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http://67.18.93.82/adventureimages/goblinchef.gif You're fighting a Knob Goblin Assistant Chef

This Knob Goblin is currently in training to be a chef. He proudly wields his set of Neophyte Tongs, and whistles a happy cooking song as he prepares to beat you senseless.

You hit for 4 damage. CRITICAL HIT! POW! BOOF!

You win the fight!

You gain 8 Meat.
You gain 1 Cheek.

― TRON FIGHTS FOR THE USERS (ex machina), Wednesday, 2 June 2004 11:39 (twenty-one years ago)

you dear fragile thing

― stevem (blueski), Wednesday, 2 June 2004 11:44 (twenty-one years ago)

Saucemastery

You are channelling the Magicalness and Strengthliness of the Ancient Brotherhood of Gravymakers.

― TRON FIGHTS FOR THE USERS (ex machina), Wednesday, 2 June 2004 11:47 (twenty-one years ago)

This is my new favourite thing in the whole world.

― Tag (Tag), Wednesday, 2 June 2004 14:21 (twenty-one years ago)

so much fun! I have mariachi pants!!

― TRON FIGHTS FOR THE USERS (ex machina), Wednesday, 2 June 2004 14:26 (twenty-one years ago)

uuuh, i think i just got way addicted.

its like the old BBS MUDS that i played in 8th grade!!!

― brock (brock), Wednesday, 2 June 2004 15:00 (twenty-one years ago)

but with more funny

― HAMBURGER NEURON GROUP (ex machina), Wednesday, 2 June 2004 15:02 (twenty-one years ago)

I'm a Sauceror

― HAMBURGER NEURON GROUP (ex machina), Wednesday, 2 June 2004 15:02 (twenty-one years ago)

i'm a marachi asshole. dude, have you checked out the players picture page?

http://geocities.com/quep84/ochre.jpg

― brock (brock), Wednesday, 2 June 2004 15:05 (twenty-one years ago)

easily my favorite. total beauty and the beast action.

― brock (brock), Wednesday, 2 June 2004 15:05 (twenty-one years ago)

accordian thief. thats what i am

― brock (brock), Wednesday, 2 June 2004 15:09 (twenty-one years ago)

JACK BLACK + FABIO?

― HAMBURGER NEURON GROUP (ex machina), Wednesday, 2 June 2004 15:09 (twenty-one years ago)

more bob seger + RAY LEOTA

― brock (brock), Wednesday, 2 June 2004 16:26 (twenty-one years ago)

I'm a pastamancer. Where is the ILX guild?!

― Dale the Titled (cprek), Wednesday, 2 June 2004 16:30 (twenty-one years ago)

Yea, fuck let's start one!!!

― HAMBURGER NEURON GROUP (ex machina), Wednesday, 2 June 2004 16:34 (twenty-one years ago)

I have to be like level 7 or something. I'm 3 right now.

Turns reset midnight central (US) time.

What levels are y'all at?

My name on there is "McFeely"

― HAMBURGER NEURON GROUP (ex machina), Wednesday, 2 June 2004 16:35 (twenty-one years ago)

Yeah, um, Kingfish told us about this on the TITTWISt thread many months ago. I'm a level 9 accordion thief. This is the greatest thing ever, of course.

― Casuistry (Chris P), Wednesday, 2 June 2004 16:36 (twenty-one years ago)

Casuistry, wanna make an ILX clan. What should we call it? "Excelsior"?

― HAMBURGER NEURON GROUP (ex machina), Wednesday, 2 June 2004 16:40 (twenty-one years ago)

jon, are you gay

― deanomgwtf!!!p%3Fmsgid%3D4581997 (deangulberry), Wednesday, 2 June 2004 16:43 (twenty-one years ago)

http://www.sundazed.com/main/new_item_gfx/wilco.gif

― HAMBURGER NEURON GROUP (ex machina), Wednesday, 2 June 2004 16:46 (twenty-one years ago)

WILCO ROCKS DUDE ALSO DON'T TELL IAN THAT YOU WANT TO BE FRIENDS WITH ME IT WILL CAUSE PROBLEMS ALSO DON'T LET YOUR BOSS KNOW THAT YOU ARE PROPOSITIONING MEN OVER THE INTERNET

― deanomgwtf!!!p%3Fmsgid%3D4581997 (deangulberry), Wednesday, 2 June 2004 16:52 (twenty-one years ago)

I was playing this and then the website changed and I couldn't get my password for some reason (hotmail probably filtered it as spam, I guess). I had a bugbear costume!

I'm glad it's resetting so I can start over with a new name...

― JuliaA (j_bdules), Wednesday, 2 June 2004 17:02 (twenty-one years ago)

resetting wtf?

― HAMBURGER NEURON GROUP (ex machina), Wednesday, 2 June 2004 17:46 (twenty-one years ago)

how long till it resets?

i gotta figure all this shit out man. looks like a fun ass time.

WE NEED AN ILXOR CLAN BAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAD

― brock (brock), Wednesday, 2 June 2004 18:15 (twenty-one years ago)

thanks to the SA forums, i was playing this a month or two ago. slow server times pissed me off, then i started playing Half Life again, which took again KoL time.

i'm still a level 6 Pastamancer and Disco Thief.

― Kingfish Disraeli (Kingfish), Wednesday, 2 June 2004 18:16 (twenty-one years ago)

It will be reset at 1 am EST.

Equipment:

Hat: the Dolphin King's crown (Power: 30)
Weapon: wooden stakes (Power: 25)
Pants: mariachi pants (Power: 10)
Accessory: continuum transfunctioner

Accomplishments:

You have completed your training with the Toot Oriole.
You have found the Dolphin King's treasure.

― HAMBURGER NEURON GROUP (ex machina), Wednesday, 2 June 2004 18:18 (twenty-one years ago)

Hmmm, clans give stat bonuses. The ILX hive mind must play this!

― HAMBURGER NEURON GROUP (ex machina), Wednesday, 2 June 2004 18:24 (twenty-one years ago)

for clarification:

(15:25:57) derridAhAhA: wait, its reseting tonight?
(15:26:13) WIZARD IS HUNGry: you get more turns at 1am
(15:26:18) derridAhAhA: oooo
(15:26:23) derridAhAhA: i thought the whole thing is reseting
(15:26:35) derridAhAhA: like everyone starting over again
(15:26:36) WIZARD IS HUNGry: no no

― HAMBURGER NEURON GROUP (ex machina), Wednesday, 2 June 2004 18:26 (twenty-one years ago)

McFeely
Level 3
Parsley Enchanter

Muscle: 5
Mysticality: 8
Moxie: 5
Tipsiness: 7

HP 8 / 9
MP 9 / 9

Meat 87
Turns 0

― HAMBURGER NEURON GROUP (ex machina), Wednesday, 2 June 2004 18:28 (twenty-one years ago)

ilxorox
Level 2
Cilantro Seer

Muscle: 5
Mysticality: 6
Moxie: 5
Drunkenness: 1

HP 3/7
MP 6/6
Meat 227
Turns 0

― brock (brock), Wednesday, 2 June 2004 21:24 (twenty-one years ago)

Jon, everything IS going to reset. As in everyone will be back to square one. At some point. Soonish, probably.

― Casuistry (Chris P), Wednesday, 2 June 2004 22:27 (twenty-one years ago)

cafard
Level 9
Hurdy-Gurdy Hooligan

Muscle:
71 (50)

Mysticality:
45

Moxie:
65 (68)

23 / 94

63 / 68

481

4
Last Adventure:

The Goatlet
Intrinsics:

1337p4n7Z (?)
Familiar:

Got, the 4 pound Barrrnacle

― Casuistry (Chris P), Wednesday, 2 June 2004 22:28 (twenty-one years ago)

Will KoL be reset?
Yes. The game will be reset when it comes out of beta.

What does this mean?

It means that your character will be reset to level 1. All player inventories and stores will go away. Clans will go away. Everything will go away except your name. You may or may not be allowed to keep ONE of your familiars. I haven't decided yet.

When?

I don't know. I want to finish the game. I want to make it so you can climb the beanstalk, and do your thing up there. I want you to be able to confront and defeat the Naughty Sorceress. I want all of the old gaps to be filled.

It won't be for a while. There will be a countdown on the login page for 2 weeks beforehand. It won't come as a surprise.

― deanomgwtf!!!p%3Fmsgid%3D4581997 (deangulberry), Wednesday, 2 June 2004 22:31 (twenty-one years ago)

this game is fun. but not as fun as tradewars. does anybody know any sites running tradewars on the web?

― vahid (vahid), Wednesday, 2 June 2004 22:32 (twenty-one years ago)

http://i.timeinc.net/time/potw/20010817/pork.jpg

ROADSIDE PORKTASTROPHE

― ARL (Adrian Langston), Wednesday, 2 June 2004 22:47 (twenty-one years ago)

one of my friends is writing an insane tradewars inspired games with crazy fucking planetary mechanics

― HAMBURGER NEURON GROUP (ex machina), Thursday, 3 June 2004 04:52 (twenty-one years ago)

matzohpizza (#93078)
Level 3
Frog Director
Statistics:

Current Hit Points: 10
Maximum Hit Points: 12

Current Muscularity Points: 1
Maximum Muscularity Points: 2

Muscle: 11
(19/23)

Mysticality: 4
(3/9)

Moxie: 4
(7/9)

Adventures remaining: 0
Meat: 241

Turns Played: 88

Advancement:

You must gain 2 Muscle to advance to level 4.

Equipment:

Hat: viking helmet (Power: 20)
Weapon: Knob Goblin tongs (Power: 20)
Pants: Knob Goblin pants (Power: 25)

Skills:
(click the skill name for a description)

Patience of the Tortoise

― Ian Johnson (orion), Thursday, 3 June 2004 05:37 (twenty-one years ago)

planetary mechanics??? that sounds less like tradewars and more like star control!! or is it some combo of the two?

― vahid (vahid), Thursday, 3 June 2004 07:21 (twenty-one years ago)

ok mind you my experience with tradewars boils down to the old wwiv version of tradewars, text-only, turn-based and written in pascal.

― vahid (vahid), Thursday, 3 June 2004 07:24 (twenty-one years ago)

Brocktune
Level 3
Zydeco Rogue

Muscle: 4
Mysticality: 3
Moxie: 11
Drunkenness: 15
You are falling-down drunk.

HELLZ YEA!@#$%#

― brock (brock), Thursday, 3 June 2004 14:43 (twenty-one years ago)

I couldn't get enough food or drink to get more turns. Where can I get cheap booze?

― HAMBURGER NEURON GROUP (ex machina), Thursday, 3 June 2004 14:46 (twenty-one years ago)

What do rolls do?

― HAMBURGER NEURON GROUP (ex machina), Thursday, 3 June 2004 14:50 (twenty-one years ago)

err, i know what they do.. i mean fortune cookies

― HAMBURGER NEURON GROUP (ex machina), Thursday, 3 June 2004 14:50 (twenty-one years ago)

Booze is actually kinda hard to get. Eventually you can storm the Orcish Frat House (which is where I got my current weapon, the homoerotic frat paddle) and that's probably the easiest place to win it. (So far.)

― Casuistry (Chris P), Thursday, 3 June 2004 14:55 (twenty-one years ago)

its all about the night train in the back alley

3-4 turns
3 drunkeness

― brock (brock), Thursday, 3 June 2004 15:03 (twenty-one years ago)

its all about the night train in the back alley

3-4 turns
3 drunkeness

and dude. level 4 is when shit starts. everything opens up.

― brock (brock), Thursday, 3 June 2004 15:11 (twenty-one years ago)

whoops..

― brock (brock), Thursday, 3 June 2004 15:11 (twenty-one years ago)

whoever designed this is familiar with ilx - from the list of items:

asshat

This is a hat made from two cheeks. Once you get used to the smell, it's pretty stylish.

Type: hat
Power: 30
Selling Price: 45 Meat.

Enchantment:
Stench Resistance

― zappi (joni), Thursday, 3 June 2004 15:52 (twenty-one years ago)

I started a second guy named "ROFFLE"

fuck, I got the slug lord's map and i need stench protection

― HAMBURGER NEURON GROUP (ex machina), Thursday, 3 June 2004 15:59 (twenty-one years ago)

anyone wanna buy this:

dirty hobo gloves

This is a pair of filthy hobo gloves. Their pungent stench makes them useful as a weapon.

Type: weapon
Power: 20
Selling Price: 31 Meat.

Enchantment:
+1 Stench Damage

Post your username, I'm asking like 40 meat for it.

― HAMBURGER NEURON GROUP (ex machina), Thursday, 3 June 2004 16:02 (twenty-one years ago)

Baldrick
Level 3
Zydeco Rogue
Muscle: 8
Mysticality: 8
Moxie: 8
Inebriety: 3

― Michael White (Hereward), Thursday, 3 June 2004 16:05 (twenty-one years ago)

Post your username, I'm asking like 40 meat for it.

― deanomgwtf!!!p%3Fmsgid%3D4581997 (deangulberry), Thursday, 3 June 2004 16:06 (twenty-one years ago)

I have shitloads of booze, I've mostly gotten it from the Barrel full of Barrels or whatever that's called. It's in the mountains, one of those regions that only shows up when you are at a certain level or...something. I don't know what the fuck I'm doing, I just keep fighting zmobies. (I'm at level 5 btw)

Lots of food there too. As long as you don't encounter exploding barrels or have to fight a mimic, which I've never been able to successfully do.

― JuliaA (j_bdules), Thursday, 3 June 2004 16:13 (twenty-one years ago)

Fuck, I need to level!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I think the best bet for getting booze is going to the alley

― HAMBURGER NEURON GROUP (ex machina), Thursday, 3 June 2004 16:18 (twenty-one years ago)

julia, i get my ass handed to me when i get in there. of course, i just made lvl 4, but...

hows the money in the barrells? have you gotten to degrassi knoll yet?
LETS GET A CLAN MUTHAFUx0rRS

jon, don't drink the wisky/vodka straight up.
mix vodka with tomatos to get better results

― brock (brock), Thursday, 3 June 2004 16:25 (twenty-one years ago)

I'm still level 3 on both characters

How do you mix vodka and tomatoes? Do you need a drink making kit?

― HAMBURGER NEURON GROUP (ex machina), Thursday, 3 June 2004 16:28 (twenty-one years ago)

I get my ass handed to me a lot. But if I don't have many hit points, I don't have many to lose. I just got 4 bottles of booze and a bunch of food before getting beaten up though.

I tried combining the vodka and tomato (with "combine stuff"), but it wouldn't do it.

― JuliaA (j_bdules), Thursday, 3 June 2004 16:56 (twenty-one years ago)

Julia, you need a bartending kit i think

― HAMBURGER NEURON GROUP (ex machina), Thursday, 3 June 2004 16:57 (twenty-one years ago)

yep. need a cook in a box to cook food too.
so how many people do we have from ilxor playing this now?
5-6?

― brock (brock), Thursday, 3 June 2004 17:04 (twenty-one years ago)

jon, collect

5 razor lids of youre a mage
5 webs if youre a thief
5 firecrackers if youre a warrior and take em to the gourd tower. they'l give you 35-50 base point towards your lvling statistic if you do.

― brock (brock), Thursday, 3 June 2004 17:08 (twenty-one years ago)

yea, yea i figured that out.

do turns accumulate between days?

― HAMBURGER NEURON GROUP (ex machina), Thursday, 3 June 2004 17:10 (twenty-one years ago)

yep

― brock (brock), Thursday, 3 June 2004 17:13 (twenty-one years ago)

i used up all my turns at like 2am last night. WHAT AN INTERMINABLE WAIT MOFUCKAS

― Ian Johnson (orion), Thursday, 3 June 2004 21:01 (twenty-one years ago)

Are any of you makign cocktails yet? I'm looking for some good recipes. Extra-spicy bloody marys are fun and all but I feel like I'm not thinking of something. (Gin + grapefruit is nice as well.)

― Casuistry (Chris P), Thursday, 3 June 2004 22:18 (twenty-one years ago)

oh man. tradewars. that game ruined my summer in like '95.

― bill stevens (bscrubbins), Thursday, 3 June 2004 22:35 (twenty-one years ago)

martini = gin olive
screwdriver = vodka and organge
vodka and cranberries = vodka and cranberry
whiskey sour = whiskey and lemon

― brock (brock), Thursday, 3 June 2004 22:41 (twenty-one years ago)

Oh, I haven't tried the whiskey sour (I only had a lime for the longest time).

I keep wanting to do something with the goat's milk.

I'm also sad that beer + whiskey != boilermaker. Sigh.

― Casuistry (Chris P), Thursday, 3 June 2004 23:49 (twenty-one years ago)

I'm only at level 4 now but i'll join an ilx clan if someone sets one up.

― marianna, Friday, 4 June 2004 08:19 (twenty-one years ago)

Finally, level 4!

McFeely
Level 4
Sage Sage
Muscle: 7
Mysticality: 13
Moxie: 7

― HAMBURGER NEURON GROUP (ex machina), Friday, 4 June 2004 11:44 (twenty-one years ago)

everyone still stoked on this game??? 4 characters at lvl 4, i sure as shit am.

― brock (brock), Friday, 4 June 2004 20:34 (twenty-one years ago)

i only have one character at level four. i gotta kill more shit at 1am!!!!

― Ian Johnson (orion), Friday, 4 June 2004 20:45 (twenty-one years ago)

you can do the gourd tower more than once!!! so stoked on that

― brock (brock), Friday, 4 June 2004 20:55 (twenty-one years ago)

there are websites out there detailing all the recipes and all the quests.

shit, i can't find them right now.

― Kingfish Disraeli (Kingfish), Friday, 4 June 2004 22:08 (twenty-one years ago)

dont cheat!@!@$#@#$#$
well cheat if you start up a clan ILXOR

― brock (brock), Friday, 4 June 2004 22:59 (twenty-one years ago)

I just figured out that you can't just keep having adventures over and over again.

I have now decimated my adventure ability.

― Curt1s St3ph3ns, Friday, 4 June 2004 23:06 (twenty-one years ago)

heh, AKA "day 1" (I did the same)

― Sean Thomas (sgthomas), Friday, 4 June 2004 23:07 (twenty-one years ago)

got a leprechan. stoked.

― brock (brock), Saturday, 5 June 2004 04:57 (twenty-one years ago)

I just set up clan ILXOR, come join.

― alanbanana, Saturday, 5 June 2004 07:28 (twenty-one years ago)

Er... how does one join a guild?

― Curt1s St3ph3ns, Saturday, 5 June 2004 10:28 (twenty-one years ago)

nice. all six of my characters are joining.

― brock (brock), Saturday, 5 June 2004 14:47 (twenty-one years ago)

alan let me know what i can do to get the clan rollin. besides getting wads of cash.

― brock (brock), Saturday, 5 June 2004 15:05 (twenty-one years ago)

If you are on level 3 or higher, go to the clan district and search for ILXOR then apply.

― alan banana (alan_banana), Saturday, 5 June 2004 19:37 (twenty-one years ago)

Grr, you are a higher level than me! I was hoping to be the Grand Poobah for once! Grr!

― Casuistry (Chris P), Saturday, 5 June 2004 19:40 (twenty-one years ago)

I am a Frog Boss (level 6). Joined the clan--thanks for the ice-cold beer!

― JuliaA (j_bdules), Saturday, 5 June 2004 19:53 (twenty-one years ago)

I just applied (username = SevenXVIII)

― Curt1s St3ph3ns, Saturday, 5 June 2004 19:56 (twenty-one years ago)

What are you guys doing to level quickly?

― HAMBURGER NEURON GROUP (ex machina), Saturday, 5 June 2004 20:39 (twenty-one years ago)

Nothing much, I've just been playing for a while.

― Casuistry (Chris P), Saturday, 5 June 2004 20:57 (twenty-one years ago)

Mostly lately I've been looking for ways to beef up my Strengthliness so I can use this keen weapon I have.

― Casuistry (Chris P), Saturday, 5 June 2004 20:58 (twenty-one years ago)

I am trying to get more moxie so I can wear a trucker hat

― HAMBURGER NEURON GROUP (ex machina), Saturday, 5 June 2004 21:04 (twenty-one years ago)

i applied to the claaann. my name is matzohpizza.

― Ian Johnson (orion), Saturday, 5 June 2004 21:06 (twenty-one years ago)

You could eat a lot of moxie weed.

― Casuistry (Chris P), Saturday, 5 June 2004 22:00 (twenty-one years ago)

where will i get the meat for the weed?

― HAMBURGER NEURON GROUP (ex machina), Saturday, 5 June 2004 22:17 (twenty-one years ago)

You'll have to sneak past the accountants.

― Casuistry (Chris P), Saturday, 5 June 2004 22:41 (twenty-one years ago)

I bought a Hobo-Flex machine for the clan. It raises Muscle. I will buy the machines for moxie and mysticality tomorrow.

― alan banana (alan_banana), Saturday, 5 June 2004 23:39 (twenty-one years ago)

Sweet!

― Casuistry (Chris P), Saturday, 5 June 2004 23:42 (twenty-one years ago)

I'm adding some crap to the clan goodie bag, go crazy-go-nuts!

― Casuistry (Chris P), Saturday, 5 June 2004 23:51 (twenty-one years ago)

omfg who just gave me ice cold beer i love you

― HAMBURGER NEURON GROUP (ex machina), Sunday, 6 June 2004 02:10 (twenty-one years ago)

argh why is only one of my characters in the clan????

― HAMBURGER NEURON GROUP (ex machina), Sunday, 6 June 2004 02:51 (twenty-one years ago)

http://www.agesoftime.com/kol/index.php

a helpful little page.

― Kingfish Disraeli (Kingfish), Sunday, 6 June 2004 06:13 (twenty-one years ago)

It kinda gives a little too much away, maybe.

― Casuistry (Chris P), Sunday, 6 June 2004 06:33 (twenty-one years ago)

Oh, I got level 3. I'm appying (user=fartfarmer). it's like high sports all over again. will I make it? will I make it?

― gizmo (gizmo), Sunday, 6 June 2004 07:56 (twenty-one years ago)

also, what do people typically do with all the accumulated junk in your inventory? I realize some things have uses further down the line. And some don't. But do I really need 3 of something? Oh, the mental calisthenics.

― Fritz B (gizmo), Sunday, 6 June 2004 08:15 (twenty-one years ago)

are you meant to fight people and stuff?

― cozen (Cozen), Sunday, 6 June 2004 12:33 (twenty-one years ago)

and whats with that war room? do clans have big fights n stuff?

― zappi (joni), Sunday, 6 June 2004 13:01 (twenty-one years ago)

I LOVE THIS GAME AND I LOVE MY LITTLE FUCKIN LEPRACHAUN THAT MAKES ME SO MUCH GREEN HELL YEZ

― brock (brock), Sunday, 6 June 2004 18:05 (twenty-one years ago)

My mosquito was cool, but then I decided to try out the other familiars. I've got the barnicle now, which is not too shabby, but the fuzzy dice really fun.

― Casuistry (Chris P), Sunday, 6 June 2004 21:04 (twenty-one years ago)

http://67.18.114.242/otherimages/fratboycostume.gif

ROFFLE (#93466)
Level 5
Penguin Frightener
Statistics:

Current Hit Points: 0
Maximum Hit Points: 27

Current Muscularity Points: 0
Maximum Muscularity Points: 8

Muscle: 28 (base: 26)
(20/53)

Mysticality: 10
(3/21)

Moxie: 11
(2/23)

Inebriety: 16 (falling-down drunk)
Adventures remaining: 0
Meat: 37

Turns Played: 432

Advancement:

You must gain 3 Muscle to advance to level 6.

Equipment:

Hat: Orcish baseball cap (Power: 40)
Weapon: homoerotic frat-paddle (Power: 70)
Pants: Orcish cargo shorts (Power: 40)
Accessory: continuum transfunctioner
Outfit: Frat Boy Ensemble

Effects:

Seal Clubbing Frenzy (212)

Skills:
(click the skill name for a description)

Seal Clubbing Frenzy

Current Familiar:

Dylan, the 3 pound Leprechaun (13 kills)

Accomplishments:

You have completed your training with the Toot Oriole.
You have helped defend the Gourd

― HAMBURGER NEURON GROUP (ex machina), Wednesday, 9 June 2004 13:03 (twenty-one years ago)

McFeely (#90822)
Level 5
Rosemary Diviner
Statistics:

Current Hit Points: 8
Maximum Hit Points: 34 (base: 26)

Current Mana Points: 0
Maximum Mana Points: 34

Muscle: 15 (base: 10)
(11/21)

Mysticality: 26 (base: 25)
(22/51)

Moxie: 18 (base: 13)
(19/27)

Inebriety: 15 (falling-down drunk)
Adventures remaining: 0
Meat: 57

Turns Played: 534

Advancement:

You must gain 4 Mysticality to advance to level 6.

Equipment:

Hat: foolscap fool's cap (Power: 40)
Weapon: spooky stick (Power: 30)
Pants: white satin pants (Power: 40)
Accessory: charrrm bracelet
Accessory: walrus-tusk earring
Accessory: gnoll-tooth necklace

Effects:

Saucemastery (636)

Skills:
(click the skill name for a description)

Sauce Contemplation

Current Familiar:

Audrey, the 4 pound Leprechaun (24 kills)

Accomplishments:

You have completed your training with the Toot Oriole.
You have helped defend the Gourd
You have found the Dolphin King's treasure.

― HAMBURGER NEURON GROUP (ex machina), Wednesday, 9 June 2004 13:04 (twenty-one years ago)

10,000 meat!!!!!

― HAMBURGER NEURON GROUP (ex machina), Wednesday, 9 June 2004 13:32 (twenty-one years ago)

Okay, I just got on this biyotch. Fridisculous Towndrel, Sauceror. Level 2. Working on changing that.

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Wednesday, 9 June 2004 14:14 (twenty-one years ago)

nickalicious, I am sending you a present.

― HAMBURGER NEURON GROUP (ex machina), Wednesday, 9 June 2004 14:39 (twenty-one years ago)

from both of my characters

― HAMBURGER NEURON GROUP (ex machina), Wednesday, 9 June 2004 14:46 (twenty-one years ago)

WOAH DUDE THANKS JON! I AM NOW 3 POINTS MORE DRUNKENDER AND CAN SMASH KNOB DUDERS WITH PLUNGER AWESOME!

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Wednesday, 9 June 2004 14:47 (twenty-one years ago)

Did the salty dog give you strength points or anything cool?
I got a cocktailcrafting kit and an oven so expect me to be making fancy drinks for clan ILXORRRR!

― HAMBURGER NEURON GROUP (ex machina), Wednesday, 9 June 2004 14:51 (twenty-one years ago)

I think it gave me a couple strengthliness points!

I'm out of turns now.

Fridisculous Towndrel (#101380)
Level 2
Cilantro Seer
Statistics:

Current Hit Points: 3
Maximum Hit Points: 8

Current Mana Points: 6
Maximum Mana Points: 7

Muscle: 5
(6/11)

Mysticality: 7
(8/15)

Moxie: 6
(3/13)

Tipsiness: 12 (pretty drunk)
Adventures remaining: 0
Meat: 107

Turns Played: 97

Advancement:

You must gain 1 Mysticality to advance to level 3.

Equipment:

Hat: the Dolphin King's crown (Power: 30)
Weapon: Gnollish plunger (Power: 35)
Pants: Knob Goblin pants (Power: 25)
Accessory: continuum transfunctioner

Skills:
(click the skill name for a description)

Sauce Contemplation

Accomplishments:

You have completed your training with the Toot Oriole.
You have found the Dolphin King's treasure.

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Wednesday, 9 June 2004 15:10 (twenty-one years ago)

how do i use my chef-skull-in-a-box?

― HAMBURGER NEURON GROUP (ex machina), Wednesday, 9 June 2004 15:23 (twenty-one years ago)

ok i combined it with my oven

You place the chef-in-the-box at your campsite. He makes himself at home.

― HAMBURGER NEURON GROUP (ex machina), Wednesday, 9 June 2004 15:24 (twenty-one years ago)

I AM THE BEST COOK EVAAAAAAAAAAAR

bat haggis

This is a haggis made out of some batgut. It looks tastier than some of the other haggis (haggises?) you've seen, but that's not saying much.

bat wing kabob

This is a kabob made out of a skewered bat wing. It looks pretty tasty.

― HAMBURGER NEURON GROUP (ex machina), Wednesday, 9 June 2004 15:32 (twenty-one years ago)

someone put some spices or batwings in the stash if you can

― HAMBURGER NEURON GROUP (ex machina), Wednesday, 9 June 2004 15:48 (twenty-one years ago)

rat appendix-kabob

This is a skewer with several chunks of roasted rat appendix on it. Smells delicious.

― HAMBURGER NEURON GROUP (ex machina), Wednesday, 9 June 2004 15:59 (twenty-one years ago)

As soon as I level I'll join up and put some spice in there or something.

"Wolfman's got nards!"

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Wednesday, 9 June 2004 16:32 (twenty-one years ago)

Okay I totally started another character (Sir Loin of Beef, Turtle Tamer, Lvl 3) and just put in my clan ILXOR request-to-join dealie. I can't believe I've already run out of turns with another character. Don't let me start any more!

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Wednesday, 9 June 2004 17:03 (twenty-one years ago)

wait till later when you have elaborate daily regimins of alcohol and food

― HAMBURGER NEURON GROUP (ex machina), Wednesday, 9 June 2004 17:09 (twenty-one years ago)

ha ha I want to buy this so bad:

http://67.18.114.242/itemimages/amulet.gif
Amulet of Extreme Plot Significance

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Wednesday, 9 June 2004 17:18 (twenty-one years ago)

nickalicious! i have it! it rulezzz

Amulet of Extreme Plot Significance

This little trinket was probably really important to the plot of one story or another. Y'know, like it turned out to be the key to some generator room in which some final conflict takes place, or maybe it contains the spirit of a dead race of extremely wise and powerful magician people, or something. You could probably pawn this for quite a bit of Meat.

Type: accessory
Mysticality Required: 20
Selling Price: 250 Meat.

Enchantment:
Maximum MP +30

― HAMBURGER NEURON GROUP (ex machina), Wednesday, 9 June 2004 17:24 (twenty-one years ago)

I have tried to make bat wing kabobs and it didn't seem to work, wtf?

― Casuistry (Chris P), Wednesday, 9 June 2004 19:21 (twenty-one years ago)

Casuistry: You need an oven, a skewer thing and a bat wing

― HAMBURGER NEURON GROUP (ex machina), Wednesday, 9 June 2004 19:44 (twenty-one years ago)

Yes, but I've had all of those since long before you started playing. And have tried to cook them up together.

― Casuistry (Chris P), Wednesday, 9 June 2004 19:48 (twenty-one years ago)

do you have a chef in a box?

― HAMBURGER NEURON GROUP (ex machina), Wednesday, 9 June 2004 19:52 (twenty-one years ago)

No. Also I don't have a leprechaun.

― Casuistry (Chris P), Wednesday, 9 June 2004 21:07 (twenty-one years ago)

I don't understand how some of you clansmen have oodles of stats, but have only been going a few days (or hundred adventures) more than me (fartfarmer, and also cankergirl). What am I missing here? I seem to spend my 43 turns with incredible ease, but am not exceptionally better off for it.

Also, anyone been PvPing. I started just for the hell of it, cause I didn't know what I was missing. When you first askto fite peoples, the random few peopel closest too me all seem to be super powerful. It claims that they are on level 4 too, but they have items and stats that could not be attained otherwise (also, when I was on level 2, someof the other level 2's were already in clans, wtf?).

puzzled?

― gizmo (gizmo), Thursday, 10 June 2004 07:53 (twenty-one years ago)

Does anybody know what a Spooky Sapling does? Can I grow it into a familiar?

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Thursday, 10 June 2004 13:34 (twenty-one years ago)

nick, get the spooky fertilizer and the spooky temple map

use the map.

― HAMBURGER NEURON GROUP (ex machina), Thursday, 10 June 2004 13:35 (twenty-one years ago)

OKILEY DOKILEY DO

I put a spices in the clan ilxor crockpot.

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Thursday, 10 June 2004 13:42 (twenty-one years ago)

cool, lemme make some food

― HAMBURGER NEURON GROUP (ex machina), Thursday, 10 June 2004 13:44 (twenty-one years ago)

Can you make food with Meat From Yesterday?

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Thursday, 10 June 2004 13:46 (twenty-one years ago)

does it say "cooking item" in description?

I didn't have anytihng I could spice, but there are some rat-kidney-kabobs for the taking. YUM

― HAMBURGER NEURON GROUP (ex machina), Thursday, 10 June 2004 13:48 (twenty-one years ago)

clan ILXOR, please accept meerwulf the pastamancer. I have spices!

― Dale the Titled (cprek), Thursday, 10 June 2004 14:00 (twenty-one years ago)

CANNOT FIND SERVER

WEAK

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Thursday, 10 June 2004 15:27 (twenty-one years ago)

grrrrrrrrrr

― brock (brock), Thursday, 10 June 2004 15:47 (twenty-one years ago)

seriously, i'm fiendin for turns

― brock (brock), Thursday, 10 June 2004 15:57 (twenty-one years ago)

Aren't we all?

Ok, so I'm guessing that I needs to eat and drink more. Lots more I guess to bump up stats.

By the way, I've got many a wad of dough and knob sausage, but no tomato to make pizza with. What is a poor accordian thief to do? Where have all the tomatos in the kingdom gone? I had 2-3 back when I was a lowly lev1er.

And finally, does the gourd only want one type of item per class ever? or will they suddenly be bugging me for some of those damn can lids? Anyone?

― gizmo (gizmo), Thursday, 10 June 2004 16:06 (twenty-one years ago)

Yeah I think it's class specific. He requested can lids from my sauceror and knob goblin firecrackers from my turtle tamer.

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Thursday, 10 June 2004 16:08 (twenty-one years ago)

And webs/firecrackers from me (accordian thief/seal clubber). Ok. Guess I can relinquish any can lids I get to appropriate peeps/clan stash. I'd start a mystic too just to get the trilogy, but this consumes enough of my time as it is.

― gizmo (gizmo), Thursday, 10 June 2004 16:12 (twenty-one years ago)

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Warning: mysql_num_rows(): supplied argument is not a valid MySQL result resource in /home/jick/htdocs/login.php on line 125

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― nickalicious (nickalicious), Thursday, 10 June 2004 17:14 (twenty-one years ago)

There are (obviously) some problems right now -- I'm working on it.
- Jick

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Thursday, 10 June 2004 17:16 (twenty-one years ago)

I now have a chef-in-a-box. I didn't spend nearly enough time in the tower when I was at that level. Also, I'm now level 10! Yay.

― Casuistry (Chris P), Thursday, 10 June 2004 17:20 (twenty-one years ago)

IT'S BACK UP YAY

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Thursday, 10 June 2004 17:38 (twenty-one years ago)

I put a tomato in the stash, gizmo.

― JuliaA (j_bdules), Thursday, 10 June 2004 18:03 (twenty-one years ago)

JuliaA, I am making a pizza.

― HAMBURGER NEURON GROUP (ex machina), Thursday, 10 June 2004 18:11 (twenty-one years ago)

ok, there's a pizza there for JuliaA or whomever wants it

― HAMBURGER NEURON GROUP (ex machina), Thursday, 10 June 2004 18:24 (twenty-one years ago)

Aw. I didn't mean ta beg. Just wondering where they all went. I've been wailing on those master chefs, getting the dough and sausage/mushroom, but no tomato. Like I too good for the tomato or something. haha.

― gizmo (gizmo), Thursday, 10 June 2004 21:19 (twenty-one years ago)

I just popped 5 tomatoes into the stash. I'd love it if some kind of cheese showed up.

― Casuistry (Chris P), Thursday, 10 June 2004 22:06 (twenty-one years ago)

I had some goat cheese but ate it before this talk of pizza started. Oh well.

― JuliaA (j_bdules), Thursday, 10 June 2004 22:31 (twenty-one years ago)

I've some cottage cheese, if that will do? Got some anti-cheese, do you?

In other news, my poor cankergirl multi seems to have been rejected from the clan. *sob* first college, now this.

― gizmo (gizmo), Thursday, 10 June 2004 23:08 (twenty-one years ago)

do yourselves a favor and cook fairy gravy with knob mushroom to get the fairy gravy fairy familiar. drops extra items. take it to the kitchen and get tons and tons of ingredients. sell em/use em/give money to the clan. we got attacked! lets get defenses up!

― brock (brock), Thursday, 10 June 2004 23:09 (twenty-one years ago)

cottage cheeze + anticheese = small cottage for campground. gives you more hp/mp recovery.

― brock (brock), Thursday, 10 June 2004 23:10 (twenty-one years ago)

whose the master chef-in-a-box of the clan? I'd do the cooking myself, but I heart my precious turns so. I've got 4 wads o dough and 3 knob sausages to combine with clan tomatos for some very meaty pizza to make me go boom. I'll heart you. Is it better to direct message or clan stash things?

What's the deal with the clan wars? That is so above my head at the moment. Methinks I've not much to giveth.

― gizmo (gizmo), Thursday, 10 June 2004 23:19 (twenty-one years ago)

I always drop all my food ingredients into the stash, as i cannot yet make foods for myself/others.

this game is still the best ever.

― Ian c=====8 (orion), Thursday, 10 June 2004 23:28 (twenty-one years ago)

I have ridiculous amounts of anticheese, and I've been looking for cheese to play with it for a while, with no luck.

― Casuistry (Chris P), Thursday, 10 June 2004 23:30 (twenty-one years ago)

You haven't bought an oven yet? There are a bunch of meat stacks ( = 100 meat ) in the stash if you can't afford one yet...

― Casuistry (Chris P), Thursday, 10 June 2004 23:32 (twenty-one years ago)

And yes, cottage cheese would be very nice.

― Casuistry (Chris P), Thursday, 10 June 2004 23:34 (twenty-one years ago)

Do we just need meat to buy clan warfare items? I can start beating people up for meat rather than stats. I'm sad that my PvP record is blemished so soon with a loss. I was like 7-0 for a while (yo Adrien! Take that Mr. T!).

xpost to myself above: many a high-level multi has apparently been beaten down via PvP to very low levels and abandoned. I guess previous to being on the wrong side of a can of whoop-ass from their higher lev multis, they had joined clans (some are still getting 500 meat a day) and had nice items.

blah.

― gizmo (gizmo), Thursday, 10 June 2004 23:36 (twenty-one years ago)

one bowl of cheese coming up.

― gizmo (gizmo), Thursday, 10 June 2004 23:37 (twenty-one years ago)

I so am not about PvP. I don't really get the clan warfare aspect.

― Casuistry (Chris P), Thursday, 10 June 2004 23:38 (twenty-one years ago)

Yeah. Basically, from what I can tell, PvP has been used as a supercheat for many of the superpowers of KoL. I started it yesterday just for the hell of it. If you win, it builds up stats mighty fast.

― gizmo (gizmo), Thursday, 10 June 2004 23:42 (twenty-one years ago)

Apparently my house is nicer than the cottage! Oh well!

Does anticheese work with goat cheese?

― Casuistry (Chris P), Thursday, 10 June 2004 23:44 (twenty-one years ago)

yeah, giving you a goat familiar

I'll take the cottage? I've got a lame tent at the moment and keep getting my ass totally kicked by the bat amongst other things. Power me up scotty is what i needs.

― gizmo (gizmo), Thursday, 10 June 2004 23:52 (twenty-one years ago)

where did you get a house?

― gizmo (gizmo), Thursday, 10 June 2004 23:53 (twenty-one years ago)

apparently you can get all the goat stuff from the goatlet. whatever/whereever that is

― gizmo (gizmo), Thursday, 10 June 2004 23:58 (twenty-one years ago)

I think I got a house when I went on the text adventure.

I played the goatlet a few times (it's at the bottom of that very big mountain) recently and it wasn't giving anything up. Blah!

Also: How do I get a leprechaun?

Though I am pretty happy with my mosquito.

― Casuistry (Chris P), Friday, 11 June 2004 04:18 (twenty-one years ago)

Also, what's the point of the tattoos?

― Casuistry (Chris P), Friday, 11 June 2004 04:24 (twenty-one years ago)

aight

leprechaun is super easy. get a ten leave clover from either the vacation to the shore or through the hermit when he has them. take the clover to spooky forest and you'll get a bowl of lucky charms. eat the charms and you'll usually get a lep hatchling. do it a few times if you dont get it right off the bat.

house comes through the text adventure from the leaflet you get from the council of loathing. email me if you want a dirty cheat that gets you mad stat points. dont want to put it on ilxor cause motha fuckas be mad cheatin!!!

― brock (brock), Friday, 11 June 2004 04:55 (twenty-one years ago)

Or, go play some classic text adventures and you'll know immediately what to do.

I was happy that the "other" cheat was recognized, although it didn't win me the mad skill points it should have.

― Casuistry (Chris P), Friday, 11 June 2004 05:23 (twenty-one years ago)

Got me a fiary on me last turn last night. It hasn't done ANYTHING for me yet (3 lbs and rising).

xpost - tattoos be just for funnin' far as I can tell. But then again, I've only got the two. blah. me a lowly 4th grader.

― gizmo (gizmo), Friday, 11 June 2004 08:22 (twenty-one years ago)

I'm only on level 5 now but if I start getting crazy amounts of anything I'll chuck it into the clan stores.

― marianna, Friday, 11 June 2004 08:34 (twenty-one years ago)

make sure you all type "xyzzy" in the text adventure

― HAMBURGER NEURON GROUP (ex machina), Friday, 11 June 2004 11:17 (twenty-one years ago)

lev5 is me too, just barely. A chef-in-the-box has i. message me (fart...) if a free cook needs you.

― gizmo (gizmo), Friday, 11 June 2004 11:35 (twenty-one years ago)

I just stashed a bunch of stuff, including a shrunken head and dried faces (I have no idea what these do).

― Dale the Titled (cprek), Friday, 11 June 2004 12:04 (twenty-one years ago)

also spices!

― Dale the Titled (cprek), Friday, 11 June 2004 12:05 (twenty-one years ago)

Okay guys I (v2.0 aka Sir Loin Of Beef) put some foodstuffs & nonfoodstuffs in the ilx communal crockpot (tomato, taco shells, lord only knows what else...a dried face I think?), and am now starting to attempt to figure out the meatsmithing thing. I've so far made a basic meat sword and tried using linoleum ore to augment it, but got nothing. But yeah, once I get it figured out I'll do some mad meatsmithing for clan ilxor!

Another thing: I'm at level 4, and all these fucking creatures be doing mad damage to me, what the fuck? Like, a drunken rat just killed me dead in two turns!

I love being away for a few days and coming back to like 170+ turns. And then using them all up in like one hour.

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Monday, 14 June 2004 13:03 (twenty-one years ago)

It's shit like this why I love this game:

http://67.18.114.242/itemimages/kabob.gif
shroomkabob

This is a Knoll mushroom cooked on a skewer. It smells much better than an uncooked Knoll mushroom, though that isn't saying much.

Y'know, for a sentence that wasn't saying much, that sentence certainly had the word "much" in it a bunch of times. Or twice.

Type: food
Selling Price: 30 Meat.

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Monday, 14 June 2004 13:13 (twenty-one years ago)

A'ight e'erbudy in clan ilxor gettin tipsy, er, e'erbody needs to contribute some meat so we can get back up to 50K, cuz that whole 500 a day thang yo! My other me (Fridisculous Towndrel) done did just contribute like 1K! That's a lot for a lowly little level 4 like moi!

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Monday, 14 June 2004 13:16 (twenty-one years ago)

ait, what 500 a day thing?

― Jon in R'lyeh (ex machina), Monday, 14 June 2004 14:29 (twenty-one years ago)

There was plenty of meat in there earlier - I guess someone bought a lot of cinder blocks or something w/ the clan funds. I just contributed a bunch of meat anyway.

― marianna, Monday, 14 June 2004 14:38 (twenty-one years ago)

Or sent everyone beer. Lots of beer. :)

― marianna, Monday, 14 June 2004 14:39 (twenty-one years ago)

sorry guys!

― Jon in R'lyeh (ex machina), Monday, 14 June 2004 14:40 (twenty-one years ago)

For people that still need to make themselves cars to go to the shore, there's some car parts that I've donated. I amassed too many due to a really stupid misunderstanding (you don't need four tires and rims, they're *sets* of tires, gah) and so ended up spending up way too much meat on stuff I didn't end up needing.

― JuliaA (j_bdules), Monday, 14 June 2004 14:56 (twenty-one years ago)

I put all the meat that I had left into the funds! We are at 45K so I fully expect everyone else to contribute to get us back up to 50K by then end of today. I made a clockwork maid yesterday! I hope to make a chef-in-the-box tomorrow.

― marianna, Monday, 14 June 2004 14:58 (twenty-one years ago)

what's the 500 meat thing? Also, people try pawning items from the stash in the flea market

― Jon in R'lyeh (ex machina), Monday, 14 June 2004 15:02 (twenty-one years ago)

You should get an extra 500 meat per day in your own personal meat stach because of there being 50K meat in the clan stash.

― marianna, Monday, 14 June 2004 15:05 (twenty-one years ago)

oh fuck, sorry dudes!

― Jon in R'lyeh (ex machina), Monday, 14 June 2004 15:07 (twenty-one years ago)

"Only properly trained Seal Clubbers can smith this item."

WTF FUCK YOU KoL I WANT TO MAKE LINOLEUM SWORD!

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Monday, 14 June 2004 15:59 (twenty-one years ago)

I didn't know that about the clan stash! I just contributed everything I had, which isn't much. Somebody should set up a mall store if they're the right level. The (unnecessary, it turned out) sweet rims I bought at the mall were like 2000 meat each, and there are two of those (combined with tires) in the clan stash...

― JuliaA (j_bdules), Monday, 14 June 2004 16:17 (twenty-one years ago)

oh no!

― Jon in R'lyeh (ex machina), Monday, 14 June 2004 16:18 (twenty-one years ago)

What all do I need to make the car? Rims and tires? Or do the cog/sprocket/etc have anything to do with it?

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Monday, 14 June 2004 16:21 (twenty-one years ago)

nick:

sprocket + spring + cog + meat tank + wheels + rims + a meat stack

― Jon in R'lyeh (ex machina), Monday, 14 June 2004 16:22 (twenty-one years ago)

Cog/sprocket/spring too. You'll get a degrassi knoll list when you're at the right level or whatever. Or after you visit the Council of Loathing maybe. You get most of the stuff from adventures--the only thing I couldn't find were rims, so I went out and bought too many, arrgh.

And lots of meat paste to put it all together!

― JuliaA (j_bdules), Monday, 14 June 2004 16:23 (twenty-one years ago)

I've already gotten the cog, sprocket, and spring from Degrassi Knoll, so yay I'm on the right track!

Monsters be killing the fuck out of me, what the shit? How's a drunk fucking rat gonna do like a flabillion damage to a mofo?

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Monday, 14 June 2004 16:28 (twenty-one years ago)

I just bought the dense meat stack from the stash and converted it to meat and gave 1000 meat to the clan taking a 500 karma hit :****((

Your Clan Coffer contains 50872 Meat.

― Jon in R'lyeh (ex machina), Monday, 14 June 2004 16:35 (twenty-one years ago)

HATAZ AINT SHIT JON WILLYUMZ IS THE MANG

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Monday, 14 June 2004 16:38 (twenty-one years ago)

Oo, spices.

OK, how do you get the fairy?

Whoever has been taking advantage of the salty dog bug (I assume?): Woot.

― Casuistry (Chris P), Monday, 14 June 2004 16:50 (twenty-one years ago)

to get rims cheaply :
buy chewing gum on string
go to sewer & get worthless trinket
get hermit pass
go to mountain & visit hermit
he will swap worthless trinket for sweet rims!
combine various things to get car

― zappi (joni), Monday, 14 June 2004 16:50 (twenty-one years ago)

what's the deal with the salty dogs?

― Jon in R'lyeh (ex machina), Monday, 14 June 2004 16:52 (twenty-one years ago)

I'm not sure, but I've heard there's some bug involved with them and thus they are common. Also, tasty.

― Casuistry (Chris P), Monday, 14 June 2004 16:56 (twenty-one years ago)

I drank a salty dog (IRL) on Friday night; they are yummy!

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Monday, 14 June 2004 17:26 (twenty-one years ago)

Shit, I wish I'd known that about rims!

― JuliaA (j_bdules), Monday, 14 June 2004 17:29 (twenty-one years ago)

OK WTF THIS IS REALLY PISSING ME OFF I'VE JUST BURNED THROUGH 200+ TURNS (TWO CHARACTERS) AND HAVE NOT SCORED A SINGLE POINT OF DAMAGE AGAINST ANY OPPONENT WHATSOFUCKINGEVER MEANWHILE DRUNKEN FUCKING RATS IN THE TYPICAL TAVERN BE DOING NINE DAMAGE TO A MUFUCKER FUCK!

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Monday, 14 June 2004 18:56 (twenty-one years ago)

nick, have you worked out at the knoll

― Jon in R'lyeh (ex machina), Monday, 14 June 2004 19:01 (twenty-one years ago)

I AM AT DEGRASSI KNOLL AND IT'S GOING LIKE THIS:

- FIGHT GNOLLISH BODYBUILDER/TIREJUGGLER/ETC., MISS, GET HIT FOR 7-9 DAMAGE
- SAME THING AGAIN
- HEAL THINESELF
- REPEAT UNTIL ALL TURNS EXHAUSTED AND NOTHING HAS BEEN GAINED

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Monday, 14 June 2004 19:04 (twenty-one years ago)

Maybe you need a better weapon?

― Casuistry (Chris P), Monday, 14 June 2004 20:06 (twenty-one years ago)

nick, go somewhere easier. what is your weapon now? what is yr strength?

― Jon in R'lyeh (ex machina), Monday, 14 June 2004 20:06 (twenty-one years ago)

i'm killin shit on the icy peek
loody faced volleyball given me between 11-17 mysteriousness points a kilL!

― brock (brock), Monday, 14 June 2004 20:20 (twenty-one years ago)

I can't seem to do any damage to the yeti except indirectly. It's pissing me off. I fought a yeti for 30 attacks and a message came up saying the fight was over because it had gone on for such a ridiculously long time. (The only way I can do damage is if it damages me and my pointiness spell throws it back at it -- but it's not good at hitting me anymore either.)

― Casuistry (Chris P), Monday, 14 June 2004 20:31 (twenty-one years ago)

Where can I get a meat tank?

― Michael White (Hereward), Monday, 14 June 2004 21:31 (twenty-one years ago)

OMG YAY I AM FIGURING OUT TEH MEATSMITHING!

Some things can apparently only be meatsmithed by a Seal Clubber, but my Turtle Tamer just did a Kentucky Fried Meatsword YAY. As soon as I come up with some more herbs/spices, I'll make some Kentucky Fried Meatweapons fer clan ILXOR.

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Tuesday, 15 June 2004 14:34 (twenty-one years ago)

Sir Loin Of Beef (#101565)
Level 4
Gecko Supervisor
Statistics:

Current Hit Points: 12
Maximum Hit Points: 17

Current Muscularity Points: 6
Maximum Muscularity Points: 6

Muscle: 23 (base: 16)
(9/33)

Mysticality: 8
(9/17)

Moxie: 10
(7/21)

Tipsiness: 8 (somewhat drunk)
Adventures remaining: 0
Meat: 13

Turns Played: 370

Advancement:

You must gain 4 Muscle to advance to level 5.

Equipment:

Hat: mullet wig (Power: 40)
Weapon: Kentucky-Fried meat sword (Power: 50)
Pants: Bugbear Bungguard (Power: 30)
Accessory: continuum transfunctioner

Skills:
(click the skill name for a description)

Patience of the Tortoise

Accomplishments:

You have completed your training with the Toot Oriole.
You have helped defend the Gourd
You have found Dr. Hobo Jones's treasure.
You have built your own Bitchin' Meat Car.

NEXT I AM MAKING PANTS OR MAYBE HAT.

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Tuesday, 15 June 2004 18:32 (twenty-one years ago)

tickonmydick (#93568)
Level 10
Ravioli Sorcerer

Statistics:
Current Hit Points: 87
Maximum Hit Points: 87
Current Mana Points: 126
Maximum Mana Points: 126

Muscle:
60 (base: 49)

(56/99)
Mysticality:
110 (base: 86)

(8/173)
Moxie:
53 (base: 51)

(70/103)
Adventures remaining: 54
Meat: 108341
Turns Played: 1198

Advancement:
You must gain 18 Mysticality to advance to level 11.

Equipment:
Hat: The Colander of Em-er'il (Power: 50)
Weapon: stolen accordion (Power: 10)
Pants: 1337 7r0uZ0RZ (Power: 90)
Accessory: Badass Belt
Accessory: kickback cookbook
Accessory: Jarlsberg's Earring

Effects:
Leash of Linguini (12)
Pasta Oneness (49)

Skills:
(click the skill name for a description)
Liver of Steel
Manicotti Meditation
eXtreme Ray of Something
Pastamastery
Cone of Whatever
Weapon of the Pastalord
Lasagna Bandages
Leash of Linguini
Spirit of Rigatoni
Cannelloni Cocoon

Current Familiar:
i make you sick bank, the 23 pound Leprechaun (340 kills)

Accomplishments:
You have completed your training with the Toot Oriole.
You have helped defend the Gourd.
You have slain your Nemesis in the Cave.
You have found the Dolphin King's treasure.
You have found Dr. Hobo Jones's treasure.
You have slain the Boss Bat.
You have discovered the Hidden Temple.
You have built your own Bitchin' Meat Car.
You have taken care of the rat problem at the Typical Tavern.
You have cleansed the taint for the Deep Fat Friars.
You have slain the King of Cobb's Knob.
You have found everything there is to find in the Strange Leaflet.
You have helped the Baron Rof L'm Fao.
You have undefiled the Cyrpt.

workin workin

― brock (brock), Wednesday, 16 June 2004 12:39 (twenty-one years ago)

I took some items, made a clockwork maid, and put it into the stash. If you take it and use it it will give you +4 turns a day! If you didn't know clockwork maid = frilly skirt + meat engine.

― marianna, Wednesday, 16 June 2004 14:32 (twenty-one years ago)

i love making food and drinks

― 0r4l R0b3rt5 (ex machina), Wednesday, 16 June 2004 14:38 (twenty-one years ago)

Woah thanks for the tip marianna! I want to make one.

I like to meatsmith. So far I have meatsmithed: dripping meat crossbow (in the clan crockpot) and sword (trying to get a bunch of $$$ for it yay flea market), kentucky fried meatsword, sticky meat pants, and bar skin pants. This game is fun and funny.

Today my Turtle Tamer whooped ass on a bunch of shit: boss bat, Typical Tavern, Slug Lord's map. I am still lowly little low leveler noob though.

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Wednesday, 16 June 2004 14:43 (twenty-one years ago)

Apparently I haven't found everything there is to find in the Strange Leaflet! Is there a way to cross the stream or something?

― Casuistry (Chris P), Wednesday, 16 June 2004 20:14 (twenty-one years ago)

Hmm, seems like there should be. Every other place you could get to had some purpose. (I haven't found it either, got the housebuilding kit thing only so far)

― JuliaA (j_bdules), Wednesday, 16 June 2004 20:29 (twenty-one years ago)

look behind things...

x-post: I been largely ignoring the social/money-making aspects of this game. the chat just annoys me to no end. Is this how people amass their wealth, or is there a huge meat fountain I've yet to come upon?

here's my vitals and non-vitals for the interested and intrigued:

fartfarmer (#95373)
Level 7
Concertina Con Artist

Statistics:
Current Hit Points: 69
Maximum Hit Points: 84 (base: 42)
Current Mojo Points: 2
Maximum Mojo Points: 58 (base: 33)
Muscle: 47 (base: 35)

(45/71)
Mysticality: 41 (base: 35)

(25/71)
Moxie: 57 (base: 41)

(38/83)
Inebriety: 22 (falling-down drunk)
Adventures remaining: 5
Meat: 29
Turns Played: 982

Advancement:
You must gain 12 Moxie to advance to level 8.

Equipment:
Hat: f3d0r4 (Power: 90)
Weapon: Kentucky-Fried meat crossbow (Power: 50)
Pants: 1337 7r0uZ0RZ (Power: 90)
Accessory: Xtreme nose ring
Accessory: shiny ring
Accessory: bejeweled accordion strap

Effects:
Hoojiwat's Hymn of Healthiness (34)
Cletus's Canticle of Celerity (22)

Skills:
(click the skill name for a description)
Liver of Steel
Moxie of the Mariachi
Hoojiwat's Hymn of Healthiness
Cletus's Canticle of Celerity
The Polka of Plenty
Brawnee's Anthem of Absorption

Current Familiar:
Pixie-Nympho, the 19 pound Baby Gravy Fairy (371 kills)

Accomplishments:
You have completed your training with the Toot Oriole.
You have helped defend the Gourd.
You have slain your Nemesis in the Cave.
You have found the Dolphin King's treasure.
You have found the Slug Lord's treasure.
You have found Dr. Hobo Jones's treasure.
You have slain the Boss Bat.
You have discovered the Hidden Temple.
You have built your own Bitchin' Meat Car.
You have planted a Beanstalk in the Nearby Plains.
You have taken care of the rat problem at the Typical Tavern.
You have cleansed the taint for the Deep Fat Friars.
You have found everything there is to find in the Strange Leaflet.

Account Created: June 04, 2004
Last Login: June 16, 2004

PvP:
Fights Won: 42
Fights Lost: 3

and then:

cankergirl (#100552)
Level 6
Malamute Basher

Statistics:
Current Hit Points: 7
Maximum Hit Points: 46 (base: 35)
Current Muscularity Points: 28
Maximum Muscularity Points: 28
Muscle: 54 (base: 34)

(38/69)
Mysticality: 36 (base: 30)

(51/61)
Moxie: 39 (base: 26)

(22/53)
Tipsiness: 21 (falling-down drunk)
Adventures remaining: 3
Meat: 1259
Turns Played: 662

Advancement:
You must gain 6 Muscle to advance to level 7.

Equipment:
Hat: Knob Goblin Visor (Power: 50)
Weapon: Bjorn's Hammer (Power: 50)
Pants: Ninja Hot Pants (Power: 70)
Accessory: gnoll-tooth necklace
Accessory: Xtreme nose ring
Accessory: shiny ring

Effects:
Hoojiwat's Hymn of Healthiness (30)
Seal Clubbing Frenzy (1143)

Skills:
(click the skill name for a description)
Liver of Steel
Seal Clubbing Frenzy
Lunging Thrust-Smack
Tongue of the Otter

Current Familiar:
cankerairy, the 9 pound Baby Gravy Fairy (86 kills)

Accomplishments:
You have completed your training with the Toot Oriole.
You have helped defend the Gourd.
You have slain your Nemesis in the Cave.
You have found the Dolphin King's treasure.
You have found the Slug Lord's treasure.
You have found Dr. Hobo Jones's treasure.
You have slain the Boss Bat.
You have discovered the Hidden Temple.
You have built your own Bitchin' Meat Car.
You have taken care of the rat problem at the Typical Tavern.
You have cleansed the taint for the Deep Fat Friars.
You have found everything there is to find in the Strange Leaflet.

Account Created: June 08, 2004
Last Login: June 16, 2004

PvP:
Fights Won: 42
Fights Lost: 8

My PvP fites have been almost exclusively with abandoned players. There sure are a lot of them.

― gizmo (gizmo), Thursday, 17 June 2004 00:53 (twenty-one years ago)

can you mention how pvp workz?

― 0r4l R0b3rt5 (ex machina), Thursday, 17 June 2004 01:02 (twenty-one years ago)

yes please explain PvP?

Also:

http://67.18.114.242/adventureimages/weretaco.gif You're fighting a Weretaco

This is a weretaco -- an ordinary man, who, when the moon is full, turns into a half-man, half-taco monstrosity.

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Thursday, 17 June 2004 14:30 (twenty-one years ago)

amazing!!

also, everyone go complete the monks in the woods quest IRON LIVER RULZ

― 0r4l R0b3rt5 (ex machina), Thursday, 17 June 2004 14:37 (twenty-one years ago)

ok, what does the goat familiar do?

― 0r4l R0b3rt5 (ex machina), Thursday, 17 June 2004 15:49 (twenty-one years ago)

It head butts people.

WHAT IS THE THING I AM MISSING IN THE STRANGE LEAFLET?

― Casuistry (Chris P), Thursday, 17 June 2004 16:53 (twenty-one years ago)

does it give me milk?

did you find the grue egg? did you type "xyzzy"?

― Be sure to Loop! Loop, Loop, Loop. (ex machina), Thursday, 17 June 2004 16:55 (twenty-one years ago)

Holy shit that one question that's not a question in the FAQ made me laugh a bugger onto my monitor screen.

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Thursday, 17 June 2004 17:12 (twenty-one years ago)

The FAQ about the reset that is.

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Thursday, 17 June 2004 17:13 (twenty-one years ago)

grue egg behind chest.

PvP: seems to me the best way to bump up stats (usually gain 2x the level you fight against in all three stat categories, if you choose to steal "dignity"). Fiting for $$$ or loot is a bit of a dud I've found, but can be useful if you need the cash or food/booze. You can fite 10 times per 24 hr period. Basically, you choose a person to fite against (best to search for weak players rather than those around you who are usually some of the strongest, more on that in a minute). You have between 4-7 mini-fites, whereby you will either try to do damage with your stat of choice, or they challenge you and you have to defend. For instance, it is best to fite when a bit drunk, cause sometimes you get challenged to a drunkness contest (easy victory if drunk). If you use your moxie, you basically make fun of the person. If you choose muscle, you try to hit them in places. They have a chance to defend and sometimes counter your action.

So, I usually look for players who:

have been abandoned. I feel bad whooping on other active
players and stealing their stats. There are other reasons for
doing this as well. There is less likelihood of retaliation. An
easy to find abandoned players is to look for characters with
low player numbers for your given level, as this is a sign
that they may be older characters that have been cast off. You
can look at when they last logged on to see how "abandoned" they
are.

have relatively weak "power" items equiped (especially
stat-boosting ones). If you have stat-boosters and they don't,
you are more likely to win handily.

have a poor win/loss ratio.

If you follow these rules, I've found you can actually fite some of the weaker characters a level above you and really gain stats fast. 10 fites = +2 boost in each stat if you win them.

Since others can always try to fite you, you can build up defenses in your campsite to weaken your opponent before you do battle. These include tent/cottage/house, fences, scarecrow, feng shui, bouquet. Also helps to leave your most powerful/stat building items on overnight.

― gizmo (gizmo), Thursday, 17 June 2004 18:12 (twenty-one years ago)

Oh yes, by choosing someone who has not logged in in the last day or two, and presuming you are even slightly drunk, you will always win the drunk challenge.

― gizmo (gizmo), Thursday, 17 June 2004 18:14 (twenty-one years ago)

Woah thanks a shit ton duder! Very thorough.

On an unrelated note...

OMG WTF "You are too full to eat that."????

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Thursday, 17 June 2004 18:15 (twenty-one years ago)

Yeah, you can only eat or drink so much in a day.

― Casuistry (Chris P), Thursday, 17 June 2004 19:00 (twenty-one years ago)

Did I miss out on the pickle factory? WTF?

― Casuistry (Chris P), Thursday, 17 June 2004 19:01 (twenty-one years ago)

yup. I guess. u had to have 150 in primary stat I think. saw some lame chat about it, that's all. lots of talk of brine.

― gizmo (gizmo), Thursday, 17 June 2004 19:23 (twenty-one years ago)

xxxpost Nick, have you stumbled across some bottomless supply of food? (And if so, WHERE?!?)

― Sean Thomas (sgthomas), Thursday, 17 June 2004 19:36 (twenty-one years ago)

Actually Sean, I just had some skewers and spices and kept making bat haggises and batwing/shroom kebabs and shit. And also a chorizo taco (I got all both ingredients for that from defeating the same weretaco) and a mushroom pizza (tomato, dough, knob shroom). I only just got my oven today! I love to cook food. I can't wait til a few levels from now when I can get reagents and shit AW NAW.

My favorite thing I got going today was my ghuol thingy familiar. That shit is mad helpful!

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Thursday, 17 June 2004 19:45 (twenty-one years ago)

make a chef in the box!!!

― Be sure to Loop! Loop, Loop, Loop. (ex machina), Thursday, 17 June 2004 19:55 (twenty-one years ago)

The grue familiar is soooo cute.

― Casuistry (Chris P), Thursday, 17 June 2004 20:05 (twenty-one years ago)

I totally want to! These are the things I want to make soon:

*chef in the box
*clockwork maid
*some eXtreme weapon
*turtlefactory

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Thursday, 17 June 2004 20:07 (twenty-one years ago)

I'm trying to figure out whatever is the dillio with the Detective Skull right now.

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Thursday, 17 June 2004 20:07 (twenty-one years ago)

Chef-in-the-box is awesome, I just made one today -- though finding the cooking materials seems like it's either feast or famine. Some days Fernswarthy's Tower is food central, other days nada; same with the Cobb's Knob Kitchens, where I didn't find so much as a tomato today...

― Sean Thomas (sgthomas), Thursday, 17 June 2004 20:11 (twenty-one years ago)

detective just tells how mnay hit points. kind of useful. I have.

I'll put some tomatoes in the stash soon.

― gizmo (gizmo), Thursday, 17 June 2004 20:24 (twenty-one years ago)

oh man, the ghoul whelp familiar is cool too. Major hit points restored.

― gizmo (gizmo), Thursday, 17 June 2004 23:04 (twenty-one years ago)

i've applied to clan ILXOR. i'm 'ollyoxenfree.'

― andrew l. r. (allocryptic), Friday, 18 June 2004 04:10 (twenty-one years ago)

OMG DUDES IT'S TEN LEAF CLOVER DAY AT HERMITAGE

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Friday, 18 June 2004 14:10 (twenty-one years ago)

OMG MY DUDES NOW HAVE 5-ALARM SAUCEPAN AND TURTLESLINGER AN ARMED ADVENTURER IS ME!

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Friday, 18 June 2004 14:10 (twenty-one years ago)

woah holy shit!:

Primo Meat Stash

http://67.18.114.242/adventureimages/chest.gif

You're feeling especially lucky, so you march directly into the Knob Goblin Treasury and grab a chest.
When you get back outside, you open it to see what spoils await you.

Your ten-leaf clover disappears in a puff of smoke.

http://67.18.114.242/itemimages/meatstack.gif You acquire an item: dense meat stack

Adventure again (Cobb's Knob Treasury)

Go back to Cobb's Knob

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Friday, 18 June 2004 14:15 (twenty-one years ago)

Can anyone solve the meat tank mystery? I don't know where to get it, and it's killing me.

― Dale the Titled (cprek), Friday, 18 June 2004 14:28 (twenty-one years ago)

empty meat tanks are found in Degrassi Knoll -- then combine the empty tank with a meat stack (=100 meats, click the link at the bottom of your inventory page if you don't already have some (assuming you've got 100 meat, that is))

― Sean Thomas (sgthomas), Friday, 18 June 2004 14:33 (twenty-one years ago)

ok cool. I've been venturing in the Knoll for a looonnng time and have gotten all the other parts 6 times over, but still haven't happened upon a meat tank.

― Dale the Titled (cprek), Friday, 18 June 2004 14:43 (twenty-one years ago)

Yeah, it's hit-or-miss -- sometimes there's a tank in the Gnollish Toolbox, other times not. I don't think I've ever found one on its own, though I could be wrong...

― Sean Thomas (sgthomas), Friday, 18 June 2004 14:44 (twenty-one years ago)

where can i get spooky fertilizer

― Jon Williams!!!!! (ROFFLE!@!@!@) (ex machina), Friday, 18 June 2004 14:45 (twenty-one years ago)

In them thur Spooky Woods.

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Friday, 18 June 2004 15:34 (twenty-one years ago)

fuck, i hate when the right item never shows up

― Jon Williams!!!!! (ROFFLE!@!@!@) (ex machina), Friday, 18 June 2004 15:35 (twenty-one years ago)

Is there none in the clan stash?

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Friday, 18 June 2004 15:36 (twenty-one years ago)

Or the mall.

― Casuistry (Chris P), Friday, 18 June 2004 15:37 (twenty-one years ago)

fuck the mall

― Jon Williams!!!!! (ROFFLE!@!@!@) (ex machina), Friday, 18 June 2004 15:38 (twenty-one years ago)

Actually let me see if I have a spare...

― Casuistry (Chris P), Friday, 18 June 2004 15:39 (twenty-one years ago)

You're in luck!

― Casuistry (Chris P), Friday, 18 June 2004 15:41 (twenty-one years ago)

I applied to clan as well… miko55 is me!

― Laura E (laurae55), Friday, 18 June 2004 15:49 (twenty-one years ago)

I have a Cocoabo bird familiar!

― Casuistry (Chris P), Saturday, 19 June 2004 06:04 (twenty-one years ago)

You shake up the Meat Globe and subject the miniature kingdom to a meatstorm. You feel vaguely god-like, until you accidentally drop the globe and shatter it. But at least you can collect the meat from inside.
You gain 100 Strongness.
You gain some Muscle points!

You gain 100 Wizardliness.
You gain a Mysticality point!

You gain 100 Smarm.
You gain a Moxie point!

You gain 1500 Meat.

― Jon Williams!!!!! (ROFFLE!@!@!@) (ex machina), Monday, 21 June 2004 15:21 (twenty-one years ago)

I got a meat globe too -- which seemingly appeared in my inventory from out of nowhere! Do you get this automatically after you get to level 7?

― Sean Thomas (sgthomas), Monday, 21 June 2004 15:38 (twenty-one years ago)

WTF WITH MEAT GLOBE!?!?

Also, is there anything I can do about being in a Drunken Stupor?

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Monday, 21 June 2004 16:29 (twenty-one years ago)

Sean, were you going to the shore a lot? it is a frequent travler item

nick, work out in the clan gym

― Jon Williams!!!!! (ROFFLE!@!@!@) (ex machina), Monday, 21 June 2004 16:31 (twenty-one years ago)

Nick, do your drinking at the end of the day, get plowed, then in the morning (or rather, after midnight Eastern time) you'll still have all those adventures but your drunkness should be gone.

― Casuistry (Chris P), Monday, 21 June 2004 17:15 (twenty-one years ago)

I'm Inno the Northland Wanderer, but I just used up all my turns. Level 2 so far. I have a Spooky Staff that I made, tho.

― stephen morris (stephen morris), Monday, 21 June 2004 17:21 (twenty-one years ago)

Aha, that's gotta be it, JW -- I took two trips in a row at the end of my session yesterday, and it showed up after that. Nice!

― Sean Thomas (sgthomas), Monday, 21 June 2004 17:23 (twenty-one years ago)

i just dumped a bunch of snacks in the clan stash.

2xChorizo Taco
3xHot Wings
3xPlain Pizza
2xShroomakabob

― Ian c=====8 (orion), Monday, 21 June 2004 19:17 (twenty-one years ago)

ian, try to get sausages from knob hill kitchen to make fucking sausage pizzazzzzz

― Jon Williams!!!!! (ROFFLE!@!@!@) (ex machina), Monday, 21 June 2004 19:18 (twenty-one years ago)

i have six sausage pizzas that i am saving for myself cuz they give mad stength bonuses!!!

― Ian c=====8 (orion), Monday, 21 June 2004 19:22 (twenty-one years ago)

Ooh that's a nice strategizing idea Chris! The thing is, I was all like "hm, let's check out the Typical Tavern" and like FUCK I became falling-down drunk, lost a bunch of meat, lost a bunch of strenthliness, DOH.

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Monday, 21 June 2004 19:23 (twenty-one years ago)

also, INSANELY SPICY BEAN BURRITOS ARE THE SHIT.

― Ian c=====8 (orion), Monday, 21 June 2004 19:24 (twenty-one years ago)

How do you get 'em insanely spicy? Just extra spice, or do I need a jabanero or s'um?

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Monday, 21 June 2004 19:28 (twenty-one years ago)

jabanero dude!

― Ian c=====8 (orion), Monday, 21 June 2004 19:36 (twenty-one years ago)

who can smith me a damn chrome turtle helmet? I wants one. I needs a Turtle-smither.

― gizmo (gizmo), Monday, 21 June 2004 21:07 (twenty-one years ago)

I'm Level 3 now. Can I get in on some nasty clan action?

― stephen morris (stephen morris), Tuesday, 22 June 2004 13:46 (twenty-one years ago)

I am obsessed with this game, I have three characters, one of which is called, suprise suprise Menelaus - level 11 or 12 or something. The other two are Vaughn and Grogan. It fills in time nicely while I look for a job. Still not part of a clan, I was thinking of starting one up called Clan of the Cave Bear but then I realised I might have to be nice to lots of people so I wimped out. Isolationism has its rewards.

― Menelaus Darcy (Menelaus Darcy), Tuesday, 22 June 2004 13:55 (twenty-one years ago)

I'm a seal clubber w/ 24202 meat. What accessories should I buy?

― Jon Williams!!!!! (ROFFLE!@!@!@) (ex machina), Tuesday, 22 June 2004 14:44 (twenty-one years ago)

LOW-LEVEL SPOILER ALERT

The "xyzzy" cheat for the Strange Leaflet has been disabled. However, typing "plugh" into the dialog box = teh awesome surprise.

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Tuesday, 22 June 2004 14:46 (twenty-one years ago)

which alcoholic drinks raise which stats?

bloody beer gives you MP

― Shake Your Halo Down! (ex machina), Wednesday, 23 June 2004 12:38 (twenty-one years ago)

salty dog = mysticality

― Shake Your Halo Down! (ex machina), Wednesday, 23 June 2004 12:38 (twenty-one years ago)

I think bloody marys do too.

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Wednesday, 23 June 2004 12:50 (twenty-one years ago)

White Canadians = strengf I think.

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Wednesday, 23 June 2004 12:50 (twenty-one years ago)

Hat: star hat (Power: 150) [unequip]
Weapon: chrome sword (Power: 120) [unequip]
Pants: penguin shorts (Power: 80) [unequip

:DDDDD

― Shake Your Halo Down! (ex machina), Wednesday, 23 June 2004 13:00 (twenty-one years ago)

anyone beat the bone dragon yet?

― Shake Your Halo Down! (ex machina), Wednesday, 23 June 2004 13:00 (twenty-one years ago)

i love slapntickles!

McFeely (#90822)
Level 8
Oreganoccultist
Statistics:

Current Hit Points: 119
Maximum Hit Points: 120 (base: 62)

Current Mana Points: 14
Maximum Mana Points: 128 (base: 88)

Muscle: 32 (base: 25)
(2/51)

Mysticality: 65 (base: 61)
(82/123)

Moxie: 41 (base: 40)
(54/81)

Tipsiness: 13 (pretty drunk)
Adventures remaining: 79
Meat: 2266

Turns Played: 1509

Advancement:

You must gain 7 Mysticality to advance to level 9.

Equipment:

Hat: mesh cap (Power: 100)
Weapon: linoleum staff (Power: 80)
Pants: hippopotamus pants (Power: 100)
Accessory: Special Sauce Glove
Accessory: ladle of mystery
Accessory: shiny ring

Effects:

Saucemastery (2581)

Elemental Saucesphere (339)

Jalapeño Saucesphere (560)

― Shake Your Halo Down! (ex machina), Wednesday, 23 June 2004 13:07 (twenty-one years ago)

Yes, that was what I was trying to beat when I was whining earlier about not getting enough strengthliness points. Now I'm trying to power up so I'm not such a wuss against the giants. I'm spending lots of time on the Penultimate Fantasy Airship.

― Casuistry (Chris P), Wednesday, 23 June 2004 14:30 (twenty-one years ago)

Casuistry what level are you?

― Shake Your Halo Down! (ex machina), Wednesday, 23 June 2004 14:31 (twenty-one years ago)

11. I'm a Sub-Apprentice Accordion Thief.

― Casuistry (Chris P), Wednesday, 23 June 2004 14:35 (twenty-one years ago)

yea, the dragon isn't that bad... one of my characters was accidentally wearing an asshat (power:50) instead of a star hat (power:150) when fighting him

oops

― Shake Your Halo Down! (ex machina), Wednesday, 23 June 2004 14:36 (twenty-one years ago)

OMG when you eat White Castle Burgers in this game they should give you like a bonus stench damage or some shit.

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Wednesday, 23 June 2004 18:23 (twenty-one years ago)

what should I imbibe to help me pump up before a HUGE battle? also, what accesories can i get to raise my hp?

― People love Gravity and Ebullition! (ex machina), Thursday, 24 June 2004 13:32 (twenty-one years ago)

Some thoughts: red pixel potions restore full HP (2 red pix, 3 black pix). clearly wearing certain gear bumps up stats, which dictate how you hit (str) and evade being hit (mox). casting big attack/defense spells can be helpful, although my Brawny-Lad absorbing spell never seems to do anything for me. hymn of healtiness boosts HP by 10-20% (message fartfarmer if you want it). accordian strap bumps HP/MP (for theives only though). take a strong attacking pet with you. probably a few other ways to boost temporarily.

What are you attacking anyway?

― gizmo (gizmo), Thursday, 24 June 2004 13:42 (twenty-one years ago)

oh, it was way easier this time with hippo shorts on instead of penguin shorts (+25 HP, more power)

just the fucking bonerdragon

― People love Gravity and Ebullition! (ex machina), Thursday, 24 June 2004 13:49 (twenty-one years ago)

AW YEEYUH MY BALLOON MONKEY BOUT TO BE UP TO 10 SOON I BE LECTROCUTIN SOME MUFUHZ

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Thursday, 24 June 2004 14:00 (twenty-one years ago)

fuck yea

i like my blood faced volleyball

― People love Gravity and Ebullition! (ex machina), Thursday, 24 June 2004 14:02 (twenty-one years ago)

ha ha all my favorite familiars now are the ones that HURT PEOPLE

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Thursday, 24 June 2004 14:03 (twenty-one years ago)

how much damage are those doing for you, generally?

― People love Gravity and Ebullition! (ex machina), Thursday, 24 June 2004 14:05 (twenty-one years ago)

I'm level 3 still, but I got a Leprachaun today. Named him Iggy Pop.

I can't seem to combine my empty orcish meat locker and meat stack to get a full meat locker. How should I go about getting a full meat locker? I want a maid.

― stephen morris (stephen morris), Thursday, 24 June 2004 14:13 (twenty-one years ago)

you don't need a full meatlocker

― People love Gravity and Ebullition! (ex machina), Thursday, 24 June 2004 14:13 (twenty-one years ago)

xpost. Jon, how you get the hippo/penguin skins? if you can't whoop up on the bone dragon, how the hell are you wasting yeti ass? I can't even lay a hit on the yeti's yet.

― gizmo (gizmo), Thursday, 24 June 2004 14:16 (twenty-one years ago)

there's this little thing called the mall...

I haven't been doing much on the mountain.... yet!

and the bone dragon died easy as pie

― People love Gravity and Ebullition! (ex machina), Thursday, 24 June 2004 14:16 (twenty-one years ago)

How do I make a meat engine without a full meat locker? Help me, Rhonda.

― stephen morris (stephen morris), Thursday, 24 June 2004 14:18 (twenty-one years ago)

you need a meat TANK not a locker

― People love Gravity and Ebullition! (ex machina), Thursday, 24 June 2004 14:19 (twenty-one years ago)

fucking hell. where do I get one of those?

― stephen morris (stephen morris), Thursday, 24 June 2004 14:20 (twenty-one years ago)

are you in the clan? there's surely some in the stash! or degrassi knoll i think

― People love Gravity and Ebullition! (ex machina), Thursday, 24 June 2004 14:21 (twenty-one years ago)

http://www.fais.or.jp/kokoro/heart(2)11.gif

― stephen morris (stephen morris), Thursday, 24 June 2004 14:29 (twenty-one years ago)

xpost - Ok jon, that is what I thought. but i was just wondering if there was some secret something.

xpost - If you use the empty orc meat locker, it installs at your campsite and you can protect your money from PvP fites. Havent used mine yet. no one has wanted to fite me yet, so i haven't worried about my meat.

The palindome is sweet. booze/food/stats=yum.

― gizmo (gizmo), Thursday, 24 June 2004 14:41 (twenty-one years ago)

oh nice!!!

― People love Gravity and Ebullition! (ex machina), Thursday, 24 June 2004 14:46 (twenty-one years ago)

wow, there are two clansmen (inc. me) in clan chat now. it's a party!

― gizmo (gizmo), Thursday, 24 June 2004 14:47 (twenty-one years ago)

how much damage are those doing for you, generally?

Only in the single-digits yet with the ones I've used (misquito, balloon monkey) but I'm waiting for the PLANETS TO ALIGN or whatever to see how the grue does.

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Thursday, 24 June 2004 14:57 (twenty-one years ago)

ok, so the chat thing is a bust. bah.

― gizmo (gizmo), Thursday, 24 June 2004 15:05 (twenty-one years ago)

by the way, grue hits when near "new" moons

― gizmo (gizmo), Thursday, 24 June 2004 15:06 (twenty-one years ago)

http://www.agesoftime.com/kol/ - item locater
http://s93834343.onlinehome.us/KoL.txt - spoilers

― People love Gravity and Ebullition! (ex machina), Thursday, 24 June 2004 15:10 (twenty-one years ago)

first link has transferred ownership and moved to http://kol.quantumtunnel.net/

― gizmo (gizmo), Thursday, 24 June 2004 15:12 (twenty-one years ago)

I love my cocoabo.

I was really loving the mosquito for a while, since it stole HP from monsters and gave it to me.

I finally beat my first MagiMechTech whatever and now I'm trying to get tuff enuff to kick giant ass. It's taking a while.

― Casuistry (Chris P), Thursday, 24 June 2004 23:33 (twenty-one years ago)

I assume of the goth variety? I'm so not there yet. I still can't even hit the yeti. sigh. Need to break 100 for more adventuring madness. is buying a store worth it?

― gizmo (gizmo), Friday, 25 June 2004 00:27 (twenty-one years ago)

Does anyone have a frilly skirt? They're not at the damn market anymore.

― stephen morris (stephen morris), Friday, 25 June 2004 03:45 (twenty-one years ago)

I've gotten like two frilly skirts from the orcish frat house.

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Friday, 25 June 2004 12:48 (twenty-one years ago)

I have mariachi pants!!

Shouldn't this be its own thread title?

― Skottie, Friday, 25 June 2004 13:35 (twenty-one years ago)

"You enter the Orcish Frat House, and sneak upstairs to one of the bedrooms.

You find the chest which contains their alcohol fund, and help yourself to a healthy chunk of it. I guess they'll be slightly less drunk at their next party. They probably won't be any less lame, though."

This game constantly keeps me in stitches. All the creatures in the Valley of Baron Rof L'm Fao have got me losing my shit. LamZ0r N00B!

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Friday, 25 June 2004 17:58 (twenty-one years ago)

The giants -- not to spoil anything -- but they are of many different varieties, apparently including goth, but I keep getting my ass whupped so I guess it's back to the gym to beef up my muscliness!

― Casuistry (Chris P), Friday, 25 June 2004 18:09 (twenty-one years ago)

I'm still at this awkward stage where I'm strong enough that the KoL gods feel I apparently should have access to many wondrous places, yet I'm still weak enough to get my ass handed to me on a wad of dough by denisons of almost all of 'em.

I'm also obsessed with gathering familiars and naming 'em silly shit. My leprechaun = Leper Khan.

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Friday, 25 June 2004 18:16 (twenty-one years ago)

denisons?

― Michael White (Hereward), Friday, 25 June 2004 18:17 (twenty-one years ago)

MY 1337 SPLELNIG o\/\/N5 J00!

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Friday, 25 June 2004 18:18 (twenty-one years ago)

nick, if it is any gauge stat- and equipment-wise for you, both my characters are now able to hold their own more or less everywhere except the Icy Peak now. The extreme cold uniform just doesn't suit me yet I guess. Need more intrinsic stats still.

by the way, apparently Icy peak is where the phat meat at, yo.

― gizmo (gizmo), Friday, 25 June 2004 18:41 (twenty-one years ago)

I can't level worth shit. Still on lowly 6. My favorite familiar right now is DJ Bill-E the Angry Goat.

― Dale the Titled (cprek), Friday, 25 June 2004 18:51 (twenty-one years ago)

There is meat to be found on the icy peak, yes. More meat on the levels beyond it, but there seems to be something clever you can do with the yeti skins that I didn't quite figure out.

― Casuistry (Chris P), Friday, 25 June 2004 19:17 (twenty-one years ago)

woo. i just whooped up on a few yeti. taxing to the HP, but now my day feels complete.

― gizmo (gizmo), Saturday, 26 June 2004 00:16 (twenty-one years ago)

http://67.18.114.242/itemimages/rocks.gif

You drink the gin and juice. This puts your mind on your meat, and your meat on your mind.
http://67.18.114.242/itemimages/hourglass.gif You gain 6 Adventures.

You gain 5 Enchantedness.

You gain 3 Drunkenness.

― Ian c=====8 (orion), Sunday, 27 June 2004 01:17 (twenty-one years ago)

Oh this is the best thing since ever (but it's totally ruining my workdays). I have applied to the ILXOR clan, can I join?

― Hanna (Hanna), Monday, 28 June 2004 09:34 (twenty-one years ago)

(I am DJ Kitten.)

― Hanna (Hanna), Monday, 28 June 2004 09:35 (twenty-one years ago)

I'm quitting guys :(

― People love Gravity and Ebullition! (ex machina), Monday, 28 June 2004 11:37 (twenty-one years ago)

Ok, my character "McFeely" level 9 has shed all his gear and smashed his hippie stone. PvP him to steal his stats.

McFeely (#90822)
Level 9
Basillusionist
Statistics:

Current Hit Points: 57
Maximum Hit Points: 94 (base: 83)

Current Mana Points: 93
Maximum Mana Points: 120

Muscle: 38
(38/77)

Mysticality: 83 (base: 82)
(21/165)

Moxie: 53
(67/107)

Adventures remaining: 0
Meat: 0

― People love Gravity and Ebullition! (ex machina), Monday, 28 June 2004 11:48 (twenty-one years ago)

i dumped tons of good gear and items too

― People love Gravity and Ebullition! (ex machina), Monday, 28 June 2004 11:53 (twenty-one years ago)

Why are you quitting Jon?

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Monday, 28 June 2004 12:31 (twenty-one years ago)

I don't like having two characters and I wanna try from the start with a different class.

― Player Piano Gamelan (ex machina), Monday, 28 June 2004 12:34 (twenty-one years ago)

Oh totally. I kinda wish I had started as a Pastamancer, cuz there's lots of shit I want to cook that I can't. :(

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Monday, 28 June 2004 12:37 (twenty-one years ago)

Today is a good day for grue familiars. They be fuckin shit UP!

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Monday, 28 June 2004 16:32 (twenty-one years ago)

there's some really awesome gear in the clan stash dudes

don't forget some of it is worth selling for cashmoney

― Player Piano Gamelan (ex machina), Monday, 28 June 2004 16:37 (twenty-one years ago)

x - You typically need both sets of class characters to make many of the difficult things. i.e, Sauceror for sauce + Pastamancer for pasta.

x - jon, i thought you were playing like all six characters already?

it is sort of sad to see a character abandoned. but then again, this shit _is_ taking up way too much time. duty calls and all that.

― gizmo (gizmo), Monday, 28 June 2004 21:52 (twenty-one years ago)

You could have waited until the reset!

― Casuistry (Chris P), Monday, 28 June 2004 22:29 (twenty-one years ago)

I just started today. This game RULEZ!

THIS IS ME:
Spoonybarger (#128187)
Level 2
Rhythm Rogue

― AaronHz (AaronHz), Tuesday, 29 June 2004 07:31 (twenty-one years ago)

my other character "roffle" is ripe for PvP

― Player Piano Gamelan (ex machina), Tuesday, 29 June 2004 11:34 (twenty-one years ago)

oh, phooey:
June 29
I've changed it so you can no longer PvP somebody who isn't EXACTLY the same level as you. It will be like this until I either a) get some sort of retaliation system in place, or b) decide not to do a).

oh, well. I'm gonna try to get to level 3 when I have more turns tonight so I can join the ILXOR guild.

― AaronHz (AaronHz), Tuesday, 29 June 2004 19:29 (twenty-one years ago)

Alright, did some time in the sleazy alley and I'm at lvl3. I applied to clan ILXOR, and sent alan banana a message so he knows who I am.

― AaronHz (AaronHz), Wednesday, 30 June 2004 05:12 (twenty-one years ago)

sterlclover

sterlclover (#129553)
Level 2
Cilantro Seer

Statistics:
Current Hit Points:
0
Maximum Hit
Points:
7
Current Mana Points:
6
Maximum Mana
Points:
6
Muscle:
3 (base: 5)

(8/11)

Mysticality:
3 (base: 6)

(7/13)

Moxie:
2 (base: 4)

(1/9)

Adventures
remaining:
0
Meat:
104
Turns Played:
85

Advancement:
You must gain 2 Mysticality to advance to level 3.

Equipment:
Hat:

Oriole-feather headdress (Power: 15)
Weapon:

Knob Goblin tongs (Power: 20)
Pants:

Knob Goblin pants (Power: 25)

Effects:

Beaten Up (3)

Skills:
(click the skill name for a description)
Sauce Contemplation

Accomplishments:
You have completed your training with the Toot Oriole.

― Sterling Clover (s_clover), Wednesday, 30 June 2004 06:06 (twenty-one years ago)

Excuse me for being an idiot (possibly)... but I can't find any rims to complete my car. I have been adventuring in Degrassi Knoll for a zillion turns and have got more sprockets and springs than I know what to do with - but no rims. Should I keep looking there? Or can I buy one somewhere?

― Mog, Wednesday, 30 June 2004 10:42 (twenty-one years ago)

Mog: the hermit has them

― ¥¤±²£¢Ð¼æ®ª«¶Þ÷³¹ß½Ø×©§¾¿¥¤±²£¢Ð¼æ®ª«¶Þ÷³¹ß½Ø×©§¾¿¥¤±²£¢Ð¼æ®ª«¶Þ÷³¹ß½Ø×©§¾¿ (ex , Wednesday, 30 June 2004 11:27 (twenty-one years ago)

Thanks - I now have a bitchin' meat car!

― Mog, Wednesday, 30 June 2004 11:58 (twenty-one years ago)

where alan banana at? I need my clan hookup, yo.

― AaronHz (AaronHz), Thursday, 1 July 2004 04:18 (twenty-one years ago)

same heah.

― Sterling Clover (s_clover), Thursday, 1 July 2004 04:41 (twenty-one years ago)

I know he was logged on today. He's shinin' us yo.

― AaronHz (AaronHz), Thursday, 1 July 2004 04:47 (twenty-one years ago)

RAD! I was just accepted.

― AaronHz (AaronHz), Thursday, 1 July 2004 05:12 (twenty-one years ago)

two weeks pass...

i want more sfuff to do. i just go in for the stat-boosting each day. bah.

― gizmo (gizmo), Friday, 16 July 2004 19:05 (twenty-one years ago)

There seems to be a lag between getting the Knob Goblin King's crown and doing that whole Naughty Sorceress challenge. Or there was for me. I got a black candle from the clan stash (thanks, whoever put one there), but something I read said something about Goth Giants in the Giant Castle dropping the candles. Uh, what giant castle?

I feel like I have a lot less to do now too. I just keep adventuring so that I can get ingredients for cocktails (and maybe boost stats). My character drinks a lot of whisky sours.

― JuliaA (j_bdules), Friday, 16 July 2004 20:24 (twenty-one years ago)

yeah, you have to several things in between, j.

You have completed your training with the Toot Oriole.
You have helped defend the Gourd.
You have slain your Nemesis in the Cave.
You have found the Dolphin King's treasure.
You have found the Slug Lord's treasure.
You have found Dr. Hobo Jones's treasure.
You have slain the Boss Bat.
You have discovered the Hidden Temple.
You have built your own Bitchin' Meat Car.
You have planted a Beanstalk in the Nearby Plains.
You have taken care of the rat problem at the Typical Tavern.
You have cleansed the taint for the Deep Fat Friars.
You have slain the King of Cobb's Knob.
You have found everything there is to find in the Strange Leaflet.
You have summoned the UB3r 31337 HaX0R.
You have helped the Baron Rof L'm Fao.
You have undefiled the Cyrpt.

I've completed the sorceress thing to the point where it says "to be continued..." Perhaps the pickle factory will make another appearance so brock and I have something to do besides beat up yeti for fun?

― gizmo (gizmo), Friday, 16 July 2004 20:53 (twenty-one years ago)

Julia, have you gone up the beanstalk yet?

― Casuistry (Chris P), Friday, 16 July 2004 21:35 (twenty-one years ago)

I'm not at a high enough level, though I've planted the beanstalk. I've done all the things gizmo listed except for the UB3r 31337 HaX0R one. I should see what's up with that.

I'm trying to get one more key for the perplexing door in the sorceress castle thing now, in addition to my questing for booze.

― JuliaA (j_bdules), Friday, 16 July 2004 22:05 (twenty-one years ago)

You haven't gone past the Orc Chasm yet?

― Casuistry (Chris P), Friday, 16 July 2004 22:25 (twenty-one years ago)

The Lair is the last quest. You have a bunch to do before you should worry about that door.

― Casuistry (Chris P), Friday, 16 July 2004 22:32 (twenty-one years ago)

the hacker one is fun, cause you get a nice stat boost. I wouldn't be too quick to finish, or you'll be outta work like me. you still need to do lots up the beanstalk before you can complete the lair thing though.

― gizmo (gizmo), Friday, 16 July 2004 22:50 (twenty-one years ago)

Going past the Orc Chasm? I did help the Baron L'mfao and got the Drywall Axe in exchange for the dictionary. I consult http://s93834343.onlinehome.us/KoL.txt a little bit to try to understand what I'm doing, and it seems that I've done every quest listed but the sorceress one. And the beanstalk, obv.

(xp, I get distracted and never finish my posts....)Hm, it sounds like I'm all out of order then...I should work on muscle so I can take on the beanstalk.

― JuliaA (j_bdules), Friday, 16 July 2004 22:57 (twenty-one years ago)

yep, not only do you have to get up the beanstalk, but you have to give them a proper ass-whooping up there too. i reckon you need at least 130-140 in your prime stat to do this properly, although you can probably supplement this substantially by buying items cheaply in the mall or from clan stash.

― gizmo (gizmo), Friday, 16 July 2004 23:34 (twenty-one years ago)

for the hacker one you need a 30699 scroll or whatever and then add it to a 668 scroll and use it. its just a side-bonus type thing.

i've completed nearly everything with one character too except for the castle etc. (and the beanstalk).

― Sterling Clover (s_clover), Saturday, 17 July 2004 08:07 (twenty-one years ago)

Yeah, I've also done everything (I think) up to the Castle in the sky, and I must gain MUCH stats before I can do that, so I'm also just hanging around, cooking some food, buying spider webs to make Gourd potion... Sucks a bit, there should be a couple more quests before the Castle and Sorceress.

― Hanna (Hanna), Saturday, 17 July 2004 08:41 (twenty-one years ago)

Most days, I just work out.

― Casuistry (Chris P), Saturday, 17 July 2004 14:32 (twenty-one years ago)

Im working up to taking control of the KoL ecomony. I still have a looooong loooong road ahead of me.

― gizmo (gizmo), Saturday, 17 July 2004 14:39 (twenty-one years ago)

gourd potion is reduced in power now i think, when you use it often enough!

i'm working on purchasing power at the mall too - got some chrome gear, going for some more.

― Sterling Clover (s_clover), Sunday, 18 July 2004 01:44 (twenty-one years ago)

This Zork adventurye is irking me something serious. I WANT TO LIGHT A DAMN FIRE AND WHACK THE BUSH! (ps: Plugh)

― David R. (popshots75`), Sunday, 18 July 2004 13:31 (twenty-one years ago)

I am totally fucking stuck on the Stone Mariachis. I have "Squeezings of Woe", but what the shit with the other two of 'em?

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Monday, 26 July 2004 17:57 (twenty-one years ago)

I have the Heavy Metal Sonata too. I thought I would need that. It doesn't seem to be doing anything.

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Monday, 26 July 2004 17:58 (twenty-one years ago)

From: Stephen (#146481) [reply] [quoted] - 7926771
Date: Thursday, July 29, 07:29AM
Stephen tried to burninate you, but you managed to win the fight.

From: Stephen (#146481) [reply] [quoted] - 7926816
Date: Thursday, July 29, 07:30AM
Stephen tried to burninate you, but you managed to win the fight.

From: Stephen (#146481) [reply] [quoted] - 8057430
Date: Saturday, July 31, 10:52AM
Stephen tried to burninate you, but you managed to win the fight.

From: Stephen (#146481) [reply] [quoted] - 8112631
Date: Sunday, August 01, 10:42AM
STOP ATTACKING ME YOU DICK. PICK ON SOMEONE ELSE 4 A CHANGE

― :|, Sunday, 1 August 2004 17:02 (twenty-one years ago)

Nick, you need more keys, you'll get nearly everything you need from the mysterious door or whatevs.

― Casuistry (Chris P), Sunday, 1 August 2004 18:20 (twenty-one years ago)

spoiler

keys -- digital, star, skeleton (also use the balloon mon-key for a bonus!)

/spoiler

― Sterling Clover (s_clover), Monday, 2 August 2004 03:33 (twenty-one years ago)

I've just applied to join Clan ILXOR. Please let me in! (I am called Bunface)

― C J (C J), Monday, 2 August 2004 04:59 (twenty-one years ago)

My ass is being continually handed to me by the Knob Goblin King. Do I just have to keep chipping away at his stats day after day? Or shall I come back when I've got a better weapon?

― Mog, Monday, 2 August 2004 09:51 (twenty-one years ago)

mog, you can't defeat him looking like that, your going to need a disguise....a sexy disguise!

― zappi (joni), Monday, 2 August 2004 10:14 (twenty-one years ago)

If anyone wants a fairy gravy familiar I just left a pregnant mushroom in the stash, stick it in a terrarium and away you go

― Andrew Blood Thames (Andrew Thames), Monday, 2 August 2004 10:45 (twenty-one years ago)

Zappi, I have the outfit you speak of, and the perfume too. But soon as I get into the King's Chamber I get whacked for like 35 HPs and even my Lunging Thrust-Smack ain't enough to stop me getting killed by his second hit. What I need to know is if he loses stat points each time I go in, or if I'm wasting my time going back in there time after time...

― Mog, Monday, 2 August 2004 11:22 (twenty-one years ago)

as far as i know he doesn't lose stat points everytime you go in...i'd get a bigger weapon or even better more HP.

― zappi (joni), Monday, 2 August 2004 11:27 (twenty-one years ago)

more moxie, better armor. also buy a voleyball from the hermit and a terarium from the market if you havent already.

― :|, Monday, 2 August 2004 11:35 (twenty-one years ago)

Oh, thanks guys, I figured it out already.

That one thing on the Penultimate Fantasy Airship, the series of annoying encounters or whatever, made me lose my shit the first time I saw it.

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Monday, 2 August 2004 12:36 (twenty-one years ago)

Does anybody know what's the deal with the icy peak? I mean, I've gotten through the OH NO NO YETIS bits and gotten the Yeti Protest Sign and even bothered to use it. I get the feeling its the KoL 12-Ft. Lizards getting tired of people taking advantage of the peak and trying to discourage everyone from yetislaying up there.

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Monday, 2 August 2004 19:08 (twenty-one years ago)

I can't even get up the damn peak! Stupid goats or ninja snowmen need cough up some outfit gear ASAP!

― David R. (popshots75`), Monday, 2 August 2004 19:21 (twenty-one years ago)

Hey Raposa! Are you the one causing the ilxor.com problems today? ;-)

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Monday, 2 August 2004 19:23 (twenty-one years ago)

Hey Raggett! That depends on the problems, bucko! I only take credit for the cool shit.

― David R. (popshots75`), Monday, 2 August 2004 20:01 (twenty-one years ago)

Yeah right. Now fix the ilxor.com address so it redirects to p3r.net. ;-)

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Monday, 2 August 2004 20:16 (twenty-one years ago)

daver you get gear from the extreme dudes only! and 'licous, yeah its pretty much they figured the ca$h from the peak was unbalancing the "economy" so wanted to tone things down in terms of payoff a bit. what's coming next i dunno?

as for the goblin king i found having an accessory like flaming knuckles which increased my changes of getting the first hit helped a whole bunch, and then you can always throw some wussiness potions or something on him or use some torpedoes or something?

― Sterling Clover (s_clover), Tuesday, 3 August 2004 07:33 (twenty-one years ago)

word. i'm amenbreakfast please allow me to join tha clan

― Barnaby (Barnaby), Thursday, 5 August 2004 10:36 (twenty-one years ago)

Argh the server is so SLOOOOOWW.

― Dan I. (Dan I.), Friday, 6 August 2004 04:05 (twenty-one years ago)

Aaargh I can't work out how to make a car!

― Andrew Blood Thames (Andrew Thames), Friday, 6 August 2004 07:02 (twenty-one years ago)

Bitchin' Meat Car
You must first gather a cog, an Empty Meat Tank, some Tires, a spring and a sprocket. Some of these are found inside Gnollish Toolboxes, which are found in Degrassi Knoll. You need the Sweet Rims, which you get from the Hermit by trading him a Worthless item. You will also need five Meat Pastes and a Meat Stack (must have 100 meat to make this), which can be made inside your inventory. Combine the Meat Stack with the Empty Meat Tank to get a Full Meat Tank, and combine the Tires with the Sweet Rims to get the Dope Wheels. Combine a spring and a sprocket, then combine the result with a cog to make Cog And Sprocket Assembly. Now combine the Full Meat Tank with the Cog And Sprocket Assembly to produce a Meat Engine, which you can then combine with the Dope Wheels to get a Bitchin' Meatcar. Return to the Council to complete the quest and to gain the ability to adventure at the Shore.

― AaronHz (AaronHz), Friday, 6 August 2004 07:07 (twenty-one years ago)

Thanks a lot, done!

― Andrew Blood Thames (Andrew Thames), Friday, 6 August 2004 07:11 (twenty-one years ago)

all that stuff is right here if you get stuck again(posted upthread but whatever I'll repost it):
http://s93834343.onlinehome.us/KoL.txt

― AaronHz (AaronHz), Friday, 6 August 2004 07:13 (twenty-one years ago)

Also if you are in the ILX clan the items in the clan stash are an immeasurable help to low-level characters. Thanks to that I've got a bunch of stuff at my campsite and the only thing I need for a car are sweet rims.

― Dan I. (Dan I.), Friday, 6 August 2004 07:26 (twenty-one years ago)

Not to mention weapons/hats/pants/etc.

― Dan I. (Dan I.), Friday, 6 August 2004 07:26 (twenty-one years ago)

c'mon let Menelaus, Grogan and Vaughn join the ILXOR clan... my three characters will be applying soon, watch out for me

― Menelaus Darcy (Menelaus Darcy), Tuesday, 10 August 2004 15:13 (twenty-one years ago)

I need a beer lens, dammit! (I'm sugarplum)

― luna (luna.c), Tuesday, 10 August 2004 17:22 (twenty-one years ago)

Question: how powerful should my Level 10 disco bandit be in order to adventure in the airship w/out getting my ass handed to me by every stinkin' character on deck? Sidebar: the chocobird familiar is SWEEET!

― David R. (popshots75`), Tuesday, 10 August 2004 17:51 (twenty-one years ago)

Airship got easier when my muscle got up to 120 or so maybe? I remember someone saying that the whole beanstalk could be dealt with pretty easily once you're above 150. When I was getting my ass kicked there, I'd just get my ghoul whelp and go adventure elsewhere until my HPs were better. Or use a pixel potion/tiny house/scroll of drastic healing/phonics down.

I'm liking my bloody volleyball familiar lately. I got an extra volleyball by accident so if anyone needs one, it's in the clan stash.

― JuliaA (j_bdules), Tuesday, 10 August 2004 18:21 (twenty-one years ago)

My kingdom for some fucking swashbuckling pants - I hate these bloody pirates.

― luna (luna.c), Thursday, 12 August 2004 05:25 (twenty-one years ago)

I can't get past the hippies on the island. It keeps telling me I'm suffering stench damage - what should I equip to protect myself? I made an asshat, but that doesn't seem to be powerful enough.

― C J (C J), Thursday, 12 August 2004 05:51 (twenty-one years ago)

I think the pine freshener worked for me

― luna (luna.c), Thursday, 12 August 2004 05:52 (twenty-one years ago)

Yay I finally have high enough stats for that Chrome Crossbow, w00t!

― Dan I. (Dan I.), Thursday, 12 August 2004 07:42 (twenty-one years ago)

Anyone know where the best place to go is after one is tough enough to consistently kick ninja snowman ass? I'm still a little afraid of the mountain's peak though; is that really the next closest step up?

― Dan I. (Dan I.), Thursday, 12 August 2004 07:44 (twenty-one years ago)

Oh my aching grammar.

― Dan I. (Dan I.), Thursday, 12 August 2004 07:45 (twenty-one years ago)

four months pass...

the new pvp system is absolutely nervewracking.

― :| (....), Tuesday, 28 December 2004 09:07 (twenty-one years ago)

one month passes...

Fargh!!!!!!!!

I just joined a clan, but I didn't know there was an ilx clan. Can we unjoin one and join another?

― Hurting (Hurting), Tuesday, 8 February 2005 15:31 (twenty years ago)

click on "membership roster" in the clann hall, scroll to the bottom, check the "confirm" box, click "leave clan".

― bass braille (....), Tuesday, 8 February 2005 16:25 (twenty years ago)

Ok, well my characters are Old Salt and Young Salt. I may only have one of them join (if either), and keep the other one in its present clan.

― Hurting (Hurting), Tuesday, 8 February 2005 16:54 (twenty years ago)

one month passes...

should i shell out $50 for a custom avatar, or would this be the pinnacle of geekdom?

― bass braille (....), Sunday, 13 March 2005 20:44 (twenty years ago)

two months pass...

this game is fun. do ppl still play? can someone let me join the ilxor clan pleeez?

― Sym Sym (sym), Wednesday, 1 June 2005 05:22 (twenty years ago)

I log in every few weeks to see what they've updated. I don't know if I can add you to the clan, though.

― Casuistry (Chris P), Wednesday, 1 June 2005 10:01 (twenty years ago)

i still log in here and there to see what messages people leave me when they p2p against me. i find it amusing.

i have lost track of what they've updated and i guess i've mostly lost interest in the actual game though. too bad, it was really addictive and fun for a while.

― JuliaA (j_bdules), Wednesday, 1 June 2005 11:51 (twenty years ago)

it seems like it could eventually become boring. but not yet, thankfully.

― Sym Sym (sym), Wednesday, 1 June 2005 23:46 (twenty years ago)

It really does get boring pretty quickly.

― Hurting (Hurting), Thursday, 2 June 2005 01:45 (twenty years ago)

ten months pass...

this guy was a big fan

― kyle (akmonday), Monday, 17 April 2006 02:23 (nineteen years ago)

gouku
Guild Member
Posted: Mon Apr 17, 2006 1:00 am

> T_Sarducci wrote:
>> DeathStyles wrote:
>> the player in the article went by the name HippyGriff
>> he was a radio reg...
>> god this is fucked up situation =/

> And how do you know that, exactly?

check his profile... you can view his blog from there...

Proto
Junior Guild Member
Posted: Mon Apr 17, 2006 1:03 am

Oh.

I REALLY hope that Jick doesn't take this as an oppurtunity to give him a custom item.

― fez, Monday, 17 April 2006 07:50 (nineteen years ago)

http://forums.kingdomofloathing.com/profile.php?mode=viewprofile&u=11746

― fez, Monday, 17 April 2006 07:56 (nineteen years ago)

check his profile... you can view his blog from there...

http://ilx.p3r.net/userinfo.php?username=kenan

― ++-+-+--, Monday, 17 April 2006 12:50 (nineteen years ago)

three weeks pass...

Does anyone still play this? Myself and a friend have started our own, relatively active, clan (Team Splendid's Dance-O-Rama) and we want to get some nice people in. Can we poach any ILx0rs?

― emil.y (emil.y), Saturday, 13 May 2006 17:31 (nineteen years ago)

two months pass...

Clan ILXOR is empty except for luna and me, so yeah, i guess im gonna apply to Team Splendid's Dance-O-Rama.

― ferzaffe (flezaffe), Wednesday, 9 August 2006 10:57 (nineteen years ago)

I tried logging in for the first time in months the other day...all of my characters were deleted. ;_;

― the doaple gonger (nickalicious), Wednesday, 9 August 2006 14:51 (nineteen years ago)

ten months pass...

It really does get boring pretty quickly.
-- Hurting (Hurting), Thursday, June 2, 2005

unless you use the kolmafia client, which takes care of routine tasks like mixing, cooking, buffing, etc. unfortunately the client went kaput due to the massive content update last week.

― ☪, Sunday, 1 July 2007 16:18 (eighteen years ago)

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