X Factor 2009

This year's series kicks off on Saturday. Anyone watching? If only to see how many grey T-shirts Cowell has hoarded?

It's all in the news! There's an Asberger's contestant!

The auditions are in front of a Britain's (Not) Got Talent audience this year. A budget Lithuanian version of the Cheeky Girls, and Irish identical twins with Don King style hair. Andre Lloyd Webber will be sitting at home pissing himself laughing. Or alternatively taking note of possible contestants for next year's Eurofest...

watched it tonight for the first time in aeons. auditions in front of an audience wtf? what a terrible idea. for one thing it's just so constantly loud now.

Yeah it's become much more like "Britain's Got (No) Talent", with the acts polarised between "obvious favourites" and "no bloody chance". Tonight it's the fifth (and mercifully last) audition show. I wonder how long the audience have to sit there, given the "Post Office queue from Hell" crowd of auditionees outside.

I think the queue from hell only queues for the producers, who send the best and worse on to sing in front of the audience. Or, in the the case of Glasgow, on to sing for the judges and then on to sing again for them in front of an audience because they've changed their mind about the format and need to refilm everyone, and feign suprise at how good/bad they are.

fifth (and mercifully last) audition show.

No, I was wrong. There's another audition show tomorrow.

I lolled hard when Dannii said to Kylie "Selling records... this is what you do..." and then sat back resignedly.
And tomorrow... one hour of people sobbing and Louis Walsh's constipated straining face!

that welsh girl was very sweet.

Simon has more good artists in his category than the rest have between them.

My guesses:

Simon

Jamie Afro Pub Singer Geirbait Guy
Danyl Overblown Sings Out Of The Side Of His Mouth Guy
Ollie This Years' Will Young Guy

Danii

Stacey Pointy Faced Ignoring Her Kid Dagenham Shop Girl
Stacey Don't Mention I Was In S Club Juniors Girl
Lucie I Might Have Mentioned I'm From A Small Town In Wales Girl

Cheryl

Rikki I'll Cry If You Make Me Take My Hat Off Guy
Ethan This Is How I Win The Gay Vote Guy
Joseph LOL Regional Bias Guy

Louis

Kandy Rain Cash In On The Biggest Pre-Live Show Publicity Group
Miss Frank Haha Judges Know How To Put Bands Together Better Than Contestants Group
John & Edward LOL Even More Ridiculous Regional Bias Louis Is Maybe The Only Person Alive Who Will Say "I Like Them!" Group

^^^ mostly agree with this. The boys and girls categories are both completely forgettable. Over 25s: I thought that maybe Daniel Popstars might have had a better chance than Jamie Comedy Afro Wig guy, but it seems that Simon's taken a bit of a protective attitude towards him ("blah blah blah needs to be more confident in himself blah blah blah").
As for the groups, De-Tour pull off the seemingly impossible and make John & Edward look good. Harmony Hood, well at least they got a free trip to Italy. I was hoping that they'd pull something out of the bag but they blew it last night - not that they'd have got through to Louis anyway. Project A, pretty bland, I don't think there's much there and they'd run out of steam really fast if they went through to the live finals. So that leaves Kandy Rain and Miss Frank for the reasons aldo mentions. And clearly Walsh has a huge boner for J&E, despite their arrogance, sub-NKOTB stage patter, and weak vocals.

Methinks Rachel will win the whole shebang.

lols @ 'Stacey Don't Mention I Was In S Club Juniors Girl'. She should be shouting it from the rooftops, Automatic High was a tune!

(xpost) If she gets through to the final 12 then Rachel has a good chance. But I don't think that Dannii will pick her, because Rachel is "too unconventional", ie not really that unconventional at all, but far enough away from the usual girl singer template to rule her out.

The one from Project A wearing the see-through dress last night totally reminds me of Saffia from this year's Big Brother.

"you really remind me of early Boyzone"

So this then?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hr2ZKhV6eKc

Gay Vote vs Teenage Gurls Vote boys etc

10 out of 12 isn't a bad shout.

I'm happy that Rachel made it through instead of Stacey S Club, but apart from her all the real action is going to be in the Over 25's. Stacey from Dagenham might pull a Leona, but it's a long shot.

Also I know it was 100% certain that Louis was going to put hateful twunts John & Edward through, but RRRRRRRRRRRRRRAAAAAGGGGHHH!!! I predict that they're going to be the X Factor equivelent of radioactive waste and end up in the final four.

John & Edward are fucking awesome, like Eraserhead made into gaypopporn.

On GMTV, the "fairly good" singer, ousted presumably because Simon already has Leona and Alexandra, so can't do much with yet another black girl singer.

She said about having another go next year, but she really should just get on with it now.

I haven't watched GMTV in ages, but fuck me, Russell Grant and Dr. Hilary are still working in TV?

http://www.facebook.com/group.php?gid=142546471670

Nicole needs to start recording some tracks rather than wait for someone like Cowell to come along. But if any of them had any real organisational skills they wouldn't need to audition for X Factor in the first place.

(xpost) bwahahahahahaha
http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/thumb/6/62/Eraserheadposter.jpg/200px-Eraserheadposter.jpg

Well, get 'seen', for sure...

two hour show tonight with the elimination in an hour long show tomorrow? I do not have nearly that much care in me. Fuck em.

They could chop half an hour at least off the running time if they stopped playing the Old Spice theme every three minutes.
Rihanna Rachel did pretty well with the opener.

boos for John & Edward before they've even performed? Broken Britain at its worst. :'(

Broken Britain would be J&E going through to next week after the England result tonight, which no-one could see live.

that was Office-esque in terms of televised embarrassment. Although the rock guy is pretty bad for that too, which no one seems to have noticed.

J&E was awful for a school talent concert, never mind X Factor. There's something about Jamie that I dislike, something about his personality, but I can't put my finger on it. The feeling that he would shit on anyone to win, totally screw people over to get what he wants.
Joe didn't really get much of a handle on the lyrics, but he's young. He has a great vocal range though.

erm, well that was awkward.

but the performance was pretty good. Him winning does seem kind of inevitable, unless he falls apart.

Did Danni just say (in essence) "Don't vote for the poof"?

Dannii heavily implied that he was gay, although why she said that I don't know, because even if he is, it's irrelevant. I wonder what it is with every TV contest almost needing to have some kind of controversy/total foot-in-mouth moment recently? Like with Du Beke on Strictly.
Walsh is the only member of the panel who isn't going to get chewed out by Cowell tonight. However Danyl comes over a really egotistical and unlikeable.

Although admitedly he is safe for the time being, but I think that he's a one trick pony and the public will get tired of him. I would almost prefer John & Edward over Danyl.

Actually I would prefer J&E over Danyl. Oh shoot me now...

OK, this is going to blow up bigtime...

also, THERE ARE NO GENDER REFERENCES IN "AND I'M TELLING YOU I'M NOT GOING" !!!

Mark G:

And I am telling you
I'm not going.
You're the best man I'll ever know,
There's no way I can ever go.

Gately blubathon tonight then? Plus Dannii said on twitter that she's going to apologise for last night.

Louis has pulled out, so he won't be leading whatever they do about Gateley.

that "i'm telling you..." thing is so weird. it's not even a song it's like 3 minutes of shouting and crescendo.

i think danni has more to aplolgise for referring to louis as "miss walsh" throughout the show rather than the outing of the danyl.

An 11 year girl won America's Got Talent with "I AAAAM TELLING YOUUUU!!!!!!!!!!!" a few years ago.

I guess after Stephen Gately, this has kind of been small beer.

I still was somewhat shocked by it, but there you go.

Simon's mecha-tribute was v. odd. Not the slightest bit of emotion, dismissive 'the show must go on' comment, &c &c.

Good work Robbie Williams, being completely off his face on live TV a couple of days after 'I was 24 hours from druggy death' confessionals.

http://newsvote.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/entertainment/8307576.stm

Complaints made over Dannii jibes

Almost 4,000 complaints have been made to media watchdog Ofcom over Dannii Minogue's comments about a contestant's sexuality during Saturday's X Factor.

Ofcom said despite receiving 3,885 complaints from viewers, "they are not currently investigating the matter".

In Sunday night's show, the judge apologised about the remarks.

Danyl Johnson changed a line of a song to refer to a woman instead of a man, but Minogue joked he had not needed to change the gender.

For those of you who either didn't see J&E's performance tonight, or alternatively saw it and wondered if you were imagining it...
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ye560UIYgQc

I am almost sure I want them to stay in now, as they're very nearly entertainingly bad.

can't sing, can't dance, no charisma, taking the piss, next no.1 then?

I absolutely want them to stay in the contest longer than Jamie and especially Danyl. He's going to make that annoying eyes-closed-mouth-open face at the end of every song he sings.

it was genuinely mindblowing. I was glad to have my "worst thing I've ever seen" thoughts confirmed by Simon Cowell, until I remembered that he was Simon Cowell.

can't sing, can't dance, no charisma, taking the piss, next no.1 then?

You mean, "you can't sing, you can't play, you look awful... you'll go a long way."

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q4VbSbNJWso

OK, I made it to 53 seconds of those John & Edward chaps before I had to turn it off. Do I win a medal? That is the first 53 seconds of the X Factor I have seen this year, please PLEASE tell me that's not the general standard? Even the much-maligned MacDonald Brothers on the last X Factor I actually watched through could at least carry a tune.

I see from upthread they are Louis' proteges. I take it is what happens when your mentor is AWOL.

No-one else this year is as bad as J&E. The other acts are competant but boring. Danyl obviously being positioned by Cowell to be the WINNAR!!! with Stacey as 2nd place.

They are the only contestants that are actually BAD, but the standard is pretty poor this year outside of maybe the top 4 or 5 (Jamie, Miss Frank, Stacey, Joe, Danyl maybe?). Lucie was a real let-down this week, have never liked Rachel, rest don't grab me.

Ow, Cheryl, my ears, my eyes! I just turned over because I wanted the other half to witness those weird twin blokes, and I didn't actually know if that was Cheryl or a really bad contestant.

honestly the worst thing about cheryl's voice isn't even that it's hideous so much as totally nondescript. i still don't feel i know what her singing voice is even like. of course a fucking boring song like that doesn't help.

simon, shut up~~

Haha, OMG, in the ad break, I decided to just watch the YouTube of Jonathan & Edward. I hadn't made it past the first minute before, so OMG OMG OMG the talking bit! OMG! The uncoordinated leaping! The actual, very real, horror! Major lolz at the judges though.

Whitney = carcrash.

Better than Cheryl though

hot mess! but yeah, better than cheryl and lovely to see her happy.

Better singer and performer than Cheryl, but, y'know, stop talking! You can't do it!

I am worried that all this means I'm now hooked into the X Factor again :-(

did Dermot just say "11 remaining housemate"?

whitney's interview was a bit "kooky", by which i mean "cracked out"

J&E return to bring the pain next week! oh dear...

Dear GBP,

You are mental.

Love, everyone with ears.

I think it's hilarious. As long as Rachel keeps it together for her performance, Ricky and his hat should go.

First time seeing either of them, Rachel sounds like she'd be better at a better song. Ricky is a Tesco Value Leon Jackson.

Next week is big band week, at least we're spared Ricky making a soapy tasting Value Baked Beans mess of "Mack The Knife"

I love big band week, and I'm out next week, so I'll have to record this AND strictly. I so didn't want to be a slave to reality TV this year :-(

thank god that creep's gone

did Dermot just say "11 remaining housemates"?

― a gift from your mind in the form of the perfect beat (snoball), Sunday, October 18, 2009 7:35 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

Yes, he did.

Also, I'm stating that Harry Hill will mention Whitney Houston's appearance with Mike Reid, on next weeks "TV Burp"

Rachel struggling to engage the audience, basically.

Then again, singing "your favourite song ever - Flying without wings" = 'I'm a very normal singer'

The other thing: Rachel reminded me of someone I couldn't place until I did:

Adeeva.

Who had a big hit. With "Respect"

http://www.mattscdsingles.com/acatalog/15007.jpg

this is becoming quite hard to predict. i guess rachel will go this week but who will be the one that is saved?

Joe or Lloyd, I'm assuming.

The bottom two might be Rachel and either Lloyd or Lucie. But that would be really unfair on Rachel - I can't even understand how she's been in the bottom two twice already - so I think the judges will save her again.

(xpost) Joe's performance last night was a bit weak, but I reckon that he's got this year's Eoghan/Eowok vote and is safe for now.

I think Rachel's performance, and the judges comments, will make people vote for her this time.

uh that Westlife performance needed more lasers...

Broon Jobby next week as part of 'Rock Week'? When J&E are clearly doing 'Goody Two Shoes' by Adam Ant?

Best bit of tonight's show was Bublé's particularly weird walk when he came on to sing his song.

http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_2OcEpSGAKSE/StDwOpUTvlI/AAAAAAAAAVs/B8hml2kZiAg/s1600-h/J%26E+copy.jpg
http://insider-outsider-art.blogspot.com/2009/10/john-and-edward-remain-kings-of.html

Shocked at Danyl having trouble getting votes; he's the only one who looks the full package. Is it just that people think he's cocky / arrogant? Feel sorry for Miss Frank that dross like Lloyd and Stacey are still in.

why are the fucking twins still in????? fuck you, britain, useless fucking country

I'm disappointed with J&E this week. Big Band week is often a disaster for most of the acts - Olly came off as a grinning twit - but for the twins it was really a chance to show that there was another side to them. But like Same Difference, they're really a one dimensional act. Next week they'll be performing like a BBC3 comedy show parody of themselves.

(xpost) Danyl is cocky and arrogant. Also every song he sings ends on a big long high note with his mouth open like a windsock. Miss Frank shouldn't have been in the bottom two.
I wonder what it is that seems to make the GBP hate girl groups? They're at least as good as JLS - for a start, all three of them can sing. Lloyd (whose hangdog expression makes him looks like a Barnardo's advert) should have gone but he's probably benefiting from the Eoghan Effect even more than Joe. I think that Stacey is going to be in the final three and has a very good chance of winning.

i think Olly will win in a Stacey/Afro/Olly final. i was delighted that Danyl was in the bottom two and wish he had gone, he gives me the creeps. next week hopefully. Joe is horribly bland, i can't believe the praise he gets week after week.

If Danyl goes next week, Simon will reckon that it had a lot to do with Danni's "lol you are teh gay" comment, and she won't be judging/mentoring next year.

Joe is bland, but he's a nice person, and that's something which is essentially unteachable, particularly within the timescale of a TV series. Danyl is difficult because he's arrogant, Jamie isn't so much arrogant as stubborn. Neither will be in the final three. Incidentally this is why the production crew - particularly the choreographer - rep so hard for J&E, because by all accounts they are nice guys to work with.

I think after his first audition, Danyl just assumed he was going to walk the rest of the show, and Simon probably did too. If the audience suspect that, they're not going to vote for him.

being bottom two this early could be a good thing for him, giving him plenty of time for I Have Seen The Error Of My Ways redemption.

My friends have ruined this season for me by scheduling a run of Sunday evening dinner parties that make me miss the results show, but I'm kinda pleased because I don't really like anyone and resent spending three and a half hours a week on something I'm not too bothered about.

Danyl is the one I hate the most - can't hold the original tune, and the one he invents sounds like a kid coming up with a melody. I thought his audition performance was also pretty bad.

Miss Frank where my favorite act and I was almost annoyed they were voted off, but then I remembered this is X Factor, and almost everyone voting has no sense of taste. Not sure if any of the others have anything interesting about them in the slightest - but at the end of the day the show isn't really made for me, the only reason I watch it is because it's the only music show on telly these days.

WTF was up with Rachel's Stacey impersonation in the post-performace chat? The longer it went on, the more exaggerated it became.

yeah that was a bit weird but i think it's a case of her doing an unintentional impersonation of stacey just because they've been together a lot and she's absorbed some of her mannerisms and speech patterns. that happens with young girls i suppose.

So, with Simon briefing against J-Edward (Needs an Oliver after that, RM fans!)....

.. as being the potential death of X-Factor, is it all a downhill buggy ride to a win for the twins, along with the variety show and the biggest rise and fall since Bros?

http://images.mirror.co.uk/upl/m4/oct2009/6/6/image-5-for-x-factor-contestants-out-and-about-gallery-944275053.jpg

+

http://media.mjsbigblog.org/wp-content/uploads/2009/09/olly-x.jpg

=

http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_XsVALQtGIZM/RmFBmdZ8uSI/AAAAAAAABQc/WTZS2ddZjt8/s400/J+Edward+Oliver.jpg

Jedward (seems to be what the media are calling them now) won't win. They will get into the final four though.

Picked up a copy The Mirror on the bus the other day (didn't want anyone thinking I supported the industry I work in) and they claimed that "Jedward" got the highest public votes last week, which is amusing, even if it isn't true.

Seriously, wtf is Cheryl wearing?

(also lol@ singing woman saying Lucie had to find notes that "we never thought she'd reach" - so is rock harder than sub-Mariah twittering?)

Wow, Danyl's first verse was so far out of key it was incredible. Can't see him surviving.

Another one of those stupid wide open mouth big notes, completely out of nowhere and utterly inappropriate.

This Lloyd performance is full of wtf. Bottom 2?

Stretching the definition of "rock" just a bit there. And what is it with everyone singing out of tune?

Coldplay? This is the week when I go wtf about every performance, obviously.

Oh no, wait, it's Keane. Which either raises or lowers the levels of wtf.

I never thought I'd say the words "Not as good as Bobby Gillespie's version" ...

Cheryl's wearing surrealistic wheels, but her hair looks good.

Cheryl's outfit is the worst thing I've seen on telly tonight, and I've been watching Strictly.

I also saw Dennis Taylor on Hole in the Wall, and I still think Cheryl's outfit is worse.

haha OMG Jedward FTW

(and yes, I know I am on the Strictly thread getting cross at idiots ensuring that crap people are being kept in, but this is different)

No, really, the joke has gone far enough.

Why? Anyone decent will still sell records. If Jedward win, not one person will willlingly part with money to voluntarily listen to them.

As long as Danyl, Lloyd, and Jamie are still in the competition, I can stand J&E being there as well. Once those three have gone, then yes, the twins have to go.

Because, sad as it sounds, I actually like the show for what it's supposed to be, not the pantomime.

xpost

J&E: They Are The Cheeky Boys.

Why did no one mention that Danyl sang the first half of his track is a completely different key from the backing? He is pretty bad.

Danyl was pretty awful, yes. Jedward, on the other hand, got actual lols from me when they came in too early on the chorus. Although I've certainly had enough of them by now.

Alright, for the second time this weekend (first being Strictly), I find myself thinking Britain, you craaaaaaazzzzzzzzzy...

britain you raaaaaccciiiiiiist more like

such a fucking joke that someone so obviously superior to half the remaining contestants has been voted off

Sometimes I think it's racism but then look who won the last 2 series so I'm not so sure. More to the point: why bother having a jury system if Cowell is going to chicken out of making the obvious decision every week?

Didn't watch tonight, but I watched last night, and, OK, that is just insane.

yeah why bother having a sing off if it isn't going to matter anyway? I think I might start supporting Jedward because Cowell keeps pissing me off with "it's about talent, it's about singing" spiel when clearly it's not.

Yeah was saying to Mrs V tonight there's a big whirlpool of irony in Cowell's rockist approach to the show.

I think it was because as I've said: The past two winners havebeen black and female, and neither Simon or the GBP want another one.

JEdward now have the whole country behind them by actually being entertaining and 'sympathetic', things which SameDiff and the scottish brothers (forget name) didn't have so much of.

Will they be forced to resign a'la JSeargant?

Leona won in 2006 - the last two winners haven't been black and female.

er, Alexandra Burke isn't black or female???

I guess the statement is that she is only one black female person...

Anyway...

Sorry, terribly put. I meant haven't both been. Although who remembers Leon Jackson anyway etc.

Point being: Simon has two Black Female winners, and he has to do the work to produce and A&R them in different ways (and yes, Simon Cowell, you *do* work for them, not the other way round, right? OK, back in..)

Whereas the eventual winner has to have some style. Something to hang something on.

My guess is that Simon was being *nice* to Cheryl in not eliminating her lad (Didn't see the voting this week, I assume it wasn't unanimous (excluding the mentor's vote)..

(or, indeed, more to the point, putting Danii's ones out whenever possible because of DanylOuting..)

wow, first time i've watched a whole edition this year and it's a REALLY poor lot this year :o

i had thought the general standard was higher this year, without there being anyone with breakthrough potential, but tonight and last week were extremely poor.

i mean, i like olly well enough but only as a w/ smash.

"The song this week is from a film called Gummo" was pretty wtf?

"The song this week 'Mom's And Dad's Pussy' by Destroy All Monsters is from a film called Gummo"

"The song this week 'Skin Peeler' by Mortician is from a film called Gummo"

Jedward about to leave the building.

Gummo's not a film! Louis' never heard of it, ergo it is not a film.

Except that hypocritical douchebag Cowell just kept them in.

Noodle, we've had our disagreements in the past but what. A. Cunt. Why didn't he just punch her in the face and be done by it?

haha, what? (I am not watching)

Cowell went to the public vote for the 3rd week running? rather than do the obvious and put Jedward to sleep. Lucy went out instead.

John & Edward vs Lucie in the sing off, Cowell forces a deadlock, Lucie goes.

haha, OK, that's nuts.

They might offend the finely-tuned aesthetic sensibility that brought the world Robson & Jerome but he knows better than to get rid of this series' main news story this early.

Each year there is a catastrophically bad act that somehow manages to hoover up many of the better acts. With typical idiocy the public actually seem to start rallying around the bad act in that daft supporting-a-loser way. But this year Cowell's shameless hijacking of the show for ratings etc had been particularly nasty. If only the public would stop voting/watching.

had=has

The Xtra Factor or whatever it's called on ITV2 now full of furious punters phoning in to berate Cowell. Which I'm sure is what he wanted.

(xxxpost) I think that if Cowell's kept the twins in for the sake of ratings, then he's made a mistake. First off, they'll probably be voted off next week - that was Big Brother strength boo-ing from the audience tonight. Second, if Jedward had gone, then Louis wouldn't have had any acts left, and previous series have shown that he gets super bitchy when that happens. Which would have made the show far more watchable.

(xpost) Isn't it a premium rate line to call in? He probably doesn't care what people say as long as they're paying him money to say it.

re: ratings, I'm pretty sure that hated characters are bigger audience magnets than nice ones as far as reality shows are concerned.

ughhhhhhhhhhhhh i hate...everyone so much.

i don't even like lucie but what a farce that was

lloyd and joe are probably even worse than the twins though - they can't sing much better and don't have any of the ahem "entertainment" value, ehy the fuck are they still in?

Hate Jamie and don't think he can sing tbh.

Lloyd gets called Chad Dylan Cooper in our house, because he is so shit.

http://www.virginmedia.com/images/Lloyd-Daniels-x-factor-290x.jpg http://i221.photobucket.com/albums/dd161/JBnow/chaddylan.gif

L-R: Chad, Lloyd

let's be real, they're all shit. the only one left i have active fondness for is stacey.

i don't imagine the winner, whoever it is, will be flown out to america to work with ne-yo and flo rida.

There comes a point when the story stops being funny and starts just getting on people's tits. I thought losing Rachel last week would have been the tipping point (like on Strictly when Craig Kelly staying in was hilarious until Zoe Lucker went out and everyone went "woah, that joke's overplayed now"). I suppose the difference in the X Factor though is that basically they're all rubbish.

I actually think Lucie Lavigne was growing the most of all the contestants. She's looked like a confident young pop star in the group thing at the start of the Sunday show. Really bored with Jedward now.

Joe can sing, Lex. Lloyd can't. At all.

I love Stacey but it really is time she has a performance as great as her auditions.

A farce and it's messed up Jedward's chances of a long term career. If they'd gone tonight, they might have been cast in a panto, released a crap Christmas single, and annoyed us on TV for a couple of years. Now there'll be a massive backlash, they'll go next week, and no-one will touch them, not even with radioactive material handling waldos.

Dude, this is Britain. Somebody will sign them, whatever happens.

they might have been cast in a panto, released a crap Christmas single, and annoyed us on TV for a couple of years

pretty sure the first two, at least, will still happen :(

this fucking country :(

joe sings almost well enough to be in the chorus line of a west end musical, but he's so WET. why do british teenage girls like pathetic, weedy boys so much :(

this fucking country :(

can't decide who's more punchable out of olly, danyl, the twins, lloyd, joe, the pub rocker or simon cowell.

Is it teenage girls voting for Joe? My prejudice points the finger at the over 50s.

Jedward will make plenty out of this show, whichever week they leave.

Ah, Shakira on the show next week. That's more like it.

(xpost) plenty of envelopes full of excrement

I mean, it's not their fault - they were clearly all psyched up and ready to be told that they were going (which possibly had the side effect that they sang sort-of-in-tune and sort-of-in-time). But the only way they're redeem themselves next week is to single "Pretty Vacant".

John and Edward's style really reminds me of PJ and Duncan, I bet they could do a wicked version of 'Let's Get Ready To Rumble'.

Or Rhumble rather.

I don't think that Jedward could dance as well as this...
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m_sJmIQrH54

I wd like to shoot one of them in the face with a paintball tho.

Doesn't have to be a paintball tbh

Yeah, I probably would bother taking the paint out of the tin tbh, just cuff 'em with that.

on the annoyance scale the twins are waaaaaay beneath a) cowell's constant fuckery, b) the public who keep voting them in. I HATE THE PUBLIC.

Yeah, as Alba said above, I was just getting to see the point of Lucy Morisette...

i think Lloyd has the best and most interesting voice of all the contestants. i'm not trying to be contrary, i like the way he sings!

! what do you like about it? Have we just not seen him with the right material, jed?

What would screw up John and Edward?

The announcement that "Song to the Siren" will be the winner's Xmas single.

My only hope now is that Joe gets restyled and edged into Robyn/La Roux type musical direction or something dark and interesting (well, anything that moves AWAAAAY from the West End thing).

(xpost) They'd have to use air raid sirens.

Only Stacey really has any chance of pulling off "Song to the Siren", the other six finalists will all make complete train wrecks of it.

can you vote for the choir? i would like to do that, please.

god i fucking hate queen, worst band ever

Oh you horrible, horrible fuckers.

I gotta admit that that was something.

Surely you can appreciate "Somebody to Love" or "Under Pressure" lex?

That Jedward performance was really good.

Don't make me SB you man, I'm just angried up enough by that to do it.

Did anybody see Edward slip as they came out onto the stage? I thought he was going face down for a second.

They still won't win, but they brought some excitement to this week's show, which apart from Stacey, has been stale and cheesy performances.

Did anybody see Edward slip

I can't actually remember which is which, but yeah, I saw it. The funny thing is that they're such clumsy and awkward dancers, and on top of that they can't sing in time with each other. But because they're identical twins everyone assumes that they should be able to, so they keep being given songs and routines that just end up highlighting their ineptitude.

I don't know which is which either I just assume they always line up left to right, Ant and Dec style.

If you want irritating, how about that Danyl performance? "Eeeeeeyyoooooreee et champignons" I hate the way he's being pushed as the winner - given last place, a huge backing choir.

It's just a poor bunch this year, the ones that can sing at all, like Joe, have some other serious flaw, like being ridiculously cheesy. And half of them straight can't sing.

Also "We Are the Champions" is a bit of a shit song rilly.

Mercury referred to "We Are The Champions" in an interview as "the most arrogant and egotistical song I've ever written" - so I guess it fits Danyl to a tee.

Jamie is a pub singer, really reminds me of a bad Michael Hutchence impersonator. And his Toploader haircut - this week with added poodle - really doesn't help.
Lloyd sounded better this week, but he's still swamped by the songs and the backing singers.
Olly somehow manages to combine the most irritating parts of Will Young and Robbie Williams, but crappier.
Joe is a nice kid, but as lex mentioned upthread, he's the member of the backing chorus in a West End musical, not a lead singer right now. Although I laughed when he said "me mam absolutely loves Queen" because ha LOL Queen you old.
J&E I've already mentioned.
Stacey clearly will win this, unless the GBP are mad oh wait...
Danyl, aside from the arrogance, the thing I really dislike about him is how he ignores the tune and makes up his own. But nothing's going to stop him doing that, since not even Whitney staring him down while saying "sing my song the way it was bloody written, you arse" didn't.

the backing and the crowd are so loud this year, something up with the sound balance on the show or are they deliberately trying to disguise the crap singing?

Was the Calvin Harris pineapple-on-head stage invasion during Jedward caught on camera? Heard about it on Twitter but couldn't be arsed to rewind.

(xpost) The way that the backing volume - particularly choirs and backing singers - seems to increase at certain dodgy moments in the performances suggests the latter.

(xpost) yes it was Calvin Harris.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VSVH1B0qUhI
I can't decide if this is genius or desperation.

i think the latter

Yeah on reflection I think so too - the dada-ness of the pineapple confused me for a moment.

I mean, if you're going to run on stage during J&E's performance, why not something more appropriate like a bucket of shite?

the backing and the crowd are so loud this year

i've been thinking this too, and was wondering whether it was just me.

i honestly loathe everyone involved now, including the hysterically loud crowd, apart from poor mistreated dannii and ok-ish stacey. everyone else needs several punches in the jaw, especially the fucking retarded shrieking crowd who i swear start screaming whenever anyone so much as breathes.

as bad as all of them are, fucking queen are still worse. "radio gaga, radio googoo" - how the FUCK was a chorus like that ever acceptable in this stupid fucking country. I HATE YOU ALL. HATE. HATE. HATE. HATE. HATE.

i actually hate the entire concept of pop music these days. THANK YOU 2009! this was truly the year when pop music died.

paris hilton's album >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> any of these muthafuckAS

Surely you can appreciate "Somebody to Love" or "Under Pressure" lex?

no, and only when vanilla ice does it, and tbh not even then

have you seen the footage from JLS at Birmingham?
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/england/west_midlands/8360560.stm
60 ppl injured.

thousands broke through a fence to get in and loads got crushed. One of them really badly injured.

Not a big Queen fan, but thought last night's performances were the strongest set I can remember. Only Jamie was bad. Even Lloyd was quite good.

Oh, I didn't think much of Danyl's WATC either, but the judges didn't seem to agree.

Danyl's quite often the last or penultimate performer on the show. same with Joe. Lloyd and Jamie have been first or second on rather a lot too. they are clearly lining Jamie and Lloyd for the chop this week by putting them on early.

still liking Lloyd's voice quite a lot.

have you seen the footage from JLS at Birmingham?
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/england/west_midlands/8360560.stm
60 ppl injured.

My friend's younger brother was there. He posted this on facebook yesterday:

"just got back from the BRMB disaster! I made us leave after 10 minutes when 20,000 were pushing to get through and people started climbing the walls. "It'll be like Hillsborough, let's go..." and it nearly was! Worst organised event I've ever known!"

wow this jedward performance is the lamest thing i've seen on tv for a while (having not watched any of this previously) - surprised this equates 'great performance' to people other than some kind of 'it doesn't how bad you are because our capability to discern when it comes to entertainment quality is actually worse' reasoning

one of the twins stumbled a bit as they crashed thru that sheet of tin foil at the start, i guess that sums it up. calvin harris also summing himself up fairly well.

Well "great performance" is relative - compared to most of Jedward's previous performances (particularly the budget Ghostbusters thing last week) and also the performances of the other contestants. Comparing any of the finalists against real actual pop stars and they all come off badly. For example, Shakira's on tonight's show, and even if she's mediocre she'll still blow them out of the water.

lol a cracked-out whitney blew everyone out of the water

rihanna next week will be immense

Has anyone else noticed that one of Jedward is much better than the other one? His moves are better and sometimes you see him shoving the other one. OK, I can't be certain it's always the same one, but it would be weird if they switched about in competence and confidence like that.

pretty sure the good one is just CGI

That Boho Rhapso was seriously the worst shit I've ever heard.

Bohemian Crapsody more like... And Queen (or half of them anyway) turning up halfway through to make things even worse.

I think Brian May is the only person I've ever seen make playing the guitar look uncool.

http://news.bbc.co.uk/olmedia/1855000/images/_1855939_tony_pa.jpg

http://www.maniacworld.com/Monster-Sized-Flying-V-Guitar.jpg

I didn't know that Billy Joel could play guitar...

Very glad that Jamie's gone.

yep

Jedward will be doing Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go, right?

wrong, oops

They are some sort of prank to see how stupid the GBP are, right? Right?

that was totally appalling

The choreographer keeps giving them these complex routines, but they are just so uncoordinated.

The routines aren't actually complex, unless you are completely uncoordinated and have no sense of rhythm or musicality - oh, wait...

Complex relative to their dancing ability, which is practically nil. And it's made worse because they don't even dance same wrong steps at the same time.

Careless Bellow

Danyl's singing a totally different tune. Why the extended note on "all"? Actually he should have sung "A Different Corner" and changed the lyrics to "A Different Tune". LOL at the audience clapping on the off beat...

I wonder if GM is at home watching this with a big spliff in his hand?

http://www.amuseline.com/wp-content/uploads/2007/01/07a_20_george_243x201.jpg

Lloyd first and Joe last again?!

Danyl is the worst. he gives me the dry rise.

(xpost) "You can't afford to smoke it if you've got anything to do (...) Not that I count this interview watching X Factor as anything to do."

Sit back and light up. Watch your songs get butchered, give a wry smile.

weird. why would you not choose a song written by George Michael on George Michael night?!

cos the british public think he wrote it cos he sang it. innit.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v165/noodle_vague/timeforsleep.jpg

L-R: Judges, Jedward

That was a piss poor performance, but OTOH I think they knew that they were going anyway and chose the song to make a point ("no matter how they attack" MASS BOO-ING). Olly's performance was ropey as well, and against anyone else he would have gone.

surprised - pleasantly so - to find that olly is not as popular as i'd thought.

how the actual fuck is lloyd so safe????

i've no idea what to make of danyl, the "worst person ever" press line seems so OTT but i've no idea if he's actually popular.

he's not so safe - he's been in the bottom two three times, i think?

am still liking Lloyd most.

re: olly, had him pegged as a potential winner at the first audition, but he seems to get worse every week somehow.

agree w/ that

Bad choice of song for Olly this week totally didn't help, the house band is far too lumpen and grooveless to do something like "Fastlove". The rest is down to his own mediocrity, obv.

Susan Boyle was kinda brilliant, tbh. Was half listening and didn't realise what song it was until just before the chorus came in and I was like "woah fuck???"

The BBC, ladies and gents:

One of the twins said: "It's been the greatest experience of my life. We're here every single weekend on live television having the greatest time of our life."

The other chipped in with: "It's, like, deadly. It's, like, so cool."

This said, I have no idea which is which either.

The accepted practice is to stand right to left inversely.

Who knows...

haha, I was going to post that on the BBC thread!

was a bit mad when dannii had the deciding vote and she had to clarify whether it was a singing competition ie. which way am i supposed to vote here simon? and threatened to derail the thing live-on-air again. dannii not getting the memo it seems. also paloma faith=worst pop star ever. who is she mates with?

Danii is so fired, she doesn't care anymore. And hasn't for at least three weeks.

he can't fire the winning mentor can he?

assuming stacey will win in a joe/stacey face off.

I think it will be a Joe/Stacey face-off, but I think Joe will win. He may be theatre boy rather than popstar, but Cowell doesn't want another female winner. Mind you, he wont want another Leon Jackson either.

it's been obvious for a few weeks now that cowell doesn't really care about launching a leona-grade pop star on the world out of this series, and would probably rather not - with leona still having to consolidate her status and alexandra in the process of launching, plus jls doing their thing, the market is kinda flooded with x factor products at the moment. no need to add another, especially when they're as limited as everyone left is. probably explains why cowell was so unbothered about supporting rachel and lucie, who would actually merit more than a half-hearted brookstein/jackson campaign.

What the heck was up with that dog whistle note that Mariah hit last night?

yeah i was like "that sounds terrible"/"that's kind of amazing, how is that even possible?"

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Whistle_register

Jedward not going away any time soon...
Louis Walsh signs X Factor duo John and Edward

loads of Jedward t-shirts for sale from stalls on Henry Street (main shopping street on the northside of Dublin) this morning. alongside Michael Jackson memorial plates and three-packs of Calvin Klein and Hugo Boss underpants.

What is this feeling that I'm suddenly experiencing? Oh yes, SCHADENFREUDE

no one told me it was on at 7.30 and i missed lady gaga :(

She performed in a giant bath, and standing on a toilet.

Bit of a travesty of a result, really.

lex: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VaS4B_-OUm4

So, all manic for the final show?

Oh, and no mention so far of which song is to be the single?

What would screw up John and Edward?

The announcement that "Song to the Siren" will be the winner's Xmas single.

― Mark G, Monday, 9 November 2009 09:35 (4 weeks ago)

Although now it's rumoured to be "The Climb", originally sung by... Hannah Montana.

Rumours say it's that vs "Don't Stop Believing" depending on whether simon thinks Joe will win or not.

I have seen very little of it this year, but every time I glimpse any of it (such as Saturday morning while channel hopping and I stumbled across Lloyd's performance from last week) I'm struck by how awful the contestants are this year. I mean, he couldn't sing but was still one of the best 5?

didn't Joe already do Don't Stop Believing? They can't do that, can they?

I thought I had stopped caring about this season but then Olly inexplicably not being eliminated has given me a little enthusiasm.

Aye, he did it on one of the first live shows, Rock Week I think.

Didn't someone sing "Hallelujah" in the heats last year?

(I mean one of the final ten)

Only six days to go until The X Factor final weekend kicks off and Simon Cowell has just revealed what type of songs the final three acts will be singing.

On Saturday night Stacey Solomon, Olly Murs and Joe McElderry will battle it out for the winner’s title and each of them will sing a Christmas song, a celebrity duet (check out who’s rumoured to be appearing here) and their favourite song from the series.

After the first person is eliminated, the final two contestants will sing their version of the winner’s song, which is rumoured to be Miley Cyrus’s The Climb.

(oh, the 'rumoured' = Paul McCartney, George Michael, and Coldplay (Coldplay to sing with Stacey, apparently))

Apparently, Olly And Danyl didn't want "The Climb" as it only suits Joe and Stacey, so it seems to have been dropped.

Thank fuck for that, as "The Climb" is one of those horribly generic Peter Kaye "Winner's Song" things.

rofl
Men jailed for X Factor pub brawl

X Factor duets are revealed for next week’s big final
Tuesday 8 December, 2009

Robbie Williams, Michael Buble and George Michael will perform on the X Factor stage next weekend

Essex cheeky-chappy Olly Murs will duet with Robbie Williams while Joe McElderry is set to sing with George Michael and Stacey Solomon will be joined with Canadian singer Michael Buble.

Saturday will be a comeback performance to The X Factor stage for both Robbie and Buble who have both already performed on the show this year.

Beatles legend Sir Paul McCartney will also perform as well as rumours of a Beyonce and Madonna appearance on next weekend’s shows.

Each contestant will have three performances including a Christmas tune, a celebrity duet and their favourite song from the series.

The last two standing will then sing their version of the winner’s song, which is the Miley Cyrus hit, The Climb. So, get used to it, Ollie Murs!

the winner’s song, which is the Miley Cyrus hit, The Climb.

Wasn't that only out like a couple of months ago?

that pub brawl jailing won't seem so funny to me if fucking Robbie takes fucking Olly to fucking victory and I'm forced to chib the first person I see.

(xpost) released March this year.

Men jailed for X Factor pub brawl

The really stupid thing is that they were arguing about Leon Jackson. Those men probably can't even remember who the hell he is now.

Hey, Leon Jackson switched on the Christmas lights in Paisley last year! He's still got that X Factor!

This year it was Ruth Lorenzo and Lemar (fuck has he fallen a long way...)

and when one of the lights blew everyone threw themselves on the ground.
xp

And we still had enough money left over to get the Dolly Rockers to do the fireworks! Hurrah for my council tax!

Paisley's population is just a little under that of Bath, and Nicolas Cage did Bath's lights, THEREFORE etc etc.

Doesn't he have a house in Bath though? (refrains from making a baths in paisley joke)

I do believe my THEREFORE etc etc was quite decisive on the matter of Leon Jackson's fame.

I think George and Joe should be quite good, but I really doubt my ability to get through a full Robbie and Olly performance.

No-one watching then? I missed the start, but turned over to see Cheryl feigning surprise that a few kids turned up at their own school to see Joe.

OK, roving reporter cam has met some menk who has changed her name to Vote Joe by deed poll. This country, etc...

i missed the beginning also.

OK, recap section there, and Olly appears to have been singing Superstition while lying writhing on his back. It didn't seem to be having a tremendously positive effect on his voice.

Buble <<<<< ∞ <<< Beyonce

(xxxpost) roving reporter is Kimberley from Girls Aloud!

Also Jeff Brazier at a quiet night out in Dagenham...

I really really hate Olly so much. Am I being unreasonable? It sure feels like it.

No Robbie NO! STOP IT! You're making Olly look good, that's not really the point of this, is it?

This is disastrous, like a crap Robbie impersonators convention.

...even more so now that Dermot's on stage with them.

wtf at Robbie mucking up his intro, Olly looked really pissed off at that I thought... disastrous is the word

Robbie's really enjoying his drugs these days, eh.

Haha, Robbie really didn't learn from the last time he was on that being totally spangled on national telly isn't really a good look on him.

And, yes, Robbie-themed office party night out.

xposts

There's no way Joe won't win this, is there?

(xxxpost) I don't think that Olly is going to make the final two, not that I particularly want him to anyway. Disastrous would be Kylie coming on to sing with Joe like she did with Leon.

cmon George show us how it's done

Speaking of drugs, here's GM, but at least he knows to save the spliff until after the gig.

This is actually properly quite good.

it is, yes.

and, incidentally, so is George doing If I Were a Boy with Beyonce: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gS8vqgLTKvQ

It looked like a bizarre father-son talent contest. Best duet of the three by miles though.

ok that was SO much better. Their voices actually blend together really well! Although whoever did the arrangements for these left in way too much awkward standing-around-while-not-singing parts.

xposts

no, there's no way Joe won't win this. Robbie was a wtf?!

or to put it another way, Joe ftw, Robbie wtf

:D

the tiniest of split seconds of WTF there as I thought Stacey's song was Mercury Rev's The Dark is Rising.

haha, that would have been great. Louis would go fucking mental "THAT'S NOT A SONG, I'VE NEVER HEARD IT!"

lol

Jeff son, the way a microphone works is that you hold it up to your mouth when you're speaking

Olly def has something of the young brando about him.

looks-wise obv

When he gets eliminated tomorrow, he can say to Dermot "I coulda been a contender", etc.. However, good comeback after that duet with Ropey Williams.

I hate that they seem to be aiming for a rat pack-style roguishness for him when no, he's just a twat.

Although I applaud him for so brilliantly pushing my buttons, even if unintentionally.

Wait a minute, how the heck are they going to fill another 30 minutes?

Joe's head tilt sympathetic face is just incredible though - they could get hardened criminals to confess to crimes just by having him stand opposite them for a few minutes.

I can see the young Brando thing with Olly, but he also looks like Craig Phillips from Big Brother.

Filler = singing guest, plus blubbing from evicted person, innit?

Yeah for some reason I thought they were going to eliminate the 3rd placer tomorrow, but it's going to be tonight. Oh and they just played the worstest worst bit from Olly's trashing of "Superstitious".

predicting olly to be booted off tonight, joe to win tomorrow. or maybe that's just wishful thinking...

I know! I didn't see it at the time, but can only assume the rest of it was better than him skiting through people's legs on his back while trying to hold a tune.

xpost - nah, I think that's how it'll pan out as well.

God, Robbie Williams really needs someone to punch him in the face pronto. I am reminded of a wee bit that the BBC trailed the last series of Live At The Apollo with - it was basically Lee Mack saying "someone should tell Robbie Williams that this [does spot-on pecking-chicken-head strutting thing and smug-face impersonation] is not entertainment".

Hang on was that PRINCE HARRY in the audience?

Seems like it - his girlfriend is backing Stacey to win.

oh FUCK OFF

Olly through! That's Stacey out then, surely.

simon as surprised as the rest of us

stacey doesn't seem too bothered!

No, she seems quite genuinely delighted to have got this far.

actually her composure is pretty admirable. would hate to be watching olly right now if he'd lost.

Haha, yes, that's something to look forward to tomorrow.

Watching Stacey's best bits, it strikes me that she always looks better when they aren't trying to dress her as Leona.

so true

No-one? Is not very exciting so far, it must be said. Special guests: Alexandra + JLS, and Leona. Aren't we great, pat ourselves on back, well done, etc.

Joe still ftw.

ya I would've posted if I'd had anything to say. Two hours for four songs - KINDA STRETCHING IT.

I've been flicking between this and SPOTY. Have I missed the "lol let's all laugh at the audition idiots" yet, or was the appearance of Jedward in the finalists' collaboration enough?

I've been only half paying attention but I don't think they've gone for lols of that variety. Yet.

In fact, that'll be the filler while they count the votes, won't it?

Audition idiots/"rejects" (as Dermot introduced them last year) haven't been on yet. Perhaps they won't bother this year.

haha Olly sounds shite singing "The Climb" - Joe is going to waste him from a mile up.

Jesus Christ, I'd buy that fucking Rage Against The Machine song to get this not to number one. Ugh.

Did the backing tape just go wonky there?

God this is so bad. Real ear discomfort.

jls+alexandra turned out a surprising crop all things considered

maybe it's already been posted upthread, but have we all seen Olly's Deal or No Deal failure? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ouACslFYIcA

Haha, OMG, judges all cloth-eared twats. Every time one of them says "I've never heard you sing like that", I expect them to follow up with "it was dreadful! what are you doing here?!?!"

xpost, haha, no!

Cowell: "This is why we make the show to make barrowloads of money to give someone the chance to be a mid level pop star for six months unless by some total fluke we end up with another Leona/Alexandra"

This is, somewhat unsurprisingly, shitting all over Olly from a very great height.

yeah that was pretty good. Although I still can't imagine him as a pop star, really.

Yeah I don't think he's gonna be a pop star at all, album of show tunes plus mid-level West End career awaits basically.

Album of duets with Rhydian?
Anyway, poor lad looks like he's about to barf all over Dermot.

Aye, I'd go with that. Gareth Gates, basically, yeah?

xpost

Can Cheryl no' rein in the tears for five bloody seconds?

At least Kimberley has some better crowd control in South Shields this evening.

I keep making comparisons to David Sneddon but it's a slightly different thing, I think Sneddon went into songwriting? And Joe's got a bit more charisma than him but he still looks unbelievably awkward and stiff. I don't think 12 months in hiding getting reprogrammed is gonna work.

Yeah, Sneddon's a songwriter now. Joe's got a better voice than Leon Jackson, who was the last one of these folk to not be able to be reprogrammed into a star like what they've done with Alexandra, so there's something there for him, somewhere, surely.

Er, obviously he was the last one before Alexandra because he was, um, the winner before Alexandra. Ignore my pointless chronology, and basically, aye, Joe's a better Leon, but he's no Leona. Or something.

I don't know what that George Michael song was about, but at one point it sounded like he was implying that Jesus was his dealer.

Ten years of bong hits will do that to a man.

Ha, I couldn't even listen to it. It must be disheartening to be introduced as one of the biggest stars this country has ever produced, and get on to plug your new single which is going to be beaten to number one by the nothing little oik you've just sung a duet with.

Oh God, it's Paul McCartney.

"snow fell on my bed like sugar, put there by Jesus" or something.
Oh here's Paulie...

It would have been great if PM and his band had come on stage playing Beatles Rock Band.

NO OLLY NO NO NO NO JAMIE NO NO NO BAD POODLE DOG

"Drive My Car" fittingly turned out to be a car wreck.

God, I hate Paul McCartney so much.

I think I will just take this opportunity to laugh at Louis' tux with the leather lapels. And his bow tie.

He looks like the manager of a Harvester restaurant.

phew.

Oh what a surprise. Thanks for the really really REALLY long pause though, eh?

I wonder if he'll spoil it now by shouting HA HA I'VE WON YOU FUCKERS!

I can't believe that.....Ryan Giggs won.

McCartney must have been rehearsing for all of ten seconds before Cowell made the "ok, quadruple the pyrotechnics" call.

My kids seemed somewhat excited that Joe won, despite them having barely watched an episode. I think it's because Ollie is "old".

really busy here, only tuned in for the result (during the really long pause!). the right man won.

album of show tunes plus mid-level West End career awaits

think that will suit him fine!

Not intended as a diss, just think it's the most likely career path.

what did rachel do? haven't been watching, people just tweeted about her doing a lil mama

i hate paul mccartney btw

joe has no personality, olly has a hateable personality, i really hope their careers take a nosedive into the shitter starting the week after the xmas no 1

oh and the whole mccartney-on-stage-with-jedward thing - FINALLY THE MAN HAS FOUND HIS APPROPRIATE LEVEL

what did rachel do?

Grabbed Joe's mic and shouted "JOE'S WON!"

Think Rachel just cut in during Joe's end of show reprise and told him he was great or sump'n. I thought it was a bit ego-y but Mrs V says they're mates?

http://www.facebook.com/home.php?ref=logo#/group.php?gid=214261723536&ref=nf

Stacey Solomon Should Be The Voice On Sat Nav

Category:
Just for Fun - Totally Random
Description:
This group is for everyone who would buy a sat nav if you could have stacey solomon's voice on it.

16,732 members

Voting percentages

http://xfactor.itv.com/_uploads/documents/091213_votestats.pdf

Had to look it up to make sure, but that week Danyl got 36% really was the week he did the Aerosmith one

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XWq1NW27n7E

so bizarre that rachel came in the bottom two every time except the week she came...top

looking back on those though - wow, this really was a poor final 12, wasn't it :/

Also bizarre: The only week that the lowest polling act did not get eliminated was when Olly got less than JEdward!

that is o_O

why can't other shows publish these numbers? I would kill for Idol to do this.

danyl's %s fluctuate pretty wildly!

also rachel gets the highest % vote the week before she gets the boot.

(xxpost) all you need is a series of phone in votes scandals (not X Factor, but several other shows), a public outcry, and it's yours.

Not true, they never tell you what the voting patterns were in Strictly.

i really like this jls/alexandra performance!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NdgXMfLobJA&feature=player_embedded

It was rather exciting, especially because I feared that it might be mediocre. Better than Leona standing still (again) on a (Pete Townshend voice) bleeding box.

Jedward's "Under Pressure" single is a new entry at #2 in the UK chart.

What is WRONG with people? This is the one with Vanilla Ice, yes? I saw them blathering incomprehensibly about it, and some other stuff, on Jonathan Ross the other week, and they are quite possibly the strangest people ever to walk the earth.

Yeah it's the one with Vanilla Ice on it. J&E were just interviewed on Radio 1 by Reggie Yates and the poor guy couldn't get a word in edgeways.

oh, Britainpaws.

hasn't Vanilla Ice long claimed that 'Ice Ice Baby' doesn't sample 'Under Pressure'?

Yeah, he said something like "UP goes dun dun dun dun dun dun while IIB goes dun dun dun dundun dun dun". Which shows a distressing lack of awareness about how sampling actually works for someone, you know, who's oeuvre relies pretty heavily on sampling.

What is WRONG with people?

The fact that "fireflies" record still sold more that Jedward suggests that there's a lot more wrong with the world that a couple of Irish twins who can't really sing or dance at all.

But point taken, charts are eff-ed up at the moment. Take two versions of "Don't Stop Believing" into the shower? A song where the chorus goes "sha-na-na-na everyday"?

poor reggie yates ;_;

how did it come about that don't stop believin' become some kind of cultural touchpoint? did the revival start with the sopranos finale?

Can't decide which grin is cheesiest

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v165/noodle_vague/DSCF8156.jpg

I'm sure that Olly's facial expression has been stuck like that since the X Factor 2009 final.

"No, really, I'm perfectly alright with coming second to Joe, that winsomely grinning little troll."