American Chinese food

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Inspired by having just eaten too much crappy, yet oddly satisfying, American Chinese takeout: orange beef, salt and hot pepper shrimp, pot stickers, rice.

I'm fascinated that you can find Chinese takeout places in nearly every town in America, and they all seem to have exactly the same menu. It's surprising how few places actually attempt authentic Chinese cuisine. In Chicago's Chinatown, you'll typically find restaurants with two menus--one with the standard American Chinese stuff, in English, and another in Chinese with more authentic dishes--but out here in the boonies it's strictly General Tso's chicken and the like.

I haven't eaten chop suey since I was, I don't know, 8 or 9. And it's increasingly hard to find places that will serve that sort of thing.

Tell your stories/thoughts about American Chinese food here.

― amateurist, Monday, 9 April 2007 03:09 (eighteen years ago)

my favorite thing about the NYC fast food/american chinese places is the cheap-as-fuck chicken wings. also, the ability to get brown rice instead of gross fried rice most places is excellent. i often get general tso's chicken, or bean curd. there's a place near my house that actually has semi-decent mapo tofu, though nothing near the places in chinatown.

― ian, Monday, 9 April 2007 03:16 (eighteen years ago)

also 9 times out of 10 when i'm at one of those fast food chinese joints waiting for my food i will be the ONLY one ordering "chinese food" and not wings or 1/2 chickens with fries.

― ian, Monday, 9 April 2007 03:17 (eighteen years ago)

wasn't there a book that came out recently about the history of chinese food in america? i remember reading that the author was appearing somewhere and i wanted to go but couldn't. i still want to read it if i can locate a cheap copy.

― get bent, Monday, 9 April 2007 04:15 (eighteen years ago)

i like

-beef chow fun
-roast pork (with the red coloring!)
-boneless bbq spare ribs
-egg rolls
-scallion pancakes
-sesame chicken

― get bent, Monday, 9 April 2007 04:18 (eighteen years ago)

ooh and the "velvet" chicken corn soup

― get bent, Monday, 9 April 2007 04:28 (eighteen years ago)

Egg rolls & fried rice are flavorless grease party.

Tso's can be the the spicy yum or like mandarin chicken dyed a different color, and the mandarin can be like the sweet/sour-sour+orange color.

Pepper beef is usually a safe bet except the one time I got ground beef instead of...regular? And sometimes hardly any veg, or old veg. Fresh veg=yum. Sometimes it's just like fajitas on rice+msg.

A lot of places I've been to, th egg drop soup just tastes like thicker melted margarine!

Also people better damn well include msg. That stuff makes the yum.

― Abbott, Monday, 9 April 2007 04:29 (eighteen years ago)

there's a chain out here that does this sort of thing really well and beats the pants off panda express:

http://www.pickupstix.com/Home.html

― get bent, Monday, 9 April 2007 04:35 (eighteen years ago)

Me and my friend wrote a song about Panda Express once! It was called "(You Will Get Caught Up In The) SOCK PILE."

― Abbott, Monday, 9 April 2007 04:36 (eighteen years ago)

Good ol Pick Up Stix. Used to stop by one that was near the old house I rented.

― Ned Raggett, Monday, 9 April 2007 04:39 (eighteen years ago)

growing up in suburban rhode island there was a fantastic dish called szechuan wonton in hot oil, which was more or less just that. but the wontons were hand-made, even though the restaurant was located next to the supermarket in a strip mall. you could see the older women making them at a table in the back. i have found many a pale imitation, but nothing quite right. i haven't done extensive digging in chinatown, though; there's just so much else to eat when there, i don't see the point of looking for the dish i enjoyed most as an eight year-old.

― ian, Monday, 9 April 2007 04:50 (eighteen years ago)

there used to be a place (now long closed) in chinatown that had one of my favorite chinese dishes ever: it was just a big bowl of generously cubed chicken, black bean sauce with loads of corn starch, and thick, slurpy noodles. i've seen chicken w/ black bean sauce on other menus, but never served quite the same way.

― get bent, Monday, 9 April 2007 04:56 (eighteen years ago)

want good chinese food so much right now

vancouver bc is kind of insane with good/authentic chinese food - yeah i've eaten my fair share of sweet&sour pork but not all of it has been bright red and a lot of the chinese food i've eaten has been pretty straight-up homestyle awesome - though i've also eaten the higher-class 10-12-course chinese meal a few times - whoa. unbelievable.

i dare you all to eat authentic congee - it smells kind of like a horse barn and tastes like chicken and roots and will boost your immune system for like 3 weeks. i used to live near a place that had really good congee and if you ordered bbq chicken or pork they'd grab a cooked piece and cut it up right through the bone and everything and put it on a plate. it was always packed there, plus v few white people.

― rrrobyn, Monday, 9 April 2007 05:32 (eighteen years ago)

i did not answer the question really

― rrrobyn, Monday, 9 April 2007 05:32 (eighteen years ago)

want good chinese food so much right now

Yeah, I'm with you -- need to get some sleep but it would sure hit the spot. Some other time.

― Ned Raggett, Monday, 9 April 2007 05:33 (eighteen years ago)

i've seen all of these dishes served in china. same deal, basically.

in mainland china there are some popular taiwan and hong kong chain restaurants (24 hour places around train stations and downtown) that have almost the same menu as an american chinese restaurant. it looks different (no red dye and shit like that) but it's all about the same. eggrolls! potstickers! beef and broccoli! all that shit.

― dylannn, Monday, 9 April 2007 06:40 (eighteen years ago)

scallion pancakes and scallion + bread products are available on every street corner. these dudes near my school sell this amazing flakey dough full of scallions. you can drop 3 mao extra and get a fried egg inside. not bad.

sesame chicken... i remember taking these dudes visiting from canada to a joint that's famous for sesame chicken. they take a whole chicken, head to toe, chop it up, deepfry it with an equal amount of chilis, drizzle a bit of sesame oil on it, and plate it. not the same deal.

i live right in the middle of mainland china, so it ain't like i'm in hk or guangdong, where a lot of these american chinese dishes are from. but the same dishes spread here and changed to suit local tastes, just like they spread to america (and the rest of the world).

i shouldn't make it sound like shitty JADE GARDEN MANDARIN BUFFET food rules china... but the kung pao chicken (gong bao ji ding) and chow mein (chao mian) ain't that much different from what i ate in canada or america or europe. it's better here and definitely not the same! but not wildly different.

but no general tso's chicken, i don't think. i never ate that before and i'm still not sure what it is.

― dylannn, Monday, 9 April 2007 06:49 (eighteen years ago)

here in central NJ it's all just brown sauce that tastes like it's half corn syrup.

i don't even know if i've ever had "authentic" chinese food, to be honest, but there's a place up in hamilton that serves a dish called "congealed pork blood" and a bunch of other things that seem to terrifying to my sheltered american mind. i had their version of some standard chinese chicken dish and it was great, didn't have that thick, disgusting generic sweet sauce and they didn't assume that i couldn't handle spices.

my favorite chinese place in the world is the little place that was (and hopefully still is) near the philly record exchange. they have a killer vegetarian menu; i once had a serious craving for string beans in garlic and theirs was just so perfect. so damn perfect.

― GOTT PUNCH II HAWKWINDZ, Monday, 9 April 2007 07:22 (eighteen years ago)

americanized thai food and indian food >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>american chinese food (i have never had "authetic" chinese food, but i'm sure i'd like some of it)

― gershy, Monday, 9 April 2007 07:26 (eighteen years ago)

say what you will about americanized chinese food, but fast food general tso's is the shit.

― modestmickey, Monday, 9 April 2007 11:04 (eighteen years ago)

but also, i kind of reject the notion that "americanized" chinese food is necessarily all that different, and un-authentic. i've obviously never been to china to test this theory though. but one of the standard chinese food places around here with general tso's, lo mein, blah blah, i've been frequenting pretty regularly and developed a little relationship with the owner. i asked her one time about how her food compared to the food where she's from and how much she changes it for an american clientele. she told me it's basically the same, but a bit spicier in her home town, and there's a bunch of pretty common chinese dishes they don't serve over here. she invited me to try one of these with her, and i turned her down, but looking at it it didn't seem radically different from what we're used to. so, i really don't buy into the "american chinese" myth too much.

― modestmickey, Monday, 9 April 2007 11:08 (eighteen years ago)

about a thousand years ago i delivered chinese food in massachusetts and the family that ran the restaurant would cook a huge meal for the 6 of us every night. it was never the shit that we sold.

― chicago kevin, Monday, 9 April 2007 13:25 (eighteen years ago)

moo goo gai pan y'all

― m coleman, Monday, 9 April 2007 13:32 (eighteen years ago)

Chop suey is the original Americanized Chinese dish - here. That said, it's still pretty good.

― Jenny, Monday, 9 April 2007 13:34 (eighteen years ago)

This is a really interesting Slate article about the history of Chinese food in America.

My favorite Chinese take out is Hunan soft tofu and ma po tofu and plain old chicken and steamed vegetables but I have no idea if those are authentic or Americanized.

― Jenny, Monday, 9 April 2007 13:38 (eighteen years ago)

I know I've repped for this place before, but my favorite American Chinese food is from First Wok in Grand Rapids, MI. It's the first place I ever had Chinese (or even "Chinese") food, and I've been in NYC for almost 10 years and still haven't beat it (altho the Dumpling House $1 special is a thing of beauty, for sure).

Anyway, my favorite item of American Chinese food is without question THE CRAB RANGOON from the establishment above. I had some at Christmas vacay, I savored every bite.

― Laurel, Monday, 9 April 2007 13:41 (eighteen years ago)

is it real crab or teh stick?

― m coleman, Monday, 9 April 2007 13:45 (eighteen years ago)

not trying to bust yr chops but I get nervous about eating ocean things in the midwest, though apparently sushi is everywhere these days

― m coleman, Monday, 9 April 2007 13:48 (eighteen years ago)

I have no idea what kind of crab, actually, it's in very small bits and mixed into a scallion cream cheese and wrapped in wonton, fried, and served with hot mustard & sweet sauce. So it pretty much doesn't matter.

Anyway, seafood everywhere is frozen now, unless you're like in Vinylhaven and you just bought a lobster from the nice fisherman on the corner. Even sushi-grade giant specialty tuna are frozen in the Far East and flown or shipped here, aren't they??

― Laurel, Monday, 9 April 2007 13:54 (eighteen years ago)

Hot and sour soup, get in me.

― nickalicious, Monday, 9 April 2007 13:57 (eighteen years ago)

not trying to bust yr chops but I get nervous about eating ocean things in the midwest, though apparently sushi is everywhere these days

Oh come on dude, it might not be as plentiful or cheap as near coastal areas, but there's plenty of good seafood in the midwest.

xpost

― Jordan, Monday, 9 April 2007 13:57 (eighteen years ago)

yeah I just realized that the "wild" salmon I've been buying is relatively cheap becuase it's been previously frozen. still tastes good.

I burned out on that fake crab tho -- too many c/o california rolls.

xpost^^

sure jordan but I really like brook trout & lake whitefish which don't taste as good on the coast

― m coleman, Monday, 9 April 2007 14:00 (eighteen years ago)

http://i4.peapod.com/c/IB/IBL6J.jpg

― m coleman, Monday, 9 April 2007 14:07 (eighteen years ago)

All crab rangoon is prepped and frozen at some crab rangoon factory in Mexico and shipped via Sysco food delivery services to Chinese restaurants in the midwest and on the coasts.

― Jenny, Monday, 9 April 2007 14:11 (eighteen years ago)

la choy products are why I didn't get into chinese food until I moved to new york. there were chinese restarants in ohio & michigan in the 70s but I was kind of a meat & taters guy. fish = mrs paul's stix.

― m coleman, Monday, 9 April 2007 14:17 (eighteen years ago)

I don't know, Jenny, the "crab cheese" at First Wok are different! I can't find them as good anywhere else.

― Laurel, Monday, 9 April 2007 14:25 (eighteen years ago)

jenny, the place i worked minced their own crab. and they got it from a place in quincy, ma. that was allegedly fresh but i don't want to think about eating crabs from boston's south shore.

― chicago kevin, Monday, 9 April 2007 14:27 (eighteen years ago)

i dare you all to eat authentic congee - it smells kind of like a horse barn and tastes like chicken and roots and will boost your immune system for like 3 weeks.

there are a ton of different kinds. i like duck liver/ginger and pork/preserved egg the most, i think.

― lauren, Monday, 9 April 2007 14:36 (eighteen years ago)

ian, in manhattan you could try one of the grand sichuan branches (not the chinatown one) or wu liang ye for your wonton in hot oil needs.

― lauren, Monday, 9 April 2007 14:37 (eighteen years ago)

baltimore is a hellish hole of no decent chinese food

― strongohulkington, Monday, 9 April 2007 14:44 (eighteen years ago)

i seriously need to stop moving to cities where i can't get good chinese

― strongohulkington, Monday, 9 April 2007 14:44 (eighteen years ago)

I am skeptical, Laurel and Kevin! Skeptical!

― Jenny, Monday, 9 April 2007 15:18 (eighteen years ago)

Hey no prob. More crag cheese for me.

― Laurel, Monday, 9 April 2007 15:20 (eighteen years ago)

Er. Crab. Please.

― Laurel, Monday, 9 April 2007 15:20 (eighteen years ago)

I think "crag" is how Sysco lists it on their delivery checklist so maybe you ARE getting something different.

― Jenny, Monday, 9 April 2007 15:20 (eighteen years ago)

crag ranboon

― nickalicious, Monday, 9 April 2007 15:23 (eighteen years ago)

laurel would eat all this crag cheese

― nabisco, Monday, 9 April 2007 18:03 (eighteen years ago)

As long as Chicago remains a mecca for good Thai food, I basically have no reason to ever eat Chinese.

― jaymc, Monday, 9 April 2007 18:07 (eighteen years ago)

omg racest

― gff, Monday, 9 April 2007 18:10 (eighteen years ago)

Crag cheese:

http://k53.pbase.com/o4/91/43791/1/64432804.VUoVDdTO._S8E5750_swiss_raclette.jpg

― Laurel, Monday, 9 April 2007 18:12 (eighteen years ago)

This town (Madison) sucks for Chinese food. :( Milwaukee and Chicago are pretty tight, at least.

― Jordan, Monday, 9 April 2007 18:13 (eighteen years ago)

Not racist! Just that when I'm in the mood for steamed vegetables, tofu, and rice or noodles, I'll choose Thai every single time. Mostly because I like the sauces better. No curry, no credibility.

― jaymc, Monday, 9 April 2007 18:18 (eighteen years ago)

thai and chinese aren't really very similar.

xpost

― lauren, Monday, 9 April 2007 18:20 (eighteen years ago)

chinese food restaurant down the road from me is "mandarin garden". when my dad was living in the same neighborhood in college, it was called "mandarin schezhuan garden" with a big sign out front that said "MSG".

― elmo argonaut, Monday, 9 April 2007 18:20 (eighteen years ago)

I used to love good Chinese food but was put right off it when, a couple of years ago while eating in what was supposed to be a very good and "authentic" restaurant in NYC chinatown, I found a HUGE cockroach lying on its back on top of a piece of brocolli that I was just about to cut into. The waiter tried to convince me it was a mushroom (it wasn't - last time I checked mushrooms had neither legs nor wings)and then actually tried to charge us for the meal.

― ENBB, Monday, 9 April 2007 18:21 (eighteen years ago)

Awww water bugs are so cute.

― Laurel, Monday, 9 April 2007 18:22 (eighteen years ago)

HEY THANKS GUESS I'M NOT ABOUT TO WALK TO THE CHINESE PLACE FOR LUNCH ANYMORE

― nabisco, Monday, 9 April 2007 18:22 (eighteen years ago)

Actually if I imagine that mushroom conversation in any more detail I'm going to have to get a multiple-sealed yogurt for lunch.

― nabisco, Monday, 9 April 2007 18:24 (eighteen years ago)

WITHOUT fruit on the bottom.

― nabisco, Monday, 9 April 2007 18:24 (eighteen years ago)

roaches gross me out but i'm kind of used to them in restaurants. one fell on my head in b&h dairy restaurant, and i still eat there.

― lauren, Monday, 9 April 2007 18:25 (eighteen years ago)

eating chinese in nyc chinatown is risky, i lived down there for 2.5 years so i probably ate the equivalent of one whole stray cat

― elmo argonaut, Monday, 9 April 2007 18:25 (eighteen years ago)

Yeah, don't think about until Chinese food or eating at all for that matter isn't in your immediate future. I will say though that the conversation with the waiter, which was done all while whispering so as not to alarm the other customers, was pretty damn ridiculous.

― ENBB, Monday, 9 April 2007 18:25 (eighteen years ago)

I know, I lived there too while I was in college. I should have known better but this place had really good reviews!

― ENBB, Monday, 9 April 2007 18:26 (eighteen years ago)

i mean, too many are indicative of some kind of problem but i think (and i could be wrong) that a few are inevitable and not what causes food poisoning. obviously finding one cooked into the food is a different story.

xposts

― lauren, Monday, 9 April 2007 18:27 (eighteen years ago)

also, i've spent years eating in nyc's chinatown and haven't had any problems save for one instance which didn't lead to anything worse than being grossed out.

― lauren, Monday, 9 April 2007 18:29 (eighteen years ago)

Yeah, my parents were restaurant owners and roaches actually come into restaruants in the produce boxes and other things. Most places are fumigated regularly because it is inevitable. You're exactly right though - the main problem with this situation is that it was right there on top staring at me!

― ENBB, Monday, 9 April 2007 18:29 (eighteen years ago)

My rule is basically that any roaches I see have to be either on the floor or below the two-foot mark on the wall. Those are roaches who know their place, which is not in the food and not high enough to fall into the food.

ENBB, am I reading you correctly that the roach had been, umm ... cooked?

― nabisco, Monday, 9 April 2007 18:37 (eighteen years ago)

thai and chinese aren't really very similar.

Oh come on, I know we all like to pretend that we're so cultured and everything, but this is silly.

― jaymc, Monday, 9 April 2007 18:43 (eighteen years ago)

Well, either it was stir fried with the rest of the veg or the chef had put it front and center as some sort of garnish. I didn't examine it closely enough that I can 100% confirm that it was cooked but I think it's safe to assume that it was. Either way it was pretty gross.

― ENBB, Monday, 9 April 2007 18:46 (eighteen years ago)

chinese food is too "bluesy" for me

― ghost rider, Monday, 9 April 2007 18:49 (eighteen years ago)

lol

― Jordan, Monday, 9 April 2007 18:50 (eighteen years ago)

titter

― n/a, Monday, 9 April 2007 18:54 (eighteen years ago)

Something I sometimes wonder is how 'authentic' is the 'good' Chinese food that you get in e.g. the Dundas/Spadina-ish Chinatown in Toronto? I much prefer this stuff to 'American Chinese food' but, for example, are/were all those vegetarian recipes actually common in China? (I've no doubt that lychee and young coconut are common dessert items though.)

Anyway, my life has been complete since I found a restaurant in Buffalo that serves bitter melon.

― Sundar, Monday, 9 April 2007 18:56 (eighteen years ago)

Chop suey is the one Americanized dish my dad frowns upon. He doesn't like more than one vegetable per dish.

Also, as said upthread, most "American" Chinese food dishes are "authentic" too.

Also, pot stickers are totally authentic.

― Spencer Chow, Monday, 9 April 2007 19:05 (eighteen years ago)

i want to hear more about abbott's panda express song.

― get bent, Monday, 9 April 2007 19:09 (eighteen years ago)

whatever, jaymc. to me, thai and chinese are fairly different.

― lauren, Monday, 9 April 2007 19:15 (eighteen years ago)

I agree with Lauren here. I mean, do you think Japanese and Chinese are alike?

― Ms Misery, Monday, 9 April 2007 19:17 (eighteen years ago)

Many thai restaurants serve chinese dishes in addition to uniquely thai food.

― Spencer Chow, Monday, 9 April 2007 19:20 (eighteen years ago)

it's all their fault!

― Ms Misery, Monday, 9 April 2007 19:24 (eighteen years ago)

I mean, do you think Japanese and Chinese are alike?

There are definite similarities. Not as many, because when I think Japanese, the first thing I think is sushi.

But like I said earlier, if I go into either a Thai restaurant or a Chinese restaurant, I'm going to be ordering something that's composed of mixed vegetables, tofu, either rice or noodles, in a sauce that can be made spicy. I think this is pretty similar, and claiming otherwise is willfully obtuse.

― jaymc, Monday, 9 April 2007 19:29 (eighteen years ago)

This thread made me get fried rice for lunch. Which I'm eating now. So I thank you all.

― Ned Raggett, Monday, 9 April 2007 19:32 (eighteen years ago)

Well also: even though the overall categories of Thai and Chinese cuisines are different, the kinds of common items you're going to get from casual restaurants are exactly the ones that are most in common between them -- the stir-fry and noodle stuff J's talking about. (Though the curries are a bonus on that front.)

Plus even beyond just having a Chinese section on the back of the menu, I get the sense that a lot of the Americanization of Thai places involves slanting your dishes toward what Americans are already used to, which turns out to be ... Chinese food.

― nabisco, Monday, 9 April 2007 19:33 (eighteen years ago)

Sorry, xpost

― nabisco, Monday, 9 April 2007 19:34 (eighteen years ago)

yes, there's a definite convergence of stir-fried stuff in anonymous brown sauce.

― lauren, Monday, 9 April 2007 19:36 (eighteen years ago)

Anonymous brown sauce = why I prefer Thai food to Chinese.

― jaymc, Monday, 9 April 2007 19:42 (eighteen years ago)

To be fair, that sort of thing is kind of like Basic Human Food for the bulk of the planet. I mean, rice + chopped-up veg/meat cooked in some kind of spicy oil/sauce.

― nabisco, Monday, 9 April 2007 19:45 (eighteen years ago)

cream cheez wontons are the fucking bomb.

― M@tt He1ges0n, Monday, 9 April 2007 19:50 (eighteen years ago)

I think the problem is that laurenp is talking about Chinese food, and jaymc is talking about "chinese" food (no fault of his own, it's the thread topic).

Americanized Thai, Chinese and Japanese restaurants use mostly Chinese (or Latin) cooks and tastes have become so blended and homogenized that they may seem all similar.

Authentic Chinese food is much more diverse than authentic (?) "American" food... in my opinion, it's a little hard for "us" to grasp the millions of recipes that make up the culinary landscape representing all the distinct culinary regions of China.

― Steve Shasta, Monday, 9 April 2007 20:41 (eighteen years ago)

It's interesting how in the US, Chinese food has somehow become conservative and familiar while Thai and Vietnamese are more fashionable. I wonder what the next hip cuisine will be?

I think part of the blame is the increasingly heavy sauces which American Chinese food emphasizes - not to say they aren't authentic, but their amount and thickness is really over the top. By contrast, Thai restaurants seem to have more understated sauces (although their chinese dishes are sometimes too watery). I'm sure a dish or two will become standard, and then certain ingredients will be "turned up a notch" - probably the heaviest.

― Spencer Chow, Monday, 9 April 2007 20:53 (eighteen years ago)

chinese food restaurant down the road from me is "mandarin garden". when my dad was living in the same neighborhood in college, it was called "mandarin schezhuan garden" with a big sign out front that said "MSG".

-- elmo argonaut, Monday, April 9, 2007 2:20 PM (2 hours ago)

my favorite chinese place in chapel hill had a huge sign that said "PARKING FOR CHINESE ONLY"

― modestmickey, Monday, 9 April 2007 20:58 (eighteen years ago)

an ex-girlfriend's town's only chinese place had a huge sign that said "SHANGHI". the other side said "SHANGHAI".

― modestmickey, Monday, 9 April 2007 20:59 (eighteen years ago)

atnightattheimprovwithmickey.jpg

― Mr. Que, Monday, 9 April 2007 20:59 (eighteen years ago)

If and when I am executed by the state, my last meal will surely be General Tso's chicken at Sammy's Noodle Shop in NYC. I'd follow that general to hell and back, I would.

― Manalishi, Monday, 9 April 2007 21:01 (eighteen years ago)

Spencer,

Authentic Chinese is pretty hip!

Steve Shasta

― Steve Shasta, Monday, 9 April 2007 21:08 (eighteen years ago)

cream cheez wontons yuk! i mistakenly ordered these last week, they didn't even disclose it on the menu. cheese being the centerpiece of ANYTHING is just fucking wrong.

― tremendoid, Monday, 9 April 2007 21:27 (eighteen years ago)

Yeah, you are not blood diamonds.

― Laurel, Monday, 9 April 2007 21:30 (eighteen years ago)

I think part of the blame is the increasingly heavy sauces which American Chinese food emphasizes - not to say they aren't authentic, but their amount and thickness is really over the top.

a Chinese friend said a lot of the restaurants also add a lot of sugar to sauces to match perceived American preferences. He makes a point of taking me to a lot of authentic places in Monterey Park and whatnot but I think I still prefer Americanized, hip or not. It's mostly consistency; watery, soft, and saucy cooking isn't my thing for the most part, and that's what I usually find at those places.

― tremendoid, Monday, 9 April 2007 21:34 (eighteen years ago)

cheese being the centerpiece of ANYTHING is just fucking wrong.

Putting cheese in the middle of things is practically the entire point of food!

― Jordan, Monday, 9 April 2007 21:36 (eighteen years ago)

re: authenticity: yeah i'd love to find a place that was strictly cantonese or mandarin or etc.

― gff, Monday, 9 April 2007 21:37 (eighteen years ago)

http://www.stiknstein.com/wp-content/uploads/2006/10/deep%2520fried%2520cheese%2520curds.jpg

― Jordan, Monday, 9 April 2007 21:38 (eighteen years ago)

i think part of the appeal of thai food, when it "got" here, was that it seemed, to us, like Chinese + Indian (or rice/veg/meat + curry, occasionally). like it was different but really not different.

― gff, Monday, 9 April 2007 21:38 (eighteen years ago)

Foody Goody Super Buffet in Springfield.

― aimurchie, Monday, 9 April 2007 23:55 (eighteen years ago)

verdict from "great china" in madison, wi:

1. pot stickers = waaaay too much dough, almost impossible to actually chew, but reasonably tasty with sauce

2. orange beef = gross. horrible, gristly meat, swamped in salty sauce, mushy reheated broccoli

3 salt and hot pepper shrimp = pretty decent, actually. on a bed of lettuce.

jordan, what chinese places in madison are tolerable? or am i barking up the wrong tree?

― amateurist, Tuesday, 10 April 2007 00:12 (eighteen years ago)

cream cheez wontons yuk!

i knew that these existed but i'd never actually had them until about a month ago at a catered event. they were weird. i love cream cheese and i love wontons and i should really love anything that makes chinese food even MORE jew-friendly, but i wasn't digging the combination too much.

― get bent, Tuesday, 10 April 2007 02:44 (eighteen years ago)

but the concept of "philly rolls" is also quite strange to me.

― get bent, Tuesday, 10 April 2007 02:46 (eighteen years ago)

Since I moved to "Little Saigon" (no-one really calls it that much, but that's what it is) I have determined that I don't like authentic Asian foods. I don't really care for Vietnamese at all, Thai is pretty good, and Chinese I only like in its most Americanized forms. Crab rangoon, sweet and sour chicken, sesame chicken. No, I do not want bible tripe, chicken feet, crunchy jellyfish appetizers, or soft tendon. And please to stop scenting my street with smells (like a feather pillow soaked in fish sauce, boiled with beef bones) that make me gag early in the morning, thx.

― Jesse, Tuesday, 10 April 2007 04:09 (eighteen years ago)

Going back a bit, I have to say that Chinese and Thai are quite distinct. This seems pretty obvious. It could be that John's familiarity with the cuisines is limited by the limitation of ordering meatless and therefore not seeing how something like Thom Yum or Thom Ka Kai would not exist in Chinese? But I guess these could be meatless too, so who knows.

I guess my familiarity with the differences comes from working at a restaurant with a Thai chef, and from living where I do.

But then again, I can kind of tell differences between different regions of Mexican and Indian, so, again, who knows.

― Jesse, Tuesday, 10 April 2007 04:19 (eighteen years ago)

"a Chinese friend said a lot of the restaurants also add a lot of sugar to sauces to match perceived American preferences"

a lot of chinese food in china is far sweeter than anything americans eat. i visit nanjing or shanghai and it's like i'm eating penny candy the whole time i'm there. sweet dumplings, sweet soup, sweet pork. everything absurdly sweet and i can't wait to get back to my hometown where chili, salt and lamb fat rules the table.

everything yall got in america, we got up in the middle kingdom.

except:
crab rangoons.

― dylannn, Tuesday, 10 April 2007 07:57 (eighteen years ago)

Cheese as a centerpiece is COMPLETELY right, btw.

― Jesse, Tuesday, 10 April 2007 11:54 (eighteen years ago)

Amateurist, I've been pretty disappointed by most places here, but last week I tried takeout from a new joint on the west side that I liked, Grand China. I had some hot & spicy shrimp and the shrimp were HUEG and tasty, veggies tasted pretty fresh too. Place is on Gammon, near Old Sauk. Imperial Garden in Middleton doesn't suck too badly either.

I think you'll have better luck with Thai (Lao Laan Xang) or Vietnamese (Vientiane Palace by 4*, I guess?) in this town.

― Jordan, Tuesday, 10 April 2007 13:06 (eighteen years ago)

The only time I ever got honest to god food poisoning was from an Americanized Chinese buffet in North Carolina. I still can't eat buffet Chinese food, and I will never go to a buffet within two hours of closing. Woof.

But Jesse - not all Vietnamese food contains organ meat! Lemongrass tofu from Pho 777 is deeeeeelicious and completely organ meat-free.

― Jenny, Tuesday, 10 April 2007 13:18 (eighteen years ago)

Yes, Thai and Chinese are distinct cuisines. No, they are not so distinct that comparing one to the other, or using one as a point of reference for the other, is ridiculous or racist.

I had pad kee mao with mock duck last night. (For some reason, I've only found one Asian restaurant here that serves mock duck as a meat-free substitute alongside tofu.)

― jaymc, Tuesday, 10 April 2007 13:22 (eighteen years ago)

hell i really want chinese food tonight now.

― Ste, Tuesday, 10 April 2007 13:29 (eighteen years ago)

Jaymc - Mock duck good? There's a thai retaurant near me that is completely vegan and amazing yet I've never been able to bring my self to try the mock duck or mock seafood. I normally just stick to the mock beef which is incredible.

― ENBB, Tuesday, 10 April 2007 13:42 (eighteen years ago)

http://www.best-horror-movies.com/images/Frankenstein-headshot-smaller.jpg

MOCK DUCK ... GOOOOD!

― n/a, Tuesday, 10 April 2007 14:27 (eighteen years ago)

Yeah, thanks. Sometimes my brain works faster than my finger and I leave out whole words!

― ENBB, Tuesday, 10 April 2007 14:31 (eighteen years ago)

I wonder what the next hip cuisine will be?

Burmese?

― Ned Raggett, Tuesday, 10 April 2007 14:32 (eighteen years ago)

The mock duck was very good, although it's basically just seitan, I think, which is good at soaking up flavors. And I've never had duck in my life, so I can't tell you how faithful of an imitation it is.

― jaymc, Tuesday, 10 April 2007 14:49 (eighteen years ago)

I've never had mock duck, but I feel safe in saying duck > mock.

― Jordan, Tuesday, 10 April 2007 15:02 (eighteen years ago)

And I've never had duck in my life, so I can't tell you how faithful of an imitation it is.

Oh dude that is such a bummer :(

― ian, Tuesday, 10 April 2007 16:16 (eighteen years ago)

JAMYC WHY U ALWAYS MOCK DUCK

― Jordan, Tuesday, 10 April 2007 16:19 (eighteen years ago)

There's probably lots of meat that I'd have had by now if I hadn't gone vegetarian in 1998. I don't know that I've ever had lobster, although I eat seafood now, so I'll have to do that soon.

― jaymc, Tuesday, 10 April 2007 16:19 (eighteen years ago)

no, lobster is pretty overrated.

― Mr. Que, Tuesday, 10 April 2007 16:20 (eighteen years ago)

just seeing this thread in top answers makes me want chinese.

but there's none to be had in my vicinity. :(

I've never had Lobster either but don't know if I can knowing how it's cooked (and I'm not veg.)

― Ms Misery, Tuesday, 10 April 2007 16:20 (eighteen years ago)

what i've never had is lobster from a chinese restaurant! maybe i should find the grimiest, worst chinese restaurant i can and order a lobster dish.

― ian, Tuesday, 10 April 2007 16:25 (eighteen years ago)

Some cooks put them in the freezer for awhile first so they are basically in a deep, cryogenic sleep when they drop them in the hot water. Also, other places dispatch them with an icepick into the back of the brain to kill them pre-boiling. So there's always that.

― Jenny, Tuesday, 10 April 2007 16:27 (eighteen years ago)

"If Sietsema were to visit a Yum's, he would probably learn that if D.C. does, in fact, have a regional specialty, it's probably chicken wings and mambo sauce."

― daria-g, Tuesday, 10 April 2007 16:31 (eighteen years ago)

oops! bother. Yum's

― daria-g, Tuesday, 10 April 2007 16:31 (eighteen years ago)

!!!! i give up.
https://secure.washingtoncitypaper.com/cgi-bin/Archive/abridged2.bat?path=q:%5CDocRoot/2002/020426/YUMS

― daria-g, Tuesday, 10 April 2007 16:32 (eighteen years ago)

so Jenny, I should inquire about their kill methods before ordering? (of course this makes good sense but seems it might generally ruin the meal. I'm just a wuss)

― Ms Misery, Tuesday, 10 April 2007 16:34 (eighteen years ago)

Hang on, is slowly freezing a lobster better than quickly boiling one?

― ailsa, Tuesday, 10 April 2007 16:36 (eighteen years ago)

(for the lobster, I mean)

― ailsa, Tuesday, 10 April 2007 16:36 (eighteen years ago)

Chinese wave of the future -- Little Sheep!

http://www.xfy.com.cn/ (For the initial WTFness)

http://www.xfy.cn/en/index2.asp (For the English site)

"Chinese little sheep, worldwide little sheep!"

― Ned Raggett, Tuesday, 10 April 2007 16:38 (eighteen years ago)

this thread needs more pictures.

http://www.bridgeandtunnelclub.com/bigmap/brooklyn/fortgreene/walk/partone/01wok.jpg

http://www.sci.brooklyn.cuny.edu/%7Esdexter/images/mikael/index-Images/15.jpg

http://www.doyoufeelloved.com/photos/archives/images/panda_garden.jpg

― ian, Tuesday, 10 April 2007 16:50 (eighteen years ago)

― ian, Tuesday, 10 April 2007 17:03 (eighteen years ago)

oh hell i forgot to convert html to bbcode.

http://static.flickr.com/82/272209149_03f3892376.jpg
http://www.starportfoods.com/Garlic%2520ChickenPltC.jpg
http://www.pjchmiel.com/photo/food/marks-generaltso.jpg

― ian, Tuesday, 10 April 2007 17:04 (eighteen years ago)

Chinese restaurants a nutritionist's nightmare, group says

"Group says in some ways, Mexican and Italian restaurants are worse"

lol, NEWSFLASH

― Jordan, Tuesday, 10 April 2007 17:10 (eighteen years ago)

I had a chicken in peanut sauce lean cuisine with a heavy application of crushed red pepper. poor, poor substitute.

― Ms Misery, Tuesday, 10 April 2007 17:11 (eighteen years ago)

Why does that Panda Garden place have a picture of a koala on it? Way to make me trust the content of your dishes, guys.

― ailsa, Tuesday, 10 April 2007 17:14 (eighteen years ago)

is general tso's chicken an east coast concoction? I don't think I've ever seen it in a restaurant here.

― tremendoid, Tuesday, 10 April 2007 17:35 (eighteen years ago)

Who Was General Tso and Why Are We Eating His Chicken?

― jaymc, Tuesday, 10 April 2007 17:37 (eighteen years ago)

no, lobster is pretty overrated.

I almost agree with this--saying "lobster dinner" is an easy shortcut for saying "the very best," and while it's DELICIOUS, I think it shrinks and pales in comparison to the stunningly amazing flavor of Alaskan King Crab, which, when dipped in drawn butter, is unspeakably great.

― Jesse, Wednesday, 11 April 2007 04:47 (eighteen years ago)

lobster is amazing and wonderful. i had good lobster with laurel @ belgian place in the west village over my winter break. would go again!

― get bent, Wednesday, 11 April 2007 06:08 (eighteen years ago)

i know lobster is supposed to be the cockroach of the sea but i don't care. plus it's just one of the funnest foods to eat/dissect. it has its own fork!

― get bent, Wednesday, 11 April 2007 06:09 (eighteen years ago)

i realize that it's all a matter of taste

BUT

if you think lobster is overrated, you've probably never had good lobster.

― Steve Shasta, Wednesday, 11 April 2007 06:38 (eighteen years ago)

or you've had good lobster all your life

― JW, Wednesday, 11 April 2007 06:42 (eighteen years ago)

is general tso's chicken an east coast concoction? I don't think I've ever seen it in a restaurant here.

at kung pao bistro on ventura blvd and laurel cyn its called ROBOT CHICKEN.. also a vegitarion option.

― chaki, Wednesday, 11 April 2007 06:49 (eighteen years ago)

dude ned my roommate met his girlfriend in a LITTLE SHEEP (the name is really LITTLE FAT SHEEP i dunno what's with that translation-- i guess "the healthy delicacy" slogan they're pushing doesn't jive with an overweight sheep). this girl i met in a club and some of my friends from the people's liberation army got wasted and the girl brought some hideous country girl to hook up with me. but i dodged that shit and got wasted with my army friends on light beer and got kicked out. my roommate walked right into that bleached white face/brown necked trap and hooked up with the rural hoe. i'm fo sho gonna eat there in vancouver. good memories.

there's a rival LITTLE WHITE SHEEP (the names rhyme sorta in chinese) that's sort of an entry level middle class family joint, too. it's another place that's got the same sort of menu as an american chinese joint. all the classic chinese dishes sorta watered down and classed up just a tad.

― dylannn, Wednesday, 11 April 2007 14:08 (eighteen years ago)

?!?

― Ms Misery, Wednesday, 11 April 2007 14:12 (eighteen years ago)

worse than amer chinese food, chinese american food. outside of like... beijing, shanghai, nanjing, and any other place without a huge pop. of foreign students/workers, it's amazing. really, really, really unbelievably bad. american food made by people that have only experienced it on tv. i can't believe how bad it is. it's the worst food i have ever eaten.

there are no charming hybrid dishes like amer chinese food has produced. or lots of other meetings of cuisines have produced (like the "old beijing" wrap at chinese kfcs!). it's just shitshitshitshitshitshit nonstop shit.

― dylannn, Wednesday, 11 April 2007 14:17 (eighteen years ago)

even smallish cities have a western restaurant. my friend from nanjing visited me and is used to a steady supply of western food. i took him to an AUTHENTIC AMERICAN BEEFSTEAK place downtown. the place was full of those fat crewcut dudes in ARMANI sweaters that spend all day hotboxing gov't-bought volkswagen santanas and buicks with fake marlboros and want to eat some genuine beefsteak before hitting the attached ktv/massage joint.

they serve a steak on a cast iron skillet. the beef tastes like dog meat, gamey or something in the most unpleasant way possible since beef should smell like beef and not gamey, and it's chewy and freezerburnt and it's covered in tomato sauce. the rest of the skillet is taken up with the spaghetti, which is naked except for a sprinkling of frozen corn and peas, and a fried egg.

― dylannn, Wednesday, 11 April 2007 14:21 (eighteen years ago)

Jesus, that sounds gaggy.

― Rock Hardy, Wednesday, 11 April 2007 14:26 (eighteen years ago)

http://farm1.static.flickr.com/50/109792597_39a636e201.jpg

― Jenny, Wednesday, 11 April 2007 14:29 (eighteen years ago)

And while I'm at it, for shits and giggles:

http://farm1.static.flickr.com/3/3395220_fbd74acc56.jpg

The bird, the cat, the lobster, and the photos belong to Jesse.

― Jenny, Wednesday, 11 April 2007 14:30 (eighteen years ago)

there was an "american" chinese restaurant ( i think hong kong-style) in nyc's chinatown, called steak specialist. most dishes were served with a side of spaghetti and ham or macaroni. it didn't last long. you can get things like that at a fair number of restaurants/cafes, but as far as i know there isn't a dedicated place anymore.

xposts

― lauren, Wednesday, 11 April 2007 14:31 (eighteen years ago)

There are about 10 restaurants I know of which serve "Chinese-take-on-Western food" in San Francisco. It's a major HK thing that got exported.

There are Japanese versions too that serve "pizza" (with fish and mayonaisse), "spaghetti" (topped with fermented soybeans and sour plum paste), and hamburger (petite patty served open faced with curry).

― Steve Shasta, Wednesday, 11 April 2007 16:21 (eighteen years ago)

japanese-style spaghetti with spicy seafood sauce is tasty.

― lauren, Wednesday, 11 April 2007 18:37 (eighteen years ago)

So just who is this General Tso, anyway?

― nickalicious, Wednesday, 11 April 2007 18:52 (eighteen years ago)

and how is it different from Specific Tso?

― chicago kevin, Wednesday, 11 April 2007 18:53 (eighteen years ago)

haha, lauren is such a sucker for curry squid!!!

― Steve Shasta, Wednesday, 11 April 2007 20:41 (eighteen years ago)

His name was actually Me Tso. There's a soup named after him. He was known for having a very active sex drive, a fact popularized in film and that 2 Live Crew song.

― Jesse, Thursday, 12 April 2007 01:23 (eighteen years ago)

nine months pass...

Curry chicken lunch special with brown rice & coca cola.

― ian, Monday, 11 February 2008 20:26 (seventeen years ago)

http://www.bridgeandtunnelclub.com/bigmap/queens/flushing/kingyum/index.htm

― dan selzer, Monday, 11 February 2008 20:28 (seventeen years ago)

daily chineeefoo consumption log

― jergïns, Monday, 11 February 2008 20:31 (seventeen years ago)

oh god, dan... i want to eat it all.

― ian, Monday, 11 February 2008 20:33 (seventeen years ago)

this is making me so hungry

― Mark Clemente, Monday, 11 February 2008 20:38 (seventeen years ago)

I've been to two Chinese restaurants since my "Thai > Chinese" comments upthread, and they were both pretty gross. Some of my dining companions, however, reported <3 <3 <3, so it's probably just me.

― jaymc, Monday, 11 February 2008 20:43 (seventeen years ago)

i have really come around to ghetto chinese food

― bell_labs, Monday, 11 February 2008 20:52 (seventeen years ago)

pretty sure i have never ordered takeout chinese in nyc(!)

i want egg foo young now

― sleep, Monday, 11 February 2008 20:56 (seventeen years ago)

oh dude, vic, it's like a whole new world of cheap eats.

― ian, Monday, 11 February 2008 20:56 (seventeen years ago)

chinese takeout in nyc >>>> chinese takeout anywhere else in u.s. (that i've tried)

― get bent, Monday, 11 February 2008 20:57 (seventeen years ago)

i want kung pow tofuuuuuu

― bell_labs, Monday, 11 February 2008 20:59 (seventeen years ago)

Vic what the hell is wrong w/ you, there's Chinese take-out everywhere! The place across from Southpaw is shocking really okay considering it looks like every other cheap tile-floored Chinese place ever.

― Laurel, Monday, 11 February 2008 20:59 (seventeen years ago)

new jersey has good chinese takeout too

― get bent, Monday, 11 February 2008 21:00 (seventeen years ago)

i know, i see them everywhere! but none of them are as close as tony's pizza and im pretty lazy so

xpost

― sleep, Monday, 11 February 2008 21:00 (seventeen years ago)

i think east met west is closer than the bagel place though

― sleep, Monday, 11 February 2008 21:01 (seventeen years ago)

I love good chinese takeout but even better love the kind of middle class for jewish patrons sit-down american chinese places that mostly seem to exist in Park Slope. I'm looking at you Hunan Delight and Human Wok and Red Hot Schezuan. Other neighborhoods you have to order through bulletproof plexiglass. My area of queens, all the little take-out joints are being replaced by cheap, relatively authentic Thai joints, not Srip or Zabb quality, but still better then most. This is a trend that I bet will stretch accross NY.

So what's next? Korean or Vietnamese?

Anyway, I'm all about the Orange Chicken (white meat only, 1 dollar extra ok? yes)

― dan selzer, Monday, 11 February 2008 21:01 (seventeen years ago)

bulletproof plexiglass = the chinese place in my building. it is dirty as hell but pretty good (as long as there is plenty of sauce on everything so you dont taste the dirt)

― bell_labs, Monday, 11 February 2008 21:03 (seventeen years ago)

and $3 broccoli & bean curd (including rice in a big styrofoam container) weighs like 3 lbs

― bell_labs, Monday, 11 February 2008 21:05 (seventeen years ago)

but even better love the kind of middle class for jewish patrons sit-down american chinese places

otm. i said something like this on another thread -- if you want to find the quality american chinese food, follow the affluent jews. i went to a place like this in beverly hills two weeks ago (i had the salt and pepper shrimp) and it was some of the best inauthentic chinese food i've had in the l.a. metro area in the almost two years since i moved here. not that expensive either.

― get bent, Monday, 11 February 2008 21:06 (seventeen years ago)

so who wants to go to the all-you-can-eat hotpot place in flushing that sietsema reviewed a few weeks back?

― lauren, Monday, 11 February 2008 21:07 (seventeen years ago)

i do i do

― bell_labs, Monday, 11 February 2008 21:07 (seventeen years ago)

i can't be arsed to read this whole thread as i'm tired but wtf is "orange beef"? it sounds terrible.

― or something, Monday, 11 February 2008 21:08 (seventeen years ago)

haha i do too but i'm on another coast (xpost)

― get bent, Monday, 11 February 2008 21:08 (seventeen years ago)

yes. xp to lp

― ian, Monday, 11 February 2008 21:09 (seventeen years ago)

i really want to go. maybe this weekend? it's like $24.95 for 2hrs of gorging, and i think you can get dim sum for an extra $5 per person.

― lauren, Monday, 11 February 2008 21:09 (seventeen years ago)

It's an orange that's been marinated in beef and then boiled in beef broth

― nabisco, Monday, 11 February 2008 21:12 (seventeen years ago)

http://www.villagevoice.com/nyclife/0804,sietsema,78915,15.html

For an additional $3, Hot Pot City throws in unlimited dim sum and all the beer you can drink

― bell_labs, Monday, 11 February 2008 21:13 (seventeen years ago)

For an additional $3, Hot Pot City throws in unlimited dim sum and all the beer you can drink, which arrives in foamy pitchers and tastes like Bud.

holy shieeeeet. XPOST

― ian, Monday, 11 February 2008 21:14 (seventeen years ago)

haha, i was just about to post that.

― lauren, Monday, 11 February 2008 21:15 (seventeen years ago)

i think this is a must-do.

― lauren, Monday, 11 February 2008 21:15 (seventeen years ago)

yes. also paging: laurel
for the bud-like beer

― bell_labs, Monday, 11 February 2008 21:20 (seventeen years ago)

Brown rice is definitely an Americanization. My Dad's look of surprise when asked if he wants brown rice or white rice is classic.

― Spencer Chow, Monday, 11 February 2008 21:46 (seventeen years ago)

can I just say my favorite thing in the world is when somebody joins Chowhound who is clearly the owner of the establishment (or related), comes on, totally blasts the competition and makes ridiculous claims and thinks everyone's gonna figure they're just a random person. I mean, maybe if you join a board and pretend like you're part of the "community" for a while then start plugging away (The Lines on Acute Records coming in May!) but this cracks me up...Chowhound usually deletes these posts, shockingly this person has never posted before:

http://www.chowhound.com/topics/488658

Sebestianos Pizzeria Astoria NY
We just order from sebestianos pizzeria and this guy is a real Italian he make the best pizza.Me and my family and friends order their every week no one makes pizza like the owner who is italian american.His pizza is better than sac,dinos.I remeber one time I order from dinos I ordered a sicilan I got a round pie so we call back to find out what happen to my order the owner said he never makes mistakes well their pizza really sticks its no even made by an italian.Tast taste likes plastic thats why its so cheap to buy its all fake cheese.And cheap ing. Sebestianos has ways to order online accepts credit cards check out sebestianos online ordering at www.sebestianospizzeria.net or www.sebestianopizzeria.com

― dan selzer, Monday, 11 February 2008 22:50 (seventeen years ago)

:-D

― m coleman, Monday, 11 February 2008 23:38 (seventeen years ago)

cuban-chinese restaurants are classic (but I usually order from the "spanish food" column)

― m coleman, Monday, 11 February 2008 23:40 (seventeen years ago)

one year passes...

DUMPLINGS!

http://www.hot-screensaver.com/wp-myimages/soup-DUMPLINGS!.jpg

― Mr. Que, Tuesday, 11 August 2009 02:23 (sixteen years ago)

http://www.hot-screensaver.com/wp-myimages/soup-DUMPLINGS!.jpg

― Mr. Que, Tuesday, 11 August 2009 02:23 (sixteen years ago)

http://i27.tinypic.com/x4nfqf.jpg

looool

― PIN number at the ATM Machine (Z S), Tuesday, 11 August 2009 02:26 (sixteen years ago)

too bad--it's a great picture

― Mr. Que, Tuesday, 11 August 2009 02:28 (sixteen years ago)

three weeks pass...

you know what i hate? those damned shredded celery stalks that look like onions but always trick me with their foul cellulose flavor.

DUMPLINGS! otm.

― ian, Sunday, 6 September 2009 23:40 (sixteen years ago)

DUMPLINGS!?

― ian, Sunday, 6 September 2009 23:41 (sixteen years ago)

DUMPLINGS!DUMPLINGS!DUMPLINGS!

― ian, Sunday, 6 September 2009 23:42 (sixteen years ago)

I made some DUMPLINGS! for dinner.

DUMPLINGS!

― Internet! (Z S), Sunday, 6 September 2009 23:59 (sixteen years ago)

american chinese food = thisiswhyimfat.com

― strongohulkingtonsghost, Monday, 7 September 2009 00:06 (sixteen years ago)

i had rou jia mou the other day - basically chinese pulled pork sandwich. yum

― steener HOOStinov (s1ocki), Monday, 7 September 2009 00:56 (sixteen years ago)

xpost: yeah, it took me like a week to work off the damage done by a recent late-night drunk feast of General Tso's w/ side of DUMPLINGS!.

― Pullman/Paxton Revolving Bills (Pillbox), Monday, 7 September 2009 01:40 (sixteen years ago)

two months pass...

this local place has a "chinese menu" on their website for authentic non-"american chinese" dishes. some of the google translate results:

Crystal shoe
Lilac Floor
Palace of explosive Squid
Fried conch slice
Seafood Conference
Fried intestine
Dawn intestinal Wang
Sauerkraut intestine
Business was brisk Beef
Dry flat bitter gourd
3 soup
Fish head casserole two

― luol deng (am0n), Tuesday, 24 November 2009 20:42 (sixteen years ago)

Business was brisk Beef!!!!!

― mizzell, Tuesday, 24 November 2009 20:48 (sixteen years ago)

3 soup 4 the price of 1

― iiiijjjj, Tuesday, 24 November 2009 21:12 (sixteen years ago)

google translate is pretty lol in any language tbf

― ♪♫(●̲̲̅̅̅̅=̲̲̅̅̅̅●̲̅̅)♪♫ (Steve Shasta), Tuesday, 24 November 2009 21:17 (sixteen years ago)

http://www.google.com/search?hl=en&q=%22Dawn+intestinal+Wang%22

― luol deng (am0n), Tuesday, 24 November 2009 21:17 (sixteen years ago)

Dry flat bitter gourd

sounds delicious!

― figuratively, but in a very real way (amateurist), Tuesday, 24 November 2009 21:19 (sixteen years ago)

I just learned that crab rangoons were invented for the 1904 World's Fair in St Louis!! They are basically Midwestern, which makes me surprised they bothered to put scallions in them at all!!

― WHY DON'T YOU JUST LICK THE BUS DIRECTLY (Laurel), Tuesday, 24 November 2009 21:20 (sixteen years ago)

Business was brisk Beef

want

― harbl, Tuesday, 24 November 2009 21:35 (sixteen years ago)

Diminutive hot-dog eating champ Dawn "Intestinal" Wang

― Guayaquil (eephus!), Tuesday, 24 November 2009 21:38 (sixteen years ago)

three years pass...

http://www.wnyc.org/articles/wnyc-news/2013/jan/21/micropolis-mystery-chinese-double-menu/

― 乒乓, Wednesday, 23 January 2013 15:40 (twelve years ago)

i just came here to say DUMPLINGS!

― ^ sarcasm (ken c), Wednesday, 23 January 2013 15:54 (twelve years ago)

and lol at first post that may have had the examples wrong way round

― ^ sarcasm (ken c), Wednesday, 23 January 2013 15:56 (twelve years ago)

ten months pass...

http://www.amazon.com/Sunbeam-FPSBFCM40-Fortune-Cookie-Maker/dp/B007K98IWQ

Amazing

Think of the gag gift possibilities

― 乒乓, Friday, 13 December 2013 17:28 (twelve years ago)

this local place has a "chinese menu" on their website for authentic non-"american chinese" dishes. some of the google translate results:
Crystal shoe
Lilac Floor
Palace of explosive Squid
Fried conch slice
Seafood Conference
Fried intestine
Dawn intestinal Wang
Sauerkraut intestine
Business was brisk Beef
Dry flat bitter gourd
3 soup
Fish head casserole two
― luol deng (am0n), Tuesday, November 24, 2009 3:42 PM (4 years ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

hahahaha

― marcos, Friday, 13 December 2013 19:27 (twelve years ago)

Dawn intestinal Wang

Heck of a way to wake up

― Le passé, non seulement n'est pas fugace, il reste sur place (Michael White), Friday, 13 December 2013 21:32 (twelve years ago)

Seafood Conference is my favorite, can't say for sure why

― I was a teenage oenophile (rip van wanko), Friday, 13 December 2013 21:44 (twelve years ago)

Aww it's a Millennium Falcon that makes pizzelles!

― Tottenham Heelspur (in orbit), Friday, 13 December 2013 21:47 (twelve years ago)

three years pass...

Okay I just had dry-wok (vegetarian) chicken (干锅素鷄) and it's crazy full of sichuan peppercorns so my mouth is all tingly. If you go to a place that makes it TRY THAT SHIT, it's good. Lotus root, bamboo shoots, snow peas, mushrooms, all that.

― rudy githyanki (GOTT PUNCH II HAWKWINDZ), Sunday, 18 December 2016 11:13 (nine years ago)

― 龜, Sunday, 18 December 2016 13:44 (nine years ago)

THAT'S EXACTLY WHAT I LOOKED LIKE AFTER I ATE IT

― rudy githyanki (GOTT PUNCH II HAWKWINDZ), Monday, 19 December 2016 07:59 (nine years ago)

sichuan peppercorns are magical

― global tetrahedron, Monday, 19 December 2016 16:31 (nine years ago)

lived in china for a year and i'd honestly say a round trip flight would be worth it for the food alone. that said, this thread kind of makes me want to get leeann chin for lunch

― global tetrahedron, Monday, 19 December 2016 16:40 (nine years ago)

Someone from my school was recognized by a community organization on Friday and the awards dinner was at a local Chinese banquet hall and her biggest complaint was that THE FOOD WOULD BE GROSS AND MOVING AND HAVE EYES. This person is born and raised in Brooklyn--not, as you might think, Collyer, KS, population 109.

― If authoritarianism is Romania's ironing board, then (in orbit), Monday, 19 December 2016 16:49 (nine years ago)

Jeeeeeeeeeesus.

― rudy githyanki (GOTT PUNCH II HAWKWINDZ), Monday, 19 December 2016 19:21 (nine years ago)

one month passes...

we got a hot pot and it is the GREATEST LEFTOVER MACHINE EVER* seriously the microwave is strictly for popcorn now I think

*as long as you don't mind scrubbing the burnt bits out of the bottom etc

― El Tomboto, Tuesday, 31 January 2017 01:01 (eight years ago)

My Dad has always added plum sauce to barbecue sauce for his ribs.

― Spencer Chow, Tuesday, 31 January 2017 18:23 (eight years ago)

what do you mean? xp

― 龜, Tuesday, 31 January 2017 18:29 (eight years ago)

I think I know what tombot means but it's funnier if I picture him throwing random leftovers in a hot pot

― mh 😏, Tuesday, 31 January 2017 19:40 (eight years ago)

raindrops
hot pots

― na (NA), Tuesday, 31 January 2017 19:43 (eight years ago)

picture him throwing random leftovers in a hot pot

yes, picture that

― El Tomboto, Tuesday, 31 January 2017 20:08 (eight years ago)

like taco bell

― mh 😏, Tuesday, 31 January 2017 20:08 (eight years ago)

yeah i literally are imaging him throwing some leftovers tacos into a hot pot

― Islamic State of Mind (jim in vancouver), Tuesday, 31 January 2017 20:10 (eight years ago)

wow im illiterate

― Islamic State of Mind (jim in vancouver), Tuesday, 31 January 2017 20:11 (eight years ago)

^^^ LOL! I could kinda eat American Chinese food every day for lunch, and often do. I stay away from deep fried stuff like General Tso's, and mostly do tofu or chicken w/ veggies, and spicy green beans. My local place will sub brown rice at no extra charge. And once a week they have a special curry.

― Fake posts from a failing poster (Dan Peterson), Tuesday, 31 January 2017 20:13 (eight years ago)

yeah home hot pots are the shit

taiwanese food > chinese food btw *ducks*

― k3vin k., Tuesday, 31 January 2017 20:14 (eight years ago)

yes, picture that

― El Tomboto, Tuesday, January 31, 2017 3:08 PM (twenty-one minutes ago) Bookmark

you mean like an induction cooker?

― 龜, Tuesday, 31 January 2017 20:30 (eight years ago)

? bro you know what a hot pot is

― k3vin k., Tuesday, 31 January 2017 20:31 (eight years ago)

i guess hot pots are induction cookers? not an appliance nerd

― k3vin k., Tuesday, 31 January 2017 20:33 (eight years ago)

anyway i also had a hot pot and it was a great investment. my ex-gf kept it when we broke up :/

― k3vin k., Tuesday, 31 January 2017 20:34 (eight years ago)

http://www.seriouseats.com/recipes/2011/10/popeye-tsos-chicken-general-tsos-chicken-made-with-popeyes-chicken-nuggets-recipe.html

I WANT TO BELIEVE

― mh 😏, Tuesday, 31 January 2017 20:39 (eight years ago)

? bro you know what a hot pot is
― k3vin k., Tuesday, January 31, 2017 3:31 PM (two hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink
i guess hot pots are induction cookers? not an appliance nerd
― k3vin k., Tuesday, January 31, 2017 3:33 PM (two hours ago) Bookmark

i guess one appliance you do own is a self-clowning oven

― 龜, Tuesday, 31 January 2017 22:50 (eight years ago)

i still have no idea what appliance yr talking about

― just sayin, Wednesday, 1 February 2017 02:14 (eight years ago)

cooking up tacos in the hot hot pot

― mh 😏, Wednesday, 1 February 2017 02:34 (eight years ago)

guys seriously
basically I'm talking about a ceramic pot with a lid and the lid has a little hole in it to let out steam
you chuck some rice in there and some water and make the rice
then you chuck all the veg and protein or whatever (random leftovers!) and some vinegar and hot sauce and you know, stuff
then let it cook for a while. add more hot sauce whenever you feel like it though
after that you eat it and it's delicious

― El Tomboto, Wednesday, 1 February 2017 02:40 (eight years ago)

from what I hear this is basically exactly how they feed sumo wrestlers, so it seems healthy too

― El Tomboto, Wednesday, 1 February 2017 02:41 (eight years ago)

That sounds like a rice cooker?

― Jersey Al (Albert R. Broccoli), Wednesday, 1 February 2017 03:18 (eight years ago)

oh... its a japanese thing

― just sayin, Wednesday, 1 February 2017 03:28 (eight years ago)

tombot that sounds like claypot rice, not hot pot

https://i.imgur.com/ewMQPps.jpg

― 龜, Wednesday, 1 February 2017 14:34 (eight years ago)

I admit I am not quite able to picture the 'bot's setup. Image, please? Does ceramic thingie go directly on burner? Electric or gas or ???

― mom tossed in kimchee (quincie), Wednesday, 1 February 2017 18:31 (eight years ago)

I can't remember if I posted about it already but I got a carbon-steel wok and seasoning it was a v. satisfying process and it is nice to cook with. Still can't get that awesome restaurant flavor, though. Maybe when the weather gets nice I'll try wokking outside over some sort of propane flame-thrower setup.

― mom tossed in kimchee (quincie), Wednesday, 1 February 2017 18:33 (eight years ago)

tomboto

ya i have that

it's a type of hot pot

use it to make nabe, but you can make all sorts of stuff with it: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nabemono

good during winter and i put mine on a portable stove burner

my setup looks like this

http://www.gunmajet.net/wp-content/uploads/2011/04/IMG_6824.jpg

― F♯ A♯ (∞), Wednesday, 1 February 2017 19:26 (eight years ago)

the pot itself i just call it a nabe pot (donabe) btw (bought it at mitsuwa)

― F♯ A♯ (∞), Wednesday, 1 February 2017 19:30 (eight years ago)

yes, ceramic pot, goes directly on burner

tonight I threw in the last bit of January's chili batch, leftover roast chicken from super bowl dinner out, and some rice

burning my mouth like crazy with amazing combination of temperature and capsaicin

thanks again new kitchen guy

― El Tomboto, Tuesday, 7 February 2017 01:14 (eight years ago)

I made szechuan chicken with udon noodles tonight. I'm Pan-Asian!

― scott seward, Tuesday, 7 February 2017 02:56 (eight years ago)

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