Fetishisation of old man boozers

you don't drink beer.

ah man i haven't the energy for this

is that a "HEY GUYZ I'M GETTING LAYYYYYED" post?

you don't drink beer.

-- banriquit, Monday, 23 June 2008 14:03 (1 minute ago) Bookmark Link

I might have a bottle of Nastro Azzuro with my meal every now and then, but no, I don't normally.

I think it's because they're middle class cunts, but I'm only guessing

It's really simple, journo-scum.

1. Carling until you're sick of lager
2. Strongbow until you're sick of beer
3. Random alcopops/shorts&mixers combos
4. ?
5. Headache, remorse etc

I don't understand what the title of this thread has to do with the three things Tony Naylor wants. Unless old mans boozers in London are a very different beast to the ones up north and in Scotland.

Actually 3a) should read "Lean over people playing on the triv machine and shout right answers at them even tho they're only really playing to impress their girlfs".

I don't know any media types

I know some GEEZERS - if any of them could be bothered to respond to this then you might have your answers

but seems a category mistake to me:
"a decent selection of continental beers and lagers" != old-man-boozer. the original quotation doesn't seem to have much to do with spit / sawdust mythology. I don't even know what Jever is. and come to think of it, a genuine old-time boozer wouldn't have any music at all, save a piano perhaps.

(x-post, then: Billy Dods and I agree)

I am completely guilty of this

'disingenious'?

hang on. i fucking HATE yates's and edwards('?) and reflex. they're full of faux-lads in shirt-sleeves, kidding themselves they're having a good time while trying to chat up a bored temp over several thousand decibels of five-year-old compilation-CD detritus. i also like hand-pumped beer, often from odd breweries in the middle of nowhere.

THAT SAID: this naylor dude sounds like a fucking knob. music: i'd rather not have it AT ALL in a pub. i go to the pub to meet friends and talk. i listen to music the other 90% of the time. anyone who uses the phrase "non-chart" to imply perceived superiority = a cunt.

"scruffy people": hmm. what the fuck does that mean? it's not like i put on my fucking tuxedo when i pop out for a half, but i do like to make a *bit* of an effort.

"a decent selection of continental beers and lagers": you don't know the first thing about beer, do you? for all that i relish the taste of old badger's scrotum when i'm in the mood, there are many occasions when nothing but a good ol' pint of tennent's will hit the spot. i used to dick about drinking daft imported stuff, then realised our national brew is about as good as it gets.

4. ?

HAHAHAHAHAH fuck me, that is perfect. perfect.

faux-lads in shirt-sleeves, kidding themselves they're having a good time while trying to chat up a bored temp over several thousand decibels of five-year-old compilation-CD detritus

lbzc: everybody hates us, we don't care

It's a shame you guys feel like this because old man boozers tend to look quite favourably on dudes sitting on their own, weeping bitter tears into their pints.

faux-lads in shirt-sleeves, kidding themselves they're having a good time while trying to chat up a bored temp over several thousand decibels of five-year-old compilation-CD detritus

This is my Friday night basically but I don't think I'm kidding myself.

I don't understand what the title of this thread has to do with the three things Tony Naylor wants. Unless old mans boozers in London are a very different beast to the ones up north and in Scotland.

-- Billy Dods, Monday, 23 June 2008 13:10 (5 minutes ago) Bookmark Link

OTM. Dom have you ever been in a pub? Like an actual pub?

faux-lads in shirt-sleeves, kidding themselves they're having a good time while trying to chat up a bored temp over several thousand decibels of five-year-old compilation-CD detritus

lbzc: everybody hates us, we don't care

-- banriquit, Monday, 23 June 2008 14:14 (4 minutes ago) Bookmark Link

http://ecx.images-amazon.com/images/I/51BGGTEBKYL._SS500_.jpg

^^^#1 Lloyd's jam

if 'old man boozers' = 'anything that's not a wetherspoons' then i'm all for them

DC that is funny!

ok well why don't we do a charing cross road FAP, go to Lloyd's then to The Cambridge, see who complains

DG yes but actually Wetherspoons do a better range of ales than most places

http://www.trailerhappiness.com/

^^^Passantino's favourite bar. And that's a shoot.

Not going defend said fetishization of "old man" bars (here more probably called "dive bars" when they aren't much of one, or not anymore), but it's maybe shorthand for someplace that doesn't mix fancy cocktails (cf the Sex In the City-led fad for cosmopolitans and calling everything a whatever-tini) and can be counted on never to be playing, I dunno, club or Madonna remixes, or whatever. That said, a lot of bars that aren't really very good or very old-mannish or very divey probably still qualify.

Wetherspoons is far more old man boozer than bangin' Hed Kandi type boozer. CAMRA bores heart them and there'll ALWAYS be at least three or four old soaks outside every Wetherspoons at 11am waiting for it to open.

Interestingly, B.S. Johnson appears to rate the Nottingham Yates' in The Unfortunates. It was written in the 1960s, though.

Or at least there were before Wetherspoons started serving breakfast, anyway. Probably there even earlier now.

Ahem. You can get in the Wetherspoons here at 9am. The clientele and atmos then are fucking ace.

I think stickman's actually getting at CAMRA types rather than what most of us think of as Old Man Pubs.

I refuse to drink in any bar that has more than three types of beer on tap, tbh.

Old Man boozers in my neck of the woods sell the following types of beer:
"lager" (almost exclusively Tennents)
"heavy" (usually Tennents 70/- Doesn't really matter as no cunt drinks it any more, not even the old men)
"cider" (Strongbow)
Guinness

It's a shame you guys feel like this because old man boozers tend to look quite favourably on dudes sitting on their own, weeping bitter tears into their pints.

-- Matt DC, Monday, June 23, 2008 2:16 PM (7 minutes ago) Bookmark Link

DC that is funny!

-- the pinefox, Monday, June 23, 2008 2:21 PM (2 minutes ago) Bookmark Link

it's more o_O tbh, but well done with the nu-ilx lack of snark guys.

Good Snark/Bad Snark Manicheism = The Future

Snarking to your face rather than behind your back, nothing wrong with that. What is this, Cuddlestein Mountain?

There's a dude outside the High Holborn one in a wheelchair with the sort of angry aggressive expression on his face that makes me think he lost both legs in a war or something. He's there every morning and can usually be seen wheeling down the street later shouting at people.

REAL TALK: my dream job is as editor of Wetherspoon's magazine. The banality of that publication fascinates me, as does the fact that every issue has an interview with either Shaggy or Phil Tufnell.

is that a HMHB lyric

Tried to go in the Wetherspoons on Clerkenwell Road after Fabric a few times but doesn't open early enough. Columbia Rd area has a few of these kind of pubs which are good for that kind of time

I've been looking for a London bar for ages that's like a straight-down-the-line unfussy, unflashy rectangular New York bar, without much success. Think Freud's is the closest I've found but god too many hipsters.

I got paid today and now I'm gonna have to go out aren't I youse bastards? (Touch wood it's super-cheapo student night in my local)

i have an in-built hatred of wetherspoons from many, many years ago, when i got told off for smoking near -- not even at! just near! -- the bar.

This is my Friday night basically but I don't think I'm kidding myself

yeh, but you're old enough to know better, and that makes it OK :)

Fucked if I ever go in a pub that has less than three beers on taps, they're probably all lagers.

Lager > beer, and that's realest of talk. If you want something that's flat and warm, drink fucking tea.

Tea doesn't get you pissed, though.

rectangular?

would it be OK if it had more, or fewer sides?

maybe you should go to Frevd's with Suzy, that would keep you safe from hipsters

Man if you could develop alcoholic tea that actually tasted like tea, this country would be back in Victorian gin squalor within six months.

the choice between lager and beer (<nasal>actually, lager IS beer; what we really mean is "ale"</smashed, bleeding nasal>) depends on a whole shitheap of variables: the weather, the company, the time of day, intangible mood-related stuff. i couldn't say one's "better" than the other. which is better: italian or greek food? depends, dunnit?

Beer's a seasonal drink for me, lager in the summer, ale in winter.

Which one gets you pissed quicker, Italian or Greek?

Man if you could develop alcoholic tea that actually tasted like tea, this country would be back in Victorian gin squalor within six months.

-- Matt DC, Monday, 23 June 2008 14:40 (1 minute ago) Bookmark Link

Isn't tea with a shot of gin in called "Tea frog"?

Lager > beer, and that's realest of talk. If you want something that's flat and warm, drink fucking tea.

Spoken like a true barcadi and coke connoisseur lager lad, hey.

freud's bar staff are very unfussy about the whole world.

i agree that lager > beer and also think coke > soft drinks, and tables > furniture

i had a great night at a wetherspoons once, the one near the betsey, for some reason they had karaoke there?? PLUS it was curry club. so ate cheap curry drank those um lovely jugs of cocktails and sang. it was a truly retrosexual experience.

Which one gets you pissed quicker, Italian or Greek?

LBZC drinking contest agogo

Recommend this pub for great selection of ales if you are ever in thelocale

http://www.beerknurd.com/store.sub.php?store=5&sub=beer&groupby=name

Pretty sure Cyprus belongs to the Turkey, LJ.

Recommend this pub for great selection of ales if you are ever in thelocale

http://www.beerknurd.com/store.sub.php?store=5&sub=beer&groupby=name

-- cherry blossom, Monday, 23 June 2008 14:45 (25 seconds ago) Bookmark Link

lol at "Bud Light"

I drink trappist beers with old Flemish men

Fun fact: once spent two months working in an English pub. Never learnt a fucking thing about bartending.

Ken, I hope it wasn't sexual in any way

agree about the tables though

True that genetically and culturally Cypriots generally share far more with Turkey than Greece but I wouldn't be caught be my grandparents saying that.

Yes I thought that was funny too! I like the Cottonwood best

A grappa v ouzo drinking contest is one of the most unpleasant things I can imagine.

we need an ILX mega-fap. with greek food. well, ok: kebabs.

noodle: didn't you and i suggest an all-day drinking session on a thread somewhere long ago?

GOD DAMN i am sitting in the university library and suddenly i am DESPERATE FOR A PINT :(

A grappa v ouzo drinking contest is one of the most unpleasant things I can imagine.

-- Matt DC, Monday, 23 June 2008 14:48 (27 seconds ago) Bookmark Link

You talk shit about grappa, and you're gonna wake up at the dentist(TM)

Fun fact: once spent two months working in an English pub. Never learnt a fucking thing about bartending.

You and every other citizen of your country.

Grim: Yes. Shit still needs to be done at some point.

with greek food

I will say this: Turkish food >>>>>>>>>>>>>> Greek food

(also, Cypriot food IS Turkish food, on the whole)

You and every other citizen of your country.

Not true, we have a range of fine citizens working as temps in offices around the place. Who else would come to drink the pubs we run?

The other day I discovered that a large donner kebab with mayo contains the same amount of calories as three Big Macs.

xp

Yeah, but why choose when you could eat both?

Mayo on a kebab is fucking wrong btw.

we need an ILX mega-fap. with greek food. well, ok: kebabs.

please only have this happen on kebab day

http://www.ilxor.com/ILX/ThreadSelectedControllerServlet?boardid=40&threadid=43393

I'm more a souvlaki man than a donner man, my Greek loyalty shining through

one doner and three big macs vs two world wars and one world cup

Some of the doners I've eaten in France have been completely dope, surprisingly.

you can get one of those in camden

Mayo on a kebab is fucking wrong btw.

-- Noodle Vague, Monday, 23 June 2008 14:53 (2 minutes ago) Bookmark Link

No, because then you put the garlic/special sauce on your chips.

The things a Cypriot can do with marinaded pork bring poetry to my lips

^^^fully aware that this is ripe for LZBC reinterpretation

See, I wrap pieces of doner meat and salad round the chips and that solves everything.

*LBZC

See, I wrap pieces of doner meat and salad round the chips and that solves everything.

-- Noodle Vague, Monday, 23 June 2008 14:57 (15 seconds ago) Bookmark Link

R.I.P. George Carlin, dead of heart failure and sublime profanity at 71

Noodle Vague on choice: funny!

Ken on dope: ditto!

I have come to enjoy Ken's wide-eyed humour.

Why?

are there any British beers where the label indicates whether the bottle has been properly chilled or not?

Yeah, Carling started doing that on their bottles or cans or something. The others have this system whereby you touch the bottle and see if it's cold or not.

Bottles that tell you when they're cold is like those frying pans with the red dot in the middle that tell you when they're hot: over-elaborate solution to not much of a problem.

i am disappointed that pinefox doesn't call affect to call them 'vague' and 'c'.

xposts to FPS

a lot of people call him Chu I suppose, but I have always liked to call him Kenneth

Vague could well be called Vague, but it might sound like I was saying that someone was being vague.

Chu could have been a brazilliant draught beer

a century of Chukers

the past team of the Italie

I am trying to encourage Kenneth

I think Ken isn't allowed to use Chu any more because it's a registered trademark of John Prescott's favourite eating/bowking emporium.

The very whiff of an OMB sure gives me a boner.

The balmy weather sure getting to ILX today

I hear say Johnny was a baker
I hear say Johnny used to live in Jamaica
I heard he had three daughters,
one named Brown Paper
But that is all they know about Johnny Baker

In other news - having a preference for certain things now = a fetish.

I thought a boozer was a person, not a place. Fucking britishes.

Fetishization of old man boosers

i thought british was an adjective not a noun.

haha, fair.

see Ken is ON FIRE

I like remembering my father as an old man and his boozing.

I thought a boozer was a person, not a place

it's both. i've actually seen a sentence somewhere that riffs on this, eg: "look at that stinking old boozer standing in that stinking old boozer." probably in "viz", to be honest. most significant things in my life involve "viz".

viz. booze

in my experience old man bars have truly terrible choice of beers