EURO 2020 (2021 Edition)

It's time

There is a prior thread for complaining about Euro 2020, but this thread is for exulting in Euro 2020, the last hurrah for many of us before the dead migrant labourer World Cup of [squints at notes] next fucking winter

Who you got? France?
Can you tell me anything about what's going on with Italy rn?
Is Gareth Southgate going to make any good decisions about Jack Grealish at any point?
Will Germany continue their run of scoring neverending worldies in qualifying or will it just be more weird sad shit as Jogi bows out?
Are you going 2 double dip on the (definitely happening!!) Copa America?

France to win, Immobile to get the Golden Boot.

Italy have conceded one goal in their last 13 matches, iirc. I think Turkey will give them a decent game tonight, though.

France’ group is absurd though : the 2 latest world champions and the latest euro champion...

france being good is well boring, can they be bad pls

Last chance for this group of Belgium players apparently as there won't be another international tournament in a while

imago with the most imago take possible

Comment il s'appelle? Kanté!
N'Golo N'Golo Kanté!

anyway i feel like the Euros always has more random darkish horse potential than the World Cup

also i shall be cheering for my home nation of Portugal

for the first time ever i might root for england cos so many of the fans clearly hate the players , think there are too many uppity blacks in the team and want them to lose. very france in 98 vibes. also i really believe in bellingham.

it's also pound for pound the most likeable England squad in an eternity but i don't think you win tournaments without a defence

I haven't followed football much but why is there a hatred for english players? Aren't they one of the most successful and yeah likeable players in a while?

England's racist meathead fan contingent are booing them for taking the knee

Oh dear, we don't deserve these athletes

Lol the ball car

Such a shame that no one is READY in the lead up to this thread

Would love to see Turkey win if only because it would piss off so many Europeans.

I haven't followed football much but why is there a hatred for english players? Aren't they one of the most successful and yeah likeable players in a while?

I've got an excuse.

Terrible defending from Turkey there

Aren't Italy playing at home? Not feeling the white kit.

rome, yes.

i’m not feeling the cut of it tbh. weedy t-shirt vibe.

jermaine jenas’ delayed laugh at mowbray’s “joke” about roman roads highlight so far.

Bad kit bad tournament, is how things usually roll.

Ironic that Mowbray referenced "the famous shirt" early on as I was looking at that kit wondering why

It's been alright this tho, Italy pretty but wasteful, Turkey gradually getting more confident in their counter

i’ve enjoyed the passing and tempo but turkey organised in defence and left italy looking a bit toothless. but for reasons not entirely clear i’ve been really looking forward to this tournament and will have bad opinions about all of it.

Donnarumma looks like he's got a fuck up in him

Chiellini enjoying that dive, lighten up Jenas ffs

At some point in this tournament, likely very soon, I'm going to need to get all the FUCK OFF VAR out of my system

italy looking p delish

How was that not a penalty for hand ball !?

cos you can't just kick it into a player's arm and call it handball

cos he was standing right in front of it?

Turkey to score first here, i'm calling it

There have been so many penalties for less than that...

Which shouldn't have been penalties either?

Handball was ruinously over-diagnosed even before VAR imo

That’s why defenders try to defend with their arms behind their back : otherwise why bother ?

Sometimes the limitations of human anatomy and the laws of physics will conspire to make that a tricky operation to pull off.

anyhoo i feel like Spinazzola got to the byline a yard clear so many times that half and they couldn't do anything with it

I'm a long time supporter of Jorginho but I'm developing a fanboy crush on Barella tonight, also Spinazolla looking great, Italy looking more self assured than the last time i watched them. Yeahyeah France but Italy look like winners to me, just sub on the Sassuolo kid for Immobile. I DGAF in the lead up, but have somehow started caring in the last hour

Nothing has really happened but I’m quite enjoying this game. Really feel like it is all about Italy trying too hard, so they will be a bit dumb and let Turkey get a chance to score first

Yeah MOTD lads being a bit generous to Italy

Bit of a snorer. Par for the course for an international tournament. It's been all Italy and they will win 1-0 or it will end 0-0 imo

Failing to get the ball anywhere near the penalty area after fucking around on a short corner is more professionally disgraceful than a foul throw imo

Thanks for reminding me of our season

Feeling a 1-0 to someone from a pen in this one.

Money is on Portugal for me, I like the defence and I think it’ll be a low scoring tournament. Nice to be watching football that feels like it means something for the first time in ages.

Ah well

Told you Turkey would score first

Lol

Turkey have gone

Spinazzola's had a great game

Aye, goal has shaken them. Oh, number 2 came as I was about to post "a second is inevitable"

Cyrus immobile the scorer, quelled surprise

Italy have been really fuckin good, thought turkey handled them well enough in first half but jesus they work you

Turkey's defence looked terrible on this.

Turkey have been fine, the keeper looks good, they're just outclassed here. they're better than Wales

Italy playing at a decidedly unitalian tempo is cool to see

Anyone heard the bang?

If Berardi had managed anything useful with his time and possession all night this wouldve been long wrapped up

I mean yes the first goal but still

Tournament of Bearded Men

That's 3

berardi substituted for a man whose surname contains all of his own within it, in the right order

Every chance a red yet

Italy have been pressing, lovely passing, no false moves, none of the totally off vibes in opening games of old. Kinda miss it but maybe it's me that needs to grow up.

Spinazzola MOTM for me

Actually, forget I said that if these BBC cunts are gunna agree with me

Italy were good throughout. Turkish keeper had the worst distribution of any goalie I have ever seen, almost as if he grew up in the handling backpasses era. shockingly poor.

Great shot stopping I thought

france, germany, and belgium are looking good.

out of those, i'd go for the belgians. nothing against the other two, though.

hoping netherlands, switzerland, and/or spain can have a good run out of pure luck/desire

Beyond rooting for France, I’d love to see a country to do a Greece 2004, pure out of nowhere surprise.

I'll root for Italy, S****n, Wales and I GUESS this nice enough Scotland squad all for family/historic reasons. My Mother will be disappointed but not surprised that I can't cheer for England, but if the rascists hate them enough then maybe I shall?

xp
watched the 'King Otto' documentary about Greece and Rehhagel this week. Good stuff.

imdb has made it nearly impossible for me to enjoy any documentary. are there any other good sports documentaries?

Always support Italy because they annoy clueless wankers who pretend to like football but this team seem a bit more likeable. Also Germany.

imdb has made it nearly impossible for me to enjoy any documentary. are there any other good sports documentaries?

― Punster McPunisher, Friday, 11 June 2021 22:14 (twenty minutes ago) bookmarkflaglink

The newish Maradona one is great. Will show you a lot about Italian football culture and history too, even if he is argentine

xp

best thing about the axis powers of football is that yer typical England fan despises them and they have always been astronomically superior and consistently more successful than England for at least the last 5 decades.

Indeed.

but come this is a football thread!

okay, sure, italy is fine, but i draw the line at juventus, which is four from the national football team plus ronaldo, which is just -- no!

Bad kit bad tournament, is how things usually roll.

― Are Animated Dads Getting Hotter? (Tom D.),

berardi substituted for a man whose surname contains all of his own within it, in the right order

― imago,

The newish Maradona one is great. Will show you a lot about Italian football culture and history too, even if he is argentine

― a hoy hoy,

I feel like bono's team were hampered by the abseiling and oversized balls. Tactically the edge and Martin garrix should of stopped kicking a drum machine around and got stuck in, poor display

the oversized pitch banners and hoardings screaming Euro 2020 were a bit visually lol, all it needed was a spray can, fellas, did someone in the office go...'2021!! well I've printed all the napkins now, ffs..don't worry, boss, no-one will notice'....

NV made the point that they’d have been rightly lambasted for the waste involved in disposing of it all so I guess it’s the right thing to do. Feels weirdly Panglossian though. “If I just close my eyes and wish hard enough it’s like COVID never happened!”

sorry, if I missed a reference to the branding upthread, sure, I get the waste was a factor though you'd still think there would have been some amendments/rethinking.
It had a suitable pandemic era vibes, I guess....time losing meaning, the 'fuck that will do, the entire pr team are working from home and AWOL...etc..

You didn’t miss anything, NV said that elsewhere!

But yeah agree totally.

ha, ok, yeah, it was only missing the euro officials wearing top half tuxedos and bottom half board shorts..can't wait till they present the winners medals by sticking them to players faces to check if their vaccine magnetism has kicked in

Is Ben Davies... pregnant? pic.twitter.com/ouxX0eAQ59

— Dafydd Pritchard (@DafPritchard) June 12, 2021

Excited to see how Rodon gets on.

Fuck me, the BBC has dredged up Neil Kinnock to blabber away before the match kicks off. I hate how football is covered these days. Plus I dislike them having a Welsh presenter and all Welsh pundits, seems patronising as hell, like little old Wales can't take the criticism. I hope they don't do the same for Scotland, at least they should have Limmy or somebody on instead of Ruth Davidson or whoever.

anybody fancy a sweep on the minute when the commentator first uses the word "adventure"?

Gabbie Logan eligible via a Welsh parent

She definitely considers herself Welsh. Who are Scotland going to get, Hazel Irvine?

Is Dougie Donnelly still alive?

That's probably where Limmy comes in I guess

Nervously turning round and glancing at the camera like "awright?"

Aye, right, heard it, they a' say that Dougie...

https://www.thescottishsun.co.uk/news/1952916/sportscene-dougie-donnelly-twitter-hacked-x-rated-snaps/

Nervously turning round and glancing at the camera like "awright?"

"... fuckin'... so Scotland ur playin' the day..."

.....i really dont see an issue with an all welsh panel?

the fuck would wrighty or shearer add, like?

Make it less of a flag fucking forum?

where's Terry Yorath these days? he's too sozzled to even talk probably.

I genuinely thought he was dead tbh but nope

A "tired and emotional" Yorath would still be a huge improvement on Kinnock tbf

Ouch, as they say

There's been a clash of heids!

It looks like the Wales keeper today, Ward has barely played a game in league football since his season at Town in '17. I'd forgotten he even exists.

sounds like he made a good save there

He's heard of the second world war though, yeah?

Scher having a torrid time against Dan James

"Tonight I'm gonna go down in flames,
Skinned by Daniel James"

This is kinda like watching last night's game on half speed

Oof, missed a sitter

One of my fav things about tournaments is those random players whose nationality you've never thought about before popping up, "Shaqiri is Swiss?!?" etc

he's very much Albanian when the Swiss play Serbia though!

That was a tremendously spicy encounter

Just dogshit defending there

Yeah that was awful

Not sure getting a 5’8” lad to mark Embolo was wise tbh.

Good lord he's at it

Moore has been absolute waste

The Swiss logo is absolutely bewildering

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Swiss_Football_Association#/media/File%3ASFV_Logo.svg

Well look at that

Switzerland just let Wales play for the last 10 minutes

Well well!

Dan James taking his substitution with good grace

Daft to take him off imo

Can they really afford to take him off?

Don't recall the Wales lads in the BBC studio mentioning Bale as being an important part of the plan at half time

Both sides have suddenly decided maybe they want the win

I said he was offside as well Savage but I don't think it was commentator's eye

Man I felt that coming.

No goal

A little car, a little VAR

Really didn't need VAR to spot that

I wouldn't fancy Wales to get anything from their next 2 games so not sure they should be thrilled with a point

Very timid in the first half but looked shaky as hell at the back when they started pushing

forgot to mention it y'day but kudos for rio's "most of this turkish team have played in europe". you don't say rio.

It’s the insight we all live for.

Anyway, Danes, Finns, etc

OK, so turn on the Den/Fun match to hear Jonathan Pearce going on about the Irish Potato Famine.

... before reverting to his usual routine of spending most the match talking about which English teams the players play for/ used to play for/ might one day play for.

English commentator here just mentioned Danish assistant coach Morton Wieghorst and didn't mention he played for Celtic. No mention that Denmark's goaly formerly was a loanee at Falkirk either. SPFL erasure. Raging.

This is too one-sided to be entertaining

and our first hockey reference

Oh fuck

Damn

Oh God, this doesn't look good.

Maybe Pearce could shut up

Looks like they're trying to resuscitate him. I feel sick.

Yeah that moment, horrifying

Match suspended. Clearly couldn’t go on.

I had to turn the tv off as it began to feel indecent. I had a wee cry. I pray he survives

Christ

I'd call tonight's match off too, this is too affecting for anybody to enjoy a game today

Well fuck this

Particularly his current and former teammates in the Belgium team. Xp

terrible to watch. cesc and alex scott p much mirrored my reaction.

Jesus christ that was horrible

I really wish the camera hadn't zoomed in on his face when he'd collapsed on his side initially

Seen a pic of him seemingly awake on twitter but you never know if thats recent or what

Ugh yeah don't know what to make of that, don't want to read too much into it

I'm torn between wanting to know how he is ASAP and not wanting that churn of twitter idiots posting unsubstantiated rumours and spamming footage of the collapse

UPDATE: Denmark midfielder Christian Eriksen was conscious and raised his hand when he was carried from the field

— BNO News (@BNONews) June 12, 2021

If you zoom in on the photo it looks like someone has a mask under their chin so could well be from today

I think the pic looks legit, so it might not be such a terrible outcome.

such a horrific scene. really hope all the positive news is true

Following the medical emergency involving Denmark’s player Christian Eriksen, a crisis meeting has taken place with both teams and match officials and further information will be communicated at 19:45 CET.

The player has been transferred to the hospital and has been stabilised.

— UEFA (@UEFA) June 12, 2021

There was also a cheer from the crowd as he was carried off which you hope was because they could see he was conscious

That's such a relief.

Oh thank fuck

I can eat my dinner now, I was feeling nauseous there. Oh, and good news about Christian Eriksen too.

Thank fuck. So glad there is better news.

Thank god he is stable.

I hate when these things happen, not just for the players whose lives hang in the balance but the performative grief from ppl who didn’t know who the player was until he collapsed and want to do moral outcry on the internet to anyone less informed than them at that precise moment

— Marxus Rashford (@judeinlondon2) June 12, 2021

People getting on their high horse about people commenting or speculating on a terrible incident at what was after all a public event is bullshit imo!

The Denmark v Finland game is back on!

They’re restarting the match in twenty five minutes, jfc.

Finishing the game tonight is utter bullshit unless every player has specifically requested this

did the players agree?

They've agreed, that's not the same as wanting it to continue imo

UEFA saying it was the players' idea.

Fair enough then

Dunno if pictures will be broadcast - Pat Nevin (who's wrong about most things tbf) is saying the Danish players don't look v happy to be back on the pitch

it'll be interesting to see if each team tries to win or just play for a draw

it's back on bbc one in about 5 minutes.

i flicked over and they were still doing that singing quiz, thanks

Belgium putting a Donk on it tonight

Eriksen's spoken to the Danish team <3

On now on bcc

yeah, gonna watch Belgium-Russia tho when that starts tbh

“Christian Eriksen is out of danger, his father told me from the hospital. He’s able to speak”. Martin Schoots, Eriksen agent, just added to NOS. 🙏🏻 #prayforEriksen

Official: Eriksen conditions are stable and the match restarts at 20.30 CET.

— Fabrizio Romano (@FabrizioRomano) June 12, 2021

bit disrespectful of Finland

Horrible for the scorer tbh. First ever finals goal for Finland and has to cut short his celebration once he realised

Should that even have been a pen?

Was soft. Justice prevails

Why would you get Hojbjerg to take it?

The BBC live text resuming with Erikson being substituted in the 42nd minute was such a weird vibe

The supporters in the stadium must be exhausted

Elsewhere, Rom scores

lukaku puts one in for eriksen

Lukaku goal and saying chris eriksen i love you #eriksen #lukaku #euro2020 pic.twitter.com/nvuYEYzP9w

— zeka (@vzeka7) June 12, 2021

Lol that's the Donk I know and love

Oof now this

4 minutes injury time seems a bit stingy.

Belgium 2-0 up

Hope Belgium mollicate this mob.

ITV fuck off with your ex-ref pundit

The guy's a dogfucker

Carrasco just acting the dick there

Russian sub http://www.bbc.co.uk/staticarchive/018e77adf98bfd2e1daba843a5492f0c79799abe.jpg

lol Tom that's the first time I've heard the word mollicate since I was a kid. also agree, mollicate these wankers.

is it similar in meaning to marmalize? good word!

Is it pronounced mewlicated? Great word!

Real clinical shit from Lukaku

Further mollication achieved.

Is it pronounced mewlicated? Great word!

Ask Bobby Gillespie, he'll know.

if Russia was still communist they'd have won this 4-3

hoping de bruyne gets some play time next game

lol before even a ball has been kicked #southgateout is trending

hah hah it seems he's playing Trippier at left-back with Chilwell on the bench, what a weapon!

Rumoured England starting XI for today:

Pickford; Walker, Stones, Mings, Trippier; Phillips, Rice, Mount; Foden, Kane, Sterling.

Oh yeah that'll put asses in seats

I think it's Gareth's British sense of fair play at work here, because of all the unfair home advantage England have got in this tournament the odds had to be levelled a bit!

what has Grealish done wrong?

Not a guileless automaton iirc

Pickford; Walker, Stones, Mings, Trippier; Phillips, Rice, Mount; Foden, Kane, Sterling.

That's an amazingly English collection of names.

Grealish is an Irish name (I think) so no way Southgate could play him in that team.

imagine if both Grealish and Kane had declared for RoI and Sterling + Rashford for Jamacia and west indies.. lol they'd be fucked

yeah Grealish went to a school called our Lady of Lourdes, that was enough to confirm it's an Irish name

Oh wow, I had no idea Kane's father is Irish (and called, rather amusingly, Pat Kane). I've always thought of Kane as one of the most English Englishmen I've ever clapped eyes on.

yeah he seems the epitome of Englishness for some reason, could imagine him driving a white van and working for Pimlico Plumbing.

Best of luck to the England team from the great people of West Bromwich East 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁥󠁮󠁧󠁿#ENG pic.twitter.com/eef6LPnAE1

— Nicola Richards MP (@Nicola4WBE) June 13, 2021

lol

Why is there no Eng flag covering the bin?

Schmeichel sr sounds furious with UEFA for restarting the game yesterday.

Good luck England except for that twat Greasy, **** hate the vile, they're so **** jammy 🤬🤬🤬

Sir this is a McDonald's

Why is there no Eng flag covering the bin?

dustbin looks like some sort of foreign siege tower assaulting the outer walls of the castle

Xp yeah, giving the players the choice of restarting last night or at 12 pm today (probably after a sleepless night), then reporting it as the players specifically requesting it be restarted last night is shady as fuck

Like you can believe anything UEFA say.

a+ nickb

it's like the rumoured XI is correct, but Chilwell isn't on the bench.

Seems weird to leave JWP at home, he can help you score all of your 5 goals in the tournament from set pieces while also being able to cover right back, seems right up Southgate's street

southgate sticking by sterling but saka needs time in this team, he's a consistent performer right now

Trippier at left back is quite the move.

Is this not a 3-5-2 with TRIPZ rwb?

philips + rice is overkill, but then again mings isn't any good so i guess that explains it. foden is better than grealish.

I wouldn't have either of them cunts at right back let alone squeezing em both in

3-1 Croatia

1-1, someone getting sent off leading to a nervous last twenty minutes. Kramaric to outshine Kane and finally vindicate my 2014 suggestion that Spurs should buy the former to replace the latter, England to finish top of the group.

2-0 England

Rashford 1-0 England

I hope Tyrone Mings is suitably ashamed for all the substandard performances he's about to turn in

i look at that back 6 and the word "porous" won't leave my head

i hope when the scum boo the knee England walk off the pitch and report the FA to UEFA

They're never going to stop cutting back to those queen dickheads are they

we're just gonna boo the opposition having the ball now

it's 2021 and the shadow on the pitch still looks like an abyss. the croatian players just disappear when they venture into it, reduced to a pair of walking boots (until the camera compensates and then the bright bit is too bright)

England not created enough, foden chance aside, Croatia weathering the storm, kalvin Phillip's best player early doors

Do you never sometimes engage in a little no-particular-reason booing of the opposition down at Charlton Athletic imago?

Kylole Walolker

Somebody must be frantically working on a gif of that as I type

Yeah that's about his third fuck up in three touches of the ball

It's 2021 and Iplayer is still like two minutes behind broadcast

A propos of nothing I'd like to say I still really hate Jordan Pickford

Have mings, ings and jesse lings ever all been in the same ingland side?

ffs Lampard and Shearer together at last.

i knew somebody would have it

Kyle Walker!! 👀👀 pic.twitter.com/5Pjb5lKiEc

— Steven Calvert (@Calvy1981LFC) June 13, 2021

Its too dark on that side of the pitch. How is he supposed to see?!

walkers is such a blurr of fury and robotic mechanics, turns like an action man

fuck off Fwank, no-one cares about your next career move

Lol at Lineker casually torturing him to kill time

is kane fit? he seems off the pace

Two players that have earned that

Was that the singer from Kasabian in the crowd celebrating?

BONK

(xp) I'd recognize that swagger anywhere.

I mean I’m glad to see him moving/reacting after yesterday

Kane not Kasab

Jesse Lingard supporting England with a parrot on his shoulder for some reason #ENG pic.twitter.com/mn92wZnTyc

— Footballers with animals (@ftbllrswanimals) June 13, 2021

So far Jenas very much from the Phil Neville stating the bleeding obvious in as boring a voice as possible school of punditry.

Was that the singer from Kasabian in the crowd celebrating?

The wife beater or the one with the Italian name who made an arse of himself prancing about in his pyjamas on the Jools Holland show?

he might have been celebrating finishing his last hour of community service

How is Phillips not on a yellow yet? Poor reffing.

Turkish keeper had the worst distribution of any goalie I have ever see

Pickford saying ‘hold my beer’.

lol he's L1 standard!

Scotland winnin' this group easy, nae tother a' ba'.

If I had a choice of Pickford or Alex Smithies on a free transfer I'd take the latter. Pickford's career progressing this far is a headscratcher really, maybe a case of nominative determinism.

scuse me while I vomit

Feel like 'twas ever thus with England teams and managers, for all the good players they produce they consistently pick WTF players.

LOL, they think they're going to win it now, you love to see it.

Doctor says eriksen had a cardiac arrest jfc

xxp

being England no 1 also falsely inflates Pickford's club rep. Lossl - who is four times the keeper this fucker will ever be couldn't even get a chance at Everton.

V happy for Sterling and with this outcome

Pickford in full flight of a phenomenon i recognise from robinson and ian walker before him, hugely flawed fuck-up factories who have been picked for england and a premier league club and seemingly that's a loop that light itself cannot escape once moving

phillips was excellent

kyle walker is still a shopping trolley in a jersey, the greatest sincere fool in the game and ill never be sorry we sold him

"hugely flawed fuck-up factories who have been picked for england and a premier league club and seemingly that's a loop that light itself cannot escape once moving"

^^^

that's right!

I’m cautiously optimistic this might be a good game. Elmas and Bardhi are both excellent.

Damn good goal, that.

yes

Superb finish.

lmao what a mess. VAR?

Haha wow

Watching a stream of broadcast ITV because ITV player is so shit

have found a stream that isn't ITV but has English commentators I've definitely heard before

austrians love holding their faces eh

ESPN commentator just said “The Bachman turnover and North Macedonia in overdrive” and then immediately apologized. Rightly.

down the highway, to success

my stream has half-time punditry from terry phelan, mark seagraves and louis saha. it is awesomely shonky. always gonna watch sony sports' euro coverage

i mean i'd never heard of mark seagraves before

ahhhh the co-commentator is don goodman

Its been a tournament of excellent saves so far, another just there

this north macedonia goalie is my favourite player so far this tournament i think

Best game so far I think

Nobody's scored from outside the area yet have they?

I was just saying elsewhere this is easily the best match yet. Went in with unsure expectations but man it’s delivered.

there's real needle there too. hoping for a red card or two

Should imo have had them already

i mean there's no way alioski finishes this game on the field

What a cross

Phew. Live by the error, die by it.

Wonderful cross from Alaba.

Astonishing stuff

Youd think southern slavic states would know to defend those corridors of uncertainty ffs

Well you could sense that one happening

Disappointed to not be able to lip read German.

Nobody to blame but yrself there tbf

if baumgartlinger had come on for baumgartner it'd have been bernardeschi for berardi all over again

omg that celebration from the austrian coaching staff, embarrassing

grey mad professor pierre van hooijdonk and Roy poly ' I bought a pub' rafael van de vaart on my stream for the dutch

Wow, Timber has played fewer than 2000 minutes of senior football and starts at CB.

The harder he'll fall

begun promisingly this

Was thinking there will be (more) massive gaps appearing and four goals in the last 15 minutes of the 90 if this pace keeps up, but I guess 5 subs mitigates that

now think Marlos is my favourite player

just some Brazilian dude wandering on as a sub and casually showing off

people blindly calling for a 4-3-3 has me thinking cruyff and his strategy has to be one of the most misunderstood in all sports

i urge you all to start streaming Sony's Indian coverage, if only so you can experience the grinning avuncular presence of Mark Seagraves as half-time analyst. also blithe wonderful idiot Andy Townsend is co-commentator now :D

Simon Brotherton main comms too, and he's great

ohhh Brotherton/Townsend are the world feed comms. Seagraves and company are Sony-specific

There it is

rancid keeping

definitely a gift. netherlands do need to be a bit faster on the attack, though

now think Marlos is my favourite player

― imago, Sunday, 13 June 2021 19:27 (fifty-five minutes ago) bookmarkflaglink

just some Brazilian dude wandering on as a sub and casually showing off

― imago, Sunday, 13 June 2021 19:27 (fifty-four minutes ago) bookmarkflaglink

and then wandering off again less than an hour later

Shame its 2-0. Ukraine are a fun side.

Sweeeeeeet

That was sharp! Let’s see another

Hell, yeah.

i'm rooting for the dutch but that was the best goal of the game so far. hopefully things pick up now

omg bitchin'

Yesss!

That was gorgeous.

Whoosh!

wow

Haha!

ROCK!

This is terrific.

urkanine attacking football seems to be mainly back heel flicks and stylish goals, I like it

That was gorgeous (not a double post)

humdinger!

Keepers fucked it

it's all happening here!

Ah, rats.

this fucking keeper

Still, making them work for it.

dumfries had been trying for a header for a while

ugh. veltman means more defending.

wondering if de boer will bring in a striker or an attacking midfielder

dumfries got his goal away

Looks like I picked the wrong game to miss.

seagraves, baichung bhutia and DAVID JAMES on video link this time in the Sony studio

Dumfries had a great game

Not sure how reliable the Serbian press reporting of what Arnautovic was saying is but Alaba’s attempt to forcibly shut his mouth is starting to look more understandable.

According to Serbian media, Austrian striker with serb origin Marko Arnautović, screamed "F*ck your Albanian mothers!" after his goal against N. Macedonia
If true, I hope there is serious punishment from UEFA, especially since Xhaka and Shaqiri were fined after the 👐 celebration

— Xhul Lezha (@xhuliano23) June 13, 2021

Good lord

I have a strange urge to stick money on Lewandowski top scorer via some Oleg Salenko type situation

Seeing a permutation now where Austria play the Czechs (or, sure why not, Scotland) and Finland play Turkey and one of those four gets all the way to the semis.

Austria gonna beat the Ukraine? Unlikely

Oh but 3rd place and stuff

haven't watched scotland in forever. i assume both robertson and tierney play, but which one plays LB and where does the other one operate?

Tierney plays in central defence.

We need a footballer in there as Grant Hanley is about to win his 34th Scotland cap.

... uh, what am I saying, apparently Tierney isn't playing!

not even on the bench so must be injured? thanks for your answer anyway Tom. i figured they must both usually make the team.

The team:

Marshall, O'Donnell, Cooper, Hendry, Hanley, Robertson, Christie, Armstrong, McTominay, McGinn, Dykes.

I heard somebody speculating on whether Clarke would pick two strikers and I thought, ffs get a grip, no Scotland manager has played two strikers since about 1982.

Ok, I’ve decided to get my hopes up

If they can't beat the Czechs they're fucked, so I'm not getting carried away here.

tony watt's been very adorable on twitter supporting the lads and getting into the stadium early. why isn't he in the team/squad though ffs, what character does lyndon dykes even have. what personality

that musical montage on the bbc has just turned me in to a Czech R fan!

Was that Biffy Clyro? Good grief.

It was horrible

Sorry.

That first violin note was like the synth in born slippy and i got very psyched

Good anthem isn't it

Well anyway

oopsadaisy

Schoolboy defending. Where was Wonderboy Robertson?

Now some forensic analysis from a current Scotland player and two Scotland fans.

Ah man when the keeper pulls those off it isn't your day

Unlucky with the crossbar clip too - fun couple of minutes

LOL

uh oh

I JUST

Hanley gets injured and it all falls apart.

What a goal.

Ahaha

It is now time to really hit the bar

Right on cue with the fans singing Flower of Scotland.

Spuer execution

Why was Marshall even there?

That was brilliant admittedly. Hendry should be shot though.

Sweeper keeper, Scotland style

I can't help but feel that Biffy Clyro is responsible.

lol was just posting the exact same!

I'm not even hurting, thanks to Biffy Clyro and all that BBC fan-pleasing bollocks before the match.

(xp) That makes three of us!

How quickly one's hopes can be crushed

Yes, two seconds of Biffy Clyro and that's that.

I'm not even hurting

Wait til this leads to the Czechs winning the group and England getting the softer route.

pic.twitter.com/2IO2YEbaU1

— G A V (@gavinwcameron) June 14, 2021

Tony Watt puts that one away

Actually I think that gets VAR'd off

Eunice Watts puts that one away

Fucking up the easiest game is classic Scotland though. England will hammer us and we'll probably beat Croatia 3-0.

What's up with Marshall's goal? The net is sagging a lot at the back.

just booing a guy for having blood pouring out of his head okay?

Maybe it was Scotland fans booing the fact that Scott McTominay exists?

Mctominay taking Kenny Miller's place as cunt with a skeletal face in the Scottish national team

At least Miller played the occasional good game.

McTominay has looked half asleep the whole match. Anyway, classic Scotland as has been noted. Hendry shot was the stupidest idea so far this tournament, totally cretinous.

Also look physically much softer and weaker than the Czechs all over the pitch

This Czech team are far from perfect but they are loads of fun to watch.

blaming a guy taking a shot for a goal down the other end is more cretinous than taking the shot imo

No it isn't.

We're talking Jack Hendry here, not Zlatan Ibrahimovic.

pic.twitter.com/LNVXyXMsjh

— JailTheEnglish.org 🇵🇸 (@JailTheEnglish) June 14, 2021

What the fuck are you talking about imago, a centre-back 25 yards out with about 5 Scotland players in advance of him witlessly smacking the ball straight into one of the many bodies in front of him leaving a 2 on 2 behind him. The finish was obviously incredible but it’s really stupid play for a team with plenty of time to come back from 1 down

that is excitingly wild of a post but it's also fucking nonsense

of all the expected outcomes of taking a 25-yard shot, 'block rebounds straight to attacker who instantly lays off teammate who scores from 50 yards' is not the percentage play now is it

anyway, the regular football threads will be ready and waiting for such vituperative takes next season

Scotland got the wrong end of the Schtick, thank you, thank you, I'll be here, all tournament

I didnt know it was a centre half but in the few seconds before that shot i did have it down as "sat up, worth hitting" and ive to agree with imago that its a long reach to latch in on that effort as "at fault for the ensuing wondergoal" tbh

Now...if twas spurs obv id feel otherwise

I think it's been explained adequately, even if it hadn't lead to a goal it was a stupid move from a dunderheaded central defender who couldn't hit a cow's arse with a banjo at the best of times.

this is the most ludicrous ad hominem criticism i've ever seen on a football thread

however i am not jack hendry's mum so i desist

actually no wait, he scored from outside the box against the netherlands LAST WEEK you silly twats

That's worse, now he'll be trying it in every game.

Classic toshack commentary snippet in my head from oh two decades ago

"Michel Salgado, from there? Right foot?

Should be booked for time wasting"

'block rebounds straight to attacker who instantly lays off teammate who scores from 50 yards'

it was actually this, there was no touch between the block and the hit, you can't expect that

Very soft goal.

Own goal, I gues.

Pretty good match so far, this.

Well that’s a way to start a half!

That is calm stuff

The summarizer in this match really knows what she's talking about, which is just as well as she's doing a hell of a lot of talking!

softest red ever

Nah thats a yellow all day

If you let big clumsy fuckers stamp on feet full force all day without accumulated punishment you hate actual footballers, basically

They are Marxists now so

how is this match going? i need something entertaining while i do some tedious task for work

It’s been a good one, currently 1-1

Nice goal

1-1 you say? No idea what Slovakia is like politics-wise these days but I'm sure they can't be worse than Poland, so get in there you Slovaks!

Make that 2-1 Slovakia!

They are Marxists now so

― xyzzzz__, Monday, 14 June 2021 17:23 (two minutes ago) bookmarkflaglink

I dont want this latest thing explained or anything it would just be good if it didn't happen any more

GTFABMTBF

My what disconcerting arms

oooh, thanks ned!

Ten man poland chasing this means hamsik feasts imo

aye, can't see past the slovaks here

Just catching up on the further bewildering defence of Jack Hendry and his bad decision, don’t feel ready to let this one go yet.

It was absolutely not ‘worth hitting’ if you are at all invested in a positive outcome for Scotland. It was a stereotypical example of ‘don’t fucking shoot for fuck sake’.

The amazing finish that followed is neither here nor there, it was more likely that the ball would end up going back over Hendry’s head somehow than that it would end up in the top corner. He had left a big gap behind him and one of the two people filling it was Grant Hanley.

Hendry averages a goal every 24 games, the fact he scored against the Netherlands the other week is not a reason to expect a 25 yarder to fly in every 70 mins, this is obvious and basic.

I’m surprised that Hendry’s decision being described as cretinous has caused such uproar. If it had been Davinson Sanchez taking that stupid fucking shot there’d be a whole thread for why he’s more of a cunt than Starmer within 10 mins.

i'll add to the slight defense of it. it was a daft thing, but the kind of daft thing that happens in every game of football pretty much.

also very much an embodiment of the scottish football geist of "just take a dig", "dont try passing it into the net" etc.

Starmer isnt a huge reference point for me tbh

A goal every 24 games isnt a bad return and allowing that its within hitting distance sitting up its not a ridiculous prospect

A goal every seventy minutes is some form of nonsense red herring and i reject it

Scored a goal against Holland and now he thinks Ronaldo is more like it.

Ffs

Just worked out the other voice Emma Hayes most reminds me of is Glenn Hoddle.

I was thinking Stuart Pearce.

Haha was just going to say she has an identical accent and speech pattern to Hoddle

She's making everyone else look like shit though, haven't really heard anyone close to this level of insight and preparedness for ages

Yep darragh was just going with the most ‘ilx’ option for a cunt, was a poor choice for my example and I’ll admit my error there.

Still not having any of this other bullshit though. Scotland were in a promising position and he took the most stupid/least imaginative option (just fucking have a go fuck it). The fact it was instantly followed by a member of the opposition very quickly executing the most effective option available to them absolutely perfectly only makes it more annoying if anything.

And more like starmer i spose

Slovakia hold to win, great match!

Scotland need a striker and to play to some of these players strengths, Steve Clarke!??

My instant reaction at the time, as a Scotland fan and not as a neutral observer, was "Aw naw, don't fuckin' shoot from there, ya fuckin' balloon", and, having just re-watched it, I can confirm that this reaction was thoroughly warranted. Firstly, he's 30 not 25 yards out and secondly he's Jack Hendry.

happy with this result, happy with my new display name

david marshall is also at fault for that goal. commentators hitting out with "there's absolutely nothing he could do about it", he could have tried not being 35 yards off his line

that czech goal against scotland has to be goal of the tournament

this is some fifa 21 shit

OUT OF THIS WORLD FROM PATRIK SCHICK 🤯 pic.twitter.com/1GDdrwwvmB

— ESPN FC (@ESPNFC) June 14, 2021

Is Jack Hendry shite at FIFA as well?

Agree Marshall had no need to be out that far, though understandably he’d have been expecting the ball to nestle in the Czech net so he probs wanted to get closer to the celebrations

it looks like he didn't even make it to fifa 21:

https://www.fifaindex.com/team/1359/scotland/

the team selection was fucking shite as well tbh.

the attempts to cover for "spain are shit now and have to hoof it" are a bit tragic

— joolsd (@joolsd) June 14, 2021

i will say it's ballsy of luis enrique to call mostly young players and new talent instead of the big names

no Ramos, no busquets, its definately a new day

will miss the shithousery of super villain ramos

can't beat the daft spanish anthem with no lyrics and all the fans doo doo dooing

Tiki taka rati packa

Great ball great save

it is pretty crazy how good they are at possession

Looking at the Spain 11 I felt a bit out of my depth

Span definitely not ‘shit now’

I always think of Wales when I hear the name Rodri.

85% possession.

they were at 87% at one point

85 % possession looks too low ... they are like hungry piranhas when they lose the ball for a few seconds

Needs a Swedish goal for some deep lolz

Lol this is shit

lol

Equal distribution of possession now!

i think you need to get the ball first before you can get a goal

Fucking hell Sweden should've scored

This bloodless domination is pretty much what Spain were doing when they won everything and were the best team in the world tbh

fucking 90% possession and Sweden got closest to scoring!

spain doesn't seem to have any good strikers in their right now

both teams insisting on perpetrating my pet hate ie bringing back the entire team when defending a corner.boo.

morata is distractingly handsome

Emma Hayes was great on the co-commentary earlier, puts the usual crew to shame.

diag targeting alba Sweden's only tactic afaikt.

Moreno is going to have to come on if it stays like this.

Isak doing his best to live up to the hype

Excellent break from Sweden

berg? more like berk

isak killing it

So take him off. Is the manager Scottish?

spain is a one-trick pony sweden have figured out

this is a long way from Spain Classic ©

this wasn't bad for a nil nil

feel like sweden set up for the draw, shame they weren't more adventurous, spain too slow with their attacks, the game needed an early goal

Just notice that one of finlands big performers in their win over Denmark, amongst all the trad Finnish sounding squad names, was the midfielder, 'Daniel O'Shaughnessy'. The irish ringer plays for HJK in Finland apparently

there was an o'shaughnessy and a delaney (for denmark) on the park. i believe o'shaugnessy is half-finnish half-irish and delaney is half-american, half-swedish

I get the same double take with that 'Martin braithwaite' player....are you sure you got on the right bus, lad!?!

Finn McCool. Take this O'Shaughnessy guy add him to Harry Kane and you've got at least one Irishman at the Euros.

Isak was having a 'wicked game' until he was inexplicsbly substituted

Nothing particularly irish about the name daniel o'shaughnessy imo?

It's Irish as fuck

Bobson O'Dugnutt

Patrick Joseph O'Dowd

kalvin Phillip's is half irish too, can we have a word with the irish selectors, you missed out on everyone, Phillip's, kane, rice, grealish and bamford ....

Its been fuckin said dont worry

Nothing particularly irish about the name daniel o'shaughnessy imo?

― Eschew things thirty two times before swallowing them (darraghmac), Tuesday, 15 June 2021 02:17 (seven hours ago) bookmarkflaglink

It's Irish as fuck

― paolo, Tuesday, 15 June 2021 07:06 (two hours ago) bookmarkflaglink

Well thats me told

I can't remember which one John Terry visited when it got out they were undecided, but I think they were too young + impressionable to resist the wise counsel of such an eminent elder statesman.

Rice, surely

To think he could've played on the paddy fields of the aviva eh

that was probably part of his PowerPoint presentation

A message from @ChrisEriksen8.
♥️🤍 pic.twitter.com/WDTHjqE94w

— DBU - En Del Af Noget Større (@DBUfodbold) June 15, 2021

15 minutes to...something.

COME ON ME BABBIES

Full house in Budapest

I imagine Orban doesn't believe in COVID. I must admit I don't usually have much time for Portugal but I hope they murder these Nazis.

Urgh. Predictably lots of anti-lockdown arseholes praising Hungary on social media.

Wondering if Pepe's been playing for Portugal longer than Jude Bellingham's been alive

Portugal making heavy work of it, they could go through the gears a little quicker

Wondering if Pepe's been playing for Portugal longer than Jude Bellingham's been alive

As a naturalised Brasilian, Pepe was a bit of a late starter for the national team

Bellingham was two months old when Ronaldo made his international debut though

shit ref and two teams hellbent on cheating. a freekick being awarded on a human face forever

2 villains of world football coming head to head here for sure. luckily i actually have work to do this morning and am only half watching.

Same here. A lot of running around and gesticulating from what I can tell.

my feelings align with jim on this. i just couldn't care less about either of these two teams. i'll probably keep the tv off until 12

Astonishing miss

:D

Worth it to watch Ronaldo’s gesticulations getting more and more petulant as the game goes on. Fully expecting a dodgy red card in this one too.

yah that was sitter for cron. pub footballer vibes from hungary cf szalai.

Not been the best first half. 4 out of 6 third place teams qualifying seems to have removed a lot of tension from the group stages.

jota not squaring it to ronnie was funny.

xp 3rd place teams qualifying will always be unbearably stupid.

this might be a good time to bring up that i searched for the "maradona documentary" recently and found about four of them released in the last two years. i couldn't tell which one you guys were referring to

I disagree as it lends itself to a more unpredictable round of 16 and didn't really affect quality of games in general in 2016 xp, plus it was always possible to qualify with three draws anyway (even 2 points although I don't suppose that ever happened).

xp. the asif kapadia one from 2019 called "diego maradona"

Hungary have been fun in the second half so far

xp prefer 16 teams to start then 8,4 etc fuck a round of 16

This game seems like a concerted group effort to make Americans angry

I’d struggle to see Portugal finishing as one of the top four third placed teams if they don’t win here.

oh, awesome. found it. thanks, jim!

Hopeless goalkeeping.

lol that linos aren’t allowed to flag for those super obvious offsides. Ropey from the keeper...

Jammy bastards.

Great, we get to hear John Hartson struggle to pronounce the word 'penalty'.

This is everything the nation of Hungary deserves, lads

I'm not watching this but having seen the score just now I can only heartily agree with your assessment. And I dislike Portugal. The Team.

didn't like that rafa completely stopped trying to get his shot off and deliberately invited the foul.

This is more like it, shut those 67,000 maskless wankers up.

my word that was exquisite

vinho verdes all round

You wait all day, three come at once, etc.

Cron vs Lukaku is on

Hungary was in that for 75 minutes tho

the "this is why i'm one of the best players in the world" comment at 11:54 makes me roll my eyes, though:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t03LHpeWnpA

Intense seeing a full stadium

rui patricio so lucky. 3rd goal was beautiful and loved the initial renato sanches pass. player in the germany team i can't recall seeing in the bundesliga, gosens?. cannot believe hummels is worthy of a starting place.

Did that third goal not warrant at least a quick look at offside or was I missing something?

thought it was offside

i think it was marginal, would have liked to have seen a reply that showed it clearly

Germany having their own fullback called Chris Gunter is a hell of a flex

I could have finally found a use for the fantasy team name "climate of gunter", if I'd done one

N’Golo Kanté pour la vie.

I shouted offside at that 3rd goal but assume it must have been looked at

Psyched to get a look at these two now

Platini never sang the anthem because it's a war song and he remains otm.

This is definitely threatening to be a good game

cannot believe hummels is worthy of a starting place.

You were saying...

Whoops!

Matts humbled.

That ball from Pogba was beautiful

Still more in the balance than it ought to be maybe

A Greenpeace activist lands at Allianz Arena with a parachute prior to the match between France and Germany in Munich.

What the fuck. 😳 pic.twitter.com/5ZAPTaYaw0

— FutbolBible (@FutbolBible) June 15, 2021

Classic Greens targeting the big problem

Meanwhile Rudiger is literally trying to eat Pogba

Oof, Gnaby should have buried that.

Gnabry, Entschuldigung

Good spell by Germany

Hows that not dangerous/reckless

100% a red card

Nice of Germany to bring back the Harald Schumacher 'hip to the head' tackle.

Spirit of Harald Schumacher XPOSTS ffs

Memories of 1982 and Battiston.

haha you guys are too fast.

OK we've all had a go now

Pizza

D:

He took a little "pizza" the defender's skull there

Your favourite jokes about pizza and Euro 2020

Such a great finish

Shame that was off

Cunts rule

Pity. What a treat it was.

Took forever for the ref to whistle, like he too wanted to see what would happen.

why did they wait like 10 seconds letting him make 3 moves and scoring a great goal before calling him off lol

hummels 1, mbappe 1

damn my stream is lagging

that wasn't offside, griezmann isn't active ffs

Such a great finish

― crisp, dinsdag 15 juni 2021 22:23

getting very meta now

the audience can have a disallowed goal.... as a treat

He was well off as well, not even a VAR job

They don't want to accidentally rule stuff offside by mistake so they wait an annoyingly long time, even if it's fairly obvious

Xp

Germany look bereft of ideas. Having seen everyone play now I think Italy impressed me most, though I’m excited to see Belgium against someone who actually tries

I'm only invested in Jack Hendry cunting one in the top corner against England at this point

mbappe's pace against hummels is hilarious

Joke ref cunt

goes through him to get the ball tbf

clinical

boom

Redemption arc begins here.

Phew, great to see that:

wow ok

Ah fuck.

Crazy.

i think that france will win this tournament

Preach it.

Yeah they look the best by some distance

or scotland obviously

Italy looked pretty good too xps

thought havertz was Germany's best player 2nd half so of course loew took him off.

or scotland obviously

David Turnbull poised to take this tournament by storm.

Italy were good but maybe lack an edge, hard to tell from Turkey.

Maybe Belgium could beat France but they'd need to have a bad day to lose.

And if Belgium beat France maybe France could nuke 'em?

What are you on about?

France destroying Belgium?

tintin and milou would find a way to stop it surely

i have big questions about how much of the second half France ceded to Germany and i doubt any excuse you could muster

i think germany are no slouches either. were asking the questions quite a bit in that second half

yeah i think that's fair, that France didn't just sit back but that they were outplayed for chunks of the game, i think that casts doubts on them as being head and shoulders favourites for the tournament tho

i was going to say, i thought germany's style of play was more of an answer to what france was trying to do, if that makes sense. both teams did well to "neutralize" each other. i didn't say anything because i was afraid of being shunned by the experts in the room. i didn't watch italy play, but i agree that france, germany, and belgium are the stronger teams. possibly spain, as well, if they can actually get a decent striker. like germany, their tactic is pretty "understated" and not as flashy as france's. i also could be talking out of my ass