, 2014 5:56 PM (3 weeks ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

feel that today was an important day in Michael Oliver's career. every ref has this day. it is about how the ref responds

berahino is class

best english finisher rn

utd almost almost looking good now. so vulnerable at the back tho

yeah they are getting a bit snappier with their passing, look much less fragmented

BPL this past week has been great fun. Loved the showing from QPR and West Brom in particular.

(Btw I had a feeling Vargas would break out, after seeing him score two for Chile vs Peru ten days ago ).

yeah he is cool i respect his jumpman tatt

"a pugnacious, muscular ball of testosterone and goal threat" goes the cliche-south-american-but-nevertheless-otm descrip of him i read today

isla otoh not on the shitlist just yet but bit of a tedious curio all the same

one of those you can only really accurately describe with the suitably unimaginative "right sided midfielder" (rather than wingback as advertised) as he's not a good defender and is okayish in attack without excelling at anything in partic other than linear sentinel stamina

life would be too short to compile such creatures but maybe brett emerton comes to mind

providing he can stop backheeling it directly to opposition forwards he can still grow in my affections if he continues thus, would be nice if he maybe kicked someone 6ft in the air and called them a cabron or something idk

yerman. was at Sunderland there for a while?

dean marney started off that way. feel like milner has betrayed the position by continuously showing flair above and beyond.

ghali, he was another.

Oh fuck off Redknapp. The great man manager now admits Adel isn't three stone overweight. But apparently it's the wrong kind of weight loss, and Arry is the only friend Adel's ever had. With friends like that …