stuff white people like

http://stuffwhitepeoplelike.wordpress.com/2008/02/11/63-expensive-sandwiches/

Dr Huxtable not white: hypothesis disproven.

i think on the whole they like to drive like *this*.

black people, on the other hand...

i thought this thread title was saying "Stuff white people, like"

Stuff white people like: black people

that expensive sandwich looks delicious.

http://farm3.static.flickr.com/2155/2128597322_a5e3f1c3d2.jpg

Fact: Japanese people hate Japan.

That sandwich looks like barf.

I am not convinced by this website. Fundamentally it is not very funny, and it just does things like say "white people like cycling hurr hurr they are stupid". In contrast, Black People Love Us is actually funny and says interesting things about the world.

white people like metafilter

yeah i agree vicar, they're choosing this incredibly narrow slice of urban/cosmopolitan/bourgeois culture and presenting it as "white people"

dg i have never looked at the metafilter site although i know what it is - maybe i am not in fact white

jokes bruv

what?

the blog is practically unreadable.

yeah i agree vicar, they're choosing this incredibly narrow slice of urban/cosmopolitan/bourgeois culture and presenting it as "white people"

I think this is supposed to be implicit in its comedy value

The other thing I don't like about it is the way it takes some perfectly reasonable things - nice sandwiches, wholefoods, bicycles - and then implies that people are stupid for liking them.

However, I salute their mockery of people who stand still at concerts, for all that the Onion beat them to it by many years.

Whining.

yeah i agree vicar, they're choosing this incredibly narrow slice of urban/cosmopolitan/bourgeois culture and presenting it as "white people"

I think this is supposed to be implicit in its comedy value

-- DJ Mencap, Friday, 15 February 2008 14:23 (10 minutes ago) Link

yes. And I did chuckle

By the way - has this site been picked up in the white controlled media or something? It seems to be all over the Internet right now.

white people like metafilter

-- DG, Friday, February 15, 2008 1:32 PM (1 hour ago)

i was joking but it's true :(

i dunno somebody posted it to some thingie -- now i feel like a cog in some grand meme design

"White people be all naive and well meaning, lol."

http://www.zmemusic.com/wp-content/uploads/2007/12/radiohead460.jpg

What a crock of shit.

The website that is, not Thom.

my dad held up an obama sign at a street corner in knoxville, tennessee last week. he was there for an hour and a half. on three separate occasions, people rolled down their windows and shouted something about "niggers" at him. two of them gave him the finger.

an hour and a half.

well he was in tennessee after all

OMG this website will be indispensable in my fantasy dissertation about how "white culture" gets defined. Seriously, I have been wanting to write this for 8 years now.

it would be so awesome if in the middle of all that stuff they have on their site they just calmly added a post called "hating niggers"

#59 Natural Medicine

....Since white people can’t really blame any race for their problems, they need to blame corporations.

Yuk yuk

I refuse to actually read the blog entries but seeing the headings "Divorce" and "Recycling" did make me chuckle.

someone plz hack this wordpress POS blog and we can sign in and make it interesting.

#69 - Puerto Rican Tranny Whores

#62 Knowing what’s best for poor people <-- lol

White people often have spiritual moments at concerts by the following artists: Common, Brand Nubian, Tribe Called Quest, and Del Tha Funky Homosapien.

LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL

HI DERE, THIS IS 1993

Jim DeRogatis, white person extraordinnairre.

eh, their hatred of non-profits (which includes churches, of course) is confusing. It also implies if a person of any other race than white likes any of the above stuff (expensive sandwiches, charity work, bikes), that they're acting """white"""".

This just sounds like an upper middle class white person's rant against upper middle class white bourgeois culture, like a higher level of some kid's "hipsters 4 f4ags" site.

new entry for stuff white people like: making fun of white people on a blog.

#4 Assists <- lol

this blog is like a weird, less obviously evil example of ethan's thing about racial puppetry in right-wing comics--like 80% of the "things white people like" are "liberal" or "hippie" things coded as left-wing in some way, the implicit statement being "if these are things white people like, non-whites must dislike them." therefore non-whites dislike co-ed sports, recycling, "knowing whats best for poor people" (<--- this is the best example of what i mean), etc. not to mention that "white" here is coded (as usual) as "clueless" and "uncool" (im sympathetic to that characterization), so shit like "not shopping at wal-mart" is a totally "clueless" thing to do

i dont remember brand nubian being real big w/teh wites tho

That's a hueg part of the lolz for me!

the guest entry on rap songs white people love is cute, too.

Knowing the words up to "I get stupid, I mean outrageous" is standard and unremarkable. Knowing everything up through the hook means you’ll be frenching at 80s Night.

Kiss me.

most of that rap list could be "songs that pretty much everyone likes"

upper middle class white bourgeois culture

What's fascinating to me, though, is how this becomes read as "white culture," full stop. Although it's slightly different from what's usually considered "white culture" -- that is, suburban middle-class soccer moms and patio dads, as exemplified in the following:

http://ecx.images-amazon.com/images/I/7155KDERFZL._AA280_.gif

actually really im not loling at this because like, http://www.oldpunks.com/1fishbarrel.jpg

I think it's got potential -- I loled myself when I saw "Divorce" -- but someone otm that it's pretty poorly written. Which is why we much hack this blog and make it better.

I'd like to reiterate my stance of "fuck reading most of this, I'm chuckling at the headers and namechecking Brand Nubian".

I'm waiting for the "double-no-whip-foam-skinny-etc-etc" yuks.

I lol-ed at the co-ed sports title.

im listening to brand nubian now

i like it (i am white people)

i just dont really like "racial humor" that conservative douchebags could look at and be like "lol at those white people, clearly im down since i hate co-ed sports"

hey there's a bit about apple lol

Brand Nubian sampled Edie Brickell, right?

What's fascinating to me, though, is how this becomes read as "white culture," full stop. Although it's slightly different from what's usually considered "white culture" -- that is, suburban middle-class soccer moms and patio dads, as exemplified in the following:

-- jaymc, Friday, February 15, 2008 4:34 PM (11 minutes ago) Bookmark Link

good work overlooking this is all completely US-centric jaymc!!!

yah on slow down - rules so hard xp

Edie Brickell, man, that is some white shit right there.

<-- listening to Bob Marley, lol white guy

lots of rap records sample white music like edie brickell but then they use their special not-wite musical powers to make not-wite music out of it :)

max totally fucking otm, exactly what i thought reading this ... i swear this was concocted by a conservative think tank to make fun of hybrid cars or some shit

NUMBER ONE ANSWER

http://brisonent.com/uploaded_images/Soulja-Boy-Atlanta-743244.jpg

This definitely has its funny moments but it's essentially reductionist, divisive, and shallow humor. I don't take offense at this (as a white guy, I mean) but it leaves me a little meh.

entire blog owned by the 'sideways' joke in '30 rock' basically.

lol yes

was going to talk shit about brand nubian name drop, then remembered thats who br3ihan wrote his piece on for 'marooned'

didnt they release an album last year

I don't find it particularly funny, but I find it enormously interesting.

very much in character 2008

So if I was to say that this comes off more like it's satirising someone else's satire - ie lazy "white culture" zings - a lot of you would think I'm giving it too much credit?

I think there's too much authentic bitterness in the jibes for it to be a parody

max & deej totally fucking otm, if maybe getting a little carried away. site trades in smug, condescending frat-boy yucks. lolz @ goofy non-profits, "caring about poor people", etc. doesn't even make sense. these aren't white things on any level.

So if I was to say that this comes off more like it's satirising someone else's satire - ie lazy "white culture" zings - a lot of you would think I'm giving it too much credit?

yeah. way too much.

ya mencap i wish the writing was good enough that i could believe that

lol contenderizer, u mad

I don't have the inclination to look at the whole list. Is NASCAR on there? White people fucking love NASCAR. And chewing tobacco.

Haha between this and that Guardian blog thing yesterday I seriously have to stop trying to figure out whether everything I read is a joke or not

(inc Bill's post I meant to say)

Yeah, iwas kidding. Because those two things (both of which I like) are totally at odds with the shit in that dumb list.

I don't have the inclination to look at the whole list. Is NASCAR on there? White people fucking love NASCAR. And chewing tobacco.

-- Bill Magill

No. There is absolutely nothing on this site that does not skew "white" as liberal, urban, educated and (upper) middle class. Check this out - shortest entry in the blog:

#8 Barack Obama

"Because white people are afraid that if they don’t like him that they will be called racist."

Or this, which directly precedes it:

#7: Diversity

"White people love ethnic diversity, but only as it relates to restaurants..."

Or this, on white people's supposed love of lawyers (suggesting that recourse to litigation is a "LOLWTF white people" kinda thing):

Please note that when around white people, that it is social suicide to admit or state that you don’t have a regular lawyer. But perhaps the one main reason why white people love lawyers is the sense that they are giving back to the community. Most white people major in the arts, and law school is pretty much the only option for anyone with a BA that wants a decent paying job.

This site is entirely political. I'm not saying that it's intended to influence political opinion, but it at least displays a very strong point of view. Gotta wonder though:

...has this site been picked up in the white controlled media or something? It seems to be all over the Internet right now.

- Dirty

Half of this site reads like a reinterpretation of Def Comedy Jam without the sex jokes.

#11 Asian Girls

LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL

#20 Being an expert on YOUR culture

LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL

White people love to laugh, so it’s no surprise that some of the funniest people in the world are white! But do not believe that white people find all types of humor funny. BET Comicview for example is not considered funny, and white people generally get little to no enjoyment out of the program.

LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL

why the fuck did you link to this, Tracer?

#20 Being an expert on YOUR culture

-- HI DERE

Granted, a fair amount of it is otm wrt the group it's describing.

"White people love ethnic diversity, but only as it relates to restaurants..." made me LOL too.

BET Comicview for example is not considered funny, and white people generally get little to no enjoyment out of the program.

^^^
the only people i ever see laugh at comicview are white

and sometimes asian

def comedy jam is hilarious to all the racist frat kids i know, and seldom to me.

there is the implicit condescension of things like 'comedians of comedy' which irks me sometimes (while i'm laughing).
runteldat?

Stuff like this is what makes it golden to me:

<I>Also, if you see a white person in a Prius you can say “wow, that’s great to see that you’re doing something for the earth.” The white person will feel very good about themselves and offer to drive you home, to Ikea, or drop you off at 80s night.</I>

err, i should specify: the newest incarnation of def comedy jam is not very funny. the old episodes are still totally mint. (remember when we all laughed together at sinbad?)

the parenthetical might've been a bit of a lie

his sitcom was underrated

http://img5.allocine.fr/acmedia/rsz/434/x/x/x/medias/nmedia/18/36/04/41/18448060.jpg

aka worst Quantum Leap slash ever.

stop that

jeff foxworthy is funnier than this shit.

lol @ "assists", "awareness", amy_goodman.jpg

also Sterling OTM, I missed that lololol

xpost: Jeff Foxworthy being funnier than this doesn't make this unfunny, Tom.

tombot - stirrin shit, friday - do i need an excuse??

you might be white if other people see you driving a Prius and say “wow, that’s great to see that you’re doing something for the earth.” Then you feel good about yourself and offer to drive them home, to Ikea, or drop them off at 80s night.

jeff foxworthy is not funnier than this shit

well did we already do a thread about doug feith publishing a book? 'cause I can go read that

if i look at this as "stuff people on the east side of Madison like" (ie the part of town w/co-ops, co-ed ultimate frisbee leagues, dogs, and bicycles), it becomes hilariously otm.

when did ILX become "i love laughing at boring obvious targets"

But this shit isn't very funny. Just one white man's opinion.

xxpost

when did ILX become "i love laughing at boring obvious targets"

Sometime in 2000?

Stuff like this is what makes it golden to me:

Also, if you see a white person in a Prius you can say “wow, that’s great to see that you’re doing something for the earth.”

s.clover

It's kind of funny, maybe? I dunno, repetitive cheap shots at obvious shit seldom make me LOL, but people are different, so whatever. Still, what strikes me here is the relentless, embittered condescention towards the idea of "helping others". Almost every entry manages to sneak that in, even when there isn't anything obviously altruistic about the LOL-whitey in question. It's weird, is all I'm saying. The site is way more concerned with attacking the idea of altruism (often kinda angrily) than with white culture as a whole.

I NEVER SAID IT WAS FUNNY

meaning the stuff about a certain kind of liberal, granola, lower-middle to middle class culture is pretty funny. other stuff on that site is not quite as funny.

xp to myself

Second ILX thread ever or something: lolKidAcover

Even the fucking assists one, which is (or could be) actually funny, is really just a dig at "helping".

I think I would find this site a whole lot funnier if it were as offensive as real people - black, white, or anybody else - is when they are making fun of something or arguing about something and not worried about getting caught.

For instance, my co-worker called me up the other day from his job to tell me that two secretaries got into a yelling match about whether or not Obama is black. I mean, that's just funny.

as real people are

http://ninecooks.typepad.com/photos/uncategorized/miraclewhip.jpg

http://cache.viewimages.com/xc/2640600.jpg?v=1&c=ViewImages&k=2&d=17A4AD9FDB9CF1934A2752006EF5F0ED5B9D53F8992D98095A5397277B4DC33E

http://cn1.kaboodle.com/hi/img/2/0/0/19/2/AAAAAmv7JckAAAAAABkq7Q.jpg

xxpost Ha, mayo is actually mentioned in History of White People in America. There's a gag in which the prototypical white family (the dad is played by Fred Willard) are having a backyard cookout, and they all come back inside to fetch their own personal jar of industrial-size mayo from the fridge.

http://www.blue-tomato.at/pics/markenseiten/Volcom/volcom_0708.jpg

The joke isn't in how it's describing white pplz at all though, it's more on the level of "To improve your social standing you will need to interact with people who are very strange by your standards. Here are the things you can say to them." Like: If you find yourself in an awkward silence with white people, just mention how you want to go to Japan. They will immediately begin talking about how their trip to Japan, or their favorite stuff from Japan, but it will be entirely about them. This is useful as you no longer have to talk, and they will like you for letting them talk about themselves.

They don't pull this tone off all the time, but I think it's a sort of more clever and subtle thing than folks are giving it credit for.

They don't pull this tone off all the time, but I think it's a sort of more clever and subtle thing than folks are giving it credit for.

This is true, but you can't be a one trick pony. Look - white people are HUGE targets for derisive humor, and deservedly so. I mean, I went to McDonald's yesterday for lunch, and the moms with their 2-4 year olds in the playground would have been FERTILE ground for humor.

I think I have a high bar for this type of comedy, though - if you're going to make fun of something, at least try to have something insightful in it, and then get all offensive.

No offense, s.clove, but I think everybody gets it, as far as the tone, approach, humor style, etc. And sure, it's potentially funny, as any kind of humor is potentially funny. But this site is seldom strange, witty, insightful or suprising enough to actually make me laugh (did like the "breakfast" one). And I can't get around the fact that the underlying P.O.V disgusts me.

Is it true that black people think white people smell like dogs?

Look - white people are HUGE targets for derisive humor, and deservedly so. I mean, I went to McDonald's yesterday for lunch, and the moms with their 2-4 year olds in the playground would have been FERTILE ground for humor.

I am offended by this.

d00dz, this site isn't making fun of white people (mainly). and I'm not sure what the underlying pov is except some understandable cynicism about the limits of "multicultural" values.

And sometimes it seems like it's just bitter: <I>So why would white people spend all that time studying and working to get into college if they are just going to read books that they might have read in their free time? Because white people have it made. They can take that degree and easily parlay it into a non profit job, an art gallery job, or work in publishing. If the pay is low, no problem, their parents will happily help out with rent until they magically start making six figures or non-magically turn 40.</I>

I went to McDonald's yesterday for lunch, and the moms with their 2-4 year olds in the playground would have been FERTILE ground for humor.

http://cache.viewimages.com/xc/2640600.jpg?v=1&c=ViewImages&k=2&d=17A4AD9FDB9CF1934A2752006EF5F0ED5B9D53F8992D98095A5397277B4DC33E

^^^things black people like

stuffthatwhitepeoplelikeonmycat.com

I'm not sure what the underlying pov is

s.clover

Middle class white liberals are idiots. Altruism is idiocy. All nonselfish values are the product of guilt.

the other thing is that most of the folks who i know who are real into japanese iconography/art etc. are Momus black people ... so the satire is pretty imprecise. w/ something like this you realllly need to be precise with it and they're just not ...

add to my own xpost: I mean, if you can find me ten posts that don't reflect that idea-set on some level or another, I'll find you at least 50 that do. And I don't think you can. And my 50 will be pretty damn direct about it.

awesome people like michael mcdonald.

new thread: white people that black people like

there's a list in ego trip's big book of racism like that

http://images.google.com/url?q=http://images.amazon.com/images/P/B000000Y47.01.LZZZZZZZ.jpg&usg=AFQjCNHvNpyDXVhZT1iYQd3jDLMeFZsQBA

new thread: white people that black people like

-- kenan, Friday, February 15, 2008 1:08 PM (2 minutes ago) Bookmark Link

not a new thread.

some of u are taking this too srsly CONTENDERIZER

theres an image thread somewhere in the archives of 'white people black people like'

http://images.salon.com/books/int/2002/02/20/clinton/story.jpg

Look - white people are HUGE targets for derisive humor, and deservedly so. I mean, I went to McDonald's yesterday for lunch, and the moms with their 2-4 year olds in the playground would have been FERTILE ground for humor.

I am offended by this.

Good. Because there were funnies there, the funniest of which was the fact that none of them would have found being made fun of reasonable or at all appropriate.

I also live in South Pasadena, one of the whitest places ever.

some of u are taking this too srsly CONTENDERIZER

Okay, yeah, I know. I quit. <tinfoilhat>But I half suspect the people who run this site view it as explicitly political. In addition to the funny, I mean.</tinfoilhat>

I half suspect that the people who run this site aren't white.

Okay. I was wondering about that myself. But I don't think it matters at all, either way.

this site actually a viral produced by obama's campaign

this thought brought to you by a misreading of HI DERE's last post

theres an image thread somewhere in the archives of 'white people black people like'

It would just be inviting more cl*sterf*ck to make an obama joke right now, wouldn't it?

Nah. The site already made that joke.

this site actually a viral produced by obama's clinton's campaign

fixed

oh good another boring, straightforward gag

no wait guys it's actually Mike Gravel's personal blog

he's not trying to be funny at all, just making his own honest observations

Awesomes: White couples usually fight over who gets to read the Sunday Magazine first. How do we know this? They will tell us repeatedly about how they always fight over the Sunday magazine.

I thought the NYT was how Asians keep in touch with their homeland.

white people be sensitive to criticism

contenderizer is seriously reminding me of Chris Elwood in how high.

pretty lame, but I lol'd at this in the Whole Foods/ co-op bit:

These stores are excellent for bringing children, as there is nothing that they actually want.

“Oh, mommy, look chocolate!”
“No Joshua, that’s carob.”
“I want it.”
“Ok.”

The child will then take a bite and realize that nothing in the store can be trusted.

You know what's weird? I get more offended by criticism of the region of the country I live in more than criticism of my race.

Joaks about the Sunday magazine doesn't bother me, but "lol, of course they scream nigger in Nashville" does.

I'm not losing sleep over either though.

I get more offended by criticism of the region of the country I live in more than criticism of my race

This is called "being white," surely

Or anyway "being part of the dominant ethnic majority"

you guys are really misreading contenderizer here

haha no one is complaining about white people getting made fun of

i think im plenty aware that as white folks we are quick to get butthurt about being clowned since we're not used to it but really this satire is wack and has underlying principles that have nothing to do w/ race and everything to do w/ really conservative values, its just using 'edgy' race humor as a disguise to get liberal readers agreeing w/ it. "if you don't agree why, you don't have a sense of humor! And may in fact not be racially sensitive!"

im less even "offended" and more "why does anyone think this played out sub-mencia shit is funny"

lololololololol really? "sub-mencia"?

"White people, always voting for John Kerry the latte liberal!!!"

"Isn't it funny how white people listen to Air America?"

"Caring about the environment, lolololol"

I get more offended by criticism of the region of the country I live in more than criticism of my race

This is called "being white," surely

-- nabisco, Friday, February 15, 2008 1:33 PM (Friday, February 15, 2008 1:33 PM) Bookmark Link

Ha, maybe so. When I wrote "my race" upthread, I realized that I never really have to think about what race I am. No one looks at me funny; no one wants me to go back to my home country; I don't have to identify myself as a category on any regular basis.

It's like I'm so vanilla (har, watch your ribs from cracking) that my regionalism is the only thing that I can ever define myself as.

Anyway. I'm sure they shout ugly names in Boston, Jersey, and Idaho, too.

sub-mencia is not a real concept, max

that is like saying 'below zero on the kelvin scale'

Joaks about the Sunday magazine doesn't bother me, but "lol, of course they scream nigger in Nashville" does.

Oh man, I'm sorry PP, really. I meant no offense.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KKTDRqQtPO8

ok guys i will give you that this is funnier than mencia (white people like: hyperbole). it has its moments, esp. the ones sterling points out... i just cant really believe ppl are laughing at shit like "knowing whats best for poor people"--limbaugh makes that same joke six times a week just not gussied up in "clever race humor"

what am i missing here? is it funny cause its a blog?

I was born in the south and live in washington DC. I think about what race I am (and my sexual orientation) pretty much every fucking day I leave the house.

Thanks, deej. Thing is, I don't see this site as laughing at white people at all, in any way. I see very specifically mocking liberals and liberal values. Period.

That's fine, lib values are a good target for laffs. But the site's "stupid liberals = white folks" thing bugs the hell out of me. As far as I'm concerned, that's twisted fucking racist bullshit.

That might go a long way to explaining why this shit is dumb and obvious to me, I don't know. xpost.

i think about tom's sexual orientation every day too

Don't you mean ... BAJA-MENCIA? GET IT, BECAUSE HE'S HISPANIC?

most of those 'gang signs' are just the shucker

shocker, i mean. shucker is something totally different.

lol district whiteys

does that picture at the top have a dude in blackface kneeling in the center??

certainly seems to

http://www.niggaknow.com/

No harm, no foul, Que.

The majority of the people I see each day are white, but then again, I don't live in Washington D.C.

I hardly ever think about my sexual orientation or anyone else's. It's like thinking about my shoe size or something.

I live in a gay neighborhood in a black town run by old money slave-owner ivy-legacy scum.

And I'm also in a bad mood today this week for whatever reason.

Did you guys ever notice how white people are really big on unions? whats the deal with that?

were you in a good mood last week???

xp

they're all "man, organized labor is the shit!!!"

stfu white people

ok I guess ppl are angry at things like this: http://stuffwhitepeoplelike.wordpress.com/2008/01/23/18-awareness/ ?

because seriously. if you don't see what race has to do with it, or why it's not like rush or...

damn this thread is making me depressed.

Stuff White People Like is now a .org!

Hopefully it brings us one step closer to MoveOn.org (one of the most beloved sites by white people)

Hey guys I'm not really reading much of this thread or much of this blog, but ... whence the idea that this is seriously making fun of anyone? It's most likely to be read by people who chuckle fondly with recognition. This is no more making fun of anyone than it's an insult to pat your friend on the head and go "aww, you're such a dork." Those aren't teeth.

pretty sure it's just badly-executed satire. why be offended? traditional 'white people culture' is certainly as silly as shit, and due as hell for send-up.

Comparing sexual orientation to shoe size makes me uncomfortable, for some reason.

i am an eleven and a half of straightness

but my fallen arches are bisexual

more lulz: In white person law, if you meet someone at 80s night and then go out for breakfast the next morning, then you are automatically in a relationship. There are no exceptions.

Hey guys I'm not really reading much of this thread or much of this blog, but ... whence the idea that this is seriously making fun of anyone?

i dont really see anyone getting mad at it making fun of anyone. i see people being like 'lol they've got our number' and people being like 'this is unfunny and its conservative values are suspect'

sterling, I'm just very tired of predictable privileged college kid behavior and predictable jokes about privileged college kid behavior. it really is essentially no different than making blanket women be shoppin gags or homos talk with a lisp shit and pretending that pointing these things out in 2008 is in any way useful, funny, fresh, illuminating, whatever, it's just aggravating. go have an argument about epistemology or some such shit.

traditional 'white people culture' is certainly as silly as shit, and due as hell for send-up.

oh yes I had noticed the utter dearth of satirical takes on the ruling class in our nation's history, thank god somebody finally stood up and took on the challenge

im not offended, just baffled by the idea that this is actually satirizing white culture--i have no problem laughing at well-done satire of "white culture," but this blog is neither a) well done or b) actually sending up "white culture." three quarters of the awareness weeks on my college campus are sponsored by non-whites; most of this shit i strongly identify with "liberals" of races rather than specifically whites.

maybe its because im in college and everyone is involved with a cause of some kind so it doesnt seem like a "white" thing?

xpost tom's right, this is "stuff college kids like" way more than "stuff white people like"

in fact, reading it as "stuff college kids like" makes it a lot funnier

What makes this even more appealing for white people is that you can raise “awareness” through expensive dinners, parties, marathons, selling t-shirts, fashion shows, concerts, eating at restaurants and bracelets.

yes, we all know how much black and latino people hate eating at restaurants!!!

only if you are given to laughing at college kids, though. once again my particular geographical issues cause me problems in this area

Deej I don't even see conservative values: this reads to me like standup about urban white bourgeois values that comes chucklingly from right WITHIN the urban white bourgeois world and mentality.

Unless "conservative" stems from the way you could interpolate sections of this into David Brooks's Bobos in Paradise book without anyone noticing

somebody had to eventually bring that book up on this thread. glad it was you and not me

Sorry, not "urban white bourgeois values" -- that should say "URBANE bourgeois HABITS"

http://www.wwnorton.com/college/english/nael/images/victorian/burden.jpg

in fact, reading it as "stuff college kids like" makes it a lot funnier <---- does not equal "makes this funny"

i think im plenty aware that as white folks we are quick to get butthurt about being clowned since we're not used to it
'lol they've got our number'
I live in a gay neighborhood in a black town run by old money slave-owner ivy-legacy scum.
Or this, on white people's supposed love of lawyers (suggesting that recourse to litigation is a "LOLWTF white people" kinda thing)
three quarters of the awareness weeks on my college campus are sponsored by non-whites

White folks post like *this*.

Comparing sexual orientation to shoe size makes me uncomfortable, for some reason.

-- Michael White, Friday, February 15, 2008 2:01 PM (Friday, February 15, 2008 2:01 PM) Bookmark Link

I have a really long nose, too.

i was gonna say, i'm pretty sure this site is written by white liberals, guys.

xp

if the website was funny that would be one thing. like actually funny. like ha ha i am laughing at the internet funny.

c.lover otm about the breakfast post. Was talking about that upthread. Only one i actually laughted at. But, seriously, about half of them are just like "Awareness" in terms of what and/or how they're mocking.

And I finally get to say nabisco offtm. The satire is sometimes gentle, but a lot of the time it's bitter as hell. And the site reserves its bitterness for the liberal stuff.

It really is like indie Limbaugh.

that comes chucklingly from right WITHIN the urban white bourgeois world and mentality

yea thats how i read it, granted i only read like 2 paragraphs then skimmed the rest of the post titles...

OTM Mr. Que

haha i dont know who the blog is written by but i think its the same person who writes the same "funny" op-ed in my college paper every week

also reading the comments is a pretty telling insight to the kind of person who finds this funny and OTM, fwiw

vice magazine thread 2008

If it's written by libs of any race, it's sick with self-loathing to the point where it implodes. If it's written by conservatives of any race, it's smug and nasty.

(1 minute ago)
(1 minute ago)
(1 minute ago)
(1 minute ago)
(48 seconds ago)
(44 seconds ago)
(10 seconds ago)

race thread. friday. well done tracer!

Sorry, not "urban white bourgeois values" -- that should say "URBANE bourgeois HABITS"

http://www.dvdoutsider.co.uk/dvd/pix/m/me/metropolitan2.jpg

i think its the same person who writes the same "funny" op-ed in my college paper every week

ha, that's one thing i love reading in a college paper, the op-eds.

when i first started reading it i assumed it was a nonwhite person's guide to funny things their white friends were doing that their nonwhite friends would identify with when hanging out w/ white people. Potentially funny. Then it started getting weird the more i read and the more disdain for liberal principles i.e.
http://stuffwhitepeoplelike.wordpress.com/2008/02/10/62-knowing-whats-best-for-poor-people/

honestly tom, i don't think that garden-gnome middle-class white culture has taken nearly the share of knocks that most other ethnic/class groupings have been subjected to w/r/t comedy stylins

i should admit that when the "christian fellowship" on campus had a "homeless awareness" week where they slept in boxes in the quad (while using their laptops and eating at the dining hall) i wrote a "funny" op-ed

it seems to me it is mostly softball "knowing" wink-wink-nudge-nudge jokiness leveled at itself from the inside, in kind of a dissembling "see? we can take it too, and on the chin!" sort of way

This is about a million miles away from Vice Magazine, which is the actual indie Limbaugh.

xpost FUCK YOU TOM FOR GETTING THE VICE MENTION IN BEFORE ME, TYPICAL IMPERIALIST WHITE TYPING OPPRESSING THE BLACK MAN AS PER USUAL

i should admit that when the "christian fellowship" on campus had a "homeless awareness" week where they slept in boxes in the quad (while using their laptops and eating at the dining hall) i wrote a "funny" op-ed

-- max, Friday, February 15, 2008 2:16 PM (1 minute ago) Bookmark Link

homelessness is just like camping!

Dallas Phones
You have a pretty funny site. Very creative. I’ve always wanted to hear white jokes too. Got a site for that?

max dan and deej all funnier than that website

I never took a laptop camping! Wow, white people have it good.

so does the flickr page linked on the blog belong to the author?

as a colombian, i can't go camping without my donkey and a bag of coke

honestly tom, i don't think that garden-gnome middle-class white culture has taken nearly the share of knocks that most other ethnic/class groupings have been subjected to w/r/t comedy stylins

it's not my fault you never watch television

Contenderizer, do you seriously think eye-rolling sniping at the commonplaces of your social peers equates to being against them? By that logic, ILM would constitute a hate crime against 20-something white people, perpetrated by 20-something white people.

I mean, there are a few of those that count totally be coming from a conservative, but I dunno, I'm not sure how much it matters to speculate. (Though I do think that if the root impulse here were a conservative one it would not waste so much time doing jokey things about shopping habits or frame it as "white people" to begin with, you know?)

If this thread is making your screen feel a little dirty, this link might help:

http://cache.valleywag.com/assets/resources/screenclean.swf

q: what did the white person get on his SATs?

a: ranch dressing

if network television ever did anything cutting-edge or actually incisively cruel-funny i would take it behind the middle school ...

http://www.enotes.com/wasp/

you should start a blog linds

oh, c'mon deej, tell me this is not OTM: "It is a poorly guarded secret that, deep down, white people believe if given money and education that all poor people would be EXACTLY like them. In fact, the only reason that poor people make the choices they do is because they have not been given the means to make the right choices and care about the right things."

lol sorority girls + ranch dressing

Hey, I slept in a box on the quad one night in college!

i don't get the ranch dressing joke. am i too white or too old?

Wow remy, all that black people get is a standard-issue knife and the innate ability to dance.

(xpost: Remy you probably have seen this already but look up Christohper Titus's short-lived Fox sitcom, that was some deeply cruel, amazing shit almost on par with "Married: With Children". Actually most of Fox's sitcoms seem to be about satirizing white people. Oh, also check out "It's Always Sunny In Philadelphia" on FX. There's definitely a "lol white ppl" market out there in American comedy.)

oh, c'mon deej, tell me this is not OTM: "It is a poorly guarded secret that, deep down, white people believe if given money and education that all poor people would be EXACTLY like them. In fact, the only reason that poor people make the choices they do is because they have not been given the means to make the right choices and care about the right things."

-- s.clover, Friday, February 15, 2008 2:23 PM (22 seconds ago) Bookmark Link

yeah but why is that impulse necessarily incorrect?
Like, its wrong to assume that about ALL PEOPLE but i think its largely correct that a lot of the reasons for poverty = inequal access to education etc

uh

Sterling that is both

(a) not OTM, for boring subtle reasons this thread is not going to care about

(b) true and correct that most poor people are a lot like white people already, because they are white

it's possible i sorta unintentionally avoid network race comedies of any stripe (color?) because i find them mostly regressive and toothless and has-been?

i subscribe to the amiri baraka school of laffs, but i also think that george lopez is really funny. hmm...

How can that be not OTM and true at the same time, nabisco?

ignoring the fatal flaw of Nabisco's (b) the idea that poor people have fewer opportunities for advancement is not a 'white people thing'

boring and subtle reasons, DP

(uhhh to be clear i mean the fatal flaw that Nabisco pointed out IN (b), not that Nabisco's argument was flawed)

http://www.crossingwallstreet.com/Trading-Places--C10045389.jpeg
"Are you suggesting a wager?"

(xp: "Titus" is one of the meanest comedies I've ever seen. If you have seen any of his standup, it's basically that translated directly into a show.)

Actually most of Fox's sitcoms seem to be about satirizing white people.

This is interesting to me, because for the majority of the population (i.e., white people) "white culture" is invisible and so I would imagine that whatever satire is intended falls flat. Whereas a show about black people is automatically "about" black culture simply by virtue of the fact that the subject is The Other. Or put it this way: to white people, "culture" is something that other people have.

That's what bothers me, nabs. I don't know where the authors of the site are coming from. It presents itself as coming from w/in white culture, doing exactly what you and others say: self-mocking in a light-hearted way. But underneath that, there's this toxic level of National Lampoon, P.J. O'Rourke-style contempt for even the idea of altruistic values. The posts hammer this point relentlessly. The site is 100% ideologically consistent in this. At least Vice is conflicted. It may be fucked-up, but it doesn't seem agenda-driven.

This site attacks ONLY the liberal aspects of white bourgeois culture, and in doing so, it's perfectly happy to lump in liberal stuff that is no way specifically white. Non-profits are LOL-whitey? They're 95% white (as that entry "jokes")? The secret truth is that people who work for non-profits get paid crazy dollars? WTF? None of that makes any sense as anything other than a direct attack on liberal values, white or otherwise.

Site is fucked-up. Fact that it presents itself as something other than what it is makes it worse.

That last one re: Nabisco, obv.

"attacks"

site attacks ONLY the liberal aspects of white bourgeois culture

is craseee

lol the non-profit i worked for for the past 2 years was african-american and the staff was largely african american!!! The thing is, not only is this agenda conservative but it pulls all the teeth from the satire by being wholly inaccurate ... activist kids @ max's school are multi ethnic, i worked for a black-operated non-profit, the presumption that white people 'like going to restaurants' (uhhh ... doesnt everyone??) so its not like the only problem is its political views, its that those views interfere w/ accuracy which keeps it from being funny.

for boring subtle reasons this thread is not going to care about

I care, and am curious, and anyway when has that stopped you before?

contenderizer: possibly the site is only talking about one aspect here because the whole point is "how to talk to white people and get them to like you" and vis a vis other sorts of folks the answer is the pretty much un-lulz: "don't try. they won't."

It presents itself as coming from w/in white culture, doing exactly what you and others say: self-mocking in a light-hearted way.

If you look at the linked flickr site, it becomes pretty quickly obvious that is exactly what it is doing. At least it seems that way to me.

c'mon man, expensive sandwiches.

In fact, the only reason that poor people make the choices they do is because they have not been given the means to make the right choices and care about the right things

i guess what makes me mildly annoyed by this is that if this sentence is satirical--i.e. if it's placed up there for ridicule--than the opposite point is the non-ridiculous point: "poor people make the choices they do because its bred in them." i KNOW that the defense is "they just mean going to wal-mart instead of whole foods" but its hard not to read that as "poor people choose to be poor," which leaves a bad taste in my mouth. im not offended, this dude isnt running for president, im just irritated and confused by the idea that this blog is "funny."

but apparently objecting to it just makes me as clueless and white as the objects of satire

It is a poorly guarded secret that, deep down, white people believe if given money and education that all poor people would be EXACTLY like them. In fact, the only reason that poor people make the choices they do is because they have not been given the means to make the right choices and care about the right things.

-- quoted by s.clover

Thing is, replace "white" in that with "middle-class liberal" and it begins to make sense. It's not a white thing. White conservatives don't feel that way. Non-white liberals often do.

for the sake of community, let's turn this into a food thread

there are about 900 photographs of food on that flickr so we could start there

than the opposite point is the non-ridiculous point: "poor people make the choices they do because its bred in them."

wtf dude. Do you have one of those mats where you jump to conclusions?

If you look at the linked flickr site, it becomes pretty quickly obvious that is exactly what it is doing. At least it seems that way to me.

I think the site intends to do what it suggests. But the nasty political shit seeps in somehow or other. Maybe it's intentional, maybe not, but that doesn't matter in the end.

wow i actually vastly underestimated that number xposts to me

xpost to my self :Perhaps they make the choices they do for all of the complex reasons that people make choices.

It's more of a trampoline, Kenan.

you guys make me want to go all 'thinking gives you wrinkles'

http://farm2.static.flickr.com/1065/717485913_90d96516f4.jpg?v=0
salmon burger, beef burger
would eat

Haha contenderizer it's possible that one of the differences we have is that you're giving these people the benefit of the doubt in terms of being politically coherent

Whereas my opinion of white people talking about "white people" stuff, especially when it's meant to be funny, especially when it's a blog, is that things tend not to be particularly thought-through

Re: poor people -- what Max said, basically. And the boring/subtle part is that the belief is not actually what's outlined there, and more the perfectly sensible belief that things like education and economic opportunity change things and problems that actually MATTER to the poor, like crime and illness and so on. Urbane young liberals do not necessarily imagine that educating and providing opportunities to the poor will make everyone like Feist or something, they imagine that it'll create meaningful and constructive benefits in their life. And again, what Max said: one unappealing alternative is the belief that all the negative aspects of poverty exist because poor people are irredeemable (non-white) low-lifes who just like it that way and can't be helped

jeez guys im not dragging that out of nowhere! "bred into them" is harsh language, i guess? but im using the same rhetoric about the poor thats been slung around for the last 15 years or whatever... "poor people choose to be poor"

xp yes

Urbane young liberals do not necessarily imagine that educating and providing opportunities to the poor will make everyone like Feist or something,

also this is a good joke about white people

http://www.alcorngallery.com/LC/images/PortraitOfDorianGray.jpg

make everyone like Feist

LOL

nabisco i dont think hes inferring political coherency, just that the ultimate effect is conservative whether or not the intent is there

this is like a totally unwinnable fight for me though isnt it, because the more i object the more i look like that guy who just doesnt "get it"

that salmon burger omg

I got some cheap lols out of this even though I'm pretty much the target (I drive a Prius, yr fuckin right; I recycle, yr fuckin right; Whole Foods, check; I chow down at all kindsa restaurants and if that's cultural tourism well then don't eat there proud class warrior, that's more food for me)

it seems gentle enough, I think it's generally a healthy thing to make fun of what's culturally construed as "whiteness." Politically incoherent? sure fine, I don't guess I'm on the internet looking for political coherence nor providing same. Cheap lols @ "expensive sandwiches," hell yes thank you.

http://www4.informatik.uni-erlangen.de/~msrex/images/how/exasperated.gif

ok yeah the quote is sort of conflating class/race as does the site. let's acknowledge that, acknowledge that this is sort of understandable, and move on.

but vis a vis feist, come ON ppl: Why does black people never want to rock?

Note: this makes me want to start an "explaining the Midwest" blog that is all about various definitions of "salad" and adults drinking milk with dinner

salad hierarchy

Guess what I paid for a sandwich at lunch today. Just guess.

i would read that blog

xpost 8 bucks kenan

you should do it, nabs

(esp. since i'm a midwesterner who has no idea what you're talking about)

why dont black people really like any music other than black music?

Deej said what I wanted to. Plus exasperation. Ultimate effect is SUPER conservative. The equation of core liberal values (present in liberals and progressives of every race) w/ the foibles of "goofy-ass, guilt-ridden, expensive-sandwich-eatin' white folks" seems shitty to me.

But sure, on it's own, the expensive sandwich thing = gold.

And yeah, giant salmon burger. Fucking eat it now.

I think you can kind of infer from the blog the viewpoint of a non-white person in a gentrifying neighborhood or something along those lines, hence "white people" = the kind of liberal upwardly mobile white people you find in a major northeast city.

Anyway, wau at this thread. I just thought it was kind of funny. It's not the most brilliant social satire I've ever read or anything, but I think it's way too silly and broad to be taken this seriously.

8 bucks kenan

YES!

deej you really think this is, like, unhealthily conservative? what are the negative effects of this? does it contribute to the further oppression of rich white Prius-drivers? are you against cheap LOLs? I myself cannot afford the high-minded LOLs as I spent all my money on this delicious sandwich

what in god's name are you guys still arguing about

hurting otm, my objection to it is that it's poorly written most of the time, and makes me want to fix it somehow for more lols.

EVERYBODY GO AND WATCH THE PINEAPPLE EXPRESS TRAILER AND STFU

In fact, the only reason that poor people make the choices they do is because they have not been given the means to make the right choices and care about the right things

max: its hard not to read that as "poor people choose to be poor,"

I read it as "white people assume that what they do are the right things, and that anyone who does otherwise is ignorant; whereas it's plausible that what they're doing isn't right, and that one could reasonably choose to do otherwise (e.g. shop at Wal-Mart)." Their way is funnier.

jordan s your attempts at being me are poorly executed and reek of crypto-conservatism

holy shit dudes when did friday afternoon bullshitting become such a big deal

there are more people complaining about this thread than actually talking about it

attacking/satirising:
Divorce (lack of family values)
Recycling, Prius, Bicycles (caring about the environment)
Japan, Asian Food, Sushi (positive attitudes to non-white culture)
Marijuana, Whole Foods, Natural Medicines, The Daily Show (hippies)
etc
etc
seems pretty ultra-conservative to me.

and it's missing "Melody and harmony"

I myself cannot afford the high-minded LOLs as I spent all my money on this delicious sandwich.

Once again, the conservative, sandwich-heavy portfolio pays off for the hungry investor.

hey everyone! look! futurama quotes!

deej you really think this is, like, unhealthily conservative? what are the negative effects of this? does it contribute to the further oppression of rich white Prius-drivers? are you against cheap LOLs? I myself cannot afford the high-minded LOLs as I spent all my money on this delicious sandwich

-- J0hn D., Friday, February 15, 2008 2:56 PM (1 minute ago) Bookmark Link

max is otm this just turns into 'u mad lol'

i dont get lols from this, the satire is bad
i dont give a shit about rich white prius drivers. this is totally picking up on the conservative meme of the latte liberal - it wouldn't be bad if it was just making fun of folks who drive a prius and drink @ starbucks but instead it ties in shit about activism, environmentalism, liberal economics ... the whole thing nabisco and max were just discussing.

ha ha i knew how much kenan's sandwich cost because I AM WHITE

now im just mad that people think i take this seriously or am uptight about it

also yeah jordan stfu no one cares about your stoner comedy*

*lie

humor should not require peer pressure to be funny

ha ha i knew how much kenan's sandwich cost because I AM WHITE

indeed. There is also a subtle law of economics at work. Eight dollars is the most you can charge for something you call a "sandwich" without giving the impression that you're gouging. A nine dollar sandwich is a non starter.

humor should be funny, like expensive sandwiches. that's funny.

nine dollar sandwich is an entree

UNLESS! You're sitting down to eat it. But nine dollars is too much for something you carry away in a paper sack.

xpost exactly

nine dollar sandwich better come with some damn sides.

nine dollar sandwich, i want mashed potatoes and some veggies

i had a $7.50 catfish sandwich (w/po boy toppings) last night! overpriced (but delicious).

oh for a fish sandwich 7.50 seems okay

jordan otm -- nine dollars = overstuffed pastrami AND potato salad. Ten is acceptable if there's also a Cel-Ray in the deal.

But that's not strictly "white people" food, is it? ;)

i had a $13 burger last night

but it was GOOD

goddammit i need a paycheck

Again, deej OTM. Pointing out & discussing the weird, conservative spin to this site isn't the same as getting all bent out of shape about it.

Is it some big threat or evil? Is anything threatened? Fuck no. It's just lame comedy.

Carry on w/ sandwiches. Probably better Friday thread idea in the first place.

plus OTM about paycheck

I had a long let's-talk-turkey thing for you deej but I think short answers are the way to go

everybody otm about how it's badly written but some of it's funny anyway

I am now gonna drive my Prius down to the FedEx place to get a working visa app for Australia sent off *

*100% true

mmmm turkey sandwich with munster and homemade mayo is what i have been rocking lately

I been rockin' Tofurkey with sharp white cheddar, cukes, and dill mustard. Fuck the haters.

attacking/satirising:
Divorce (lack of family values)
Recycling, Prius, Bicycles (caring about the environment)
Japan, Asian Food, Sushi (positive attitudes to non-white culture)
Marijuana, Whole Foods, Natural Medicines, The Daily Show (hippies)
etc
etc
seems pretty ultra-conservative to me.

Nah. Not buying it. Just as easily seen as making fun of the uncomfortable alliance between privilege and social responsibility, with a couple "lol sheep all do the same thing" thrown in. It's got good comedy potential.

im totally down with clowning j0hn for driving a prius btw

making fun of the uncomfortable alliance between privilege and social responsibility

yeah not arguing with that, but isn't that pretty much the content of every cartoon in the 'batshit mental rightwing cartoon' thread?

oh jesus fucking christ

I've been among the guiltiest of parties on this thread, but now it has to die. Please just let it die.

Here's that "great sandwich place" in Manhattan:
http://www.columbine229.com/menu.html
plenty of nine-dollar options, line out-the-door, good breeding, etc

as someone who grew up in rural south carolina and now lives in downtown atlanta, the idea that white people are into this shit and black people arent is like dr morbius level crazy

I see my shift relief has arrived

I Ate Sushi in Buckhead
(True Story)

race threads don't die; they just get less insightful and less funny (if there is any funny to begin with) until they drop off the new answers page. Then revived 6 months later during kerfuffle on another, often unrelated thread.

xxposts

parties

cake

where is the midwest thread, did anyone start that?

doug feith

#20 Being an expert on YOUR culture

It's especially funny when people do this to me about Jewish culture because 1) A lot of times they know more about it than I do and 2) Damnit, I'm white too and your using my own game against me!

as someone who grew up in rural south carolina and now lives in downtown atlanta, the idea that white people are into this shit and black people arent is like dr morbius level crazy

-- and what, Friday, February 15, 2008 3:27 PM (5 minutes ago) Bookmark Link

fuckin thank you

on that tip, I have to mention that h3nry louis g4tes in harvard yard in tight spandex shorts with his bike = indelibly burned into my brain.

omigod generalizations aren't true

lol @ skip gates in spandex

omigod generalizations aren't true

-- remy bean, Friday, February 15, 2008 3:46 PM (2 minutes ago) Bookmark Link

omg generalizations are wholly inaccurate

omg if someone started the blog with any other ethnic descriptor besides "white" in between stuff & people this thread would have been locked about 350 posts ago

I liked the part of Gates's gene-tracing project where he turned out to be mostly European, and the only plausible viewer reaction seemed to be "duh, we saw your parents earlier in the broadcast"

I've been thinking about starting a "Youtube videos of giggly white adolescents doing fad hip-hop dances" thread but the spirit has not yet moved me to do so.

numa numa yay

haha Hurting it would be kinda crepey

THINGS WHITE PEOPLE LIKE A LIST BY KANTLIPS

1. BEVERAGES

I liked the part of Gates's gene-tracing project where he turned out to be mostly European, and the only plausible viewer reaction seemed to be "duh, we saw your parents earlier in the broadcast"

OTM!

2. COMFORTABLE SHOES

Also in that thing Oprah was a little smug about being the only person with no detectable European background at all

Tom Joyner has been an incredible treat throughout the entire broadcast of the second series. Ditto Chris Rock.

4. GOING #2

I'm sad, I haven't caught any of the second one! Did we ever have a thread on the first part? I feel like I remember talking about the photo of the Chris Tucker ancestor where it looked basically like a staged pic of Chris Tucker in period costume. Also all of Chris Tucker's sisters.

just to make the experience complete I attempted to post to this thread from my iPhone while picking up Chinese takeout but I couldn't remember my password so no go

I would make a similar joke about my afternoon, but I kinda had Popeye's for lunch

I didn't actually see the first part. The second part features:

Tina Turner
Maya Angelou
Don Cheadle (ancestors were enslaved by Native Americans! wau)
Chris Rock
Tom Joyner (aka everyone's incredibly comical cousin)
the daughter of the dude who founded Johnson publishing
the daughter of a big-time book editor who passed for white
some random woman whose ancestors were owned by a man who was the cousin of the man who owned Skip's ancestors (!!!)
probably someone I'm forgetting

OH Morgan Freeman is who I'm forgetting!

5. I JUST REMEMBERED A OLD JOKE I HEARD ONCE WHERE THE PERSON MAKING THE JOKE ASKE THE OTHER PEOPLE "WHO HAS TWO THUMBS AND LIKES TO HAVE BLOWJOBS" AND THE ANSWER IS "WHITE PEOPLE"

One time a black kid in one of my high school music classes started going off about how black drummers always have tons of drums and white drummers have like two drums and twenty cymbals (after which he imitated a white drummer bashing lots of cymbals.) It was not-really-true-yet-funny in a similar way to this blog.

I'm the only one who heard "fourth-great-grandparents" as "fourth-grade-grandparents," twice, rite?

Which region of America has the "whitest" white people? I can see arguments being made for New England, the Midwest, the South, California, the Pacific Northwest...

Tight pussy, loose shoes, three-dollar-fifty-cent bag of "Kettle Chips"

Haha hurting, if I had to put forth a stereotype based on drums & cymbals, I would have said the opposite!

white rockers have a million drums, black gospel chops dudes have 8 million little splash and china cymbals.

Tight pussy, loose shoes, three-dollar-fifty-cent bag of "Kettle Chips"

sexydancer wins. Lock thread.

You should see about getting the first one when this one ends! If nothing else, it completely explains Chris Tucker's personality -- there's a segment with a Sunday meal in the Tucker house, which is just a gaggle of awesome older sisters coming over from church and treating him like funny little nuisance brother. And Mae Jemison turns out to be part southeast Asian and is all like "OMG I was in Cambodia once and people kept saying I must be from there!" And Oprah's not European at all and goes "hmmph I knew it," and Gates is mostly European and yes, you're like "quit acting surprised, your dad looks kinda like Eddie Murphy playing the old Jewish guy in Coming to America and your mom is even lighter."

You should see Tom Joyner's family, then!

They make most of Skip's family look burple.

I want to see Gates's parents now. I think I still have a copy of Colored People at home.

I would make a similar joke about my afternoon, but I kinda had Popeye's for lunch

Does the "kinda" dislclaimer mean you immediately vomited after consuming an initial biscuit?

I looked for a picture to refresh my memory, but can't find anything. Jaymc? Their names are Henry Louis Gates Sr. (obv) and Pauline Coleman Gates.

Ha, you think I didn't google that already?

I think there are some photos in Colored People, is what I'm saying.

They also seem awesome, and suddenly I hope nobody ever googles them and arrives on this thread

lolololololololololol

i hope barack obama never googles himself

Completely and totally irrelevant, but I would like to state for the record that I'm all about peremptory vomiting.

leave my mom out of this

-- skipg4tes, Friday, February 15, 2008 5:52 PM (20 minutes from now) Bookmark Link

[ban me] [ban me] [ban me], jr

It's a peculiar kind of fun reading threads about things I briefly enjoyed but not too much, because then the overreactions on both sides and the posturing while sniffing around a position of respectable distaste and the wounded reasonableness and the in-every-internet-thread-ever-ness of the whole thing is neither aggravating nor potentially ruinous of my enjoyment of the subject matter and I get to laugh at the witty comments and zingers and then move on and quietly forget most of it.

blogger

http://cache.trafficmp.com/adv/m0/22/gfb_ipod_touch_survey_souljaboy_crank_728x90.gif

Which region of America has the "whitest" white people? I can see arguments being made for New England, the Midwest, the South, California, the Pacific Northwest...

-- dell

Colorado. That's where SoCal's white flight seems to have ended up.

It's a peculiar kind of fun reading threads about things I briefly enjoyed but not too much, because then the overreactions on both sides and the posturing while sniffing around a position of respectable distaste and the wounded reasonableness and the in-every-internet-thread-ever-ness of the whole thing is neither aggravating nor potentially ruinous of my enjoyment of the subject matter and I get to laugh at the witty comments and zingers and then move on and quietly forget most of it.

-- Fluffy Bear Hearts Rainbows, Friday, February 15, 2008 6:37 PM (1 hour ago) Bookmark Link

ehh i still think when it turns out this was some republican experiment like obama girl you guys will all feel pretty foolish

I'd feel better if you narrowed that down to "Colorado Springs" or something. Besides, much of the state is decent about living with a big Chicano history and presence and culture without being huge reactionary weirdos about it!

http://www.loosescrews.net/merch/tshirts/Walmart%20on%20girl%202.jpg

That's #1.

2. loose shoes

http://img36.picoodle.com/img/img36/4/2/15/f_walmartm_38d3209.jpg

gah that genuinely horrified me at first glance

you should be drunker xp

snorg girl way hotter

I'm sad, I haven't caught any of the second one! Did we ever have a thread on the first part?

-- nabisco, Friday, 15 February 2008 22:03 (Yesterday) Link

it was wisely called on account of manalishi.

Skip Gates' African-American Lives

snorg girl way hotter

Yes. Also strangely more off-putting.

drudgesirens

squirrel police isnt manalishi, right?

about as dumb

oh i'm not sure. some dipshit.

I wish I could get milk with dinner. I had heat-lamp Indian food (2 entrees for $5) for lunch and was way sad I couldn't have some milk.

When are you supposed to drink milk if not at every fucking meal and in between meals?

with cookies!

I have a milk and a whiskey sour on my desk right now.

Some white people like me FWIW. I met one today, we were cool.

i connected with a white storeclerk today over the lack of pay phones in Los Angeles. We ended up acting out some 'where u at' cell phone commercials and he would have let me use the phone there but he said he was about to close and the safe was already locked.

They keep their phone in the safe?

just reminiscing on race comedy i have known, don't mind me.

i must state for the record though blackpeoplelikeus >>>>>>>>>>>> stuff whitepeoplelike, insofar as at least there's a discernible target. I don't know who I'm agreeing with when I say this but stuffwhitepeoplelike comes off alternately conservative/lazy/ironically self-aggrandizing/blandly inscrutable depending on how much thought one wants to put into it.

no question

that blackpeopleloveus >>>> this, I mean

'ironically self-aggrandizing'(+ laden with shitty assumptions) if the creators do turn out to be white liberals, that is.

I think you can kind of infer from the blog the viewpoint of a non-white person in a gentrifying neighborhood or something along those lines, hence "white people" = the kind of liberal upwardly mobile white people you find in a major northeast city.

...
-- Hurting 2, Friday, February 15, 2008 3:55 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark Link

Actually this,

Using this to your advantage can be very difficult as attempts to talk about the books they skimmed while hungover can expose you. It is best to say that you were a first generation college student and your parents demanded that you study math, chemistry, economics or computer science. You had to read Joyce on your own.

makes it seem pretty likely that the author is a child of immigrants, perhaps south asian?

while we're at crazee speculation i'll guess canadian

The other person I forgot from the geneology experiment was Peter Gomes, the reverend at Memorial Church at Harvard. He found out there was a significant amount of Jewish heritage in his family and was completely flummoxed.

So, based on my experience tonight, white people like free shots, free wine, and dance music, including, but not limited to "What is Love" by Haddaway. Furthermore, I have learned that white women are comfortable rubbing up against any old man crotch as long as there is a lap top, a wheel of steel, an ipod, and a female friend within arm's length. Me, I'm just there with the crotch, being like H to the izz-O, V to the izz-A...I do this for my culture.

say what

that made me laugh even though i can't make a lick of sense of it.

no, wait... because

im having a hard time following it!!!...OMC my goodness
(OMC=oh my crap)

stuff white ppl like.

(so very nsfw -- I downloaded a nice Sun Ra reissue, and this was the image that was labeled to be the album cover. I was shocked for a second, and then awed. And then I thought of this thread.)

http://www.marlerblog.com/06.23%20NPR-cvr.jpg

http://thecheckup.files.wordpress.com/2007/10/pbs_logo.jpg

i don't get that last one, grady. pretty much everybody i know likes something on NPR.

whew, good catch remy ;\

Not this white person.

Now if we're talking about K-107.9 The Screeching Eagle Classic Rock All Day Long FM, then there's something else that white people like.

kenans gif otm

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v134/tracerhand/nycsubwaymapforwhitepeople.jpg

^uses the same definition of "white" as the blog.

not even. columbia is further uptown. imbeciles.

Haha, I didn't even notice that they stopped at 86th St on the west side. Also, what about Sunnyside?

i WISH all white people liked brand nubian

remy bean a++ gold star. both bloggers turn out to be canadian, although one now lives in la.

everyone involved in that blog "eats lots of expensive sandwiches," if you know what i mean.

furthur research indicates that one of those guys is filipino. the other is the beardo redhead shown in the #64 recycling post.

redbeard is former/ disillusioned phd candidate in communication and culture, which explains the "field guide to white boho folks/ ethnographic studies" approach and the "boo libs" vibe. narcissism of small differences stuff or "withdrawal in disgust is not the same as apathy."

from blog entry on his myspace, re: pursuing an academic career:

However, I have another reason why so many people pursue this career (this is applied to the arts, not science), for many, it's the belief that you are the one saving the world, you are the one who is going to open the eyes of the undergrads and show them how racism is still alive, how capitalism works to exploit, how history has been subject, to make them question it all. To know that you are doing a profession that you would love to do if "the revolution" ever came about. It's all crap. Undergraduate students are like the rest of the world - they know about capitalism, they know about racism, but they don't give a shit - what are they going to do about it? what is the teacher going to do about it? Is telling/teaching enough? For many graduate students, that's the belief...and well, it's crap...

I think the only solution is for people to really recognize that a PhD is a license to a $35,000 a year job, a career where you pump out scholarship that has no impact on day to day life, and will most likely live somewhere you hate...or at the very least, will feel superior to those who are from that area...

so basically hes an idiot

his ennui is really boring

yeah, once I got to that entry I realized he could have just been any jerk I went to college with

Yeah, I could understand becoming disillusioned with academia/intellectualism if I went on to write a toxic, extremely lazy raceblog that subsequently dwarfed all my serious work. (in terms of readership, amount of debate provoked, etc.)

Makes you wonder how good his serious work was.

'caring about shit is lame maaaan'

the wind in my heaaaaart

the dust in my haaaand

maaaaaaaaaax

compare and contrast: http://www.aspentimes.com/article/2008198091324

I saw that on an automotive board where a couple promise keeper type dudes were like "I'm totally with this guy, except for the strip club part" and I'm like "lol you can't drill no oil well."

I think it's funny.

lol, upper-middle class Americans.

White Subway map making me LOL because I tried to use google streetview on my last two apartments and the only Bklyn streets so far photographed pretty much follow that map. Maybe they only put you on streetview in proportion to the number of mac users in yr hood?

I don't thikn Crown Heights quite qualifies.

When Al Sharpton comes on TV, leading some rally for reparations for slavery or some such nonsense, he bites his tongue and he remembers.

remembers waht?

definitely read that link as "aspietimes.com"

http://www.latimes.com/news/opinion/la-oe-rodriguez25feb25,0,1952462.column

I'm still lolling at are you against cheap LOLs? I myself cannot afford the high-minded LOLs as I spent all my money on this delicious sandwich

But he's doing so in a brave new world in which we're all becoming minorities, and nobody's really sure who's going to have the last laugh.

^^ what does this mean

http://www.latimes.com/media/thumbnails/columnist/2005-11/20390559.jpghttp://www.latimes.com/media/thumbnails/columnist/2005-11/20390559.jpg
http://www.latimes.com/media/thumbnails/columnist/2005-11/20390559.jpg

http://www.latimes.com/media/thumbnails/columnist/2005-11/20390559.jpghttp://www.latimes.com/media/thumbnails/columnist/2005-11/20390559.jpghttp://www.latimes.com/media/thumbnails/columnist/2005-11/20390559.jpg

We get it-you like the picture.

Bodrick III:that picture::Bill Magill:prostitutes

stuff white teeth like

Sweet call dude. You taking a break from googling nude pics of the Ultimate Warrior?

xpost

lol white subway map phew i just barely made it on there!

I have never lived on white subway map in my 5 years in NY city limits. Publishing salary.

We get it-you like the picture.

-- Bill Magill, Tuesday, 26 February 2008 22:00

ALL white people like that picture. It's a thing we have, like expensive sandwiches or Radiohead.

Guy behind the blog was on NPR today.

http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=33372288

"ALL white people like that picture. It's a thing we have, like expensive sandwiches or Radiohead."

I'm white and I find it just mediocre.

lol my local pbs staion, tpt2, is showing a clash documentary for pledge drive

I think a lot of you are selling this stuff short. It IS genuinely funny and I am on the side of a large swath of the interwebs on that so nahh. While some of it is obviously reactionary, it doesn't have the conservative anti-liberal slant a lot of you pretend it does. At the very least, reading the entries on "diversity" I.E. diversity to white people = neato "ethnic" restaurants; White men's fetishization of Asian Women, non-threatening "black friends", "Being an expert on YOUR culture", "80's night" "the last time that pop music wasn’t infused with hip-hop or R n’ B stylings.", "Being the only white person around", "Gentrification", and Sarah Silverman's "politically incorrect" humor shows that he quite obviously isn't working from an orthodox conservative perspective that just thinks recycling is lame. In many ways he works from the exact opposite perspective.

The rest of the site is a mixture of poking gentle fun at some funny things white people do "standing still at concerts" "the outdoors" "home renovations" from a genuinely loving perspective, and skewering a lot of the behaviors of white bougoise culture from a class based perspective that is a lot more bitter. The class based rather than politically based (as some bitter readers pretend) antagonism of the posts is also pretty obvious. Much of the stuff he's riffing on I.E. "designer furniture", "kitchen gadgets", "Asian Fusion Food", "Indie Music" "Gifted Schools" "an astounding 100% of white kids are gifted! Isn’t that amazing?" have no obvious progressive-conservative political corollary. When he does riff on 'progressive' things, like Prius driving, "Alternative Medicine" , Recycling, Non Profits etc, it's as they are aspects of the white bougoise culture. The only judgment values he submits for these things is to ponder A: whether there is measured difference between the degree to which these actions make bougoise white people feel good about themselves, fulfill their savior complexes, and the positive impact the actions actually have B: Propose the idea that bougoise whites gain a utility from these actions that isn't altogether altruistic, and C: Deal with the improbable yet scary proposition that bougoise whites commitment to these values might be shallower than they let on.

It's essentially a Veblenian critique of the modern urbane class with added features supposing to argue that those 'progressive' features that one doesn't classically associate with the leisure class have Veblenian aspects as well. I don't know whether he's right or not, but the idea that he's some modern coastal PJ O'Rourke making "LOLvegan" jokes may be more comforting, but it quite obviously isn't true.

The best part of the site is not the entries but the comments by people of color in the comment boxes.

Stuff white people like: 400 word posts that I don't read

Ah ha ha, it's true, it's true! We're so lame!

I used a fork instead of chopsticks at lunch today!

I laughed pretty hard at #4- assists (well, the title, anyway. I know I like assists!)

Agree with what appears to be Dustin's basic sentiment. The blog isn't conservative, it's about not being liberal enough.

the blog is about shooting fish in a barrel

"assists" is pretty funny though

"Being An Expert About YOUR Culture" is also pretty funny.

#75 Threatening to Move to Canada

ohsnap

In the middle of a semi-serious argument with my white-person roommate about whether expensive biodegradable trash bags would make fuck-all of a difference to the environment, I made her read the entry about recycling. She stormed away in a fit of self-recognition.

Wow good thing you showed her, otherwise you might have done some small but useful thing for teh envarnment.

I'm not sure what good biod. bags do once they're in a landfill where nothing is supposed to get oxygen or break down, so y'know, whatevs, but why be a jerk?

because only white people are nice to other people

If you are in a situation where a white person produces an empty bottle, watch their actions. They will first say “where’s the recycling?” If you say “we don’t recycle,” prepare for some awkwardness. They will make a move to throw the bottle away, they will hesitate, and then ultimately throw the bottle away. But after they return look in their eyes. All they can see is the bottle lasting forever in a landfill, trapping small animals. It will eat at them for days, at this point you should say “I’m just kidding, the recycling is under the sink. Can you fish out that bottle?” And they will do it 100% of the time!

I'm not particularly proud of myself, but I think that at times people think that six-bucks-for-twelve trashbags that are made of corn are a lot more useful than they actually are, which is basically what this blog is about.

100 safe heroes for people who enjoy stereotyping the culture consumption of others and then rolling their eyes about how tiresome and predictable it is

^^^^ this is much better than that guy's blog ok?

uh, no

I mean, I'm clearly way more into self-satisfied "Look, we're the funniest fuckers alive!" than anyone on this board besides Hoos and it's pretty apparent to me that that thread is incredibly boring.

That thread could have been classic, never quite got off the ground.

Yes but with the exception of Varg Vikernes, I don't recognize anyone on that thread. And I only know who he is from ILX last week. xxxp

I just think saying "Thorstein Veblen" to the tune of DP's "Teachers" is fun, ok?

Tombot finds absurdist list humor far more rewarding than white urbanite seinfeld bloggery - what's up with that? Find out on Hardball with Chris Matthews, tonight on MSNBC

SWPL: MSNBC

I liked this:

Water seems like a fairly simple concept. You turn on the tap, put glass underneath, and drink. Sadly, it is not this simple for white people.

On the whole, they are unable to put a glass under a tap and just drink. In fact, this is such a strange concept that the city of New York had to launch a rather large PR campaign to show white people that it was possible to actually drink the water that comes out of the tap!

#11 Asian Girls

Should white guy / asian girl marry, they produce hybrids that are atheistically pleasing, but are very annoying. This practice is also a means by which white people can catch up to the asian peoples in the population race, as most of the hybrids often act white rather than asian.

"annoying"

atheistically? Ye gods!

no, no gods

truth bomb

as most of the hybrids often act white rather than asian.

makes me think they are petroleum/fuel-cell powered

we are

hence the nascar fetish for unadulterated high octane kineticism obv

felicity you sound butthurt, this site is HILARIOUS

jk i'll stop being a jerk about this now

Is that an April Fool's joke? I LOVE it!

priuses in a dodge charger world

im actually one of this 'humor' site's fervent haters, i was being sarcastic

we got it, thx

wow, i sound bitchy. maybe it is because i am a half-caste colombian

i thought felicity didnt so it required further clarification

oh man the police version of the charger is a beast y'all
michigan staties get to ride in style!!

smokey and the bandit steez

oh that is fucking cool:

http://www.nhtroopers.org/images/lopro%20charger.jpg

I know!! look at that shit!

SWPL: mean lookin' bad-ass vehicles

the best part about going to see my ex's folks was driving through michigan. the speed limit is 85 and that's pretty much just a suggestion. remembering that you're barreling toward the indiana border at 105 mph was always a challenge though.

Cops should drive around in cars that are painted with rainbows and smiley faces.

fire island p.d.?

deej, is any of it funny to you? I think I hate the site more and more because it could have been funny but he's polluted it with such incoherent and cretinous rage that it just comes off as pissy and dimwitted.

yeah its overly bitter. thats only allowed on ilx

It is funny that it is so atheistically pleasing yet full of errors:

#30 Wrigley Field

So for the upcoming season, try to know at least one player on the Chicago Cubs and defend Mark Prior at all costs

* * * *

So if you find it difficult to befriend white people, it doesn’t help to know a little something about the Cubs and to suggest a trip to Wrigley Field.

He went too far:

http://stuffwhitepeoplelike.wordpress.com/2008/03/09/85-the-wire/#comment-19477

that was really unfunny

stuff white people like: feeding trolls

fuck all of you

If there is anything I've learned from trying to become an alcoholic it's that I can never drink enough that the overwhelming majority's concepts will ever seem remotely conscienable

white ppl

if there's one thing i've learned from trying to be an alcholic is that however i parse it, will never be part of any overwhelming majority

haw D- haw haw

that site really does suck. I disliked it the minute I saw it, but I am glad that sensible and thoughtful folk on this thread have helped me see how bad it really is. 'The Wire', wtf is that anyway?

#86: The Wire MAGAZINE

White people love sandwiches! Elsewhere in the world, people eat meat by itself, or with rice. But white people feel the need to go the extra step by slicing the meat thinly, spread a "condiment" on it, and put it between two slices of bread. You might find a white person eating a sandwich in his car or while riding mass transit. If you really want to score points with a white person, ask if he'd like to get sandwiches and hang out in the park

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v134/tracerhand/SLEEVES.jpg

Vinyl record sleeves with 2-sided insert featuring
faux-academic material on pop music and the state of the
record industry, seeded with promotional material for
indie radio stations. Sponsored by Brown Student Radio.
Snuck onto used & new record store shelves. 140 Copies Total.

"This blog says white people like stuff that I don't like, even though I am also white. Therefore it is not funny."

Half the fun of this blog is in the way it provokes defensiveness and borderline racism from outraged drips. Next week's entry: oxygen.

Half the fun of this blog is in the way it provokes defensiveness and borderline racism from outraged drips. Next week's entry: oxygen.

-- Bodrick III Nude Spock, Monday, March 17, 2008 2:31 PM (22 minutes ago) Bookmark Link

You really need to read the comments on that blog, mate. A lot of the time it isn't even borderline.

max r is not nude spock

ASK BODRICK III

I like saying his name like that one mont- never mind....

Those sleeves look like Spiritualized singles

http://www.tnr.com/politics/story.html?id=49eb53ed-afbc-4aae-bf17-6ffc44f40a48&k=6761

But if this blog is such a piquant satire of white liberal cultural mores and hypocrisies, then why do so many white people like Stuff White People Like? I imagine the most common reaction among its readers is summed up by one rhapsodic commenter: "Oh, lord, it only hurts because it's true!" And that's the problem. The reason the phrase "it's funny because it's true" has become a shorthand for things that are neither (a) funny nor (b) particularly true is because humor is rarely truly satirical when its targets also make up the bulk of its audience. Or, if it is, the audience doesn't tend to find it funny. Think Colbert skewering Bush at the White House press corps dinner. I don't remember Dick Cheney slapping his knee and shouting "Oh lord it only hurts because it's true!" Instead, with this brand of comedy, the goal is to comfort, rather than challenge or disturb, the audience. (Other things widely known to be funny-because-they're-true: Britney Spears is a bad mom; cats are standoffish, while dogs are blindly loyal; women love shopping, while men can't get enough sex. Are you with me? The ladies know what I'm talking about!)

and it's deep, too!

some white people are so lame

http://stuffeducatedblackpeoplelike.wordpress.com/

I do not like a lot of this stuff! I am not offended! I have a sense of humor!!

http://stuffghettopeoplelike.wordpress.com/

my sister loves those slippers! we do re-use cooking grease! I am not offended!

Haha, when the guy who coined the term "grups" disses SWPL, you know you're in trouble...

oh man.

http://stuffghettopeoplelike.files.wordpress.com/2008/03/cropped-watermelon.jpg

A tragic end to what looks to have been a fine picnic.

actually that is kind of offensive.

but if I take it as some big postmodern racial humor thing than I can laugh at... but it's so overt I can see why people would be offended. It's like Sarah Silverman's comedy.

"stuff ghetto people like" seems a lot more malaicious than the SWPL and SEBPL

because liberal educmacation told u so

It's not very 'funny', though, is it?

That picture is pretty damn funny.

The writing has the same problem as the other blogs like this -- completely tone-deaf.

it's pretty damn obviously photoshopped

well no shit

Yeah, that would have been a bit much.

i lik sex and i lik to work us actor in sex

Uh...

"White People" is only the latest Web phenomenon to result in a major book deal. Earlier this month, the person behind http://barackobamaisyournewbicycle.com signed a contract with Gotham Books, and before that, so did the person who runs LOLcat emporium I Can Haz Cheeseburger. As it happens, Gotham was also the publisher on The Truth About Chuck Norris, "an illustrated book of 400 farcical 'facts' about movie star Chuck Norris... based on the popular internet meme."

The ever growing Barnes-and-Noble-Checkout-Line-Impulse-Buy industry

The Urban Outfitters Library of America

books to fill the front room of Powell's

http://www.theroot.com/id/45371

Of all the responses, I think this early one is the whitest:

OMG this website will be indispensable in my fantasy dissertation about how "white culture" gets defined. Seriously, I have been wanting to write this for 8 years now.

-- jaymc, Friday, February 15, 2008 4:14 PM (4 months ago) Bookmark Link

New Salon interivew with the guy who did the site. Pretty funny. I think it's good satire; the "conservative in sheeps clothing" theories going on above are very . . . white.

http://www.salon.com/mwt/feature/2008/07/05/white_people/

http://www.foxnews.com/halfhournewshour/index.html

too bad this got cancelled i think this dude coulda been a great writer on there

http://www.foxnews.com/ucat/images/114969_320_vid_092407_hhnh_times.jpg

^^encompasses my reaction to this thread

lol @ revive

Williamsburg people: The L-train tunnel between 1st Avenue and Bedford Avenue
hymen restoration in Europe
"Conscious" Hip Hop Fallacy

based on those threads i think thirdalternative would be a great addition to the writing staff at "http://stuffwhitepeoplelike.wordpress.com/";

and what, max, et. al.

you're just pissed because this guy's got your number.

I doubt you'd say a word about a site that satirized hedge fund, striped shirt kind of dudes.

Hipster girls wish they were lesbians.

-- thirdalternative, Wednesday, May 7, 2008 4:25 PM (1 month ago) Bookmark Link

^^ its this kind of cutting satire that i think would fit in well at this fine blog

You gotta admit they have that pseudo-lesbian, Smith/Oberlin faux-bian thing down pat.

thirdalternative you need to meet my friend burt_stanton, i think youd have a lot to talk about

this argument is so white

max, you need to develop a sense of humor about youself.

Daddy's bar in Williamsburg. No buy backs, a snobby crowd devoid of any sexual energy whatsoever (hipsters are afraid of adult sexuality, you can tell by the way they call each other "kids" and play childhood games like kickball), and bartenders who act very inconvenienced if you order the hot dogs they offer.

-- thirdalternative, Wednesday, May 7, 2008 1:30 PM (1 month ago) Bookmark Link

^^ great post

youre not married to a columbian woman by any chance, are you?

1) Thanks!

2) No.

Do you work at Daddy's?

I run a hedge fund and I resent the suggestion that I wear stripey shirts.

Max you are quite the bad ass with that search function.

Hurting: do you 1) use cocaine 2) eat bufflao wings

and have you 3) ever attended a party that employed an ice luge?
.

http://www.chrisflecker.com/ImpactPlayer.jpg

http://www.michiganice.com/gallery/liquorluge/full/001.jpg

bufflmao wings

ew

ice loluge

Stuff White People Like is pretty much funny and true. Or "spot on" as our faggy British counterparts would say.

http://991.com/newGallery/George-Michael-Ladies--Gentlemen-350188.jpg

George Michael treats men like objects.

max, you need to develop a sense of humor about youself.

-- thirdalternative, Sunday, 6 July 2008 22:03 (28 minutes ago) Bookmark Link

The pot calling the banana black?

you like deep banana blackout?

I'm flattered but I've got a girlfriend.

I thought white people said "partner."

http://www.lovefilm.com/lovefilm/images/products/4/65204-large.jpg

WOW 22 bucks for a metal flask that says "I AM NOT PLASTIC"
oh, and this blog is stupid.

also there's constantly typos in it. not trying to be all white about it but if you're trying to sell a book of posts to typo-hating whites maybe try and not have typos in your posts.

do hipsters play kickball? that is retarded

buffalo wings are better than stuff white ppl like

Hurting: do you 1) use cocaine 2) eat bufflao wings

and have you 3) ever attended a party that employed an ice luge?
.

-- thirdalternative, Sunday, July 6, 2008 6:07 PM (1 hour ago) Bookmark Link

lol clueless prole

do hipsters play kickball? that is retarded

When I think of all the things people (hipsters and otherwise) do that could be seen as stupid, playing kickball is a million miles behind so much other shit.

Hand, I heard about you, and your girlfriend. Don't you live in like France or somewhere like that now anyway?

When I think of all the things people (hipsters and otherwise) do that could be seen as stupid, playing kickball is a million miles behind so much other shit.

-- Charlie Rose Nylund, Monday, July 7, 2008 1:38 AM (53 minutes ago) Bookmark Link

Don't be so sure:

http://sugarzine.com/webdocs/site_04.07/pics/kickball.jpg

what's wrong with an ice luge?

Maybe the luge upsets him because it reminds him of the claustrophobia from the L train between Bedford and First Avenue.

i never thought i'd click on this thread and see a pic from the little rock kickball league. wow. i actually know who that dude in green tights is. and he's no hipster. he is, however, a "theater type."

zach galifianakis?

At least the Katy Perry song ends after a few minutes?

Charlie Rose Nylund is so constantly off the mark he wins the official Burt_Stanton Off the Mark Award 2008.

<a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Bcmw0ufHoBo";>Just for you</a>, Burt. Just for you.

Oh, FUCK off -- I hit the BBCode convert button!

Knowing the words up to "I get stupid, I mean outrageous" is standard and unremarkable. Knowing everything up through the hook means you’ll be frenching at 80s Night.

I have a really awkward reputation for being the girl who can do every damn syllable of It Takes Two, eep! I'm even whiter than I thought!

Speaking of playing kickball...

http://i267.photobucket.com/albums/ii317/RabitesAngelatin/sasquachrainbowbaby.jpg

Homeless man in above photo has what can only be described as Perfect Form and refers to himself as Sasquatch Rainbowbaby.

i like the boys on the fence, that's who i'd be chillin with

Went to Terrastock with the one on the left.

Like sewing? You're a hipster!
Like seeing live music? You're a hipster!
Like bicycles? You're a hipster!
Like fashion? You're a hipster!

See, the thing is that all of that is true.

Tracer Hand, don't you live in like France or somewhere?

damn hipters and their kickball and skinnyt jeans. what's next after skinny jeans anyway, regular fit? back to baggy?