Moms on the internet : C/D?

yeah...my mom doesnt even use uppercase in emails & texts w/ sensible but cool abbreviations... C: my mom D: yours

she also hasn't grasped the whole concept of "instant messaging" and proceeds to (poorly) type out entire paragraphs before hitting send. it's kind of cute, which means i will be annoyed with it before long, i'm afraid.

My mom writes emails as single paragraphs all in lower case.

i.e. dud

I think it's totally awesome. Well, it's only awesome after you've suffered through reading one of their poorly spelled emails with excessive exclamation marks. I usually think, "Awwh, bless her heart. She's trying to be hip and 'with it!'"

I think I'm also just terrified that that will be me one day.

My mom has sent me one e-mail in her life and I think she felt it was one too many. She much prefers regular letters, which I get and v. much enjoy. She is aware of my Myspace/Flickr/blog sites, though. (Sent a nice comment the other week on my cartography post.)

i noticed your mum uses the extended dash when she could probably just start a new sentence -- is this a mum thing? my mum does it all the time. also she is an atrocious speller, which i somehow got through the first 22 years of my life without realising

If I understand the process properly, your sassy, trendy, with-it hipness will one day fall behind the couch and mummify, so that in another generation you will appear hopelessly quaint to the usurping youth of our great nation. IOW, cute, but a bit cringeworthy. It is a natural process.

I misread this thread as 'Momus on the internet'. Anyway, carry on.

lol me too

My mom just started sending email like a year ago. At first she used all caps because it was "easier to see" but she's gotten over that.

Some excerpts:

WE HAVE TRIED TO TAKE INTO ACCOUNT THE TRAVEL AND PACKING FACTOR FOR YOU.HOPE THIS HELPS YOU. DID YOU BOOK A FLIGHT I CANT FIND THE QUESTION MARK LOVE MOM
----------------
I HATE HATE HATE WINDOWS!!! I JUST WROTE HELEN A LONG E MAIL AND IT JUST SAT THERE AFTER I HIT SENT. #%$&!!! THOSE ARE SWEARS. DAD DIDNT KNOW JWHAT HAPPENED SO I HAD TO START OVER AGAIN. OKH WELL.
----------------
HI GUYS, HAPPY HALLOWEEN. IT IS REALLY MORE OF A TRICK THAN A TREAT FOR ME TO E-MAIL BECAUSE MY TYPING SUCKS.

legit a++ post

I'm sure my kids cringe ever time they get an email or a text from me, much as I cringe when I get my daily (r)email from my mom. She is pretty internet savvy, for a 70-something, and does send me a real email at least once a week, but I doubt we'll ever get her going on chat.

Mr. Jaq's mom just got one of those special super-simplified cell phones for old people, because her other one was "too complicated" (i.e. the most basic one in the normal market). She was convinced a power outage during a storm had messed up her cable and was v. irritated that she couldn't watch the Mariners a few weeks ago. I took a look at things and found the batteries in her remote had died and that was all.

DID YOU BOOK A FLIGHT I CANT FIND THE QUESTION MARK LOVE MOM

#%$&!!! THOSE ARE SWEARS

add to faq

Every email my mum sends, the subject line is "mum". As if I cant tell its from her FROM THE SENDER.

"Mum"'s the word.

Honestly, what's with the all caps thing? I doubt anybody who does it is touch typing, but don't they see it before it's sent, and do they think "That's pretty easy to read"?

I misread this thread as 'Momus on the internet'. Anyway, carry on.

roffle me too.

If it wasn't for email (and skype and yousendit which enables me to send mpegs) I don't think I'd survive. I still remember a couple of years ago, she was only able to call (with a reg phone) and fax. They live in Japan and I'm stuck here in Belgium. So internet is GREBT. We email, chat and skype on a daily basis. In fact I think we communicate far more than yr average mother/daughter. That said, she's against all types of "social communities" as she considers it a waste of time. True dat but, uh, mom, don't change your mind or you might discover how much I waste my (and your) time on the net.

MY MOM HAS NOT DISCOVERED ABOUT CAPS LOCK EITHER. HOWEVER MY SIMILARLY HANDICAPPED SISTER SELF-REGULATED AFTER BEING TOLD HER MAILS LOOKED LIKE SHOUTING.

DID YOU BOOK A FLIGHT I CANT FIND THE QUESTION MARK LOVE MOM

#%$&!!! THOSE ARE SWEARS

add to faq

-- BIG HOOS aka the steendriver, Friday, 5 October 2007 03:33 (6 hours ago)

BIG HOOS OTM

My mum does the "whole paragraphs on IM before hitting return" thing, even though I make a point of breaking up my replies to her in the hope she'll catch on. She's otherwise pretty good about it*, and since she lives abroad, it helps us keep in touch. My dad, on the other hand, just stands back and lets my mum do everything, like "can you look up the football scores for me" even though he knows perfectly well how to do it, I think it's a fear/age thing because he doesn't think 75 year old men should be on the internets.

* unlike the first time I showed her something on the internet, and she asked if she would be able to access that from "my internet in Spain"...to be fair this was a while ago.

My mums text messages are a thing of joy and my dad despite being in telecoms is always calling me by mistake with his unlocked phone in his pocket.

your mums are all better than mine. she just learnt to text last year. still hasn't learnt to turn on the computer yet.

When my mom got tanked at Margaritaville (yes, Jimmy Buffett) in New Orleans, she sent me a string of drunken test messages telling me of booze-fueled escapades. I wish that phone hadn't died because they were comedy gold.

My Mum has never, to my knowledge, been on the Internet. I don't blame her.

I'm stuck here in Belgium

Ohh, Belgium's nice!

My mum is just taking tentative steps online - banking, emails, etc. But I noticed that she had circled a piece in her SAGA mag about a chat room for gardeners. I guess that's the difference between us, I'd just go and have a look at the forum she, makes a note about it and might look it up later if she's got time. She is more sensible than me.

Stray comma.

My parents are very computer-savvy, but my dad (homepage: slashdot, occupation: involves doing a lot of programming, which he taught himself, and hiring younger programmers) referred to instant messenger in phone terminology a couple years ago: "so and so called on the computer but you weren't there so i told her so and hung up," which was cute.

I shouldnt post this out of context cos it sounds so bad, but hahahha:

Blow ups can be ok - is Rob sleeping in his own bed or yours he
!!!!!!hee!!!!!

Geez mum.

(she was talking about blow up BEDS you pervs)

My dad emails a little - he immediately deletes everything from his inbox after he's read it, still don't understand why he does that - it's his excuse when asked why he never answers ("I don't have it anymore!"), my mom surfs a little. Tried to show them more but they don't have the patience.

Or so I thought.

Couple of weeks ago, I started up their PC because there was something wrong with their antivirus. I clicked on the History button by accident since they use IE and I'm used to Firefox and they apparently surf to news and weather sites and they also check on me (I'm 35, FFS) (I received a promo postcard at their address for The Threshold HouseBoys Choir project by Coil's Peter Christopherson in April. Five months later, someone surfed to the URL on that card on my parents' PC, LOL - they must have written it down, I guess. Can't complain about that, it only confirms my reasons for telling them as little as possible about my life: no matter what I say, they're going to worry about it. "do you still see Sarah?" "Who?" "Didn't you go to a concert with her?" "Mom, that was six years ago. I'm single and I'm not gay and I'm not panicking, let it go FFS." (teary crap about me being lonely and sad and so on, even though I couldn't be happier with living on my own - but she lies awake at night all the time worrying that I'm going to die alone and stuff, apparently. Telling her she worries too much = very bad and ungrateful, I tried this already.) ).

Also, dad likes sites about big boobs. :-/

I don't officially know this, obviously.

Why the f* did I type all of this? I'm making myself feel bad now, and it's almost weekend here :-/

Yeah, never look at your dad's internets history.

My mom just learned how to use the chat function on Gmail.

Is it too late for me to wheel out the "mmmmm.......what is she wearing?" joke?

Thought so.

Yeah, never look at your dad's internets history.

-- aldo, Friday, 5 October 2007 12:35 (30 minutes ago) Bookmark Link

Or their bedside cabinet drawer. Shudders.

my mom forwards hoaxes (the postal service is gonna start charging us for e-mail!) and political things (george bush is a jerkface!) :-/

Is it too late for me to wheel out the "mmmmm.......what is she wearing?" joke?

Thought so.

Coincidentally, she was a little wary when I introduced her to this web 2.0 cooking and recipe site (which has a low-grade social networking system). When people would add her as a friend, she'd call me up and ask: "Who are these people!? I don't know them! Are they perverts?"

I was hoping this thread would have something as good as strongo's mom's R&B crit or the schef's mom's pet psychic stories :(

Still early days, may happen yet.

You made me LOL!!!!

I will BRB!!!!!

My mom calls me to be reassured that the spam emails warning you that someone has hijacked your ebay account are STILL SPAM before she deletes them.

Ethan,thanx for corn & war articles.I hate corn & war.As for corn I have
been reading labels for a few yrs & not buying products with corn
syrup.After reading this info I will now try to avoid buying all corn
containing products.

As for war,that is much more complicated.Joseph Campbell wrote abt the
feeling of bliss & calm that was reported by those viewing destuction during
WWII.I just bought a rumi pb from goodwill.In the intro Barks says abt these
poems,"Like grief,they flip normal,rational perspective to sudden mystery
and clarity."

Been on net for a while .Really have flu ---achy,spacy ,chilled to
bone,fragile feeling.Going back to bed.
Love,Mom

momus on the internet : C/D?

Yesterday I had a really awkward chat with some 49-year-old mom while playing Literati on Yahoo! games. It got really sexual, she started calling me "young pup", and when I came back from my trip to the kitchen to get coffee, she said she missed me. The situation was exacerbated by the fact that the only words I could manage to make included "humps", "rising", and in one excruciating turn, "bulged".

Moms on the internet: DUD

and what's mom = roxor

momus on the internet : C/D?

exactly what i read.

my mom is on facebook. she posts on my wall:

MOM (Trenton / Princeton, NJ) wrote
at 5:54pm on September 27th, 2007
Do your friends know about that time when you were a baby and Dad dropped you on your head on the driveway? Not on purpose, I don't think.
Wall-to-Wall - Write on Hilary's Wall - Message - Delete

MOM (Trenton / Princeton, NJ) wrote
at 5:51pm on September 27th, 2007
wow. I just spent about half an hour reading all your old messages. A lot of it was too deep for me to understand, but really, I mean, god, I feel, well, just so much SMARTER now. Who knew that this is where the brain trust meets?
Wall-to-Wall - Write on Hilary's Wall - Message - Delete

I might have disguised the 'write on ---'s wall' part too.

i noticed your mum uses the extended dash when she could probably just start a new sentence -- is this a mum thing? my mum does it all the time. also she is an atrocious speller, which i somehow got through the first 22 years of my life without realising

-- webber, Friday, 5 October 2007 03:11 (11 hours ago) Link

weird, my mom does this too. the paragraphs in her emails are each one big sentence with dashes. she's very good at grammar and spelling in general.

is Rob sleeping in his own bed or yours he
!!!!!!hee!!!!!

^lol

yeah, what is with the hyphens?

the paragraphs in her emails are each one big sentence with dashes. she's very good at grammar and spelling in general.

so OTM with my mom, it hurts.

por ejemplo:

Pinch me --I am going to the ocean in OCT. for 3 days----we have a hotel right on the beach!!!!!!!!!! I am getting so excited!!! Our flight is at 6:15 am--ouch!!!

Molly, that's really cute! (re: thread-opener)

There's some more good stuff here:

this iz the thread where we all post like r momz

My grandma doesn't like to use pronouns in her emails, as well as written correspondence.

Example:

"Went to pharmacy with Brad to pick up pain medication. Haven't been feeling well this week. Hope to recover in time for birthday party on Sunday."

film at eleven

That is impressive that she even uses email.

My grandma still hasn't mastered the answering machine:

"Gramma F called.... Gramma F. #867-5309. Gramma F." *click*

my mom forwards hoaxes (the postal service is gonna start charging us for e-mail!) and political things (george bush is a jerkface!) :-/

My mom calls me to be reassured that the spam emails warning you that someone has hijacked your ebay account are STILL SPAM before she deletes them.

Mine too.

Oh mom. Why? WHY?

My mom sent out a huge email to her entire address book, apologizing for using bcc's. I'm still unclear what the problem was, but I think some of the recipients decided her message was a horrible virus, because it showed up w/o their email address in the TO field.

molly your gramma is jenny?!

she totally is!

My mom writes HANDWRITTEN letters in an amateur email style. (it is v, enderaing, don't get me wrong). Her last one was something like:

Abb13 hello it is mom. I think I broke my leg working on the house at least I didn't have to see the house from your favorite show. I am sending you this comic strip I cut out of the paper four years ago but I forgot to send it so here it is I am sending it love mom.

http://6.content.collegehumor.com/d1/ch6/1/5/collegehumor.c5482b016cfb5625ab4408458c8461ae.jpg

LOL

Hahah yeah that was kinda cute. Totally my mother.

Oh, it's from collegehumor.com

You're in this video

Inbox X

Mom
to me

show details 11:13 AM (3 minutes ago)


Reply

Hey, looks like you're in this video. Crazy. Check it out:

www.cnnbcvideo.com/index.html?nid=OyaDQytMr6bF5iS96yPeuTE5NTcyNg--&referred_by=5645851-x7PnTXx

Don't worry, this isn't spam or a virus. I'm just sending it through the CNNBC website.

– Mom

unlinkified

wait this is even funnier -- load the link!!!

http://www.cnnbcvideo.com/index.html?nid=OyaDQytMr6bF5iS96yPeuTE5NTcyNg--&referred_by=5645851-x7PnTXx

Jonathan=loser

what a cocksuck.

all of my wife's family friends (ie: not people she is friends with in real life) have found her on facebook. I said this is like an invasion of privacy. thank god no-one from my family knows how to use a computer, apparently.

College students are notorious for staying out late, sleeping in, and leaving piles of dirty towels on the bathroom floor. Parents are notorious for thinking college kids should act like adults, but still have a curfew.

Eventually, it becomes a problem.

The fact is, you both have to grin and bear some things. Parents, you're not going to re-set your college kid's clock. She's up late, she sleeps late, that's the way it goes. Students, your parents are wired to worry about you. Respect that, and agree to some kind of curfew or calling system.

And parents, about those dirty towels? Don't fight it and don't bother washing — just smile, re-fold and put them back in the linen closet. (A sense of humor goes a long way over a month's break!)

http://blog.wellsfargo.com/StudentLoanDown/images/staci.jpg

I love to give. A Leo Click here to learn about third-party website links by birth, I've always been a generous soul. So throughout the year I listen for cues from my family and friends about their wants and interests, find the perfect gifts, wrap them beautifully, and enjoy everyone's reactions at opening time.

Usually, I go a little, well, overboard.

http://blog.wellsfargo.com/StudentLoanDown/images/barbara.jpg
I've got to be honest with you: I don't really give gifts. Sure, I generally find something for my niece and nephews and do help Santa fill my sister's stocking with some practical items she needs (think socks and Chapstick®). Click here to learn about third-party website links But that concludes my shopping list. In our family, Christmas isn't a huge gift-giving ordeal.

For me, the holidays are much more about experiences rather than things. I'd much rather spend my time watching my father cry at It's A Wonderful Life Click here to learn about third-party website links,all the while claiming he just has a cold (his excuse every year), than watch him open a gift that I stressed out to find and that won't last like the memories will. Cliché as it is, it's more about presence than presents. (Yeah, I'm groaning, too.)

Moms on the internet are a menace. What is to be done about this?

http://blog.wellsfargo.com/StudentLoanDown/images/rachel.jpg
In college, my four roommates and I would put on a movie — one we'd all seen hundreds of times — and work away on papers and flashcards, only pausing every now and then to throw out a line like, "You must chill! You must chill!" Click here to learn about third-party website links, "I carried a watermelon" Click here to learn about third-party website links or "Aspen! Mmmm California. Beautiful." Click here to learn about third-party website links

Recently, my dad called me to discuss this very topic. One of his employees was listening to the radio at his desk. My dad asked him to turn it off and told him that music in the workplace is inappropriate.

I told my dad he should stop asking the reverend from Footloose Click here to learn about third-party website links for business advice!

http://blog.wellsfargo.com/StudentLoanDown/images/barbara.jpg
One of the first things I bought as a college freshman was a USD hoodie from the campus bookstore Click here to learn about third-party website links. And I pretty much lived in it for the following four years. OK, not completely true, but be sure that T-shirts, sweatshirts, and jeans were staples in my collegiate wardrobe Click here to learn about third-party website links.

I allocated very little of my budget during college to clothing. When I did get new clothes, it was for a specific event, and, generally, my mother let me use one of her store credit cards to purchase the clothes. Thanks, Mom!

http://blog.wellsfargo.com/StudentLoanDown/images/staci.jpg
These days you can't open a newspaper, click on an online news site, or turn on the television without being bombarded by reports on the state of the economy. I'm not sure if it's as bad as the news reports make it out to be (is it?), but I've gotten to the point where I have to tune it out. If I don't, I start to panic.

Earlier this week, I was chatting with a co-worker who is about to send his eldest daughter off to college in Minnesota. He'd found a carpet remnant for her dorm room at a home improvement store for a song — but it took some convincing before his daughter agreed to it. Ultimately she, like many college freshmen, knows that beggars can't be choosers!

http://blog.wellsfargo.com/StudentLoanDown/images/karen.jpg
A funny story comes to mind about my son when he was about 5 years old. He assumed that since Mommy works at a bank, she can just get money out anytime she wants. Oh, if it were only that simple.

Fast forward about 7 years to the future – now he thinks that a credit card is the simple solution to anything we could ever want.

"Why, he asked me very innocently, "can't we get a Wii?"

http://blog.wellsfargo.com/StudentLoanDown/images/ryansmile.jpg

http://blog.wellsfargo.com/StudentLoanDown/images/dinna.jpg
What was our big summer trip this year? We didn't go Costa Maya, Costa Brava Click here to learn about third-party website links, or Costa Rica — but it sure did "costa lotta!" Sorry, couldn't resist the pun.

no well how could you

tell me about third-party website links

I just did some photoshopping on that kid's award-winning negotiation smile but he's just an innocent whose mom is talking about him on the internet so I don't think I'll post it.

I actually gasped in laughter at that costa lotta.

http://blog.wellsfargo.com/StudentLoanDown/images/staci.jpg

I was a latecomer to the senior portrait party. Two months into the school year, I still hadn't had them taken. My father owned an advertising agency and suggested that one of his staff photographers take mine. "It's just a yearbook picture," he reasoned.

There was no reasoning with 17-year-old me: impetuous and hormonal and on the cusp of adulthood. I didn't want a photographer with a different point of view to document the end of my high school days/the beginning of the rest of my life. I wanted photos that looked just like everyone else's.

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|

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http://blog.wellsfargo.com/StudentLoanDown/images/Staci_senior_portrait.jpg

http://blog.wellsfargo.com/StudentLoanDown/images/caroline.jpg

I've always liked feeling financially independent. I had a paper route as a kid and relished having my own money for movies, candy and Ms. Pac-Man. I worked as a grocery checker in high school, spending my cash on clothes and other extras I wanted for myself.

But I distinctly remember the day I felt truly financially independent. I was 29 years old and had just purchased my first car without consulting my parents in any way, shape or form. Finding that little Mazda all on my own and securing the financing was a little scary, but it felt great. I'd crossed that final bridge to true financial independence. Light the sparklers!

http://blog.wellsfargo.com/StudentLoanDown/images/barbara.jpg
My home search has taken a toll on me and the ‘rents. I'm trying to be independent and grown up. They're trying to make sure nothing happens to their baby girl. We've been clashing a little bit in the form of some heated discussions:

Dad (protectively): Aren't you rushing into this a little? This is a big commitment. Are you sure you know what you're doing?

Me (sarcastically): No I haven't researched at all; I'm going into this completely blind. Why can't you trust that I'm able to be an adult?

You get the picture …

http://blog.wellsfargo.com/StudentLoanDown/images/RachelMakingBread.jpg

http://blog.wellsfargo.com/StudentLoanDown/images/barbara.jpg
Business or pleasure? Well, recently I was able to answer the former rather than the latter while traveling. The end of February brought my first big-girl business trip with Wells Fargo – to San Francisco Click here to learn about third-party website links! I attended a writing conference Click here to learn about third-party website links and then met with the fabulous people who work behind the scenes of this blog (excuse me while I rub the brown off my nose).

Even though I was there on business, I also found some time for pleasure – shopping Click here to learn about third-party website links, visiting museums Click here to learn about third-party website links, and seeing the San Francisco ballet perform Sleeping Beauty Click here to learn about third-party website links. Amazing.

Plus, I played a fun game called “Try to look like you belong here.” It’s something I do whenever I’m in a big city – you know, to blend in Click here to learn about third-party website links. Personally, my winning strategy includes not looking up at tall buildings, avoiding cameras and maps, and walking as fast as I can.

Until I get lost.

Now for some fun, read this:

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/family/familycolumnists/3357163/Dulwich-Mum.html

My mom just sent an email with the subject heading of
mom

I laughed so hard and my husband being like 'why is that funny?' just made me laugh harder.

I hope it was all written in the third person

MOM ANGRY, MOM SMASH

ok apparently the only subject heading my mom ever uses is:
mom

it still kills me every time!

With my Mum the subject heading is usually FROM MUM. Occasionally it'll be MUM CALLING!

from: mom (m✧✧@hotm✧✧✧.m✧✧)
subj: mom

mom abbott,
How mom you? mom are mom. did you mom the moms I mommed? I mom you are momming mom.

mom truly,
Mom

lollll hotmail.mom

om mom mom mom

my mother still can't figure out the internet or email. this is also a woman who still thinks my voicemail is an answering machine i get messages like "chris its ma, are you there, pick up? hello? are you sleeping its me, pick up?"

okay lolllllllll

also i am glad that my hotmail.mom joke made it thru the internets in one piece

My mom is expanding her subject-writing skills. Her last email was called "mom on birds."

i got your email about the birds and then i came across this on a blog and thought how cute it was, and then i wondered had that email i had looked ant earlier in the day influenced me with its bird propaganda, how do you do that, with that kind of influence you could rule the world, (it might need to be a bit more subtle), but never the less it did work.

http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_Q5bnwoYIyaQ/TTXkeoK1DdI/AAAAAAAAJ68/K2RZ1sCv7dI/s1600/1.JPG

I sent her a link to the "Put a Bird On It" video.

ugh i wish my mam understood the internet. she teaches special needs kids and she was planning a project for learning about different countries around the world, just a little information, some facts and images. She asked me *to visit the embassies in london* to get information for this project.

That is rich! Seriously, I did too many sit-ups and the lols made my abdomen hurt again.

She spends half the time yelling at me asking how to spell something correctly. LEARN TO SPELL CHECK!

i love my mom, but she forwards me the corniest joeks via email. she always starts with, "danny, i thought you'd like this. there's some truth to it. . ."

and then: lamest joek ever (other than the one's i tell).

Momus on the internet : C/D?

My mom now sends out emails to warn us that she is going to send us an email with an attachment, "so you'll know it's safe to open it".

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yGLO-2w7e1M&feature=player_embedded

thanks to http://www.momspam.net/

this week i received racist bin laden-related spam from my mum ;(

ok apparently the only subject heading my mom ever uses is:
mom

it still kills me every time!

― Stop Non-Erotic Cabaret (Abbbottt)

Hahah I get this too! All my emails from my mum just say "mum" in the subject header. As if I wouldn't know who it was otherwise :/

She told me when she writes people who aren't her kids, she uses her first name as the subject heading.

I get 'Dalry Calling' in my subject headers like some sort of BBC announcer circa 1954 (Dalry is my hometown)

the thought of my mother being an internet user and contributing to FAcebook and the like used to scare me.

Not so much after Facebook rolled out the privacy settings for status updates last year -- now she only sees what I want her to.

My mom always writes "Yomama on (day of the week that she is writing to me)". I asked her once why she does this, and she told me it's so I know what day of the week it was when she wrote the email.

my mom scolded me for making fun of Christopher Cross on FB the other day

my mom got a FB invite from a former co-worker who had been fired for incompetence/laziness. It reaffirmed her belief that she didn't understand the point of social networking.

my mom and dad both have facebooks, don't know how to use them.

my mom and dad both have iphones, don't know how to use them. (my dad sent me a text a few weeks ago, tho: "This is my first (and probably only) text to you from my new phone. love, dad.")

my mom sends emails all the time, though. luckily, she stopped sending jokes and cute pictures of animals to me a few years ago. the other day, she sent me one that went like this:

Hi Table,

I just had a revelation: lyrics to Hallelujah are amazing.

Hope you are well.

Many thanks for gamelon info. The musician who played in our class used a portable gamelon plus hand drum plus flute for a new world music kind of effect.

Miss you,
Mom

(the gamelan refs are there because she asked me for gamelan music for her yoga class)

things my mom emails me about:

stocks in my IRA account
my parents' cats
car maintenance
whether I'm eating healthy food
people from my hometown that I don't give a shit about

I am just thankful my mom only uses the internet to surf occasionally and never uses social media. She has sent me maybe five emails in my life. However there have been a couple of shitstorms because she's been looking at my sister's FB page and taken issue with something seen on mine. Luckily my sister's FB page is mega-boring and mostly feed-blocked due to her love of online slot machine games etc.

My mom says the reason she doesn't have a facebook account is she is afraid no one would be friends with her.

I've always been afraid that someone would either jokingly poke fun at me on FB or say something nasty to me and my mom would write a really angry, ferocious FB message to them telling them to leave me alone.

my parents do the "people from my hometown i don't give a shit about" thing with me over the phone, mostly. i'm always like, 'yeah, uh-huh,' and steer the conversation elsewhere. i mean, do you really think i care about the parents of a kid i was friends with in 8th grade and haven't seen in almost twelve years?

yeah, the only ones I care about are the ones with sordid stories: like the guy who divorced his wife after she got breast implants and he caught her fucking the neighbor, or the guy who had a drug/drinking/gambling problem who o.d.ed at the family cabin, the former cheerleader who stabbed her husband, and the former football quarterback who was the football coach at the high school the next town over who was having sex with one of his students around the corner from the Mailboxes Etc. on Main St.

My mom has lived on the same street since she was five. Nothing that happens in my town escapes her attention/censure/whatever. If there is anything you need to know about local events, she's got HOURS of opinion and gossip - and I would much rather listen to those stories than hear all about how much 'everybody' hates Barack Obama and/or that FOX is fair and balanced.

^^^ town gossip always a welcome distraction

my parents do the "people from my hometown i don't give a shit about" thing with me over the phone, mostly. i'm always like, 'yeah, uh-huh,' and steer the conversation elsewhere. i mean, do you really think i care about the parents of a kid i was friends with in 8th grade and haven't seen in almost twelve years?

Yeah I get this all the time. "Oh I bumped into mrs Flan yesterday, you remember her daughter Peach right?" "mum, what? No" "she was 3 years below you in school, you must remember her"

WHY WOULD I REMEMBER ANYONE WHO WASNT EVEN IN MY YEAR o_0

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d8x_P1DQ0r0&feature=related

bet this youtube name is the result of a mom on the internet

mom sent me a pic of Lemmy last week with a note saying "do you know this guy? I wanna meet him. -mom" p classic

subject: mom

i was watching the cbs morning dribble, and they had a writer named Molcolm Gladwell on, just curious if you have read any of his stuff, seemed interesting

subject: mom

still so amazing
that's such a nice email

suggest despite all my rage I am still just Molcolm Gladwell d/n

Molcolm Gladwell – The Tipping Paint

love "cbs morning dribble"
so otm

my friends call me molc

mox

10,000 Hors

Still get subject: mum from my mum as well, after all these years.

"everything's always about you"

http://i.imgur.com/3s30x.jpg

LOL ilxors <3

my mom ended her last email with

i hope things are going well for you, love mom :) ! do you think these expression things could ever become part of real punctuation?

some people really use them like they are punctuation

ugh, moms on facebook:

You know your son has crossed another threshold when he and his wife choose their new apartment, because the neighborhood is safe and the schools terrific, even though it is not fun and hip like the place they live now.

STFU mom. You complained about moving to where I grew up for like 15 years.

sounds like she didn't much like that threshold

always so condescending, she was

good thing you found a neighborhood where you can condescend to your children

FWIW she tried to convince me to stay in my current neighborhood. Which I don't even like that much and is too expensive.

maybe she was trying to vicariously live out her dreams through you

My mom didn't like it when I lived in a "fun" and "hip" neighborhood. It was like "please come home" all of the time. I mean, there was more crime in that "hip" neighborhood than there is in the "ghetto" where she lives.

God I remember at Rutgers I moved to this totally-safe neighborhood that was like 3 blocks from one of the nicer more isolated campuses and she was all STEVE I DON'T LIKE THIS NEIGHBORHOOD!! when I was moving some stuff in why bcz some of the houses on the street had overgrowth and also there was a Mexican woman pushing a baby stroller down the sidewalk.

facebook blurbs are like telephone voices, wholly contrived personae that render a person temporarily unreal

Well my mom's not as bad as the friend who responded "Don't you love it when they finally grow up?"

DIAF boomer trash

DIAF boomer trash <-- catchphrase for our generation

word

facebook blurbs are like telephone voices, wholly contrived personae that render a person temporarily unreal

Digging this

My mom finally sent me an email with a subject other than
mom

It was:

:0 mom?

hahaha

My mom just described almost verbatim a facebook post she made about having a fun time getting together with the neighbors and then expressed her surprise about how many "likes" she got