Boy wakes up with "girl parts", gets period, tells the internet all about it . . .

So Tampax have a new viral marketing campaign that's well . . . really strange? interesting? ridiculous? . . . I honestly don't know what to about this yet but figure you fine folks probably will.

http://zack16.com/

tampax should stay away from viral marketing iirc

Zack is also tweeting *cringe @ the v.* about his newly formed ladybits.

http://twitter.com/ZackJohnson16

"Still in possession of girl parts "down under." No, not Australia. "

what a world we live in

think i went to that kids school

what in jesus name

I'm sure the o_Oness of the advert is gonna be more than eclipsed by the enlightened reaction of Internet boymen.

Okay that's so retarded that I hope the mastermind of that campaign dies in a blazing inferno.

i blame katy perry

He looks like one of The Kooks, so not having a cock while simultaneously behaving like one kind of fits...

x-post ^^ This is what I am inclined to think as well, btw.

Still reading before forming more thoughts . . .

so i guess boypussy is actually appropriate here

wait - I meant that I feel similarly to Laurel

please the term is mangina

xp to gbx

^^^ interesting concept for a remake of "Manimal"

Apparently having a vagina makes you also want to BAKE A CAKE and creates a preference for "English costume dramas". Fuck all those people who worked on this retarded idea.

but how?

let me guess this does not involve him finally having sex with a bunch of his friends or anything

new economy mangina follies

cronenberg afterschool special on date rape

Apparently having a vagina makes you also want to BAKE A CAKE and creates a preference for "English costume dramas". Fuck all those people who worked on this retarded idea.

― But not someone who should be dead anyway (Laurel), Tuesday, June 16, 2009 12:33 PM (3 minutes ago) Bookmark

Laurel - I KNOW. It's . . . GAH!!!!!!!!!!

HEY THE 90s CALLED, THEY WANT THEIR WEBSITE BACK

but u can keep their vagina

Does this mean there's a girl's site & twitter somewhere who woke up with a richard some day and is blogging about it too?

"took a bubble bath, lit an almond biscotti scented candle."

"why hasn't he called"

"Can a warm portable PC (sitting on your lap for extended period of time) give a guy a yeast infection?"

tenured queer theory / gender studies takes its revenge upon corporate pharma in the form of a tranny tearjerker directed ala emo after school special . . . .

I think I need to sit down and take a few deep breaths.

Been really getting into salads recently and not just for the bacon bits. Is that weird?

HIS VAGINA IS MAKING HIM CRAVE SALAD.

tranjerker

suddenly i find math hard! lol amirite ladies? OH GOD WHAT AM I SAYING. l8r. buy tampax.

can't wait until he discovers the g-spot

That blog is making him look fat.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h0313RwYnAQ

Hey guys we're all sitting around talking about this campaign and I just went out and bought a pallet of Tampax and baked a cake full of salad so guess what this shit works no matter how repulsive it is to the thinking man and woman

PS I stuck the Tampax in my salad cake and lit them like birthday candles

That blog is making him look fat.

wait til you see him screaming on the bathroom floor, covered in menstrual blood

PPS the medium is the message

pallet of Tampax = potential winner of next year's Turner Prize

Does this mean there's a girl's site & twitter somewhere who woke up with a richard some day and is blogging about it too?

bitches aint twit

but balls and dick

Before I even clicked on that thread, I had a feeling it was going to include some sort of ink-on-dirty-paper figure drawing of a cityscape or the outside of a brownstone or something ala Bright Eyes, Flight of the Conchords, that new Dave Eggars movie.

that link, whatevs

must have been your feminine intuition

tenured queer theory / gender studies takes its revenge upon corporate pharma in the form of a tranny tearjerker directed ala emo after school special . . . .

I think I need to sit down and take a few deep breaths.

― Neotropical pygmy squirrel, Tuesday, June 16, 2009 12:44 PM (8 minutes ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

haha i saw this and i thought of the score of queer studies phd candidates rushing to add a section to their theses

Last night, we watched another movie and baked a carrot cake. http://www.joyofbaking.com/CarrotCake.html Yummy! The movie was about a dog (Jack Russell Terrier) who accidentally jumps on a freight train and ends up 3,000 miles from home. To be reunited with his family, the dog has to make a treacherous journey across North America. On the way, he uses his martial arts skills to fight a mountain lion (yes, the dog knows judo) and while riding the rails, a hobo teaches him how to whistle. Finally, he hitches a ride with a kind-hearted trucker and is reunited with his family. It was sweet. It'd be nice if that happened to me except the dog was my wayward guy parts.

The first thing that came to mind was "WHISTLING DICK JUDO"

it'd be nice if he suddenly realized that wasn't a carrot in the cake

Grated?

Watching a cooking show this morning, I cried a little when the chef cracked the eggs. It reminded me of those cute little baby sea turtles that hatch from their shells, then waddle down the beach to the water to begin their new life only to be gulped down by a disgusting seagull. Seagulls are jerks. Kind of like the guys I eat lunch with.

Maybe the writers took that whole "men think with their dicks" saying the wrong way and are writing him as though he's lobotomized??? wtf

fwiw this is exactly what I imagine the Twilight books to be like

Okay, I still haven't clicked on the link, but the more quotes I see the more I am joining Laurel in the cult of wanting these people to die horrible deaths.

this is just like Orlando would have been if Woolf was a binge-drinking marketing major

woolf 2.0

Dear Tampax,

The Reverend is gone off the internet because of you. You never him.

wait - I meant that I feel similarly to Laurel

― Fennec fox which does grooming (ENBB), Tuesday, June 16, 2009 12:31 PM (54 minutes ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

please the term is mangina

― 鬼の手 (Edward III), Tuesday, June 16, 2009 12:32 PM (53 minutes ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

xp to gbx

― 鬼の手 (Edward III), Tuesday, June 16, 2009 12:33 PM (53 minutes ago) Bookmark

lol @ me clarifying that I wasn't proposing mangina as the proper term for laurel

man, i want a vaj now. great work tampon maker. good marketing job.

Dan, this basically is exactly what that series of books that shall not be named is like.

Dune! Sand in your va - oh wait, that's not what you mean, is it?

The shai-hulud needs his tampax pallets

I am baffled and offended by this campaign.

I had a dream like this once.

i am sure Alanis would find it ironic that IF you wake up as a boy with girl parts, the first thing that happens is getting your period. dontchathink? (haven't watched the movie though, so it might happen after a week, or 2)

the second thing that happens is that you start a blog with links to exceptionally well-shot video footage of your own life and a special page listing the "profiles" of people you know, with short quasi-professionally written bios under each one

"Viral marketing" should be punishable by, I dunno, fifty lashes sound about right? What a stupid thing, anyway.

isn't this better described as vaginal marketing

viral merkining

http://www.merkinworld.com/

let me know if/when this garbage includes clips from "Carrie."

I couldn't even read it anymore. It was that bad.

Ah, merkin life
I'm the, ah, merkin dream

Why are merkins so funny?!

let me know if/when this garbage includes clips from "Carrie."

― fistula pumping action (sarahel), Tuesday, June 16, 2009 4:43 PM (34 seconds ago) Bookmark

more like uncomfortable silence in boys locker room

followed by a tentative "... can I touch it?"

I had to buy tampons today (which you all probably didn't really want or need to know) and Tampax def didn't get my business after this piece of shit.

MAYBE THE ADS WERE MADE BY THEIR COMPETITOR IN ORDER TO REDIRECT YOUR BUSINESS. That would actually give me some hope for the world.

Awwww, I'd totally watch a Cronenberg remake of "Carrie" - retitled "Carey" but with the main character as a boy with telekinetic firestarting powers and a vagina.

viral merkining fail

MAYBE THE ADS WERE MADE BY THEIR COMPETITOR IN ORDER TO REDIRECT YOUR BUSINESS. That would actually give me some hope for the world.

― But not someone who should be dead anyway (Laurel), Tuesday, June 16, 2009 4:48 PM (26 seconds ago) Bookmark

Right? I wish.

xp ENBB - I started getting the organic ones because tampon chemicals --> cancer fearmongering stories linger in my subconscious, while simultaneously I worry about turning into the Julianne Moore character in Safe and how these fearmongering stories are regularly targeted at women. Thanks Brown MCM department, thank you for that.

Oh the dioxin stories? As far as I can tell there's no proof of that but I do understand the paranoia. I'm paranoid about tons of shit but surprisingly that's not one of them. That said, I would love to use a keeper but I have an IUD and they're not recommended for use with one another.

Did anyone else read this as "girl pants"?

a keeper

do I want to know what this is

something tells me it is neither a trapper keeper nor a highly desirable mate

x-post to admrl yep

x-post - http://www.keeper.com/

ok I'm cool with menses but I'm so not clicking that link

I swear it's not graphic at all!!!

Keeper is a menstrual cup device worn inside and emptied every like 10-12 hours or something like that. People who use them swear by them.

I keep thinking of rain barrels

INSIDE

=O

where do you think the tampons go

lalalalalalala can't hear you

http://www.mooncupsandkeepers.com/newestcup3.jpg

xp: Radical feminist collectives will occasionally have workshops in how to make your own. It's marketed as being environmentally-friendly, anti-corporate-womyn-oppressing-beauty-industry, probably somehow tied in with veganism ...

We have whole threads on the topic of menstrual alternatives. Go there. Actually, did they all get moved to TMI at some point?

Yes, this is true.

Like I said - I've never used one and they do look kind of scary even to me but people seem to really <3 them.

I love my keeper, and I'm no hippie. Or vegan.

x-post - I'm sure I've posted about cloth pads on there at some point? If you find them let me know. Will search on my own later too.

contraceptives - S&D, POX, C/D, etc.
A Female Menses Question Thread (You've Been Warned)!

(both classic, IMO)

xp Laurel - you are stronger than me.

so they're difficult to get in then

Nah, I just think the producer <--> consumer relationship shd be mutually beneficial, and the waste and expense of other products just made them not beneficial to me compared to something I paid $40 for 15 years ago and still use.

Can't wait until Zach gets pregnant, btw.

pics or it didn't happen

xp Edward: it would be vaguely similar to a reusable condom-like product that instead of quickly disposing of, you would need to take the time and empty/clean. It's less a difficulty of use issue, and more an ick factor/laziness factor thing.

Except that it's nothing like a condom, I guess that's more or less accurate.

reusable condom-like product
^^^ reminds me of this old PIF from 1988...
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2G9yyD4qrGg
(NSFW, and I'm not embedding it because the default image from the middle of the clip is Geronimo, the titular reusable condom-like product)

Tooooooo late.

whoops, sorry, that was supposed to come out as a URL link

lotta embedding going on around here

It's less a difficulty of use issue, and more an ick factor/laziness factor thing.

See, the reasons Laurel stated for using the Keeper are my reasons for using cloth pads at night which I know sounds unbelievably gross to some but I really not a squeamish person esp when it comes to bodily fluids so to me it's no big deal. Plus, they're really cute.

Yeah! Agreed! Dunno about the cute factor but everything else about them is a good idea.

LOL I meant that the ones I have are made in awesome fabric.

Cloth pads have so much less squick-factor than I imagined before I started using them. Cute/colorful = added bonus.

Notice the sudden lack on man presence on thread. LOL. I know, it's really nbd yet I have one friend who when I told her about them went white as a ghost and couldn't even stomach the idea. It's weird to me to be that grossed out by something that comes out of your own body.

a girl i know recently started selling crocheted chthulhu-shaped keeper/mooncup covers on her etsy. Which somehow encapsulates ~so many~ of my assumptions about the keeper/mooncup phenom. (and is genuinely awesome)

xp enbb: Are these like maxi pads, only cloth and washable?

Yes, exactly!

http://www.etsy.com/shop.php?user_id=105659

^^ Is the general idea.

You shouldn't buy Tampax because they don't work!!

OK so wait - am I right in assuming what the campaign is *trying* to do is to say "hey if men understood what it was like to be a woman, wouldnt things be so much better! Tampax understands!" or someting?

Trying - but failing so fucking badly I dont know what to think. This is offensive to women, transgendered people, carrot cakes and tampons.

Boy wakes up with "girl parts", gets period, tells the internet all about it . . .

so can I just boggle at this particular paragraph again

Boy wakes up with Matt3l logo where his meat & two veg should be...

Mencano.