NEMI

ps. how do I get a Metro when I walk to work? They are discriminating against me! Also, is it acceptable to read a newpaper as you are walking down the street?

also they are discriminating against bus people by not putting metros on busses either.

ricky drop me a line if you fancy a bouze tonite, there may be possibilities.

Actually got a laugh out of me today. Well, a smile.

http://img.metro.co.uk/i/pix/cartoons/nemi/nemi_2049_600x194.gif

That previous doctored Nemi is a cartoon version of Radiohead's "Just" video. Now I'm going to go have another look at the goaste.cx archive.

No shit.

kudos to lj for picking up a mid-90s reference that passed me by.

Fuck, it's a direct transcription. I didn't realise that. Sorry 2 b obvious cat.

no i was bein srs! kind of a load off my mind, not to remember it.

I was apologising to CP, tbh. I haven't seen that Just video in ages, so the actual wording was arbitrary; the concept alone sparked my memory.

lol @ lazy eyes tho

I think Metro Nemi has changed in tone lately, and often doesn't feature Nemi:
http://img.metro.co.uk/i/pix/cartoons/nemi/nemi_2043_600x194.gif
http://img.metro.co.uk/i/pix/cartoons/nemi/nemi_2044_600x194.gif
http://img.metro.co.uk/i/pix/cartoons/nemi/nemi_2046_600x194.gif

Panel 3 is all wrong here, it's the red lips:
http://img.metro.co.uk/i/pix/cartoons/nemi/nemi_2037_600x194.gif

I didn't think it was possible for the strip to get any less funny!

Those three without Nemi are like bizarro This Life

bizarro This Life
That's what I thought.

Thirded

Actually not even bizarro, that last one, it's just This Life but drawn slightly better

tbh nemi and this life are like the far side and achewood when compared to "the omnipresent"

I think yesterday's must have lost a lot in translation:

http://img.metro.co.uk/i/pix/cartoons/nemi/nemi_2048_600x194.gif

panel 4 of the red-lipped one is terribly laid out, order of balloons is non-optimal.

yesterday's make sense to me. the earth != humanity.

Yeah I got it.

You are nuts the real metro joy is the 118 118 ads on the cartoon page.

Nooooooooooooo

I forcibly avoid them with my eyes.

I have developed back stories for the recurring characters.

"Now it's trendy to care about environment again."

?

I force myself to read the 118 118 one.

I understand the environmental one, it's just that it feels like there's stuff lost in translation. The last panel feels like a new (weak) English wordplay to make up for the Danish one not be translatable.

Norwegian, actually.

Have the early Nemi strips from the late 90's/early 00's been translated to English? The quality of the strip kinda varies these days, but it used to be constantly funny earlier.

Norwegian! Sorry. I knew that. I have Danish cartoonists on the brain.

Good lord, I just clicked through the Norwegian online archive to look that up. Judging by the few strips I read along the way, this is one lousy goddamn comic.
So, the conclusion is that no, the original strip is just as rubbish, and there's no pun or anything in the original that's lost/poorer in translation. Just another fine example of how rubbish Nemi is.
(Incidentally, for those who are curious, the strip is originally from February)

Also, good lord... check out these repeats:
http://spray.nettavisen.no/shared/nemi/img/30.11.07.gif
http://spray.nettavisen.no/shared/nemi/img/27.11.07.gif
http://spray.nettavisen.no/shared/nemi/img/22.11.07.gif
(be glad they're not translated... they're even worse than the recent stuff)

What does "evneveik" mean?

I've enjoyed many of the old Nemi strips, but those don't look like the best of the bunch.

It means "disabled"
I too recall "Nemi" being fairly entertaining early on, so hopefully those three are indeed poor specimens.

Nemi is the worst Norwegian comic ever.

Zofies Verden on the other hand! Not in English though...

Was thinking about setting up a "worst thing to be found in London free newspapers" poll. Nominations? Other than "gay russian dude's big smirking face on the gossip pages"

Londoners.

Christ, I'd have to actually start reading them again, which I refuse to do. Head-emptying doesn't do them justice.

Wait, no. The answer, beyond any doubt, is "The Omnipresent".

Neil Sean's Green Room in Metro - takes it by a country mile.

Rick Brookes' cartoons.

My nomination is Keith Barker-Mann, a journalist who appears to exist for those who find Tim Dowling too thigh-slappingly hilarious, and need something a little sedater.

The Green Room is great. Its a list of names next to something so uninteresting it cannot be libelous if it was wrong. And surely Neil Sean is a made up person.

I have a very soft spot for the fashion spot the difference in London Lite. The answer ever day is:
Lower hemline
Extra strap on shoe
Bigger handbag
Extra bracelet
+ something I never get even though I stare at it for an hour and STILL CAN'T SEE when I have read the answer. I love the implicit rules of the spot the difference though, it is only ever the clothes and accessories changed, never the background or any physical part of person (have they ever done longer hair?)

I had a letter in the Metro today. Not the London Metro, though.

Neil Sean does the best made up quotes that are actually unsayable by any person ever.

I like to let myself believe a world in which he really is confidante to the stars, and his shiny daytime-TV face an integral part of the sophisticated celebrity party scene.

"Kylie Minogue really enjoyed filming her Xmas Dr Who special. "It was fun", says the Antipodean pop princess."

Alba are you 'Tracey from Kent' who is totally and completely on Russell Brand's dick?

No. We get a different letters page up here, it's mainly about buses and rarely about Russell Brand's dick.

Neil Sean gives me horrible flashbacks to when I was writing and editing daily celebrity news and not only had to read the fucking thig everyday, but would end up sending people's stories back to them with 'you're neal seaning here, please change' written on them.

The spot the difference is really lame in London Lite - some "differences" are like "there is one fewer strand of hair in the picture on the right" or something.

worst thing: the news

Best thing today: the pictures accompanying the "I've been exchanging ....

WAIT

I had read it has "filthy emails" but actually it's "flirty emails", which makes the pictures not so funny. The puff at the bottom of the front page.

Anyway I just love the reaction shot on the girl's face and the sinister hands of the unseen filth-merchant.

The best thing today was definitely Alba's letter. He's so erudite.

The Green Room is great. Its a list of names next to something so uninteresting it cannot be libelous if it was wrong

You forgot to add that to qualify for the Green Room a story must already have appeared on at least three gossip websites or in an issue of Look magazine.

Confusingly, there was actually a letter in today's from someone signing themselves Alba. I had no idea what they were on about, but it was quite spirited.

I like these feel-good stories

http://img.metro.co.uk/i/pix/cartoons/nemi/nemi270208_600x194.gif

Why would someone who doesn't do anything freak about tax returns. Today's has her donning a disguise to avoid the tax inspector. When/how did Nemi become a wealthy tax dodger?

When/how did Nemi start making sense?

Fair point.

she probably gets paid good commission to feature in a newspaper with a couple of million readers?

xpost

She's a nondomfatcat

she probably gets paid good commission to feature in a newspaper with a couple of million readers?

That reminds me, the other week they got all meta:

http://img.metro.co.uk/i/pix/cartoons/nemi/nemi200208_600x194.gif

When/how did Nemi start making sense?

roxy you weren't thinking about nemi, you were thinking about this i think

What is he thinking??

or was it? i can't tell as your eyes are not blinking

Why would someone who doesn't do anything freak about tax returns. Today's has her donning a disguise to avoid the tax inspector. When/how did Nemi become a wealthy tax dodger?

maybe rules are different in Norway?

They're blinded by the lights. xpost

Why would someone who doesn't do anything freak about tax returns. Today's has her donning a disguise to avoid the tax inspector. When/how did Nemi become a wealthy tax dodger?
Probably since Nemi's creator became filthy rich and the tabloids wrote big stories about it.
Of course, there is a Nemi strip about how much the author hates people thinking Nemi is her. Maybe Nemi has a lot of stock in Danzig's record label or something.

The only way Nemi can afford her lifestyle is as a trustafarian, so she's probably being taxed on dividends.

http://www.b3ta.cr3ation.co.uk/data/jpg/nemi.jpg

She's not dodging tax! She just can't deal with forms.

Little detail from Wikipedia:

He is engaged to Lise Myhre, a Norwegian artist and creator of the comic "Nemi", and they have a son, Storm, born 2007.

Seems kind of...appropriate somehow.

Also, GIS on the artist reveals that she looks EXACTLY like her creation. Why is this not at all surprising.

The strip is still terrible.

some of the more recent goaste strips are superb

http://www.goaste.cx/goaste/pictures/nemi/20071012/Nemi6.PNG

An imaginary friend with bite

That's actually on a website run by the Norwegian Consulate in London. Do they figure if they don't write about Nemi they'll have to do a piece on Quisling?

Nemi is not always likeable

Do they figure if they don't write about Nemi they'll have to do a piece on Quisling?

or A-Ha lol 80s

HAR DU FYR?!?!?

I love how even asking for a light sounds kickass in Norwegian.

http://img.metro.co.uk/i/pix/cartoons/nemi/nemi2120_600x194.gif

Hehe I wondered if someone would post that when I saw it this morning.

Why are they watching an advert for the Ronaldinho bottle opener?

Hop-Hop is... the rabbit's name? But she thought he said hip-hop? Which is also playing in the big speakers? So... in the first panel he is offering to switch the rabbit to another animal?

Huge Jewel Quest screen at the back there.

xpost

I'm more concerned by that guy's arm than the racism of the piece, tbh. Has he been hit by a car earlier in the evening?

Or maybe he was beaten up by a black guy, hence Nemi's revulsion.

She actually seems to be getting worse at drawing figures, faces etc as the years go on.

OH NOES WITHOUT GUITARS

if you switch that to WITH GUITARS she could be talking about HEAVY METAL like what Nemi likes DYS?

excellent

Heavy metal = current music of choice for hipster twats

Dude, this cartoon is way off. I love all kinds of music. I love Pink Floyd and Deep Purple and The Rolling Stones and pretty much anything else you can name. Hell, I've seen Jethro Tull and Deep Purple in concert. I love it all. But to say that rap is all bad is just ignorant. You don't deserve to listen to Floyd and Zeppelin if you're going to be closed-minded.

Fact is, there is a LOT of rap. The stuff that makes it to TV is usually sh*tty, just like most other music. The other stuff, such as the ones I named above (and there are many MANY more) are usually political, satyrical, smart, philosophical, humanitarian, and interesting in general. Like the song "Color My World Mine" by Eyedea and Abilities, a song about a theory of what god really is. And "Always Coming Back Home To You" by Atmosphere, which is about growing up and remembering the past. Or even really fun stuff, like the song about Super Mario by Benefit.

Hell, there is even a whole genre of rap called Nerdcore, with artists such as MC Chris (who does voices on Cartoon Network, too) and MC Frontalot and MC Hawking... They just rap about video games and stuff like that.

So stop being so closed-minded about things you don't know. One of the best things about Floyd and Zeppelin and The Stones is that they encouraged open-mindedness, something that you have yet to achieve.

Grow up.

satyrical

why is the tv behind the couch?

that's how we do it here, level up man

satyierrrerical © Lee and Herring 1996

Half of my working week is now spent observing the cruel divide between casuals and emos, so this cartoon hits home.

http://www.goaste.cx/goaste/pictures/nemi/20080717/stab004.gif

Still got love for Goaste.

http://www.goaste.cx/goaste/pictures/nemi/20080717/stab009.gif

^^^ what the hell??

http://www.goaste.cx/goaste/nemi001.html

Nemi is a popular Norwegian comic strip. Originally translated into English for the Metro newspaper, these versions of Nemi were radically different from the Norwegian original. Here at goaste, though, we can bring you the first true English translation of this Norwegian masterpiece, restoring its disqueting atmosphere and making us see the sadness of Nemi's plight.

I was in Borders last night and noticed there is a new Nemi collection out, with an introduction by Tori Amos. The perfect xmas gift for the Dom Passantino in yr life.

The perfect xmas gift for the Dom Passantino Lex in yr life.

Fixed

The book features a sexy full page pic of a topless Nemi doing the hand-bra.

Is there actually a joke in today's? Is it that the mother is meant to look like a teddy bear? Dreadful.

http://img.metro.co.uk/i/pix/cartoons/nemi/n_2216_uk.gif

Wait, why are there two guys? Is the joke that it's a gay couple and their surrogate?

The joke is the guy on the left is wanking.

think it's that the surrogate's more of a bear than the twink gay dads?

Nemi is the drummer for the twink gay dads?

It just makes me wonder at which point in the creative process Lise Myhre decided that this "joke" made the cut? I'd hate to see her rejects pile.

Yeah yungblut's interpretation makes the most sense but even then there's basically nothing to telegraph bear or twink in the drawing so = ???

I knew this Nemi would be explained on ILX today, I had no idea what the hell the joke was about.

This is kind of service I expect.

where's nemi?

I used to have this theory that the Nemi strips just had new captions added in to them made up by some random dude for the English versions. Like the way the Magic Roundabout wasn't translated but just had new dialogue and stories put in.

But even then that wouldn't explain how bad it is.

nor does it explain where nemi's gone

i'm unemployed so haven't been reading it recently, is she no longer in the strip? Well of course she isn't in that one up there but in general.

She's still in them, she was in the last one I saw a few days ago.

Maybe she is reborn as the baby, strip has whole new lease of life, look forward to exciting times of Nemi the goth toddler.

That explains the strip above, Nemi the goth baby hates teddies but still loves her mom.

Guy refering to 'he' is just ignorant and sexist.

Goaste Nemi is still the best British webcomic ever made, and by an absolute fucking street too

Goaste George & Lynne less consistent but the gold is gold imo... I was reading Kerrang in WH Smith the other day and decided they should do 'Pandora' next

the original Pandora or her niece that started in the 90s?

Does Ray Zell still do it?

Goaste Nemi is still the best British webcomic ever made, and by an absolute fucking street too

explain how this detournement of a shit strip is better than any five selected Langridge pages plz

Maybe I should read some Langridge then :-/

Great tip on the goaste nemi sfb(cm) - clearly it actually IS possible to polish a turd.

the original Pandora or her niece that started in the 90s?

― pfunkboy (Herman G. Neuname), Wednesday, May 13, 2009 3:12 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

Does Ray Zell still do it?

― pfunkboy (Herman G. Neuname), Wednesday, May 13, 2009 3:12 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

He does and I meant the current one, that I was reading. It's basically George & Lynne but with more Paramore and less country club guests