Big Brother 2008 (UK) Thread 1: Low Life?

Without Dermot, I don't see the point. Dude anchored the whole experience.

Alison wasn't first off.

"interesting but normal people"

I think the difference was that the housemates earlier this year were people who had a lot to lose by acting like twunts. Normal BB is people who have no talent and have to resort to twuntishness to get a tiny amount of fame. Really, WTF has Brian done since the end of the last series? Rhetorical question, I don't actually care.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Big_Brother_2008_%28UK%29

Many of the walls are padded

That'll be useful, for when they start bouncing off them...

I might not bother watching this one.

I might not bother watching this one.

-- Matt DC, Monday, 2 June 2008 21:17 (2 minutes ago) Bookmark Link

mfkn real talk

of which we all partake...

George Lamb presenting BBLB. Great.

They really need to stop wheeling out Nikki and Spiral all the time.

How did I miss this: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vVS4CPXXmyA

????

lol I didn't even recognize her

Christ.

'er indoors: 'GOD.'

someone told me dawn just lost another "i'm not smelly" lawsuit against endemol recently.

Chanelle's single - "I Want It", Charley's single - "I Want It More"

http://www.digitalspy.co.uk/music/a97394/bb-charley-i-might-be-the-new-mariah.html

an "R&B hip-hop" single (...) which would have a "funky house electro" remix.

Covering all the bases there...

"Who knows, next year I might be Mariah Carey with a bit of luck."

If by that she means "a cokehead with no grasp of reality, a very short fuse temper and blatantly fake breasts who looks like a drag queen", then she's probably already there.

Why is it that ALL the girls on UK BB are sluts?

(Please, no obvious answers.)

to an obvious question?

If possible!

I think that most of the BB contestants - both boys and girls - are subconsciously going for that Loaded/Maxim/GQ/etc. "lads" vote, based on a (mis)perception that most of the BB audience are a bit thick. Real lowest common denominator stuff. It's got worse in the last few years, "lad's lad" Anthony winning in 2005 being the tipping point that informed the strategies of future contestants from that point on. Actually I don't think that either Pete or Brian fell naturally into that "lads" category, but it was something they both played up to.

Is Anthony always in the lads mags? I don't know...

I would guess that a large amount of the auditionees for BB are the 'fame! followed by TV presenting work plz!" wannabeez of which the producers could either wheedle them out or pick a representative.

It does seem to be a ticket to Heat magazines "star spot" page for ever, well beyond the 'can't remember them now' stage.

Anthony is more the kind of bloke lads would have a drink with in a pub while reading a lad's mag which had pictures of Chanelle/Charley/whoever in it.
In last year's "Big Brother's Big Brain", one of the psychologists was explaining that they actually made a point of telling the wannabees that BB wasn't a ticket to fame and fortune, but the wannabees eyes would just glaze over and they'd hear whatever they wanted to hear.

Nadia's cash-in single wasn't all that bad, if I remember, but it didn't exactly do their ongoing fame any favours.

Why is it that ALL the girls on UK BB are sluts?

-- King Boy Pato, Thursday, 5 June 2008 00:22 (7 hours ago) Bookmark Link

Like the Australian one is any different.

i didn't watch it last year after racistgate and didn't miss it.

definitely not watching it this year.

One housemate has had a breast enlargement, apparently.

Like the Australian one is any different.

Only THREE of them will probably end up in Zoo Magazine this year!!

It's still going??

The Daily Star has it there's a blind man, a 44 yr old, a mother who will 'miss her kids', um someone with a boob job, and some people.

Blind dude ftw.

What does The Independent say?

that Bush is taking over Iraq and imposing immunity for US contractors

Brilliant.

O FFS Please give it a rest. Who in the UK hasn't been in the Big Brother house already?

If anyone is planning to watch the 'direct' feed later on tonight, you'd do well to watch the episode of King Of The Hill on just before it - it's a great episode, where Hank forgets to mail the house insurance.

MTV's 'exclusive':

Big Brother 9 starts tonight and MTV can exclusively reveal some clues to the contestants identities...

One Housemate does stand-up comedy
One Housemate has been deported from America
One Housemate is a DJ
One Housemate is a Buddhist
One Housemate is Muslim
One Housemate wears a watch worth £13,000
Three Housemates have children
Three Housemates were born outside the UK
One Housemate has appeared in a film with Hugh Grant
One Housemate has had a breast enlargement
One Housemate has never watched Big Brother
The eldest Housemate is 42.

So, basically, one housemate is a stand-up mother of three who has kids, is a buddhist who got deported from america as she had a cat stevens cassette, has an expensive watch, knows HGrant, and is too busy DJing to watch Big Brother.

Jenny Eclair, come on down!

IT'S ON NOW, MOFUGHGAHS

*self-satisfied shrug*

Isn't the room with the padded walls where Charley was freaking out during the S&M party last year?

Good house/bad house looks shit. Zero tolerance looks shit.

Now it's time to meet the dregs of humanity.

Luke = Rik from The Young Ones crossed with Gareth from The Office...

lol at this one

sike -- not actually watching

Bah - neither am I now. Crappy contrived first task.

Crappy task with potential for big lulz. The fat-faced Joey out of Friends dude is well into role-playing, maybe cos him and his Mrs give off major swingers vibes.

i'm currently watching Heroes instead.
i'm sure i'll pick up the pieces later on.
or will i be strong and resist this crap for once ?
i would like to believe so, but the truth is i'll probably succumb.

my god this guy -- wotta dick

SHE IS LIKE CHARLOTTE FROM SEX IN A CITY

Seriously, I'm not gonna watch this.

I mean, there's repeats of Dragons' Den on Dave. I'm watching that.

It's the Levi Roots episode!

GIMME DAT REGGAE REGGAE SAUCE

HOT REGGAE REGGAE SAUCE

SO NICE WITH YOUR FRIED CHICKEN
MAKE BURGERS FINGER-LICKING

They repeat that Levi Roots ep all the fucking time.

Seriously this year peeps I'm gonna drink a lot and go with the whole BB experience. It's more or less the only way I'm'a talk to mrs V for the next 2 months.

It's either that or revitalise ILM with New Music threads.

BTW y'all are correct the formula is creaking like a motherfucker.

Another Charley, another Anthony another everyone who has appeared in the house before + a blind man. Forget this.

Have just turned over having been watching House. Are they all insufferable cocks? They seem to be so on first impressions (have seen since blind dude went in)

xpost, ah, that'd be the answer I was expecting.

Saw a stupidly attractive but quite bitchy seeming girl (who will probably have a 'journey' of some kind) and the gayest person in Europe. Turned off telly.

The schtick for umpteen years has been that they're all insufferable cocks, and then gradually some of them will be revealed to be quite sufferable cocks. Borderline-aspie Toryboy (aka Orville) seems to sweet and innocent to be hateful, Mohammed seems okay, the chef dude might turn out to be complex, fat-faced Joey is kinda bearable in current company.

The gay dancer has a Dom Joly-esque pugnacious charm, too.

Oh good, racist pro-life veggie, cheers Channel 4.

OK, this one is the worst one ever. Poor Darnell, his introductions were oddly reminiscent of Bonner a couple of years ago - "daniel? donald?"

worst one = racist pro-life veggie bad-girl, obviously.

Until this one showed up. I will want to kill her within three minutes.

bonkers screaming "wacky" one

SO! MUCH! SCREAMING!

That last one was cute!

I'm feeling weirdly benign, think its cos I'm near the end of a long week.

Cute but VERY VERY ANNOYING! SCREEEEEEEEE! WHEEEEEEEEEEE! COOKIES!!!!!!!

I don't know if it's subtle or stupid the way they do this thing where the woman who will be mocked and sneered at by so many of her fellow womens will clearly be the infinitely superior human being.

I am mocking and sneering at all of them, based on first impressions. I don't expect much in the way of superiority in return.

Reading old BB threads shows I am generally terrible at judging straight off though.

Didn't mean it like that. I meant all the princesses in the house and their attichooooooood.

SO! MUCH! SCREAMING!

the first few weeks are always like this though aren't they.
i cant stand the start of the thing.
its only later on when the screaming (HOPEFULLY!) subsides and the fame starved start to reveal their emotional turmoil that i begin to get sucked into the black void of the 9pm dead zone.

Mocking and sneering at all of them is a lot of the point, obv. But I do feel protective to the ones that are gonna get bullied.

xpost

Yeah obviously there's loads of cannon fodder early on. I'm also predicting that "Mario" and Princess Peach will get tired, bored and boring real quick, which generally seems to happen to the over 40s.

xxp 10pm this year, innit?

Reading old BB threads shows I am generally terrible at judging straight off though.

-- ailsa, Friday, 6 June 2008 07:39 (47 seconds ago) Bookmark Link

This. In 2006 I hated everyone until it got going.

I liked Nikki Grahame!

They are going to make Fat Joey and bimbette get married on Sunday. I predict a laff-fest. Or a breakdown. Or a really shit idea being made to look really shit.

that's OMG I liked her straight off, what was I thinking, in case that wasn't clear. was meant to be indicative of my terrible first impressions.

Orville is going to have given the game away by then tho, he is the least capable of putting any sort of front on in the house, I think.

I think there are more of them this year that seem likeable enough from the off than the last few years. This could be totally a mood thang tho.

(xpost) but his general level of awkwardness is so high that he might get away with it.

Who is Orville? Is he the dork in the suit?

Seriously this year peeps I'm gonna drink a lot and go with the whole BB experience

that's probably the only way i'll be able to bear it this year -- ie reading what a rollingly drunken NV has to say about it. i can't bring myself to actually watch it, tanked up or not. i flicked on the TV when i got in from work and davina was trying to be excited about the housemates (this was about half an hour ago) ... they all looked like total dobbers, so i flicked it off again.

and GEORGE FUCKING LAMB: woah, jesus. why?

Ah, luckily I very rarely watch the spin-offs. I'm only flesh and blood.

Mario's been on telly before but I can't think what it was he was in.

FRIENDS

Extra in Eastenders? Swingers documentary?

Or some Channel 4 docu on swingers.

lol snap

World's Worst Sly Stallone Impersonators?

http://xlvector.googlepages.com/JoeyTribbiani.jpg

"Don't tell anyone me real name's Kev, arright?"

People "Mario" looks more like than Sly Stallone

http://clearerchannel.org/upload/files/video/1163/mt_jpg.jpg

His mrs, meanwhile, is like some bizarre gene slice of Tamzin Outhwaite and Josie Lawrence.

Did you notice there's a Welsh Happy Shopper Jennifer Aniston, too? Thought they were gonna go for a complete set for a moment there.

Unsurprisingly, there's a thread on Digital Spy. Ant & Dec's Saturday Night Takeaway being the most popular answer.

(Noodle, Mark Thomas was also on the Apprentice this year calling himself Simon Smith)

http://www.bbc.co.uk/apprentice/images/people/big_SimonSmith.jpg http://www.pbjmgt.co.uk/clients/dom_joly/Image2_DomJoly.jpg

I had to goodle Simon Smith but I remember him from the one ep I saw.

also on "Brits Behind Bars"

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IRC-CB9SxVI&feature=related

possibly also a contestant on Duel and maybe Deal or No Deal

xpost, no, he was very definitely more Mark Thomas.

I'm starting to work out this whole continuum tho that goes thru Dom Joly, Joey-out-of-Friends and Mark Thomas and winds up at a self-deluding Sly Stallone-not-alike crypto-swinger.

So I'm assuming this isn't worth watching then? Seriously this is the least populated first night thread I've seen since 2004.

Now's the time to get onboard while all the fairweather fans have given up the ghost after a mere 8 years. I have good feeling.

It also features Christopher Ecclestone's son as a besuited Toryboy virgin who may or may not be going on a journey of self-discovery. (Clue: not).

Did you just make that up as something that might entice me on board? If so I'm faintly terrified. If not I'm... faintly terrified.

http://img373.imageshack.us/img373/7748/luke440x227yw2.jpg http://img266.imageshack.us/img266/851/11998671tz8.jpg

L-R: Ecclestone, Orville

xpost

nah I'm just freestylin' mistah.

damn, no disrespect dudes but this thread would have been at like 500 by now, two or three years ago. ilx barometer says: u fucked channel 4.

The ILX barometer never lies.

I thought maybe Deal or No Deal for Mario although if it turns out to be

Swingers documentary?

-- snoball, Thursday, 5 June 2008 22:55 (Thursday, 5 June 2008 22:55) Bookmark Link

Or some Channel 4 docu on swingers.

-- Noodle Vague,

you'll all be like "lol gerry watches swingers shows!" :(

I had you down as a "Brits Behind Bars" kind of a guy

Comes to the same thing, doesn't it?

A quick search for a Deal or No Deal forum doesn't show anyone recognising Mario.

^ the saddest thing I have posted on here for quite some time

Come to Horlicks Country

http://www.bloom-design.com/images/horlicks01.jpg

I'm off work next week so I bet I get dragged into watching this. The only launch night I've ever seen was last year. It was pretty insufferable.

-- Annie (From Norway)

kudos

Haha yesterday I was wondering if Horlicks still existed.

Last year's was insufferable full stop. I can only remember two of the contestants.

The student lad "looks like Justin Timberlake"

Actually, I can see it. If JTimb had eaten no pies ever.

Actually, for the 'different g/f' task, whenthe real g/f was indicating with hand signals "you mean, me and *him* also?" and his later "wot, and I have to be the baby?"

He's gonna be OK.

Actually, apart from some "work it girlfren" usuals who will end up invisible, they seem generally an OK bunch.

Lisa & Mario - massive swingers vibe, accused of being doggers on BBBM later on. Lol@Davina trying to work up "OOOH SHE'S REALLY ANNOYED DID YOU SEE HER FACE!!1!!" when she actually looked like she couldn't give a toss. She looks a bit like Catharine O'Hara. Will fail the secret task and be the first out (assuming they count as a pair).

Luke - bastard grandson of Geroge Formby. Will stay in all the way through and come second or third, at which point everyone will scratch their heads and wonder who he was or what he did in the house.

Steph - will be nominated by everyone for her part in the first secret task and go in week 2. Will have her tits out in Nuts before anyone gets their tits out in the house. Dialogue thus far has comprised "Ohmigod", "it's mad" and "yeah".

Dale - total cock but will do an ANFERNEE and win. (Speaking of him, he was on the 'Project' show and they couldn't even trust him to do dialogue, he's that useless) Will have a massive falling out with Dennis, who may turn out to be his CRAIG but will actually try to wank him off. Dale may let him, then punch him for trying to make out he was gay.

Rachel - far too nice for the show. Will fall out with Rebecca over who speaks the most and leave through the back door, having not been able to get a word in in week 6.

Dennis - thinks he's Jake from the Scissor Sisters, is actually Christopher Biggins. Will cry before June is out, and be evicted a couple of weeks later. SERIOUSLY BB, WTF IS UP WITH EVERYBODY FROM SCOTLAND BEING WEIRDOS.

Sylvia - will not deliver on any of her promises to shake things up or whatever and will be this year's VANESSA. Will make the last week, probably, but go midweek eviction.

Mikey - SERIOUSLY BB, WTF IS UP WITH EVERYBODY FROM SCOTLAND BEING WEIRDOS. OK, the guy's blind but he has the personality of Jim Davison. Will do an impression of Darnelle/Daniel/Donald thinking he actually is black and be thrown out for racism.

Rebecca - EEEEEEEEEEK! EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEK! FOR COV! EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEK! That's all you're going to hear until she's evicted in week 7 or 8, having survived every eviction before then despite being nominated by everyone. Or she'll be like LAURA.

Rex - a dark horse, Rex. Will get to the end of the series without being nominated by anyone, at which point he will get 0% of the public vote. Housemates will believe his stories are like NAUGHTY NICK'S and not believe any of them.

Alexandra - will leave under her own steam early doors, having realised what she's done. Savvy enough to make as much money as she thinks she wants from good magazine deals rather than titsoot ladmags, and will do this well.

Darnell/Daniel/Donald - astonishingly, will turn out to be the shallowest of all this year's crop. Will have nothing to talk to anybody about and will drift out in the middle after a fight over the food budget.

Jennifer - wants to be the Tweedy so much, therefore unsurprising she doesn't like picaninnies. Will be heavily nominated from the start due to trying to lecture everyone over her teenage Mail reader moralising, which she will conveniently forget when Zoo pay her money to take all her clothes of and complain about how she was bullied in the house. Her daughter will be dead proud of her then.

Mohammed - will be utterly nondescript. Convinced he is funny, will realise he isn't and be told to button it by Dale in week2 , leading to a bust up that involves a formal warning.

Kat - will annoy everyone intensely after the first day. Will consistently be supported by the public because SHE'S SO WACKY and because the other HMs deserve her. Runner-up.

heck! (takes hat off!)

All that.

Think you're wrong about Orville, think he's going to be annoying the fuck out of housemates after 2 days. Hooray.

Not even the Great British Public (Voting for Big Brother Division) will let Dale win this, the utter piece of shit. Due to get a bit rapey by next Wednesday, methinks.

Dennis is on some next level shit and I kinda like it.

Cock on about Mikey tho, he has a fantastic talent for not giving a fuck what he says to anybody. They can't throw him out tho cos of his oh so brave disabilitiness.

Rebecca. Just go, love. This can't end well.

Rex might turn out to be alright, for a fucking Public School badboy. Or he might be a cock. Who can tell?

Darnelle probably getting a bit rapey round about now.

I like Mo. I'm saying that right now.

I also like Kat. This ought to change by sometime in week 2.

I can't tell any of the "I GOT SO MUCH ACHICHOOOOD DON'T MESS WITH ME I'LL FUCK UP ANYBODY WHO GETS IN MY WAY. oh yeah, praise be to Jebus/Allah." aggrogirls apart yet. This prolly willn't change.

Sorry, In my Mikey thing I gave the impression Donald isn't actually black, which of course he is, but Mikey will come out with some shite about reggae and go WO AM DAT WATEY MELON? inna BlackAdder stylee but mean it.

Alexandra got the biggest boo going in, but actually was the only one trying to help Rebecca calm down after most everyone else had run off away from her.

Dale's not a winner. This early on, Mario seems the most likeable / easy tempered.

Hard to pick winners. Easy to pick no-chancers.

Here goes for the no chancers...

Steph (even if she turns out to have MMessenger niceness)
Dale
Rachel - far too nice for the show
Dennis - cue psychodrama: Everyone that goes in saying how strong a character they are.....
Sylvia
Rebecca
Rex
Alexandra

Yeah, everyone Mikey met last night he was like "WHERE ARE YOU FROM? JUST LET ME SHOUT SOMETHING CRASS AND STEREOTYPICAL ABOUT THAT THEN PAL"

Jennifer. Hmm. My feeling is she was edited really 'badly'...

hates "illegal immigrants" i.e. not 'legal' ones, OK?

also hates "abortion" FFS! NO-ONE LIKES IT!!!

dislikeable more for the idea that her opinions are worth owt ("If my opinions change anyone elses out there..." SNGH!)

hates "illegal immigrants" i.e. not 'legal' ones, OK?

I think she'll trip over if someone saying "asylum seeker" as her Daily Mail Mind will automatically insert "bogus" before it.

I'm sure you're right.

She's the first one (Since that fat chef a few years ago) I felt I'd seen before, but she's from the North East so it's possible.

Talking of Rapey, Rapey Paul Dannan was on BBBM last night and Dale seems to be his favourite.

Rape recognise rape

He recently presented a British Television series entitled Test drive my Girlfriend on ITV2.[5] In the show he acts as a modern-day Cupid and dates the girls first.

Missed this show. Intriguing reading of Roman mythology.

BIG BROTHER RETURNS
"It's gone from an experiment of normal people to mad characters being played against one another"

Former contestant Pete Bennett says the show is not what it used to be

I love the DS:BB forums:

theres quite a lot of northern accents in the house this year and their accents aren't too pronounced I'm not really noticing too much that theres scottish ones in it.

All the Brit-borns went down the left side of the stairs, but Darnielle/Dawson/Donald ('merican) and Sylvia (?) (Sierra Leonean) went down the right side.

Hmm, just like driving!

Yes yes exactly.

COOKIE!!! AHHHH COOKIE!!!!

"you wan one?"
(no)
"Thannnnk yw"

(they drive on the left in Thailand btw, which is why cookie monster went down the left)

Haven't watched it yet but the podcast thing on the Channel 4 website was pretty good.

Didn't watch any of last year's apart from the first night, and didn't realise that the guy who won it was a complete obsessive compulsive Big Brother fan.

Talk already of BetFair starting an "Anybody but Mikey" book.

I hadn't realised that the reason Mario was on Brits Behind Bars for for domestic violence.

darnell was born in ipswich and mohammed, who went down the left side, was born in somalia

(not cathy)

From the tiny bit I watched Mohammed seemed like one of the nicer ones. Am I wrong?

darnell was born in ipswich and mohammed, who went down the left side, was born in somalia

(not cathy)

-- Cathy, Friday, 6 June 2008 22:35 (15 minutes ago) Bookmark Link

Yeah but he spent loads of his life in the US, and perhaps Mohammed didn't spent as much time in Somalia. I'm only speculating anyway.

Mohammed seems like a nice guy to me.

All but a couple seemed 'nice'...

About half and half at the moment, I'd say?

Most Somalis who settled here did so beginning 15 years ago.

The blind guy kinda looks the blond guy from Dumb and Dumber.

Day 3 transcript:

OH MY GOSH OH MY GOSH OH MY GOSH OH MY GOSH OH MY GOSH OH MY GOSH OH MY GOSH OH MY GOSH cookie OH MY GOSH OH MY GOSH OH MY GOSH OH MY GOSH OH MY GOSH OH MY GOSH OH MY GOSH OH MY GOSH OH MY GOSH OH MY GOSH OH MY GOSH OH MY GOSH ahhhh cookie OH MY GOSH OH MY GOSH OH MY GOSH OH MY GOSH OH MY GOSH OH MY GOSH OH MY GOSH OH MY GOSH

So the "wedding" is today, and absolutely no-one is buying it.

Does this mean that the four will be up for eviction? If so, Steph is bound to go.

If "all the others", hmm possibly one of the two new Charley's.

If the GBP vote out Orville on Friday I am going to be well unhappy.

Stephanie is absolutely vile.

Okay, I give in. I'm about to watch the housemates go in on 4od. This is a new low even for me.

Stephanie is absolutely vile.

-- Noodle Vague, Sunday, 8 June 2008 19:36 (Yesterday) Bookmark Link

That moment when they were told they were getting married and Mario said (as a joke) 'we could have kids' and she went ballistic. Either she has an unfortunate history with men or she's another Nikki, in which case I'll go in there and chuck her out myself.

LOL i didn't know this was happening until just now when i found this thread

and now i'm going to try and forget i ever did :D

OK, so the task has been taken as "failed", so up for eviction:

Mario
Lisa
Luke
Stephanie.

Oh, and according to the Sun, Alexandra is seriously dangerous.

These threads are the only link I have had to BB for the past few years! Kiu duderz.

I watched the highlights show last night (hooray for C4+1, which lets you watch the football then BB) and I can't decide whether it's great or awful. Rebecca obsessed with taking her clothes off, although people with more experience of Hen Nights than I may wish to confirm it's normal to want to strip for all the other hens. Mikey is maybe my most hated ever BB contestant, an utterly vile human being buts gets away with it because of OHSOBRAVE.

Task failed, mainly because Steph couldn't be arsed with it but I reckon the Wife Beater will get evicted.

Oh, in other news Dale's long-term girlfriend has said the entire audition process for him was a total act to see if the producers would pick someone who was that much of a cock.

Fair enough. Reset Dale's initial scores to null then.

I've got a feeling that Mikey is going to ruin this Big Brother for me. I find watching him unbearable.

I like Lisa.

She was being painted into the "oooh, look at her face! LOL" corner, but she was totally "what's the fuss, it's Big Brother for god's sake!"

Early front runner?

Oh, when people here are saying Mikey, I keep thinking of Mario. Must stop that.

Mikey mikey mikey.

That's one of those perennial Big Brother names that come around more than once now.

The Three Dogs scenario - A 'thinky' thing...

Perhaps too early to judge Mikey, but yeah, cock. He didn't once apologise for destroying Sylvia's pants.

I really don't want to assume he's used to getting away with murder because of OHSOBRAVE (a meme is born) but after this the thought keeps crossing my mind.

Alexandra may be seriously dangerous but she's definitely an attention whore, even by BB standards.

Kathreya has already created a journey for herself in the whole English language thing. Whether it's authentic or she's putting it on, viewers will latch onto this.

(also she's trying her hardest to make HEE-RARIOUS a catchphrase)

I caught the jist of the argument, and yeah the girls were right, but what drove Mikey to say "fuck off"? I missed it, but caught the Alexandra's "remember my name" signoff.

I dunno, the whole thing were a mess of shouting.

xpost

she (lisa) also looks much much better without all the makeup.

nate & aldo, why is mikey so evil and hated? he's far from my favourite but 'unbearable' and 'utterly vile' seems a bit much?

alexandra is easily my most hated already. she's a stock bb character, young aggressive gobby "i say whats in me head and i dont givva FFFFFFFFUCK innit" woman, and i know im playing right into the producer's hands but still, the way she talks to people is disgusting.

luke is clearly set to be the star of the whole thing. and not because of the oh-so jaded "going on a journey" crap.

hm yeah he didn't apologise for wrecking the pants but understandable when alexandra was spitting venom at him. like he said, he didn't go and deliberately hunt out sylvia's pants to wreck them, it was a stag do where daft things happen - MAJOR overreaction from alexandra and mild overreaction from sylvia.

So? If I were pissed and squeezing on a handy pair of pants (which clearly belong to someone else), the least I would do is apologise.

oh and yes, Alexandra pulled a major overreaction, and she did it because she has to be the centre of attention.

I think the two things that will stick in my mind about ThongGate are:

OHSOBRAVE trying to justify wearing them in the jacuzzi because they "stank of fish" and "smelled like they needed a wash", prompting the classic zing "are you stupid as well as blind?";

WifeBeater claiming we should give OHSOBRAVE a break because "he's blind, so it's not like he could have known he was putting on a thong". I know what he means, I closed my eyes yesterday when I thought I was going to make some toast, and when I opened them I was dressed as a Mexican Wrestler. Shows you how easy these mistakes are to make.

WTF were the pants doing in the hot tub anyway?

Complete overreaction I thought.

xp Yeah, I'm with Mario on that one. I thought I was touch typing before, but all along I was massaging a prostitute. These mistakes can so easily be made.

Didn't the pants-owner think it was funny until she realised they were her pants?

We're watching it again now. She never thought it was funny.

Mario was pretty cringe-worthy with his "HE HAS A DISABILITY" defence in the diary room.

She didn't think it was funny when they came out as Bunny girlblokes.

Not saying it is.

what drove Mikey to say "fuck off"?

At the jacuzzi? They're all yelling so it's hard to pick up, but he definitely said it to Sylvia. I think he said it because he's a cock.

s.rose, my problem with Mikey is that I'm far too familiar with thousands of people from that area of Scotland who say what they like, no matter how insulting it is then when you object act all hurt and defensive and say "it was only a joke, can't you take a joke, I was only trying to have a laugh". Mikey doesn't even bother with the "jokes, bruv" rejoinder, he jumps straight to hurt and defensive because he is OHSOBRAVE.

xpost, alexandra was screaming threats at him and bellowing THIS GUYS GOT NO RESPECT FOR HIMSELF - you really think you'd just nod and go "yes yes you're right, i am sorry" with that barrage of shit being thrown at you? if so, you win at humanity, have a cigar. i see overt aggression as much worse a crime than some dumb prank.

the clip is here btw http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X1peUcTWlqI

ha, one of the linked vids on that clip is 'Love is strange' by Mickey and Sylvia

alexandra was screaming threats at him and bellowing THIS GUYS GOT NO RESPECT FOR HIMSELF - you really think you'd just nod and go "yes yes you're right, i am sorry" with that barrage of shit being thrown at you?

Later, yes. Alexandra had properly calmed down by the end of the daily. If he apologised, we didn't see it.

Facial expression in that clip at 01:05 = so jaded already.

Thai massage therapist Kathreya Kasisopa, 30, is the current favourite to win the competition, according to Ladbrokes.

Kathreya 7/2
Michael 11/2
Rachel 15/2
Luke 8
Any Other 9
Dale 12
Darnell 14
Rex 14
Mohamed 16
Jennifer 25
Mario 25
Dennis 33
Stephanie 33
Lisa 40
Rebecca 40
Sylvia 66
Alexandra 100

Nobody cares about this anymore, do they? On the show I mean.

Fucking hell, without makeup Steph looks like an Ugly Jade. I never thought I wold put those two words together.

Still care but Euro 2008 consuming my telly patience at the moment.

Anyway, Mikey you cunt, you cannot claim your excuse for ruining
pants is "that's what people do", either you know what happens prior to a wedding or you don't, that's why you don't just drag a groom into a room because you fancy a a bit of toast. Also, see my point above and it becoming about him rather than being sad the wedding might not happen.

Way to go BB, 90 minutes is the exact duration to ask questions about something.

Way to go Dale, yes, Steph did indeed "keep it real" and "be true" durinher entore time of lying to you.

Nice to see the woman Mikey fought with last nigt being the only one that asked how he was about the lie put in front of him. Also lol@Lisa struggling not to say "ah, but he's teh blinds".

Conspiracies ahoy. People have beeen threatened with eviction in previous years for less.

Haha all three of us in our house, who haven't been living together that long, ended up watching this and admitted we'd been too embarrassed to watch it before.

Mario seemed well intentioned tonight but the amount of guilt-laden condescension made for incredibly painful telly. His girlfriend seemed to be taking it all in good stride.

Rachel seems lovely, the only one of the other female housemates who isn't terrible on first impression. I like Mohammed as well.

Argh god, I've been sucked in, haven't I?

ONE OF US GABBA GABBA

Conspiracies ahoy. People have beeen threatened with eviction in previous years for less.

what is this about plz

Wifde Beater, OHSOBRAVE and FormerBodybuilder sat in the bedroom discussing the cliques that had built up and who (given one of them isn't up for eviction) other people might vote for.

Ah, but it's one thing to postulate who might go, it's another to 'influence' a housemate who they should nominate, and that's not what happened.

Nah, even talking about it has been verboten in previous years.

When it suits, like. When it suits.

They sometimes wait a couple of days before dropping the bomb on that 'you have been discussing nominations' thing. Gives them time to think up a humiliating punishment.

bbbut there havent been any!

They've got some kind of solitary confinement cell where they're going to stick rule-breakers this year, but like I said it's crazy to think of the rules as being anything but a plot-device for Endemol to use as and when they choose.

So anyway, the "Wedding" task was a big flop for Big Brother. Mario and Lisa's relationship was not tested in any way, yeah Steph could have been more into it, but the housemates aren't going to be as dumb as to not consider that it's not a real wedding.

Kathreya has already created a journey for herself in the whole English language thing. Whether it's authentic or she's putting it on, viewers will latch onto this.

This occured to me too when she was doing the "hirrarious!" thing, mainly because I'm pretty sure Thai differentiates between L and R pretty well.

Ok I've just looked it up to be sure and it seems that some Thai people have some problems with saying R's (it's a softer sound in Thai), but they usually change the Rs to Ls, not Ls to Rs, so perhaps she's playing up to the East Asian stereotype because people think it's cute or the person that taught her the word was making a nasty joke.

And Mikey is pretty horrid, disabled people aren't made of glass and if one's being a twat then we can take being called a twat, Mario was bad enough but Mikey seems perfectly happy to go along with it if it means he doesn't have to take responsibility.

Is this basically Mario v Stephanie then?

Lisa vs Steph, possibly.

I think it's more "the others" but.

The ever popular 'how's the voting going' link...

http://vote.sparklit.com/poll.spark/1077912

Caveat: This, for new readers, is a poll that a fan site (trans: advertising heavy unofficial site) runs for people to vote on various questions, notably "who do you want evicted" which gives some indication as to who may well be going on friday. This shows the current state of play. If you want the 'surprise', do not click. But I don't think there's too much shockage to be found right now.

That's consistent with the betting.

Luke has Mario totally sussed.

Donald seems like a totally nice guy (who, apparently is partially sighted because of his albinism but doesn't want to make anything out of it), but is totally zinging Mikey. "Frankly, I think it's better that people like Sylvia have a go at you if you've done something wrong. I want to be a normal person and if I act like a dick I expect to get told I'm a dick. I don't want anyone making excuses I don't deserve." Mikey went a bit quiet, then.

OK, you've suckered me in, I've just turned over for the first time since opening night.

Mario and Lisa do not appear to have any chemistry at all. Are they really a couple?

donald is a patronising fuck

maybe a bit strong

Imagine being on holiday in the same hotel as them. Jesus.

Normally I'd say lol@bad edit, C4 must have money on Mario going but he is that bad. Plus the preview makes it look like Steph gets a bad edit in the second half.

Darnelle was great earlier, wouldn't say he was zinging so much as quietly trying to show Mikey the error of his ways? Orville way more savvy than I took him for, also true. Predicted on last Thursday that Mario and Lisa wd do the traditional middle-aged "we're mad for it us oh bollocks to this I'm bored of living like a fucking student" sullen apathy thing within a fortnight.

A bad edit for Steph is showing her on TV, right?

Who is Charley Mk2? She MUST GO.

alexsandra is a patronising bully w/quite a nice command of english

UHSACTLY

Never forget: being polite and pleasant is a sign of weakness.

be ready

rememer I told you

Yeah, but her central point is right. If food is rationed it's pointless to give it to people who can't cook and just go LOL I TRIED when there's a professional chef in the house who is happy to do it. (cynical view that being the cook normally means you don't get nommed aside) Plus the only reason it did go on so long is that other people who were trying to make person side points about standing up for WACKYCOV kept on reviving to chuck in their penn'orth.

Think of it as the BB version of Ed's soft drink thread, which appears to be about tipping now.

no

OK don't.

Ak, just come back from some Aussie mates' flat and I fear they may have sucked me in with their BB watching ways.

Who is Charley Mk2? She MUST GO.

Yep.

Anyone who does the whole 'I'm like this and if you don't like it you can eff off' thing needs to leave quickly, never mind her 'not tryin' to be funny' proclamation every 12 seconds.

"people who say they speak as they find, and are somehow proud of it"

Bookies now preidcting Mario to go.

I'm intrigued as to how/why Jennifer is pretending not to be married just to conduct this bizarre fauxmance with Dale.

It will be interesting tonight to see how Alex gets edited since she is the one people turn to over TartGate. Could mark the start of the BB Classic - The Journey.

The poll has steph madly ahead to go, so what are the bookies knowing?

Steph's odds are 2/1 so it could be free money...

I have turned the corner on Alex, she's a total cow. Don't see what Tweedy-lite's problem with Donald is.

lol@amount of effort Steph put into the lightbulb task.

Alexandra is like Charley but without any of the classic soundbites or entertaining bits.

Most of the dudes all appear to be hanging together in a 'wtf is going on in this house?' way, without actually offending anyone. This house is going to be such a massive sausage party by week five.

Rachel is a stayer though. I think I already want to marry her. This could get really embarassing over the next few weeks.

I might tip Darnell as an outside winner, I loved the way he went "I don't know anything about you except you're a mother, and you're a very good looking woman" and she couldn't stop herself from blushing slightly and looking away.

lol@ task paranoia.

"You shut up, haemmoroid."

Mario has taken the pulse of every previous Big Brother, learnt its lessons and is so obviously playing his entire game based on them. Suck up to the sympathy vote housemates, rip into the Nuts magazine girls, free pass at least half way through by virtue of backing the right side. It won't work.

Luke on the other hand is playing the Glyn game and will go miles.

I have to go to bed now, but the sight of Kat in that chair is keeping me awake.

I hade to laugh at Tweedy-lite doing the whole thing about "not being myself" then failing AGAIN to tell Dale about her husband.

Tweedy is a really repugnant character, you can tell. She's clearly repulsed by even being in the same room as Darnell, he made a pretty decent apology and she didn't even look at him.

So, is Mario going on Friday?

I haven't seen much that'd upset the voting public that much...

.. enough to take out the 'first one out = girl' BB rule.

I don't know, the Tweedy breakdown at the end of last night's show which she kind of blamed on Steph might mean something. Also Steph was the aggressive gobby one in the fight with Mario which wasn't even a fight and didn't even concern her.

Steph is a sour-faced mouthy blonde girl who walks around in tiny pants, of course she's going.

Alexandra is like Charley but without any of the classic soundbites or entertaining bits.

Someone wants to grab all those crap chips she cooked and ram them into her face until she stops breathing. Repugnant waste of oxygen.

It was Rebecca that cooked the crap chips.

Oh look, grab anything really, I don't care what, anything, shove it into Alexandra until she loses consciousness and stops talking for 12 weeks.

I was gonna say. In a ricky gervaise voice "err, bit bullying, innit?"

"yknow, smashing chips into peopples mouths, and that.."

I don't mean any harm or discomfort to her, merely to lose consciousness and/or die.

Also

Super Mario: OH NOES HE IS BLIND CAN'T YOU SEE HE IS DISABLED HE IS BLIND
Everyone: ...
Super Mario: LEAVE THE BLIND MAN ALONE! POOR BLIND MAN HE IS BLIND POOR MAN
Mikey: ...
Super Mario: LEAVE HIM ALONE HE BLIND HE BLIND
Everyone: ...
Mikey: ...

etc etc

('die' was a bad joke, obv I don't want her to actually die)

OK, lose consciousness is left.

She doesn't actually show any signs of consciousness but hey...

Did Dennis & Rachel eat their picnic?

No they did not.

Apparently, they thought that if they ate the food, the other housemates would lose their food.

So, they went back inside to general "um, why didn't you eat?" and "No you can't have the food back" from Big Brother.

That conversation between Rachel & Dennis was one of the most ridiculous BB moments ever: Dennis thinks - for no reason whatsoever - that the other housemates will lose their food, says it out loud, and by doing so convinces himself and Rachel that its true. So a whole picnic basket full of food goes in the bin. What a twat.

The "Cookie" thing is really driving me up the wall.

"'Member I told you" is getting seriously old.

This series is really finding a nice balance between "paint drying" and "nails down a blackboard".

vie-o-lay-TED

The sparklit poll has this:

This poll is temporarily closed. Votes are not being accepted for the moment. We are re-jigging things as there's been a huge sway in public opinion over the past 48 hours. Please pop back at around 10.30/11am. Thanks

So, are people coming out *for* steph suddenly? and, as they cannot vote for Alexandra, are they voting for Mario?

Man! Where's David Davies when you want one?

Kathreya has already created a journey for herself in the whole English language thing. Whether it's authentic or she's putting it on, viewers will latch onto this.

-- Autumn Almanac, Monday, 9 June 2008 20:39 (4 days ago) Bookmark Link

putting it on
putting it on
putting it on
putting it on
putting it on
putting it on

Se has entirely designed 'cookie' as a catchphrase. Really starting to dislike her now.

all-in-one shiny suits = win

I think Rachel might be the most attractive housemate there has ever been.

aw

I'm sort of torn between "would smash" and "awww I love you" right now. Surely the frontrunner to get into a torturously long 'will they won't they' type thing with a male housemate of no guile whatsoever. Maybe Mohammed.

She's too lovely and pure etc. Plus chances of catholic splorking muslim probably remote.

Torturously long 'will they won't they' things with a male housemate of no guile whatsoever usually end up 'they won't'.

Definitely, but the 14 year old girl viewers never give up hope.

Dale will be kicked out for physical and/or mental abuse. I'm calling it now.

alexandra seems to be properly breaking down at points, as opposed to charley who was pretty oblivious for many a week iirc.

task made me lol.

I've only seen about half of the shows so far and am not fully familiar with everyone's names yet. Isn't Rachel the Miss Wales contestant who according to (possibly sour grapes) fellow contestants is a real nasty piece of work? She does seem OK so far I guess.

http://vote.sparklit.com/poll.spark/1077912

Now, this I don't think will spoil anything...

The overwhelming initial vote was for Stephanie to get evicted. But suddenly there's been an anti-Mario vote. Why? 1) defending Mikey in a "he is blind" overcompensation 2) saying his g/f's kit made her look like a slag. Is that the lot? Have I missed owt?

Anyroad, after the reset, Mario is ahead, not by loads but enough..

But, unlike this poll, the real phone vote can take more than one vote per person if they ring in. So, resetting the poll just excludes the "anti-Stephanie" days. Since then, she's been more sinned against than sinning, right?

And, I dunno, when she jumped into the pool wearing her wedding dress (which she would not do IRL, right?) I kinda warmed to her.

So, what do I know?

Maybe Alexandra should go instead!

Maybe more people are hearing about the wifebeating thing.

If he goes, will this be the first time a man has been evicted first?

Mario deserves to go for all the "OPEN YOUR EYES, HE'S DISABLED AND MUST BE PATRONISED AT EVERY AVAILABLE OPPORTUNITY" bullshit

Stephanie goes...

I haven't actually heard about the wifebeating thing. I assumed that was some ILX joke or something! Kinda disappointed he didn't go, anyway.

It's a story in The Sun, it seems. June 9th.

sun = must be true

To be fair to the Sun, the BB gossip is normally true. It's the sort of thing they're good at, really, isn't it.

I wouldn't put a Murdoch publication and 'good at' in the same sentence.

Good luck in narrowing down the world's media then.

There's some left.

Yeah the Grauniad is highly thought-of in these parts.

ha

I think that big brother should not have members of of a secret society i.e. freemasons on the show, as this gives them a distinct advantage over nineteen year old girls, It is well known that the freemasons look after their own and each other's interests first. The bookies and the general public wanted Mario out not Stephanie.

I was wondering for the next big brother, maybe the house mates would be full of Britsh army, air force and navy soliders, that way the public would not be dissapointed and there is not a task we would not do and we would challenge big brother to find a task we can not do. Hope you think this is a good idea.

Jimmy Saville will be working on it right now!

So anyroad, Marco was being a total pain during the 'music' 'task'...

Because Darnielle was the task manager, he went round everyone trying to give people intruments they either wanted to play, or physically had the capability to play, helping people get to grips with what they had.. Except Marco wanted to tell Darn that certain people shold be playing not that but *this*, and etc yakyak, to which a visibly irritated Darn tried to keep calm, explain why you don't put the least musical person on drums (because they have to drive the band, and quite right), and seemed to spend most of the hour dragging out the details with Marco.

So they did the version of "When the saints come marching in" and it was bad. Did they pass the task, I dunno.

In other news, the Star has it Marco in the diary room insisting on Alexandra being expelled for anti-disabled-discriminatory bullying. Which is illegal, in Marco's eyes.

Marco's situation is interesting. Unless Channel 4 do everything in their power to prevent Alexandra getting nominated, she will probably be up. Has Marco irritated enough people to get the nomination also?

probably.

He has a fan club, y'know. All his fans love him. He won't be voted out because all his fans love him.

Dale will you please puts away your tits for five minutes.

Yep, all the 14 million people in his fan club will vote for him to stay in. And he's made connections you know, he knows a lot of famous people like the Ant and Dec, and they'll be on his side, they'll vote out all those wannabes in the house who reckon they hang out with famous people, not Mario.

haha that ant & dec thing was hilarious! let me get this straight, he was one of the HUNDREDS of members of the public they have on that show to do some silly task, on one single episode out of dozens and dozens... and he was so shit-hot that from that one show he's built up a huge nationwide fanbase? oh but lets not forget that he travels about a lot and networks. awesome.

also lisa (who isn't that bad, really) was on that john burton-race/angela hartnett show kitchen criminals a few months back.

what's the full story behind mario's wifebeating thing? there have been some claims in the tabloids but was he ever sent down for it? ch4 don't seem to have commented on it, although they have mentioned about the time mohammed was arrested for BITING a policeman. i thought it was a policy not to let people with criminal records in, let alone convictions for violence.

it looks like it'll be a two-horse race between mario and alexandra, thanks to sublime editing suite manipulation i'm now wanting mario to go first as alexandra appears to have relaxed a touch.

rex has a weird shaped head.

So, if the noms go Alexandra and Mario,

Mario will be all "oh they all nominated me to ensure the people vote for Alexandra to go"

There's a Mario in every small-town nightclub in the UK, his schtick at least is entertainingly painful.

You can be arrested for biting a cop (which happens a lot when people who don't want to be arrested get restrained poorly) but if the CPS or even the cops don't decide to take it forward, you are obviously never going to be convicted of it.

The Daily Star has it that Alexandra was having a go at Mohammad in a "you are a muslim so you look down on me innit, not beink funny or nothin"

This because he's not having a go at (insert name) because she doesn't like him and keeps telling M that he's talking down to you innit?

I love interrupting people who aren't being funny or nothin' with 'No, you're completely serious, and that's the joke.'

What a promising young housemate, a massive disappointment that BB chose to use her in such a brief, cynical way%u2026 the producers should be ashamed of themselves. I believe that Stephanie could have been the star of BB9, perhaps not the winner; but a housemate to keep viewers entertained throughout the summer. Her early eviction was the most tragic moment that I have ever witnessed on a reality show. BB9 June 5-13 RIP

Get grace out

Wow, Stephanie got 48% of the eviction vote. That's very, very high for a 4 way, all the big numbers previously have been in 2 and 3 way votes.

http://www.channel4.com/bigbrother/media/images/Channel4/bigbrother9/day13/morning/video/bb9_d13_0038_boob_v182.jpg

Nominations to be announced today.

Stephanie, who was disqualified from Popstars: The Rivals for lying about her age, became the first Big Brother 9 evictee, receiving 48% of the vote on Friday's show.

Oh, so that was her?

She's really doing well with the reality TV shows, ay?

She could still get a job with Siralan.

Endemol have more or less said Alexandra is up for eviction, because they've talked about increased security for Friday to protect her.

Not been watching this at all, but I see they've finally picked up the music task I suggested on ILE approx. 5-6 years ago though clearly the spoilsport producers mucked it up by demanding that they learn a tune instead of a week of IMPROV NIRVANA which would have been the greatest thing on any TV ever.

Oh they're keeping the instruments? That's cool.

Leak sez Alex and Mario.

Stephanie, who was disqualified from Popstars: The Rivals for lying about her age, became the first Big Brother 9 evictee, receiving 48% of the vote on Friday's show.

What Steph sounds like singing:

http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewprofile&friendid=129705036

It's much more pleasant than when she talks.

Please someone explain Alexandra to me. Am watching some ludicrous argument between her and Mohamed where she is arguing that breaking the terms of religious upbringing by swearing and smoking and drinking is OK but dressing up for a party isn't and my mind is boggling.

I missed the start. They are apologising to her for some diary room conversation that was "accidentally" broadcast so she could hear it. Was it an accident?

(disclaimer: I have watched approx 10 minutes of this show since opening night and before tonight. I'm not really paying large amounts of attention right now. Are they setting her up for a ratings-busting controversial eviction, or is she really that annoying and it was genuinely an accident?)

I suspect both. I think they did it deliberately (although lol@Dennis telling everyone "IT'S A TECHNICAL HITCH") and she is that annoying.

http://vote.sparklit.com/poll.spark/1078564

Be amazed!

Oh and that 'crisp sorting' task...

What would have been so unclever about saying "Sod the token, we're all down on food, why don't we just eat the damn crisps?"

Channel 4 have apparently closed the phonelines and cancelled the vote for this week

http://www.channel4.com/bigbrother/news/newsstory.jsp?id=2722&position=23

Alex been removed, according to Digital Spy.

Yeah, seems she went in the diary room 45 minutes ago and hasn't been seen since.

My digibox is messing up on the livefeed channel :(

One of the tabloids that I saw in a shop today was describing her as the most hated contestant in the history of Big Brother. Pre-emptive removal in case tabloid-believing people got whipped up into a violent frenzy at her eviction on Friday?

The housemates appear to be discussing her departure now.

Possibly.

I've got the livefeed channel working again and they're all talking about her and the reaction she'll get from outside. Several of them being all "i never had a problem with her" "lovely girl".

At least this way she goes and Mario doesn't act like a smug twat for a week for winning another phone vote. It's win win.

Apparently, according to the DStar, she was all "I'm gonna get my gangsta friends sorted if I go out! Pop pop pop, yknawa'Imean?"

I can tell yr all rivveted.

I think I watched it last night but I genuinely can't remember. It's not very good this year.

it's been boring in the past and kept people talking though - i get more of a "its time has passed" feeling this time. i've read bits and bobs about this series but really don't care about watching it. i can only remember two of them anyway, the one who's just being chucked out cuz she's too gully, and the thai one who's surely playing up to some weird oriental stereotype

Boris in, Ken out. Cameron 26% ahead in the polls. "Time for a change" etc.

It just feels like there's too many people, so you don't really get to know anyone. It's always better when there's less than 10.

I'm finding Tweedy'lite's attempts to drum up a fauxmance with Dale increasingly hilarious though, especially when she increasingly random words to him so the people two feet away can't hear. Because she's got a kid, she needs to know a relationship is going to work out FOREVER before she enters it. ERM, YER AKSHERLY MARRIED LUV.

She said: "I'm not throwing water at anyone. It's bigger than that... personal offence is never forgotten, do you know what I mean?

"We are just inside the house. I've got a very strong team outside the house".

She added: "I just can't wait to see my mans and them and see what their plans are, who they got...I'm not talking about those mans, I'm talking about my gangster friends. They got some instructions to follow out."

She added later: "I get to go out, see everyone's friends, I get to see their family... Pow, pow, pow."

"I get to go out, see everyone's friends, I get to see their family... Pow, pow, pow."
"I get to go out, see everyone's friends, I get to see their family... Pow, pow, pow."
"I get to go out, see everyone's friends, I get to see their family... Pow, pow, pow."
"I get to go out, see everyone's friends, I get to see their family... Pow, pow, pow."
"I get to go out, see everyone's friends, I get to see their family... Pow, pow, pow."
"I get to go out, see everyone's friends, I get to see their family... Pow, pow, pow."
"I get to go out, see everyone's friends, I get to see their family... Pow, pow, pow."
"I get to go out, see everyone's friends, I get to see their family... Pow, pow, pow."
"I get to go out, see everyone's friends, I get to see their family... Pow, pow, pow."
"I get to go out, see everyone's friends, I get to see their family... Pow, pow, pow."
"I get to go out, see everyone's friends, I get to see their family... Pow, pow, pow."
"I get to go out, see everyone's friends, I get to see their family... Pow, pow, pow."
"I get to go out, see everyone's friends, I get to see their family... Pow, pow, pow."
"I get to go out, see everyone's friends, I get to see their family... Pow, pow, pow."
"I get to go out, see everyone's friends, I get to see their family... Pow, pow, pow."
"I get to go out, see everyone's friends, I get to see their family... Pow, pow, pow."
"I get to go out, see everyone's friends, I get to see their family... Pow, pow, pow."
"I get to go out, see everyone's friends, I get to see their family... Pow, pow, pow."
"I get to go out, see everyone's friends, I get to see their family... Pow, pow, pow."
"I get to go out, see everyone's friends, I get to see their family... Pow, pow, pow."
"I get to go out, see everyone's friends, I get to see their family... Pow, pow, pow."
"I get to go out, see everyone's friends, I get to see their family... Pow, pow, pow."
"I get to go out, see everyone's friends, I get to see their family... Pow, pow, pow."

Great publicity for C4's upcoming Disarming Britain season then.

xp
Steve Reich could make a tape loop out of that.

dis·arm·ing (ds-ärmng)
adj.
Tending to allay suspicion or hostility; winning favor or confidence

Though in the C4 dictionary it says: THROW THOSE GUNS AWAY (and get fined by the council for littering).

God that Disarming Britain series looks grim. An "unflinching look". That'll make a nice change.

The others will get a chance to fucking speak now that Charley mk II has gone.

good gravy this woman is pathetic

Right, so one of the people who was up for eviction gets kicked out, leaving you on Thursday where you would have been on Friday. IN WHAT WORLD DOES THAT SAY NEW HOUSEMATE TO YOU? Because it does to Endemol.

o really?

Yes. No details yet.

it's been boring in the past and kept people talking though - i get more of a "its time has passed" feeling this time.

i have to agree with this. i watched it for the first time since the eviction show last night and it was just seemed far too formulaic, the controversies so manufactured. i think bringing a new person in at this early stage is just a sign that this thing has run its course. calling alex "charley mk II" is a bit rub, charley was, at least, amusing and some of her rants genuinely defied belief.

Caught a bit of the 'It's fine for Muslims to get pissed up, but Allah hates men in bras' row, and that was pure agro for agro's sake. That Mohammed guy handled it pretty well I thought, particularly as he didn't try and bullshit his way out of what he'd said to BB.

Rumour mill suggests it is Shelley, the cousin of Grace Adams-Short who is going in, escorted by Grace who will be in the house for a short time.

That's a good plan, get rid of one argumentative, violent bitch and... oh.

as in Grace from previous BB ?

The very same.

I know, let's lock a bunch of people in a house with nothing to do but bitch about each other, some of whom are SPECIFICALLY CHOSEN FOR THEIR VOLATILITY, then act all surprised when it kicks off! Jesus christ Endomol.

(xpost) the sound you are now hearing is the bottom of a barrel being scraped.

Who will be the mystery NEW HOUSEMATE? Will Endemol pick the following:

Jade Goody
Jennifer Celeria
Philip Hensher
William Gallas
Ed Vaizey
Rev Ian Paisley
Woman With Dog Out Of Britain's Got Talent
Lembet Opik
Confused.Com Bloke
Abi Out Of The Zutons

Mark E Smith

I'm trying to imagine what an argument between Alex and MES would be like - apart from short, I mean:

Alex: paranoid stuff and nonsense, laughable tough talk, random threats, etc.
MES: "Shut up-ah!!!"

where is paul dannanband?

wow psychic

Get grace out

-- onimo, Tuesday, June 17, 2008 1:34 PM (Tuesday, June 17, 2008 1:34 PM) Bookmark Link

Alex: paranoid stuff and nonsense, laughable tough talk, random threats, etc.
MES: paranoid stuff and nonsense, laughable tough talk, random threats, etc.

Paul Anka I'm the only important one in this house &c.

Did Grace and Mikey ever get married or was that just one long drawn out engagement to get more tv time?

They're supposed to be getting married this year, I think.

I was wrong, they got married last October.

I never got an invite...sadface.

OK, watching that in real time was much, much worse than the transcript made it sound.

Oh my god, what a hateful bitch. They got her out for her own safety, never mind anyone else's.

Yeah, that was bad.

She'll be interviewed by Davina though, and they're going to introduce a new housemate.

god please no.

I'm sorry I have socks hand
I'm sorry I have socks hand
I'm sorry I have socks hand
I'm sorry I have socks hand
I'm sorry I have socks hand
I'm sorry I have socks hand
I'm sorry I have socks hand
I'm sorry I have socks hand
I'm sorry I have socks hand
I'm sorry I have socks hand
I'm sorry I have socks hand
I'm sorry I have socks hand

i hate da cow, tank god she's gone also GET STEPH BAK IN!!!!! dat wil rely hot tings up btwen her n Rex plux poor Rex misses her ALOT!
Posted by Zax on 20/06/2008 12:26:50
Offensive? Unsuitable? Report this comment

Who is this tank god?

glad to see attempts by Autumn Almanac and aldo to characterise housemates w/ catchy and funny nicknames (alexandra is "Charley mk II", mikey is "OHSOBRAVE" and jennifer is "Tweedy'lite") were so uncatchy and unfunny

That new feller is one of the hottest guys I have ever seen.

Yeah I think he already knows that...

Shame. I just know that by Wednesday I'm going to hate him.

so funny about dale crying to jennifer and sylvie because people at school and college hated him because of the way he looks

The more I see this, the more I feel like Darnell is ftw!

Johann Hari wrote about Big Brother in today's Indie.

It wasn't very interesting.

Darnell and Luke this year's Pete/Glynn?

haha classic moment just then, mikey doing the roughest and shittest stand-up routine ever, people not even bothering to fake laugh after the first quip, girls gasping in horror, then he stops, silence for ages, views of the garden, camera then flicks to mikey sat up in bed in the dark, mouth open as if to say "... shit"

even beats rebecca bouncing on luke's bed in a short skirt then lying flat out in front of him legs akimbo with him falling back hand on his face "oh i just had the most horrible view"

could tell the mikey thing was going to go wrong from the start when everyone was chanting MI-KEE! MI-KEE! and it zoomed in on rachel smiling all nice like he was a small child about to sing a song for them all. "i think that's it guys..." haha

darnell looks like he's freezing to death sat in the bath

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/entertainment/7470676.stm

Darnell's now called Dennis, apparently.

(ok, they just changed the picture now)

"It's not hard to adhere to, is it? It's not like you're declaring yourself under the Official Secrets Act. They're just saying 'keep your gob shut and use your common sense'," said Mario.

It's funny to think of a) Mario keeping his mouth shut about anything, and b) being some kind of repository of common sense. Or c) working for MI5... "Hi, I'm Mario, and I'm a secret agent... oh shit I'm not supposed to tell anyone...". Plus the image of Mario in a tuxedo can only bring to mind either a waiter at a steak restaurant or a bouncer.

Mohammed and Sylvia, then.

Also, it's taken three weeks but my predictions about Mikey have come true. Jen has formally complained about the way he was talking about her and Sylvia when they were doing leg stretches in the bedroom. When Mario told him she was really offended, he excused himself by saying "it's not like she's 15 years old, she's 21."

yah Mario and Lisa are from my village, i only found this out recently after reading the local gazette in the chinese takeaway.

The Daily Star, this morning was all "CAN MIKEY ACTUALLY SEE????"

.. because in the diary, he said he 'noticed' two housemates getting 'close'

He's completely blind:
http://www.rnib.org.uk/xpedio/groups/public/documents/publicwebsite/public_insightmichael.hcsp

^^^ which suggests that Daily Star journalists must be fucking blind, because I turned that link up after about five seconds on Google...

It's almost as if the Daily Star journalists are too lazy to check their facts!

lol

"They just want pretty chick, I look like A POTATOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"

Kitson out!

"Hey, wanna see a potato I found that looks just like Richard Nixon?"
"Big deal, show me one that doesn't then get back to me"

http://vote.sparklit.com/poll.spark/1078925

Moham vs Sylvia.

OK Go!

Hey, I can't see that RNIB page about Mikey. Maybe they've found out something...?

^^^ the whole RNIB website seems to be down for some (probably technical) reason.

If nobody's going to have sex with Stuart I'll bloody do it myself.

DAily Star's exclusive (for once, copper bottomed it seems...)

Sylvia and Stuart were both on a 'test' runthrough of Big Brother together, about 6 months ago. It seems that they 'got on' particularly well, so Endemol put them both on this years Big Brother for more of the same and told them not to mention anything about it.

Dennis to be thrown out for spitting on Mo last night, during a fight where Rex rubbed pizza in Jen's picture of Stuart APPARENTLY.

So it seems!

The slight caused Jen to burst into tears and seek solace from Dennis in the luxury bedroom.

When Rex came in to apologise, Jen said he had touched something which wasn't his to touch and had completely ruined it. Rebecca then went into the basic bedroom and told Rex: "She is crying her fucking eyes out, fucking asshole."

Dale was visibly agitated, prompting Rachel to plead with him not to "go kicking off now". Kathreya then began to cry due to the growing tension.

Coverage was cut from the house for about an hour as the situation escalated and then was calmed.

Housemates had been divided into the two bedrooms as the footage returned, and were asked to stay there for the rest of the night. Darnell, Rex, Mohamed and Mario were in the basic room, while the rest were proclaiming their shock in the luxury pad.

Dennis had been in the garden with Lisa and entered the luxury bedroom to be hugged by the group. "Do we know what is happening?" they asked.

Dennis said: "I could get removed tomorrow. I told Big Brother 'Take me out right now, but no woman should be made to feel like that from two males'."

In the basic room, Mohamed told Rex: "The more you said sorry, the more Dale felt stronger."

More:

As dust settles on last night’s spat, Big Brother has warned that the housemates might still face disciplinary action.

Dennis reportedly spat at Mohamed during a tense hour where coverage from the house was lost. As a result, the group was divided into the bedrooms while Big Brother called each housemate to the Diary Room to give a personal account of the evening’s events.

From these accounts, producers have said they will decide if further action is necessary, with an update to follow this morning.

A spokeswoman for the show said: "Around 12.45am a verbal argument took place between a number of housemates. During that argument Dennis allegedly spat at Mohamed.

"Big Brother immediately intervened and separated the housemates into their bedrooms, where they will remain until the morning," she told The Sun. "Big Brother is currently talking to each of the housemates individually and reviewing the situation before deciding if any appropriate action is required."

Right, so Emma Greenwood was thrown out the same night for spitting on Victor, but Dennis (who has been boasting about his "producer friend Sharon" who is presumably Exec Prod/Creative Director Sharon Powers) gets to stay where he is till they decide what they're going to do?

Emma Greenwood was 'thrown out' into the bedsit room until they decided what to do.

She was last seen on the show calmly playing with stuff in the room, and was never shown leaving. So, presumably,she's still there!

But, srsly, no.

If I was to guess, I'd say Dennis is going.

Spitting is akin to punching as far as 'assault' is deemed, thesedays in the UK.

Unless it was 'accidental' or some such.

My emphasis:

Profile: Jennifer
Current Status: In house

House History
Day 1: Entered house.

Age: 22

From: Durham

Occupation: Part-time model, full-time mum

Status: Separated

Details: Jennifer describes herself as ambitious, ruthless and opinionated - and insists that she wouldn’t enter Big Brother if she didn’t think she could win. She says being a mother to her 22-month-old daughter has made her the proudest person in the world.

She’s a vegetarian and passionate about animal welfare, saying she’d like to free all animals so that no cows, pigs or chickens can be killed inhumanely. She is also anti-fox hunting, anti-abortion, anti-smoking, anti-fur, and dislikes ladettes and "people who spit".

Raised Catholic, Jennifer goes to church about once a month, and says her life philosophy is "buy cheap, buy twice". She’s a part-time model but wouldn’t do glamour shots with her breasts exposed. Jennifer admits that she uses her beauty and brains to get what she wants, and if she could have sex with a celebrity it would be Simon Cowell. The most expensive thing she has ever bought is a £400 Vivienne Westwood handbag.

Jennifer's motivation for being on Big Brother is to make her daughter and loved ones proud.

Hahahaha

Dennis called to the Diary Room, very good DS source says to be removed.

So after reading the description of the incident that started this fight, something more must have happened for Dennis to spit on Mo than Mo's "It's only a picture!" comment, right? Because if not, WOW WHAT AN ASSHOLE.

You really haven't been watching this, have you Dan.

Of course I haven't! I never watch, I just form opinions based on this thread and dipping in on the website.

The whole fight was really about something beyond the picture incident, right? Other tensions fueled this one? Because I can't see this as an incident that causes tears and spitting in and of itself.

No, it was just based on this.

Reading into it a bit further, Jen had a bigger plan that tried to get Rex thrown out for hitting Bex by trying to get a very drunk Bex to smear food over him (this may be the source of the whole "Rex smeared pizza" story, which now appears to be totally erroneous) and when this failed she made a drama out of Rex "lengthening the hair" on the picture she had drawn of Stu by wetting his finger and smearing the paint slightly.

Dennis got involved because it was "disgusting to see grown men round ing on a broken woman".

HMs just been told he's gone. It's like someone has just shot Jen and Sylvia's puppies in front of them, the level of waterworks.

Dale is now trying to start a fight with Mo about it.

Dale in the Diary Room after directly threatening Mo.

hahaha what the hell

"She is crying her fucking eyes out, fucking asshole."

I bet she actually said 'arsehole'. Fucking idiot press.

Jen and Sylvia now in the luxury bedroom hugging each other, crying and rocking back and forth like they're the last two survivors in Friday 13th XXVII.

Wait, isn't Sylvia odds-favorite for eviction, too?

lolololol @ Jen

Of course I haven't! I never watch, I just form opinions based on this thread and dipping in on the website.

Don't go near the website. This thread is all I need! It's obviously not been a good year because this thread has been seriously quiet.

Dale will not be allowed back in the house until they are sure he won't kick it off again. Shades of Emma, there.

lolololol

Remove Dale now! LOL haven't watched any of this series so far, but this is great.

Eviction still going ahead tho?

Haha, Jen has just said "justice will be served" when Mo gets evicted tonight. Longest odds you can get on Sylvia are about 1/33.

Eviction planned to go ahead after the Dennis thing, but if Dale goes...

Wait, so Dale's being kicked out now? Huh??

lololol the look on Rachel's face at the moment

Mohammed - will be utterly nondescript. Convinced he is funny, will realise he isn't and be told to button it by Dale in week2 , leading to a bust up that involves a formal warning.

-- aldo, Friday, 6 June 2008 09:02 (3 weeks ago)

okay that is frightening

Aldo outed as BB insider SHOCKAH!

Now this is what I want from my manipulative and freakshow-esque reality TV!

I like Mohammed so am lolling at this turn of events

Dale back in the house but has been formally warned.

Jen had a bigger plan that tried to get Rex thrown out for hitting Bex

It got reported by people watching the live feed, yes.

Jol out

Jen now trying to start a fight with Darnell.

"He didn't really spit at him, he just pretended to to defuse the situation."

was about to post that

Haha, Rebecca (who was so drunk last night she made herself sick to try and sober up) is pretending she has total recall about the events to try and start a fight with Rex, who is mopping the floor with her.

Jen sulking after Darnell totally owned her.

This could be one of the most spectacular collapses of a BB faction ever.

Actually looking forward to watching it tonight

Yeah, it'll be very interesting to see how much of today they show because if it all kicks off again when Sylvia goes it could be useful for context. Normally they would only have gone as far as them going to bed Thursday night.

Jen and Stuart now starting again on Mo.

D'you know why they're all rounding on Mo now if this was aimed at Rex to begin with, just cos he stuck up for him or something?

As far as I can work out:

It started with Rex, Jen got upset (although it transpires the picture was probably only an excuse as she was crying beforehand anyway. Rex apologised, Dale and Stuart though the apology "wasn't good enough" and went spoiling for a fight, met Mo and cornered him, Rebecca got involved, Dennis perceived (egged on by Jen) that Mo was attacking Rebecca, couldn't get close enough because Rebecca was in the way so spat on him, over her.

They are all picking on Mo today because it's all his fault, apparently. According to Jen, "he's a Muslim therefore he hates women. He's done all this because he's a bigot."

Muslims not doing well on Big Brother this year... or any year

Jen now in the diary room, having been called in with a very stern voice. She could talk her way out of the door, here.

http://www.channel4.com/bigbrother/media/images/Channel4/bigbrother9/Day23/morning/gallery/reaction/bb9_d23_1350_pair_a.jpghttp://www.channel4.com/bigbrother/media/images/Channel4/bigbrother9/Day23/morning/gallery/reaction/bb9_d23_1350_pair_a.jpg

My heart bleeds

That was meant to be a picture, but it didn't work. Here: http://www.channel4.com/bigbrother/media/images/Channel4/bigbrother9/Day23/morning/gallery/reaction/bb9_d23_1350_pair_a.jpg

This is resembling the bit in "Naked Gun" where Drebin is the baseball umpire and is sending everybody off the field

"All right, you're out of here!"

"What? You can't throw an umpire out!"

"All right, YOU'RE out!"

http://www.channel4.com/bigbrother/media/images/Channel4/bigbrother9/Day23/morning/gallery/reaction/bb9_d23_1350_pair_a.jpgI think you put the url in twice

Jen has now emerged from the diary room, where she has obviously been coached, and is now making a totally insincere apology to Mo that still manages to blame him for everything.

Also says that she has been spat at before - wonder why

Thanks Colonel!

But does she still maintain that all Muslims hate women?

Maybe she was confused because all Muslims hate her?

the live feed doesn't seem to be available on E4 at the moment. Something else happening?

blimey! I go out into the field for work reasons....

He (luke) went on to say that Dennis's spitting in Mohamed's face "defused" the situation, as otherwise there would have been physical violence. "In real life, if it had happened on the street, there would have been a punch-up," Jennifer agreed.

I know I've only seen chunks of this but have I missed something or is Mo the most inoffensive guy in the world? This year's Team Scumbag obviously extra vile.

Not much on the live feed, Darnell's in the bath, Mikey's sitting alone and grinning, Jen or Rachel putting on fake tan,

Okay, I've seen the last 2 nights but missed out on the previous week or so. Why is Mo hated so much? Did Mario's strategy of going to bed early and not getting involved in anything help him out? And why all the Sylvia hate from the public?

Sylvia's been really annoying the last week or so, maybe because of Stuart coming in? Also the whole "if I want to steal things I will" thing.

Luke's been fucking annoying this week as well.

I seriously think the Mo hate is because he complained, kind of, very politely, that they fucked up the food ordering at the weekend and left him with no Halal meat and next time would they mind thinking about this, please? Which lead Team Fuck You to get all "OH NOES OPPRESSED BY THE MUSLIN RADICAL" or something

Yeah I thought he dealt with that really well, kept calm when they were being dicks etc

There was that argument a few days ago aswell where Dennis though Mohammed was being homophic.

Didn't see that

Me neither, but I do feel like certain housemates are kind of looking for him to behave in stereotypically "muslim" ways.

Yeah they didn't show much of it (probably because he wasn't actually homophobic and they didn't want to give the impresion he was). I'm looking through some DS threads and it seems that Dennis went into the diary room, threatened to leave, and was told by BB that he'd misinterpreted what Mohammed said. And they were already annoyed at Mohammed before that anyway.

I can't find what he actually said, he's just been talking about it on the live feed though.

Aah hah, Mohammed was telling Dennis about a funny DVD he saw that made fun of homophobes, Dennis got upset and thought this meant Mohammed was homophobic. Dennis is thick.

Nowt so thick as idiots looking to be offended.

Why is Mo hated so much?

He's a Muslim, duh

Mohammed was telling Dennis about a funny DVD he saw that made fun of homophobes, Dennis got upset and thought this meant Mohammed was homophobic

omg lolololololololol

There was also a bit where Dennis got all "I can't believe you said that, I'm not talking to you again until you clear it all up in the diary room." So Mo went in and BB was all WTF YOU NEVER SAID ANYTHING DENNIS IS A KNOB.

This is fucking mental.

What a bunch of cunts

Utter chaos. What a way to engineer all of you going out of the door one week after another.

hahahahaha

Nothing more irritating than a bunch of self righteous cunts who can't even begin to realise that they might be in the wrong (team Dale)

darnell was awesome there

"THIS IS SOME BULLSHIT"

The highlight for me was maybe Dennis at the very beginning of the episode in jail saying "I'm never going to break the rules ever again."

Dale & Stuart probably th eworst offenders though, seemed determined to escalate it to fisticuffs.

Go and apologise!

then as soon as Rex does

Get out of here!

Both competing to rescue Jen I guess. xpost re tv hardmen

Mo backing away from Bex = squaring up to a girl... poor bloke at least when Sylvia gets evicted he'll know the public aren't against him I guess

"At least I've got my dignity."

incredible

all jen's fault

totally reveals the character of stu and dale and their like--uninterested in details or the possibility of fairness and only concerned w/ aggressive displays and self-righteousness

also, dale accusing him of squaring up to bex, when she was all up in HIS grill and mohammad was v calm and quiet and only told her to shut up!

dennis obviously revolting. how low--telling people mohammad was homophobic and then spitting in his face

darnell was right to ask if anyone thought that was reasonable. shouted down, of course. dale: "you don't know everything that's happened" !!

imagine if something HAD happened

mario, as much of a fud as he is, is a voice of reason, too

so glad to hear crowds outside, w/ davina, shouting "get jen out"

get her right out but stu and dale and bex too

dennis recounting the events is utterly mental

jen and stu and dale and bex out, after dennis being removed and sylvia going tonite, of course

^^OTM xpost

So basically the best strategy for the sane/non-assholish ones is to lay low and let the knobs get weeded out one by one?

Dennis almost looks contrite (although it would have been easy to have said to apologise to Mo). It'll be fun when we compare his response to everybody else's tomorrow.

Hahahaha all their faces just now.

Spitting is legally assault, right? I wonder if they'll get the cops involved, or ask Mo if he wants to press charges?

By what margin did Sylvia get voted out?

Dunno yet.

Yes, all the speculation today is that if somebody wants to press charges it's definitely assault.

Law was brought in to protect public servants like bus drivers and dole office staff, might even be more than assault. Battery?

conrad otm

the situation seemed to be coming under control a little when rachel and kat were calming jen down

stu's mirroring dale storming off to speak to rex was funny but pathetic

dennis continually saying "creep, creep" just low enough for only the mic to pick it up also despicable

still, best show yet this series

mario lisa rachel and kat are complete floaters and luke was but says nasty stuff in certain companies and let's not forget that he's a big tory (I keep repeating this is there any truth in it?) so funny that luke and bex have totally chosen the wrong side seduced by the good-lookers

let's have rex-mohammad-darnell solidarity. even though rex and darnell are both prone to fuddishness and occasional real badness

yeah jen was way calmed down and nodding now and then when kat and rachel were talking to her and then lisa asked what had happened and sylvia arrived and it all came back. had anyone except rex looked at the painting?

I also liked Jen going from "it looks exactly the same" to "IT'S RUINED" in 30 seconds.

Haha Sylvia takes the female HM record with 90.2% of the vote.

conrad OTM!

Daily Mail reporting the incident as a "gay-Muslim" clash. Helpful. http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/bigbrother/article-1029947/Shocking-scenes-BB-house-Dennis-kicked-spitting-gay-Muslim-clash-Mohamed.html

Tried to post a non-rabid comment on that article several hours ago but perhaps unsurprisingly the moderators have rejected it.

darnell looked most like he was actually ready to fight there : /

it was kind of courageous but he should have tried harder not to pound his fist into his palm during

okay that is maybe one of the funniest things I've ever read since I have no visual to go along with it and the whole situation seems grossly manufactured to me anyway

Mo has been through enough already to make him this year's Shilpa Shetty -- accused of being a bad Muslim by Alex, accused of homophobia by Dennis, accused of being a coward by Dale, accused of hating/disrespecting women by Team Jen -- all either totally false or outrageously hypocritical.

Hope that one of Team Jen is up next week along with Rex and Mo so that they get evicted and knock some of the self-righteousness out of them all.

GET JEN OUT lolz

sylvia body poppin to chants of GET JEN OUT lolololz

DS report Luke telling Jen: "The way (Dennis) left was an atrocity. It took him four years to get in. Maybe it is dangerous to get close to people, Jen."

What a weasly little shit

"Being from Wigan, you would expect me to be a Labour supporter," he told Mario, who had raised the subject of politics. "But most of my views tend to swing towards Conservative ideologies."

He added: "My dad will kill me for saying that."

"My Dad said I'm not allowed to mention anyone in the Conservative party, especially not Margaret Thatcher. He said she ruined this country. But some would say she made this country," he said.

this country is a shithole, so both sides perhaps have a point; luke stands convicted either way

BB viewers tend to fall to the left, so yeah, foregone conclusion.

^ prepared to eat these words

1. This is like a weirdly inverted version of that Danish cartoons thing, except with the childish painting of Stu as a cartoon of Muhammad and the actual muslim guy Mohamed as, well, The West. "It's only a painting."
2. Alcohol flashpoint! Binge!

I love Jen's final words last night. "I can't believe the public would vote out a body like that. She had a great body on her." Shallow, much?

Amazing how much gobgate has changed everything. Three days ago I thought Dennis and Jen were super.

based on what?

I really don't know.

Defective judgement?

Jen was super cos of her comedy "I hate immigrants and my Catholicism has taught me not one ounce of humility but it does let me get snidey at people who have abortions" schtick. Delightful woman.

this country is a shithole, so both sides perhaps have a point

Britain is not a shithole. It has plenty of problems with too much urban sprawl and litter, and currently a pretty aggressive, negative attitude, but there's still plenty of kindness and decency, a wealth of beautiful old buildings and miles of glorious green countryside.

Definitely effective judgement. Mightily embarrassed, me.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v165/noodle_vague/1143209855718764.jpg

Blast first from politeness blessed
Climate for it's joule digest
Infections dismal symbol date
Our disown anticipate
Effeminate lout chagrin
The london cloud truck buckskin
Town's heart' a 1000 mile long 2 spoor
Body of chalet contour
Is pushe3d against us from ten
To make us megadeath pen
Keep back drastic winds' so flare
Machinery to tanned clear
Of "eltham" britannic peafowl
bacteriologist yowl
unsophisticatedly
situate advisedly

"and is there honey still for tea?
I hope you saved some turkey for me"

I'm with Wyndham Lewis on this one.

hahahaha the videos on the Channel 4 site really don't paint Jen and crew in a very good light, do they?

Indeed not. It would be hard to do so, though.

I want to follow this now just so I can watch Jen, Dale, Rebecca and Luke all get paraded out one after the other.

Amazing how much gobgate has changed everything. Three days ago I thought Dennis and Jen were super.

And 3 days ago Mario was the most hated person, now he seems like one of the mose decent people in there.

Also makes some of his "they're playing games with each other but I can see through them" comments ring true!

Mario's a bit of a nob in his own way but he's at least a grown-up.

a grown-up that dresses like a rubbish teenager

It probably says more about how awful the rest of the house is than how great Mario is.

Like I said way upthread, dude is ridiculous but has at least grasped the basic idea that living in the house is a lot nicer if you have a modicum of consideration for your fellows.

One would hope that someone in his mid-40s would have worked that out!

I would hope you'd have worked it out by the age of 20 but year after year Big Broth shows us that the world don't work like that.

20 is somewhat understandable if you've primarily lived with siblings or only one other person up to that point; in many ways it's a lot easier to get away with being horrible to family because there's an automatic forgiveness lurking behind both the offense and the massive retaliation (ie, "we drive each other crazy but WE'RE KIN"), plus it's much easier to be considerate towards a smaller group of people.

I thought about that after I'd posted, yes. Still I was never brought up to have the kind of vicious entitlement that some housemates take a pride in displaying. Maybe it's cos there's so many lol showbiz kids each year, but then again the students who live next door to us come across as selfish anti-social idiots and they're not on TV, as far as I know,

conversely, mario's grown-upness is one of the main sources of his nobbishness

Also I suppose a lot of the contestants go at the show in a gladiatorial way rather than "here's a group of people I'm going to share a house with, I'd better do my best to rub along with them". But I can't imagine them being radically different outside the context of BB. The main reason I still enjoy it is because I think people are often unwittingly forced to "be themselves" even when they think/claim they're putting up a front.

can only really keep posting "jen, dale, stu, bex and luke must go"

stu slightly less than previously but he is enough of a total cunt to keep company w/ those

20 is somewhat understandable if you've primarily lived with siblings or only one other person up to that point

Worryingly, quite a few of the 20-somethings this year are parents, including Jen and Alex.

Yeah, I think there's some regessing-to-childhood going on there (plus some genuine jaw-dropping idiocy).

dale you're a nob don't worry

unfortunate to see mohamed and darnell being forced (by jen's incessant recounting-rewriting as well as big brother's too-subtle guiding of their reflections) to learn the wrong lesson: don't get involved at all

Definitely effective DEFECTIVE judgement. Mightily embarrassed, me.

-- Autumn Almanac, Saturday, 28 June 2008 21:48 (Yesterday) Bookmark Link

predictive text + shit phone = facking hell

So, is the house in meltdown?

Will the show be taken off mid-run?

Is it all over bar the shouting? (admittedly, there's lots of shouting to come)

why what's happened now?

I don't know.

typical

beyond the headache of having to come up with 200+ hours of prime time programming at the last minute the show, even in a poor state like this, makes a shitload of money for ch4. the only thing that would end it would be some kind of attempted stabbing with a kitchen knife (can actually imagine something like this happening).

http://www.rte.ie/arts/2008/0630/bigbrother.html

Admittedly this is via the Daily Star.
Not going to happen though is it. Things have got worse than this in previous series surely.

Of course, could they pull it because no-one's watching? What are the figures like for this year?

Figures are worst ever. Averaging about 3M a night, but with no noticeable increase for evictions.

This might be my favourite BB story this year (my emphasis for lulz):

Some of the housemates were worried that they are running out of food this morning.

The concern was caused when the store room was opened for the group to collect food for the day and there was no bread provided.

Jennifer went to the luxury bedroom to tell Lisa, who replied: "I'd like to know where this £525 budget goes because we didn't order that much. It's impossible because it's a massive budget."

She then tried to remember what the group had bought and estimate a cost. "Where's the £525 going?" she asked.

The housemates agreed that spending £64 on chocolate was too much, and said that each housemate should have three bars each next week, instead of one a day.

Later, Dale pointed out that they still had two more days before the next shopping list, while Rebecca complained that the group had ten jars of peanut butter and four jars of jam, but no bread to have with it.

"I refuse to believe there's no bread left," Dale complained.

I think Dale might be the biggest twat in Big Brother history, and he's up against some serious competition.

Also, although they had £525 they overspent by £80-odd.

Dale then dared Bex to let him squirt a bottle of aftersun all over her.

"I'll let you squirt it on me. I'll take my bra off and everything," she said, before stripping down to the waist.

"Rebecca, no!" Luke shouted from the Big Brother jail.

"This is a shambles. This is getting out of control," he added, as Dale, Darnell and Mohamed began to chase her around the garden, squirting her with the cream.

Bex had shocked housemates the previous evening by emerging from the Diary Room wearing nothing but a thong, joking that Big Brother had asked her to remove her T-shirt.

Hmm, Rebecca's subtle plan seems to be to run around nude.

she is a boor

mario on the impact losing his sight must have had on mikey:

"[after 23 years] he'd seen a lot of things: he'd seen a lot of films, he'd seen a lot of cartoons, he'd seen a lot of sport then overnight he just lost it"

cartoons!

birth-telly-telly-telly-telly-telly-telly-telly-telly-telly-NOTHING

you know what he means though

always thought darnell looked a bit like ray charles and now he's blind and singing hit the road jack!

are dale and stu trying to out-moron each other?

http://media.monstersandcritics.com/articles2/1409587/article_images/dale.jpghttp://pwbeat.publishersweekly.com/blog/wp-content/2008/04/zoolander_blog240x303.jpg

everything stu says is so posed and styled and acted and proper proper proper rubbish

got to say that dale has one of the best bodies i've ever seen.

stu > dale

(mind, I'd do either of them)

Brooker:

housemates consist of 56 simpering brown-haired girls, a shrieking Thai version of Bingo from the Banana Splits, Alan Bennett, Albino Bennett, a tedious hunk, a tedious hunk in eyeliner, him with the Afro, Naomi Campbell Jr, a posh chef, a "bubbly" one, and Perez Hilton.

http://www.guardian.co.uk/theguide/columnists/story/0,,2287924,00.html

stu is just older than dale

nothing else, just older than dale

stu has a good body too

yes Mark G stu is only older than dale

stu's a bit too built for my taste.

i can't believe i got sucked in to this.

I will taste him for you

OK, so it's noms announcements today

GET JEN OUT

I'm liking this more than any other big brother yet it's probably only because i've been far more drunk while watching it. The jen crew is pretty vile.

Darnell is like Nabisco-level OTM every time I watch lately. KIU.

Darnell is now streets-ahead favourite.

(told yer)

It's Jen and Rex nominated apparently. Fantastic.

was having trouble deciding whether I'd prefer jen to go ASAP or have dale, stu, bex and luke go one by one leaving jen. had decided jen ASAP and was hoping for her to be up against rex as it will be good for housemates to have see sylvia go over mohamed and now jen go over rex

noms: lisa right, mario way wrong and a dick again

rebecca just one of the worst ever. boredom driving her to horrible unjustifiable and unentertaining meanness that none of her group will criticise. cannot occupy herself for one second as her mind is far too small

Just watched this for the first time since opening night. Has Rebecca the first fucking clue what she looks like to anyone else?

Most of them didn't seem as bad as I thought they'd be but then I only caught 15 minutes and it was all Rebecca strop.

Mohammed was remarkably restrained. He took a ciggie (without asking) then offered one back and she cuts his fucking belt up and he says "is that us quits then?" wtf

mingers, like vampires, cannot see their own reflection

Thank goodness I don't have to deal with people like Bex IRL

my god, that was incredibly depressing.

http://vote.sparklit.com/poll.spark/1079365

It's not 'who is going', it's "how huge the majority" thesedays...

Wow, I didn't think it would be possible for anyone to eclipse Alexandra in the history of the universe ever.

Rex is a bit of a dick as well (lol bex is a fattie) so for jen to be so far ahead is something special.

Spending your last days in the house on a task that involves you having water that smells of fish thrown at you may or may Jen's just desserts.

Jen is having a total breakdown at the moment. "Llamas are sly, you can't turn your back on them."

I think we might get a whole night of crying from her.

You know Rachael?

I'd completely forgotten she even existed!

http://www.channel4.com/bigbrother/media/images/Channel4/bigbrother9/Day23/morning/gallery/reaction/bb9_d23_1350_pair_a.jpg
This picture needs to be posted more I think.

Rachel seems alright really. Trying to distance herself from Team of Twats. Jen obviously knows this and has been badmouthing her, saying she can't be trusted etc.

lisa telling it as it is to mario just now. discussing rex, rebecca, darnell, rachel, mikey, jen and dale and she is good at it and fair. mario just sitting there and agreeing more or less

apparently jen said she'd stop doing the task and not care if they fail if she is up for eviction. totally believe she said it but she is still in her outfit just now

I like rachel.

Lisa is a gorgeous woman. Shame her surgeries and tattooed make-up and dress sense ruin it.

Today I'm loving that Evicted Steph is showing she isn't anything at all like Chanelle, and isn't trying to get any of her fame or copy her in any way at all, by going out with Ziggy.

Last night's episode was pretty lol, esp the fishwater.

Luke's a real little creep though, I don't think he's going to be Glyn 2, he's too snide and bitchy.

I liked that they volunteered to be the seals, but it turned out to be the shittest.

yeah luke is totally a poisonous sneak and I will be glad to see him go but at least he is not objectionably stupid

I do find him quite funny sometimes tho, but always feel a bit guilty because he is a poisonous little sneak as you say.

Bex is truly despicable, bringing shame on the whole of the West Midlands. And she looks like Stimpy.

http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3048/2633325917_6aab5f8402_o.jpg

haha, I agree on both counts

"and my other uncle, the hairy baboon has spanked me, but not as hard as that bisexual python."

Loving the torture of the seals. They didn't seem to realise the more they bitched about it, the more often the song was going to go off.

on reflection rebecca doesn't deserve eviction

what's mario's problem?

also mario on kat is a lot like a fucking horrible cunt

yes

eviction's too good for her?

he is given to partisan prickery despite his mature age and its accompanying wisdom

too good yes

http://image.guardian.co.uk/sys-images/Guardian/Pix/arts/2005/07/19/AJohnsonsx.jpg

an amalgamation of all the housemates

yeah, Mikey's riffing on that poem seemed classic, shame it got edited down.

Unless those were the best bits and the rest was bobbins.

Surprising amount of hate for it on BB forums, saying he deliberately tried to fail the task. To me, it was something the pair of them were never going to pass (and 140-odd mistakes when they were only allowed 6 seems to bear this out) so he just had fun with it.

Oh and good on him. These twats need to relax slightly.

Darnell was awesome last night.

three new ladies

Going in tonight? They should send them in at exactly the same time as Jennifer leaves, so she passes them on the stairs.

Darnell was awesome last night.

-- nate woolls, Friday, 4 July 2008 19:03 (8 minutes ago) Bookmark Link

When cookie monster said carrots improve your eyesight and skin, and Darnell said 'oh goody, now I can see and I'm black.' <3 <3 <3 <3

Yep, and: "If Mikey was to fly a fighter jet, now that would be a feat!"

Darnell belongs on the excelsior thread!