US Politics December 2018: ~very legal and very cool~

apparently someone died?

not the right one.

not the right quantity

all the new memes are tedious and unfunny we need someone bad to die

— Brandy Jensen (@BrandyLJensen) November 27, 2018

very legal

and very cool

This got a hair lost last night in the wake of Bush's passing, but turns out Cohen wasn't done yet:

BREAKING / NBC NEWS: Michael Cohen's attorneys have told a judge tonight that their client is cooperating in an ongoing federal investigation in New York and he has met with the New York AG's office about their suit against the Trump Foundation and the President.

— Tom Winter (@Tom_Winter) December 1, 2018

FRIDAY NIGHT NEWS DUMP:

Michael Cohen's legal team just released his 33-page sentencing submission seeking a time served sentence for "voluntarily" cooperating with the Mueller probe. There are 37 exhibits.

Here's a snippet from the memo. pic.twitter.com/d4TVEUz6YV

— Adam Klasfeld (@KlasfeldReports) December 1, 2018

More on what that all means:

https://www.thedailybeast.com/cohen-trump-knew-i-called-kremlin-for-help-with-trump-tower-moscow

Also one of several pieces on the fairly obvious re Nunes' culpability and resultant unintended consequences. Though it slightly underscores that this may be a long month:

https://slate.com/news-and-politics/2018/11/michael-cohen-lying-to-congress-plea-deal-devin-nunes.html

time served

https://www.documentcloud.org/documents/5348235-Cohen-sentencing-memo.html?fbclid=IwAR0mN8Hi9SVEGiKuBwCNBFunrHeEgYISBRPP6eMifvwEANOMYucXuS_d8Wk

good thread title

The thread title was a no brainer but the tildes add a little flair, kudos

you know i do what i can

The North Carolina stuff is *nuts*:

It seems a Republican campaign went to the houses of older Democrats, claimed to be officials, took their absentee ballots and got rid of them. The Republican “won” by 900 votes. It’s 2018. Every major newspaper should be on that story. #NC9

— Neera Tanden (@neeratanden) December 1, 2018

xp i’m a huge tilde-as-em dash fan, and through my ilx fandom, i incorporated (mis-incorporated?) it into my personal board correspondence style. first i’ve been aware of the fingerprints but i’m comforted by the idea that i swiped from the best.

i guess its less of a dash than an intensifier in many of my applications. still tho.

Per these observations, Trump resolved nothing with China aside from no immediate tariff escalation:

Again, unless there's more here than meets the eye, this is hardly the predicted "cave" by Xi begging for mercy for US trade pressure. Not even close. Buying farm goods for tariff time-out is basically status-quo-ante, which is what China wants.

— Patrick Chovanec (@prchovanec) December 2, 2018

Cannot be emphasized enough: this is not a deal and it is not a resolution. This is an agreement to delay further escalation. Neither side really gave anything except some cotton candy sweeteners. Nothing fundamental. Maybe be happy escalation had been delayed

— Interpol CEO Balding (@BaldingsWorld) December 2, 2018

And now there's this

BREAKING: Trump says he'll be 'formally terminating NAFTA,' says Congress will have choice between replacement or nothing

— The Associated Press (@AP) December 2, 2018

his trademark negotiation style: take a hostage

"Russia is building up its land forces and weapons along the border, Ukraine’s president said Saturday"

¯\_(ツ)_/¯

https://apnews.com/201537791dc8404496eb4d9f5bd4d387

very legal & very cool

Got to admit, of all the brazen dickheadedness Russia has been up to, I really don't understand what the endgame in Ukraine is.

https://www.nbcnews.com/storyline/ukraine-crisis/seven-reasons-why-russia-wants-keep-ukraine-all-itself-n33391

ok, i understand this is not likely, but can we all agree that there is a NON-ZERO probability, maybe even as high as 0.001%, that one endgame for all of this is Trump being installed as the new President of Ukraine, with the pardoned Manafort as his Chief of Staff

he would probably love that.

xpost That article is 4 years old. Do its arguments still stand?

Speaking at a Ukrainian military event, President Petro Poroshenko said Russia has deployed “more than 80,000 troops, 1,400 artillery and multiple rocket launch systems, 900 tanks, 2,300 armored combat vehicles, 500 aircraft and 300 helicopters” along their common border.

These numbers, which have not been verified, would account for the vast majority of men and hardware assigned to Russia’s Western Military District.

Maybe Russia is worried Ukraine might invade?

I mean invading Russia in the winter what could go wrong?

Not if Ukraine brings the heat!

lock yulia tymoshenko up!

xpost That article is 4 years old. Do its arguments still stand?

― Josh in Chicago, Sunday, December 2, 2018 11:35 AM (twenty minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

short version: yes
long version: yessssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss

ok, so let's see where all the dumbass statements and stances vs actual policies and actions lead us, from the US side of things

- trump consistently attacks NATO. not just the amount of money NATO members spend on it, but also the idea of NATO itself. he sees it as a transactional thing, and doesn't think the US is getting enough out of its investment
- he also likes to refer to NATO members as "so-called allies", and to argue that they don't care about us, and that they rip us off, etc
- beyond all the bluster and the stupidity of his tweets, the US has actually increased funding and support for NATO
- he blames the last russian annexation of Crimea on Obama. not putin for doing it, but obama for "letting it happen"
- putin seems to own him

???

It sounds like our president is an idiot.

i think it's this mess of contradictions that leads me to the 0.003% scenario where putin fully invades ukraine, trump issues some weirdass tweet/ "press statement" saying that the US refuses to help NATO, the entire world yells at trump, confusion ensues, and then there's iconic CNN footage of trump trying taking off on a private plane toward russia and everyone's just like "fuck it, let him leave"

Trump's constant flak aimed at NATO is probably just playing to his know-nothing base, the same who lapped up the birther nonsense. Such people probably think of NATO countries as filled with uppity wine-drinking snobs who laugh at rural America and should be taken down several pegs, because we are the greatest nation on earth and they are a bunch of has-beens who be speaking Russian if we hadn't saved them.

It sounds like our president is an idiot.

― Newsted joins this band and quickly he’s subdued (Leee), Sunday, December 2, 2018 12:08 PM (seventeen minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Yeah otm have to admit I'm starting to have some concerns about Trump

of course it plays well the base, all you have to do is go "europeans are like THIS!" and do the 'hold your pinky up while you drink tea' gesture. but trump has been consistently attacking "allies" for decades now, since the mid-80s at least. whoever is a putative ally is also a competitor in his mind, because he sees international trade as a contest, and you trade with your allies

it's like

https://i.imgur.com/NtWm2lX.jpg
LET'S RUN THE GOVERNMENT LIKE A BUSINESS!

only if you didn't know how businesses are run

Having just returned from a trip to Oslo, I gotta say the absolute worst thing about traveling is having to come back to America when you're done.

yeah i just finished watching all of the swedish 'girl w/ dragon tattoo' and i feel the same way

we need to make america great again guys

are there any tax returns you'd suggest looking at in order to make that happen

Aimless otm; he wouldn't give a shit about NATO one way or the other if it weren't a MAGAnaut rally applause line.

Actually not sure. The Black Helicopter crowd is obviously part of his base. But obviously there's reason to believe something else is up too.

idk -- he does seem to resent money being spent on things, like nato, that don't immediately enrich him personally, and he clearly has no broader grasp of geopolitics or long-term strategy in general. i think he'd be against nato even if it weren't an applause line

any money not spent by the *job creators* (peace be unto them) is an affront to jesus

Got to admit, of all the brazen dickheadedness Russia has been up to, I really don't understand what the endgame in Ukraine is.

Not all of those reasons still hold up but the idea that Russia wants to maintain a sphere of influence and not be surrounded to the West by NATO does, as does the broader idea that they have an obligation to protect Russians and Russian-speakers within Ukraine. Another major factor is that it is a relatively popular distraction from domestic issues (primarily the increase in pension age, which has seen Putin’s approval rating dip significantly).

It’s worth noting that Poroshenko is playing the same game, though. There isn’t any evidence Russia is particularly up to anything new - over and above the incident in the Kerch Straight - and Poroshenko’s implementation of martial law, the ban on Russian nationals entering Ukraine, hyping up the threat of ground invasion, etc, has much more to do with the fact that an election campaign kicks off this month and he is currently polling 8%. The original martial law proposal would have run for twice as long and potentially delayed the election - but it was rejected by members of his own coalition.

8% is pretty rough

Remembering the murder of 4 US churchwomen in El Salvador, 12/2 1980. And what US officials said: UN Amb. Jean Kirkpatrick: “The nuns were not just nuns, [they] were also political activists on behalf of the Frente. We ought to be more clear-cut about this than we usually are.” pic.twitter.com/CCEWFmloKV

— Robert Ellsberg (@RobertEllsberg) December 2, 2018

“I think that there are a lot of reasons people became Trump voters,” said Springsteen to the Sunday Times Magazine of London. “You had severe blows to working people in the 1970s and 1980s as all the steel mills shut down. Then you had an explosion of information technology. These are life-changing, upsetting occurrences.”

So far, a second term for Trump looks likely to Springsteen. “I don’t see anyone out there at the moment,” said Springsteen of the 2020 election. “The man who can beat Trump, or the woman who can beat Trump. You need someone who can speak some of the same language (as Trump) and the Democrats don’t have an obvious, effective presidential candidate.”

https://www.app.com/story/entertainment/music/2018/12/03/bruce-springsteen-donald-trump-voters-feel-your-pain/2189165002/

he's running

prefer him to Harris or Booker

still feel like Hillary was the one person Trump could've conceivably beaten, given her sky-high negatives and the fact that she's been a GOP villain for over two decades. and even then he still got 3 million less votes.

i'd take president springsteen tbh, if only to watch chris christie's reaction

Max Weinberg

feelin' extremely not guilty this morning

“Michael Cohen asks judge for no Prison Time.” You mean he can do all of the TERRIBLE, unrelated to Trump, things having to do with fraud, big loans, Taxis, etc., and not serve a long prison term? He makes up stories to get a GREAT & ALREADY reduced deal for himself, and get.....

— Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) December 3, 2018

....his wife and father-in-law (who has the money?) off Scott Free. He lied for this outcome and should, in my opinion, serve a full and complete sentence.

— Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) December 3, 2018

“I will never testify against Trump.” This statement was recently made by Roger Stone, essentially stating that he will not be forced by a rogue and out of control prosecutor to make up lies and stories about “President Trump.” Nice to know that some people still have “guts!”

— Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) December 3, 2018

Bob Mueller (who is a much different man than people think) and his out of control band of Angry Democrats, don’t want the truth, they only want lies. The truth is very bad for their mission!

— Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) December 3, 2018

(scrolls by without reading)

You mean he can do all of the TERRIBLE, unrelated to Trump, things having to do with fraud, big loans, Taxis, etc., and not serve a long prison term?

man this cohen guy sure is shady, good thing he kept his nose meticulously clean when working for me, famously law-abiding friend of the mob donald j trump

I like that he's now using quotes like on a restaurant menu board.

Nice to know that some people still have “guts!”

Try Our Pies They're "Great!"

I like the paranthesis where he admits that his yearlong demonization of Mueller has basically not worked. Lol.

xpost lol, was thinking that exact thing.

(scrolls by without reading)

― sleeve, Monday, December 3, 2018 9:09 AM (ten minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

otm

Isn't there a 'flop sweat' emoji that he can liberally sprinkle throughout his tweets? I mean, I guess it's redundant since it's right there in the words he's typing, but still.

You mean he can do all of the TERRIBLE, unrelated to Trump, things having to do with fraud, big loans, Taxis, etc., and not serve a long prison term?

man this cohen guy sure is shady, good thing he kept his nose meticulously clean when working for me, famously law-abiding friend of the mob donald j trump

also national deputy finance chairman of the RNC lol

putting "President Trump" in air quotes is pretty hilarious though

Didn't even notice that little Freudian slip.

does that mean Scott Free is the real president?

Lol @ president springsteen. He would probably crush trump.

if trump is scott free, that would explain how he keeps getting out of impossible situations

https://proxy.duckduckgo.com/iu/?u=http%3A%2F%2Fthecomicbookaddicts.com%2Fwp-content%2Fuploads%2F2018%2F01%2FMister-Miracle-1.jpg&f=1

haha was just thinking of "Scott Free and the Angry Democrats" as a band name

https://lawandcrime.com/high-profile/kellyanne-conways-husband-accuses-trump-of-witness-tampering/

Their hatefucking must be awesome.

best not to think about it

U.S. spent 716 Billion Dollars this year. Crazy.

pres otm

wonder who approved that budget

Rumors flying that Congress set to pass Israel Anti-Boycott Act - designed to punish/prevent differentiation b/w Israel & settlements by quashing free speech.

Likely will also move on Orwellian-named Anti-Semitism Awareness act.

This thread reviews the issues with both.

1/

— Lara Friedman🔥 (@LaraFriedmanDC) December 3, 2018

haven't Republicans done enough to raise awareness of anti-semitism this year?

Mueller filed an indictment just as the President left for https://t.co/8ZNrQ6X29a July he indicted the Russians who will never come here just before he left for Helsinki.Either could have been done earlier or later. Out of control!Supervision please?

— Rudy Giuliani (@RudyGiuliani) November 30, 2018

follow the (inadvertent) link

lol, nice work internet

lol

bhahahaha

Links is tweets hold the same weight in court as a sworn affidavit, right?

online rules

Pay attention to Wisconsin, where the gerrymandered legislative majority is doing its level best to claw away the power of the Democratic governor Wisconsinites just elected

https://www.jsonline.com/story/news/politics/elections/2018/12/03/5-senators-spotlight-opponents-try-stop-lame-duck-bill/2189439002/

Guiuliani's not a well man.

Kimim ° has f

— Rudy Giuliani (@RudyGiuliani) November 30, 2018

TBF he's better at typing than me. I don't know how to that little degree symbol.

I was about to write something about "butt tweeting" but then I realized that it's Rudy Giuliani's butt we'd have been talking about. So I didn't?

i guess he doesn't delete tweets?

press and hold the zero to get the degrees symbol.

First rule of domination is to never apologize

No worries, the white supremacist organization that tweet was directed at knows exactly what it means.

We have covfefe.

this is one of the better US Politics thread titles, just wanna say

Double-LOL in here:

The exact moment when Canada's Prime Minister referred to President Trump as "Donald" in public - something he reportedly hates.

Then, his reaction. pic.twitter.com/ajg32OUyfu

— Muhammad Lila (@MuhammadLila) November 30, 2018

The following post is really funny, too

has somebody veep'd that yet?

i think the most veep-able moment of his presidency so far came when he stranded the argentine president on the podium. i guess people have stopped veep-ing as his presidency has gotten less and less funny.

tfw your mind is too occupied with the work you and jfk jr are doing behind the scenes to expose a paedophile ring among the international elite to focus on signing your name properly

The follow up to that last tweet is even better:

There's more. There were three copies of the new NAFTA deal to sign. During the signing ceremony, President Trump appears to sign in the wrong place on one of them.

This is the exact moment everyone realized, individually with their reactions, including Prime Minister Trudeau. pic.twitter.com/Wd3CEtV73D

— Muhammad Lila (@MuhammadLila) December 3, 2018

Strong story here about why this week looks like it'll be a truly big one.

The Manafort memo on Friday "will be public," Mueller's office tells me, indicating prosecutors will detail for all to read what prosecutors believe the ex-Trump campaign chair lied about. Should be interesting reading. https://t.co/dDQhgDJlh3

— Michael Isikoff (@Isikoff) December 3, 2018

Useful Marcy Wheeler thread on tomorrow's Flynn sentencing

As a strong proponent of the "Bob Mueller makes the most out of his court filings" school, I want to warn that we MIGHT NOT get a lot of juice in Mike Flynn's memo.

I say that for two reasons.

— emptywheel (@emptywheel) December 3, 2018

Now thats some serious ratfucking you done there NC GOP
https://www.washingtonpost.com/politics/north-carolina-election-fraud-investigation-centers-on-operative-with-criminal-history-who-worked-for-gop-congressional-candidate/2018/12/03/7b270a90-f6aa-11e8-8c9a-860ce2a8148f_story.html?utm_term=.89d14b90e684

i think michael cohen is a fascinating figure

it's rare to see someone do this kind of 180. also, it seems like he was being really careful to document the semi-legal stuff he's been doing for trump for years, as if he expected he would need information to protect himself from getting thrown under the bus by trump. seems smart... and yet he spent his career as trump's thuggish "fixer"

the only 'fascinating' thing about him is that he got caught

don't get all starry-eyed treeshy

it's rare to see someone do this kind of 180. also, it seems like he was being really careful to document the semi-legal stuff he's been doing for trump for years, as if he expected he would need information to protect himself from getting thrown under the bus by trump. seems smart... and yet he spent his career as trump's thuggish "fixer"

― Trϵϵship,

what an awful thing to say about Trudeau

It's intersting that one of the Trump toadies I always found the most deeply unlikable flipped so radically but I don't know that I'd call him fascinating. Particularly since it seems like the result of his dad doing some late-stage parenting he really should've undertaken decades earlier.

So...there's a rumor going around that that video of Trump walking away from the president of Argentina, grimacing and muttering "Get me out of here," is in fact footage of Trump literally shitting himself in public.

As people used to say, I WANT TO BELIEVE.

so theres a piss tape and a shit tape

you can never be too careful

"Ukrainian President Petro Poroshenko responded by introducing martial law for 30 days in much of Ukraine. For the duration of martial law, Ukrainian authorities barred entry to all Russian males aged 16 to 60 in a move the Ukrainian leader said was needed to prevent Russia from further destabilizing the country."

https://abcnews.go.com/International/wireStory/ukraine-calls-reservists-amid-tensions-russia-59570234

It's intersting that one of the Trump toadies I always found the most deeply unlikable flipped so radically

― all lite up and very romatic (Old Lunch), Monday, December 3, 2018 10:11 PM (seventeen minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

yeah for sure. remember his threats to the daily beast? he was a true ghoul

he's only fascinating as like a character in a story. not saying i am going to become pen pals with michael cohen.

You totally should, though. He's gonna need some where he's going.

summer camp?

https://cdn-images-1.medium.com/max/1400/1*o6dNQkHFQKj-4y04LfAHww.jpeg

Some of these people look so unwell I wonder how they stay alive.

new board description

they say I walk around
Like I got an S on my chest

If you ever wondered what Henry Winkler looked like pulling a Jeffrey Tambor face...

So President DumDum will be at the Bush funeral, right? I assume he'll be seated with former presidents, like Obama and W and Bill (who will be there with Hillary)? Will this be the first time they've been in the same orbit since his election? Will they shun him? Tell him to fuck himself? Shake his hand? Move seats?

“You can’t sit with us.”

'Hello, DONALD. How are you, DONALD? Very good to see you, DONALD.'

they'll be perfectly civil to him, because civility is more important than anything else in politics iirc

@nbcwashington
Out of respect for the 41st president of the United States, @USPS will suspend regular mail deliveries on Wednesday, Dec. 5

weird

Gonna screw over Amazon and lying Washington Post any way they can ;-)

Uh...wut?

Is this a thing they've done in the past?

I was just at the PO and can confirm. Guess it's another manifestation of the Reagan-Bush contempt for the federal guv'mint.

are the postal workers getting paid for their impromptu day off?

I'm sure like late payment fees etc. will be happily waived on account of Bush funeral mail delays. This should work out fine for everyone.

it's rare to see someone do this kind of 180. also, it seems like he was being really careful to document the semi-legal stuff he's been doing for trump for years, as if he expected he would need information to protect himself from getting thrown under the bus by trump. seems smart... and yet he spent his career as trump's thuggish "fixer"

― Trϵϵship, Tuesday, December 4, 2018 2:58 AM (thirteen hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

what's funny to me is if trump treated cohen with a little bit more than utter contempt and actually repaid his 'loyalty' he wouldn't be in this mess

Yes, as amply demonstrated, Trump creates 99.9% of his own problems.

I'm sure like late payment fees etc. will be happily waived on account of Bush funeral mail delays. This should work out fine for everyone.

― Mom's out working, for fulfillment (Old Lunch), Tuesday, December 4, 2018 4:04 PM (nineteen minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

for real, an unscheduled total shutdown of the USPS is probably going to srsly fuck some people. and for what.

Well, it'll probably just be poor people who don't pay for stuff online like us normals, NBD.

GERRY FORD DIDN'T GET NO POSTAL SHUTDOWN

He got his airport draped in black bunting and a ceremonial fly-over though.

God, I'm just imagining so many needlessly tragic incidents where people living on a razor's edge didn't think to check the USPS Twitter feed before they send out their bills or while they're waiting for some payment or medication they desperately need. Fuck this shit.

If the postal service can assure me that no one will be evicted or go a day without insulin because they shut down, cool, go for it. Otherwise, go die.

https://pixel.nymag.com/imgs/daily/intelligencer/2018/12/03/03-george-bush-donald-trump.w700.h700.jpg

well since you can't think about GHWB without thinking about the post office this seems entirely appropriate

XP GONNA TEAR DC UP

imagine what Bar and Marla Maples talked about over wine

how delicious poor people are?

also grocery checkout scanners will be shut off

how delicious poor people are?

― Οὖτις, Tuesday, December 4, 2018 11:47 AM

too many bones iirc

the tattoos make the skin taste weird

Problems, problems.

BREAKING: House GOP campaign arm @NRCC suffered major hack during heat of 2018 midterm election. w/@BresPolitico https://t.co/HceWShPwmu

— Alex Isenstadt (@politicoalex) December 4, 2018

I'm absolutely certain none of them will accuse the dems of being involved. No chance of that whatsoever.

Allegedly they think it's a 'foreign entity.' Mm.

Meantime, I know you were all waiting with bated breath.

Please see my statement below regarding 2020. pic.twitter.com/ztCfZUY6hA

— Michael Avenatti (@MichaelAvenatti) December 4, 2018

NONONONONONO THIS CAN'T BE HAPPENING NOOOOOOOO

RIP our Joe the Plumber

clearing the way for ORNALDO BLOOMPS

I'll vote for anyone who can take down that elephant thing tbh.

I thought Stormy Daniels was already saying that Avenatti had mis-represented her in a couple of court filings. So I assumed that she was no longer hiring him.

Would he have stood any chance in becoming the nominee?

no

I Avenatti clue

Good:

The incoming House majority leader said Democrats might refuse to seat a North Carolina Republican next year unless and until “substantial” questions about the integrity of his election are resolved.

Rep. Steny H. Hoyer (D-Md.), the current minority whip, made the comments to reporters Tuesday as North Carolina election officials investigate whether an operative hired by Republican candidate Mark Harris illegally collected incomplete ballots from voters.

The probe has delayed the certification of Harris’s narrow victory in North Carolina’s 9th Congressional District, and the state officials could decide to call for a new election. Harris and Democrat Dan McCready are separated by 905 votes, according to unofficial returns.

we are basta point of no return

2020 dystopian grudge match imagination scenario:

SCHUMER V AVENATTI, if you absolutely had to choose, who would you vote for??

Schumer

in a heartbeat

Amazing how much controversy basta bro cooked up within a few months of becoming famous. There is only one other man I can think of that rivals him in this department.

YOU LIFE BURNS FASTER
OBEY YOUR...
BASTA. BASTA.

Palin beats him in that regard

I wonder if we’ll ever learn what the hell happened with the domestic violence incident

All other shit about Trump aside, may we never ever gift another person with the presidency as their first elected position in government. Fuck that noise.

You mean #basta to that noice

Trump warned China "I'm a tariff man"

At least now they know who they're dealing with.

There was one good moment in the woodward book, which you lot yelled at me for reading, in which trump was apopleptic in some meeting with Gary Cohn and he scrawls “trade is bad” on a piece of paper

was it in crayon

Sharpie yo

Thumb dipped in taco bowl grease.

im just mad this jagoff ruined 'basta' for me

if you spell it without the "#" nobody will even think about it

Trump's like Gordon Gekko after he stuck his head under a lawnmower

Today we're going to find out what kind of sentence special counsel Robert Mueller's office thinks former Trump national security adviser Michael Flynn should get for lying to the FBI. While we wait, a thread on how we got here and what to look out for:

— Zoe Tillman (@ZoeTillman) December 4, 2018

It is interesting that within the scope of this investigation the primary national security advisor to the president, who accepted money from a foreign government to act on its behalf and did not disclose it, is among the 'small fish' who'll be let off easy in order to catch bigger fish.

There's lots to this Democratic campaign finance reform strategy, but the most important part is that donations under 50 would be matched 6 to 1 with public money — eg, if you gave https://twitter.com/schwarz/status/10696762090370375695 to Barbara Lee her campaign would get 75 total https://t.co/A8bgDdiOhE by @akela_lacy

— Jon Schwarz (@schwarz) December 3, 2018

Amazing how much controversy basta bro cooked up within a few months of becoming famous. There is only one other man I can think of that rivals him in this department.

― Trϵϵship, Tuesday, December 4, 2018 12:29 PM (one hour ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

6ix9ine

Obviously that was who I was thinking of

7 of 9 was actually a lady borg.

I'm sorry I keep saying this but I really implore you to pay attention to and talk about with your non-Midwestern the foul package the Wisconsin legislature is trying to pass today; they lost the governor's race, the attorney general race, and the statewide popular assembly vote race, but hold a legislative majority thanks to gerrymandered district lines and plan to use it to block the campaign promises the new governor ran on and that Wisconsin voted for. Focusing on the marquee national races and ignoring state legislatures is how we got into this mess.

https://www.jsonline.com/story/news/politics/elections/2018/12/03/5-senators-spotlight-opponents-try-stop-lame-duck-bill/2189439002/

I'm happy it's gotten some topline national attention too.

I have a family member in the state senate up there in WI that I’m pretty sure is supporting that crap. Shameful crybabies.

absolutely delighted to report that it isn't just the USPS that's shutting down tomorrow, it's most of the fed. which means, in my case, that the people that are supposed to be getting my employment package sorted out for a monday start date will be downing tools, and that there's a chance I'll have to wait another month to begin my new job. anyway fuck george bush

Man, it's like a GOP dream come true to fuck the day up for an entire country without even having to be alive to do it.

Meantime, remember this guy?

Steve Bannon will no longer be speaking at a UM, the latest event to be cancelled after the announcement he would be a keynote speaker at a joint conference on sex robots this month. https://t.co/7mqwD26h9H pic.twitter.com/u2i3iC0V81

— Montana Kaimin (@MontanaKaimin) December 4, 2018

“join conference on sex robots”

*joint

Either way, what a terrible world

wow the future is so bright I gotta wear shades

actual lizard person

I assume he's being presented as a tacit argument against sex with humans.

I don't know, man. We're really missing something if we don't hear out the alt-right position on sex robots.

Make Androids Rammable Again

G is for 'rammable' I guess (probably shouldn't've had that fourth martini at lunch)

As a Fed, I got the day off tomorrow for National Day of Mourning George H. W. Bush. I shall spend it posting to ILX. I’m sure that’s what Bush would’ve wanted.

Heyo - https://www.washingtonpost.com/business/economy/attorneys-general-issue-subpoenas-to-trump-entities-in-dc-hotel-case/2018/12/04/29e13dc0-f4db-11e8-bc79-68604ed88993_story.html?utm_term=.6e287ccbcc15

it's beginning to look a lot like Christmas

I thought they were delaying shutdown due to Bush death

The agency’s attorneys again asked Messitte for a stay Friday, in the hope that the U.S. Court of Appeals for the 4th Circuit would intervene.

so is this gonna go to the SC?

WHERE THE HELL'S MY FLYNN SENTENCING MEMO?!

Note to eager journalists and court-followers:

One of the primary benefits of federal practice with PACER is that you e-file your brief any time you want, up to 11:59 p.m. on the due date if you like living on the edge.

Season your anticipation accordingly.

— ScottFreeHat (@Popehat) December 4, 2018

NOOOOOOOOOOOO

https://abcnews.go.com/Politics/cia-director-briefs-small-group-senators-saudi-crown/story?id=59598135

Lede:

Following a briefing by CIA director Gina Haspel Tuesday on the murder of Washington Post columnist Jamal Khashoggi, leading Republican senators told reporters that there was "zero question" that Saudi Crown Prince Mohammed bin Salman ordered the brutal murder.

doesn't matter, tbh

this is exactly the kind of thing "serious" Senators love, the opportunity to do some self-righteous moral grandstanding for the cameras that they know has no hope of affecting any kind of actual outcome, legislative or otherwise

as a former intellectual property paralegal I've filed like 30 briefs at 11:58 at night and it fucking sucks

Following a briefing by CIA director Gina Haspel Tuesday on the murder of Washington Post columnist Jamal Khashoggi, leading Republican senators told reporters that there was "zero question" that Saudi Crown Prince Mohammed bin Salman ordered the brutal murder.

have these senators heard that MBS completely denies it, though? completely denies! so it will be impossible to ever find out the truth.

this may come as a shock, but a great deal of what happens in politics and otherwise actually really "doesn't matter" and doesn't make a difference, and is just grandstanding on a major or very minor scale

and yet we talk about it, because it's a thread for talking about these things, not just the most important events that are the hinges upon which the future turns

true

Also: it's 4:25 p.m. EST and almost happy hour

I, too, love christmas surprises

Hi, today the yield curve inverted. This means the interest rates on longer term bonds are now lower than those on short term bonds ( basically, you make less money on a longer term bet)

Here's an article reassuring you why this isn't a big deal (from November 2006)

— 🏴Captain Nuance 🇵🇸🇮🇷 and 420 others (@bluegrass_red) December 4, 2018

https://t.co/sC0n8F0wAm

— 🏴Captain Nuance 🇵🇸🇮🇷 and 420 others (@bluegrass_red) December 4, 2018

subprime mortgage market starting collapsing 3 months later...https://t.co/oRwGzvnARO

— 🏴Captain Nuance 🇵🇸🇮🇷 and 420 others (@bluegrass_red) December 4, 2018

wait, am i supposed to be concerned that the motley fool was wrong, or am i supposed to believe captain nuance and 420 others

Yeah, what am I supposed to be concerned about?

He's arguing this may portend another crash and the '06 op-ed was myopic.

I suppose if one predicts a correction and/or crash it will eventually happen, esp. since it hasn't happened for a while, but I suppose that is a more specific warning.

kind of comprehensible explainer

https://www.bloomberg.com/opinion/articles/2018-12-03/u-s-yield-curve-just-inverted-that-s-huge

i don't think anyone predicting a recession next year is out on a limb at this point

not quite a canary in the coal mine.. article I read said something like 'a recession has followed within 6-24 months'

When were folks first talking about an inversion curve? A year ago? A quick google found some predictions Dec. 2017 that the inversion curve could arrive in the next year, and another article from the previous summer that predicted it by the end of that year, 2017. So I suppose people have been seeing this coming for at least a year and a half. And now it's year, and a recession could be another 2 years off. Or sooner. Who knows? It's about time, probably.

not quite a canary in the coal mine.. article I read said something like 'a recession has followed within 6-24 months'

― officer sonny bonds, lytton pd (mayor jingleberries), Tuesday, December 4, 2018 9:48 PM (twelve minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

pal of mine today said 'so this means we can expect a recession sometime between this year and the heat death of the sun'

you can bank on it.

Hrm.

NEW: DOJ inspector general's office released a report finding a now-former senior DOJ official sexually assaulted and sexually harassed women working for him — no criminal prosecution, the official retired, he isn't named https://t.co/34C5yg55om pic.twitter.com/Llc5SvVm4W

— Zoe Tillman (@ZoeTillman) December 4, 2018

Stone took the fifth?

Is that pretty much an admission of guilt?

Can't testify because it would be self incrimination?

An admission of guilt, yes. But, crucially, it is not evidence of guilt.

p sure Mueller has evidence of his guilt at this point

evidence of guilt doesn't mean it will win in court or even get an indictment

YALL LAWYERS HUH

oh no, the poor staff at weekly standard!!

The fate of The Weekly Standard, the conservative magazine that has staked out a position as a publication on the right still critical of President Donald Trump, is uncertain, Editor-in-Chief Stephen Hayes told staff in a series of phone calls Tuesday, according to two people familiar with the matter.

The magazine's precarious position comes after its leadership spent months searching for a buyer, the people told CNN.

The people explained that The Weekly Standard's leadership had butted heads with MediaDC, the current publisher of the magazine, and that the two parties had agreed to allow Hayes to search for a new owner.

However, MediaDC recently informed The Weekly Standard's leadership that the company was no longer interested in a sale, the people said.

Instead, Ryan McKibben, the chairman of MediaDC, asked to meet with Hayes in a meeting tentatively scheduled for late next week, the people said. McKibben, they said, also requested the entire staff of The Weekly Standard be made available following the meeting.

CNN saying Flynn report within the hour.

They also said Don Jr would be indicted two weeks ago.

In this case, the report has to come out by the end of the day, so.

Yes, yes, yes.

why would anything come out now, surely most feds knocked off hours ago for the free day off tomorrow

Precisely. (Per a tweet I linked above, it can be filed into PACER at any point during the day.)

So where is this Flynn shit? Is there perhaps a behind the scenes legal challenge to its release?

Filing has arrived!

Mueller on Flynn: "Given the defendant’s substantial assistance and other considerations set
forth below, a sentence at the low end of the guideline range—including a sentence that does not impose a term of incarceration—is appropriate and warranted."

Flynn memo drops (for real) as @renato_mariotti and I are recording his podcast. Main memo: 7 pages. Portion about cooperation: 6 pages, heavily redacted.

— ScottFreeHat (@Popehat) December 5, 2018

This fits with what Marcy Wheeler and others were figuring -- not much detail, redaction due to a lot more going on involving others.

https://www.courtlistener.com/recap/gov.uscourts.dcd.191592/gov.uscourts.dcd.191592.46.0.pdf

Does not seem to be redacted?

Oh, I see:

Because the Addendum includes sensitive information about ongoing investigations, the government is seeking to partially seal the Addendum, and has filed publicly a redacted version of the document that excludes the sensitive information.

General detail

https://www.buzzfeednews.com/article/zoetillman/michael-flynn-robert-mueller-fbi-sentencing-prison

Redacted addendum:

https://www.documentcloud.org/documents/5425878-Gov-Uscourts-Dcd-191592-46-1-2.html

Lmao

pomo american flag vibes pic.twitter.com/Ibp2VNlHBJ

— Derek Thompson (@DKThomp) December 5, 2018

Trump's gonna be like "no jail time, see, Flynnocent!"

Looks like Flynn aided three investigations: REDACTED criminal investigation, the Mueller probe and REDACTED. Even the subject header of the third is redacted in the full document. pic.twitter.com/nvCJKZAFGr

— Philip Bump (@pbump) December 5, 2018

Oh. Oh my. https://t.co/nn6BBW8jiZ pic.twitter.com/tjcsNdTfgP

— Daniel W. Drezner (@dandrezner) December 5, 2018

what's the cliff's notes

"don't lock him up"

Three separate investigations Flynn helped with, he talked a hell of a lot via 19 meetings, Mueller recommending only probation time = Flynn named a lot of names.

My favorite part of all of this has been ashley feinberg constantly monitoring donald trump jr on twitter but she doesn’t seem to do that as much anymore idk. Something so soothing about hate-watching the hapless sons for a sec, like I’d love to see some flynn jr highlights of late but not enough to actually seek him out on social media.

what are the odds--i need numbers--that mueller has found, in looking into all of this stuff, not just to do with "contact with the russians," some crime that trump committed that would people would find legitimately shocking?

ashley feinberg is an american treasure

ashley feinberg is an american treasure

At this point i feel like proof of trump’s erectile dysfunction would make more of a dent among his supporters than an actual homicide coming to light.

If it came out that he was ever with a man (extremely unlikely but you never know) that would take him down for sure.

A horse doesn't seem entirely out of the question.

what are the odds--i need numbers--that mueller has found, in looking into all of this stuff, not just to do with "contact with the russians," some crime that trump committed that would people would find legitimately shocking?

― Trϵϵship, Tuesday, December 4, 2018 6:36 PM (twenty-five minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

9

Meanwhile in Wisconsin, nobody knows what the hell is going on; both Assembly and Senate formally in session, I believe, but they are not in the chamber, nobody knows what's being negotiated, apparently a lot of health care industry lobbyists are floating around and there's some speculation that they're telling the GOP there will be hell to pay if they actually pass their bill saying that every single health care policy change has to be approved by the legislature (this is meant to keep evers from rescinding walker's stepped-up bureaucratic obstacles to Medicaid enrollment but like everything else in this hash of a bill it was not prepared with a lot of attention to detail.)

Original plan was to pass this at about 2am (you can see why!) but we are way behind the posted schedule

we should do a 'most fucked up state politically' poll

I get it now. They're bringing back the coal jobs so they don't run of things that produce black marks for sentencing memo redactions.

did we get the tax returns?!

Yes

Surprisingly they were just several hundred pages of someone's xeroxed butt.

knew it

Rudy Giuliani via text to ⁦@politico⁩ on tonight’s Flynn filing: “Wow big crime for a SPECIAL WHATEVER maybe a group of Angry Bitter Hillary Supporters who are justifying themselves by the goal justifies the means....Over the top In ethical behavior.” pic.twitter.com/5fZhFCNTVV

— Darren Samuelsohn (@dsamuelsohn) December 5, 2018

makes drinking motion

That’s beyond sad.

he's running

from the law

*mimes trump handing phone back to giuliani*

lol

oh look "security expert" Rudy Giuliani shows you how to do a special "dark web scan", courtesy of Experian. pic.twitter.com/8DIlUY56Lu

— Josh Marshall (@joshtpm) April 6, 2018

Mueller = just so fresh, so clean pic.twitter.com/W2jDBpStgx

— Harrison Mooney (@HarrisonMooney) December 5, 2018

I think I'd be willing to sacrifice a limb for the opportunity of watching Giuliani defend Trump on federal charges. Like just a regular ol' televised trial. I'm certain that it would be a breathtaking spectacle.

i imagine one could overhear a reasonable facsimile of rudy's defence at any time just by visiting any american geriatric living facility

I knew I'd heard a variation of that Rudy text somewhere before.

free paul manafort!

Did people wind up suing U2 after they imposed their free lp on everybody using i-tunes or whatever.
Just wondering what recourse you might have if you bought something & got a free Paul Manafort. Do you just shed it with the other surplus packaging as you leave the shop?

edge-y!

good morning!

and i hope a good day. last time soetero spoke with mr. trump in the audience was the 2011 white house correspondence dinner iirc and look what happened

our big wet boy is excited about his field trip

Looking forward to being with the Bush family. This is not a funeral, this is a day of celebration for a great man who has led a long and distinguished life. He will be missed!

— Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) December 5, 2018

pretty sure it is in fact a funeral

another falsehood from president lies!!!

FPed you for using "wet" in connection with Drumpf

you'd prefer 'moist'?

humid 'n' tumid

as a scientist, i can say that when i observe these two fragments in such proximity -

Looking forward to being with the Bush family. This is not a funeral, this is a day of celebration

- it basically means "looking forward to going to Bush's funeral", which he then fixed by making sure to reframe it as a day of celebration

which it is

*cleans glasses*

Can we get a photoshop of Trump inappropriately pumping his fist at Bush's funeral? Or should we just wait for the actual pics?

"That's it, now you've gone too far with your insults! I'll show you ... "
https://pbs.twimg.com/card_img/1070287200590290945/OH56Ow_A?format=jpg&name=600x314

Truly the best thing about twitter is it allows the powerful to speak directly to us and thereby demonstrate that 92% of them are addled cretins https://t.co/DKf5NfCr3C

— Jon Schwarz (@schwarz) December 5, 2018

Can we get a photoshop of Trump inappropriately pumping his *redacted* at Bush's funeral?

As unfiltered outlets for hateful propaganda go, Twitter has been very very unfair to President Trump, and it's been very sad to witness the unfairness.

"The same thing-period no space-occured later and it didn't happen"

???

ahahahaha he's talking about that accidental G20 link from a day or two ago

this fuckin guy

ahhh ofcourse, ty! lmao

that's trump's cyber-security adviser rudolph giuliani, he def knows what he's talking about

it's the time magazine reference which is really baffling to me, wtf are his brain worms getting at with that

Yes, Twitter made that happen, not a geriatric using a device/platform he can't quite wrap his mind around.

The same thing occurred later and it didn't happen.

I think the site got taken down, iirc the link no longer works?

haha no i just checked it still works, updated with a link to the flynn stuff and rudy still hasn't deleted the original tweet lmao

NEW: Trump has told aides he doesn’t care about the national debt in part because when it becomes truly untenable he will be out of office. https://t.co/tMJ5k5hiTl

Via @swin24 and @lachlan

— Sam Stein (@samstein) December 5, 2018

DON: Well, yeah.

Lol

TBF, isn't kicking the can down the road like conservatism 101?

W famously told an aide "I'll be gone"

Now you see why he put the city's war room in the World Trade Center? https://t.co/19kKLOMeJ5

— Richard M. Nixon (@dick_nixon) December 5, 2018

Somebody redid the Person of the year Trump cover of Time as Arsehole of the year.
One where he's seated in a cinema chair or whatever. Turning to face you, chair facing away from you.
So i think it's been circulating as a meme.

Ahh, okay. So then the great-grandpas of the world are forwarding it to one another and mistaking it for an actual magazine cover, makes sense.

what is it about boomer brains specifically that has made them so susceptible to crumbling like feta cheese when exposed to social media

> Twitter allowed someone to invade my text with a disgusting anti-President message.

wow, this makes me wonder what kind of security expert he is

Which was Trump's fake Time cover? Was it the original of that one anyway. I just remembered there was some scandal about him having a framed fake Time cover up in a couple of places a couple of years ago.
Would make it funnier possibly if Giuliani hadn't recognised the history of that one.

Trump otm

tbh making anything that looks like a link into a link is a bad design choice that mostly exists to baffle grandpas

I applied for one of those anti-Trump cards but I hear they're harder to get than blue checkmarks

really not looking forward to the MSM slobbering all over Trump cuz he managed to sit through an entire funeral without shitting his big boy pants

oh god totally

he didn't wear his glittery party hat or anything, it's truly the day he becomes presient

DEVELOPING: After election losses, Republicans in Wisconsin Senate push through bill just before sunrise that is designed to empower the GOP-controlled Legislature and weaken the Democrat replacing the outgoing Republican governor; Assembly vote to come. https://t.co/x69Dat25Gu

— NBC News (@NBCNews) December 5, 2018

one last fuck you from scott walker, what a shitheel

fucking disgusting

oh sweet!

In one concession, Republicans backed away from giving the Legislature the power to sidestep the attorney general and appoint their own attorney when state laws are challenged in court. An amendment to do away with that provision was part of a Republican rewrite of the bill, made public around 4:30 a.m. after all-night negotiations.

see, they're willing to reach across the aisle, what's the big deal

Is there a particular address in WI where we can send torches and pitchforks, or are there maybe like drop-off bins at the border?

Can we throw together a covert op to kidnap Scott Walker until the new governor is seated so he can't sign any of this?

if anyone has access to an orbital railgun platform, the address of the governer's mansion is easily googled

IIRC when struck by orbital lasers scott walker will just mutate into a titanic blob of flesh and machinery consuming all social services and human decency in its path

Not to get all 'dewy-eyed naïf' up in this piece, but I don't even know how government can play-act at representing the will of the people when they pull shit like this.

so doc c, you're saying walker was hit by orbital lasers seconds after being elected

cause "The People" exist mainly in their own mind

Here's one of the guys who wrote twitter's code lolling at Rudy:

Hey @tw and @bcherry, remember all the debates we had about the linkifying regex around edge cases like this? Rudy is super upset with us for "https://t.co/3YnF3iGucu"

Rudy, if you don't like it this behavior, put spaces after periods or send patches to https://t.co/CLidW5MrZX https://t.co/btByWkExYF

— Patrick Ewing (@hoverbird) December 5, 2018

I don't even know how government can play-act at representing the will of the people when they pull shit like this.

They don't want to have to play-act, they want to do this stuff under the rug and hope nobody notices. They didn't succeed. Getting the election moved to benefit their supreme court candidate was a big goal and that got killed once people got wind of it. This is dirty as hell but they can't really change the fact that there's going to be a new governor and a new attorney general and a lot of things are going to be fundamentally different around here for the next four years at least. And they are cementing their reputation as the dirty party in the process. I think this is a mistake for them in the long term.

counterpoint: there is no long term

If they ram this through, do the Dems have enough legislative votes to reverse it next year?

i feel like this is exactly the type of move that feels good in the present but will backfire on them

https://thehill.com/policy/finance/419527-exclusive-consumer-bureau-analysis-says-name-change-could-cost-firms-300

tl;dr mick mulvaney wants to change the name of the CFPB to "BCFP". the adminstative burden of this will cost banks $300m. cry me a river, but these administration people are so weird (as well as stupid).

If they ram this through, do the Dems have enough legislative votes to reverse it next year?

No. If that were the case, there would be no point. The idea is that thanks to the current district lines, which among other things fold large chunks of (Democratic) Milwaukee county into hard-red suburban districts, Dems would have to win the statewide vote by 8 points or so in order to get an Assembly majority. That's more than Walker ever won by. The legislature is trying to grab power for itself because it's the only branch of the government that's successfully immunized itself from public anger.
'

xp arbitrarily changing the names of things and other twiddling is an economic stimulus/job creation tactic, surely

it’s a ‘desperately trying to look busy’ tactic, sure

Not much different than corporations reconfiguring initiatives and retitling divisions in order to highlight new executive 'achievements'.

the agency doesn't match the name described in the bill, we need to make it technically correct: the best kind of correct

I posted this elsewhere but might as well ask here as well, any details welcome.

It's so despicable and infuriating that we can declare a national holiday with ~24 hours notice (totally screwing over many thousands of people in the process due to disrupted mail delivery) because a vile mass murderer died, yet Election Day remains a regular workday. I would love more info about this disgusting abuse of power if people can provide details - who signed this order, how did it happen? This has Miller written all over it.

uhhhh... it’s happened every time a president’s died for awhile now.

link?

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/National_day_of_mourning

that doesn't say anything about shutting down the government, just flags at half-mast.

I became a Fed in 2006, so I can’t speak for anything earlier than that, but I got a day off today and when Ford died.

weird, there are zero details about any Ford-related shutdowns here:

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Death_and_state_funeral_of_Gerald_Ford

just another "National Day Of Mourning" with no details...

https://www.washingtonpost.com/archive/politics/1994/04/26/closing-government-for-funeral-is-us-tradition/45935dce-4fe2-4876-953c-d68c02c46802/

Ah thanks, what a bunch of bullshit. My point about Election Day stands, and I can now assume that Trump ordered this directly.

Over the top In ethical behavior

wonder how different today would be if it were jimmy carter who'd died

otm

national new peanut tariff day

Billy Beer suddenly flooding supermarket shelves.

can't wait

billions in new funding for habitat for humanity no wait

(to finally have a Billy Beer, that is, not for Carter do die)

xp

wonder how different today would be if it were jimmy carter who'd died

In all honesty I think Carter will get a similarly loving treatment. He's far enough in the past that it's safe for Republicans to lay off him. If Obama dropped dead tomorrow, on the other hand, Trump would issue an executive order titled "Home at Last" demanding that his body be stuffed in a sack and dropped from a plane over Kenya. And half the country would describe this as "grappling with his predecessor's complicated legacy."

these Nazi rapist pigs wouldn't honor Carter if you held a gun to their heads

(speculation, granted, but I stand by it)

Shakey you just need to find a really old jacket to taste that sweet sweet Billy Beer.

it will be non-stop "malaise" and Iran hostage talk mark my words

Trump will recall the time Carter told that kid not to eat the brown acid

"He wanted us to wear sweaters indoors!"

He's far enough in the past that it's safe for Republicans to lay off him.

Safe, maybe, but they won't.

he will forever be known to anyone to the Right of, well, Carter as the Second Worst President of All Time After the Black One.

Democrats are so used to reflexively hating him that they'll be pressed to find one thing worth salvaging from his presidency. Instead, we'll hear a lot of guff about the "post-presidency" and surviving cancer and "the 120-year love affair between the president and Rosalynn."

Look at the body language. Carter has plague.

https://thehill.com/sites/default/files/styles/thumb_small_article/public/presidents.getty_.jpg?itok=bKYwFxw3

@charles_kinbote
When Carter dies people are still gonna look at the malaise speech as an error of monumental proportions but Carter was right. Our hunger for a paternal west wing style speech that changes everything, except Carter did this and was absolutely crucified for it

@pareene
It was literally the last time an American president ever actually tried to deliver "harsh but necessary truths" to the American people, or whatever cliche the sober pundit class is always pretending they want to hear. Not one has even tried since.

Carter has plague.

You think they're scooching away from him? That is a man fueled by a boundless love of humanity and a seething, remorseless hatred of individual humans, especially his so-called "peers."

they know he has lust in his heart

i know we have google and all but its more fun to ask here and get more creative answers please what is the malaise speech

In 1979 Carter convened a meeting of elites (writers, thinkers, economists) on a mountain, came down off it (really, the jokes write themselves if you're George Will), and deliverd a televised address in which he said we faced a "crisis of confidence" stemming from a decade of assassinations, the Vietnam War, Watergate, and so on. To this day I don't know what the hell was wrong with it other than that Carter is a zero as a public speaker (I remember him balling his fists at one point; he looked like Mark Hamil acting tough).

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0tGd_9Tahzw

https://www.americanrhetoric.com/speeches/jimmycartercrisisofconfidence.htm

What went wrong was that Carter didn't say "USA #1." xp

The whole thing (33 minutes!) is here:

https://millercenter.org/the-presidency/presidential-speeches/july-15-1979-crisis-confidence-speech

I've tried to imagine JFK's 'ask not...' bit being delivered today without the utterer getting pelted with tomatoes, can't do it.

that 'malaise' speech was super popular at the time, but when Carter started firing cabinet members a few weeks later the press marked it as the beginning of the crisis of his presidency

there's a good relentless picnic episode about carter and what his whole deal was

https://content.gallup.com/origin/gallupinc/GallupSpaces/Production/Cms/POLL/bn1a9jq9g0qlldcnggvpea.png

our crisis of confidence....
*balls up fists*
must be transformed into patriotic righteousness https://i.imgur.com/c9yRzgC.jpg?1

I might be interested in a serious biography of Carter. Is there a good one?

One published this year.

This one.

the nascent conservative outrage machine really did a number turning it into the equivalent of 'Dems just hating America i guess'

that's not a bad book Al but it's hard to call it a "serious biography" given that it was written by one of his high level staffers. It's a decent read tho.

I had no idea he was an undersecretary of commerce or whatever. You read it then?

guess Manafort got let out

Moments after a a Pennsylvania man was released from custody, police say he stole a car in the jail's parking lot. https://t.co/sKiHhDfADu #odd

— AP Oddities (@AP_Oddities) December 5, 2018

Yeah read it out of curiosity, a friend of mine in the hood gave it to me.

(hood = neighborhood)

If i had done 1/10th of what she did .....
& he's not getting time?

Cheerleader for jailtime for non-criminals not getting time seems a little unjust surely?

don't let us down, Philly

Politico reports:

President Donald Trump will attend the Army-Navy football game Saturday in Philadelphia, the White House told reporters on Wednesday.

Trump attended the game between the two military academies in 2016 as president-elect. He tweeted in 2017 that he would watch the game remotely, thanking the two branches for their service. President Barack Obama attended the game in 2011.

Sitting presidents have routinely made appearances at the games, and they traditionally switch sides of the field at halftime.

as long as hillary is free, all of us are in chains. Xp

psyched to see trump get pelted with batteries tbh

He should parachute in!

Just like he trained for in Vietohwait.

https://proxy.duckduckgo.com/iu/?u=https%3A%2F%2Fi.amz.mshcdn.com%2Fw1Ihe3Wef7CJxbYqjnfu0Dg7Wmo%3D%2Ffit-in%2F1200x9600%2Fhttps%253A%252F%252Fblueprint-api-production.s3.amazonaws.com%252Fuploads%252Fcard%252Fimage%252F429620%252Fc7e9fa99-ad33-4948-8bd6-d2c7168c9fac.jpg&f=1

i bet one of the only things trump is good at is farting

one might say it's his manaforte

Dems' national lead in House votes just surpassed 9.7 million (now 8.6%). Largest midterm raw vote margin ever; largest % margin since 1986. https://t.co/0pm7oW1pFE

— Dave Wasserman (@Redistrict) December 6, 2018

I really don't care one way or the other if someone says or doesn't say a prayer at a funeral, but imagine the avalanche of "He's a Muslim!" shit we'd have to sit through if Obama had been the one to not recite the Apostles' Creed during a Presidential Funeral.

Carter's lite Reaganism is too depressing to write an entire book about.

Good retiree, though.

I lo ove satan

Oops rong thred

Satan is pretty fucking cool I admit. My watching of 5 episodes of the new Sabrina have convinced me.

A suprisingly thorough story, given the source, about how Bill Nelson lost just enough Hispanic voters.. Worth the read.

Twice I flipped channels to NPR today, and both times weren't they just yammering on about how ex-presidential deaths do wonders to the unite the country. This struck me as some bullshit. But is it historically true? Even if so, isn't it a little farfetched in 2018?

it unites the ruling class

I'm literally vomiting with rage imagining A) all the fawning headlines that'll be run when Trump dies and B) Obama's inevitable "now he and I have had some differences *pause for light laughter*, but..." speech

on the plus side that fucker will be dead

It made me pukey too

If the ruling class includes the legislative and executive branches, then I'm not holding my breath for unity. In fact, I can't imagine unity would be a good thing while half the people in power are basically cartoon villains.

With any luck we won't have to wait long for Trump's own giant waste of federal money.

Couldn't we bury him now and save time and stress about fitting it in later?

it unites the ruling class

the only people who count

(or get counted)

Dump Pence!

https://www.vanityfair.com/news/2018/12/mike-pence-2020-mueller-trump

I thought Pence was a Milquetoast with a poor reputation that would only have been picked by Trump in the first place so would be unlikely to be much of an anything if standing on his own in a Presidential race

well, good morning!

“Look at how he’s been. It’s presidential,” a former West Wing aide said.

the standards, they are low

Technically speaking, it's accurate. Incoherently rage tweeting on the shitter is now presidential.

wtf i'm presidential now

If he's permanently stained the diginity of the Presidentship do you need a revolution? Rebranding of positions etc?

jfc I hate to say it but the Dems could stand to learn something here

Wisconsin Republicans approved 82 Scott Walker appointees yesterday. 82 PEOPLE IN 1 DAY. https://t.co/unx6L4gxku

— Amanda Terkel (@aterkel) December 5, 2018

republicans understand how to use power, that's for sure

Basically GOP seems to understand better to risk (or even accept) defeat in a few years for the sake of victory now. Laws and judges last longer than election cycles.

beardo ted cruz is continuing to happen and somehow covering up that gelatinous face a bit is somehow worse than keeping it exposed and glistening

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/Dtrtgb3WsAUGrru.jpg:large

goddamn it

Thank goodness I had progressed past the adolescent chin pube phase before that shit started going gray. What an indignity.

I hope to god that this isn't in an attempt to court the youthful slacker vote. I don't know if I can handle seeing Cruz go full Poochie.

On his way to Orson’s Fat Period

https://dwigif.com/view/y4TXpWi

Orson Whelps

This is very illuminating and makes me think these idiots are truly doomed.

https://www.theatlantic.com/politics/archive/2018/12/trump-white-house-has-no-plan-counter-mueller-report/577417/

Attempting to plan “would mean you would have to have an honest conversation about what might be coming,”

i figured this would be the main problem. no one on team trump is going to be able to plan any kind of effective legal strategy because no one is going to want to be honest about what actually, or likely happened.

My favorite bit:

Giuliani initially pushed back on the prediction that Trump would take center stage after the report drops. “I don’t think following his lead is the right thing. He’s the client,” he told me. “The more controlled a person is, the more intelligent they are, the more they can make the decision. But he’s just like every other client. He’s not more … you know, controlled than any other client. In fact, he’s a little less.”

Plus just in a general sense it means accepting reality without deflecting facts with unhinged conspiracy theories and outright lies. I'm not sure they're capable.

which works for the base – but what the base thinks isn't going to keep that POS out of prison.

The president has also devoted much of his energy to following Paul Manafort’s case rather than prepping for the full report. “The thing that upsets POTUS the most is the treatment of Manafort,” Giuliani said. When Trump learned that the former campaign chairman was in solitary confinement, Giuliani said, “he said to me, ‘Don’t they realize we’re America?’”

trump: we're probably gonna massacre refugees at the border fyi
also trump: they're making paul manafort sit on his own in prison, this is unconscionable

“He’s got a great memory,” Giuliani said. “However, basically we were answering questions about 2016, the busiest year of his life. It’s a real job to remember.”

yes who could possibly remember the events of 2016

tbf we're all trying to forget

As if every nanosecond of Trump's life hasn't been meticulously documented over the past two years.

feel like "tweets don't fail me now" might be a good January thread title

by the foreign powers who have tapped his unsecured personal phone xp

Asked whether the White House had a plan in place for when Mueller closes in, the spokesman Hogan Gidley declined to comment.

Hogan Gidley! Add that one to the list of awesome names in this epic satirical novel.

what happened in Wisconsin, even the slightly watered down version that passed, was some buuuuullshit, and people like tammy baldwin need to speak out more forcefully about it than this:

“I do believe that the legislature is overreaching and really just disrespecting the voters of my state,” the senator said.

She added later, referring to House Speaker Paul Ryan (R-WI), who is retiring from that chamber soon: “I hope that Speaker Ryan is still as invested as he ever was in the success of Wisconsin, so I think he absolutely should speak up about this.”

yeah! that'll show them!

?!?!?!!??!!

btw they're doing this in michigan now, too

WI and MI voted for Trump. This is their reward.

GOP is basically a stalker now

yum!

https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-g5xZgnRvBqQ/XAXHcUdZjVI/AAAAAAABA1o/NFQuXZMIzLQeBb90HvEoQPA0iT5F8QO6gCLcBGAs/s1600/2012-02-15-Banana_Republican_0203-thumb.jpg

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former AG Barr as new Trump AG...?

as in Roseanne?

Secretary of Agriculture Dan Connor.

I honestly don't remember Barr at all from his first time around.

I remember him vaguely; I have trouble distinguishing the Poppy appointees from the late Reagan-era ones like Dick Thornburgh.

how delightful:

Barr's two-day confirmation hearing was "unusually placid" and he received a good reception from both Republicans and Democrats on the Senate Judiciary Committee.[8] Asked whether he thought a constitutional right to privacy included the right to an abortion, Barr responded that he believed the constitution was not originally intended to create a right to abortion; that Roe v. Wade was thus wrongly decided; and that abortion should be a "legitimate issue for state legislators".[8] Committee Chairman, Senator Joe Biden, though disagreeing with Barr, responded that it was the "first candid answer" he had heard from a nominee on a question that witnesses would normally evade.[9] Barr was approved unanimously by the Senate Judiciary Committee. Chairman Biden hailed Barr as "a throwback to the days when we actually had attorneys general that would talk to you."[9]

The media described Barr as staunchly conservative.[10] The New York Times described the "central theme" of his tenure to be: "his contention that violent crime can be reduced only by expanding Federal and state prisons to jail habitual violent offenders."[10] At the same time, reporters consistently described Barr as affable with a dry, self-deprecating wit.[1

seems like he wouldn't fire mueller? i think a draconian, law-and-order reaganite is probably on the higher end of what we could hope for in a trump AG

yup

not quite a dyed-in-the-wool racist keelber elf or totally unqualified lickspittle

(still bad, obviously)

Also: I assume Barr and Mueller are colleagues and contemporaries.

it doesn't matter who the AG is now re: Mueller imo. With the Dems in Congress and all the court filings and cases in motion, his stuff will come out even if he was summarily fired right this minute

yeah the time to fire Mueller was 10 minutes after he was appointed

Did some digging re Barr and Mueller and found this very interesting little tidbit from Chase Untermeyer's published diaries being in GHWB's White House:

https://books.google.com/books?id=lBZDDQAAQBAJ&pg=PA139&lpg=PA139&dq=%22bill+barr%22+mueller&source=bl&ots=rZtNkWb2Ts&sig=9HakJ6dCVDSeNUifwL3-qbNplAc&hl=en&sa=X&ved=2ahUKEwiJhO6b8YvfAhXBwMQHHViwCII4ChDoATACegQIBhAB#v=onepage&q=%22bill%20barr%22%20mueller&f=false

"an intensely handsome fellow"

"intensely handsome"!

Seeing names like Robert Novak seared my retinas.

no wonder Comey wanted to hug and kiss him so much

https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/thumb/5/54/Rough_Boys.jpg/220px-Rough_Boys.jpg

Wonder who Barr wanted instead. Doesn't mean they didn't get along later.

gonna check my uni library for these diaries!

I do love this bit from Untermeyer's Wikipedia entry:

Untermeyer is the author of When Things Went Right: The Dawn of the Reagan-Bush Administration, a memoir of the opening two years of the Reagan Administration; Inside Reagan's Navy: The Pentagon Journals, describing his service at the Navy Department; and How Important People Act: Behaving Yourself in Public.

His website has more fun re that last point. I presume our current president was not a client.

In an informal and fun atmosphere, Ambassador Chase Untermeyer shares valuable tips and techniques on how to act in public. These include how to make conversation with total strangers at a reception or banquet; how to sit on stage; how to give a talk; how to attend a funeral or other solemn occasion; how to take a tour; how to run a meeting; how to deal with the press; and how best to represent your company or firm in another country and culture.

Unlike professional training programs on “motivation” and “leadership” that speak in generalities, the “How Important People Act” seminar arms you with dozens of very practical things you can start using immediately to act with confidence and competence in public

dying @ this

he's like the Henry Higgins of Important People

"Why Can't The Americans Learn to Sit?"

I also appreciate that if you go to his site, you'll find you can choose from his resume, his very short bio, his short bio or his full bio. Or his wife.

"How to Sit on Your Wife -- And Asking Her Permission!"

"How To Be Buried."

This is the world Ross Douthat wants:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B7XIHlAuYvk

BTW you should go back to that diary link just for the attempt at humor between him, Bush and the Gorbachevs, as well as the revelation that the chapter is called "The Case of the Missing Earrings." Why the hell hasn't there been a parody film of this guy yet.

Joy! My library's got it.

I await the blogpost

WI and MI voted for Trump. This is their reward.

― A is for (Aimless), Thursday, December 6, 2018 11:09 AM (four hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

You are full of it if you think the Wisconsin state legislature would be acting one bit differently if Clinton had done 2% better and won here. On the contrary -- if Wisconsin were really "Trump Country" as some people like to think, the legislature here wouldn't be so damn scared of the public.

whoa there are Wisconsin ilxors

where you from exactly

Illinois ain't exactly deep blue (even if it looks that way on paper), but the only place I've seen actual Trump signs and Republican candidate signs in large numbers has been right outside Milwaukee, between there and Madison.

The entire country is basically the same, rural (red/outer suburbs) and blue (urban areas/inner suburbs)

find the nearest university and walk 20 miles to the left, and you'll find a trump sign

trump is on the far left, claims ilxor dot com poster ‘karl malone’

So...about Bob Barr...

how soon we forget the only actually funny Trump nickname

https://www.businessinsider.com/trump-may-replace-jim-mattis-new-nickname-moderate-dog-2018-9

oops wrong thread

This seems like a bad idea pic.twitter.com/ujwAjBByZo

— Eric Gomez (@EricGomezAsia) December 6, 2018

trump and the republican party regularly 'take hostages' in their domestic legislative negotiations. i guess it stands to reason that they'd start taking real physical hostages

She was arrested in Vancouver BC though... think Trudeau is just gonna give her up to the US?

trudeau should take a hostage before handing over anyone to the US

trade wars are good and easy to win, especially if you convert them into real wars

so thiiiiis is how the apocalypse kicks off, nice

meanwhile, senator elect josh hawley (R-missouri) is now under investigation by MO's (republican) secretary of state. you know it's probably bad if a republican chooses to do their own job at the expense of another republican

https://talkingpointsmemo.com/news/mo-secretary-of-state-launches-probe-of-new-sen-elect-josh-hawley

Glad I got a new person to learn about

Aside from a brief stint at China Construction Bank, the 46-year-old executive has spent her entire career at Huawei. Her brother, Meng Ping, also known as Ren Ping, works at a Huawei subsidiary, and there was speculation that they were being groomed for succession. The Huawei founder reportedly shot that down in a letter to employees in 2013, saying his children lacked the vision, character and ambition to lead the company.

Anyway this is pretty ominous as Huwaei seems to be closely linked to the Chinese government ans has often been accused of espionage

She was arrested in Vancouver BC though... think Trudeau is just gonna give her up to the US?

― Jersey Al (Albert R. Broccoli), Thursday, December 6, 2018 2:47 PM (thirteen minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

she was arrested based on charges in the US, so... yes

still feel like Trudeau should take some sort of hostage

Take our president, please!

McCready officially withdraws his concession in North Carolina House race.

good

FAKE NEWS - THE ENEMY OF THE PEOPLE!

— Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) December 7, 2018

... 30 minutes later ...

Around 10:35pm, a bomb threat was called into the Time Warner Center & the building was evacuated. The threat has not been substantiated at this time; we’re on scene performing a comprehensive sweep-and-search of the facility. We’ll share more info as it becomes available. pic.twitter.com/VtLL2zmilJ

— NYPD NEWS (@NYPDnews) December 7, 2018

CORRECTION: Police responded to a call at 10:07 PM.

— NYPD NEWS (@NYPDnews) December 7, 2018

i guess trump tweeted after he placed the call then

whoa there are Wisconsin ilxors

lol

wait are some of you guys not in Wisconsin

"What's Made Milwaukee Famous (Has Made An Ilxor Out Of Me)"

Amazing that NYPD felt compelled to note the time stamp, with good reason ofc

"senator elect josh hawley (R-missouri)" fuck

The dipshit had a big night on Twitter (and he's still going). This was a particularly sad fart...

Does the Fake News Media ever mention the fact that Republicans, with the very important help of my campaign Rallies, WON THE UNITED STATES SENATE, 53 to 47? All I hear is that the Open Border Dems won the House. Senate alone approves judges & others. Big Republican Win!

— Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) December 7, 2018

Lol, that's incredible.

I had to check, Dems won 22 races and GOP 11. Twice as many.

wow, he was really on one last night huh, and again this morning

have we ever gotten to the bottom of who the '14/17/however many angry democrats' are btw

bye bye?

Robert Mueller and Leakin’ Lyin’ James Comey are Best Friends, just one of many Mueller Conflicts of Interest. And bye the way, wasn’t the woman in charge of prosecuting Jerome Corsi (who I do not know) in charge of “legal” at the corrupt Clinton Foundation? A total Witch Hunt...

— Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) December 7, 2018

He's having a busy morning.

he should eat more bran

or the magazine of a firearm

you're a butterfly, donald, and butterflies are free to fly,
fly away, high away

not a good sign for the trump gang :(

https://www.americanoversight.org/assistant-attorney-general-with-ties-to-russian-bank-recused-from-mueller-investigation

did somebody mention a swamp that needs draining? no?

The Angry Democrats are Mueller's team.

lol Trump will totally deny that any of his friendships are non-transactional if it'll keep him out of chokey.

prison-bound, indemnitized
sweet putin, whisper in my ear

OMG, there are rumors that John Kelly might resign! Stop the presses!

What do you mean these rumors have been swirling for months and months? No, seriously, these are *new* rumors. This changes *everything*. Without his mature, experienced, stabilising influence, Trump is totally going to go off the rails. This is it! This is the moment we have been waiting for! With him gone, with Sec. Nielsen gone ...

What do you mean she's not gone yet? She's been gone for months hasn't she? I could have sworn I read something about that.

Anyway, RIP Maddog Mattis. You put up a good fight. Resist!

RT: "So often, the president would say here's what I want to do and here's how I want to do it and I would have to say to him, Mr. President I understand what you want to do but you can't do it that way. It violates the law."

https://m.chron.com/business/article/Rex-Tillerson-13448868.php

hmm i wonder what it was about a former exxon man that might have made trump think he would be amenable to bending - if not outright breaking - the law

Leakin’ Lyin’ James Comey

Ooooh, do "One-eyed, one-horned, Flyin' Purple Liberty Eater" next!

Just as I'm reasonably sure Trump has no real aversion to breaking the law, I'm equally sure that in many/most cases he doesn't actually know that what he wants to do actually breaks the law or that there are even any laws pertaining to the thing he wants to do.

well, there is that too, yeah - he's not really known as a scrupulous law-respecter

god don jr is such a shithead

https://i.redd.it/3q2llsf9ev221.png

imagine donald trump being your father, AND you deeply crave his affection and approval, BUT the only way you know how to do this is recirculating dumb memes that attribute to him reagan-esque zingers utterly beyond his ability

wouldn't it be funny*

if the FBI tracked the TWC bomb threat to the white house. I mean our man gets so desperate he goes all fuck you i do it myself. I to don jr or somesuch. like some unforced error that's so basic that all the 3d russia chess stuff doesn't matter.

*it would not be funny (?)

There was a hilariously apolitical Comey mention in my most recent alumni magazine issue:

Khurram Mozaffer, AB '95, recently ran into former director of the FBI James Comey, JD '85, in New Jersey. They discussed life in Hyde Park and Spiro Fokas, AB '95. Both are writers: Khurram is toiling away in Hollywood and James was recently on a book tour for "A Higher Loyalty: Truth, Lies, and Leadership" (Flatiron Books, 2018)."

I thought that was cute.

wow are all the anecdotes that entertaining

I'm willing to bet money that Trump is the kind of guy that kicks dogs.

xpost Most are less entertaining.

There's another one about some other dude doing work for the FBI in Central Asia that ends with a long inexplicable digression about a former roommate of mine who apparently is a good overseas dinner companion.

xxp who was the last president before this to not have a pet in the WH?

I think Trump views the law the same way an NFL player views the referees, in his mind he's never *really* breaking the law, or maybe he kinda is but not as much as those other guys and I cannot believe you actually call that holding, these refs were obviously paid off blah blah blah, also the worst thing that could happen is a 15 yard penalty, there have never been any *real* consequences in the life of Donald Trump. if Junior gets indicted that might actually be uncharted territory for him. not that he cares much about Jr., but even he's got to know that having the son you named after yourself get indicted for helping your campaign is a pretty bad look and not something you can just easily wriggle out of

Trump is a known dog hater. He often insults people by saying they are “like a dog.” Just another reason I hate him. xp

Maybe the implication is "they taste like a dog." Because you know Trump eats pets, and possibly people, too. Definitely children.

Or maybe he's secretly Muslim.

Iirc He wasn't happy with the decision to name Don Jr. after himself. Trump plays the longtime, and giving a kid your name negates plausible deniability. Trump knew he was stuck with this loser forever.

"According to his first wife, Ivana, Donald Trump was never keen on bequeathing his name to anybody," Julia Ioffe wrote in GQ. "It was Ivana who wanted to call their newborn Donald junior. 'You can't do that!' Trump is quoted as saying in Ivana's memoir, 'Raising Trump.' 'What if he's a loser?'"

Even Trump is sometimes right.

imagine donald trump being your father, AND you deeply crave his affection and approval, BUT the only way you know how to do this is recirculating dumb memes that attribute to him reagan-esque zingers utterly beyond his ability

― |Restore| |Restart| |Quit| (Doctor Casino), Friday, December 7, 2018 9:15 AM (ten minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

If at least 3/5 of them weren't ambulatory shitpeople, I would feel almost unfathomable pity for the fruit of Donald Trump's loins.

wait who’s the fifth

Imagine what we could have been spared if Eric and Don Jr. had Menendez-ed that fuck.

XP Tiffany

I told my boss yesterday that I doubt even his children in legal jeopardy would inspire anything but a dismissive tweet: "Don Jr, who eye love, is innocent!! I wish him nothing but good luck!"

https://frinkiac.com/meme/S03E03/580394.jpg?b64lines=CiBEYWQsIGRvIHlvdSBrbm93IHdoYXQKICJTY2hhZGVuZnJldWRlIiBpcz8g

Manafort lying, Mueller charging, Kelly leaving, Comey testifying, Cohen pleading, Flynn cooperating, Giuliani talking, Putin smiling, tariffs hurting, deficits growing, economy slowing, and Trump whining about it all...

And Republicans wonder why they're in deep shit.

— Joe Walsh (@WalshFreedom) December 7, 2018

'don jr, who i barely know and worked very little on my campaign' shurely xp

joe walsh's rewrite of 'we didn't start the fire' fucking sucks

alfred, that is shockingly charitable. i would expect rather "Low-level 'Donald,' who I never liked and who many people think looks nothing like me, is being set up by the witch Hunt! More jail for Democrats who know there was no collusion for me, but waste big $$$ chasing LOSER SONS! A hoax!"

xpost to bg

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kfVsfOSbJY0

it's just that GRU that's got trump in its sway

Cackling supervillain: Mr. Trump, you must now make an impossible choice. You can either kill your eldest son, or...
(Trump shoots Donald Jr. in the face without hesitation)

montgomery "monty" brogan >>>>>>> donald trumplethinskin

Cackling supervillain: Mr. Trump, you must now make an impossible choice. You can either kill your eldest son, or...
(Trump shoots Donald Jr. in the face without hesitation shoots hand holding phone + KFC chicken thigh)

lol JiC otm

partying partying yeah

I'd figure with this arrest in Vancouver, there could be some Apple execs in China looking over their shoulder a bit more than usual.

but even he's got to know that having the son you named after yourself get indicted for helping your campaign is a pretty bad look and not something you can just easily wriggle out of

― frogbs, Friday, December 7, 2018 10:24 AM (twenty-five minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

No problem, just proportionately increase output of angry ranting spittle soaked tweets. It's how he's wriggled in the past; it's all he knows how to do.

rudy's been a good boy and has been allowed access to the crayon drawer again, i see

It has been incorrectly reported that Rudy Giuliani and others will not be doing a counter to the Mueller Report. That is Fake News. Already 87 pages done, but obviously cannot complete until we see the final Witch Hunt Report.

— Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) December 7, 2018

already 87 pages done

where's the tax returns?

good morning!

for the first time i'm impatient for the mueller report to be released just so we can see the trump team's exquisitely-argued rejoinder

"no collusion! no collusion!" for 88 pages

It's literally just 87 pages of tweet printouts.

ALL WOR K ANDNO PLAY MAKEs AMERICA A DULL COUNTRY . MAGA

just a phonebook-sized document full of jackie treehorn doodles

(Careful, even oblique references to wiener doodles could get u excommunicated from thraed.)

no i mean tasteful pencil renderings of my father ben gazzara in character as jackie treehorn

i know hillary's guilty but what am i?

a tax return!

isn't The Witch Hunt Report a Judy Blume book?

from the author of bunnicula and howliday inn

the first sentence was "The president's income tax returns were too complex for Americans to understand, alas" iirc

the first sentence was "The president's income tax returns were too complex for Americans to understand, alas SAD!" iirc

― reggie (qualmsley), Friday, December 7, 2018 11:20 AM (three minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

i had tiffany. ivanka don jr eric tiffany.

oh i guess barron counts

they wrote 87 pages about what, exactly

Hillary prison fanfic iirc

He's mistaken.

They printed out the itunes agreement for Trump to sign. Rudy insists they need to mail it to Apple to "prevent them from tracking you". He's the cyber security expert and he won't hear otherwise, dammit.

https://www.cnn.com/2018/12/07/politics/robert-mueller-john-kelly-obstruction-investigation/index.html

Kelly is widely expected to leave his position in the coming days and is no longer on speaking terms with President Donald Trump

I like how this makes it sound like some sort of petty family dispute over not passing grandpa the gravy boat at Thanksgiving or something

I've stopped speaking to Trump as well. I mean, fuck that guy, he doesn't listen, anyway. I don't even think he knows when my birthday is, even though I know his and bought him something cool, too.

(It was a custom McDonald's loyalty club card that only works on McRibs and Shamrock Shakes, isn't that awesome?)

wait, he's talking about hillary, right? right???

On that day...the deaf shall hear the words of a scroll & out of gloom & darkness the eyes of the blind shall see. For the tyrant shall be no more, the scoffer shall cease to be; All who are ready for evil shall be cut off...

Isaiah 29: 18-20

— Marco Rubio (@marcorubio) December 7, 2018

marco rubio is such a weirdo

It's amazing how many people accept positions in this administration thinking that they will succeed at influencing Trump to be less volatile and ignorant, like Kelly, or else manipulate him into following their own evil agenda, like Bolton. Then Trump proceeds to be just as volatile, ignorant and intractable as ever before. The "successful" ones are like Sarah Huckabee-Sanders and Kellyanne Conway, who have no ideas of their own and are content to act as obedient minions to Satan.

influencing Trump to be less volatile and ignorant, like Kelly,

this was the line on Kelly, pre-trump, but i think he's shown himself to be just another asshole. there was some recent thing about the long and agonizing process to get trump to answer the mueller questions. i remember reading that "it should have taken a couple days, but it took 3 weeks" or something like that. and at one point it said that the mueller-answering session was ruined because Kelly barged into the room to give an update on the CARAVAN

That's wonderful!

"it should have taken a couple days, but it took 3 weeks"

this was Giuliani that said that

imagine a white house team staffed with nothing but Barry Zuckerkorns

Do we even have to imagine that, really?