Frightening creature

I've been in a cage with a tiger (don't ask), that was pretty scary. Crocs are pretty horrible.

Crocodiles win this hands down. They're like the dinosaurs that just didn't die out.

http://freakytrigger.co.uk/ft/seven/2004/10/freaky-trigger-top-25-scariest-thingsno24-crocodiles/

Scorpions might have got a few votes

By the way, you can't just say things like "I've been in a cage with a tiger" and then not elaborate.

I know. It was for a photo. Not my idea.

It was for a photo of you getting your head bitten off?

others, massive silver back gorilla that just won't stop pounding away on your head. Shitting hell.

Croc easy. I feel like I might be able to reason with most everything else, but a croc's like an freaky alien killing machine. With sharks you can just not go swimming, and spiders you just step on.

scary things about crocs is how they seem completely hidden, until you accidentally tread on its back..

http://image04.webshots.com/4/6/14/39/106861439OIiRuz_fs.jpg

Just look at their eyes! They are gonna fuck you up.

a vicious rat is a nasty thing, so unbelievably fast if it jumps at you. my house mate had his nose messed up thanks to his angry pet (huge) white rat. which later died in mysterious circumstances involving a brick and a sink full of water.

Careful now, that swan could break your arm

snakes gahhhh. i'm terrified of even small ones.

Polar bear! I had a dream about being trapped in some cabin with polar bear breaking down the wall and coming for me, it actually got to bite my legs before I woke up. My heart was pounding when I woke up and every time I see a polar bear on a programme, it reminds me of that dream.

How on earth does my mind know what it’s like to have my leg bitten by a polar bear?

Polar bears look cuddly though, not esp. true of crocodiles

http://www.nhm.ac.uk/resources-www/visit-us/whats-on/temporary-exhibitions/swpy/2007/popup/50.jpg

^ the stuff of nightmares

Or dreams, if you're Timothy Treadwell from that Herzog film.

crocs n gators seem ludicrous to me because they're always smiling. if one were about to eat me, I'd think, "well, at least he is pleased about it."

sharks are pretty creepy but mostly because they're unseen, shifting around under the water's surface. face to face they lack personality, it would be like getting attacked by a statue with lifeless eyes, black eyes, like a doll's eye.

massive silver back gorilla on the rampage would be pretty frightening, and grizzlies are too. something terrifying about something so big and fast and vicious attacking you, not because it's hungry, but because it's pissed.

Gruesome grizzly attack as man, bear shield own

By CAROL SMITH
SEATTLE POST-INTELLIGENCER REPORTER

In the split second before he saw the grizzly's fangs, Johan Otter heard his daughter Jenna's startled voice.

"Oh NO!" Jenna Otter, 18, had been hiking just ahead of her dad as they zigzagged up the steep switchbacks of the Grinnell Glacier Trail at Glacier National Park on Aug. 25. As she turned a blind corner just above the tree line, she stumbled into the path of a sow with two cubs.

The mother bear surged straight for the man. Her teeth sank into his right thigh, and her long claws raked his face, shattering his right eye socket.

In the surreal moments that followed, he tried to keep the bear focused on himself.

"Stay with me," he remembers thinking. "Just don't go to Jenna."

And so the bear and the 43-year-old administrator at Scripps Memorial Hospital in La Jolla, Calif., locked in an ancient battle hardwired into each of their genes: Protect your young at all costs. Even your life.

Otter, a marathoner, threw himself 30 feet down an embankment with the bear in pursuit to try to get farther away from his daughter. The bear, estimated at about 400 pounds, landed on top of his back.

She had an "out of this world" strength, said Otter. "I was like a rag doll, and I weigh 185 pounds." She flung him back and forth, and he fell even farther. By then, he could feel his spine had fractured. (Doctors would later find five vertebrae breaks, plus three shattered ribs.)

"I reached up and grabbed her by the throat," he said. With his other hand he scrabbled for a rock or his bear spray, with no success. "I knew I couldn't push her away."

Frantic, he tried to cover his head with his arms, as hikers are warned to do by park rangers.

"I felt her tooth go into my scalp," he said. "I thought, 'Oh, this is no good.' " Then he felt his scalp rip clean away.

Otter, whose wry sense of humor was just about the only thing left intact by the attack, lived (barely) and recounted his ordeal Friday from Harborview Medical Center, where surgeons fashioned him a new scalp and bolted his battered body back together.

He recalled that with his head clamped in the bear's jaws, he could hear his skull crack. It occurred to him he could die.

"But then I thought, 'No, that's not an option today.' "

And just as suddenly, he felt the bear release him.

His next thought: "Oh my God, Jenna." He lay in a stream, on a small embankment 50 feet below the trail. He couldn't move. He made no noise, not wanting to incite the bear. He hoped the bear had released its fury on him and would have little left for his daughter.

He tried to see through his bloody eye. There were "strings of scalp" hanging down in front of his face. He could see the tendons exposed in his arm.

What he couldn't see was his daughter curled into a fetal position, on a ledge 20 feet above him, her eyes wide open, facing the bear. The bear clamped down -- biting first Jenna's face, then her shoulder.

Jenna, an experienced hiker who, like her father, was familiar with bear-safety protocol, didn't flinch, her father recounted later. "That's courage."

The bear, finally spent, left the two alone.

also, dreams of wild animals in the house indicate you feel some part of your life is out of control < /freud>

I voted croc, but am thinking people are underestimating the Gila Monster here. At least with bears you get mauled to death by something vaguely pleasant-looking and furry. If you were in the Arctic you'd probably be glad of the fluffy warmth as the huge beast eats your face off.

yea, i'm going w/ either of the bears on this one.

gila monster? you might as well be afraid of a three-toed tree sloth

I'm feeling kind of sorry for the misunderstood gila monster now

Though the Gila monster is venomous, its sluggish nature means that it represents little threat to humans. However, it has earned a fearsome reputation, and is often killed by hikers and homeowners, despite being protected by state law in Arizona and Nevada.

I guess that's what happens when your name is "monster"

I'm gonna start a campaign to rename them gila friends

Komodo dragon hella scarier

Actually, I think I was picturing the Komodo dragon when I was saying the Gila Monster was scary. But still, they're both pretty freakish looking.

oh man, tiger or a lion. because they are super fast...

Something tells me I maybe could outrun an alligator or outsmart a lumbering ol' grizzy bear. But once a tiger gets you in it's sights you are fucked.

come on guys:

http://images.smarter.com/blogs/grizzly.jpg

Squeeeee!

I think deadly jellyfish might scare me more than most of the things on this list, mostly because you're more likely to be stung to death than eaten.

Also, like, way ugly.

Polar bears look cuddly though

― Sacco, Vanzetti, Passantino... (Tom D.),
Right, now all i need is a hug...
http://www.moonbattery.com/archives/polar-bear.jpg

crappy quality video but i sing this song to my kid every night after her bath and our favorite part is the bear part

also as terrifying as crocodiles are they at least have the decency to drown you before they eat you

And so the bear and the 43-year-old administrator at Scripps Memorial Hospital in La Jolla, Calif., locked in an ancient battle hardwired into each of their genes: Protect your young at all costs. Even your life.

Otter, a marathoner, threw himself 30 feet down an embankment with the bear in pursuit to try to get farther away from his daughter. The bear, estimated at about 400 pounds, landed on top of his back.

In a DANCE as OLD as TIME.

Can i come in your tent for some snuggles?
http://www.freedomwriter.com/issue35/ak34.htm
oops, did i snuggle too hard :(

The terrifying Gila Monster, folks:

http://bioweb.uwlax.edu/bio203/s2008/sabourin_joel/gila%20food%201.jpg

Hahaha! Nooo, get it away from me.

Aiiieee not_goodwin, that last photo is really quite gross.

outsmart a lumbering ol' grizzy bear

see that's what scary about them, they look big and slow and dumb, but they will fucking run you down

In spite of their massive size, these bears can run at speeds of up to 64 kilometres per hour (40 miles per hour).

How come no Honey Badger on here?
<object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/c81bcjyfn6U&hl=en&fs=1";></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/c81bcjyfn6U&hl=en&fs=1"; type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object>
Particularly like the way it shrugs off being poisoned by snake with a snooze!

aww, can a mod fix that please?

Python eats alligator, then explodes

http://blogs.herald.com/photos/uncategorized/gator.JPG

I'm having difficulty understanding that picture

― emilys. (emilys.), Wednesday, October 5, 2005 9:36 PM (3 years ago) Bookmark

it looks like the thing with three tails

oh my GOD

Do you mind, I'm eating here

I think bears and wolves and other mammals have become so anthropomorphized for me that even under attack, I'd be all thinking "Are you looking for a pick-a-nick basket, Mr. Bear?"

Meanwhile, snakes are these slippery, silent creatures that can live on land or in water and kill you by suffocation, poison, biting, or a combination of all three.

A bear barreling through my doorway would be one thing, but I gotta say it'd be much scarier to wake up, rub my eyes groggily, and look down to see a boa constrictor squeezing me in the darkness.

yeah, i think we're really just writing off sharks because 'you could just leave the water'. you could just avoid continents where there are bears and snakes, but that's not the question.

which of these creatures that would look at you with terrible hunger, utterly annihilate you and leave no trace (black widow excepted, obv) is the most scary? kind of assumes you're there already. So:

http://scienceblogs.com/deepseanews/mbn_shark_wideweb__470x321,0.jpg

I think this is an elvis vs. beatles thing. are you more afraid of the higher or lower beings on the evolutionary scale?

xp to pp

do yourself a favor and dont GIS shark attack

also

http://bitcast-a.v1.fra1.bitgravity.com/break/dnet/media/2008/11/73%20Bird-Eating%20Spider.jpg

my fear increases as you go up the evolutionary scale, with humans being the most frightening creature ever

spiders = creepy
grizzly = frightening

that spider is not frightening. christopher walken on a good day is frightening, that spider is lovecraftian

do yourself a favor and dont GIS shark attack

I'm filing this under well duh

other things you might not want to GIS

"spilled intestines"
"is this infected?"
"gene simmons sextape"

i guess i think a lot more about bears because i've seen them in the wild and they're more of a threat to me personally when i go to the country and stuff. however, a crocodile ate someone i knew once, and i can't say that about any of the other options - so i'm going with them.

Giant Squid, they have 'beaks' I really don't want to be eaten by a beak.

Good job the pterodactyl died out, eh?

Another vote for the giant squid here

yeah, like that nature video of them mating where the female turns red with anger and the male goes white with fear, and then the female plunges her Special Tentacle into his Special Appendage

hentai is not a nature video

actually if this could eat you I might vote for it

feral demon children are the scariest thing on earth imo id throw down with any of nature's beasts before id cross paths w/evil kids esp if they are a) possessed by ghosts/demons/evil wizards and/or b) aryan looking

for proof of this google the trailer for "home movie"

I know. It was for a photo. Not my idea.

Am guessing corporate motivational poster.

cover of 'What Circus' ?

this thread needs some abbott

Abbott's not scary

everything on this thread is fine compared to pashmina's last thread along these lines. lest we forget: arachnopoll of fear

croc probably the worst though.

Hideous.

http://seedandsew.files.wordpress.com/2008/08/jenniegarth_crocs.jpg

lifeless eyes, black eyes, like a doll's eye

I dunno, crocs and sharks are the worst if in their element, but a shark on land is a Simpson's joke, and a croc on land, although I'm told they're "surprisingly" fast, is still hypothetically beat-able. There are people who wrestle them, after all -- I don't want to wrestle it, I just want to tie my shirt around its mouth so it can't open the Jaws of Germy Death. At least you can have an objective.

A grizzly -- no objective. It can outrun you, it can outclimb you, and it can swim. You are dead.

Something tells me I maybe could outrun an alligator

crocs move at a top speed of 11 mph which is pretty fast but they don't have stamina. also they can't climb trees, which is one advantage a human would have as opposed to a bear or a lion or a tiger.

as much as i'd like to say a croc, which would be my second choice, i'm gonna say a black widow, since i feel like at any moment one of those fuckn things is gonna fall on my face and kill me.

black widows are pretty unassuming IRL.

also, their bite is rarely fatal.

xp laurel on fuckn point

the only thing about grizzlies is that you have to be a fuckn retard to get yourself matched up w/ one of those. crocs/gators esp in the south obv just chill the fuck out in ponds and shit. and while you have to go near one obv to get in trouble, sometimes one that's been chillin in a pond for like 45 years will just up and fuck a little kid up or something. happens like 5 times a year in florida id imagine.

if we're talking odds on which I'm going to encounter, I'm going to have to vote "other"

eh prelim research would suggest that im overstating the frequency of croc/gator deaths, but still

I think hikers run across grizzlies by accident, too, Jordan. Esp during the parts of the year when momma bears have cubs at which time you don't have to actually offer any threat to the bear, it just has to sense you in its environment -- anywhere within sniffing or hearing distance.

yeah that's true

Not to get all Dwight K Schrute on the matter, but: Assuming that each of these animals wants to kill you, and that you are not just randomly chancing upon them in their natural habitat, I would first eliminate those which I could potentially thwart or evade, removing the gila monster, fuck-off snake, spider & gator-croc. Of the remaining contenders, the shark seems by far the worst contender b/c the others would just make quick work of you, whereas the shark would bite off a chunk, swim around for a while & then swoop in a bite off another chunk. Meanwhile, you'd be bobbing up and down in the water wondering if you are going to bleed to death before being consumed.

there have been slightly more fatal bear attacks in north america than alligators according to wiki - i think my personal memory was distorted because two women were killed by gators in separate incidents on my birthday in 2006 o_O

black widows are pretty unassuming IRL.

also, their bite is rarely fatal.

― altered prostates (latebloomer), Thursday, April 2, 2009 12:50 PM (9 minutes ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

once this girl at my college got bit by a black widow and she didnt know and she started to get really sick and she went to the clinic @ my school and first they told her that she might be pregnant and then changed that diagnosis to 'cancer' and she made an appt with an oncologist and everything and dude was like uh.jpg u have a black widow bite not cancer and she left the school

btw i'm actually an alligator and i ate those women for my birthday. later yall going back to my creek

I think hikers run across grizzlies by accident, too, Jordan. Esp during the parts of the year when momma bears have cubs at which time you don't have to actually offer any threat to the bear, it just has to sense you in its environment -- anywhere within sniffing or hearing distance.

there's a reason campers hang their foodstuffs from a rope and it ain't superstition

yeah it seems by reading over the blurbs here

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_fatal_bear_attacks_in_North_America#2000s

that a lot of the deaths are ppl who're walking in the woods and then get mauled for no reason

They hang their food from a rope so that no bears can get to it, period. That includes relatively harmless varieties like black bears, which will steal food but basically never a attack a human if that human isn't actively threatening the bear or its young.

i wd like to change my vote to "bear"

all sorts of wonderful facts here

http://adventure.howstuffworks.com/bear-attack.htm/printable

Tigers, polar bears and crocs are the most likely to kill and eat humans. Lions are a bit less inclined, but are not above human fare.

A black widow spider bite is only fatal if you are acutely sensitive to the venom and the spider won't know or care what happens once it bites you. Eating you is out of the question. A gila monster is just a bit more likely to kill you and no more likely to eat you.

Sharks will eat people, but since people just don't make up that large a segment of its food source, they mostly seem puzzled by humans in the water and rarely attack unless there is blood in the water. Sharks appear to attack surfers because surfboards make surfers look a lot like seals, which sharks eat with gusto.

Grizzlies will kill humans, but more out of bad temper than because they are hungry. The main rule is: do not annoy them. (Hint: they annoy easily.)

I figure the most horrific death would be by a huge-ass constrictor, like a python or boa. Once the snake has coiled aorund you it patiently waits for you to breath. When you exhale, it tightens. It's as simple as that.

A croc will drag you under and whirl you around and around until you stop moving, then stash you under a log to rot a little before it eats you.

Based on my personal nightmares (my sleeping ones) I voted crocs.

A croc will drag you under and whirl you around and around until you stop moving, then stash you under a log to rot a little before it eats you.

yeah i forgot to mention this — in my gparents' retirement community in central fla, one of the residents was out by a lake there (dunno why) and he got attacked by a croc, but he was only knocked unconscious underwater, and we woke up sometime after the croc stored him. don't remember what his injuries were tho

Sharks, because at least I can run pretty fucking fast when i need to, or like drive away from a grizzly. Stuck in water with fucking Jaws coming at me though, there is no way I'm going to still have the motor function to defend myself, keep breathing properly and keep swimming. I'd be torn apart limb by precious limb.

Grizzlies rarely seek out humans for attack, unless they're hungry and predatory -- in which case, yes, they'll likely attempt to kill and eat you. But most of the time, a grizzly just wants to remove a threat. A bear standing on its hind legs is not necessarily going to charge you; it's usually just trying to get a better look and smell. When a bear is agitated and upset, it will do any number of things -- put its ears back, lower its head, swing its head from side to side, paw at the ground, make woofing or growling noises or simply charge without warning. If a bear looks you directly in the eye with its ears back, it's definitely feeling threatened, and you should take this as a serious warning. If it begins to "pop" its jaw, it's getting ready to charge. It could "bluff" charge you to gauge your reaction, or it could knock you right down.

add unpredictable to list of charming bear traits

Some bears will actually stalk you. Usually they're young male bears who have not yet learned the dangers of interacting with humans. In this case, you'll have to defend yourself aggressively.

the thing about sharks are - you kind of don't have a shot, but unlike bears, i don't think they are as persistent? also we're much stronger than sharks obv who don't have limbs, so like if you're able to punch a shark twice in the eyes you might be okay. also, you hear about shark bites fairly often (comparably) i feel like, but you don't ever really hear about "bear bites"

The question is about what's the scariest though, logic rarely comes into that shit.

http://static.howstuffworks.com/gif/bear-attack-4.jpg

I hate to be a pedant here, but statistically the most dangerous animals would be...

mosquitos: ~2-3 million fatalities a year
venomous snakes: ~50,000-125,000 fatalities a year
scorpions: ~800-2,000 fatalities a year
big cats (tigers, lions, etc.): ~800 fatalities a year
crocodiles: ~600-800 fatalities a year
elephants: ~300-500 fatalities a year
hippos: ~100-150 fatalities a year
jellyfish: ~100 fatalities a year
sharks: ~100 fatalities a year
bears: ~5-10 fatalities a year

animal.info (poss. not the most credible source?)

deadliest ≠ most frightening, of course, but it's interesting nonetheless.

you might be wondering whether you should use your gun, if you've got one. Guns versus bears isn't recommended, and not just because most national parks ban the use of firearms. According to a study by bear biologist Thomas Smith, bear spray halted aggressive bear behavior a whopping 92 percent of the time. Guns, on the other hand, were successful only 67 percent of the time.

o shit, grizzly impervious to gunfire

xpost to Jordan: yeah, ur right. Now that I think about it, sharks have sensitive noses, so if you can land a good, solid punch or two, you actually might make a convincing argument for them to leave you alone. FWIW, though, I don't think most shark "bites" remain as such b/c of the targets' ability or willingness to defend themselves, but rather b/c either the person was able to get to safety before the shark circled back around, or the shark realized that the person was not the helpless seal they had originally thought & moved on to find a tastier meal.

When a grizzly enters your tent, it's definitely a worst-case scenario.

really, you don't say

polar bears will stalk you and fuck you up

if they want to, they can swim to your house and eat you before you finish typi

They won't follow me all the way down here, so I'm sure I'll be fine

grizzly bear scientific name is ursus arctos horribilis

even zoologists are like keep this thing away from me

i'm not especially afeared of any of these! i wouldn't want to go fucking about with any of them, tho.

i guess i vote shark because all the others seem like they could be avoided, and yeah you could stay out of ALL OCEANS forever, but if you're in one you are really out of your element

okay, i voted shark before reading the thread but HOLY SHIT @ that grizzly bear story posted above (about the dude & his daughter) and the polar bear attack photos O_O. i would like to change my vote to bear.

http://tf.org/images/covers/Edge_1997-tf.org.jpg

DO NOT FUCK WITH POLAR BEARS

grizzly impervious to gunfire

You should read about the first encounter between the Lewis and Clark expedition and a grizzly bear. Up until then, white europeans had only encountered black bears. They shot one, thinking to kill it to eat. It charged. They shot it again. All they had were muzzle-loaders, so each time a gun was fired, it was spent. They kept shooting it. It fell dead a few feet from them. They were fucking impressed!

A bit later they told the Native Americans about the encounter, and the natives told them this was what to expect. Themselves, they stayed the fuck away from grizzlies and counseled L&C to do the same.

i'm sorry, but lol formatting:

The third boy decided not to go wading in the moat and remained outside the enclosure, although he had taken off his trousers. A Gruesome Sight

After careful consideration I've decided I don't want to be attacked by a bear.

If yr caught and definitely going to die, a big snake would provide one of the worst possible deaths, especially if yr conscious when it starts to eat you. Pretty sure cows kill a lot of people.

xpost: I'm sorry, but why do zoos need to heighten their security to prevent people from sneaking into bear habitats at night? I mean, Jesus, come on people..

really, these people understand evolution, this is about weeding the gene pool

I hate to be a pedant here, but statistically the most dangerous animals would be... - y that list reminds me that the animal I'd least want to encounter in the wild is an angry, territorial hippo. I'm voting for "other" on that basis.

candiru

You guys know about the candiru, right?

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Candiru

candiruuuuuu

candiruuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu

yes, at college it was the highlight of my poisonous and venomous animals class

fuck

This fish is also known to attack humans and animals and swim into an orifice (the anus, or vagina).[4] Because of spines protruding from the fish, it is almost impossible to remove except through surgery.[8] Though there have been documented candiru attacks on humans,[9] there is no evidence the fish can survive once inside a human. The danger for the person lies more in the infection and shock that results from having the organism lodged in sensitive tissues for an extended period of time than from physical damage done by the actual fish itself.

dearest wikipedia, thanks but no thanks

"Article on removal of candiru from a male patient with pictures"

Kinda makes being slowly swallowed alive by a constrictor seem quaint, don't it?

Sharks, easily (assuming you're stuck in the ocean with no land in sight), esp. great white sharks. It's their environment, with them stalking you from below, making sharks so much more frightening.

sneaked into the polar bear enclosure.
What was he expecting to happen?
What a fuckin idiot!

Although, all these Disney films with friendly talking animals like Madagascar & Jungle book could be to blame, couldn’t they?

there are stories of emergency riverbank surgeries to extricate candiru

There are stories of doberman pinschers choking on human hands.

I wrote "Gila monster" when what I actually meant was "Komodo Dragon"

I'd narrow it down to Grizzly bear or Tiger, because I cannot imagine anything worse than being out in the wild somewhere and having either of those fuckers after you and hungry. Grizzly wins because there's something terrifyingly unstoppable about the things, like you can't outrun it, outswim it, climb up a tree to get away from it or outfight it, and you'd need to be carrying a GAU-8 or suchlike to take the fucker down. My dream last night might be the most frightening thing I have ever dreamed of!

Kinda makes being slowly swallowed alive by a constrictor seem quaint, don't it?

In theory this is the worst of the lot, but cannot take it srsly since discovering the subset of furrydom who get off on that sort of thing.

there are stories of a man with a hook for a hand who haunts lovers lane

if we're including furries then I think they win

Candiru :(
http://www.cbu.edu/%7Eseisen/ParasitesOnParade_files/image085.jpg
Dr Anuar Samad removed a Candirú from a man in 1997. Photo: Anuar Samad.

thanks to this thread, I will hence be keeping bear mace on my person at all times.

fuck, that picture

Gators/crocs are another story. We used live in Florida and my mom worked in a hospital built next to a lake (i.e. swamp). A couple of times a year one of these fuckers would crawl into the hospital, and they'd have to go into lockdown and call the sheriff, who would come with shotguns and wrestle the beast down and them blow its brains out. Holy shit, you're sick in the hospital and next thing you know, you're gator bait.

I can see it now, coming round from an operation thinking you’re seeing things and decide to ignore the approaching alligator.

well, at least there would be plenty of "gator aid" on hand (be-ding-dang-crash)

after reading all this grizzly (grisly) stuff, i vow never to go to canada or alaska.

http://i5.photobucket.com/albums/y176/edwardiii/Tiger_attack_elephant2.gif

holy shit talk about flying tigers

oh no way

xxxpost: or the serengeti, or the amazon, or the everglades, or the ocean, etc. etc.

or space

just stay at home and hope the black widows don't get in

space furries will fuck u up

mosquitos themselves don't kill ppl--that is just some ridiculous plasmodium propoganda

mostquitos don't kill people, people kill people.

http://images.wikia.com/wikiality/images/4/46/BearShark.jpg

you've never been to new jersey, have you. skeeters are like freaking bats down there.

xp

I'll take an NJ mosquito over an upstate NY black fly any day.

http://i5.photobucket.com/albums/y176/edwardiii/jaws.jpg

^ pennsylvania great white ^

is misrepresented in Ted Bell's novel Spy as swimming up the urine stream of someone standing knee-deep in water, then living inside the person.

Always looking for library book suggestions, thanks wikipedia!

great big fuck-off snake of some sort! I like the open-ended-ness of this answer.

great big fuck-off snake of some sort! I like the open-ended-ness of this answer

Hopefully something more convincing than this truly pathetic effort:

http://rwsphoto.blogspot.com/2009/02/nabau-borneo-giant-snake.html

great big fuck-off snake of some sort!

haha pash i googled "gau-8"

this pic is lolhueg: http://ohermenauta.files.wordpress.com/2009/01/gau-8_meets_vw_type_12.jpg

The most common theory is that the photo has been manipulated on a computer.
This is known as photo-shopped image.

Scorpions... their sting kills, but they are so small that you wouldn't see them until it was too late. There could be one crawling up towards the back of your neck right now.

somehow scorpions are more scary to me than black widow spiders, as spiders are our friends.

Scorpians over . . . Great White Sharks? Can't see it.

My childhood fears after seeing Jaws must be coloring my view.

Scorpians over . . . Great White Sharks? Can't see it.

a great white shark is not going to creep into your bedroom and kill you in your sleep, now is it?

that's the beauty of evolution

The most blood chilling sound of all is surely that of a shark flubbering relentlessly up your staircase and scrabbling at your doorknob with its deadly overbite.

All this to a soundtrack of rasping gills and the cat hissing like a punctured airbed.

Scorpians over . . . Great White Sharks? Can't see it.

_____________________________________

a great white shark is not going to creep into your bedroom and kill you in your sleep, now is it?

Here in South Florida, my chances of facing a shark while swimming at the beach are a whole lot higher than some scorpian creeping into my bedroom. I've got a better chance of being gnawed to death by rabid opossums on my front porch.

yeah, you laugh now

http://forums.pelicanparts.com/uploads13/opossum+503911215324486.jpg

Blech! Opposums used to climb up on our front porch every night to eat leftover cat food. I hated them. Big, evil rats.

what does a leftover cat eat?

what does a leftover cat eat?

Scorpians.

ok, we're getting closer to a definitive table to answer this question i feel. now, what odds am i getting on grizzly vs great white?

important information, just received on email:

http://www.geocities.com/darraghmac/image002.jpg

http://www.geocities.com/darraghmac/image017.jpg

http://www.geocities.com/darraghmac/image021.jpg

definitely shark, c'mon.

ooh, snakes could win...
http://thebeautybrains.com/wp-content/uploads/2006/12/120106-snake-bite.jpg
A bite from those well known grumpy Rattlesnakes,
http://www.envenomated.com/images/articles/jshandbite.jpg

hey there's no need for that.

ah come on now lads

motherfuckin' snakes!

/samuel l jackson

I have a fancy that somehow I could outrun a snake. Unless it was wrapped around my leg obv.

A bite from any of the other animals would leave you with no arm at all. Going with the croc.

Squinting one eye as I answered black widow mother-f**king spider.

which is scarier: snakes or spiders?

I've been trying to come up with a good Virgin Killer vs Fire line, but it's really not worth it, is it.

Voted polar bear with write-in for angry mummy hippo in second.

I don't see a scorpion attack as frightening - they're tiny, probably stinging you defensively, and want to get away from you ASAP. there's a creepy crawly aspect to a snake or spider bite, but I wouldn't call it shitting-yr-pants frightening (unless you have snake or spider phobias, in which case you're probably afraid of harmless snakes and spiders, too).

it is down to grizzly vs. shark in my mind, but the question is similar to "would you rather be set on fire, or drawn and quartered?" both would suck and what would be more frightening is pretty personal. getting eaten by a tiger is probably no walk in the park either, but at least they finish you off pretty quickly.

grizzly attacks can be long in duration with a high level of mutilating trauma. they will really fuck you up. cracking skulls, biting faces, tearing off limbs, jumping up and down on you.

Case was taking pictures for a surveying job along the remote Bella Coola coastal area of British Columbia, north of Vancouver, on May 3 when he was attacked by the grizzly. A seasoned outdoorsman, he said he’s developed a sixth sense that tells him when he’s being watched by someone or something.

“When I feel there’s something watching me, my hair just goes up on edge,” he told Lauer. On that day, “It went up on my left side. I looked over at my left and here’s the grizzly coming at me aggressively, and I said, ‘Oh, my God.’ ”

‘He’s eating my brains’
Case was holding an ax in his right hand, but the bear was too close and looked too intent on harm for Case to even consider using it. Instead, he dropped it and fell to the ground, curling up in the fetal position and telling himself not to move.

The bear grabbed one arm and tore into it, then took Case’s head in its mouth and shook him, tearing gaping wounds that left his scalp hanging in bloody flaps.

Case related his thought processes to Canadian reporters when he was well enough to talk: “ ‘He's eating my brains. I know it, I can feel it. I hope he gets over it soon.’ I was hurting so bad and I was bleeding all over, I said, ‘I'm going to die.’ ”

At that point, all he wanted was for the bear to finish his business quickly. But after throwing Case into a boggy area and jumping on him a few times, the bear finally backed off. Although the grizzly was still not far away, Case saw his opportunity and, bleeding heavily from his scalp and both arms, he ran in a crouch to his truck, which was parked nearby.

In his 24 years with the Anchorage Fire Department, Mike Crotty had never seen injuries so traumatic. The victim, a 15-year-old girl, had been mauled by a grizzly bear while competing in a bike race. She was covered in blood, her carotid artery was damaged, and much of her body had been bitten and mauled.

“It was sudden, horrifying, and the injuries she suffered left a deep impact on all of us,” Crotty told TODAY’s Matt Lauer Tuesday from Anchorage, Alaska. “This is one of the most significant traumatic injuries that I’ve seen.”

Thanks to her courage and ability to think clearly despite horrible injuries, Petra Davis is going to be all right, said Peter Bassinger, the man who found her moments after the Sunday morning attack on a trail in Far North Bicentennial Park.

“She will recover fine, I think, eventually. It’s going to be kind of a long recovery, but she’s going to be OK,” said Bassinger, a fellow bike rider who has known Davis for much of her life.

Both riders were more than 13 hours into a 24-hour trail-bike race that had begun at noon Saturday and followed a loop through the myriad trails in the park. Bassinger told The Anchorage Daily News that he saw a bike on the side of the trail, then saw a figure covered in blood sitting in the middle of the trail. It was around 1:30 a.m., and there was enough light to navigate by in the high latitude, but not enough to see distinctly. He didn’t recognize his friend, she was so badly injured.

‘A lot of blood’
“When I first saw her, it was in a real low-light situation,” Bassinger told Lauer. “I couldn’t tell to what extent she’d been hurt. There was a lot of blood. I didn’t know what had really happened. She basically just said, ‘Bear,’ and it was pretty clear that there had been an attack.”

Though desperately injured, Davis handed Bassinger her cell phone. He punched in 911, but the phone’s keyboard was locked. She unlocked the phone for him, and he dialed the emergency number, but got a recording saying it couldn’t be reached. He tried a second time, again needing Davis’ help to unlock the phone, but had the same result. Finally, he called the event’s race director, Greg Matyas, and told him to get help.

Bassinger said he was worried that the bear was still in the area and might attack again. He picked Davis up and carried her about 30 feet down the trail, where he put her on the ground with her feet slightly above her head to fight off shock. Only as he was tending her did he realize the wounded rider was his friend and fellow rider, Davis.

Bassinger told the newspaper that EMTs on the phone told him to put pressure on Davis’ wounds to stanch the flow of blood. But because she seemed to be bleeding everywhere — she had wounds to her head, neck, chest, thigh and buttocks — he didn’t know where to press.

As I came over a hill and onto a bench of open timber, I saw movement in the trees off to my left. At first it was hard to fathom: two brown shapes hurtling into the air, 35 yards away. Then I realized they were first-year grizzly cubs, the size of German shepherds. The cubs had been nursing as the mother lay on her back. At the sight of me, the sow jumped to her feet, tossing the young bears into the air.

Immediately, the sow charged. Grunting harshly, head low, she closed the gap with unbelievable speed. I remember seeing those little black, beady eyes, and the anger-like an aura around her.

I spun, looking vainly for a tree to climb. Bahnson was twenty yards up trail, so I ran toward him, yelling, It's a bear, get your spray!

Weeks before the hunt Bahnson had read about the increasing use and success of pepper spray as a bear deterrent, and had bought a small canister of a product called "Karate In A Can" (actually designed for urban use against human aggressors, not bears). He even fashioned a homemade leather belt holster to keep the spray within reach. I planned on buying a can of spray too, but, as I said later with equal parts rue and wonder at what now seems an obvious oversight, I just never got around to it.

Running from the bear, I now admit, was a total mistake. Not only does running increase the likelihood of a full-blown attack, it doesn't work. You can't outrun them. They're like missiles homing in on their targets.

But I ran toward Bahnson. Bahnson groped for his spray, which stuck in the leather holster. He dove off the trail. I jumped behind a log.

I turned around and there she was, a few feet away. I couldn't help thinking, what a beautiful, magnificent animal-silvertip, healthy, maybe 400 pounds. But that thought was quickly replaced by fear that this is really happening.

I thrust my bow at the sow and yelled, Get out of here!

She whacked the bow out of my hands with one paw, and leapt over the log. It all happened so fast. Next thing I know, I'm just seeing teeth and trying to jump out of the way. Oh God help me!

The bear lunged, biting me in the face and neck. I could feel my face ripping. Then I was on the ground, the sow on top of me. I felt her teeth crunching down on my head.

I screamed, She's got my head, she's killing me! However, my cry only intensified the attack. Then I realized, I've got to play dead or I'm going to be dead.

At that moment, I had what I now thinks of as an epiphany. When she put the head bite on me, I felt the power she had to kill me. Time just stopped then. I remember thinking, 'My time on earth is done. I'm going to miss my wife and kids. Now I'm going to meet my creator.

But with his pepper spray canister in hand, Bahnson came running toward the bear, screaming. She dropped me and lunged at Bahnson, who shot a split second blast of spray into the bear's face just as she knocked him down.

I saw Bahnson fall, thinking this is horrible, now she's getting both of us. I started squirming away like a mouse, as fast as I could. That got the bear off of Fred; she turned back to me. I saw her coming so I covered my head with my arms. Then, wham, she pounced on me like a cat on a mouse. I remember the weight of her, the incredible pressure against the ground. She started ripping at my arm, shaking it violently. I thought she was going to rip it off. I didn't feel any pain. It all happened too fast.

The sow, as we later learned, had been feeding on a nearby elk carcass, and she stunk horribly, like rotting, decaying flesh. She smelled like death.

I made myself lie still as the bear mauled me. Then she left me and turned back to Bahnson, who hit the charging grizzly approximately 10 feet away in the mouth and nose with the nearly full 4 oz. can of spray emptying it. Gasping and choking, the bear veered off into the woods, the cubs bounding after her.

He punched in 911, but the phone’s keyboard was locked.

I didn't think you could lock phones to emergency numbers. I can dial 112, 911 and 999 on mine when it's locked.

xpost

the most disturbing part of that last one is

The sow, as we later learned, had been feeding on a nearby elk carcass, and she stunk horribly, like rotting, decaying flesh. She smelled like death.

As far as utterly annihilating you and leaving no trace it's got to be the croc. People have survived bear and shark attacks but a crocodile attack is certain death unless you have people around to shoot it to death or something.

Croc Bites Girls Head Off

I didn't think you could lock phones to emergency numbers. I can dial 112, 911 and 999 on mine when it's locked.

i didn't know this, until now, when i just tried. and almost rang 999

I have a fancy that somehow I could outrun a snake. Unless it was wrapped around my leg obv.

HI DERE

12.5 mph with no legs is pretty good.

as for croc and shark,
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/telegraph/multimedia/archive/00673/crocsharknews_673465c.jpg

Anything I can stamp on/kick in the head doesn't scare me so much (even if the reality is obviously different) so snakes, spiders and scorpians aren't at all scary.

(Why the hell do I have this thread bookmarked?)

12.5 mph with no legs is pretty good.

black mambas are fast but from what I understand they won't chase you. they want to get away from you and their bites are defensive in nature.

my favorite is the spitting cobra, it will spray a 6 foot stream of venom into your eyes with great accuracy causing temporary or permanent blindness

http://dsc.discovery.com/news/2009/01/21/cobra-venom.html

lol

http://wiki.answers.com/Q/What_do_spitting_cobra_eat

A: THEY EAT SMALL CRITTERS OF LAKES AND PONDS

it is terrifying that apparently you cannot even outrun a grizzly bear on a racing bike (maybe cutty could tho?)

watch out. bears have been training.

http://ecx.images-amazon.com/images/I/51uVh5xMa0L._SS500_.jpg

Automatic thread bump. This poll is closing tomorrow.

Automatic thread bump. This poll's results are now in.

http://i198.photobucket.com/albums/aa85/work_sucks/pic-shark-guad2big.jpg

Come on! Sharks can't follow you onto dry land. Alligators will chase you down.

Pfft, it's a fix!

I don't believe that I just looked up the Wikipedia entry for Care Bears...

http://www1.istockphoto.com/file_thumbview_approve/952583/2/istockphoto_952583_crying_lion.jpg

http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_THJ_mo9A8P8/SYuysXDvrmI/AAAAAAAAA0s/HtXV0kbnjYE/s320/thumb-sad_tiger.jpg

SadGilaMonster.jpeg

Gustave the giant crocodile was robbed: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gustave_(crocodile)

According to a park ranger, Gustave has even killed and eaten an adult hippopotamus

Also this:

http://imgs.sfgate.com/c/pictures/2007/04/13/mn_croc_attack_xtpe801.jpgg

Damn. That should have been a pic of a croc with a severed human arm in it's mouth.

you mean this?
http://imgs.sfgate.com/c/pictures/2007/04/13/mn_croc_attack_xtpe801.jpg

That is one happy crocodile.

nothin' is more satisfying than the first severed human arm of the day after you wake up

HOW DID I MISS THIS THREAD

anyhow: met a girl from AK whose next door neighbors went on a camping trip (the whole fam). THE ENTIRE FAMILY WAS EATEN BY BEARS

that is a true story, by the way

!!!!

omg don't go camping, sunny!

dudes i love alaska so much but this bear situation has me reevaluting

also i camp in 5 star hotels

because im a wuss

oh is AK alaska? i read it as arkansas.

xps lol

i have never been to AK :(

This is an excellent National Geographic article about Gustave the giant croc: A cold-blooded serial killer is on the loose. His name is Gustave. He's 20 feet long, weighs 2,000 pounds, and stands accused of devouring hundreds of people. Writer Michael McRae and photographer Bobby Model travel to war-torn Burundi to confront the man-eater..

Gustave is a badass

I wish Pixar would make a reboot, CGI version of Jaws.

Reading about stonefish freaked me out as a kid. Not that they look all that terrible and they won't attack you, but the incredible amount of pain involved is just terrifying.

I wish Pixar would make a reboot, CGI version of Jaws.

― Daniel, Esq., Sunday, 5 April 2009 23:27 (Yesterday) Bookmark

Joke right?

Nope. Not a kids movie, obv.

i would like to see a spoof episode of Go Fishing where Quint goes for a day fishing with 'laughing' John Wilson

http://static.guim.co.uk/sys-images/Guardian/Pix/pictures/2009/4/12/1239531064040/Polar-bear-attack-A-woman-004.jpg

http://i5.photobucket.com/albums/y176/edwardiii/cobain_bear.jpg

This little fella would kill all of the above

holy smokes, what a trooper

Yeah, fuckin little battler, innit.

ok, that Cobain/Bear thing has made my day

omg i want an army of honey badgers

just huge weasels aren't they, badgers. kill all the time.

total badgeass

http://www.fishing-worldrecords.com/relaunch/icons2/images/goonch%20record.jpg

The goonch. Likes da humnans, also has the best name.

will this thread ever end?
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/world/africa/7999909.stm
i hope not!

"We are still seriously looking for the snake," said Supt Katam. "We want to arrest the snake because any one of us could fall a victim."

OFFICER, ARREST THAT SNAKE

SNAKES IN A JAIL

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