Transformers 2: Revenge of the Fallen: It's never too early for anticipation!

Forget about elections, Russia, Iran, North Korea, Hadron, climate change, credit crunches, what you are gonna have for lunch, faltering relationships, your annoying co-workers and etc., for a while. Come anticipate next years MOST AWESOME film event!

Ice-cream truck combiner! OMG!!!

Oh dear! REVENGE OF THE FALLEN (/suggest ban)

7 CONSTRUCTICONS = 1 badass Devastator

http://www.tfw2005.com/transformers-news/transformers-movie-9/devastator-confirmed-for-transformers-revenge-of-the-fallen-165770/

Is it going to be even more boring than the first one? I can't wait for my leg to fall asleep again!

no dinobots no cred

http://mattgunn.files.wordpress.com/2007/08/megatron_large.jpg

"Feel the WRATH of my bom-BAST!"

I'm opposed to the proliferation of Autobots as they put container drivers out of work.

Trailer here: http://movies.yahoo.com/movie/1809943432/trailer

According to wiki, Soundwave and the Constructicons are in this. Hopefully there will be more focus on the robots this time, but i doubt it.

my friend is working on this. she says Michael Bay is a horrible person to work for.

Horrible person makes horrible films shocker.

OK, having watched the trailer, looks as ineptly filmed as the first one, plus stars the same irritating humans! Will half of the running time be devoted to C-grade high school movie antics like last time? I won't be paying to find out.

i think that's exactly what this sequel appears to be.

Same old sfx and transformer motion as last time, which was fun on the first watch - but didn't stand up to any repeated viewing due to wafer thin everything-else.

It looks like it's going to be a horrible combination of 'Armageddon' and 'War of the Worlds'. I'd have thought Spielberg would know better.

Meantime they've alleged already booked an opening date for the third one in 2011.

can't get excited until i know all the talent from the first two are back for da 3rd

Mike Patton to play either Mixmaster or Long Haul.

"where's the "Evidence", puny fleshling?"

Can a moderate person please change the Fall to Fallen?

This film will be awesome on many levels, and sunk on many levels too. Jetfire as an old guy with a stick is just awful. Arcee dies early on. Sideswipe! Ravage! 60 robots in total!

I'm also kinda anticipating GI Joe too.

thanks!

Are there any fan-made TF movies that are better than this? please post them if they exist. surely desktop consumer nerd-level CG is up to the task by now.

my bandmate is hard at work on this. she has been keeping a jar of bay leaves on her desk in anticipation of the end of her 70+ hr work weeks

bay leaves???

like Michael Bay Leaves?

nice

oh, and Wheelie is a remote control car. Which means there will be a toy that is the same size as the 'real' Wheelie, which is just great...shame it's Wheelie though.

He's a total doucher from what she tells me

x-post

please explain the bay leaves because right now i'm picturing a pagan ritual in which keeping bay leaves in a jar inflicts supernatural harm upon michael bay.

*sigh*

its a reminder to herself that some day, Michael BAY will LEAVE and the date that BAY LEAVES will be a relief for her

He's a total doucher from what she tells me

x-post

― This Board is a Prison on Planet Bullshit (Shakey Mo Collier), Monday, April 6, 2009 7:28 PM (7 minutes ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

hey don't fall into the trap of thinking that because someone's creative work is worthwhile that therefore they're a nice person.

hmm don't think I ever shared either of those misconceptions about Michael Bay

What other pun-based totems has your bandmate made in tribute of nightmare bosses?

hmm don't think I ever shared either of those misconceptions about Michael Bay

But they're such fun.

during her tenure in the Bush administration... xp

man, i'm so distraugt to have my nice-guy illusions about michael bay shattered

god, who cares

i hated the first one so much - tonal balance was off, twas hard to tell what was happening at any given moment, etc.

the trailer i saw before 'star trek' has the most shamelessly porny intro shot of megan fox. anyway this movie predictably looks horrible. spielberg should spend his producing time on better projects imo.

I saw the first one drunk, and it really smoothed out all the awful scenes that involved talking.

no that didn't really help. but still for some reason i kind of anticipate this. might be related to shamelessly porny shots obviously.

lolz my friend at ILM just asked me for a list of "songs about cars and/or robots"

just list the complete Kraftwerk discography

em...maybe not all of it

Btw Megan Fox not hot enough to make me want to see this. First one was bleh.

i like this trailer better than the one upthread

(double-click to view)

blerk, I can't believe film makers are still using that 'meteorite smashing through a building' effect, so fucking over done now. not to mention the rest of the tired and yawnsome effects visible on that trailer.

i don't care. i want to see this movie. (good point on the meteorite thing tho, hmmm)

The first film was great!

The meteorite thing is all propaganda, so that when we do get hit by one we'll be all "ho hum a meteorite, been there, done that"...

great?

yes, all it lacked was Nic Cage.

yes. great.
when you go to a movie expecting to see robots fighting and explosions, and what you get is robots fighting and explosions - you have is a great move right there.

^*what* you have...

i hated the first one when i saw it but upon repeat viewings on cable it grew on me. not great but fun and the battle scenes are pretty dope

i found it way too silly to hate.

i dunno, fellas

ilx will do weird things to folks

like what

bad movies are good, cats sleeping with dogs, cankles banned while gabbneb roams free

make them hate robots and explosions.

xpost

never said it was good!

nor did i, technically.

nothing wrong with enjoying a stoopid movie

i kinda wish they would drop the annoying actors and just have robots blowing shit up, and also make the robots' dialogue not worse than their dialogue even on the show.

booooo - ilx won't let me change my name to "The Cursed Explosion of the Dastardly Robot"

More importantly, what will be the subtitle for Transmorphers 2?!?!?

when you go to a movie expecting to see robots fighting and explosions, and what you get is robots fighting and explosions - you have is a great move right there.

I'd agree, if what you actually got wasn't 2/3 some shithouse high school comedy, and 1/3 robots fighting and explosions filmed so badly that it makes no sense.

Never saw the first one because every time Michael Bay makes a movie that I think I'll enjoy as cheesecake fun I just end up getting pissed that he can't set up a film shot worth anything and can't edit. Would I enjoy it with heavy drinking?

with heavy drinking you'll just vomit sooner than you would if you were sober

reading my mind omar, I almost mentioned wanting to vomit at scene cuts in The Island

BTW, I know the world is convinced Megan Fox is super-hot, but the fact that SHE so obviously thinks she is super-hot drastically undercuts any putative hotness, imo. Feel free to throw rubbish at me.

The majority of super hot women think they are super hot.

society must endeavor lower their self esteem more!

got no problems w/megan fox, she's like the new jane russell

She's completely peng but even her pulchritude can't convince me to watch this shit.

i think she's vv sharp or has a vv sharp publicist. i remember her telling a mag some story about how when she first arrived in l.a. she was in love with some unnamed superhot female stripper for awhile.

0:27 ftw

oh my

"she was in love with some unnamed superhot female stripper for awhile"
this movie sounds much better -- where is the trailer for this?

Boy, I really hope that sequence of him at college lasts for at least half the film. Looks fascinating. "I feel smarter already." Hilarious!

Michael Bay's close personal journey. And some spoilers if you care at all.

Bay said the film, overall, is darker than its 2007 predecessor. "This one," Bay said, "is less quippy."

really not that bothered about this which is strange considering how much i anticipated and generally enjoyed the first

Sometimes you hope against hope, and then Michael Bay tramples all over your dreams.

* Optimus Prime would never shoot a defenceless/beaten Decepticon in the head. They lost me after 15 minutes.
* They got a swine flu joke in.
* Jetfire said "Bollocks", I thought he was talking about the movie.
* The Twins = so annoying! I might not even buy the ice-cream truck toy when it comes out now.
* I guess the pretender, evil college girl was quite a good idea.
* Couldn't stand most of the stuff with Sam and his family and Megan Fox.
* Ravage was quite cool.
* Devestator, so disappointing, get's knocked off a pyramid by some stupid laser.
* The Fallen aka the Emperor from Star Wars, even called Megatron "My apprentice". Well the Fallen was pretty useless, and looked pretty crap.
* They pretty much didn't use Sideswipe, and you could tell Jolt was a last minute addition.
* Why didn't the Decepticons just build there sun-destroying thingie on Mars? As always most Decepticon plans are rubbish, and they can't shoot straight.

I am writing the treatment for the next film, I'm going to base it on the episode when Grapple and Hoist get fed up with all the fighting and go off and start building stuff. Or maybe I'll make it more like "Beachcomber's Cove".

Losing the jel vote = the movie is doomed.

And what of Soundwave?

He floated around in space in coitus with a satellite.

now i'm sold

My gut feeling is that this movie definitely has the potential to be even worse than the first one.

Oh Michael, so sensitive:

We've obtained an email dated May 4, 2009 -- from Bay to Paramount head Brad Grey, along with a bunch of other Paramount honchos. Bay complains bitterly that Paramount's ad campaign for "Transformers 2" was tepid and ineffective.

"... I have been waiting, and waiting for the anticipation of an 'event movie' to make it into the 'public zeitgeist,'" Bay writes.

Bay calls the print campaign an "abject failure," with a "pathetic presence" in the L.A. Times. He's especially pissed about the profile of the movie on the MTV Video Awards, calling it "so lame."

But here's the best part. Bay name-drops Jerry Bruckheimer, saying Jerry always told him "a studio that does not make (the opening of a movie) an event ... will get bitten in the ass." He then adds, "Besides my good friend Steven (Spielberg), Jerry has made a lot more successful movies then (sic) all of us."

Bay then asks, sarcastically, "Is this is a cash issue with your company?"

In fairness, on June 6, Bay clearly had a change of heart, sending an email to Grey and others at Paramount, praising them for treating him well, adding ..."Paramount is like family. Thank you all for busting your butts and bringing your 'A game' for the release of Transformers."

May they all die of overdoses

i saw a clip where megan fox fights off a tiny decepticon, which calls her a "bitch" right before she traps it in a toolbox.

lolz @ Bay saying he's going to make an art film without any explosions next, cuz its "easier"

i'm a little captivated by the idea that michael bay has been a slumming artiste all this time

from criterion essay on armageddon by his old film school teacher:
" In history/theory, he listened intently, but said little, speaking mostly to ask keen questions or to deal with what he felt was nonsense from his peers. But in film production classes, he was the Road Runner, taking off on his own, needing little guidance. His senior film, Benjamin’s Birthday, won Wesleyan’s Frank Capra Prize for Best Film, and it was definitely what we now know as a “Michael Bay Film.” It was funny. It was fast. And it featured a very ritzy yellow Porsche. It told its story clearly, but in a highly nonverbal manner. Bay was ahead of his age group, but he was also ahead of his time. He still is."

anyone know more about his pre-hollywood stuff?

quite the catastrophe for paramount

Michael Bay is in serious damage control/pre-emptive strike mode here. Like the minute this leaks he's going to blame the internet for lost sales.

As for promotion, when I go out in public Transformers 2 is almost at the saturation point where I think 'Man I am sick of this shit'. Any more and you would really ruin it, dude.

Just read a bunch of reviews (Rottentomatoes gives average 37%) and I'm wondering if this is maybe so-bad-it's-good. Has anyone seen it? If i go with my dad to a drive-in for some ridiculous summer movie fun will we regret it?

Ugh man, 2 1/2 hours? Fuck this...

this movie broke me.

My wife inexplicably liked the first one and is demanding that we go see this, I've run out of arguments to convince her not to. I've forwarded her every article about how abysmal this is supposed to be, but to no avail so far. May god have mercy on my soul.

As with the first one, I'm going to wait until the RiffTrax version

the little robot is Wheelie, at one stage he humps Megan Fox's leg.

o_O

Everything about this film was revolting and wrong, and I liked the first one.

Some kids in the cinema clapped at the end. They were too young for irony.

did this thread say "transmorphers" at one point or did i imagine that?

There's a transmorphers one too!

Transmorphers 2: Fall of Man: It's never too early for anticipation!

lets stick with that one!

this movie broke me.

― gabb 'bag (s1ocki), Tuesday, 23 June 2009 14:58

were u transformed

or merely... transmorphed

YYYYYYYYYYYYYYYEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

what would happen if i tried to see this, terminator and up one after the other in one day. would i die of cgi

you see a transformer's testes in this movie ;_;

lol does it transform into a muffler

i can't shake the image :(

it they

it drove u nuts?

i didnt have a ball

maybe u should hit the sack

http://www.emofaces.com/en/emoticons/d/drumming-emoticon-drum-kit.gif

y'all are nuts

o wait

d'oh

fuck this film for dashing my hopes of ever getting one faithful to the badness of the TV series, not just a crappy new kind of bad

you can always watch the old show

Isn't consumer-level CG good enough for fans to make their own superior versions yet?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xelI8h_mct0&feature=related

Totally, but i think the desire to make a CGI Transformers (even fan-directed) is diminished once you see these...

Hate to say it but TF fan output is completely outclassed by fan-based Harry Potter works. Isn't there even a fan-based LOTR prequel that's supposed to be pretty good? Shame.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J-A4E47V53Q

ebert's review is hilarious (thx to ally for showing me this)
http://rogerebert.suntimes.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=%2F20090623%2FREVIEWS%2F906239997

They take their son away to Princeton, apparently a party school, where Judy eats some pot and goes berserk. Later they swoop down out of the sky on Egypt, for reasons the movie doesn't make crystal clear, so they also can run in slo-mo from explosions.

bay's got this weird combination of filming his material in the most serious, epic way possible and then having the material itself be the most juvenile shit possible, but since the two elements are mutually exclusive you can't even say it's a joke.

but is it 'art'?

would a Bay vs Emmerich poll be worth doing? don't answer this btw

lol I found myself stuck amid the London premiere of this

megan fox says she's sorry about the flower btw

which is worse, this or the new terminator?

that's like sophie's choice but tragic

i suppose terminator is at least short

(i am never going to see transformers)

what is worse transformers or year one?

it's like if sophie was asked which nazi she wanted to die and could only choose 1

sophie's decision

sophie's big day

unless i'm forgetting something, this has been a pretty awful summer for movies so far. i think the only film i've enjoyed in cinemas was drag me to hell.

sophie arrives at a crossroads

sophie's pick

sophie's pick o'the day

sophie's nom

you see a transformer's testes in this movie ;_;

― gabb 'bag (s1ocki), Tuesday, June 23, 2009 4:59 PM (4 hours ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink
lol does it transform into a muffler

― am0n, Tuesday, June 23, 2009 5:00 PM (4 hours ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink
i can't shake the image :(

― gabb 'bag (s1ocki), Tuesday, June 23, 2009 5:01 PM (4 hours ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

if u posted this on the stealth thread it would've seemed a compliment

I enjoyed "Star Trek" and that's about it IIRC; I don't even remember what other movies I've seen this year.

yeah Star Trek was great

lolz my bandmate walked the red carpet for this, apparently

same writers!

kinda

"writers"

but yeah its true

"writers"

oh those "writers"

which one chose to write about Transformer nutsacks, I think is the critical question that must be answered so we know precisely whom to stop

the "writers" who "wrote" the "film"

"today i choose to write about a transformer's nards. i choose this."

^^^ sophie

sophie's real choice

sophie's choice of ballsack

Their accents are Brooklyese, British and hip-hop, as befits a race from the distant stars. Their appearance looks like junkyard throw-up. They are dumb as a rock.

Magnificent.

sophie's chode

I'm still reeling from hearing about the 150 minute run time.

not long enough

a lot of "reels" are needed for 150 min

"150 minutes"

unless there are already epically long and boring "backstory" sections?....

how much backstory do you need to explain why we are looking at Deceptitaint?

Deceptisac

what a disaster for the wga

"w"ga

http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_C7Ojr4OIXWQ/SE54WzqGVlI/AAAAAAAAAPk/gtklyW5E5U8/s400/swb251lt.jpg

All of this was foretold by the May 9 email, which was cocky-bastard for "I know you're cold-shouldering his movie because it's awful but plz force it down some throats for me or I will be peevish about sharing my talent with you in the future."

REVENGE OF THE FAILIN' amirite

LaBeouf suffered a serious hand injury in a car crash away from the set that almost derailed production, until Bay ordered his star a transparent Kevlar cast

"The problem was if he jammed his fingers, he could lose his fingers forever, so we had experts of the world come up with this design," Bay said.

After shutting down production for just a day, Bay found a way to work LaBeouf's hurt hand into the story.

Megan Fox, who reprised her role as LaBeouf's girlfriend, said the cast "drank a lot" to relax after 16-hour days on the set. Bay insisted shoots were limited to 12-hour days.

Action scenes meant the actors had to do a lot of running -- much of it through desert sand in Jordan and Egypt.

Many of their sprints were through real blasts, including one that landed in the Guinness Book of World Records.

"We made history, the biggest practical explosion in the history of filmmaking that included the actors," said Tyrese Gibson, who played a U.S. Air Force sergeant.

http://www.cnn.com/2009/SHOWBIZ/Movies/06/23/ent.transformers.movie/index.html

i was wondering why he was shlepping around a cast for half of it

i love that bay is functionally illiterate

bay's got this weird combination of filming his material in the most serious, epic way possible and then having the material itself be the most juvenile shit possible, but since the two elements are mutually exclusive you can't even say it's a joke.

― "jesus on the cross seems like classic homoerotic imagery" (omar little), Tuesday, June 23, 2009 5:26 PM (47 minutes ago) Bookmark

Part of me now wishes for Michael Bay to go the 'art film' route and end up making Transformers 3 anyways but it being some Matthew Barney-esque pomo astronomically-expensive video art behemoth. Having no dialog or plot at all, and shit like slow motion explosions, shot with a single camera that last 5 minutes and have the most beautiful classical score ever underneath it all. It is 5 hours long and has an intermission during which the audience is treated to tasteful b&w photography of US military equipment. Heck, Megan Fox can be brought back to straddle the line between art and porn.

Yeah, i know 'this one doesnt have much of a plot' but i'm saying, Michael, it's not working, just forget it completely. Focus on capturing blockbuster juvenile abstract expressionism.

omg please please let that movie become real

i want to be an expert of the world

also xp yeah would see that

~~~~on weed~~~~~~~

this movie is already basically a matthew barney piece complete with dangling testes fetish

i mean seriously your version just sounds longer... i do not want that

maybe i will see this

I'm certain I will see this but now I am also certain I will hate it just like I hated "Terminator: Salvation".

Bay says he’s sick of receiving negative reviews from critics who dislike his movie-making style and is determined to move away from the genre. He says, “It’s easy to go shoot an art movie in a winery in the South of France. But people have no idea how hard it is to create something like Transformers. They review me before they’ve even seen the movie.”

And Bay admits that if film bosses give the go ahead for a third Transformers movie, they will have to find a different director. He adds, “After the three and a half years I’ve spent making these movies, I feel like I’ve had enough of the Transformers world. I need to do something totally divergent, something without any explosions.”

boo to intermissions but wld see w/more explosions

Okay, intermission is one explosion shot at 6,000,000 frames a second with this
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/science/nature/8025211.stm

Whatever went wrong with John Turturro. From Barton Fink to Adam Sandler movies and this sort of rancid shit.

http://www.coolclockstore.com/store/images/PIMP%20NECKLACE%20Bling%20Bling%20CCS.jpg

that's a really non-blinged-out bling bling clock necklace

sorry about that

1:44

time to get blingy

Part of me now wishes for Michael Bay to go the 'art film' route and end up making Transformers 3 anyways but it being some Matthew Barney-esque pomo astronomically-expensive video art behemoth. Having no dialog or plot at all, and shit like slow motion explosions, shot with a single camera that last 5 minutes and have the most beautiful classical score ever underneath it all. It is 5 hours long and has an intermission during which the audience is treated to tasteful b&w photography of US military equipment. Heck, Megan Fox can be brought back to straddle the line between art and porn.

A Michael Bay porno would be cut and edited so fast that nobody would be able to tell who was lying on top of whom (something for the pansexual, sure, but for everybody else?).

Also, potential titles for Bay porn would include, naturally: The Cock, Armageddon Me Some Head, and Bad Boys

Shia LaBeouf says a third Transformers film would be "darker" than the first two movies.

A follow up to 2007's Transformers and new film Transformers: Revenge Of The Fallen hasn't been confirmed, but if there is a third flick, the actor revealed it's likely to raise the stakes.

He said: "It will be darker, something crazy will happen, someone has to die."

Shia, who plays Sam Witwicky, said he expects a third Transformers film would carry the action beyond Earth and become "more of an intergalactic thing".

Director Michael Bay revealed he'd be on board to make another movie in the franchise - but he wants some time off first.

"I will do it, but you've got to give us time," he said. "I need a little rest."

"more of an intergalactic thing"

um, no thanks.

that's the only thing that could save it

Pearl Harder

Robots In Deez Guys

http://moviefill.com/Michael-Bay-Quitting-Action-Movies-17109/

are those the transformer balls above bay in that pic?

lol ebert:

Aware that this movie opened in England seven hours before Chicago time and the morning papers would be on the streets, after writing the above I looked up the first reviews as a reality check. I was reassured: "Like watching paint dry while getting hit over the head with a frying pan!" (Bradshaw, Guardian); "Sums up everything that is most tedious, crass and despicable about modern Hollywood!" (Tookey, Daily Mail); "A giant, lumbering idiot of a movie!" (Edwards, Daily Mirror). The first American review, Todd Gilchrist of Cinematical, reported that Bay's "ambition runs a mile long and an inch deep," but, in a spirited defense, says "this must be the most movie I have ever experienced." He is bullish on the box office: it "feels destined to be the biggest movie of all time." It’s certainly the biggest something of all time.

Surely Pearl Harbor 2: Pearl Harder

5-hour art-movie behemoth about intergalactic war seriously needs to happen, now

i prefer jel's proposal tbh

5-hour art-movie behemoth about intergalactic war seriously needs to happen, now

― Guy de & (country matters), Wednesday, June 24, 2009 12:30 PM (2 minutes ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

gah this is so not funny and would be so terrible... be careful what u wish 4

The Bi-Land

i mean i'm pretty sure that's how george lucas describes the star wars prequels

Celine And Julie Go Starcruising

oh come on Lucas knows he's not making "art movies"

Thelma & Louise In Space

more like fart movies, if you ask me

http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3304/3573109099_1c7bff17e4_o.jpg

just out of curiosity what would 30 mins of (bad) CG cost to make?

pretty sure you can make 8-bit graphics for practically free lolz

like art student demo reel quality i mean

i.e. are any of you art students and willing to make a TF knockoff movie for cheap?

dude we already have Transmorphers how many cheap knockoffs do you need?

seriously

this idea is not funny and everyone should stop thinking about it immediately

I just realised! The film I saw must have been Go-Bots: The Movie.

god i hated them

The Fallen, The Twins and Arcee are totally based on Go-Bots, and that crappy Demolisher thing (the thing with a head between two wheels). Starscream looks like a Go-Bot too.

Film 3, the REAL transformers arrive, and blast all the fakes to bits.

"We have chased these fakes all across the universe, we can only apologise for the damage and misery they have caused"

seriously

this idea is not funny and everyone should stop thinking about it immediately

― gabb 'bag (s1ocki), Wednesday, June 24, 2009 12:51 PM

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Thoughtcrime

The Thought Police use psychology and omnipresent surveillance to find and eliminate members of society who are capable of the mere thought of challenging ruling authority.[2]

^^ these guys are OTM

i.e. are any of you art students and willing to make a TF knockoff movie for cheap?
― Philip Nunez, Wednesday, June 24, 2009 12:48 PM (2 hours ago) Bookmark

Blender 3D is open source and free and I bet it's not too hard to find 3d models of the Transformers guys. Animating the armatures would take a while depending on how complex the actions you need in a given scene, but final render at TV resolution could be done at a rate of maybe 1 hour rendering time for 1 min of footage with pretty decent quality. If you wanted to match the quality of those early 00's Transformers CGI TV shows I'd say you could knock that down to half hour rendering time.

i've been playing bass for a local hip hop group..and we had practice last night...anyway on one song there's a guest rapper who came to practice last night to rehearse that song and he'd seen a preview yesterday afternoon.

he came in and was like "man...transformers 2...it was...just...too much, man...too much"

he seemed sorta staggered by it.

lol that reminds me of the South Park episode with Lucas and Spielberg raping Indiana Jones

Speaking of that Ebert review:

The humans, including lots of U.S. troops, shoot at the Transformers a lot, although never in the history of science fiction has an alien been harmed by gunfire.

http://21stcenturywaves.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2009/03/klaatu.jpg

"If you wanted to match the quality of those early 00's Transformers CGI TV shows I'd say you could knock that down to half hour rendering time."
hm... you sound like a man who speaks from experience...

is this will oldham?

http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3304/3573109099_1c7bff17e4_o.jpg

I know from looking through the Google Sketchup (another free rendering program) galleries that there are a bunch of Transformers models in there. Though I don't know why I'm encouraging this.

http://io9.com/5301898/michael-bay-finally-made-an-art-movie

Transformers: ROTF is so long, you'll need to wear adult diapers to it. But the movie's pure celebration of the primal urge, and unfiltered living, will make you rejoice in your adult diapers. You'll relieve yourself in your seat with a savage joy, your barbaric yawp blending in with the crowd's screams of excitement.

And from the same site...

We had to ask about the movies' signature moments of freakiness, like robots peeing on people or — in the new movie — a set of giant testicles hanging down from Devastator, the massive robot made out of five construction vehicles. (He's a bunch of construction vehicles, and there are two wrecking balls hanging between his legs.) Do Orci and Kurtzman write these things into the script, or does director Michael Bay "ad lib" them?

Generally, the duo said, these things are in the scripts. Although they couldn't remember the origins of Devastator's testicles. Orci thought that Bay had demanded "a big pair of testicles." But Kurtzman reminded him that it was actually co-writer Ehren Krueger's idea, when the three of them were holed up for a few months writing the script after the writers' strike. "The testicles are in the script," Kurtzman said. "Well, it's a construction machine, so you of course have wrecking balls. And Michael, immediately, of course, loved it."

more ebert: "At last we see what a four-hour erection looks like."

Went to see The Hangover last night, and if my local theater is any indication - this thing is going to break records. It was showing on 8(!) of the 16 screens, all showings last night were sold out.

just occurred to me - when has there ever been a superior sequel only two years after the first film?

That "Bay made an art-movie" review is fucken priceless

The first one was considered a train wreck by everyone, right ? (sorry haven't read the whole thread)
because somehow, I kinda enjoyed it. It was pretty fun.
Is this one as bad as the first one in that case ?

I liked the first one until the last half hour/45 mins where it was just blurry CGI robot battles where you couldn't tell what was going on. I've got a feeling those parts make up a large chunk of this one. And at 2 1/2 hours that's alot of blurry stuff to watch. Plus the Amos 'n' Andy robots don't sound too tasteful.

The "Transformers" sequel also came in with the second-biggest single-day revenues, behind only "The Dark Knight," with $67.2 million.

Student workers here who saw the film last night were talking shit about it.

These guys liked it:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zk8skIwptzQ

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HLFxSVPeJJM

this movie is MESSED UP

Thrusting metal phalluses, tentacles, and vagina dentatas galore (not to mention A GIANT SET OF ROBO-TESTICLES), dog-on-dog and robot-on-human humping, robot torture, blatantly racist robot caricatures, AND John Turturro's ass.

fuck this movie to hell forever!

god yes.

this movie is like the evil soulmate of Little Man

just with explosions

such a disturbing, soul-raping movie.

might see it this weekend -_-

Some of these negative reviews are making me interested in a way that positive reviews could never.

it's not really "ha-ha" bad, it's "holy shit we are doomed as a culture bad"

also it's like 2 1/2 hours too long

I think I'd like to take acid before watching it, maybe.

that would be unwise

yeah after reading how awful it is i am actually much more inclined to go check it out on the big screen cuz srsly if i watcht it on netflix (which, let's be honest, i will) i won't get that visceral thrill. also: smoke mad chron.

http://www.jerkcity.com/jerkcity3849.gif

oops wrong thread???

Michael Jackson thread?

LOL

no just the lols thread ;_;

is it weird that i find sam's mom to be kind of attractive?

I didn't give Speed Racer the chance it deserved in the theaters, and it didn't rate nearly as much venom from the professional moviewatchers as this thing is catching. So despite my retarded love for Bad Boys II and The Island, I am resolutely refusing to see this particular epic of trash.

did we already link to Ebert's Round 2? http://blogs.suntimes.com/ebert/2009/06/the_fall_of_the_revengers.html

is it weird that i find sam's mom to be kind of attractive?

I haven't seen it, obv, but if this movie is as much like working a 14-hour shift in the Hades Dennys with a gang of syphilitic mudmen like the reviews suggest, any redhead who seems half-human has got to be your best option

good point!

Some of these negative reviews are making me interested in a way that positive reviews could never.

― Your heartbeat soun like sasquatch feet (polyphonic), Thursday, June 25, 2009 10:36 PM (40 minutes ago) Bookmark

loved this. it's like a big ice cream sundae that sticks to your face afterwards.

don't get the hate at all

Maybe you had more BabyWipes than other people.

The reviews are only making me interested in that "I can't wait until this is on-demand and I have the option of getting progressively more intoxicated as I watch it" sense. there's no way I'm ever going to a theater for this kind of crap again, you can get as sheeted as you want beforehand but then you're locked in for two hours, sobering up in your uncomfortable chair while the eternal dumbness of somebody else's universe of absolute dumb envelopes your mind. No thanks, I lived through the last eight years for free.

my main problem with the first movie was that the transformer who got the most screen time was the most inconsequential, the little tape player bastard, while the gods in this pantheon had hardly any lines at all and the villains were fucking cardboard cut-outs. nevermind that nobody on earth could even draw you a picture of megatron from the first film, he was a big silver blur who hated things, two legs, two arms, one head, turns into some kind of airplane, hey! he's evil, what more do you need to know? And then there's this truck who cares and he also beats up other trucks. Magic. Bad guy dead. The end.

I went on wikipedia and looked up all the new robots from this one just to see the pictures and how they died. I can imagine the conversations and the product placement because we have cable and I've seen plenty of popcorn junk before. If anybody can tell me I'm missing something that I can't get from watching a screensaver and listening to meat beat manifesto records, please do.

This video clip from it, which is only 90 seconds long, I assume to be indicative of the movie as a whole.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ETkBjYPKOS8

I can't imagine WANTING to watch 2.5 hours of that shit.

^ LOOOOOOOOOOOOOL

f anybody can tell me I'm missing something that I can't get from watching a screensaver and listening to meat beat manifesto records, please do.

In fairness, this is more like a "life mantra" than it is a "rationale for not watching 'Transformers 2'".

The reviews are only making me interested in that "I can't wait until this is on-demand and I have the option of getting progressively more intoxicated as I watch it" sense. there's no way I'm ever going to a theater for this kind of crap again, you can get as sheeted as you want beforehand but then you're locked in for two hours, sobering up in your uncomfortable chair while the eternal dumbness of somebody else's universe of absolute dumb envelopes your mind. No thanks, I lived through the last eight years for free.

― El Tomboto, Thursday, June 25, 2009 11:31 PM (8 hours ago) Bookmark

missed u, dude

haven't seen it yet but the negative reactions are totally predictable and i don't think anyone really expected this to better the sequel (as i said upthread, when has a sequel so soon after the first film ever done this?).

"Spiderman"/"Spiderman 2"

i didn't think it was better, just as good, but fair enough

Saw it tonight. Not much you can say about giant robots fighting for two and a half hours. But WHAT is with Meat Is Murder poster on the kid's bedroom wall?

totally didn't plan on seeing this until i saw the reaction here. seems very, very key to be drunk throughout.

Just what is it about Michael Bay's gifts that they seem to come to fullest flower on sequels

also "Superman" (1978)/"Superman II"(1980)

"Spiderman"/"Spiderman 2"

True, but the indefensible, steaming pile of shit that was Spiderman 3 kind of made up for this, no?

christ add one little fosse number to a superhero movie and bitch bitch bitch

i think the crazy batshit WTF hilarious badness thing that some of you seem to be allured by worked for me to a certain extent in the first movie, which just cracked me up, it was such a stupid ridiculous ride. and i went into this one expecting more of that but halfway through i was like "i don't like this anymore... i want to go home"

it's a loooooooong movie

i'm still in the theater

so long

farewell

haa

Bay: No, those are construction balls.

he is daring somebody to assassinate him

"Nick Cage wasn’t a big actor when I cast him, nor was Ben Affleck before I put him in “Armageddon.” Shia LaBeouf wasn’t a big movie star before he did “Transformers”—and then he exploded. Not to mention Will Smith and Martin Lawrence, from “Bad Boys.” Nobody in the world knew about Megan Fox until I found her and put her in “Transformers.” I like to think that I’ve had some luck in building actors’ careers with my films."

yeah i want to see this but no way am i sitting in cinema for over 2 hours ever again

Did you add testicles to the robots, too?

No, those are construction balls.

Uh-huh

nick cage in what? xp

Wow, I didn't know Michael Bay directed "Peggy Sue Got Married", "Raising Arizona", "Moonstruck" and "Leaving Las Vegas"!

an assertion like that does take some construction balls.
xposts

don't forget wild at heart

Michael Bay's Honeymoon In Vegas

michael bay's fresh prince of bel-air

Shia LaBeouf wasn’t a big movie star before he did “Transformers”—and then he exploded.

RIP Shia LeBeouf

xp: hahahaaa Michael Bay's "Martin"

i'm going to this with my g/f tonight and this thread has only encouraged me.
am going to get epically stoned beforehand and sneak in some beers. should be a good time.

actually it shouldn't

http://thisrecording.com/storage/MV5BMjA5ODMyMzMzOF5BMl5BanBnXkFtZTcwNTgyMDg1Mg._V1._SX600_SY400_.jpg?__SQUARESPACE_CACHEVERSION=1245911656224

am going to get epically stoned beforehand and sneak in some beers. should be a good time.

― The Cursed Return of the Dastardly Thermo Thinwall, Friday, June 26, 2009 11:34 AM

the newish theater near me has a bar in it and allows you to take the drinks in with you ^.^

i love cinemas where you can booze.

the bar will be in the g/f's purse tonight. can only image how expensive movie theater beer must be!

surprisingly close to normal prices at the bar, at least for guinness. not sure about mixed drinks

the bar will be in the g/f's purse tonight.

― The Cursed Return of the Dastardly Thermo Thinwall, Friday, June 26, 2009 11:49 AM (5 minutes ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

is this like "the popcorn trick"

i most certainly hope not!

is that a bottle of scotch in your purse or am i just happy to see you

The reviews are only making me interested in that "I can't wait until this is on-demand and I have the option of getting progressively more intoxicated as I watch it" sense. there's no way I'm ever going to a theater for this kind of crap again, you can get as sheeted as you want beforehand but then you're locked in for two hours, sobering up in your uncomfortable chair while the eternal dumbness of somebody else's universe of absolute dumb envelopes your mind. No thanks, I lived through the last eight years for free.

― El Tomboto, Thursday, June 25, 2009 11:31 PM (8 hours ago) Bookmark

Did this with the first Transformers. Started off great, then it quickly went downhill as I realized Jon Voight as the Secretary of Defense was scampering around with Shia LeBouf and it got boring very, very quickly. Once I was sober I was hating my decision.

gonna see this Sunday!

sorry dude... that sucks. hope you are ok :(

I plugged my ears through most of this mess.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5KTOyIFvM1U

(home theater fiend who is also a)colleague: gonna see it monday at -redacted- in IMAX
el tomboto: is that REAL IMAX
colleague: no

waiting on d4n's review before i invest $12 & 150 minutes in this.

rent megashark vs giant octopus instead

summer tentpole flicks have become amazingly critic proof. Everyone I've spoken to is well aware of the world's disdain for this film and they all plan to go watch it this weekend barring only an unexpected death in their immediate family.

SGL & Tomboto - there is a simple, time-honored solution to your dilemma: (A) Pint of liquor; (B)large soda from concessions (or smuggled liter bottle if yr on a budget; (C) Soda drink, liquor pour, mix; (D) Repeat as necessary.

You have missed the point completely and I admire you for it.

Um no. My point was getting/maintaining a healthy level of intoxication at the cinema. If yours & SGL's post(s) upthread were figurative or metaphorical or something, so be it, I'm still still talking about the joy of getting drunk at the movies & you can take from that what you like.

I will not be paying $10 to see this film, however, no matter what level of booze consumption could potentially be involved. Getting drunk at this would just make me that much angrier at Michael Bay.

What a shit sandwich. I have never walked out of a movie before today.

I can't believe someone greenlighted that fucking Amos and Android act.

Please note that I'm not some blockbuster-hate. I liked the first Transformers quite a bit, but this movie had so many problems I hardly would know where to begin if it weren't for the gold-toothed jivebots.

seriously those were the most wtf? like how did anyone think they were a good idea?

Have you seen the Bad Boys films? This is MB we're talking about here. I mean, I haven't seen ROTF(L?), but dude obv knows no boundaries when it comes to crass.

I will not be paying $10 to see this film, however, no matter what level of booze consumption could potentially be involved.

yes. you get the point, and I admire you for that even more.

my ironic viewing of shitty films only extends to surefire box office failures tbqf

my review ftr

http://www.montrealmirror.com/2009/062509/film3.html

I might go and see it again, at IMAX.

There's extra scenes.

Rottentomatoes average was at 37% when I last checked. Now it went down to 21%.

It's getting worse!

el tomboto: is that REAL IMAX
colleague: no

― El Tomboto, Saturday, 27 June 2009 04:47

lol its playing in REAL IMAX @ md sci center. only $12 (+ $2 online "service" charge)

lol @ me considering going

i wan 2 feel s1ocki's pain

Approx. 24 hrs before my viewing!

so excited you guys, this is going to be horrible

I can't wait for the nuclear strength swearing.

Atomic F-Bombs

this movie was amazing.

i had an ironic erection the entire 5 hours.

Iron erection, surely.

i wanna see it

the movie i mean lol

it's long and amazing

the erection i mean

it is a huge Package

8==================D

Boxofficemojo says this thing's already made $200B worldwide

M, not B

A guy on my Facebook liked it:

100 its the nuts you have to go imax at the southbank book your tickets now to not be dissapointed. optimus pride life size on screen extra bits just filmed for the imax its amazing.

http://www.pbs.org/wgbh/cultureshock/flashpoints/theater/images/clockwork_big.jpg

optimus pride life size its amazing

optimus pride. gay robot.

the jokey bits in this were OK i thought (esp. the Mom, and i think i liked Wheelie aka Pescitron), the general plot and mostly boring battle scenes seemed a far bigger problem. definitely too much going on and not enough of it interesting enough. as much an advert for the US military (and the wonderful work they do) as some new toys huh (obv the first one was too but it was ramped up to ridic levels here). better than Term:Salv if just for the lolz.

99 (mostly pointless) questions really but did they explain why/how Bumblebee lost his ability to talk again right? or why the (pretty annoying) Twins were a cute ice cream truck?

They were a cute ice cream truck because they were undercover in China, which I presume is full of cute ice cream trucks. Plus, it makes for an awesome toy. I got the transformer that turns into a bi-plane, it's not in the film.

There was some explanation that Ratchet being the lamer that he is, couldn't fix Bumblebee's voice.

you LIKED the comedy in this? xp

like, the escargot & mimes jokes when they're in france?

oh that scene was awful but Julie White did a great comic performance as in the first. the parents actually get the least cringeworthy dialogue ffs!

Plus, it makes for an awesome toy.

this is good enough for me really. it's too bad they didn't stay as the ice cream van for the Egypt scenes.

voice actor Reno Wilson on the controvery regarding Mudflap & Skids racist stereotyping:

It's not fair to assume the characters are black, he said.
"It could easily be a Transformer that uploaded Kevin Federline data," Wilson said.

fuck probably not seeing this after all

people now saying this might even break Dark Knights opening record. sort of depressing.

because of Kevin Federline? xp

people now saying this might even break Dark Knights opening record. sort of depressing.

it's all about market penetration right? there are more screens to show films on now, more screenings per day, better co-ordinated and calculated promotional assaults.

presumably these kinds of films are also the most-pirated and most copied go figure

it's all about market penetration right? there are more screens to show films on now, more screenings per day, better co-ordinated and calculated promotional assaults.

but this can't be different from when DK came out? though the pr seems to have been more aggressive on this for sure.

not according to Michael Bay (but he is insane yes)

i was baffled as to how Dark Knight set a record despite not being for kids

it's a batman movie, not a bergman flick. kids are going to go anyway.

also, heath ledger.

kids are going to go anyway

their parents took them? or there was a mass fake id parade?

yrs bluomas

Dark Knight was only PG-13, right? I took my 11-year-old cousin to see it at midnight, he walked around pop-eyed for the next few days.

i thought it was higher n/m

http://boxofficemojo.com/movies/?id=transformers2.htm

Follow along, children! $387M so far!

Compare & contrast with:

GRADE THIS MOVIE
Readers 	B  (1059 votes)
Your Grade 	Log in
GRADE BREAKDOWN
As:	 576	 54.4%
Bs:	 190	 17.9%
Cs:	 117	 11.0%
Ds:	 52	 4.9%
Fs:	 123	 11.6%

Julie White did a great comic performance as in the first

You must be on all kinds of drugs.

Sorry, that was rude, but seriously, the "comedy" of the parents in the first movie was teeth-grindingly painful.

I did like how they discover their son had a hot chick in his room and they were entirely supportive and proud.

not so much from the performance aspect but just because it was unexpected from a hollywood movie.

The transformers have way too many pieces going on and all the Decepticons look the same and everyone sounds the same (except for the jive talkin' ones). Would have been much better if they looked like this:

http://laist.com/attachments/la_josh2/transformerswins.jpg

Oh, and the most excruciating part was when the dad and shia were SCREAMING at each other during the battle. Jesus!

Also, is there any college dorm room in the country with a 'Bad Boys 2' poster? C'mon!

wasn't it Bad Boys 3? as a joke/advert?

Ah.

yeah Megatron up there looks like a wad of twigs and driftwood.

LOLz

http://uncyclopedia.wikia.com/wiki/Michael_Bay

http://www.toplessrobot.com/2009/06/bonus_robs_transformers_2_faqs.php?page=1

fail.

That Topless Robot Q&A is so much better than watching the movie could ever be.

Really?
Yeah, for a little while. But then the Transformers in heaven send him back because he still has work to do.

Fuck you.
I'm serious.

Fuck you. There's no way.
It's true.

I think this is the most I've ever enjoyed reading about a bad movie that I have no intention of ever seeing. All the hatchet jobs have been top-notch.

i didn't like that topless robot piece - kinda lazy/some of the questions and answers are equally dumb

like what dude

e.g.

So the Decepticons made a slutty robot to attend his college and enrolled her in classes and put her in on-campus housing just in case Sam ended up being important at some point in the future?

maybe i missed this but did we see the girl in any situation where it was clear she couldn't just have infiltrated the college/class/party on the same day that Sam did, undetected by the authorities? wasn't her goal not just to suck his brains out (literally) to get the symbols info or something?

it is a slight exaggeration for comedic effect

I saw this on Tuesday... Fuck me, that's a truly terrible film. It's breathtakingly stupid, almost completely incoherent, crass beyond belief and borderline offensive in places...

I would never have thought a film that consists primarily of explosions and giant robots fighting one another (two things that I would normally enjoy watching)could be so boring. It's like all the fun was sucked out of it. And WTF is it with the two "ghetto" robots that can't even fucking read their own fucking language, for fuck's sake? I know Bay loves his offensive stereotypes but that's really taking the fucking biscuit!

You don't go into a film like this with expectations of seeing high art; you would hope that the images thrown up onto the screen are, at the very least, visually arresting, but Bay has managed to make something that should look exciting and cool appear so bloody pedestrian that I could feel my soul shrivelling as I watched it.Which I think may be some sort of gift he has. The only scene with any kind of visual interest to it was the fight in the forest and even that had the habit of cutting to Shia fucking LeBoeuf cowering when it should have been concentrating on robotic violence.

I seem to have developed a personal and rather vicious animosity towards everyone involved in the making of this movie...

you'll still go and see the third one tho right?

oh - ROTF was indeed high art.
very high.

I seem to have developed a personal and rather vicious animosity towards everyone involved in the making of this movie...

I have that, and I haven't even seen it. I still like the short version of the TR review... "Watching Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen is marginally better than shitting your pants, but it takes a lot longer."

i don't think i've seen a michael bay film that didn't contain some backass jive-talking stereotypes of black people used as comic relief (cf. the taxi scene at the beginning of 'armageddon', a couple of the hostages in 'the rock')

@blueski Point about the TR piece's more pedantic questions is that suspension of disbelief has to be earned. A great movie can be as implausible as it likes. A bad one deserves to be picked apart piece by piece. Unless everyone's lying to me and TRF is secretly fantastic.

i thought most of the questions were fairly easily explained so it felt too easy and disingenuous and not funny. the stupidest things about the film are more fundamental e.g. the only reason they didn't destroy Megatron completely in the first film was so they could make a second one. in the first film it makes more sense why the Autobots are vehicles - now they're working with the military it's significantly more stupid that they can't just scan and transform into planes instead of being parachuted out of them.

I think this is the most I've ever enjoyed reading about a bad movie that I have no intention of ever seeing. All the hatchet jobs have been top-notch.

― Dorian (Dorianlynskey), Thursday, July 2, 2009 10:43 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

otm. the one stet linked to is probably one of the stronger things i've read about any film this year.

(there is no effing way im going to see this piece of shit.)

Dad wants to hang out this weekend and I usually dont see him and ill be moving all weekend so i'll want to sit down and chill the f out for 3 hours. He found a drive-in that is showing this and what can i say i am thinking about seeing it. Kinda wishing they did Rifftrax that you could bring on an ipod and play along with theater movies though...

I seem to have developed a personal and rather vicious animosity towards everyone involved in the making of this movie...

― Stone Monkey, Thursday, July 2, 2009 5:27 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

you'll still go and see the third one tho right?

― Hard House SugBanton (blueski), Thursday, July 2, 2009 5:36 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

hmm really makes u think

am i the only person who just watched a dodgy russian torrent with the final couple of minutes missing?

do you want me to tell you how it ended?

the robots win

Megatron is Sam's father.

all the vehicles are just robots in disguise

and then they lez up

I'll see the 3rd film!

So will I. Which possibly shows that I have a previously undiagnosed propensity for self harming...

rip robots in dis guyz

My verdict on this movie is "not nearly as boring as 'Terminator: Salvation'." It didn't actually make any sense whatsoever and was determinedly idiotic for most of its running time, but it had some reasonably thrilling sequences as along as I ignored Step and Fetchit.

I intend to never watch this movie again.

They're pretty difficult to ignore. I think the people sat next to me got a teensy bit annoyed by me muttering "Oh, for fuck's sake!" every time they showed up on screen...

"Oh, for fuck's sake!" should be any rational being's response to any given 30 seconds of this movie

I may actually buy the DVD of this to see what self-aggrandizing shit Bay can come up with on the Director's Commentary. He's absolutely fucking appalling in the one for the first movie.

ha ha, i can imagine.

rent, dude. rent.

They're pretty difficult to ignore.

This, unfortunately, is very true.

Basically I thought this movie was terrible but I didn't feel like demanding my money back, unlike "T:S".

Taking: Sides

http://www.shanghaidaily.com/sp/article/2009/200907/20090720/article_407995.htm

A 14-YEAR-OLD boy drank gasoline for five years to obtain "energy" - just as his idols "Bumble Bee" or "Optimus Prime" do in "Transformers," the Sichuan-based West China Metropolis Daily reported yesterday.

After the boy, in Yibin City, southwest Sichuan Province, had watched the animated TV series, he began to drink gasoline to become a "valiant fighter" like "Optimus Prime," his father told the newspaper.

"He began to drink gasoline five years ago, when we found he liked smelling lighter fuel," he said.

The boy's mother owned a grocery stall, selling small goods such as lighters.

In 2004, she often found lighters missing two or three days after she'd bought them. She later found that her son had been stealing them.

The parents talked to their son and asked him not to do it again. "But afterwards we found our motorcycle's gasoline was always disappearing, and one day when we found the boy had drunk a half bottle of gasoline stolen from the motorcycle, we were too shocked to say anything," the father said.

IQ dropped

They locked the motorcycle away after that but the boy began to steal gasoline from neighbors and was drinking more and more - two or three bottles at a time.

"Since my son started to drink gas, his IQ has dropped sharply and now he can't figure out simple addition and subtraction," the father said.

"Before that, he was a very smart boy, and he could even repair the television. But now he does not know the answer of 7 plus 17."

The worried parents finally took their son to hospital where they were told the boy had a mental disorder and a strong "gasoline dependence."

"The gasoline contains a lot of lead, which can do harm to people's brains. To make thing even worse, the boy is in the physical development stage, and the lead has caused serious damage to his body," Peng Houquan, a doctor from a hospital in Yibin, said.

"Transformers" is now a Hollywood blockbuster movie franchise and the second live-action film is currently breaking box office records in China.

"Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen" has gained 400 million yuan (US$58.4 million) in the country, breaking the record set by "Titanic" 10 years ago.

Does Optimus Prime actually drink gasoline? Like, from a cup?

Are there scenes of Optimus and Bumblebee just standing around a gas tank like its a watercooler? I thought these dudes lived off energy cubes or something.

you're right - that kid made a terrible mistake!

lol @ the last two lines

you're right - that kid made a terrible mistake!

um, zing? I just asked if the press right to suggest this happens on the show or if they're just taking the West China Metropolis Daily on faith.

i wasnt zinging u i was just joshin

"He began to drink gasoline five years ago, when we found he liked smelling lighter fuel," he said.

gasoline thirst predates Bay. This is one crime he is not guilty of. I say we punish him anyway.

14-year-old pees on John Turturro

maybe he was watching drunken master ii

14 year old boy humps Megan Fox's leg while referring to her as "warrior goddess"

oh wait that was Michael Bay

I really cannot fucking believe that scene survived editing. No wonder Megan Fox has been blasting the shit out of Michael Bay.

for some reason i thought it was quite funny the way Sam was all like "are you aware of what's happening right now?"

No wonder Megan Fox has been blasting the shit out of Michael Bay.

Hey, she's the witless media whore who agreed to be in his worthless movie.

^^^ charming!

i wish media whores would stop agreeing to be in movies

Or directing them.

http://movies.yahoo.com/feature/access-hollywood-megan-fox-michael-bay.html

Megan Fox: Michael Bay's Like 'Napoleon' & 'Wants To Be Like Hitler'
by Access Hollywood    September 2, 2009

Megan Fox on the cover of WONDERLAND Magazine's Sept/Oct 2009 issue Mariano Vivanco/WONDERLAND Magazine LOS ANGELES, Calif. -- Megan Fox starred in the biggest movie of the summer, the Michael Bay-directed "Transformers: Revenge of The Fallen," but according to the actress, the director almost killed her and co-star Shia LaBeouf with his "Napoleon" and "Hitler" tendencies.

The box office bombshell unleashed on Bay in an interview with Britain's Wonderland magazine in its September/October issue.

And Megan's comparisons don't stop with just the 19th century dictator.

"He wants to be like Hitler on his sets, and he is. So he's a nightmare to work for but when you get him away from set, and he's not in director mode, I kind of really enjoy his personality because he's so awkward, so hopelessly awkward," Megan continued. "He has no social skills at all. And it's endearing to watch him. He's vulnerable and fragile in real life and then on set he's a tyrant."

And according to Megan, Bay pushes his actors to the almost breaking point while filming.

"Shia and I almost die when we make a 'Transformers' movie," she told the mag. "He has you do some really insane things that insurance would never let you do."

However, Megan isn't the first Hollywood star to bite the hand that helped make them into a household name.

During an appearance on the "Late Show with David Letterman" in July, Katherine Heigl noted her return to the "Grey's Anatomy" set was greeted by some long days.

"Our first day back was Wednesday [of last week], and I keep saying this because I hope it embarrasses them - [it was] a 17-hour day," she told Dave on July 20. "I think it's cruel and mean."

And while Heigl may have said the comment in jest, ABC entertainment president Stephen McPherson didn't find her remarks too funny. He fired back at the ABC TCA presentation in August, saying "I think it's unfortunate. People are going to behave in the way they choose to behave. There are so many people who work so hard on 'Grey's,' and all of our shows, without any notoriety and those are the ones I'd be concerned about, people who feel like they're being criticized or looked down upon."

On Wednesday, it was announced that Heigl would take a five-episode hiatus from "Grey's" to shoot the romantic comedy "Life As We Know It."

Also in July, "Twilight's" Rachelle Lefevre was replaced in the vampire series' third movie, "Eclipse," due to a scheduling conflict. She told Access in a statement that she was "stunned" by the studio's decision and "never did I fathom I would lose the role over a 10 day overlap. I was happy with my contract with Summit and was fully prepared to continue to honor it. Summit chose simply to recast the part."

Summit responded to Rachelle's statement saying, "We feel that her choice to withhold her scheduling conflict information from us can be viewed as a lack of cooperative spirit which affected the entire production."

My husband was talking to someone who did stand in work on this movie, and Bay threatened to murder him several times during the shoot. But I guess he did that to everybody so nobody really took him seriously.

He made the CGI bots run on time

Sounds like Bay and Christian Bale need to work together, in the presence of an extremely well-concealed Webcam.

hahahaha YES

It's true Hitler threatened all his actors too.

Oh so that's the next 'Hitler has a fit' subtitling meme, then.

I heard Michael Bay was giving everyone on the set free health care too.

I'm surprised she'd even heard of Hitler, let alone Napoleon.

Does an anecdote exist that makes Michael Bay seem like a decent human being? His mother probably had one once.

Crew Letter Originally Posted on MichaelBay.com:

"This is an open letter to all Michael Bay fans. We are three crew members that have worked with Michael for the past ten years. Last week we read the terrible article with inflammatory, truly trashing quotes by the Ms. Fox about Michael Bay. This letter is to set a few things straight.

Yes, Megan has great eyes, a tight stomach we spray with glycerin, and an awful silly Marilyn Monroe tattoo plastered on her arm that we cover up to keep the moms happy.

Michael found this shy, inexperienced girl, plucked her out of total obscurity thus giving her the biggest shot of any young actresses' life. He told everyone around to just trust him on his choice. He granted her the starring role in Transformers, a franchise that forever changed her life; she became one of the most googled and oogled women on earth. She was famous! She was the next Angelina Jolie, hooray! Wait a minute, two of us worked with Angelina - second thought - she's no Angelina. You see, Angelia is a professional.

We know this quite intimately because we've had the tedious experience of working with the dumb-as-a-rock Megan Fox on both Transformers movies. We've spent a total of 12 months on set making these two movies.

We are in different departments; we can't give our names because sadly doing so in Hollywood could lead to being banished from future Paramount work. One of us touches Megan's panties, the other has the often shitty job of pulling Ms. Sour pants out of her trailer, while another is near the Panaflex camera that helps to memorialize the valley girl on film.

Megan has the press fooled. When we read those magazines we wish we worked with that woman. Megan knows how to work her smile for the press. Those writers should try being on set for two movies, sadly she never smiles. The cast, crew and director make Transformers a really fun and energetic set. We've traveled around the world together, so we have never understood why Megan was always such - the grump of the set?

When facing the press, Megan is the queen of talking trailer trash and posing like a porn star. And yes we've had the unbearable time of watching her try to act on set, and yes, it's very cringe-able. So maybe, being a porn star in the future might be a good career option. But make-up beware, she has a paragraph tattooed to her backside (probably due her rotten childhood) easily another 45 minutes in the chair!

So when the three of us caught wind of Ms Fox, pontificating yet again in some publication (like she actually has something interesting to say) blabbing her trash mouth about a director whom we three have grown to really like. She compared working with Michael, to "working with Hitler". We actually don't think she knows who Hitler is by the way. But we wondered how she doesn't realize what a disgusting, fully uneducated comment this was? Well, here let's get some facts straight.

Say what you want about Michael - yes at times he can be hard, but he's also fun, and he challenges everyone for a reason - he simply wants people to bring their 'A' game. He comes very prepared, knows exactly what he wants, involves the crew and expects everyone to follow through with his or her best, and that includes the actors. He's one of the hardest working directors out there.

He gets the best from his crews, many of whom have worked with him for 15 years. And yes, he's loyal, one of the few directors we've encountered who lowered his fee by millions to keep Transformers in the United States and California, so he could work with his own crew.

Megan says that Transformers was an unsafe set? Come on Megan, we know it is a bit more strenuous then the playground at the trailer park, but you don't insult one of the very best stunt and physical effects teams in the business! Not one person got hurt!

And who is the real Megan Fox? She is very different than the academy nominee and winning actors we've all worked around. She's as about ungracious a person as you can ever fathom. She shows little interest in the crew members around her. We work to make her look good in every way, but she's absolutely never appreciative of anyone's hard work. Never a thank you. All the crewmembers have stopped saying hi to Ms. Princess because she never says hello back. It gets tiring. Many think she just really hates the process of being an actress.

Megan has been late to the sets many times. She goes through the motions that make her exude this sense of misery. We've heard the A.D's piped over the radio that Megan won't walk from her trailer until John Turturro walks first! John's done seventy-five movies and she's made two!

Never expect Megan to attend any of the 15 or so crew parties like all the other actors have. And then there's the classless night she blew off The Royal Prince of Jordan who made a special dinner for all the actors. She doesn't know that one of the grips daughters wanted to visit their daddy's work to meet Megan, but he wouldn't let them come because he told them "she is not nice."

The press certainly doesn't know her most famous line. On our first day in Egypt, the Egyptian government wouldn't let us shoot because of a permit problem as the actors got ready in make up at the Four Seasons Hotel. Michael tried to make the best of it; he wanted to take the cast and crew on a private tour of the famous Giza pyramids. God hold us witness, Megan said, "I can't believe Michael is [frick]ing forcing us to go to the [frick]ing pyramids!" I guess this is the "Hitler guy" she is referring to.

So this is the Megan Fox you don't get to see. Maybe she will learn, but we figure if she can sling insults, then she can take them too. Megan really is a thankless, classless, graceless, and shall we say unfriendly bitch. It's sad how fame can twist people, and even sadder that young girls look up to her. If only they knew who they're really looking up to.

But 'Fame' is fleeting. We, being behind the scenes, seen em' come and go. Hopefully Michael will have Megatron squish her character in the first ten minutes of Transformers 3. We can tell you that will make the crew happy!"

-Loyal Transformers Crew

an awful silly Marilyn Monroe tattoo plastered on her arm that we cover up to keep the moms happy.

These days most moms probably have something worse.

Hey Ned, do you have the power to delete the accidental post I made w/ this in the fifteen songs thread on ILM? I acc. posted it in that thread.

JEEZ. :-D Yeah hold on.

Danke!

Was lent this. Tried to watch it. Made it through 17 minutes, with all the Sam's family/girlfriend interations on 2x speed. Couldn't watch any more. Stupid, witless, unfunny, ineptly filmed and incredibly fuckwitted. And that's just Megan Fox [bada-dum!].

http://www.rifftrax.com/files/imagecache/product/files/Transformers2Web_0.jpg
http://www.rifftrax.com/rifftrax/transformers-revenge-fallen

As with the first one, I'm going to wait until the RiffTrax version

― Carroll Shelby Downard (Elvis Telecom), Tuesday, June 23, 2009 8:33 AM (5 months ago)

Glad I waited! Still this movie is so fucking long that it's just exhausting to watch and concentrate on the riffs.

STILL:

"Is there anything lower than playing a mime in a Michael Bay movie?"

"Megadeth, report to Hanger 18."

Turturo: "I am directly beneath the enemy scrotum."
Bill: "Okay, somebody won a bet there. 'Dude, put the line I'm directly beneath the enemy scrotum into this movie. If it still makes money, I'll pay for a weekend in Vegas.

Enjoyed this.

"BLERRUGGGHHAAAA!!! Tastes like lousy screenwriting!"

not enough transforming for me

should probably start a new thread, but can't be bothered.

Shia says Transformers 3 brings the heart back to the franchise

finally, they're getting back to what everybody wants from the franchise: the relationships

heart = matrix of leadership?? oh no they used that shitly in the second one or the first one or both the first one and the second one

http://i41.tinypic.com/r7n7e1.jpg

Plus no Megan.

RIP the heart of the franchise

LOL

http://www.radaronline.com/exclusives/2010/05/video-heidi-montags-audition-tape-replace-megan-fox-transformers-3

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/article-1319918/Transformers-3-hit-second-accident-Stunt-car-slams-real-Police-SUV-unscripted-crash.html?ITO=1490

Glad nobody was seriously hurt, and the cop deserves a medal for shutting down this film for a day...

Movie extra Gabriela Cedillo suffered brain damage and partial paralysis last month when she was hit in the head by a flying metal cable.

fucking hell

man f8ck this

kinda amazing how the hood of the bumblebee disappears

This message is specifically to Pedantic Hamsick. Yeah, I agree that Transformers II was a wash; with changes to core characters and the additions of questionable characters. But there's one constant fact, The Transformers Movies are ONLY about the the real stars, the Autobots and Decepticons, not about some loser humans which are placed into the movies for fillers. To tell you the truth, I don't know why Megan Fox is such a marque' in this production, REAL Transformers followers know that PETER CULLEN is the ORIGINAL VOICE of OPTIMUS PRIME; who just happens to be the real star of The Transformers... In case you can't follow what I'm saying; Optimus Prime is that big blue and red customized tractor trailer that was kicking ass all over the place. As a matter of fact, I'm glad that Megan Fox is out of the production; the real stars are Optimus Prime, Megatron, Bumble Bee, Devastator, etc. but, if you really knew anything about The Transformers, you would know this already...

- Robert L.M. Smith III, Heidleberg, Germany, 14/10/2010 03:14

This message is specifically to Pedantic Hamsick. Yeah, I agree that Transformers II was a wash; with changes to core characters and the additions of questionable characters. But there's one constant fact, The Transformers Movies are ONLY about the the real stars, the Autobots and Decepticons, not about some loser humans which are placed into the movies for fillers. To tell you the truth, I don't know why Megan Fox is such a marque' in this production, REAL Transformers followers know that PETER CULLEN is the ORIGINAL VOICE of OPTIMUS PRIME; who just happens to be the real star of The Transformers... In case you can't follow what I'm saying; Optimus Prime is that big blue and red customized tractor trailer that was kicking ass all over the place. As a matter of fact, I'm glad that Megan Fox is out of the production; the real stars are Optimus Prime, Megatron, Bumble Bee, Devastator, etc. but, if you really knew anything about The Transformers, you would know this already...

http://musiccourt.files.wordpress.com/2010/08/robert_smith.jpg

- Robert L.M. Smith III, Heidleberg, Germany, 14/10/2010 03:14

Disintegration (Upon Impact)

cover my face while the autobot dies!
in the revenge of the fallen
in the revenge of the fallen

maybe they'll let him handle the musical if Spider-Man: Turn Off The Dark is a hit

s1ocki, the producers were absolved of wrongdoing in the accident that partially paralyzed that particular extra. Her family is furious -- can't really blame them.

This particular accident tho was the police department's fault from what I've read. I'd always wondered what would happen if someone accidentally drove onto a closed set, and well, now I know! lol

the Indiana OSHA chose not to fine or cite the production, which is not the same as being absolved of liability for the civil suit, afaict

yea that is still ongoing, they're mad because they feel the producers were at fault

there's seriously no liability if you get paralyzed when a piece of metal flies into your head during a stunt shot??

I feel vaguely confident in asserting that "Dark of the Moon" will be marginally better than "Revenge of the Fallen".

for a start, it's in 3D, so a week or so of eyelid flutter will be a guarantee.

i did not feel great when the skyscraper split in half in the trailer

I feel vaguely confident in asserting that "Dark of the Moon" will be marginally better than "Revenge of the Fallen".

there is no way it could be worse

there's no way it could be WO- oh heh

I'm looking forward to reviews that top Ebert's description of the last one as sounding (I think) akin to running pots and pans through the dryer.

If you want to save yourself the ticket price, go into the kitchen, cue up a male choir singing the music of hell, and get a kid to start banging pots and pans together. Then close your eyes and use your imagination.

I was close enough.

The Chicago Tribune one is the review that described the movie as "like listening to rocks in a clothes dryer for 2½ hours."