The articulate Vice President Joe Biden thread

And it's off to the races with Jill Biden... SHHHHHHHH!

http://blogs.abcnews.com/politicalpunch/2009/01/jill-biden-tell.html

During the taping of the Oprah Winfrey show today, Dr. Jill Biden said that her husband, the vice president-elect, was given a choice of being either vice president or secretary of state....

Elizabeth Alexander, spokesperson for the vice president-elect, writes: "To be clear, President-elect Obama offered Vice President-elect Biden one job only -- to be his running mate. And the Vice President-elect was thrilled to accept the offer."

Haha, I was going to start this very thread on him today.

To be fair, that's more of a Dr. Jill Biden snafu. Also, at least Biden gives off a sincere vibe and not one a malevolent, sinister vibe like our former Veep.

the Vice President-elect was thrilled to contradict his truth-spouting wife

sincerely oily

Do Dennis Perrin or Bruce Cockburn have anything interesting to say about this?

haha Bruce Cockburn

"If I had a rocket launcher / No flight back to Crawford"

Haha, well I already knew Alexander Cockburn didn't have anything interesting to say.

and since YOU ASKED!

God, I hate inaugurations -- a massive commercial for the imperial state, with some "populist" tinsel tossed around to make consumers feel included. And like clockwork, media mouthpieces assure us that no other country on the face of the planet, perhaps in all of history, transfers power so peacefully, so democratically. As if every other nation shuffles leaders via summary executions in windowless basements. Inaugurations show us, full blast, how arrogant and insecure our owners remain, thus the relentless propaganda about American "uniqueness." It's nauseating to witness, but it works.

"Think the rubes bought it?"

"They better. This thing's costing a fortune!"

http://dennisperrin.blogspot.com/2009/01/o-nauguration.html

As if every other nation shuffles leaders via summary executions in windowless basements.

The dark side of Canada REVEALED.

what a retard

he's got the refreshing cynicism of a 14-year-old goth

whereas ppl who think Bam is a liberal actually are 14 years old

this is gonna be the longest thread ever

> sincerely oily

Don't forge my signature!

I really am with Morbius on at least a fair amount of stuff, but quoting Dennis Perrin makes me think he's the Alex in NYC of politics.

yes let's please have this interesting discussion about the views of dr morbius again

Not all of Perrin's views are mine.

was anyone else surprised that Justice Stevens didn't hand Biden his robe and say "I quit" the second the VP oath was done?

no

I was wondering about that. Too bad they couldn't have asked Alito!

Stevens just has to be relieved he doesn't have to survive to 105 now

Scalito's Way

Perrin is a fucking idiot.

In case that wasn't clearly established already.

I'll get back to you in 100 days

Watched Mr. Biden talk to Oprah last night. He continues to be unpleasant.

You can expect anything pleasant to come out of watching Oprah.

Inaugurations show us, full blast, how arrogant and insecure our owners remain, thus the relentless propaganda about American "uniqueness."

America is unique for a number of fairly significant reasons (biggest, most successful, longest-running experiment in representative democracy, for one)

let me know when that democracy arrives, Mo

- Leonard Cohen

I'll get back to you in 100 days

can't wait

or never, you sheep.

Wake up, sheeple!

tbh the whole style of the inauguration is pretty grotesque - did have some great moments in spite of that tho

sheep-shaped cloud

http://my2bucks.files.wordpress.com/2008/06/oldmanyellsat-cloud.jpg

http://images.salon.com/ent/movies/review/2008/12/12/gran_torino/story.jpg

lol

sweet belt, clint

morbs this is weirdly gross even for your "everyone is the same" style? i dunno something about this thread is really vomity to me.

I wonder, Morbs, what contemporary governments we should looks to for pointers? Governments of large, world-leading, heavily-armed countries, I mean. Or even historically. Where do we find the morally unblemished examples of representative government in action that should inspire us? Not, mind you, in small bystander nations that have few concerns outside the tending of local pea-patches, but among the "superpowers" of this or that era.

I'm trolling, kinda, not cuz I don't think any such examples exist, but cuz I'm not really trying to defend what America gets wrong. The lack of a better example does not forgive us our faults. But the snarling, embittered, wounded-idealist schtick gets kind mystifying when it issues from the mouth of someone over, say, 35 years old (not that I presume to know your age). I mean, when one knows a bit of history and has had the opportunity to observe the human animal at work for a few decades, it seems to me that one more-or-less naturally comes to understand why the application of power falls so consistently short of its nobly stated ideals. I.e., the "failure" comes to seem less like hypocrisy and more like the gap that always stands between ambitions and acheivements, even when one is most successful -- and especially when action necessarily involves the cooperation of many individuals with wildly differing agendas, some much more powerful than others.

To understand is not to forgive, necessarily, but it does tend to temper judgement. Evil must be opposed, of course, but examined fairly, the action of the American government consists of a myriad sub-actions, some more evil and some more good. The trick is to work practically & pragmatically with the good to minimize the evil -- not to simplistically insist that the whole enterprise is worthless until all evil is expunged.

The thread in and of itself is unobjectionable, lord knows we're gonna need a rolling lolling Biden thread for at least 4 years

xpost

ya rly

schef, I think of it more as "every pol is not different enough."

apparently I'm not the only one who's creeped out by the new Veep even tho NO HE IS NOT CHENEY.

contenderizer, i'm tryin real hard to think of net good accomplished by the American government since Jan 1981. (and yes I voted in '80)

let me know when that democracy arrives, Mo

Democracy is relative. America is a republic but even so it is more democratic than every other republic/democracy that preceded it.

Americans are pissy enough about participating in a republic, imagine if they actually had to vote on everything!

every pol is sacred, every pol is good

Morbius, doesn't keeping millions and millions of less-well-to-do citizens (and non-citizens) fed and clothed and housed count for something? And what about countless international aid efforts? And what about bridge-building with China, regarless of the motives? And how about the slow move towards the legal validation of gay people and gay relationships? And how about Clinton-era movement towards environmental protection? Net good is subjective, I'm a progressive, and this country has been under conservative control for 20 of the last 28 years (and Clinton's administration was only nominally liberal). This means that I mostly agree with you. My vision of "the good" has been squashed by someone else's. But that doesn't justify ALL IS SHIT AND AMERICA SUCKS or some other equivalently peeved/simplistic sandwich-board sloganeering.

Over the course of its history, America has accomplished good and done evil, as most nations do, great or small. In a very broad sense, I'd say that we are now a wiser and in some ways morally "better nation" than we have been for most of our history (Dubya years notwithstanding, of course).

the steps backward in this country are fewer than the steps forward, but they tend to be louder.

dude this is a thread about biden saying dumb shit, lighten up xpost

better in many ways, worse in many, need to Rise Above.

I'm sure we share the same basic wishes and goals for our nation and world, 'tender, but 28 years of Reaganism is enough (omar -- no, backwards for 3 decades); it's chucked many powerless citizens by the wayside. I hope we see a real course change, but given the entrenchment of institutional monied interests, I'm waiting but not expectant.

Wait. Why are we telling someone calling Morbs out on his tedious bullshit to stop?

man a reunited black flag doing "rise above" woulda been sweet at the inauguration

LUGOSI: Tedious, perhaps. Bullshit...?

Alito ref was to how he's still miffed at Dems for voting against him, by the way.

Obama has warned he's walking kind of a middle path. Not as bad as Clinton, it seems.

which is why it's up to us to tell him what we think. and ignore pretty much everything Biden says.

guys, Biden exists as a laff magnet; that way no can laugh at Obama.

it's gone unmentioned, of course, that president obama doesn't hold grudges over biden's remark about him to which this thread oh-so-cleverly alludes. i wonder why morbz doesn't?!?

i'm not exactly a biden fan, either -- but why couldn't we wait till the guy actually does/says something dumb and/or offensive?!?

i think the vp should be daffy, our non-daffy vp's have been menaces. gore had a hint of daffiness about him, so did ghwb i guess. ford's daffiness was an invention, people just wanted to have it back.

spiro agnew was daffy AND menacing, though

Alben Barkley wasn't daffy – he was old.

Isn't JB's problem that he's overly honest? Most of his "gaffes" result from a lack of brain to mouth control. That's sort of different than saying he possibly wouldn't meet with the prime minister of Spain or whatever.

Why can't all of you unbelievable goddamned morons go fuck yourselves to death with a rusty piece of rebar

http://ta-nehisicoates.theatlantic.com/archives/2008/12/open_nfl_thread_3.php

I'm never shocked by trolls. I'm always shocked by the people who take the bait.

Just hit Suggest Ban and walk away. Imbeciles.

cheezit, it's the Permanent Government!

it's everyone's second-favorite politics thread troll!

Just speaking truth to Zero Power koolaid drinkers, babe

yes, that is what you do.

http://fourfour.typepad.com/.a/6a00d83451b8c369e2010536ac0706970c-800wi

http://img516.imageshack.us/img516/2895/obamazf8.gif

jeez you'd think lj had started this thread or something are yall that bhurt

ITEM: Vice President Joe Biden has a new assignment: overseeing US policy on Iraq

Press Secretary Robert Gibbs confirmed Tuesday that President Obama had asked Biden to begin 'working with General [Raymond] Odierno and Ambassador [Christopher] Hill in working with the Iraqis toward overcoming their political differences and achieving the type of reconciliation that we all understand has yet to fully take place.'

"Couldn't happen to a sicker fuck.

Let's briefly review Joe Biden's take on Iraq.

First, he supported Bush's "enforcement strike," as Biden put it in 2002, talking out of both sides of his ass, authorizing the invasion while worried that, over time, it might not be as successful as he would like. Sort of like John Wayne Gacy being concerned that he might run short of crawl space to stuff bodies into. How embarrassing is that?

Once the killing commenced and all hell broke loose, Biden called for a partition of Iraq, which was already happening under the more common name of ethnic cleansing. As with any viceroy wannabe, Biden had his own concept about how the natives should be arranged, minus their direct input, of course. Again, it was all about "our" needs.

Then Biden, double-talking as usual, criticized the political side of "the surge" while championing its military aspect. So although he was fine with more Iraqi dead, Biden bitched that we were pouring money down the drain, undermining our violence in Afghanistan. "It's killing us," cried Biden on the Today show...."

http://dennisperrin.blogspot.com/2009/07/abu-biden.html

I love the first half of this thread.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=afVr0Bf7_Fg

Apparently the Republican troll who assembled this did enough damage to his spelling.

http://i41.tinypic.com/2euiykh.png

:-O!!

Soldier on the left just had a red idea

http://www.talkingpointsmemo.com/images/gallery-joebidenshow18.jpg

i gotta say, biden bowing to jon stewart was kinda shrewd & pretty hilarious

thats awesome

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=no0e-mkhhbs

how long has it been since Stewart interviewed two cretins as vile as Biden and Lou Dobbs on consecutive nights?

Biden isn't a cretin.

No, he IS a cretin, but most of our veeps have been, and I'll take a cretin over Dick Cheney.

lowered expecretins.

• Joe Biden
• Dick Cheney
• Al Gore
• Dan Quayle
• George H.W. Bush
• Walter Mondale
• Nelson A. Rockefeller
• Gerald Ford

king of the shits?

http://30fps.mocksession.com/2010%20December%2010%2020%2028%2041.jpeg

KIP

reality beat 'the onion' to it

http://photoblog.msnbc.msn.com/_news/2011/08/22/7438702-biden-takes-on-wrestler-practices-archery-in-mongolia

Vice President Joseph R. Biden Jr., who also spoke, echoed their sentiments. He acknowledged Mr. Bush as “the man responsible for bringing our country together at a time when it could have been torn apart, for making it clear that America could not be brought to her knees.” He said that Mr. Bush’s leadership “helped us find our way, and for that you deserve our gratitude for a long, long time.”

http://www.nytimes.com/2011/09/11/us/11shanksville.html

sonofabitch bastard

wtf. i forgot he even existed and he had to remind me he did with that?

you didn't see Our President standing at the WTC with Bush on Sunday, 4 inches of daylight between them (literalizing their political relationship)?

Joe Biden makes like Peter Sellers.

Vice President Joe Biden used an accent to imitate call service employees during a speech on Thursday.

"How many times you get the call, 'I like to talk to you about your credit card?'" Biden said during an outsourcing speech in New Hampshire, employing the accent while imitating what he referred to as employees of "call centers rushed overseas."

"Or that ad on TV, what is it? 'Nancy, this is Nancy, can I talk to a supervisor?'" Biden said, referring to a Discover ad campaign featuring a heavily-accented man who acts as a credit card company's customer service representative under the name "Peggy."

This isn't Biden's first accent gaffe. As a Delaware senator in 2006, Biden said "you cannot go to a 7-Eleven or a Dunkin' Donuts unless you have a slight Indian accent," sparking criticism among his peers in Washington.

was anyone else surprised that Justice Stevens didn't hand Biden his robe and say "I quit" the second the VP oath was done?

― Dr Morbius, Tuesday, January 20, 2009

laffed at this

'I like to talk to you about your credit card?' curiously absent from my Twitterfeed. thank God some racist Republican didn't say it.

Amazing thing happening in this photo:
http://i2.cdn.turner.com/cnn/dam/assets/120315042725-bts-biden-dead-wrong-00000000-story-top.jpg

Took me a sec.

hahahahahaha

long hair, don't care

uh

Before his death, Osama bin Laden boldly commanded his network to organize special cells in Afghanistan and Pakistan to attack the aircraft of President Obama and Gen. David H. Petraeus.

“The reason for concentrating on them,” the al-Qaeda leader explained to his top lieutenant, “is that Obama is the head of infidelity and killing him automatically will make [Vice President] Biden take over the presidency. . . . Biden is totally unprepared for that post, which will lead the U.S. into a crisis. As for Petraeus, he is the man of the hour . . . and killing him would alter the war’s path” in Afghanistan.

pfft, whatever Osama. You thought the towers were going to topple over too, like dominoes.

I like to think of Biden as the Chewie of the Obama administration.

http://coensoit.com/pics/forum/gifs/biden_wut.gifhttp://i11.tinypic.com/53ucxtl.gif

www.youtube.com/watch?v=GwZ6UfXm410

www.youtube.com/watch?v=GwZ6UfXm410&

aww dammit

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GwZ6UfXm410

yeah wow. such a great, generous speech.

http://distriction.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/06/biden-waterfight-3.jpg

http://www.theconcentrium.com/mike/Poochie/01.jpg

reading through Richard Ben Cramer's endless What It Takes, I think the best parts are of Joe, in the middle of a desultory prez campaign in '87, suddenly remembers he's head of the Judiciary Committee and starts to pore through constitutional law for the sake of parrying Borkborkbork.

The circle is complete

http://jalopnik.com/5977200/real-joe-biden-calls-out-fake-joe-biden-over-corvette-v-trans+am-love

http://www.theonion.com/video/obama-issues-presidential-pardon-to-get-biden-out,31560/

http://talkingpointsmemo.com/assets_c/2013/03/oe-Biden-Rome-Francis-cropped-proto-custom_24.jpg

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/BFuQQ2zCYAA4iNV.jpg:large

http://gs1.wac.edgecastcdn.net/8019B6/data.tumblr.com/8a538c968003e31f3d1a28595f48a0f1/tumblr_mh9rgcPUen1qzpj3eo1_400.gif

I hope that was a larry david entrance posted by pp

this guy

http://www.politico.com/magazine/story/2014/02/joe-biden-profile-103667.html#.UxTs14UyyvQ

Looming over it all is the question of whether Biden will run in 2016. “He’s in a predicament. It’s so big, it’s almost literary,” a member of Obama’s inner circle told me, shortly after a Washington Post/ABC poll showed Clinton leading Biden by an epic 73 to 12 percent, the widest margin ever recorded for a presidential frontrunner. “Never in his entire life has this man been better positioned to get the thing he most wants: the presidency. He’s climbed almost all the way to the top. And guess what? Somebody moved the ladder. How would you deal with that?”

http://gawker.com/look-at-how-fuckable-joe-biden-was-1614639028

what did americans think about that new yorker article about him

It went at great lengths to prove he was a Serious Man.

Vice President Joseph R. Biden Jr. found himself presiding alone over the Old Senate Chamber, jovially posing for photos alongside the recently elected senators and their families with the panache of a game-show host.

He came ready with quips for every grandchild (“This is boring, boring, boring!” he said to one toddler on the verge of tears) and for each of his colleagues.

To Senator Thad Cochran, Republican of Mississippi: “Thaddeus — the best guy in the United States Senate!”

And to Senator Richard J. Durbin, Democrat of Illinois, who thanked him for swearing in all the senators: “Easy to swear at you!”

At one point, the vice president grew so excited that a small white mint flew from his mouth and onto the deep red carpet.

Mr. Biden was at his most sincere and enthusiastic with the women at hand — the granddaughters and daughters and mothers and wives and sisters (“Sis!”). He caressed their cheeks with both hands; wrapped them in bear hugs, with a firm hand on their backs; kissed them dangerously close to the lips; and nuzzled their faces.

"Most sincere and enthusiastic" huh?

More here:
http://www.pbs.org/newshour/rundown/best-biden-biden-new-congress-first-day/

I didn't see this the first time

http://i.imgur.com/nwQMGn6.jpg

Joe Biden Visits Williamsburg VICE HQ: "I'm A Weird Guy, I Go Where The Action Is"

http://gothamist.com/2015/02/04/joe_biden_vice_visit.php

dude

http://nymag.com/daily/intelligencer/2015/02/joe-biden-butt-buddy.html

http://36.media.tumblr.com/d39e1b9e0221c6753891e9631e833b64/tumblr_nk23ykxsf21rj0wxlo5_1280.jpg

http://40.media.tumblr.com/42c05692fdbed19e6f81bb0c78e858b3/tumblr_nk23ykxsf21rj0wxlo4_1280.jpg

http://40.media.tumblr.com/a51afb06b67330e68e36aec09025c1a3/tumblr_nk23ykxsf21rj0wxlo3_1280.jpg

http://41.media.tumblr.com/bef05bda7a47c3d7dc6b828b9910ed30/tumblr_nk23ykxsf21rj0wxlo1_1280.jpg

http://nymag.com/daily/intelligencer/2015/04/heres-joe-biden-sucking-on-a-babys-pacifier.html

the joe abides

Wow. Can we keep Biden alive forever?

EltonJohnson 2 hours ago
@LCNYC

So he's acting silly with a baby. So what?

Germs... viruses, bacteria. Many adults carry the herpes virus and never show symptoms.
FlagShareLikeReply

Beau Biden dead of brain cancer.

Mr. Biden is not ready to talk about the future and did not respond to a request for an interview. But he is seen in a different light for the moment. Wherever he goes these days, he receives condolences. Indeed, Mr. Biden’s grief has been so public, so human, in a way not seen in a sitting president or vice president in many years, that it has struck a nerve in Washington and beyond.

Senator Lindsey Graham of South Carolina, a Republican presidential candidate, choked up while talking to a video crew from the Huffington Post about Mr. Biden. “I called him after Beau died, and he basically said, ‘Well, Beau was my soul,’ ” Mr. Graham said with tears in his eyes.

When Mr. Graham retired from the Air Force Reserve, he noted, Mr. Biden made a point of attending the ceremony. “He’s the nicest person I think I’ve ever met in politics,” Mr. Graham said. “He is as good a man as God ever created. And we don’t agree on much, but I think he’s been dealt a really gut blow.”

http://www.nytimes.com/2015/07/13/us/politics/still-reeling-from-sons-death-joe-biden-weighs-his-political-future.html?ref=politics

Well, Beau was my soul

Oof.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G-BItOvXP48

cannot beeleeve this

http://www.nytimes.com/2015/08/02/us/politics/joe-biden-white-house-2016-presidential-campaign.html

sure you can

Well, Bernie was fun while it lasted. Nicely played, Dems!

i don't see how this would immediately hurt Sanders' support. Biden wd just slice into HRC's Only a Corporatist Asshole Can Win vote.

but how will this affect Chuck Todd

biden def preferable to hilary tbh

yes

how the fuck do you figure?

http://jpupdates.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/06/Clinton-Biden.jpg

how the fuck do you figure?

― skateboards are the new combover (Dr Morbius), Sunday, August 2, 2015 9:05 PM (51 minutes ago)

iirc biden has been the good angel in obama's ear (opposite hilary) on a few key issues, not saying he'll be great but if i had to choose i'd take him

http://www.counterpunch.org/2013/01/07/the-corruption-of-joe-biden/

http://i.imgur.com/YMVMwoU.jpg

An oasis of clarity in a world of blurry people. Vote for Joe.

"While Biden has shifted on some drug issues, he remains a staunch defender of his record on crime, even as Bill and Hillary Clinton have expressed their regret for the consequences of the 1994 crime bill and other anti-drug policies.

Joe Biden, in other words, is the Democratic face of the drug war."

http://www.slate.com/articles/news_and_politics/politics/2015/08/joe_biden_presidential_run_why_it_s_a_bad_idea.html

Joe being Joe

Great campaign photo there.

The Many Occasions Joe Biden Took Credit For Writing The Patriot Act

http://www.buzzfeed.com/andrewkaczynski/surveillance-joe#.lb4PROAJz

p4reene:

"The crime law—which Joe Biden was still calling the '1994 Biden Crime Bill' earlier this year—expanded the scope of the racist prison-industrial complex and helped balloon America’s incarcerated population. The bankruptcy bill was one of the most nakedly corporatist and anti-consumer pieces of legislation of the entire George W. Bush administration. (It also had the secondary effect of exacerbating the subprime mortgage crisis.)"

http://gawker.com/some-things-joe-biden-could-do-instead-of-running-for-p-1737899784

Connor Kilpatrick
‏@ckilpatrick
Rich liberals at the Oscars go wild for Biden, the man who made it almost impossible for regular people to discharge debt in bankruptcy

@DougHenwood
By the way, at the time, Eliz Warren told me the bill was written by a law firm for the credit card industry.

why did everybody stand up? are you supposed to? the way broadcast was edited seemed like Louis Gossett Jr. was first to stand so I figured maybe it was old school etiquette...

Yeah, the way they all stood for Elia Kazan.

http://www.rawstory.com/2016/06/you-are-a-warrior-joe-biden-writes-moving-open-letter-in-support-of-stanford-rape-survivor/

Manu Raju (CNN)
‏@mkraju
Just asked Biden if he's concerned w Bernie backers at DNC; said Ds should "show a little class" and let em be angry

@ggreenwald
Glad to see Biden say this. The bullying demands that all Sanders supporters instantly fall in line & cheer is gross

https://twitter.com/mkraju/status/757972317456695296

"Instantly"

like since Super Tuesday

https://twitter.com/VP/status/761253705341480962

Onion Biden and real Biden are now one

http://deadsp.in/wtdIBTU

“’Because I’m a billionaire I can do things other people can’t.’ What a disgusting assertion for anyone to make,” Biden said while campaigning for Democratic nominee Hillary Clinton in Pennsylvania. “The press always ask me, don’t I wish I was debating him? No, I wish we were in high school, and I could take him behind the gym. That’s what I wish."

Onion Biden and real Biden are now one

http://deadsp.in/wtdIBTU

― Ned Raggett, Thursday, October 20, 2016 3:37 PM (yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

lol this was EXACTLY what I came in this thread to post with EXACTLY the same sentiment

But there's also this Joe Biden

https://www.washingtonpost.com/politics/bidens-last-stand-convincing-democrats-not-to-give-up-on-the-white-working-class-voters-fueling-trump/2016/10/21/d4230d4a-7a94-11e6-ac8e-cf8e0dd91dc7_story.html

As his motorcade barreled into a high-dollar fundraiser in this wealthy St. Louis suburb recently, Vice President Biden noticed the firehouse next door. He told his aides to cut the fundraiser short a few minutes so that he and the Democrat running for Senate here could visit with the firefighters on the way out. These were his people, and for more than 10 minutes Biden talked to the fire company about what they do and how members of his own family had been saved by their work.

“Hey, I’ve used you guys several times, and it was great,” Biden told the crew, according to Clayton Fire Chief Mark Thorp. The fire crew was stunned by the gesture, Thorp said. “He just as easily could’ve gotten in his car and waved.”

Meanwhile: http://www.politico.com/story/2016/10/clinton-biden-secretary-of-state-230428

Neither Clinton, nor her aides have yet told Biden. According to the source, they’re strategizing about how to make the approach to the vice president

Guys, let's try to keep this between just us and Politico, okay? Oh, I can't wait to see the look on Joe's face when she springs the news!

I'm sure Jill will let the cat out of the bag before it's time.

As the State Dept becomes less powerful in relation to Defense, maybe affability and a 150 watt smile are roughly the right tools for the job. But the main talent HRC might be thinking about here may be his loyalty. He'd never go behind her back to slag her off to journalists because of an internal power struggle.

Plus another four years of Onion Biden stories, only this time with datelines from around the world

My LOL of the week:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hjx-1gE9J7U

https://scontent-sjc2-1.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/15171309_1126455830737269_7256971130739091606_n.jpg?oh=2a416a871f2878cb69c77147e7ec6060&oe=58C7F437

https://cdn-images-1.medium.com/max/2000/1*wXcs7rUo0i93g4oTqi8cxA.jpeg

from

https://medium.com/@WhiteHouse/behind-the-lens-2016-year-in-photographs-9e2c8733bbb3#.n48snl9n8

Beyond all of the most obvious awfulness of the next four years, I keep being reminded that we won't be seeing anyone from the executive branch just acting like a normal fucking human being who interacts with other human beings normally. Spray Trump with a super soaker and he'll just tweet about how sad and disrespectful that eight-year-old was.

...and Pence would sponsor the kid for electroshock.

well, yeah

The water stain on Pence's shirt would be the image of Christ. Amen.

and really, SuperSoaker optics are really important, like FLOTUS singing in James Corden's car

Someone on Reddit: Obama should resign a few days early just so Joe gets to be the 45th President for the next week.

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/C14U6VpXAAIwQK-.jpg

change we can believe in

It'll be on Snopes in five .. four ..

Zombies and Moustaches and Biden

http://www.npr.org/2017/01/12/509545778/in-surprise-send-off-president-obama-awards-biden-presidential-medal-of-freedom

you beautiful old bastard you

@DennisThePerrin
Only a decaying imperialist culture could venerate Joe Biden. There are no take backs.

@mrsinisterlefty
Come on, the man gifted Clarence Thomas to America. He deserves thanks from a grateful nation.

Godspeed to you and to Dennis in your search for the politician whose unimpeachable purity will lead us all into a new golden age filled with joy and prosperity and only the finest of linens and marble columns of such fine craftsmanship that to behold them is to weep.

notice how Morbs isn't quoting Charles Pierce (who was appropriately nuanced) this time.

what are some good biden portmanteaus and morbsian wordplays

joe lie-den

joe corporate buyden

those aren't very good though

glad yer down w/ Clarence, Old Lunch

(and presumably credit-card-co whoredom)

shove "purity" where bad improv goes

Your career?

I'd prefer it if Morbs took out a list of previous Medal of Freedom winners and told us how many deaths they caused

https://www.nytimes.com/2017/01/19/us/politics/joe-biden-delaware.html

So the quiet life that the Bidens lived away from their official duties in Washington, and the weekend rituals that were a large part of it, will continue. On Saturday that means taking Natalie and Hunter to the Charcoal Pit restaurant, where Mr. Biden will almost certainly order his usual meal of hamburger, French fries and milk shake that he has been gobbling down for decades, according to Juan Avilez, a cook at the Charcoal Pit who has been making that meal for Mr. Biden for 26 years.

“His all-time favorite is the black-and-white,” a vanilla milkshake mixed with chocolate syrup, Mr. Avilez said.

On Sundays, the Bidens will still be in the pews of St. Joseph on the Brandywine Roman Catholic Church just as they have been for decades. After the service, their habit is to stop by Janssen’s Market, where Xavier Vega, the weekend cook there, will fix up Mr. Biden’s usual breakfast: eggs over easy with a side of dry wheat toast.

Their beloved house will continue to serve as a refuge for the entire Biden clan. The only real change will be that Mr. Biden will need a new car, since the 1967 Corvette that he got from his father and still cherishes is just for special occasions.

http://www.politico.com/magazine/story/2017/01/joe-biden-barack-obama-partnership-white-house-214662

They spoke alone at their weekly lunches and alone after the Presidential Daily Briefing on intelligence and almost every important meeting when both were in Washington. But sometimes, their most important communication was unspoken. Obama and Biden worked in wordless tandem in the Situation Room, where Biden served as what Obama told me he called “my hidden proxy.” By pre-arrangement familiar to fans of buddy cop movies, Biden posed tough questions and offered provocative ideas that Obama wanted discussed but preferred not to raise himself, for fear of tilting the debate.

liked this -

Biden likes to say that “when they call me ‘Middle Class Joe,’ they don’t mean it as a compliment.” He’s still ticked off at Eric Schmidt, the executive chairman of Google, for lobbying him on an internet piracy bill with the argument: “You understand we’re the economic engine of America. We will deluge the White House.” Biden offered respect for Google’s “value-added” but told me he felt like throwing Schmidt out of his office. He pointed out that, all together, the tech sector employed fewer workers than GM shed in a single year during the Great Recession.

yeah fuck eric schmidt

here is a horribly, horribly written story that contains a gem of clearest Joe
http://www.foxbusiness.com/politics/2017/06/23/joe-biden-s-beef-with-bill-ackman-sparks-heated-exchange-and-presidential-chatter.html

Biden explained that part of the decision stemmed from the death of his son Beau Biden, who died of brain cancer in 2015. The room grew quiet as Biden became emotional, and said: “I’m sorry…I’ve said enough.”

That’s when Ackman blurted out “Why? That’s never stopped you before.”

The formal, and understated dinner conversation suddenly turned tense, according to three people who were present and confirmed both the substance and the wording of Biden’s responses.
Biden, these people say, turned to someone seated near him, and asked, “who is this asshole?,” a reference to Ackman.

Then he turned directly to Ackman and stated: “look, I don't know who you are, wiseass, but never disrespect the memory of my dead son!” these people say.

Ackman attempted what was described as an apology, to which Biden said, "just shut the hell up."

(and here is nymag's attempt to edit it into something people would read: http://nymag.com/daily/intelligencer/2017/06/biden-owned-a-billionaire-who-mocked-him-over-his-late-son.html)

fuck Joe btw

Joe Biden: "I wish I had been able to do more for Anita Hill. I owe her an apology." https://t.co/NKi2RBHm7F

— Kyle Griffin (@kylegriffin1) December 14, 2017

He was the chairman of the senate judiciary committee. He was ABLE to do more than he did. Also, on "owing" her an apology...it's been 26 years, dude.

— Rebecca Traister (@rtraister) December 14, 2017

You might think having been vice president would help Joe Biden get elected, but the last Democratic Party vice president to become president (without their predecessor dying in office) was Martin Van Buren in 1836.

— Jon Schwarz (@schwarz) January 7, 2019

this balloon got mad experience in losing

The thread in and of itself is unobjectionable, lord knows we're gonna need a rolling lolling Biden thread for at least 4 years

xpost

― some dude, Tuesday, January 20, 2009

Joe Biden is who the Jon Hamm character on 30 Rock grows up into.

I've never worn a watch and don't have a cell phone, leaving me as the only teacher in the world who depends on students to keep him apprised of the time whenever I take them outside. To remedy that, I bought a cheap watch online today. Good reviews, and only $15, but I don't know, something feels wrong.

https://i.postimg.cc/25VwP3N4/watch.jpg

biden time