The 2009 Australian Open (of tennis)

Figured it was about time to start this, even though it's not for a few days to build ANTICIPATION! I just went to the ahem "Medibank" Sydney International (pshaw, it'll always be the Peters NSW Open to me!) and am highly sunburnt in the legs even though I lathered them with sunblock.

I got to see the Demented Diva in the flesh at last! She was beautiful, but I'm still not ready to take her back. I also saw Sveta completely unable to control herself in the wind and nearly fall to pieces against Kaia Kanepi and her enormous thighs. Saw some of a wilting match between Mathieu and Seppi where the outcome was pretty much known because Seppi looked about three foot tall due to his defeatist body language - then saw the end of a fab doubles game between Mirnyi/Ram and Robredo/Lopez - which was PACKED (Sveta had barely anyone watching her) and finished watching teh Rad Wanksta and Maria Kirilenko (wearing a REALLY nice outfit for once) mop up Funky Cold Medina Garrigues and Ruano Pascual. I was amazed how hard Ruano Pascal hits the ball sometimes. Lots of top volleying from Kirilenko and bizarro angles from A-Rad.

Very entertaining. MOre when the draw's finalised I guess!

Time to check in WBS, Lex, Fred, Steady Mike et al..

lol u went to homebush for TENNIS??

Oh, and COVER UP YOUNG LADY I CAN ALMOST SEE YOUR FANNY.

I sure did KBP! And the place was absolutely crawling with cougars. And tomorrow I'm going to peel like a motherfucker.

Berdych lost to Guccione. This is obviously a great loss as far as attractiveness goes due to Gooch being so ugly that even if he were eight feet tall his height wouldn't make up for his features, but still.. LOL.

Men's odds (Outright Winner):

Andy Murray 2/1
Roger Federer 5/2
Rafael Nadal 7/2
Novak Djokovic 11/2
Jo-Wilfried Tsonga 12/1
Juan Martin del Potro 25/1
Gael Monfils 25/1
Ernest Gulbis 33/1
Gilles Simon 33/1
David Nalbandian 33/1
Andy Roddick 40/1
Richard Gasquet 66/1
Marcos Baghdatis 80/1
Fernando Gonzalez 80/1
Fernando Verdasco 80/1
Marat Safin 100/1
Marin Cilic 100/1
Lleyton Hewitt 100/1

Lol Hewitt

Hewitt being on centre court today meant that I could get all the tennis I wanted with a $9.90 ground pass and not bump into a single Fanatic. Times like these I'm GLAD he's staying around way past his peak in such an embarrassing fashion.

And the place was absolutely crawling with cougars.

Probably walked over from Rhodes. That place is Cougar City.

lol at the quasi-racist dull non-violent bogans Fanatics still following Hewitt.

Also: when are they gonna bring back the West End South Australian Men's Open and the RIO International?

I know it's apropos of nothing as Kim doesn't play anymore; but her dad (a famous footballer in his time) recently died at the age of 52. RIP. :-(

Kim Clijsters, I mean.

a famous footballer in his time

easy Belgium zing ;)

but yeh RIP

hey folks first male british win in a major since the 20's?

Aussie Kim

hey folks first male british win in a major since the 20's?

Not quite yet but I'd pick him for the US Open in September if he stays injury free this season.

TS: Aussie Kim Clijsters vs Tom Cruise, Australia's Favourite Son-In-Law (xpost)

1920s? Fred Perry was 1930s, dammit!

Seems odd that the bookies' assumption is that Murray is now ready to sweep through seven best-of-five matches against his peers. But he's the only one of the Big Four who is still clearly improving so favourite is probably about right. I'm wondering, was Nadal favourite for the 2005 French?

if he stays injury free

^so not gonna happen. I think he's bulked up so much in the last year or so that his body is starting to complain. The way he was pawing at his back all last week makes me wonder if he'll last seven five setters - if he pushes too hard for this one it could mess his whole season up.

do we have a lot of tennis fans here?
btw, if i were a bettor i'd love nadal's odds there

i think there's a good # altho watching the australian is kind of a pain for north americans

I know it's apropos of nothing as Kim doesn't play anymore

if only. women's draw is just so blah now

I don't even really enjoy watching the Williams sisters anymore unless they're playing each other.

well actually that's not true, Serena vs Jelena is always A+ entertainment even when one of them is off her game

haha i have a soft spot for invanovic (now #5 in the world!) but imo none of the other players on the womens tour is worth a williams it makes the slams pretty boring

I think Jelena wins a major this year; just not this one.

i dont follow things much anymore tbh but she got owned at the year end champ by venus that was the last time i've seen her (jelena) play. otoh she did manage to finish ranked first so... maybe? i guess the u.s.?

there has to be a decent thread in the glamour shots lookin photos female players choose for their wta profiles

She played her ass off at the US Open; she just needs to not be Princess Meltdown and she's got that this year.

I'm trying to figure out who the lolsiest women's major winner would be... I don't think anyone is a credible threat outside of the top 10, though?

none of this "maybe later in the season" fence-hedging for me re: our potential first-time winners - my early picks are murray and jankovic! (er, draws pending, obviously. so i might well play it safe in the end.)

Murray or Nadal is going to win the men IMO.

(altho I guess Nadal's been playing like the magic is gone? so maybe this is Monfils' big break!)

i'm gonna be a lifelong murray fan just because he played a challenger in my hometown about a year before he became famous. he's definitely an exciting player to watch - i think my favorite players tend to be headcases (see: safin, my favorite). I really like his chances at the Aussie because of how well he's been playing, but if i was a bettor, i'd be all over nadal at 7-2.

honestly i can't see serena not winning if she's on top of her game...she's so much ridiculously better than everyone else when she's on. i'm rooting for my girl ivanovic tho

btw wtf we need "i love tennis"

nadal wasn't very magic in losing to monfils in doha last week - though extrapolating on the basis of one tournament is unwise, and my murray pick is more to do with how incredible his form was there, his rate of improval, federer's continued subpar play and djokovic looking tetchy and unfocused in his 1st-round loss to gulbis last week.

agree that jankovic vs les williamses is the best rivalry going: she's got the most even h2h with them of any active player - the only two-set match she's played w//venus was in 05, when she was basically a baby.

JANKOVIC, Jelena (SRB) Versus Venus WILLIAMS (USA)

Year Tournament Round Surface Winner Score
2005 Stanford QF Hard (O) V.WILLIAMS 3-6 3-6
2006 Rome QF Clay (O) V.WILLIAMS 7-5 4-6 1-6
2006 Wimbledon 32 Grass (O) J.JANKOVIC 7-6(8) 4-6 6-4
2007 Charleston SF Clay (O) J.JANKOVIC 3-6 6-3 7-6(5)
2007 French Open 32 Clay (O) J.JANKOVIC 6-4 4-6 6-1
2007 U.S. Open QF Hard (O) V.WILLIAMS 6-4 1-6 6-7(4)
2008 Rome QF Clay (O) J.JANKOVIC 5-7 6-2 6-3
2008 Stuttgart SF Hard (I) J.JANKOVIC 6-7(8) 7-5 6-2
2008 WTA Tour Championships SF Hard (O) V.WILLIAMS 2-6 6-2 3-6
Jelena JANKOVIC (SCG) Leads Venus WILLIAMS (USA) : 5 to 4

JANKOVIC, Jelena (SRB) Versus Serena WILLIAMS (USA)

Year Tournament Round Surface Winner Score
2004 San Diego 32 Hard (O) S.WILLIAMS 7-6(3) 3-6 2-6
2005 Dubai SF Hard (O) J.JANKOVIC 6-0 4-3 RET
2006 Los Angeles SF Hard (O) J.JANKOVIC 6-4 6-3
2007 Australian Open 16 Hard (O) S.WILLIAMS 3-6 2-6
2008 Hopman Cup 2008 Hard (I) S.WILLIAMS W/O
2008 Australian Open QF Hard (O) J.JANKOVIC 6-3 6-4
2008 Miami FR Hard (O) S.WILLIAMS 1-6 7-5 3-6
2008 U.S. Open FR Hard (O) S.WILLIAMS 4-6 5-7

Serena WILLIAMS (USA) Leads Jelena JANKOVIC (SCG) : 4 to 3

i think my favorite players tend to be headcases (see: safin, my favorite)

safin is my favourite too! or was, until i finally realised that emotional investment in his career is a mug's game. my women's favourites over the years have included novotna, majoli, myskina, dementieva and now zvonareva. fucking insane chokers, the lot of them. i don't know why i do it to myself.

serena looked bored & sluggish in sydney this week - had to save 4 match points against stosur (!) in the most lol women's match so far. (stosur went up 5-4, 40-0 in the third set, and promptly served two double faults in a row, followed by an error on a putaway volley.)

i say roger comes back at this on a total new year, new gameface and smokes all challengers including murray in the final. nadal out at the sf

He's already lost to Andy, and the year's not even a fortnight old. Andy ftw.

How likely is a Venus win?

i'd say better than 7/2

Really, the only contenders that come to mind (haven't seen any matches this year) are:

Venus/Serena cuz they're always contenders even when they're completely off
Jelena cuz she seems to be making the improvements to her game while retaining consistency
Elena cuz she's capable of surprising folks
Dinara cuz let's face it, she's probably another who will win her first major this year

pls to refer to the andys by their last name - i got all confused for a second there. Murray ftw, roddick ftg. i really hope roger comes back but dude did not look good at all last week.

i like safina. she's scrappy.

depends on her draw. she apparently played well in the HK exo, and none of the other top women look fearsome exactly. but she's only been past the QF here once, and off grass she just gives opponents far too many chances.

oh, and anyone looking for last season's slumpers to return to form will be sadly disappointed. szavay, chakvetadze and vaidisova all just lost embarrassing first-rounders this week (szavay to britain's own anne keothavong, who is on the verge of the top 50!).

am keeping an eye on new indian sensation somdev devvarman - he reached the chennai final last week, losing to cilic, but he's got a terrifically entertaining & impressive game - scampers about retrieving impossible shots but can also hit awesome flat, aggressive strokes of his own. kind of like a male zheng jie. he's in qualies this week, hopefully we'll see him in the main draw.

yeah, lex, i was about to give up on safin too, but then wimbledon! i just am in love with that two-hander...i think it's the best in the game when he's feeling it

venus has never won the aussie, partly i think because she's a much better fast-court player (of course, the old rebound-ace was basically a fast court, but still a bit slower and played higher than say, the US or obv wimbledon. though supposedly the new surface is a bit faster, so we'll see). she's going to have to do better than her sister, who has won this tournament three times. (xposts)

("depends on her draw" referred to venus there but applies to all of them really! the women's game is kind of in the doldrums at the moment)

xp

safin's already announced this is his last year btw (obv this does not mean it is) (he also turned up for his first 09 tournament a day late, sporting bruises and cuts on his face from a brawl he'd gotten into in moscow).

<3 <3

safin's already announced this is his last year btw (obv this does not mean it is)

haha indeed, let's hope he continues. i am wondering would winning another Grand Slam (say this one) make him stop earlier or later. I guess he'd be crazy enough to quit immediately. Rooting for a Safin win anyway. (Or Federer, but he seems to be in a grumpy mood, could be a disastrous year for him, though it wouldn't suprise me if Nadal gets injured for a couple of months, which would give Fed a chance to win at least Wimbledon)

that was funny. they asked dinara about the black eye and she was all, no idea what happened, i'm just glad he didn't get shot.

haha <3 safin. did roger look that bad in doha? man i was really hoping for a return to form this year altho it's not like its too late or anything

he didn't look that bad, just seemed mentally out of it.

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/telegraph/multimedia/archive/01215/safin1_1215692c.jpg

but a few days later

http://newsimg.bbc.co.uk/media/images/45372000/jpg/_45372585_safin_getty_416.jpg

<3

roger just looked sloppy...spraying FHs, not much focus. mentally not quite there as roz says. and this was against seppi and kohlschreiber, not even murray. i mean, i know he's trying to peak for the majors now, but i've seen this sloppy play from him so much over the past year that i've stopped ascribing it to "off days" and begun admitting that that's just his level now :(

:( :( he gets visibly frustrated more often now too. freaks me out a bit tbh - i'm so used to calm, collected fed.

he used to be kinda all over the place mentally earlier in his career i believe

Still think he'll get to that bit more of a focus to win a couple more slams.

All about Murray now -- surely the wait is over.

Also, we don't talk about doubles much beyond the obvious (that the Bryan twins should be killed), but I want to say this: no-ad games in doubles = SHIT.

Checking in - TF busy so nothing to report, save Serena looking tired and CGAF-ish during the warm-up season is nearly as reliable a portent to what is to come as Gooch thundering aces past duty Neville Nobodies and Newk and/or JA rhapsodising about how This Could Be His Year.....

Fuck. Public transport being flooded with dicks wearing sun visors.

Re Serena: being given fite by DaneWoz atm, down *3-5 in 1st

am watching williams/wozniacki - it's a pretty good match actually. (dane woz took the first set on a TB, which i didn't see, and is currently serving at *3-5 down in the second, having broken serena as she served for the set...)

It's 4-4 in the third.

Of course, everyone knows that when it comes to predicting Serena's performance in a slam based on warm-up events, the correct procedure is to examine her results carefully, then ignore them and flip a coin.

wozniacki served for it at 6-5, blew three match points - two by missing fairly standard FHs - and williams took the TB.

which makes 10 MPs saved by serena in total en route to the semi-finals!

Draw not released until Friday? It's usually Wednesday (with seedings announced on the Tuesday), isn't it? Is this some new measure to avoid the usual farce of sections of the draw being weakened by late withdrawals, and the #9 seed's spot taken by a lucky loser?

i think that might be just wimbledon...

portuguese wunderkind and "future of women's tennis" michelle larcher de brito is in qualifying - we have a decade of torture ahead of us if this is the case. if you thought serena and sharapova grunted loudly...

tbh i'm shocked that no one's actually murdered her on court yet. how the hell has she gotten away with this for so long?

i could not deal with that for 10 years. i can't see her ever getting a crowd on her side with that banshee screaming

hahahahahahaha what the hell

like i would throw shit at her

it's like serena/sharapova at their worst, with added sustain pedal.

sadly i suspect she's the real deal - beat radwanska when she was 14, took sets off serena and sveta last summer. sigh. or perhaps SCREEEAAAAMMMM.

A doubles match with her and Serena vs Jankovic and Sharapova would be amazing

hahahahaha i don't know if it's going to be annoying or hilarious to watch her play against sharapova

I always want to reassemble her name as "Michelle de Largeburrito".

Did Serena just lose one and three to ver Diva? Yes, she did. Well done Diva, even if Serena nearly losing her other matches indicates a care-factor of about zero for this warm-up.

exactly

you thought serena and sharapova grunted loudly...

haha hot damn i had enough of this after 3 hits.

DRAWS ARE OUT!

men's: http://www.australianopen.com/en_AU/scores/draws/ms/index.html
women's: http://www.australianopen.com/en_AU/scores/draws/ws/index.html

too tired to analyse fully now but will stick w/murray as my men's pick, and...hmm. it really is wide open on the women's side. at least the projected bepa vs jelena QF will guarantee us a quality match in the later rounds. the draw has probably worked out best for serena and dinara, maybe that will be the final...

i'm goin for andy too

will make predictions when i get home

ok i seem to be still awake. predictions!! for like the 4th round & beyond.

chicas

Jankovic d. Safarova
Zvonareva d. Shvedova
Safina d. Cornet
Wozniacki d. Kleybanova
V.Williams d. Pennetta
Cibulkova d. Dementieva
Radwanska d. Kuznetsova
S.Williams d. Azarenka

Zvonareva d. Jankovic
Safina d. Wozniacki
V.Williams d. Cibulkova
S.Williams d. Radwanska

Safina d. Zvonareva
S.Williams d. V.Williams

S.Williams d. Safina

dudes

Nadal d. Gasquet
Ancic d. Monfils
Murray d. Stepanek
Gulbis d. Tsonga
Nalbandian d. Kohlschreiber
Djokovic d. Soderling
Cilic d. Del Potro
Federer d. Berdych

Nadal d. Ancic
Murray d. Gulbis
Nalbandian d. Djokovic
Federer d. Cilic

Murray d. Nadal
Federer d. Nalbandian

Murray d. Federer

i should have had the guts to predict flavia flav beating venus - she's won 3 of their past 4 meetings, and one of those was at roland garros, so she's done it on the big stage. but...i can't!

First impressions is that the draw gods weren't very nice to Serena, but every timethis happens she plays like a monster and wins anyway.

Zvonareva d. Jankovic

Don't do this to yourself, Lex!

While I agree a Murray/Fed final would have to favour the former slightly on current form, I think Fed would ahve a better chance of beating Murray than Nadal... a Murray win would be great, particularly because his Scottishness would stick in the throats of those casual tennis fans that loved Henman so.

Why is Gilles Simon ranked so high?

i think the draw was great to serena!! the dangerous names in her section are either currently-useless slumpers (mauresmo, schiavone) or the kind of unathletic ballbasher she never has trouble with (azarenka, kvitova). in the QF, radwanska's soft-hitting game sadly plays straight into her hands. and by the time she's in the SF, she's played herself into form.

bepa and jelena played some really terrific matches last autumn - jankovic won the first three but they were all so close, and then bepa finally had her revenge at the year-end championships.

simon is one of only two players to have beaten all 3 of fed, nadal and djokovic in 2008...the other being murray. he won 3 tournaments and had some strong masters series results. i've still never seen him play properly though.

Simon had hell of form towards the end of last year, didn't he? Before the Masters Cup (or whatever that big end-of-season clash-of-titans thing is called).

Anyway - hi.

Nadal-Gasquet
Monfils-Simon
Murray-Stepladder
Bulges-Ljubicic (assuming Tsonga's crocked)
Lllllodra-Robredo
Baghdatis-Djokovic
Pot Roast-Cilic
Stan-Fedge

(from there - one of Les Fronchies causes SHOCK NADAL EXIT HORROR, and I'mma pick Monfils for that; Murray will take him in a five-set epic in semi 1. Djokovic beats Fedge in semi 2, and takes the title because everyone's all wow about Murray beating Nadal which has left Novak free to develop new style of pre-serve bouncing, where each bounce lasts a full two minutes, and Murray's frustration at this causes him to punch a spectator in the face - Djokovic claims he didn't want to win the title this way, but his uncontrollable laughter kind of suggests otherwise)

Jankovic-Safarova
Mirza-Kirilenko
Safina-Hantuchova
Wozniacki-Arvidsson
Venus-GTA Santangelo
Cibulkova-Dementieva
Vaidisova-Radwanska
Azarenka-Serena

(Having put her in the last 16, I may as well go the whole hog and tip Sofia Arvidsson for the actual damn title, cos it's about as likely - but nah, Safina takes Jankovic in semi 1, Serena takes Venus in semi 2, but Safina does for her in an EPIC of a final. Marat runs onto court and dislocates his shoulder while trying to hug her)

From these picks, you may perhaps suggest that I am not entirely in touch with the tennis at present, and I would have to reply: "Yes". You may also suggest I've only put Santangelo in the last 16 because that's probably the best pun I've come up with on one of these threads in the past two years. And I would have to reply: "Maybe".

Also - Keothavong to make it to round three.

Murray d. Federer

― lex pretend

I'd go with that, and I think Federer might well give Murray another lesson in winning slams.

oops I thought you has Murray v. Federer :)

So, uh, Federer d. Murray

I'd expect Murray to beat Federer if he gets that far. I'd doubt he'd be as overawed as he was at the US Open and hopefully will have had the same amount of rest as Federer.

^^agree with that. Murray's rate of improvement, as in figuring out difft opponents & situations, has been remarkably steady & rapid to date. It's a bit reminiscent of Djokovic last year.

How like Dementieva would it be to play heroically to reach the final, beating both Williamses back-to-back in dramatic three-set classics, and then, once there, lose to like Petrova or someone. From a set and 5-1 up.

lex u could realistically replace ANY of the women's tour player's names with dementieva's there

ok the qualifying is done & dusted! interesting qualifiers:

- former world no 4 Kimiko Date, now Kimiko Date-Krumm, making a comeback at the age of 38. she played almost exclusively low-level tournaments in Japan last year, which was enough to get her inside the top 200
- former teenage prodigy/drugs bannee/Sharapova trash-talker/pregnancy-faker/"thunderous return" promiser Sesil Karatantcheva (all that and she's still just 19). She has a great shot at the 3rd round, where she will be double bagelled by Silliams
- two further GBR girls to join Keothavong and South in the main draw, wtf? I guess it's true that when one girl breaks through, she drags others from her country upwards in her wake
- SPREMBLEDON! haha, remember when Karolina Sprem beat Venus at Wimbledon and she was meant to be the next big thing, and then her career died
- one Lamine Ouahab, who I believe is the first Algerian to compete at a Slam?
- Evgeny Korolev, cousin of a certain Ms Kournikova

EPIC FAILS in qualifying go to Devvarman, Screamer de Brito (we are spared for the time being) and Radwanska Minor.

Also, I'm calling this now: shock 1R upset of Ivanovic at the hands of Gorgeous Goerges.

Azarenka vs Kvitova should be a good 1R match, if you like extreme ball-bashing - I expect Kvitova to make the top 20 at least this year, if not the top 10.

one Lamine Ouahab, who I believe is the first Algerian to compete at a Slam?

Not quite! Slimane Saoudi lost 4-6 6-2 5-7 6-3 6-7(3) to Ivo Heuberger in the 1st round of the 2002 US Open! :p

The Kimiko Date thing is interesting though! 38 blimey, didn't realise that.

Hewitt v Gonzalez: wow rather tough for a 1st round match!

To be fair, haven't the Brit girls generally been regarded as on the brink for a little bit? Baltacha's qualified here before, and apparently KO'B was one match away last year. The men, by contrast, have generally got a reputation for being workshy chancers - no Grand Slam is quite complete without the papers putting the boots to Alex Bogdanovic, is it?

gah, forgot about Saoudi completely, even though I probably actually noted "first Algerian" at the time!

Baltacha and O'Brien have been playing Slam qualies for years and years and years now - to have only come through once between them is really astonishingly poor, even for girls in that ranking range. I can actually see Baltacha putting together a run towards the top 100 on the back of this though. O'Brien, not so much.

I hope Gonzalez triple-bagels Chewitt :D

I am wondering whether to go nocturnal for this fortnight or not...

......And they're off!

First up on Channal Brucie is Julia Goerges (at least that's how the on-screen graphic spells it) v Ivanovic. Quaintly and confusingly, the 'latest scores' window on the ATO website has had Djoko playing Tsonga forabout the last 50 weeks.

i love the aussie open becz i'm usually up late (us eastern time) and i like seeing live tennis in the middle of the night.

Girl Goerges has broken Ivanovic - meanwhile, on MCA Vera 'Vinegar Tits' Zvonareva showing nothing ever changes much against Magdalena Rybarakobama (or something like that) going down 3-1 in the first - the receiver is currently up on the server by the same margin. Tommy Berd nearly broke Rob the Slob for the second time.

oh jesus christ i finally got the stream to work and now my wireless signal is inexplicably dropping in and out. why must fucking computers wreck my life at every turn. seriously why do i suddenly have no signal???

lol at michelle largeburrito

yes lex I've been fighting computer + stream deliverers for 40 mins now too and got FED UP enough to pay for a month of eurosport online. Grr I am off to bed soon anyway, just wanted to watch a nice short twosetter to put me to sleep ffs! Technology not keeping pace with hype & promises = big fucking DUD.

Hehe I believe it's actually "larger burrito"!

Ana has slipped up a gear although Goerges is still battling away - back on serve, Ivanovic threatening to break again but blows three chances,this game becoming vital esp for Gurgles.

Technology not keeping pace with hype & promises = big fucking DUD.

i know right. all i want to know is why my signal is suddenly dropping in and out? no one ever fucking explains technological bullshit like this.

Bepa 3 broken back by Rybarackobama (<- nice one btw), I keep forgetting how little holds and breaks actually mean in the ladies'. 5 all now.

Oh and dropouts: first thing to try is reset the router/transmitter thingy (pull plug and the replug). If that doesn't work then I have no cure.

the = then

ugh i can't go into the room with the router cuz someone's crashing on the sofa, which is why i'm trying to watch the stream in the first place. why can't technology just fucking work as it should. i mean why the fuck has it chosen now to give me ONE BAR of signal??? why why why why why why WHY?

ugh i can't go into the room with the router cuz someone's crashing on the sofa, which is why i'm trying to watch the stream in the first place. why can't technology just fucking work as it should. i mean why the fuck has it chosen now to give me ONE BAR of signal??? why why why why why why WHY?

:(

americans watching on espn2: what do we think of this new score box thingy at the bottom? i'm categorically pretty averse to this change at first, but i really dotn like this one! CBS' from last year was great

this type of change*

aaand unless I've missed something, Tsvetana Pironkova is this year's first winn4r, closely followed by major prospect (sez my stat calculations) Patricia Mayr of Austria; beating Sprem & Schruff respectively.

whereas B3 beats Magda in time-honoured fashion ie tiebreak in the 1st, bagellation in the 2nd. Night now.

vague notes on what has just gone, in between me cursing everything to do with computers...

Krumm vs Kanepi was a strange match - despite Kaia being one of the hardest hitters on tour, and Krumm being like 900 years old, it was the latter who was dictating, because Kaia was hitting very hard but either directly at Krumm, or out. And Krumm had obviously decided to try to take control of every point asap, w/angles and placement and so on. She played a number of great setpiece points - wrongfooters, chip-and-charges - but I think this strategy forced her to go for too much too soon, and she made some nervous errors. But she's just won the second set, so maybe the tide is turning! Also, she looks so much fitter than Kanepi. It's embarrassing that the 38-year-old looks like a supremely fit athlete, and the 22-year-old is obese. Seriously, you'd never be able to tell Krumm's age.

When I switched to Bepa 3's match the first thing I saw was Bepa bashing her racket repeatedly into her hand. UH-OH. She had some completely stupid Slam losses last year, but Rybarikova was really impressive in the first set, so it's not just Bepa being Bepa. Didn't watch after the TB but it looks like Rybarikova fell apart somewhat.

Gorgeous Goerges and "Aussie Ana"...wow, that's as brainless as ball-bashing gets. Goerges must have missed four smashes to give up her early break, and in the final break of that set just bashed three straight FHs long.

Haha, a friend in the US on the Roddick/Rehnquist thrashing: "Roddick is clearly enjoying the novelty of not having the worst backhand on court for once"

The FOAT away v Potito (Oztalk for what 'spud' is slang for) and already facing his first break point....saved.

Notice 'Every Sprem Is Sacred' is already out of the tornament after a bagel and a 4 to Pironkova. 'Aussie Ana' home without convincing many of much and you can read all about it in tomorrow's Age.

Kelvin Klein kloses out second set with two aces to go 2-0 up. The FOAT now 2-1 up after a second tie-break victory over Spud.

Elsewhere, a new-look streamlined Marcos Baghdatis well in control, two sets and a break up on United Colors, Del Potroast, Tommy Berd and Jose Ferrar all through, Herrabbitty also in Round 2 after monstering John 'King Kong' Isner.

plz plz plz do not keep using these moronic nicknames srsly dude id like to continue reading this thread

After years of ILX GS threads, I'm afraid it's a somewhat unbreakable tradition by now, Lamp.

Watched a bit of Ana InTheVan vs. Gorgeous via some stream or other last night - Ana was doing fist-pumps for every single point that she took, which wouldn't have been quite so worrying if she'd been responsible for winning them. Congratulating yourself because your opponent has just lumped yet another forehand long seems a bit... desperate. Would suggest she might not be in title contention.

Then again, Maria Kirilenko's already made my last-16 picks look like rubbish by losing 6-0 6-4 to Unheralded Italian Sara Errani, and Laurence Llewellyn Llodra's also bitten the dust in mildly feeble fashion against Dr Xavier. Kirilenko is one of three seeds vanquished today - the others being Agnes Szavay, proving her recent loss to Keothavong was no fluke with a three-set dumping by Gorgeous Pouting Kazakh Galina Voskoboeva, and Flicka Lopez, who lost 6-3 7-6 4-6 4-6 16-14 to Gilles Muller.

In Keeping It Positive news, though, CazWoz dismissed Sha Har Superstar 6-3 6-2, which is a pretty impressive achievement.

Make that four seeds - Sybille Bammer's just been squidged 6-3 6-1 by Safarova.

And in further "I'm crap at this" news, Arvidsson's out an' all, 7-5 7-5 to Klobberin' Kleybanova. But! Out on court three, Heroically Plucky Brit Anne Keothavong has gritted her teeth, dug in hard, stepped up to the plate, given 110%, raised her game etc. and salvaged the second set against Chakattak on a tie-break to level at one set all. If Chaka's legendary match-playing instincts kick in, who knows what could happen?

Sixteen? He's SIXTEEN?

Well, Anne's just held serve, but it's a bit of a shame that's she's given Chakk a five-game head start...

And that's that for Keothavong, going down 6-1 6-7 6-1 in the end. Lennie Baltacha, a nation turns its lonely eyes to you...

Gorgeous Pouting Kazakh Galina Voskoboeva

Hang on, are the Kazakhs actively recruiting or something? I noted Shvedova (KAZ) last week, and now this -- surely both of these played for Russia before? Plus Sesil Suggest Ban Karatantcheva is apparently about to change flags as well.

The Chak Attack cruises, 6-1, 6-7, 6-1. Which is about how I thought it'd go. Elsewhere in Plucky Brit news, CAKE has eked a straight-set vengeance on Melanie South for beating her last week (score: 1-1, ret., obv).

Szavay losing to Voskoboeva (!) really is a new low for her (having hit her previous nadir last week with the loss to Keothavong).

Mirza d. Domachowska in the battle of the endless slumpers. Domachowska's ranking will die now!

Shocked that Dokic beat Paszek, incredibly bad from Tamira.

CazWoz dismissed Sha Har Superstar 6-3 6-2, which is a pretty impressive achievement

hrrm have you seen Peer's recent results? oh, apropos of nothing, apparently when she played Auckland the other week, she had to deal with Gaza protestors picketing the tournament and demanding her withdrawal. Because obviously, a teenage female tennis player is exactly the right target for your ire! What utter idiots.

Aussies, is the Tomic hype annoying you yet? What's he like? All I know is that he's meant to be badly-behaved on court. Oh god I thought we'd basically got rid of Lleyt the Llout for good and now there's another one.

Korolev beat Moya easily, wonder what he can do against Federer...nothing, probably.

Baghdatis won his 1R. I wonder if this will be a renaissance? Again, probably not, but if it takes him past Soderling in the next round it'll all be good.

Peer one of the biggest clay specialists on the tour as well, right? Ie code for "somewhat rubbish on fast".

Hang on, are the Kazakhs actively recruiting or something? I noted Shvedova (KAZ) last week, and now this -- surely both of these played for Russia before? Plus Sesil Suggest Ban Karatantcheva is apparently about to change flags as well.

yeah they're offering $$$ (or, y'know, the Kazakh equivalent...I have no idea what the tenge symbol is) to a bunch of journeymen and women for...I have no idea, actually. Probably the same reason that they hired Norman Foster to build a climate-controlled city within a tent in Astana (ie: those Central Asian states be crazy). Shvedova, Voskoboeva, Schukin, Kukushkin and Golubev have all been tempted away from Mother Russia so far - Special K is the first non-Russian to take this step but then she's crazy, and keeps complaining about receiving no support from the Bulgarian federation (I wonder why!).

Peer reached the QF here a couple of years back and gave Serena hell! She looked like she could be a really good all-rounder then. It's just that her career's been in freefall for a while, she's out of the top 40 and heading downwards. Not quite as dramatic as the Strange Death of Nicole Vaidisova's Career, but she was never going to challenge WozDEN.

Oh thank fuck Craybas is out.

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/5/51/Tenge_symbol.jpg/100px-Tenge_symbol.jpg!

!!

Queer Eye also disposed of early, excellent.

Hantuchova has just taken the first set on a tie-break against Dellacqua, but watching Dellacqua repeatedly failing to put her away was torture - she squandered set point after set point after set point, then finally succumbed after putting a cross-court return thingy at the net inches wide... poor lass.

Both of them are on a ranking freefall alert.

"Yes, a bundle of laughs, a bundle of drama...coming your way..."

This is the best thing about the Australian Open on Australian TV - tennis commentators trying to hype the upcoming television season.

Neither of them is much cop at holding serve, either. The first five or six games of that tie-break were all against serve. Hantuchova just gone and held serve then, tho, marvellous.

Incidentally, Fabrice le Fabuleux raced into a 6-3 6-2 lead over JCF... and then JCF took the third set on tie-break. Spectators on Court Six reportedly "getting comfy".

OH MY GOD the umpire tonight is wearing a Lacoste knockoff top.

xpost to whoever asked about Tomic's on-court antics: I haven't heard anything too negative about Master Tomic himself, although his dad is One To Watch in the obnoxious tennis parent stakes. However, Brydon Klein, who also won today, does have a reputation fom his junior days for pork-choppish behavior on court and may have defaulted out at Wimbledon juniors (more info needed).

Watching Casey Delinquent balls up that set was the kind of torture that only tennis (and following West Ham Utd and Carlton) can provide. The Coathanger (that's Hantuchova, Lampster) has already broken in set 2.

Oh, I love obnoxious tennis parents.

For what it's worth, Casey D is the Lance Whitnall of Women's Tennis.

And now she's 40-0 up as the Coathanger serves for the match....

40-30, and 86 unforced errors between them....

All over, Casey can get back in her Monaro and go home....

OH MY GOD IT'S WALLY MASUER SHILLING WINE!!

This SEP bloke looks like Randall out of Clerks.

i'm kind of sick of this federer pattern against scrubs - first-set blowout and then sloppy, annoying bullshit which makes for a close (but not particularly entertaining) second set which he's never in any danger of actually losing

He was in some danger of losing it - Seppi had set point and only just missed a line with a backhand - though I expect the third set to go the way of the first.

Seppi was ranked 35, which makes him just about the best unseeded player in the tournament. The game was never going to be a doddle for Rodge, and it wasn't.

That said, at one stage he had a first serve % of 43 and he was outnumbered on break point chances by something like 12 to 4 in the last two sets. He did not look anywhere near as invincible ase used to.

OH NOES Agnieszka Radwanska is out! Kateryna Bondarenko is a bitch of a first round opponent to get. And look, Lleyton won the first set. I have been supportive of him in the past but really ffs it's over retire now and spend time with your orange bird and your stinkily-named kidlings.

this press conference w/serena has taking a turn for the o_O

NOW MIT TRANSLATIONS for newcomers.

ANd look, Britishes! Baltacha is beating up Lena GR (Anna-Lena Groenfeld) who I repeatedly tipped for big things and the only big thing I ended up seeing was her forearms. Schade. In some lol match-ups, Batty Patty (Patty Schnyder) looks like being committed to a flight out of Tullarmarine early, Bondarenko Sr has made it 2 from 2 and LOL Vaid The Impaler (Nicole Vaidisova, wasn't she going to win a slam one day) is playing accidental slam QF-ist Severine Bremond. The Graceful Gazelle (Gisela Dulko) is winning. Hooray for that.

Oh good, Lloudmouth (Lleyton Hewitt) has gone down a break in the second. Just like glory days.

And UGH. Scooch (Chris Guccione) is winning. Fuck patriotism, I cannot support him, he's just so ugly.

lleyton hewitt: good for one set and no more

The sooner all the Orstrayans are out the sooner the quality of matches actually shown on TV will increase.

Other things happening - every women's match where one person was ahead has now flipped. Damn. Jessica Moore, an Australian girl, has got back into a match. Great. LOSE! Dulko lost the second set. Ton of Sugar (Tamarine Tanasugarn) is looking like she will lose.

Benesova beat the Douchebag (Vera Dushevina) with one of those silly scorelines 6-4 0-6 6-2 that seem to pop up so much. The still hot Igor Andreev is losing. Ernests Gulbis, the NEXT BIG THING (literally) is cruising, Batty Patty has recovered, Windy My Son (Gael Monfils) is cruising, The Other One (Venus Williams) probably won't drop a game here, and Victor Hanescu had a game that went to 8-6 in the fifth and probably nobody cares.

Rainer Schuttler lost too. GOOD.

Lleyton was threatening to win the fourth set but has given his break back.

Giggles at web incompetence: the scoreboard thingy on all the slams allows you to pick a few favourite players to bookmark. Top seeds or favourites are usually bookmarked by default. Except oops, the Aus Open one has Maria Sharapova as the default player. She's not even playing.

Oh god he got another break and won anyway sdjfsjfsdjfsdjfslfjsldfsdfjsldfjsd.

the Strange Death of Nicole Vaidisova's Career

wau you are Not Kidding. Séverine! 2&1!

Good job, Chewit. Ugh.

the Strange Death of Nicole Vaidisova's Career

wau you are Not Kidding. Séverine! 2&1!

for the second Slam running!

Many stupid chokes and nearly-chokes last night. A-Pav contrived to lose a 4-0 final set lead to Garbin, blowing at least two match points along the way. Barrois (who has a really unique, funky game btw - all slices and net forays) executed a textbook first-set choke against Demented, but the Diva really is the queen of the unnecessary three-setter and nearly couldn't take advantage. She has a really strong three-set record, but I would suggest that this is perhaps less because she's such a FIGHTER!!!!11 than because she tends to embroil herself in three-setters where most players would need only two.

A-Rad was pretty woeful against K-Bond. I've never seen her hit that many basic errors before. K-Bond didn't seem to want to take advantage for a while - blew a 5-4, 40-0 first set lead and needed 8 set points to take it, but A-Rad pretty much handed the decider to her on a plate. Xmas isn't over!

Right, so, Rodionova and Gajdosova. They're marked as AUS on the draw sheet and got huge crowd support in their losses today. Do the crowd not realise that for 48 weeks for the year, they're RUS and SVK respectively, and their AUS citizenship only manifests itself in Australian tournaments where they can get wild cards etc.

WTF was that from Sorana Cirstea. 2-6, 2-6 to Czink? Seriously? She will never be a top player.

Totally unsurprising seed exits: Lisicki beat WozCAN, Peng beat Schiavone.

Chewitt out! I actually don't want him to retire. Watching him lose 1R all over the place is like my reward for enduring his brief spell at the top of the game.

Wussquet is ridiculous. Decided to spend 4 hours running around playing defensively against a Challenger hack in this heat. Why do I support this loser.

Disappointingly tame loss for Nishikori against Melzer :(

Terrible start to the season for Tammy T :(

Really unlucky draw for last week's first-time titlist Kvitova against the previous week's first-time titlist Azarenka - Kvitova's game is so huge that she could have gone very far here, but Azarenka was a terrible match-up - someone who can hit almost as hard, but is less wild. Azarenka's been known for her mental weakness in the past, but maybe finally winning her first tournament has given her a new lease of life?

Watching Flake vs Dancer...such brainless ball-bashing from both. Not unentertaining though, in its way. Dancevic's hair is an abomination, though. It's even worse because he has the face of a model, yet chooses to top it with...what even is that. A permed topknot. Jesus.

Hewitt out in the first round! GOOD TIMES, HAPPINESS AND JOY ARE HERE!

Gajdosova was marked as SVK at the Sydney International last week.

Damn, hit submit too early. Nice opportunism if you can get it, but blatant. At least use AUS at all domestic tournaments even if you don't need the wildcard.

I remember she changed her nationality w/much fanfare last year, and then immediately reverted to SVK after Australia. I was disappointed that no one tried it for Wimbledon tbh.

Oh great. Stosur won. She made tennis look like it is about as pleasant as epic constipation.

WTF!
http://www.australianopen.com/en_AU/news/articles/2009-01-19/200901191232362472765.html?promo=hp_toparticles

1. Jelena Dokic still has fans?
2. Jelena Dokic has fans outside Serbia and Australia?

My mind = blown.

I think you'll find Stose and Pollypullover were playing misere tennis and Sammy the Stoat in fact lost. She played a great first six games of set 1, and a second tiebreaker that would have challenged anybody in town, but oh the slop she served up (pun intended) in between!!~

Hewitt looks headed for Gonesville. Now for the absolute boring tennis nightmare: past 10 pm, a nobody at one end, Rafael Nadal at the other, and Jim Courier on standby. My entry in the 'when will it end' sweep: 1.43 pm with Rafa winning in four.

Jelena has more fans than you'd think but they are afraid to come out of the closet in case Damir is waiting outside with a baseball bat.

Nadal's knee supports and his rolled-down socks are making him look very roller derby-ish.

Them and the luminous yellow headband and wristbands. And the girly hair.

Zakapullover went for the 'glow in the dark' look too. Fat lot of good etc....

Raf is a seriously ugly fellow. Seriously.

1. Jelena Dokic still has fans?
2. Jelena Dokic has fans outside Serbia and Australia?

They're called breasts, Edward.

Can we start a campaign for her to bring BACK the mole?

Congratulations to Christophe Rochus on winning his first game v Nadal, three games into set 2.

HI DERE! Crayon crunchers will get another chance to use the dire "Icy Pole" pun as les souers Radwanska are winning in the doubles. 'Course, considering their opponents are Tammy T and Jill lol Craybas this should not be a surprise.

I really have to get pay TV. Ana Ivanovic is so pretty to look at but her game is boring. I'd rather be watching Palindrome (Malin Cilic) vs Tipsy McStagger (Janko Tipsaveric). Little Miss Marat (Dinara Safin) is in trouble against a Russian of whom I've never heard. Desenchantee (Natalie Dechy) is winning, thus upping the tedium quotient of today. Our Sania (Mirza) looking bad against Nadia's Pet Rover (obvious enough). Kaia Kanepi, who was recently a 2-point gift to me in a game of Scattergories, and her still enormous thighs are looking the good today as well.

LOL at Dokic/Tomic on centre court tonight. A nation will probably weep at least once. Methinks this is how England can be competitive at Eurovision again - send ethinc Slavs!

OMG Dokic and Tomic for the night session - I might have to go to bed now to wake up early for it! Actually I might watch a bit of the shoulda-been-a-porn-movie Cilic/Tipsarevic match first...

LOL name of the day: C. Ebelthite, which sounds like a mineral. Ebelthiteite. He's playing with Gajdosova's fiance so no doubt this will be the last appearance.

Ebelthite sounds like someone with a lisp trying to curse.

And now, to get the Bitching about the Aussie Media in full flight: Dear Channel 7, Ana Ivanovic is winning easily and there's a sodding injury time out ANYWAY. Could we please see an actually interesting game, i.e. Cilic/Tipsarevic or, you know, the higher-seeded Safina who looks like she might very well lose? THANKS.

UHHHHH DINARA!

i might have to stay up now!

really, really want to see a safin-federer round 3

Dinara's got the second set. Brief flip to the crowd showed them going mildly nuts but not very.

hey this Makarova chick is actually really good - can see why she took that first set off Safina. great lefty FH, good movement, good BH, went for her shots and made a fair few. she couldn't quite keep pace with Safina, who was playing pretty fucking well herself, in that second set though.

"Here are your commentators, Darren Cahill and John Alexander".

Someone kill me. Safina looking home and hosed now.

Hey, Cilic/Tipsarevic. CRO vs SRB. Insane fans. Top entertainment!

If Ancic is Sultry Brown Cow Eyes, then Cilic is Sultry Brown Anime Eyes.

Someone must have won something, Richmond station is full of ethnic blokes in CAPES yelling all excitedly.

(that is the localest station btw)

Agree that St Bernard on centre court after one match is a complete joke - hype gone mad.

If he gats touched up (which is entirely likely) all that will be remembered is how the young hotshot got taken for a ride by the world no 79 or thereabouits. Not that he was 700 places lower at the time.

And what about Lleyton the Lloser's crack about being retired before Tomic cracks the top 100?

Bitters lime and lemon for Mr Hewitt, and hold the lime and lemon.

Woke up just in time to see the super-dramatic end of the Lu/Fat Dave Nalbandian match! It is not natural to get my heart pounding like that 10 seconds after being asleep. Nalbandian has like 7/8 break points in the last game but couldn't take any...

WTF was that, Troicki. No one should be getting thrashed that heavily by Robredo.

PHM lost from two sets up? Quelle surprise. I guess he was 5-1 up in the decider as well?

Three bagels in a row for Bepa 3! :D And great to see Safarova winning that epic, hopefully we;ll see her back in the top 30 at least this year.

Good to see CAKE navigating a difficult opponent in straight sets; sad though unsurprised by Crazy Monica's loss.

Cilic should be top 10 by Wimbledon.

Wow, Baghdatis looks old. Wasn't it just the other year that he was the hot young thing swashbuckling his way to the final. Still! He's just broken in the decider against Soderling. Gooooo Baghy!

Oh no, it's the fourth set, not the decider. Even better!

(NB: Baghdatis's ranking has slipped to 97 due to injuries, inaction, laziness, lack of work ethic &c)

BAGHY TAKES IT!!

Now, train harder this time, and play like that in all your tournaments.

LOL, Eurosport commentators on Kohlschreiber.

*dramatic voice* "Boris Becker said this man would be a future top 10 player. (Beat.) He said that quite a few years ago."

Saw snatches of Baghdatis on Monday. Has he had a haircut and a shave and a general image make-over so he looks like an athlete instead of a victim of a combine harvester hit & run, or was I confusing him for the guy he was playing?

BTW Dokic doing rather well ATM.

Sandshoe Face in an early spot of bother as Malisse serves for the first set

Jelena breaks in the second. Roddick down a set.

If this was someone a bit more compelling, a bit more consistent, a bit less...2002 than Xavier Malisse, I'd really fancy an upset here. Nothing gets the juices flowing on a stressful morning in the office than the prospect of a Roddick night-session defeat in Melbourne...

And Dokic hands back her break....

...but immediately breaks back with very little difficulty and will now serve for the match.

....very badly. Now Dokic 5-4.

OMG Malisse OMG GO GO GO!

I have about as much faith in him as Mike though.

I actually woke up to watch Dokic/Chak Attack - I assume it's a horror show. Did you see Dokic's emotional press conference the other day? Uh, anyway I am not watching it b/c Eurosport is showing Santoro/Kohlschreiber and it's SO GOOD.

Santoro is great :)

just had v confusing sensory moment whereby the Chak Attack reached SP on the internet streaming and Fabulous Fabrice reached triple MP on my TV at exactly the same time and I tried to watch both at the same time.

surprisingly, Chak took hers and Santoro blew all three of his!

but he got a 4th and has got it now! he looked like he could barely walk at the end - oldest man to win two matches at the AO since 1978, apparently. may he never retire.

Who was it in 1978? Ken Rosewall?

How old is Santoro anyway? i remember him as a young buck in the early 90's

36, I think they said?

Dokic up a break (again) in the third set. I never realised ow much I missed her SHOO! Only cute grunt in existence.

*how

Oh god both Dokic and Chakvetadze look on the verge of tears and we're only three games into the third set. The way Chak twists herself out of frustration after she serves a DF or makes a stupid error is oddly reminiscent of modern ballet.

Yeah, Santoro born Dec '72. Which means he'd have been taking his Baccalauréat when I was doing my Masters. Still, it's nice to be only the span of an undergraduate degree away from a current pro.

Haha incredible!

I think Dokic will now replace Hingis in my heart as the unloveable comeback ex-prodigy kid.

Try as she might, it looks like JD will fail to make a total pig's ear of this match. She just held after at one stage serving five faults in a row,

I actually had to cover my eyes in that game.

One terrific point amidst the ineptitude - Chak showing otherworldly anticipation to track down a Dokic FH drive for a successful pass.

Jelena Jelena Jelena, why the hell do you insist on getting tangled into baseline rallies with this girl when you know as well as I do that you'll lose out every time????

22 double faults between them :o

Dokic moves ahead 5-3. Does anyone anywhere have any faith that she can close it here?

Or, Chak might just DF it all away.

The sort of first serve percentage this pair are producing wouldn't get you a drink drive conviction.

Double faults from Anna Chak notwithstanding, no.

Dokic has match point.

OMG a great serve to save match point!!

And again....

Great FH to bring up another MP, FH into the net to blow it...

jesus god another DF from Chak AGHHH

Dokic wins on yet another Chak DF. An apt ending!

Game ends appropriately with a Chak double fault....great minds etc.

Malisse's hair looks weirder every year.

Aw, Dokic tears. I'm a Chak supporter but emotional comebacks are always good to see.

Malisse's hair is gross and his game is useless and his attitude sucks.

his attitude does, but he does have some talent ;)

Oh, he has talent, but what use is it if you play TBs as ineptly as this. Now that I'm watching it I realise I actually dislike Malisse more than Roddick, but of course if Malisse wins there isn't much danger of him going that much further.

he won't win anyway, Malisse is the guy that takes 1 or 2 sets from every top player but then ruins it anyway.

Apparently Miss Dokic had a GUTSY win! Gutsy!

santoro, baghdatis, safin, gasquet are all safe for the moment; i am v happy

and Tomic is out, predictably. He'd have just been pwned by PotRoast next round anyway!

Lennie The Bruce and Mesmo on the court now, streaming on the BBC website. Sam Smith's last line of commentary before the match started: "Hopefully they're both fit and they can both finish the match." Not exactly unfair comment, but still...

Anyway, Amelie's got the early break of serve, leads 2-1.

Buuut three games on the spin puts Bally 4-2 up, and she is looking good - her power is really causing problems for Mauresmo at the moment. One point, though - Elena's moving around the court much more at present; her stamina could be tested a fair bit here.

Bally is a set up! 6-4, rounded off with a delicious drop-shot with both players marooned on baselines... she is looking very good. Mauresmo, not quite so much.

Mauresmo's experience is now running things she's up 4-6 6-3 5-2, Baltacha's confidence is gone - everything went long or in the net last game.

and it ends with a double fault. Baltacha looked really good at points, but you could tell which of them had won Grand Slams before - when Baltacha was on top, she couldn't stay there; when Mauresmo was on top, she tended not to let go.

Elsewhere, Gasquet and 'Dudi Sela' have both gone through (I vaguely recall Vic Hanescu used to be very good - is this no longer the case?) on the men's side, and there's victories for K-Bond, Cibulkova, Azarenka (who gets Mauresmo next), and The Diva, as well as Maria Jose Martinez Sanchez straight-setting Akgul Amanmuradova in a match that all the umpires must have been really looking forward to.

One seed down, though - and it's Batty Patty, trounced by Razzano 6-3 6-1.

And on court now - Goochie's candle flickered briefly when he took the first set against Simon, but he's on the verge of getting well and truly snuffed; Zheng and AMGWTF are both one game from victory against Czink and Coin respectively; Sreeener took the first set 6-3 against Dulks, but is a break down early in the second; and Melzer and Andy Beck are engaged in what looks to be a fair old ding-dong on Court 7, Melzer serving at 5-7 7-6 5-4.

argh safin dont tire yrself out

Aaah Bloody Safin. I passed up set 5 of Karlovic v SBCE to watch his pathetic effort partnering Canas in the dubs v two no-name Australians this afternoon. This rant will continue when I get my yearly -on the spot' report together.

should've predicted La Razz over Batty!

Peng over Special K. Maybe this is the year Peng finally breaks through. Oh, who am I kidding, she will never break through.

Cibulkova is tearing up the draw - into the third round and only two games lost so far. Have pencilled her in for the QF and, given that Venus has just lost the second set to Carla Suarez Navarro, maybe it could be further...

Possible all-Bond showdown in the next round! And both winnable matches, though given that we're talking about the Bond girls, also losable.

Tsonga vs Ljubicic was a fun match, until Ljubicic served at *6-3 in the third set TB, Tsonga saved the first two set points w/dropshots (!), and then Ljubicic died.

Good to see that the first set heroics of Gucci #1 didn't last. I want to see Simon go far here.

Hey, Suarez Navarro isn't bad. Don't be fooled by the ESP and the two surnames, she isn't a boring pusher at all - she's rallying well with Venus and has a lovely single-handed BH. Obviously she'll choke if she takes a lead in this third set but she's fun to watch. Also, reminds me how much I miss Justine :(

Wouldn't have minded seeing Razzano v BP.

Has La Razz kept with the contacts, or has she reverted to the Nana Moskouri look that made her such a crowd favorite up till last year?

I don't think I've seen a picture of La Razz in months!

CSN is hitting some amazing BH DTL winners and is really pushing Venus all over the court - Venus is having to play some incredible defence and passing shots. Which will probably get her though the match, but CSN just held for 1-1 in the third in an epic multi-deuce game...

Think Villiams may be home at last. We're seeing screen cutaways of the appalling Oracene looking slightly less worried,

I fell asleep last night after Lenny the Bruce (that's good, btw - is it one of mine?) dropped serve at the start of set two. Drop-shot on set-point apart, she wasn't playing particularly well (overhitting the forehand consistently) and I figured that Tony Le Mesmer only had to improve a notch and she'd sweep through.

OMG Venus broken as she serves for the match! That was a thrilling game, CSN stepped the fuck up there and hit some amazing winners.

Ugh, now 0-30 on her own serve.

Now it's 0-30 as CSN serves to consolidate beeak and stay on court.

EDIT: 15-30. She hasn't gone away yet.

EDIT EDIT: 30-30 as Villiams sprays a forehand.

CSN saves a MP and has adv...

5-5 OMG!!!

Villiams sends another cross-court backhand into Collins Street - CSN breaks back.

No recent TAO sightings.

Venus double faults to go 0-30 and is looking seriously stressed...

Two BPs for CSN!

and she gets the break!

As far as Venus is concerned, CSN must be singing 'it's getting to the point where I'm no fun anymore', but she ain't sorry!

WHOA at that x-court FH from CSN

CSN getting her first serves in and going for her shots. Impressive!

OMG two match points!

40-15. Venus lookin flat-footed and devoid of ideas.

She's done it!!!!

Venus gone!

Just did a search for the origin of "Lenny the Bruce" and found this little gem:

Oh, and while I'm attempting to make up 50% of all the posts on this thread on my ownsome - in what sense is the phenomenon of Lleyton Hewitt 2001-2 different to Jim Courier 1991-2? Similar counterpunching style, no apparent gift for net play, big flat serve, very aggressive. Perhaps Lleyton's status as untouchable winning machine will be similarly shortlived? In which case, Roger Federer 2003- = Pete Sampras 1993- ?

― Michael Jones, Friday, 5 July 2002 00:00 (6 years ago)

I don't want to blow my own trumpet and it does seem like a fairly obvious statement to make, but, hey, I was OTM! Doesn't happen very often.

Yay Carla!

Five games on the trot to come from 2-5 down. Great effort, the high point of the week so far.

She wasn't comfortable with the post-match guff, and we saw the Henin Effect. But at least Chris Dittmar knew when to pack it in.

I hope CSN forms a ladies doubles partnership with Yung-Jan Chan.

And while all that was going on, Gulbis came back from a two-set deficit against Andreev and is now a break up in the 5th...

Murray so far making short work of Crunchy Granollers....

Famous last w0rds....

Granollers breaks and at one stage wins 10 points in a row - it should at least wake the haggis-muncher up.

Lennie The Bruce was, I think, all my own work at about quarter past midnight this morning; however, I then got a bit worried cos I'm not sure exactly how Scottish Lennie really is, given that her hometown is listed as Enfield. The commentators were talking about her dividing her time between Roehampton and Ipswich, tho, so if it gets particularly dubious then The Ukrainian Tractor Girl might serve us well in future.

As for the game itself - not quite sure how great she was entirely, but she was definitely on top for that first set and chunks of the second, albeit that Mauresmo was moving her around the court a fair bit - clear signs that she can go a lot further than being world number 134 in the future, though, and I really hope she does.

(though when it hit me I was fairly sure it had been used somewhre else before too...)

I watched the end of that Venus game at the pub! It looked really boring but then some of those CSN backhands were mesmerising so I didn't go home and had to stay watching it. Marvellous!

She looks a bit like Napoleon Dynamite.

A double break in the second set courtesy of some fantastic serve-volleying put Murray firmly in charge

^serving and volleying breaks the other guy's serve, according to the BBC.

I hope CSN forms a ladies doubles partnership with Yung-Jan Chan.

Haw I get it!

i don't :(

ha me either :(

it appears federer-safin will be played early morning my time, so i won't be able to see it live :( :(

(it's to do with that country-rock from the 70s you love so well)

http://www.australianopen.com/en_AU/news/match_reports/2009-01-22/200901221232620653046.html

LOL at official site report not even knowing where their latest upset merchant comes from:

"Spain’s Carla Suarez Navarro has caused a major upset on day four of Australian Open 2009..."
but then..
"However, determined to fight till the end, the Argentine managed to break Williams’ serve and went on to lead the set 6-5 after a succession of great forehands."

FAIL.

Del Pony is so incredibly fine. His arms!

^^^^^^^^^^ this!!!

Kanepi vs Safina - well obviously if Kanepi and also Kanepi's humungous thighs won this Russia would shut off the gas, wouldn't they.

Petrova is, implausibly enough, playing someone called Voskoboeva, which amuses me because it looks like you could pronounce it Voskobeaver.

Emperor Vosko has retired injured, meaning Petrova's the first one through to the last 16.

The Djoker has beaten Delic in four tight and contra Jim Courier's assertion, not that entertaining sets. CAKE is a set down and a break up against Lucie SilvasSafarova. Breadstick vs Cornetto is going the way of the carbohydrate.

anyone whos watching espn2 want to tell me wtf just happened with the chair-throwing? i missed it

UPDATE: CAKE now in contrl against Safarova. Dear god is her WTA glamour shot appalling. Moi... Lolita up a break in the decider against the Coathanger. Weird Jel and Boom Crash Sugiyama on serve early.

anyone whos watching espn2 want to tell me wtf just happened with the chair-throwing? i missed it

Serbians and Bosnians threw chairs at each other (I think a Serb started it), some chick who they'd interviewed earlier got hit in the head, chairthrowing hooligans get tossed out, possibly arrested. Unfortunate, but not exactly shocking.

it was a magnificent throw, i gotta say.

That was a good night to go to sleep early, then! Happy for CAKE and ICE CREAM :D

The Djoker is losing sets to Delic now? Dear me. I've said this before, but it looks like the pressure of being defending champ is really getting to him.

WozDEN vs Dokic is pretty good so far. WozDEN is forcing Jelena to create all the pace, which she occasionally does to brilliant effect, but unsurprisingly this strategy has put Caroline *3-1 up...

re: the hooligans, isn't fighting over tennis the gayest thing possible? they should just make out instead.

Yeah it's a good game! WozDEN has a break but has been stretched on all her service games.

i really really hope safin beats the fed. unlikely, but you never know.

sort of half paying attention to wozniacki-dokic. wish ana's game was televised. berdych having a tough time of it first set.

Jelena has hit some fine winners, but you just know that whenever WozDEN floats that slow, loopy FH deep, Dokic will put it into the net.

The Ivanovic match is a potential upset...Kleybanova possesses some fucking ferocious groundstrokes. She's also obese, so if Ivanovic can get her moving around the court she should win, but Ivanovic has looked so hapless recently...

Dokic with BPs as WozDEN tries to serve the set out!

She missed all 3!

Ace to close from WozDEN!

Dokic 0-6 on BPs converted. Quelle surprise.

yeah, dokic seems to be playing well enough, but can't seem to grasp the crucial points

Just when I was wondering if calling Kleybanova obese was unnecessarily mean, Eurosport cut to her match. Bitch looks like a sack of goo. This is such a bad advert for women's tennis. How is it even possible to look like that if you're practising or playing every day.

Huge, huge strokes though. Like an early Davenport.

In the commentary booth - it's Alicia Molik! YAY! ANd the way she's talkinga bout Wozniacki, are we sure Leesh is straight? It's like when the male commentators get on a James Blake love-in here!

(huge Davenport joke missed)

Wow, Ivanovic can literally not serve any more. She's having to redo her ball toss on maybe half the points, and just got broken on a DF as she was serving for the set.

Molik is an Australian female tennis player, of course she's not straight.

(NB I actually have no idea but come on, surely Stubbs wouldn't have let that one get away)

OMG I just remembered Nicole Pratt. So glad she's retired.

wozniacki is looking pretty good on screen, i've gotta say. plus she looks to have an impressive game. one to keep an eye on (though this should go to 3 sets now)

haha. nicole (p)rat(t). she was always lucky if she could pull out a scrappy first round win.

and it would always be over one of my choking headcase Russians :(

Kleybanova with three set points!

well ultimately, it's the volatile players who are always the most fun to support due to the lack of predictability! much more entertaining than, say, supporting federer. :)

safin and haas for instance can be incredibly frustrating players to follow, but when they're hot they're scorching

hmmm... i do hope ana gets through. this slump has gone on way too long. but that bizarre ball toss thing is totally unencouraging

Dokic gets the break in the third set with a magnificent BH DTL! She's pumped up now!

woo-hooo!

*5-2! She'll serve for the match!

Jelena's back! That was inspired stuff in the last set.

Meanwhile, Kleybanova went up a double break, lost the lead, broke again, lost it again, and has broken again and will serve for the match...

jelena is sounding really gracious these days. she has matured a lot.

come on ana! what a topsy turvy match this one appears to be.

...and is broken. Obviously.

Ivanovic fist-pumping and squealing after the easiest overhead putaway in the world, and after Kleybanova's own chokey errors, was a bit WTF.

Pre-match interviews really are completely useless.

they're almost as painful as listening to johanna griggs stumble over every second line she speaks.

OK, here's the 2009 version of What Fred Did On His Holidays:

First up was Canas v Gonzalez. Gonzo was already looking pretty solid by the time I arrived, half way through set 2 and the match took no new twists afterwards. As a threat to the top echelon Canas looks throughly Canasta-ed and as he slid to straight sets defeat the most memorable thing about his game was a couple of impressive top-framing efforts, the best of which flew to somewhere near jet airliner altitude then missed the rather prominent Canas proboscis by millimetres on the way down.

Then came SBCE (that's Ancic, Lamps) v Ivo Karlovic, evenly matched in most facets including height (well over 13 feet between them) and they played what began as a tedious serve-slug-fest (first instance of the server needing to play a second shot came in the fifth game of the match) and ended as a classic five-setter in which the Anch came from 2-1 down to win. After Karlo won the first set with a single break (to love) I shifted my attention next door, to local Jessica Moore giving a great deal of first-set cheek to 12th seed Flavia Panatta. Unfortunately, by set 2 she had run out of cheek, and momentum, and court speed, and set 2 was a sad capitulation.

Then, after watching Nadal monstering the Age's designated 'nobody of the day' on the big screen, I caught the end of Tommy Haas sweeping aside Flavio Chippolata who had put out 29 seed Dmitri Tursanov on Tuesday. Haas's next entanglement is with one R. Nadal Esq. Next it was back to Anch & Karlo, as the latter was looking much the stronger, more versatile and more focussed but SBCE was fighting back and towards the end of set 4 he was getting right on top.

Now it was decision time. Sammy the Stoat was on the big screen by now, but after the exquisite frustration of Tuesday night I had sworn off her (after many years of swearing AT her). Or I might have sat tight and watched the climax of what was fast becoming an outstanding match. I did neither, instead wandering over to SC3 to watch Safin and Canas play doubles against Rob Smets (a first-round winner in 08) and somebody called Adam Feeney. I still have no idea why....suffice it to say Safin was deplorable: lazy, disinterested, at his petulant worst. At one stage he carried on a two-minute tirade at the central umpire over God-knows-what ruling. His partner had already played three sets earlier and it was possible that Safin was stacking on the attitude to give his partner a rest - except that it is unlikely Safin has the brains to form that intent. Eventually the two no-namee Aussies won with laughable ease and maybe Canasta now has an unwanted record: playing five sets on one day and losing the lot. As for Master Safin, God I hope Rodge TANS HIS HIDE!!!!

Caught a bit of Zonga v Looby Loo Ljubicic, then made the call that Inspector Blake v whoever was not nearly enticing enough a prospect to hang around for the evening session for, so I hit the road and watched the unfolding Villiams-CSN drama in the comfort of my own living room.

This was the first time I had gone in on Thursday instead of Friday and the difference between R2 and R3 was immense. The Safin debacle aside, it was OK but why not stick with Anch and Karlo???

another one bites the dust

I am a bad person! When Dokic lost the first set I thought "oh well" and thought I should go to the gym as I hadn't been. Then I was unable to get off the treadmill as it was right in front of a TV showing the game and I couldn't keep my eyes off it.

She'll ahve Kleybanova for breakfast. Kleybanova will have everything else...

Okay, Fed vs Saf. I don't like Safin's shirt and I wish he'd take if off. It's not a fantastic match, Rog has hit fewer errors, Safin has made some mad shots and some howlers and it's not that compelling. It is in a third set "breaker" so who knows.

zomg Safin, already one mini-break down, goes down TWO after double-faulting on a foot fault!

Brave linesman.

Safin up 5-4!

But no, Fed gets it. Game ended way better than it started on a delicious Fed backhand.

that was a strange TB to end it, with Safin going down 1-4 on the foot fault and seemingly about to implode - and then Fed just gifts him the next four points. and then of course gets it together with those big serves and that lovely BH pass.

I like Fed's shorter hair and the way his new T-shirt shows off his body really well :D

and you were right about the rest of it, which I only bothered half-watching - routine stuff as I expected. we're not getting another Fed/Safin 5-set classic in 09.

safin :(

haha there is still another match to go! but I cannot stand to watch Mardy Fish so who cares.

Safin didn't have a single break point, did he?

Now it's Baggy and the Fish...how late will this go, do we reckon? 3am local time?

He had some deuces but no, not a single BP.

Baggy's a set up, he'll cream Fish. ALso WTF at someone upthread saying he looks old now, he looked about 40 the year he got to the final!

:)

"The grey jumper is really in at the moment. Everybody has one. Grey is a great colour. I've got the belt going - with the RF on it so I remember who I am. Shoes have my initials on them as well. They've got three symbols on there for my three titles here."
Roger Federer talks fashion with on-court interviewer Jim Courier

and thanks for the on-the-spot reportage Fred!

I've got the belt going - with the RF on it so I remember who I am

Fed takes the same approach to fashion as Paris Hilton <3

suffice it to say Safin was deplorable: lazy, disinterested, at his petulant worst. At one stage he carried on a two-minute tirade at the central umpire over God-knows-what ruling. His partner had already played three sets earlier and it was possible that Safin was stacking on the attitude to give his partner a rest - except that it is unlikely Safin has the brains to form that intent. Eventually the two no-namee Aussies won with laughable ease and maybe Canasta now has an unwanted record: playing five sets on one day and losing the lot. As for Master Safin, God I hope Rodge TANS HIS HIDE!!!!

haha :) nice report. You have to wonder why Safin plays doubles, i mean it can't be the money, or true love of the game haha. (I like Safin though)

maybe Canas is the master of timing, asking Safin to play doubles when he's just had one of his angry fits (and says yes without paying attention before starting to demolish the place, while Canas seeks cover)

i'd say love of the game/practice. the dude doesnt have to be on the singles circuit if he doesnt want to either; he's plenty comfortable as it is

dude doesnt have to be on the singles circuit if he doesnt want to either; he's plenty comfortable as it is

yeah but you can play singles for Glory. even if you win 10 doubles Grand Slams, virtually no one will give a fuck. (But practice is a good call, it's good for rhytm i guess, even if in Safin's case he just gets in the rhytm of cursing at linesmen ;) )

CAKE is blogging this tournament and she is très charmant: http://www.sonyericssonwtatour.com/1/newsroom/stories/?ContentID=2896

Molik is an Australian female tennis player, of course she's not straight.

I distinctly remember reading some piece of scuttlebutt about her freaking out (in a bad way) when she realized just how many of her compatriots were lesbians, so I'm guessing no.

http://www.astsports.com.au/data/website/Image/Tennis/Australian%20Open%202007/Aust%20Open/Molik%20horiz%20for%20web.jpg

"It's the cast of 'The L Word'! Squeee!"

Molik is an Australian female tennis player, of course she's not straight.

i was trying to think of another female Australian tennis player, remembered Margaret Court, checked Wikipedia for the LGBT tag.. :) i won't quote the stuff she said about homosexuals here.

this one cracked me up though (nothing to do with Court, still mentioned on here page)
Damir Dokić's claim that he would kill himself if his high-profile professional tennis-playing daughter, Jelena, became a lesbian.[8]

those Eastern European fathers with their fears (father Krajicek comes to mind, also a big "fan" of Africans)

Murray 7-5, 5-0 without looking very good. I expected more from Melzer but his shot selection is all over the place.

Melzer finally wins a game after losing 11 on the spin.

without looking very good
I was maybe a little unkind there, I meant that he hasn't really been stretched - he has come up with some amazing shots. He's chasing down all sorts and making passes where he looks as if he'll lose points (very much like Nadal, and his court speed is maybe as quick). He's fought back from 15-40 and 0-40 and looks to be cutting down on the concentration lapses that gift his opponents the odd free break.

He's serving for the match now.

and right on cue he gifts his opponent a free break :)

7-5, 6-0, 6-2

Into the 4th round and he's hardly had any court time.

6-3 in the last set, sorry

Dementieva vs Stosur wasn't too bad!

srsly tho FUCK channel 7 - they're showing the foregone conclusion Nadal/Haas match when Gonzalez and Wussquet are at 10-10 in the fifth ffs!

Eurosport did that for ages so I had to watch on internet streaming! They have now seen sense though - this is such a great match. Wussquet just had a BP but Gonzo saved it with a monster FH...

Gonzo takes it, 12-10. Great match and no wussing out in the last set, but look at the scoreline and this is just going to go down as another Gasquet choke :(

I would like to know why BBCi are showing replays of the previous day's play at midnight rather than, y'know, live tennis. Exceptions being the Brits, obviously. It was nice to see the end of Fed v Saf and some of Molik's match last night but I knew the results.

It's a shame that two players, either of whom could've tested Nadal on this surface, have just played each other to a standstill. Gonzo's not going to have much left, is he?

There've been lots of complaints about this on the Beeb's liveblog - essentially, the answer seems to be that they can't afford it.

Or, as they put it:

"We are concentrating our efforts and resources on the Australian Open at the times, and with the matches, where we believe there will be most interest.

"So all Andy Murray's matches will be live on either BBC One or BBC Two, as well as 5 Live or 5 Live Sports Extra, and also streamed live on the BBC website. We are then also dedicating our resource on the night time session in Melbourne, as this coincides with the morning in the UK, where we feel there will be by far the most chance of a substantial number of viewers and listeners being able to access the coverage.

"Going through the night on the red button would incur considerable expense to bring the pictures from Australia, in return for a very small audience - and we do always need to make sure that we spend our money sensibly, to achieve the maximum return."

OK, I'm really surprised that Simon beat Ancic so easily! I mean, I guess I shouldn't be, and I probably would've expected that in any other event - it's just that this is the first time Simon has put it together at a Slam. Really want to see his 4R against Monfils. Actually, most of the 4R matches in both draws should be pretty good. Hyped for Del Pony/Anime Eyes tonight! And Weird Jelena/CAKE, of course.

Also: I'll take Baghdatis to upset the Djoker.

OH GOD, Bepa 3 has a 1-5 h2h vs Petrova...she really should win this anyway, but I fear the worst now.

those wanting live tennis should maybe look here:
http://www.channelsurfing.net/

I watched the end of the James Blake match on it this morning, not great quality but it works

CAKE takes a quick 3-0 lead with some fine BHs and a sweet lob! Jankovic is totally lacklustre.

LOL, Jankovic blew 40-0 leads in two consecutive games. 5-0 to Cake!

Cake misses her chance for a bagel, but wraps up a breadstick set efficiently.

Cake just played an incredible point to reach break point - incredible defense which she turned into offense just like that - and then on BP she virtually stood on the service line to receive JJ's second serve. Cue lame DF from JJ into the net.

channelsurfing.net is extraordinary! Six courts! Shame about the aspect ratio screw-up but you can't have everything.

Epic game at 4-4 there. JJ has stepped up her game slightly, but is still nowhere near her best, and is still there for the taking - Cake kept blowing BPs on unforced errani, though. Finally earned another one with a spectacular pass, and JJ couldn't keep with her...and Cake will serve for it.

how does she earn the name 'cake'?

great win btw, and nicely spoken in interview

CAKE!!!!!! :D

She was definitely tight at times in the second set, but she was NAILZ in serving it out, and it's always so good to watch her when she's zoning. Those inside-out FHs were like bullets.

Haw, in the interview she expresses disappointment that she didn't win the first set 6-0!

"I love cake. I really love chocolate cake."

^^oh, pudgy lil' Marion, this is your Achilles heel. except - no more! she has definitely slimmed down since last year...

ah there you go. i did suspect it was to do with her build. but you're right - she's definitely slimmed down a lot. now perhaps she can work on her posture a bit :)

aw nom nom cake! <3 :)

wtf @ this federer-berdych match

loll i love how they showed a graphic of "head to head tiebreak records" and they showed federer's as 4-1 and berdych's as 1-4.

O RLY

espn2 talkin abt here

rogr in trouble

dbl SP for birdman!

berdych up 2 sets to love!

some of those shots fed smacked wide during the second set were just mystifying.

i would bet my house (dont have a house) that fed wins this set at least 6-3

i'm awesome, i know

Drat damn & blast it, I need to get up "early" to deliver overdue stuff at comicbooklibrary tomorrow, but how can I leave this unseen?

oops

wtf is federer doing?! he's been a break up only to let berdych break back in the next game twice now.

rog started out doing his normal thing of 'how hard do i need to play to beat this guy', but he hasn't found that level yet. he can beat berdych, but he might not ramp up in time to do it.

and he lets berdych break back AGAIN!!!! asafsdf

omg volley

berdych is hitting some ridonkulous inside-out FHs

omg that overhead

WTF is this match????

fed FINALLY holds a break!

five breaks in 3rd set...its like a fucking womens match

btw obv serve out wide every time in ad box when serving from the near court...that shade line must be annoying as hell

ive always hated robredo just because i find his game so damn boring, but i actually kinda feel bad for him, watching him getting torn apart by roddick. he's got this pained look on his face, the look of a dude who's been a respectable player for a long time but has had a long, grinding, ultimately fruitless career. plus he looks old! the dude looks like he could be my dad.
so, he's above ljubicic/nalbandian/davydenko for me now

so many close calls and federer finally gets into the match after the end of fourth. now up 4-0 in the fifth.

lol, never in doubt.

And so I see Dokic is a set up...

Just remember, folks, "Bitch looks like a sack of goo." I thought they were hips and thighs, but no.

LOL & the Berdman collapse/Fed comeback.

ive always hated robredo just because i find his game so damn boring

ah, Boredo. I used to support him b/c he was pretty hott when he was younger, but those days are definitely behind us, and his nothing game can't keep me interested. Knew the Roddick match-up would be ugly. Seriously though, this tournament is getting really fun and it is time for Roddick to fuck off now. Let's hope the Baggy/Djoker winner can finish that off.

Safina/Cornet was...dramatic. Really dramatic. Cornet was *5-2 up in the third, and had match points at *5-4 40-15, but I didn't actually feel she choked that badly. For the second and third sets, Dinara was...just absolutely dreadful. Couldn't keep a ball in court. It was hilarious, total meltdown complete with trademark Safina distraught running commentary. The "highlight" was probably the drive volley into the stands. Cornet scampered endlessly and is a fine, creative shotmaker on occasion, but...at 2-5 down, Safina finally realised that Cornet couldn't hurt her. So she started aiming well inside the court, took some pace off the ball, stopped making retarded errors - cleaned up her game, basically, and was content to rally with Cornet. And Cornet just couldn't put her away. Even so, Safina was 1cm away from losing - Cornet's running FH DTL on her first match point juuuuuust missed. But it was a tough shot to make, so no choke there.

After the match, Cornet collapsed in her seat and was sobbing her heart out :( Poor kid.

Bepa 3 didn't fuck up the Petrova match! 3/18 on BPs converted though? Brr. Still, first Slam QF since 2003, unbelievably. Win it all, Bepa!

"Somebody needs to smack me so hard in my head that something finally shakes and I put the cables together"

I like this Safina quote!

holy moly Kleybanova is only 19.. :D

Kleybanova and Dokic are so evenly matched...every time one of them looks like getting in front, the other pegs her back, and it's as much about FIGHTING!!111 as CHOKING!!!!1111

Quietly rooting for Dokic to come through here, if only cos it means there's a tiny chance that one of the semis might be dubbed JD & Cake.

5-5 and I have no idea who'll win. Best believe Baghdatis and Djokovic are seething right now.

Sweet Jesus Jelena Dokic is in the quarter finals and I've possibly chosen the least appropriate match to watch with the sound off.

COURAGEOUS

HEART THE SIZE OF PHAR LAP

Oh good, 3.5 hrs of braindead commentators pronouncing Djokovic's name wrong. I'm going to bed.

Oh good, 3.5 hrs of braindead commentators
Or maybe an hour or so.

People actually started giggling for a bit during one rally of Monf-Simmo, simply cos Gilles couldn't help returning straight to the Pharoahe's backhand, and Monf was perfectly happy just to keep gently lofting it straight back onto his mate's forehand, over and over and over again... and I think Gael took the game cos eventually Gilles got distracted by some jets flying overhead. GM's just got the first break of the match (I think) and leads 3-2. It's quite a lot of fun thus far.

GS now leading 5-3 - tremendous point just then saw Monf sky one off his frame to such an extent that he literally gave up on the point and walked off before Simmo had even returned it. Simmo, of course, proceeded to hit his return to pretty much exactly where Gael had been standing :)

Gilles also appears to curse himself in very long and elaborate sentences... and writing that means I've missed Gael grabbing a break back with a lush drive down the line to go to 4-5.

Monfils and Simon are now taking a break to chat about the weather.

The sight of GM tipping a bottle of Evian all over his head perhaps suggests this might be quite a warm January afternoon. Both players just stopped then due to more sodding jets, I think - Gilles' English appears to be a bit better than Gael, and he complained about the number of them that had flown over. The umpire then asked the crowd: "Has anyone been keeping count?"

Simon broke back to take the first set 6-4, btw. Very good game, fast paced, swashbuckling, played in a very good-humoured manner too - Monfils has a marvellously endearing habit of scampering away after lost causes, getting to them and then whacking them out of play anyhow. Simon's not quite as spectacular, but he's very, very tidy.

Simon's not quite as spectacular, but he's very, very tidy.

A claim not entirely borne out by Simon leading the unforced errors count 23-17...

And by Monfils being 3-0 up in the second set thus far, with two breaks of serve.

In the other grown-ups match being played at present, everyone's favourite dark horse, CarliSuariVarri, is 6-3 4-2 up on AnnieMeddieGarrie, and the quarter-finals appear to be beckoning...

4-0 now, but feels a lot closer than the scoreline suggests. Switching to CSN-AMG.

This is the first time I've seen Simon - unbelievably, for someone who reached No 6 in the world at the end of last year. I've seen him referred derisively to as a pusher, and...I can definitely see why his success confounds people! I don't think I've ever seen a male pro player hit so softly. I must say, I didn't expect him to be quite so error-prone - apparently this is not usual for him - there are few things more frustrating than seeing a soft-hitting counterpuncher shed bunches of unforced errani for no reason, as if they were some kind of ball-basher.

Monfils' insistence on playing defensive, loopy crap is one of those things. Luckily, he seems to have stopped that for now, though Simon is digging his own grave rather.

Anyway, I like Simon a lot b/c he is a male A-Rad, and it amuses me that someone with Simon's style was one of only two players to beat all of the Big Three last year, and that he is 100% against Fed.

Oh, switch to - hopefully - CSN closing it out. Medina Garrigues is uncomfortably close to the top 20 for my liking. That must never happen.

For the one whole game that lasted, yes. Carla's through 6-3 6-2, albeit that the one whole game I got to see had her generally benefiting from AMG being terrible.

All Music Guide is always terrible.

CSN has now reached more Slam QFs in the past year than Ivanovic. Endless lols.

The weird atmosphere in the Simon/Monfils match reminds me of that MJF/Davenport match at Wimbledon, aeons ago, when they were BFFs. And the intra-Williams face-offs, come to that. Matches between friends, so awkward.

CSN has only played four Grand Slams in her career, and she's made the quarters in two of them. Then again, she's been pro for six years now...

She only started playing tennis when she was 9! That's kind of incredible.

Monfils levels the match, 6-2 second set. Too busy finding out that Dokic has accounted for the most seeds in the tournament thus far, taking out three on her route to the quarters, all in three sets OMG GAEL MONFILS IZ WEL BUF, fully expecting a final in which Jelignite takes on Cibulkova, who is subsequently revealed as The Wicked Witch Of The West.

CSN's start to her Tour career is strikingly similar to that of Marta Marrero - bizarrely, a fellow canaria - who also reached the QF as a qualifier at her debut Slam, RG, and followed that by making the 4R of her debut AO. Let's hope this isn't a harbinger of CSN's career! (Marrero's current ranking: 453.)

Have now been indulging in the sadly-neglected ILX pasttime of looking for amusingly named juniors (holy shit Monfils' baseline scrambling that last point was insane, obviously he lost it and now it's Simmo's turn to go a break up, 2-0 up in the set). Our leader thus far is (by a reasonable margin) Austria's Maximilian Neuchrist, unless James Duckworth's known as Jack to his mates.

Simon with the early break in the third, a terrific BH setting up a gorgeous touch volley.

Hey, CSN lost to Anne Keothavong two weeks ago.

The top half alone of the girls' draw gives us Quirine Lemoine, Bianca Swanepoel, Luksika Kumkhum, Linda Berlinecke and Kanyapat Narattana.

CSN has beaten Funky Cold Medina, appropriately, consituting further proof that music from the late 60s will always be better than the early 90s as a matter of definition....

While the Monf-Simon classic ongoes, both 7 and MerdTV have been showing a mens doubles match featuring Andres Seppi, Simon Bollelli and two other blokes I can't pick from the letters on the on-screen scoreboard (COL and SIR). (Colsir won the first set but are a break down in the second, in case anybody's interested.) Laughable!

Monf's retired due to dodgy wrist-itis. Le sigh.

(should obv have read "Everybody: Monfi gon")

Monfils retires thru injury three games into fourth set (TF for radio!) - now for Silliams v Azza.

Over to the Hisense (what does that even mean?), where Cibby's attempting to stay in the first set against Holy Shit When Did Dementieva Get So Ripped?

Demented just saved a break point with an ace.

I...just need to write that again.

Demented just saved a break point with an ace.

W. T. F.

Cibby can't hang on, 6-2 to Seriously, Those Are Like Boxer Arms Or Something, Maybe I've Just Not Seen Her Recently Or What, But I Remember Back When She Wasn't As Good As Myskina And She Looked Vaguely Elfin And Now Her Arms Are Like Carl Froch, Seriously.

Also, quite like Cibulkova's shirt.

Hisense manufacture home ent equipment. As I just learnt from Googling the name. The power of advertising.....

Inevitably it will become either 'Insense' or 'Nonsense' Stadium.

Demi 3-0 up now, and this really does not look close at all - Da Bulk just cannot hurt her at present.

5-0, Cibs' match summed up at 15-15 when she had the entirety of the court in front of her to dink a drop shot into, but found the net instead. One double fault later and she couldn't get to her chair fast enough...

And so, having written her off entirely, Cibulkova digs out a break to bring it back to 5-1 with a rocket of a forehand winner.

And that would be 5-2, to love, and everything. DC bossed that game start to finish, but still needs three more on the spin to even make things interesting.

sure this has been mentioned, but can i just say: fuck the bbc's coverage.

She couldnae, albeit that Diva was giving her a fair amount of helping hands by contriving to fluff two match points. Dementieva gets to face CSN next round, and will probably wind up losing to Serena in the semis.

No way! Serena's got a dud knee and looked awful last week and also also also she's losing to Azarenka, an obvious "Upset in the making", and I am getting really aggravated that despite having predicted it might happen, Tracey Austin is trying to explain HOW WHY the IMMORTAL WILLIAMS could be losing to some player you haven't heard of, as if to try to stop the people watching at home's heads from exploding at the SHOCK of a Williams losing.

Fuck you, Tracey! Your commentary is shit and your anecdotes about getting to the Xth round when you were only Y years old are tedious.

Still only the second best reason to have the sound muted! Williams/Azarenka's grunting is not THAT loud but the two different sounds juxtaposed are really unpleasant.

damn serena get yr shit together

she's up 3-1 in the 2nd.

Indeed - she's not holding serve comfortably though. I think Azarenka is going to win this, the same way I knew Dokic would win last night even when the scoreline didn't agree.

well so much for that.

well, lol.

murray looking very shaky in the second set. i don't think he can handle the heat.

It's not as hot today as some other days though!

yeah, which is why it's odd to see all these retirements!

a decisive 3rd set for murray. come on andy! i want to go to bed!

okay, nevermind. he's faltering again, and losing his temper too fast.

By contrast, Nadal through 3, 2 and 4 in barely an eyeblink. He looked seriously good.

what the fuck is this murray match

goddammit murray

FOR POSTERITY, Murray had a REALLY long game on Gonzo's serve where I thought he'd break but he didn't, and he then lost his serve and now appears down and out, down 3-5 and serving to stay in. I guess buffing up (and he still looks like a buff version of a boy I liked once who works in a bookshop but is taken grrrrrr, sorry digresing a bit).

Also, more Australian media lols: hyping up the Tsonga/Blake match by saying they are both "entertainers", sorry, male tennis commentators' endless asexual man love aside, Blake is incredibly boring and I don't know any big tennis fans who like him (NB I don't know any Americans who like tennis). LAME.

http://photos-c.ak.fbcdn.net/photos-ak-snc1/v2118/190/4/637939427/n637939427_1972402_7824.jpg

not the actualz open but close enough

also

Forecast for Tuesday
Sunny. Winds northeast to southeasterly averaging up to 20 km/h tending mainly
southeast to southwesterly around midday.
City Sunny. Min 15 Max 38

Forecast for Wednesday
Sunny. Winds northeast to northwesterly averaging up to 30 km/h tending mainly
southwesterly around midday.
City Sunny. Min 25 Max 41

Forecast for Thursday
Sunny. Winds northeasterly averaging up to 30 km/h tending mainly southwesterly
up to 40 km/h around midday.
City Sunny. Min 26 Max 40

Forecast for Friday
Sunny. Light winds.
City Sunny. Min 24 Max 40

Forecast for Saturday
Sunny. Light winds tending south to southwesterly up to 20 km/h during the
afternoon.
City Sunny. Min 24 Max 40

Forecast for Sunday
Cloudy. The chance of thunderstorms later in the day. Light winds.
City Cloudy. Min 23 Max 31

come on murray

And for the next week, Andy Murray is Scottish, out 6-4 in the fifth.

He will get a slam one day though.

with murray out, what will the bbc do??

Zonga (who still looks like Muhammad Ali) comfortably ahead of Sexton Blake (who still looks like a roll-on deodorant bottle as well as a right tosser).

LOL, wtf happened while i was sleeping!

you know, a clue should have been Verdasco's scorelines so far: 6-0 6-2 6-2 vs Mannarino, 6-1 6-2 6-2 vs Clement, 6-4 6-0 6-0 vs Stepanek. That is the sign of a man whose big FH is working this tournament. But this is a huge upset! He's never been one for beating top players, and Murray's handled him very easily before.

Zheng had to retire vs Sweta as well :(

at least Tsonga is winning :)

also, I like Murray a lot &c &c, but I'm also all for staving off the inevitable stupid hype which will ensue in the UK media when he does win his Slam. this is why he must never, ever win Wimbledon.

lol fireworks on telly + out the window

also, Demented has managed to draw me into her Web of Hope. This cannot end well :(

Hasn't she just. Starting off inauspiciously against gimps, playing into "form" again, good scoreline against tough opponent... this could easily end with losing her next very winnable match.

From 6-1, 5-1, 40-15 up.

Anyway! Flake blows a 5-3 third set lead, as is his wont, and Tsonga goes through. QFs now all set:

(16) Marion Bartoli v (7) Vera Zvonareva
(3) Dinara Safina v Jelena Dokic
Carla Suárez Navarro v (4) Elena Dementieva
(8) Svetlana Kuznetsova v (2) Serena Williams

(1) Rafael Nadal v (6) Gilles Simon
(14) Fernando Verdasco v (5) Jo-Wilfried Tsonga
(7) Andy Roddick v (3) Novak Djokovic
(8) Juan Martin Del Potro v (2) Roger Federer

Lex' pix:

Zvonareva d. Jankovic
Safina d. Wozniacki
V.Williams d. Cibulkova
S.Williams d. Radwanska

Nadal d. Ancic
Murray d. Gulbis
Nalbandian d. Djokovic
Federer d. Cilic

Blimey, only 6 out of 16 for the men's and women's qf! You're losing your touch.

Nice of Murray not to make me late for work this morning by ensuring that he folded from 3-3 in the 5th in the time it took to have breakfast and grab my keys/pass/wallet...

Djokovic up a set over A-Hole! GOOD!

Bepa into the semis! Eh, but it's making Lex happy so.. GOOD!

Courier's pronunciation of "Djokovic" continues to make babies cry.

The Australians pronounce it the way he does, though. Fucking montalbans.

im sure my moderate fandom will not make me popular here, but i dont really like the djoke at all. come on andy

moderate fandom *for roddick* will

number (1) (2) (3) and (5) in the men's semi-finals I expect
I don't see Roddick beating Djokovic right now

Sometimes I think to myslf that Roddick isn't THAT objectionable, but then when I hear the commentary which just assumes everyone watching himw ants him to win (Jim Courier, you're not in the US, please acclimatise) and it drives me mad.

But lo, he has a break.

the djoke looks like the tennis court is abt the last place he'd like to be right now

and who can fucking blame him. i played a clay court tournament last summer in ~100 degree heat and lost eight pounds in one match! 126 degrees or whatever this is fucking insane

.............
the on court temperature is 142 right now. (61 celsius). downright dangerous

What a rotten thing to wake up to. (Well, the 6:30am news actually said they were still playing...but clearly not for much longer). Didn't they close the roof? Aren't they supposed to do that for 35C+?

i dont think so. you could tell djokovic was pretty exhausted by the end of it

Dokic vs Safina is occasionally extraordinary, albeit marred by very poor serving. Safina up a set but down a break but Dokic has looked VERY shaky and seems tobe getting nearly no first ones in.

Safina has broken back and is serving to level and stay in the set. Her serve is slightly more convincing ATM and Jelena is looking a bit tired.

Yes, as I was saying.....

Dinara gifts her the set with a double fault. 1-1.

Go hard or go home Jokerman! :)

Dokic continues to hang on like grim death, holds after an almighty struggle after losing first two games of third.

She's outhitting Safina. She's just not serving very well.

wau REALLY shit line-call there.

It's really easy to warm to Dokic watching her play, even though her eyes are scary.

BEPA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

BEPA IN A SLAM SEMI-FINAL :D

*ignores the other gross result*

Really, Safina and Dokic are at 4-4, and all I want is for the winner to tire herself sufficiently to be easy pickings for Bepa.

That will happen.

Some dubious shot selection there.

OMG, can you IMAGINE a Bepa/Demented Slam final. That would be amazing. Both a) because they are my favourite active players, and b) because they are both crazy headcase bitches are the assorted meltdowns would be formidable.

*and

Safina breaks. She shouldn't have, mind you. Bepa will eat her alive.

OMG a female actually manages to serve out a match.

lol the dream is over

Hooray Dinara!

ZVONAREVA, Vera (RUS) Versus Dinara SAFINA (RUS)

Year Tournament Round Surface Winner Score

2002 Sopot SF Clay (O) D.SAFINA 3-6 2-6
2004 Rome 32 Clay (O) V.ZVONAREVA 1-6 6-4 6-2
2006 Charleston 32 Clay (O) D.SAFINA 5-7 5-7
2006 French Open 128 Clay (O) D.SAFINA 3-6 5-7
2007 Charleston SF Clay (O) D.SAFINA 3-6 1-0 RET
2007 Moscow QF Hard (I) D.SAFINA 2-6 6-3 3-6
2008 Doha 16 Hard (O) V.ZVONAREVA 7-5 6-3
2008 Miami QF Hard (O) V.ZVONAREVA 7-5 6-4
2008 Moscow SF Hard (I) V.ZVONAREVA 6-2 7-6(5)

Dinara SAFINA (RUS) Leads Vera ZVONAREVA (RUS) : 5 to 4 *

OK, so excluding the retirement, that's a dead even h2h. and Bepa won all three matches last year - though two came before Safina transformed into an elite player (at Berlin), and by Moscow, Safina was pretty fatigued from her long season. Still, I think Bepa should take this...as long as she doesn't melt down :/

i am rooting for Vera, though she's looks more beautiful when's she angry/losing.

by the way, the players have often complained that Australian Open starts too early in the season, would it be less hot if the tournament would be held 2,3,4 weeks later?

No. Melbourne weather isn't that predictable. Next year it could rain all tournament.

ah, ok.

LOL at people who thought Federer might lose this one!

Let's hope Federer hasn't peaked a round early here; it's an awesome display so far.

Delpy has given up. It's looking like three-oh-oh.

13 straight games. That's fearsome.

the match-ups today were total flops except for safina-dokic.

i haven't seen much of del potro this tournament, but on the back of tonight's display i'm amazed he got so far. i guess the wheels really came off once he lost his first service game of the second set though.

so i was there in rod laver tonight - safina-dokic was a lot of fun even if i was pretty much surrounded by oi-oi-oi types all night. but then i expected that anyway plus she's very easy to root for. both players were serving atrociously though. and a bit surprised to find that safina hits the ball much harder than it looks on tv - her FH is this big echo-ey thump.

i <3 Fed but the PotRoast pummeling afterwards was majorly depressing in comparison.

wow, didn't expect Del Pony to be too much trouble for Fed - still too one-dimensional - but didn't expect quite this beatdown. was Fed in God mode, or was it Del Pony being hapless? only saw the first set, which was neither, just routine.

It was a bit of both - DP got very sloppy after the second break in set 2, but we did get some sparkly all-court stuff from Rodge. Half-volley winners from the baseline, that sort of thing.

(This is based on the 10 or 12 points I actually saw live, plus the end-of-set highlights reels; I had it hidden and muted most of the time...)

a little bit of both - Fed was nailing every shot he missed in the Berdych match including some astounding drop shots I haven't seen him pull off in ages, while Del Potro didn't even look like he was trying to fight back. he was pretty much despondent already halfway through the second set. xp

Let's hope the same thing happens to Roddick tomorrow! :D

Also, I think Fed will win now...I just feel that Nadal will be tripped up before the final. Either Simon or Tsonga could do it.

also, a moment destined to be repeated over and over again for the next few days, when del potro missed another backhand causing the ball to bounce twice and fed, already confident of winning, headbutts the ball back over the net. no footage on youtube yet.

xp dunno about that lex, Nadal was looking pretty intimidating yesterday. we'll see. pulling for Fed to match Sampras now tho.

Federer, who later crushed Juan Martin del Potro to book a semi-final against Roddick, said he was not surprised to see Djokovic pull out.

"It's happened before. It's not the guy that's never given up in his career," said the 13-times Grand Slam champion.

"It's disappointing to see when you have two top guys playing each other and you give up.

"He gave up against me in Monaco last year because of a sore throat so those are kind of things you wonder about.

Roger Federer, SUPERBITCH! He's right though, and it seems a bit uncouth of Djokovic to pull out and get all the cheers when he could've just stood still for a few games. But then I'm always glad to find more reasons to justify my initially unjustified dislike of him.

^^Federer-ex delivers Truth Bomb!

Djokavic is a total wuss.

I like Djokovic but I'm SO GLAD Fed dropped that truth bomb.

I really wish someone would do something similar to the entire WTA. It's a joke at the moment, but I was thinking of what it would've been like had the Williamses and the Belgians displayed the commitment and focus of Federer and Nadal over the past five years. It wouldn't just be their own records which would have been bolstered, I think the entire Tour would have benefited. Just look at how the standard set by Roger and Rafa forced Murray and Djokovic to raise their games that high. And in turn, how up and comers like Tsonga, Del Potro et al will also be forced to do this.

Whereas the women who could have done this...one prefers to be lazy, show up out of shape half the time (or just not show up at all b/c she's made it abundantly clear how much tennis bores her) and fritter away her talents. And the other retired mid-career because who even cares about the sport. And yet another retired to have babies. And now "having a life outside of tennis" supersedes playing the sport, and we have a joke No 1, and there's been maybe one decent Slam final in half a decade, and every second hyped-up match is an avalanche of unforced errors and choking, and it's going to get worse before it gets better.

Lena predictably owning the bluesy trio of CSN. GO ELENA!

CSN hasn't played badly, but Demented is still up 6-2, 5-1. That's really impressive. She's won all the potentially match-turning multi-deuce games. Almost as if she has the mentality of a CHAMPION!

Why do I get my hopes up like this.

Because you're like the wife of an alcoholic! Returning despite all the shoddy treatment.

I didn't just see Henri Laconte singing a bit of "Lady Marmalade" to some fuckwit interviewer did I? Oh god, yes, I did.

i dont see why anyone would be a dementieva fan

oh god this Silliams/Kuznetsova game is SO DIRE.

x-post because she is amazing.

ok /troll but she strikes me as kinda boring, not as hot as people make her out to be, and ohmygod that serve. i just can't ever see myself pulling for someone with that kind of glaring deficiency in her game

Silliams is pathetic. Sweta is useless. This is one of the worst sets of pro tennis I have ever seen. How is it possible for either of them not to put the other away in this form?

Oh, now we await the unforced error stats with trepidation.

Demented is completely amazing. Her serve is even good now.

Sveta gets it. DEAR GOD, it is not quite the worst game I've ever seen (I never saw the game Silliams lost to Craybas but surely it was worse) but it's awful.

Like, a third of all the points Diva lost in her game were DFs. She's hella good off the ground, an awesome mover, her game is interesting and flexible and... she's nuts :(

12 winners for Sweta, 4 for Silliams.

18 UEs each. It feels like a lot more.

Apparently Sweta made 68 UEs in her third round match. And she WON. I...that is just hideous.

When Demented is on, her game is explosive and thrilling. And she has really adorable on-court mannerisms. And I have always been attracted to insane choking headcases :( My first ever favourite player was Novotna, after all :(

oh my favorite players are headcases too! safin and gasquet are my top two. i've really just never gotten that into the women's game, unfortunately; i enjoy watching the williams sisters play, and i'll watch sharapova or ivanovic play just because they're gorgeous, but i really can't stand the WTA as a whole for all of the reasons you so nicley outlined upthread, lex. and moreover i can't bring myself to root for 90% of the young russian women, the majority of whom to me play the same game and are woefully non-charismatic

i was at that third round match - it was fucking terrible. sweta committed 40+ unforced errors in the first set alone but bondarenko was just hopeless all over. xxp

historically I've always been more into the WTA cuz I first started obsessively following tennis in the late 90s. The women had a really strong old guard (Graf, Novotna, Seles) and it was the era when Hingis, Kournikova, the Williamses and Lucic were all coming up. So many great storylines and rivalries, and brilliant tennis from most too.

Whereas the ATP was severely hampered by surface specialists and high-ranked players who'd lose in the early rounds all the time, and the one consistently good player being Sampras (UGH). Honestly, what I might appreciate best about the current men's elite is that they can all go deep on clay AND grass AND hard, the attitude of male pros in the late 90s to different surfaces was pathetic.

So it's cyclical, the WTA was pretty enjoyable until about 2005 I guess? when everything just fell into disarray and none of the elite players worked hard enough to regain their form. Fed's God years were boringly predictable BUT aesthetically pleasing enough to make up for that, and they set up all the compelling narratives which the ATP is currently enjoying. The WTA could really do with a Federer/Nadal figure but really I'd just take players who don't melt down when asked to serve out a set, or commit 9483034743304 UEs per match.

Sveta seems to be narked that they've invoked the extreme heat rule and shut the roof.

ha, ok perspective certainly helps! i'm 19, so when i started following tennis regularly, the women's game was already in a primitive form of the joke it is now. the williamses were exciting, young players who played huge, interesting games, so i liked them, but that was about it. i've always been super partial to americans (obviously), but i loved sampras for a multitude of reasons, one of which was his serve-and-volley game (which I often employ when I play seriously).

xp

I liked Sampras! This is not a popular thing to say but I did.

I don't hate Americans at all, but I always hate the assumption my commentators that EVERYONE wants Roddick to win, or Americans who are boring (Blake) or just downright appalling (Taylor Dent ffs). I like Venus plenty these days, too.

ha see, i like dent too, for the same reason i used to like henman! i'm partial to serve-and-volleyers

i agree blake (good lord, i just typoed that as "black" :-/) is boring though. i still root for him occasionally, but if he's playing anyone marginally more interesting, i won't.

Oh god Svetlana you are fucking hopeless!

Oh god, Blake and Henman are right down in my vision of hell.

Is there a player more useless than Sweta. Hideous errors and a tentative volley into the tramlines to give up the game, when serving for the match. I don't know why she didn't just concede it straight off.

lex, isnt it like 4am where you are?

I don't think there are that many Anglo players I've liked...the US/UK/Aus national style (either serve-volleying or uber-aggressive ball-bashing) doesn't appeal at all. I did like Agassi, but the St Andre hype in his last few years got on my nerves. I liked Lori McNeil, but she was slightly before my time.

yes it is! i have a 10am deadline. i've been staying up til 3-4am most nights for the AO anyway.

good god, kuznetsova is just lying down at this point

Sweta. Why even bother.

henceforth 'sweta' then. what's the nickname from?

Russian diminutive of Svetlana = Sveta. And she sweats a lot.

lol ok works for me.

aaand silliams holds at love. no way sweta gets more than three games this set

Our final set options:

a) Sweta FIGHTS to a *5-3 lead, then CHOKES to a 5-7 loss;
b) Silliams 6-0.

Prob not! Two doubles in a row.

x-post!

ooh nice I-O BH dtl!
and the cheap point! still say serena takes it easy tho

What the fuck was THAT?

the hell was that.

ha xp

I think it was one of those unforced error things. Not that we've seen many of those!

This really underscores the point Lex made above, doesn't it? Henin would NOT have let this happen over and over and over again as all the chokey women do.

lol @ the review

wtf was that volley.

I mean, sure Silliams is good, but she's made to look even better DESPITE her appalling inconsistency just because everyone ever is a flake. She can count on her opponents turning to jelly.

Like going into the net and then turning into a retard (at the same time as turning into jelly).

Whatever, Sweta. You've got a break point and you do nothing.

Hey, we get to see Demented do exactly the same thing in the next round.

This is just embarrassing. I don't even LIKE kuznetsova that much, she's well to the back of the pack of Russians in my affections but... seriously, just go home.

The Little Melbourne Paper For Stupid People ran a shitty little story about a sum of money the Dokic family owes to some bloke who's a drug dealer, and worse, a Good Mate Of Ben Cousins. Showing again exactly what a warm, generous-spirited institution it is.

man simon is playing well but just can't seem to do anything against rafa right now.

yeah i am getting so bored of this Nadal right now. Simon can't beat him, Verdasco will NEVER NEVER beat him. so it has to be Fed again..

Simon's hitting loads of winners but just can't seem to turn anything into a lead. Rafa's passing shot to go 0-40 at 5-5 in the 2nd set was a thing of beauty. Rafa doesn't look quite at his best - he's more comfortable in the unbearable heat, I think.

simon changing his game up a bit and is now a break up in the third. still think rafa's gonna take it but this is the most impressive display against him so far in this whole tournament.

whoops no he wasn't up a break - i need to stop watching matches and doing 1313143 things at the same time. he IS playing well though but now rafa is up a break.

as expected rafa into the semis. in other news, it is 37 degrees here in melb at 10.30 pm, fuck.

bah, this means no interesting men's SFs. whatever magic Naked Fernando's done in the off season is surely not good enough to take him past Rafa.

(nsfw obv)

I was gonna post those photos!

So at 11am it's a solid 38 degC, heading for another 43 degC today. Tournament officials have decided to close the roof at RLA...

'Lena vs 'Rena is on! ELENA IS GOING TO WIN... unless she chokes. But she won't.

Ugh, Tracey Austin going on about how when Serena gets on a roll she's hard to stop. This might eb true, but let's not kid ourselves, she WAS NOT ON A ROLL against Kuznetsova, Serena played crap too. Svetlana just went eep eep eep and turned into a pumpkin.

Srsly fuck it all.

Oh Lena :( I love you but please try to get your serve in more and DO NOT TRY TO DROP-SHOT SERENA WILLIAMS.

Or if you do try, maybe make sure the dropshot lands in court at least.

This is a good match! I want them both to play better, though.

ooh like this last point Serena hit, wau

The last break point Dementieva saved was AMAZING.
And her backhand to WIN the break in the second - mwah.

Just wish she'd serve better.. yeah.

idk, there are great points here and there but mostly I'm just seeing Serena hit hideous errors and Elena doing nothing but hit the ball back to her. Serena is serving pretty well, which I assume will make the difference in the end. I don't think Elena is serving that badly! You know, for her.

ANy time you hit two doubles in a row - EVER - you are not serving well.

She won that game! And she's hit some good serves under pressure. And you know it's been so much worse.

FUCKING HELL that was an amazing angle cross-courty rally! SO GOOD!

OMG an actual amazing point!!

Followed by a DF.

Followed by two double faults. Oh ffs.

No, two DFs to give the break back.

Dear Elena,

You can also hit balls down the line sometimes.

Love,
Everyone watching this game wondering why you keep hitting it back at Serena.

Well I have no idea if it's the occasion or what, but Elena Dementieva has been reduced to a brainless, tacticless ball-basher who doesn't even seem to think about what she's doing.

Grand slam champions don't play so vacantly. Really Elena if you showed half as much passion and evaluation during the points as you do after you fuck up, maybe you'd deserve it.

You can't blame Serena for being lazy and unmotivated, really. I mean, who cares if you hit 944738339 UEs per match, if this is your opposition. Serena knows that she will always, always be able to play the big points well, with aces and such. And for Elena...it is the opposite.

OK, next! Bepa for a Slam final! If I fucked up my sleep pattern for that, I may as well go all the way.

yeah i am getting so bored of this Nadal right now. Simon can't beat him, Verdasco will NEVER NEVER beat him. so it has to be Fed again..

― Ludo, Wednesday, January 28, 2009 10:30 AM (Yesterday)

Did you ever get bored of Fed when he was always on top?
Nadal all the way baby - the magic ain't worn off yet (but maybe he will eventually have to pull a Tiger before people start to respect his mad skillz again)

Ok the ESPN commentator just compared Dementieva's reoccurring double faulting to herpes. "No matter how hard you try to get rid of it, it always comes back at the worst possible time. I'm not speaking from experience, of course."

lol less than half an hour in and Federer's already two breaks up.

Did you ever get bored of Fed when he was always on top?

nope! i know it's unfair to Nadal, he can't help it he's so good.

Turned on the BBC video thing - first thing I spot is "First set stats: Roddick 76% 1st serve". Oh no, he's serving out of a tree - it's going to be one of those days... but hang on..."Federer: 2/4 break points converted". 6-2, blimey.

Roddick did just blitz his way out of 15/40 in the first game of set two but hopefully that's just delaying the inevitable. Nothing jangles the nerves like RF v AR, though. I've been through enough recently with all these sodding Merseyside derbies.

Roddick continues to serve very, very well. All we need here is a dip in his 1st-serve percentage and Fed will go through him like a dose of salts, but it's not happening just yet. I fear the breaker.

Bepa lost :( I wonder what kind of lead she blew in the second set. My two favourite active players in the SF, but once there I go 0 for 2...

Federer's doing that thing where he relaxes and doesn't particularly press Roddick too hard, b/c he knows Roddick can't hurt him, hence the score being respectable. Always frustrates me in their matches, b/c I'm always cheering for Fed to triple bagel him.

Here we are, inevitably stepped it up at 5-5. Fed with 0-40 on the Roddick serve.

Break to love! Now, let's lose no more games.

hahaha a rare occurrence: hawkeye likes fed tonight.

Fed serving for it. (Roddick has hustled very successfully in this set though - much more in the game).

6-2 7-5 7-5. 16-2 H2H. Fed's 18th Slam final (one behind Lendl now, I think).

Why is there an old man dressed in surf gear running around the cou...oh wait, it's just Pat Cash.

I had somehow confused Andy Roddick with Andy Dick. Now I understand tennis.

Verdasco takes the first set in extraordinary circumstances - a net cord takes a clearly wayward backhand of his and drops it dead on the line for 6-4 in the t/b. He gives Nadal the runaround on the next point and pops away an easy volley. Game on, I think.

SPOILER: Federer will win the men's and wossname will win the women's

I was wondering whether Verdasco would take the first or third as his token set. Watch Rafa grind him away now! If it goes to a fifth I'll pay attention...

this is an amazing match!

and nadal takes the third set in another tie-breaker. this match is taking forever.

i am watching it now and omg you are right, it is incredible. rafa's defence in the rally to win his serve at *3-4 was nuts. and the verdasco dropshot just now was just O_O

Totally awesome set of two games there at 3-4 then 4-4. Dead on Lex, incredible dropshot, and the point where Nadal had like 3 incredible saves then a winner was great too.

I should add that I have to go to work after this set regardless so I hope Nadal wins

four hours plus in and verdasco has only served his first double fault. O_O

what's that weird chewing thing verdasco keeps doing? it looks like he's chewing gum, but surely not during points. or on ecstasy, lol.

lol i think it's gum.

aaand we're into our third tie-break!

O_O at that first point

holy. shit.

OOO_OOO

verdasco was FYAH in that TB

omg.