the rolling sunny successor encourages her distrust of the human race by obsessively reading true*****confessions.com and posts her favorite haters

12.23.08 10:49a
My wife had our son a few weeks ago....I wish she would heal "down there" so that we can have sex!!!

12.22.08 7:25p
yeah, she's smoking pot again. time to take the kid and head on out to dad's

I sort of feel like the thread should have been locked on the initial post, wau.

12/22/08 4:07 PM | category: Doing It

I had successful anal sex the other night, and it was great!

The only problem is that I am having awful gas. Has that happened to anyone else?

12/22/08 3:56 PM | category: Friends With Benefits

I act oblivious, but the truth is that I know you're in love with me.

...I just don't care.

12.23.08 6:01p
Somebody took a massive shit in the ladies room right before we all hit the road to go home. Nice big one, left it all sitting in the toilet, unflushed. Fucking weirdo, poop fetish. I work in Public Relations.

THIS IS WHAT PEOPLE ARE REALLY THJINKING

12.23.08 4:35p
I am going to beat up my co-worker today. I'll wait for her at the Parking lot.

12/22/08 3:56 PM | category: Friends With Benefits

I act oblivious, but the truth is that I know you're in love with me.

...I just don't care.

― ghost kittens! so cute! (sunny successor), Wednesday, December 24, 2008 5:15 AM (1 minute ago) Bookmark

damn

12.23.08 2:41p
Are you serious an effin diamond engagement ring? They are so tacky and out dated. I really dont care if you spent 10 grand on it !diamonds are so ugly.. Waiting a year and a half for this and he gets a diamond WTF????

WTF, PEOPLE??? A FUCKING DIAMOND FOR A FUCKING ENGAGEMENT RING??? IS HE HIGH????

12.21.08 7:32p
Looks like its a battle of the wills, who will be the first to call this off and walk away.

12.19.08 12:37p
I put my wedding dress on, I said it was to make sure it still fit. However, once I put it on I pranced around my house as if I was a 6 year old!

CUET ^^

11.30.08 10:48p
I was never a fiance or girlfriend but I did become the bride lol.

intriguing

that sounds like a kate hudson movie

10.24.08 1:05p
My wife had an emergency C-section too. Bye bye sex, and everything else! Sucked. But this time we adopted, and actually have had *more* sex since getting the newborn. Woohoo!

Birthmother expenses: $5000 Travel: $1500 Agency & legal fees: $20,000 A perfectly intact wife: priceless

For sexless marriages, there's pregnancy. For everything else, there's adoption.

PRICELESS

this winter kate hudson is the bride lol

(from truedadconfessions)

10.23.08 11:20a
I'm Gay

greenconfessions is the most boring shit ever fyi

10.22.08 2:34p
Yeah, wife, you can't put a car seat on a motorcycle.

That's the point.

WAHT???

ive never read green confessions. is it all like "i had a 7 minute shower instead of a 5 minute shower and i dont regret it!!!!!" ?

12.19.08 5:59a
My two kids and husband go thru 3 gallons of whole milk a week.


12.18.08 1:43p
My husband is amazing, but sometimes he forgets to recycle things. I dig through the garbage for the recyclable items, and put them in the correct bag.


12.18.08 10:55a
I am green and getting greener by the minute (now I reuse my plastic sandwich bags), but I love a clean-shaven short-haired man. No hippies for me, thank you.

10.21.08 2:22p
I think Chris Crocker is hot, but I'm not gay.

!!!!!

ARE YOU SURE

someone should start trueilxconfessions thread y/n?

i guess theres already herb confessions 77 thred

ay if ILTMI brought back anonymous posting i think an ilx confessions thread might flourish

or maybe it would be me posting emo shit with 47 usernames

i think we'd figure out who "MAD TROO" was pretty quick

xD

10.20.08 1:26p
I wish I'd quit getting spammed with all the viagra/cialis emails. All it does is remind me that my wife hates sex and I'll never have a need for either product.

ohman

dudes like that need to ask if their wives hate sex or hate them

people need to have more premarital sex.

those sites make me never want to get married and never have kids

^^ smart people everywhere making this decision is what leads to things like a 2nd gwb term.

I wanna read this website but I can't figure out what ***** might be.

can i get a 77 invite?

fill ***** with any of the following:

dad
mom
bride
hookup
militarywives(i think?)

Don't forget:
green

i can sum it up for you. all the dad ones are 'my wife wont fuck me i hate that fat bitch how dare she trap me into marriage and children i hate and my girlfriend rocks'

the mom ones are 'oh my god i didnt take timmy to the park today im such a bad mom'

all the military ones are 'i wish my dude would come home'

all the hookup ones are 'god why do want to ruin it by getting involved, retard?'

oh yeah greeen

Green goes 'if global warming exists why's it do damn cold lol' or 'I love my SUV!'

awww truedadconfessions got shut down

truedatconfessions.com

the servers couldnt handle the truth

what is unsuccessful anal sex?

most people call that regular sex

grouphug.us

Hug Live. It's a real-time confession site that doesn't require manual refreshing, and also has threaded comments build right in. Check it out. Unlike this site, it will not retain confessions forever, but it will retain them for quite a while. As always, remember that comments can be hurtful.
more
88253493

i feel so stupid. it was more than a month ago since we split but youre still on my mind. i fall for people too hard, too fast. you ended it like i meant nothing to you. then you say “i just didnt feel much for you”, those words hurt bad. especially after everything you used to say to me. i feel so stupid for believeing anything you said. and now youve made me lose complete faith in finding any boy i’ll be able to completely trust. thanks bastard.

* Suggest removal

742107715

I also wonder if he knows, that while I am lying next to my husband, I think about him to put myself to sleep.

* Suggest removal

554553649

I still think about her all the time. But it’s because when it comes to relationships, I am like a lost puppy that gets ecstatic from the slightest bit of affection. I get crushes on people I let close way too easily and way too deeply.

To her, a few minutes holding hands in the dark was nothing… to me, it meant everything in the world. And I miss her so much.

I will never get out of the lost puppy stage if people keep kicking my happy puppy face to break my happy puppy love. But I don’t blame them one bit.

124009242

my best friend FUCKS ME OFF so much.
but i have to be nice to her, because she has anorexia.

oh friendship

whoa more got picked up in my c+p than i thought, sry

I will never get out of the lost puppy stage if people keep kicking my happy puppy face to break my happy puppy love. But I don’t blame them one bit.

that's too long for a screenname, boo

what did you just call me

you heard me

some posts from gh:

I think rape is too strong a word.
I think they should call it..
"surprise sex".
good times.

At my wife's wake, I snuck off to the men's room to 'grieve' By grieving, I mean have sex with my late wife's sister.

I love redheads.
even if a girl is very ugly - or an older woman - I don't care, if they have red hair, i almost fall in love with them.
not gingery ... just red ... it's amazing
all i do is look at redhead porn (even thought most of it is crap) and fantasise about redhead women.
especially really skinny, pale redheads.
i've got a semi right now after just writing that.
wow.
if i ever get into a really serious relatioship with someone who isn't redhaired, i'll have to dye it for them in their sleep.

I wish I was Steve-O. He seems worry free. He could very well be enlightened

I'm secretely in love with an internet acquaintance named Squall. I lie awake at nights touching myself as I think about him, but I realize our love can never be because he is dating an asian he bought in the Philippines.
Should I tell him he is my estranged son?

I HATE sociology majors. I can only be friends with biology students. I often rip into sociology people and once made a girl cry. I know I'm not alone

I spelled "porno" prono in my last confession by mistake. That pisses me off, makes me feel stupid, and make me feel I contributed to the overall dumbing down of society. Sorry.

I'm secretely in love with an internet acquaintance named Squall. I lie awake at nights touching myself as I think about him, but I realize our love can never be because he is dating an asian he bought in the Philippines.
Should I tell him he is my estranged son?

o_O

more:

i tried to fuck my maid, but she refused. i'm such a loser.

im 35 and i tell my friends im 14

It should be illegal for beautiful women to walk down the streets in broad daylight. It's so unfair.

One of these days I'd like to stop waking up without any underwear on. I wish I knew what happens to it while I'm asleep.

I dosed a few of my friends with acid, without telling them. They still think it was just really good pot we had smoked, but in actuality, I had slipped acid into the beer we were drinking. When I started tripping, I started to feel really bad, because I knew if some of them found out, they'd be really really pissed off at me, but now I just don't care. People are too afraid of the supposedly "heavy drugs," and need to get over that fear.

Roses are red
Violets are blue
I'll kill Jody and make hats with her skin

I masturbate over pictures of myself, cuz i turn myself on.

People always ask if I've ever broken a bone. The truth is, yes. I've broken my dad's finger.

maybe my favorite gh confession of all time, can't be beat for wtf-ness:

hi, this is the hunky girl again. i meant to say i ate it.

I'm secretely in love with an internet acquaintance named Squall. I lie awake at nights touching myself as I think about him, but I realize our love can never be because he is dating an asian he bought in the Philippines.
Should I tell him he is my estranged son?

o_O

― I have a set of penises leftover from some bach party somewhere (HI DERE), Tuesday, August 25, 2009 1:20 PM (11 minutes ago) Bookmark

OK WAHT???

is that name a video game ref

Mine?

Oh! Squall?

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Squall_Leonhart

icing on the cake!

gotta be fake tho, come on

Yeah, I realized what you meant. Hmmmm I prefer to think there's just guy out there, you know, named Squall.

what a disaster for filipinas

890104075

I think Im bisexual too but havent been with another woman. I just made myself come 11 times in less than an hour. Is that normal? I want a man right now.

uh

uh

9 more to go!

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Permanent_Sexual_Arousal_Syndrome

Those "See Also" links are a wonderland of sexual dysfunction:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vaginismus

I'm predicting this thread will lead to many wonderful new log in names

I assume there is a link on there to something about vulvodynia too, right?

Those "See Also" links are a wonderland of sexual dysfunction

John Mayer clearly titled the song incorrectly.

Why would something as awful as vulvodynia have such an awesome-sounding name?

Very metal.

767856353

I split the price of a dildo with my ex best friend and we traded it off every week.
That’s how close we were.

shades of "Requiem For A Dream" there

That’s how close we were.

gee, I wonder how something could have gone wrong in that adorable relationship

Probably it snapped in use.

802451868

My ex girlfriend is really ugly (in my opinion) so i wonder why we went out, we didnt have a lot in common.

^^^^WATCH OUT LADIES, HERE COMES MR. CHARM^^^^

reminds me of this one:

every so often, at a certain angle in a certain light, I think my reasonably pretty girlfriend looks like a monkey.

also:

I am a shallow male.
But i hate stupid people.
So i need someone really hot and really clever, but not as clever as I am. This is hard to find.

Not quite a Zen koan.

i like ugly girls they're generally easier to get into bed. I know i could do better but i suppose beauty is only a light switch away

is this you or gh?

gh! gh!

so no monkey gf? :(

no :(

479585268

I’d rather date your mom. She has better hair and she’s way funner to hang out with.

why is truedadconfessions.com gone? That is SO unfair!

enough about my sexual preferences, back to gh. sticking to the encouraging a dim view of humanity theme:

i'm sorry in advance for cheating on you again.

If I ever go into a store (especially a dept. store) I get this INCREDIBLE urge to flail my arms everywhere and knock down all the glass and dishes. It would seriously be like a dream come true. When I go into any store with glass displays I have to hold my hands together or put them in my pockets.

My penis is so large that I sometimes dress it up as a little kid and try to make people think it's my son.

I once dislocated my back by trying to suck my own dick. I told everyone that I fell down the stairs.

my friend just applied for a job as an animal genital inspector in london zoo, i envy him as i like cocks

I'm a horrible person. A while ago, when I was with my ex-girlfriend, I had a feeling the end was nigh-ish. This was just a feeling I had, as things with us were going great. In any event, I decided to get some insurance. We were taking a shower together, and I peed on her. I did this without warning, and for the sole purpose of being able to tell our mutual friends (primarily those on a single IRC channel) that I had peed on her, were she to break up with me. Well, like clockwork, she broke up with me a few weeks later, and I told everyone on IRC that I had peed on her. They all thought it was hilarious, and I think they made fun of her for it. We still laugh about it on IRC to this day. I think it's probably the best decision I ever made.

when i use the bathroom, i usually wait until i do it in the shower. i would pee in the shower as well as do #3 in the shower.

i cant stop finishing off sentences without ending it with "...its disgusting". i use it so much its disgusting.
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!

I know he will never cheat, I just wish i could have some sort of mind controll device so he will never even think of other women in a sexy or loving way.... other than his family.. they love part not the sexy part.

I don't understand those Man-Walks-Into-a-Bar jokes. Is there something wrong with me?

fat people should die and make more room for us sexy people.

i air-guitar way too much, is it a crime to love good music?

... what is #3?

#3

it's an (the?) eternal mystery.

this one is actually v true for me too

If I ever go into a store (especially a dept. store) I get this INCREDIBLE urge to flail my arms everywhere and knock down all the glass and dishes. It would seriously be like a dream come true. When I go into any store with glass displays I have to hold my hands together or put them in my pockets.

Dunno. Strong chance that the most OTW posts above were probably spoofs posted by high school sophomores.

x-post

Quieting the Imps in Your Brainz

The fella who peed on his girlfriend needs to be introduced to the concept of cause and effect. And also to the front end of a speeding bullet train.

people still use irc?

The fella who peed on his girlfriend needs to be introduced to the concept of cause and effect.

He was already banned here, he needed some sort of outlet for his spleen.