Friday the 13th: Jason Goes to POLL

I have love for Jason X & even for Parts V and VII but 2 is the most evil looking Jason there is & is the clear class of the field

voted for the only one I can even remotely stand, the original. which is essentially like beating a bunch of one-legged people in a sack race

Final Chapter, easy

agree that these are all bad to varying degrees, but IV has a) Crispin Glover dancing and b) the super-freaky Corey Feldman stuff. I don't think the series ever got more genuinely creepy than the confrontation between Jason and Corey-as-Jason

the problem was I rented 2-4 one weekend at the suggestion of a fellow horror fan who assured me they were all fun, and after 2 and 3, I got so bored that midway through 4, I just couldn't sit through anymore. so I barely got to see the Feldman scenes. maybe one day I'll go back but every time I think about it I find a much more worthy movie to watch!

is Jason X the one in space?

yes. truly terrible but Cronenberg makes up for that a little bit.

Also, this looks a lot better than what we got with Part VIII:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OW590cfTK0A

the main reason I hate these movies is that they're completely useless when someone isn't getting killed. at least most other slashers I liked had a way of building tension even during quieter moments.

I sorta wish these movies were all 25 minutes long with Yakety Sax playing and Jason chasing the campers all over the place

also, is IV or V the one where Jason kills someone by crushing their head with a car door? because I pick that one

i still love how there was a score of people who cared so much about who was behind the mask that there were cries of "BRING BACK KANE HODDER" when like Freddy Vs Jason was coming out.

the one with the perfect face imprint? I think that was VI. xpost

yeah, looking on Wikipedia I guess it was VI

1-9 are on AMC this week btw. So you can make a more informed decision on the weekend.

ha like I'm going to sit down and watch these

2: Best overall, tightest focus on the idea that Jason is killing horny teenagers because he Cannot Love

3: best individual scene, when the star from Juwanna Mann harmonizes "ooh baby" with his girlfriend while shitting in a shack, Jason was totally justified in skewering them

4: Best stars! Corey Feldman and Crispin Glover

5: Most nudity

1 sucks so bad, what I've seen of the later ones (and the remake) are mostly zzz

3 also has weird stoner jokes and gouged eyes flying at the screen in what was clearly some awesome CD

3D i mean

sigh ok apparently the guy named Demon shitting in a shack while singing scene is in V, which with all the nudity makes it probably my second fave behind 2

V also has a girl stabbed while nonchalantly poplocking alone in her bedroom

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g74X9EtVO9A

I love horror but have never seen a single Jason film because the premises seem so boring and uncreative, especially when we have things like Freddy ripping out soneone's veins and manipulating them like a puppet, or turning in to a snake and fucking eating people.

I hate horror movies and have somehow managed to see two of these

1-9 are on AMC this week btw. So you can make a more informed decision on the weekend.

caught a bit of 1 last night and it was horribly edited - like, all the kill shots were cut out! so stupid

i think 4 is the best, followed probably by 2.

Freddy vs. Jason

[Vote]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Meut1UpZzaA

I like 1, 2 and 4 (never seen any of the others), but man, the absolute flying leaps it takes even to get from 1 -- in which Mrs. Voorhees is the killer and Jason, if he exists anywhere outside Adrienne King's head, is a scrawny, melonheaded freak at the bottom of a lake -- to 2, in which the killer is a fully-grown roid-freak Jason, is staggering. It makes no narrative sense whatsoever, even within the loose constraints of the genre.

Also, if these movies are all considered to take place in the same continuity, they make even LESS sense. Assuming the first one takes place the year it was released, in 1980:

-- Part 2 takes place, according to the movie itself, "five years later," in 1985 (but was released in 1981)
-- Part 3-D takes place the day after Part 2, so also in 1985 (released 1982)
-- Part 4 takes place the day after Part 3, so also in 1985 (released in 1984)
-- Part 5, released in 1985, takes place 5 years after Part 4, so in movie time, they're up to 1990, five years ahead of "real time"

. . . it's like, by the time you get to "Jason Takes Manhattan" these damned things should be taking place on a fucking moon colony.

To futz it up even more, "Jason X" was released in 2002, begins narratively in 2008 -- 28 years after the first one took place!! -- jumps forward to 2010, then the bulk of it takes place in 2455.

This series of reviews on the films discusses the timeline at the end of each entry. (links to all of them at the bottom)

http://mynewplaidpants.blogspot.com/2009/02/all-friday-fellas.html

Part 2 probably had the hottest guys, overall.

great link gukbe - many lolz

LOL#1
http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_Ne5Lb2SiFHg/SZWJtb25cmI/AAAAAAAAbwk/u4OtbF6XiN4/s1600-h/friday1+bill6.jpg

The notion that any one of the sequels is even close to as good as the original is just completely laughable.

whut

all u need to know about VIII JTM is that Jason decapitates a dude simply by punching him really hard in the face!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mj07Flf1iX0

Part 3 is on right now. The awkward 3-D bits are pretty lol.

The F13 series actually manages to be worse than the post-Halloween II Halloween movies, which is no slouch in the suck department

i kind of love manhattan

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_r556L3Codc

voted V. III & VII have a place in my heart as well.

II is probably the best one, but V takes it; not only does it have the most nudity, it also has the highest body count, a seriously disturbed, borderline-psychotic good guy, and a trick ending (hint: Jason Voorhies is not the killer...which perhaps should disqualify it in the eyes of most)

VII has a telekinetic girl, so that's pretty cool...

III has 3d kitsch factor, and the prototypical ilxor, Shelley.

Siskel and Ebert so obnoxiously self-righteous about their "dead teenager movies". kids have been going to the movies to see shitty monster films forever dudes.

The Portable Friday the 13th

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ww59WG8PqJ4

This is only a problem if you live to challop.

Part I has the best photography, and one great gore effect (the axe in the head), but that's about all I can say for it. The "twist" is lame and unearned, and ultimately it's just not scary. The general amateurishness of it is really pretty annoying; at least most horror franchises start out with a much better movie (Halloween, Hellraiser, NOES etc.)

But really, none of these movies are scary. There's really only one great moviemaking moment in the whole series: the shot in part 2 when the Final Girl is hiding in the shed and we see baghead Jason through the window, charging full bore at the shed.

I would vote for part VII if they had left all those crazy gore effects in, but since they didn't I'll vote for 2.

The notion that any one of the sequels is even close to as good as the original is just completely laughable.

― Hatch, Wednesday, October 20, 2010 12:14 AM (2 hours ago) Bookmark

They're all just different kinds of horrible.

Siskel and Ebert so obnoxiously self-righteous about their "dead teenager movies". kids have been going to the movies to see shitty monster films forever dudes.

― circa1916, Wednesday, October 20, 2010 1:31 AM (1 hour ago) Bookmark

otfm

still these movies are all pretty terrible

but kinda simultaneously awesome

http://www.fridaythe13thfilms.com/saga/bodycount.html

minute by minute for each film

Jason Voorhees
1 (23) : Axel - surgical hacksaw to the throat, neck broken
2 (24) : Nurse Morgan - gutted with a scalpel
3 (25) : Hitchhiker - knife through the neck
4 (26) : Samantha - knife through the torso
5 (27) : Paul - spear to the groin
6 (28) : Terri - spear in the back
7 (29) : Mrs. Jarvis - killed offscreen
8 (30) : Jimmy - corkscrew through hand, cleaver to the face
9 (31) : Tina - thrown through a window, lands on a parked car
10 (32) : Ted - knife to the head through movie screen
11 (33) : Doug - head crushed in Jason's bare hands
12 (34) : Sara - axe to the chest
13 (35) : Rob - garden harrow to the throat

Tommy Jarvis
14 (1) : Jason Voorhees - machete to the head

The F13 series actually manages to be worse than the post-Halloween II Halloween movies

I believe you meant post-Halloween III movies.

but kinda simultaneously awesome

"dying teenager" movies really lack the eccentricity of these films. So bland and wacky poplocker-free...

"dying teenager" movies today, I mean

one negative side of Scream-into-Scary-Movie is that the wackiness and the horror are now kept pretty separate in mainstream stuff. Back in the day actual Jason would have punched the head off a guy who was Soulja-Boy-esque. Now Jason kills Ambercrombie models while a guy actually playing Soulja Boy gets his head punched off in JASON'S STUPID.

1
rest are filth

this thread inspired me to watch the F13th re-boot. had to turn it off about 2/3 way through. honestly probably the worst of the bunch. besides being exceptionally bland and populated by beautiful young men and women who look almost identical, you've got a thinking Jason who sets clever little traps and has a secret underground lair. i expect these movies to be bad, but fuck, at least make Jason the Big Dumb Jason that we grew up with.

1 and 4 had the Savina treatment. I think 4 is the canonical choice amongst the nerds. Will not disagree.

Savini*

Part 3 was on TV last night - lolled at victim reading Fangoria, specifically an article about TOM Savini

Watched the original again the other night just for grins. I had forgotten that they actually killed a real snake on screen. Assholes.

Tie between 4 and "goes to hell."

they stand so much higher than the rest

The TV edit of the girl in the tent being cut in half from Goes to Hell was a real treat. Making out a bit then blood on the dude's face and that was it.

IV is the best, and features the most sympathetic characters, too. Lots of innocent folks on the periphery just trying to get by. VI is the funniest (on purpose). Which is the one with the not terribly graphic but pretty horrible sleeping bag death? VII? Yep, VII:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GRJWz8QO8ag

Dunno what it says that one of the less graphic kills was one of the most infamously censored scenes.

Uncut VII scenes (with commentary) here:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rZMWBszkx68&feature=related

Sleeping bag kill the best ever, any slasher.

Part VI by far! Why hasn't anybody given that one any love? CJ Graham wasn't as good as Jason as Kane Hodder, but it's the one where they figured out that the series was funny, not scary, and proceeded accordingly. Some of the best kills, an awesome Alice Cooper song, and one of the most spectacularly idiotic character resurrections in movie history -- it's a winner.

The rest kind of suck, although the first and seventh have their moments. Part IV is boring, the guy who played Jason sucked, and the kills weren't very clever. The primary reason it's notable is because of Corey Feldman and Crispin Glover, but that's really it.

this series is way more dependable than Nightmare, btw

That's just empirically false. Nightmare has three great films in the series (the first, third, and New Nightmare), part 4 is somewhat entertaining (and directed by Renny Harlin and written by Academy award winner Brian Helgeland), and part 2 is brilliantly campy. Parts five and six are the only out and out stinkers.

part 4 is somewhat entertaining

This is underselling it by several miles. If nothing else, it has Heather Langenkamp's "Just The Ten Of Us" co-star Brooke Thiess being turned into a cockroach. It also has a very cool "time loop" scene.

it doesn't really hang together as a film, but it does have some of the most creative dream sequences. The showdown with Friday at the end is pretty great.

Back in the day actual Jason would have punched the head off a guy who was Soulja-Boy-esque. Now Jason kills Ambercrombie models while a guy actually playing Soulja Boy gets his head punched off in JASON'S STUPID.

Still trying to parse this.

voted Jason X, only because an acquaintance of mine is in it and has the first death (and the scene with Cronenberg).

Back in the day actual Jason would have punched the head off a guy who was Soulja-Boy-esque. Now Jason kills Ambercrombie models while a guy actually playing Soulja Boy gets his head punched off in JASON'S STUPID.

Still trying to parse this.

Sorry, basically I'm just saying that instead of gross dead teenager movies with a wacky side, you have humorless gross dead teenager movies and wacky parodies of gross dead teenager movies.

Okay, I thought that was what you were getting at and I totally agree, I just got lost somewhere in that second sentence. Might just be my lack of sleep this weekend tho.

it did just hit me that to mourn this evolution you have to wistfully recall movies like The Dream Warriors.

The fourth Nightmare is pretty great overall.

Automatic thread bump. This poll is closing tomorrow.

Uh which one is the one with Jason in space killing all this space people on a spacestation and if thats not an option I can choose, why not?

Jason X

Automatic thread bump. This poll's results are now in.

gotta say I love that pop locking youtube
if I ever write a horror movie I think there will have to be a madatory pop locking scene

wow so Part 2 is *good* then?

I think the end of #1 would have been cooler if he jumped all the way out of the lake like a dolphin
but I guess I still like the ending

the longevity/persistence of this franchise is really some kind of small miracle given how uniformly stupid and poorly made these movies are

Wtf 2 sucks animal

it's funny though, nothing about the original F13 suggests "major movie franchise to come". Obviously they wanted it to catch fire given the ending, but the entire film screams "off-brand slasher flick", right down to the non-descript, hokey looking "Friday the 13th" font on the title screen.

it's not a great film by any means, but it's the kind of scuzzy slasher film I have grown to like. it doesn't have the inventive world-building or mythos of Elm Street, it's poorly paced at times, but it's pretty well-shot and has some great visuals and I still enjoy it.

saw it last night in an old-fashioned theatre and at least 10 people shrieked when Jason's corpse jumps out of the water. that kind of made my night. manipulative jump scare, sure, but one of my fav usages of it.

the longevity/persistence of this franchise is really some kind of small miracle given how uniformly stupid and poorly made these movies are

― stop swearing and start windmilling (Shakey Mo Collier), Wednesday, October 17, 2012 4:15 PM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

particularly since it took them a sequel to even introduce the version of the franchise character that everybody knows today, and the three films to give him his hockey mask. it's as if NOES began with Peggy Krueger killing people in dreams, and Freddy shows up in NOES2 wearing a beanie and a "where's the beef" t-shirt.

*watches IV again cos he's bored*

20-something male: Naw, I can't come in.
12 year old Cory Feldman: Aw, you gotta come in. I've got something really neat to show you in my room (*grab's stranger's hand, runs upstairs with him in front of horrified looking mother*)

https://m.popkey.co/e528fb/l4bN_f-maxage-0_s-200x150.gif

lol at Crispin Glover putting on "Love is a Lie" by Lion as makeout music

dear lord for a 90 minute movie that felt like Gunga Din. ooooh Jason has met his match, a young kid into horror and masks, defeated by....him shaving his head to remind him of himself and hitting him hard with a machete? ooook.

I'm gonna watch VI just for shits and giggles, skipping V.

(Gunga Din in length, that is)

when i went through these a few years ago i came away thinking 1 and 4 are the best. 1 has this really specific atmosphere to it that they basically never try for again. a lot of it's the rain

i legit love 4 bc idk cory feldman's narrative in that movie is for some reason super compelling to me and also there's batshit crispin glover

3!

Cheesy 80s 3D shots.

Cheesy 80s bikers.

Mask appears.

The goofy self-aware stuff hadn't creeped in yet. It still feels like a lean, mean-spirited exploitation film.

just watched VI. it was fun.

"what WERE you gonna be when you grew up?"

Yeah, one of my all-time favorite lines!

1=low-budget boilerplate
2=boring, half-flashback
3=inept mess. Lots of action in a tool-filled barn?
4=my fave, good Savini FX, sort of scary-ish (for the series) at times?
5=pointless, no Jason, sort of the Psycho II of the series.
6=funny, self-aware. I read the novelization (!) when I was little. Chops off the heads of three paintballers at once?
7=can't remember. Telekinetic girl? Does this one have the sleeping bag kill?
8=NYC? A complete POS. Shot in Vancouver?
9=Goes to hell? Only one I saw in theaters. Some dude eats a heart and turns into Jason? It does have a clever opening scene.
10=space. Never saw it.
11=vs. Freddy? Is this the one directed by a Hong Kong guy? Want to say I saw it but barely remember it. Battle in a corn field?
Reboot: really cool opening conceit, don't remember the rest. (Want to say My Bloody Valentine reboot had a similar opening conceit?)

how bad do these parents gotta hate their kids to keep sending them to this damn camp

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fvVNfQDXnPo

I was half watching these things last week with the sibs while drinking beer and after spending the day at Disney World. Pretty much the optimal way to see them, imo. The depictions of city life in Manhattan are spectacularly hilarious (the heroine is kidnapped and shot up with heroin within minutes of the protagonists making landfall).

i just watched them all except for freddy v jason and imo:

6
4
1
2
goes to hell (i can't believe this movie exists)
x
manhattan
7
reboot
5
3

this series is way more dependable than Nightmare, btw

― Whiney G. Weingarten, Sunday, October 24, 2010 3:53 PM (six years ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

That's just empirically false. Nightmare has three great films in the series (the first, third, and New Nightmare), part 4 is somewhat entertaining (and directed by Renny Harlin and written by Academy award winner Brian Helgeland), and part 2 is brilliantly campy. Parts five and six are the only out and out stinkers.

― sounds like Dream Theater (J3ff T.), Sunday, October 24, 2010 4:06 PM (six years ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

whiney from 6 years ago is right, there's an evenness to this series that nightmare does not manage, and characterizing nightmare 2 as "brilliantly campy" is giving a shitty movie with some gay parts wayyy too much credit

I agree Friday 6 is best, 4 second best, rest are degrees of shit, save the like three fake out meta intros of the reboot. Which then turns to shit.

basically for me it's

Friday 1 - fun if not generic, off-brand feeling (the ending is hilarious)
Friday 2 - never has watching kids get hacked up been so fuckin boring
Friday 3 - zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
Friday 4 - zzzzzzzzzz O FUCK FELDMAN IS CRAZY AT THE END also lol Crispin Glover
Friday 6 - fun and enjoyable, w/ funays, but not amazing or anything
Jason goes to hell - everybody who made this should be killed

all others - haven't and won't see em

These movies are pretty much garbage, but they had consistently good man-candy.

even NOES 3 is better than the best Friday (tho NOES 3 is actually p good, especially the scene w/ Freddie's nun mama)

tho "the bastard child of a thousand maniacs" annoyed me, like that's not how biology works, all their sperm didn't congeal into a crowdsourced baby

well unless he was a chimera i guess

noes 3 is better than any friday and is one of the best movies ever, yes

NOES is the better series, it's true, but I had a wicked good time watching a marathon of that Friday trash with my sibs last Halloween. It's working its charms on me.

And NOES 4 is better than NOES 3. I wish the world would just wise up and get behind me on that one already.

I wish the world would just wise up and get behind me

o i bet u would

i turned off NOES 4 after chica's boyfriend died in the accident.

Freddy's Dead: The Final NIghtmare, I made it to the Arnolds' cameo

Boyfriend dies in 5, which is not good.

derp - i guess I don't remember which one IV is then other than I know i didn't finish it either.

N1 is properly original and scary.
N2 is batshit and kind of grim (maybe the equivalent of Friday V?)
N3 and N4 are Hollywood slick and entertaining and actually exhibit some continuity in terms of character/story (iirc). Plus ... Dokken song?
Don't remember much about the rest, really.

Like F4, it's a peak of competency, with excellent Savini FX, and quirky actors/scenes. Same for F6, plus humor (tho minus Savini FX) and a solid attempt at closure. Plus ... Alice Cooper song? The worst Friday movies, basically the rest, are borderline inept, but particularly 3(D), Goes to Hell and NYC. Goes to Hell has a sort of funny meta-intro too, iirc, though not as ambitious as the reboot.

NSFW
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0CmPPt6xk_I

don't particularly understand the ambitious qualities of the reboot's intro. they just dispatch an entire group of teens in the first 20 minutes

jason getting blown up in goes to hell is awesome and hilarious

I only saw the reboot once, whenever it was, but iirc it starts out with a pretty standard campfire scene, followed by a Jason massacre. Then it turns out *that* is a campfire story being told by a contemporary batch of counselors ... who are then slaughtered themselves. Then it turns out *that* is something of a flashback, and it jumps to the current story, at which point we get opening credits, like, 15 minutes into the movie. They do something similarly clever with the "My Bloody Valentine" reboot, iirc.

Then it turns out *that* is a campfire story being told by a contemporary batch of counselors

that is NOT what happens

it starts off in black and white telling the abbreviated story of part one, then shifts to the teens who are looking for giant weed plants in crystal lake, who get slaughtered, then it shifts to jared padalecki and the other group of teens

Sure set *me* straight! Which is the one where that person is stabbed with that thing?

The Care Bears Movie 2

That's the one that starts with the flashback, right? That's the one where we find out how the Care Bears became the Care Bears?

No, that's the third one. The second one is where the Care Bears blow up the Death Star.

Spoilers, dude, I only saw the first one.

If Parts 2, 3 and 4 are supposed to take place on subsequent days, then which of those were on Friday The 13th?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3_f0ELRcgCo

only 2 iirc

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tbzF3NN_7aA

I guess I didn't vote in this because I would've voted for Goes to Hell.

glad to know someone else on earth who likes goes to hell

that movie is a diseased dick tbf

no accounting for taste

lol soz but as soon as the medic took a big ole bite out of Jason's heart I knew it was gonna be a long 90 minutes

binge watching these now, up to VI Jason Lives.

So far I'd say 4 was the best due to more interesting characters.

V is an utter joke.

I am liking this new and improved super Jase in VI so far.

totally confused as to how Jason got to NYC though.

there's a boat

yeah, I wasn't sure how the small boat got from the lake to big boat. Guess there's some kind of river.

jason isn't generally constrained by the laws of physics by that point in the series

Doubt it will stay up long, but some psycho edited all of the movies together into one sort of coherent 85 minute movie that has every victim/camper converge on Camp Crystal Lake at once to be picked off at a crazy clip:

https://vimeo.com/289599739?cjevent=0f5e55b1ca8711e8837d01b30a240614

ok so 3-8 are all on prime and what do i have better to do with my life than rewatch the friday the 13th movies for the 2918290049th time?

but this time i came away really loving vii: the new blood. it's deeply flawed and was sliced and diced in order to get an r rating... yet it rocks??? probably the only movie in the series where there's a stronger antagonist than jason in the mix (dr. crews, the worst gaslighting piece of shit man in the world!!!!) which makes the dynamic sooo interesting; jason kinda becomes this subconscious response to one's life and pain being exploited constantly by abusive men. practically a horror essay in and of itself!

sleeping bag death forever

i also like part v now! it's so sleazy and mean and yet... the free range halfway house for teens with mental illness is a v weird place for jason to murder a bunch of people, it kind of reminds me of dream warriors for some reason? i normally don't spend a lot of time identifying with the people jason murders but in v i basically feel them all (except for the hillbillies) (god what a fucking weird movie)

lot of objectively lame things about the movie like the twist and ending with tommy jarvis' second heel turn in two movies, but i loooove the character of traumatized tommy jarvis regardless, if anything the worst tommy is part vi's horn dog dumbass who accidentally resurrects jason by impaling his dead body with a large metal pole, we all saw that one coming tommy (i love him too don't worry)

i just watched them all except for freddy v jason and imo:

6
4
1
2
goes to hell (i can't believe this movie exists)
x
manhattan
7
reboot
5
3

― who is extremely unqualified to review this pop album (BradNelson), Tuesday, January 17, 2017 6:04 PM (two years ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

jason goes to hell pales in memory, i need to rewatch it but now that i have more affection for the core 8, i can no longer completely fuck with it. my current ranking:

vi: jason lives
vii: the new blood
ii
tie: jason takes manhattan / jason x (basically the same movie, boat vs. space)
iv: the final chapter
v: a new beginning
i
iii
jason goes to hell
reboot

weird that they all changed lol

oh i've seen freddy vs jason now, it's somewhere in the bottom of that ranking. i think it's fun but it's tarnished for me bc freddy makes a racist joke at kelly rowland

...and then she calls him a faggot

oh yeah! i for some reason erased *that* part from my memory. fuck freddy vs. jason (which is so so fun outside of that scene, whyyyy)

It’s jarring as hell

What I mostly remember about that film is how explicitly it emphasises (to the point of exaggeration) the sexual undertones of both franchises - Freddie’s child molestation and the virginity of the lead character - in a way that feels properly sleazy and nasty. Obv that kind of making the subtext text was what passed for clever in the 90s slashers, but it really gave that film an edge (and yeah, it is generally fun)

I do not love this franchise but I enjoyed goes to hell a lot, also whichever one has the kids in

VI, which is the best. I actually read the novelization of that one!

Hell was the only one I saw in the theaters. I did not pick a winner, but it definitely has perhaps the best cold open.

vi does a pretty great tightrope walk imo, extremely goofy and fun and meta but also straight up chilling at points, cf. the one cabin with blood spattered EVERYWHERE, anytime jason's figure looms over the kids and you wonder "is... is he going to murder children??!?!?!"

The cutaway to a kid reading no exit before bed was a good cheap lol I was not expecting, also “what were you gonna be when you grew up?”

Terry Kiser was Dr Crews in #7. A real "That Guy" actor. He was good as a corpse in the two Weekend at Bernie's films but i think i first saw him as a comedian named "Vic Hitler" iirc on WKRP.

The cutaway to a kid reading no exit before bed was a good cheap lol I was not expecting, also “what were you gonna be when you grew up?”

― mumsnet blvd (wins), Tuesday, April 23, 2019 2:03 PM (eight minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

two of my favorite moments in the whole series

vi is just an embarrassment of awesome scenes. hard rock summer in the usa

The humour in these films is usually excruciating to me so I maybe overrate it when it lands

also something i noticed recently: the only friday movies with zero nudity are i and vi

Interesting! That's like learning that "The Godfather" supposedly has no profanity (I haven't seen it for a while).

Terry Kiser was Dr Crews in #7. A real "That Guy" actor. He was good as a corpse in the two Weekend at Bernie's films but i think i first saw him as a comedian named "Vic Hitler" iirc on WKRP.

― omar little, Tuesday, April 23, 2019 2:07 PM (two hours ago) Bookmark

vic hitler is from hill street blues

yeah that's right, he was someone else on WKRP. Also had a recurring role early during Night Court's run.

Interesting! That's like learning that "The Godfather" supposedly has no profanity (I haven't seen it for a while).

― Josh in Chicago, Tuesday, April 23, 2019 7:13 PM bookmarkflaglink

Woltz says "son of a bitch"

I've seen these shitty movies so many times over the years, in various forms and formats, and only noticed something nuts: Jason's mom goes crazy because he died unsupervised at the camp as a kid in the late '50s. So how did Jason become a full grown adult by the second movie?

no one knows

well, also, he's a full grown adult because these movies take place in the '80s. my theory is that he didn't die and lived in the woods for 20 years, either unbeknownst to his mom or beknownst to his mom but she was still driven by the delusion that he died. this idea is sorta ventured in friday part 2

Isn’t it suggested he didn’t drown and survived as a feral youth in the woods or something?

Xp yeah that I think

I think he's actually just a very large child.

So really ... his mom was the negligent one.

xpost Like Blaster in Thunderdome?

So the deformed Jason pulling her under is assumed to be a hallucination?

Granted that makes sense because Jason or the Voorhies were never meant to be explored again in the series, originally

https://horrorenthusiast.com/index.php/bloody-tabloid/friday-the-13th-franchise/61-is-jason-voorhees-immortal-friday-the-13th-facts

It may seem odd on the face of it to suggest that he's a child, but it actually explains a lot of otherwise inexplicable aspects of the character of Jason Vorhees, like why he's always skipping and asking passersby for a lolly.

Jason vs Thunderdome was clearly the best of these

He's also like Evil Sloth, maybe.

So the deformed Jason pulling her under is assumed to be a hallucination?

yes but this also makes no sense. my theory is that, despite the existence of a corporeal adult jason, the ghost of young jason haunts the lake

but these movies also don't care if they make any sense

I like the maybe-fakeout maybe-nightmare who cares ending of 2. “Where’s Paul?”

I might watch the really terrible ones tonight

Going too deep into the postgame worldbuilding wrt these characters whose initial conception basically began and ended with 'dude in weird mask kills folks for...reasons?' is how we get Michael Myers the druidic golem (or whatever the hell that nonsense was).

Oh god, the Cult of Thorn

My current personal hot take on the franchise is that the TV series trumps the movie series. It is such wonderfully cheesy goodness.

The episode with the evil compact that made people obsessively fall in love with the wielder, who then felt compelled to kill them, was great

Oh god, the Cult of Thorn

― When I am afraid, I put my toast in you (Neanderthal), Monday, October 28, 2019 8:39 AM (five minutes ago) bookmarkflaglink

i put myself through the nightmare on elm street sequels this year and it's official: halloween is still the worst horror franchise i've ever seen (still love almost every movie in it though)

Mind, the whys and hows of these movies' mythologies are of course pretty meaningless; Carpenter got it right the first time when he simply hand-waved Michael away as "pure evil" or whatever. But even so, in the case of Jason specifically, his death due to counselor negligence is the entire impetus for the first film, so to have him alive after all implies he was not only living alone in the woods for 25 years or so, but that his mother was totally unaware he was still alive. (Was there any throwaway line in the first one like "they never found his body"?) Credit Part VI and beyond with this, at least they make him a full-on worm-food zombie, which explains his take a licking, keep on ticking invincibility.

shout factory blu box looks siiiiick

https://www.shoutfactory.com/product/friday-the-13th-collection-deluxe-edition

if you watch Friday the 13th backwards, a hockey goalie heals murder victims by walking away from them

— kim. (@KimmyMonte) August 30, 2020

I watched the first 4 of these last October, they are all terrible but so far my ranking is:

4
2
1
3

last night I picked this back up with 5/A New Beginning, it's wild!! so sleazy but also like almost entirely gore-free??? and full of sloppy continuity errors and exceptionally bad acting (I can't tell if the acting is even worse than the other 4 films or it's just as bad and I've just forgotten). The weird goth/new-wave girl might be my favorite F13 character of the series so far.

I was binging F13 last year and made it up to Part VII before I had to stop. I really should try to finish up the series at some point, but I'm in the middle of going through Halloween at the moment. Part 5 definitely has the worst acting. My favorite bit is the douchey greaser dude singing "rat-a-tat-a-tat-a-tat-a-tooie! rat-a-tat-a-tat-a-tat-a-tooie!"

The new wave girl is awesome for poppin' and lockin' in front of her Alan Parsons Project poster.

bingeing

I put off watching F13 for so long because the premise seemed so boring, and last year I decided I owed it to myself to watch them, and everything I assumed about them ws 100% correct.

The new wave girl is awesome for poppin' and lockin' in front of her Alan Parsons Project poster.

― peace, man, Wednesday, October 6, 2021 11:47 AM (seventeen minutes ago) bookmarkflaglink

otm

i love part v, it's so gross

I feel like I've posted this on ilx before, but here is a decent song/video about Part V, A New Beginning by Wolfie's Just Fine.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qG8iAtpavK4

Genuinely enjoy Part VI, which is a surprisingly smart and funny installment, and not even just relative to most of the movies, which are generally unreasonably stupid. Part IV will always be my fave, as far as the more traditional Friday the 13th movies go. I do love the meta opening of the remake, though, which they successfully pulled off a second time with the remake of My Bloody Valentine (which remains my favorite of these standard-issue slashers).

really excited for steve to get to part vi, i really love pre-scream self-aware slashers and that's one of the very best

The only movie critic I trust, Vern, is reviewing all the movies, one a day.

Part I

Part II

Part III

"the first movie is actually good for what it is" is something i fundamentally agree with so he's off to a good start

they're all good though. except for jason goes to hell, which is bad but fascinating. and the remake, which has a few good ideas but is dull and unmemorable outside of them

Omg his reviews are brilliant

A little later we see a different rabbit dead on the road. Maybe it’s just for scenery, like the dead armadillo in THE TEXAS CHAIN SAW MASSACRE. But this guy is not roadkill. Doesn’t it seem like Jason is supposed to have killed him? What I am proposing is that rabbits can sense Jason, and Jason knows it. They’re like dogs to Terminators. If he doesn’t want people to see him coming, he has to kill all the rabbits in the area. And if so that means the best way to be safe from Jason is to carry a rabbit around in a cage, like Jean-Claude Van Damme in THE SHEPHERD: BORDER PATROL. Think about it.

Part 5 definitely has the worst acting. My favorite bit is the douchey greaser dude singing "rat-a-tat-a-tat-a-tat-a-tooie! rat-a-tat-a-tat-a-tat-a-tooie!"

ugh vii is the BEST goddamn you

it's def got the coziest-looking sweaters

Yes, the outhouse scene is definitely from the same movie.

VII isn't bad but all the gore got hacked out! I'm a big John Carl Buechler fan so I want to love it more than I do. I'll probably watch these all again next year and revise my opinions.

2, 4, and 6 are the ones for me. 4 being the uncontroversial favorite.

1 is good too, but y’know… I like Jason.

I’m thinking about marathoning Halloween this month, realized I’ve seen almost none of the sequels past 3.

honestly I got the first five years ago to binge watch and I got so bored I didn't even finish.

I like trashy slasher and I love voluminous franchises with needless sequels, but while I've seen all of these now (except Jason X, and Jason Takes Manhattan), it was purely due to academic interest.

that said, I like I and VI

VII isn't bad but all the gore got hacked out! I'm a big John Carl Buechler fan so I want to love it more than I do. I'll probably watch these all again next year and revise my opinions.

One and two have a nice grainy grime to them, though they're a bit boring and rote. By 3 I feel like they start to go too far in the other direction, overboard with the bright sitcom lighting and self-aware (in the worst sense) gimmicks (even more than the pokey 3D shit).

Goes to Hell is a piece of shit (though the only one I've seen in the theater!), but the intro scene is awesome.

One thing that really bothered me about 5 was that when the guy gets twisted to death against the tree, they keep cutting back and forth from the hands twisting the wooden rod to the guy's face, and all of a sudden the rod-twisting switches from counter-clockwise to clockwise and it was so apparent and I just had this moment of like "damn, they just stopped trying for this one", also Pam running away from fake-Jason at the end and falling and rolling around over and over and over was like extra EXTRA stupid, even by F13 helplessness standards

I’m thinking about marathoning Halloween this month, realized I’ve seen almost none of the sequels past 3.

my feelings on the sequels

Halloween 4 - mostly crap, cool ending
Halloween 5 - mostly crap, crap ending
Halloween 6 - whether you watch the original or director's cut, CRAAAAAAP
Halloween: H20 - weird flick, mostly cos Myers has to drive 2,000 miles to get to Laurie Strode. very dated because shitty Creed songs play during the movie. but pretty good!
Halloween: Resurrection - awful awful terrible shit this is like American Pie: Halloween featuring a very OTT Busta Rhymes, god I hated this era of horror

(not part of this series but)

Rob Zombie Halloween - lol fuck this movie
Rob Zombie Halloween 2 - didn't see, see prior comment

and then

Halloween (2018) - wow this actually is fun, stupid moments aside (like the Loomis-esque doctor who turns out to be an OTT weirdo)

my favorite thing about the first three Fridays is they can be summarized as such

Friday the 13th - no Jason, mommy is killer
Friday the 13th, Part 2 - Jason has paper bag over head
Friday the 13th, Part 3 - Jason now found a mask

the Jason in 3 is infuriatingly sedate, I remember telling Brad last year that his demeanor was basically like, bored dad ambling around the barbecue waiting for something to do, like he doesn't even want to be there

"his pulse never went above 85 bpm"

I used to love these dumb movies and seeing them in the theaters was part of the fun, but I got really turned off to seeing them in crowds when we went to see Freddy v Jason and the crowd went uncomfortably nuts, screaming in giddiness when Jason killed Kelly Rowland's character. It was gross and weird.

the only redeeming thing about 3 was this character's necklace, a miniature boot on a string?????

https://i.imgur.com/9dmipeO.jpg

I will also say that 5 movies in I continue to be surprised at how tame they are, like ALL of the gore has been cut out and somehow all of the footage was lost and we don't have restored directors cuts of like, any of these???? titties aside, every single one of these has felt like an edited-for-tv version

Halloween: H20 - weird flick, mostly cos Myers has to drive 2,000 miles to get to Laurie Strode.

there needs to be a film to document the Myers road trip IMO

As it turns out, there is a shadow transportation app out there that helps get slashers from point A to point B, called Slyce.

LOL

turns out Michael Myers does speak, just wait til you fuck up his omelette at Waffle House - you won't hear the end of it

I will also say that 5 movies in I continue to be surprised at how tame they are, like ALL of the gore has been cut out and somehow all of the footage was lost and we don't have restored directors cuts of like, any of these???? titties aside, every single one of these has felt like an edited-for-tv version

"Hey man, make sure you give me five stars, but watch those finger knives on the leather please."

my feelings on the sequels

Halloween 4 - mostly crap, cool ending
Halloween 5 - mostly crap, crap ending
Halloween 6 - whether you watch the original or director's cut, CRAAAAAAP
Halloween: H20 - weird flick, mostly cos Myers has to drive 2,000 miles to get to Laurie Strode. very dated because shitty Creed songs play during the movie. but pretty good!
Halloween: Resurrection - awful awful terrible shit this is like American Pie: Halloween featuring a very OTT Busta Rhymes, god I hated this era of horror

(not part of this series but)

Rob Zombie Halloween - lol fuck this movie
Rob Zombie Halloween 2 - didn't see, see prior comment

and then

Halloween (2018) - wow this actually is fun, stupid moments aside (like the Loomis-esque doctor who turns out to be an OTT weirdo)

Yeah, during my current rewatch, I got up through 4, then skipped to 2018. Might revisit some of the other entries later. I watched the first Zombie entry years ago and don't remember too much about it, but I heard that the second one is the better of his two.

i mean slasher movies from the 80s also just seem a bit tamer because they used to threaten X ratings for much more benign shit back then, so a lot of the more OTT stuff got shelved or 'edited' to cut away or were merely implied.

whereas nowadays you can show a brutal decapitation on a Marvel television show that is ultimately otherwise considered PG-13 ish (Daredevil) and nobody bats an eyelid.

Halloween 3 fucking rules though

8 more days to Halloween
halloween
halloween

omg neanderthal, watch jason x immediately

or don't and just put on Moonraker or Superman 3 or something instead

let's watch both *slams Budweiser down*

Jason X, Moonraker

i'm rewatching Halloween (2018), once I finish that, I will probably throw Jason X on. heard too much about it to put off any longer :)

halloween 4 is a good movie. halloween 5 is a cursed movie, much like friday part v. halloween 6 is like... a total misfire that is fun to watch but it also sort of sucks, much like jason goes to hell

halloween resurrection is fucking hilarious

like the moment where there's two Michael Myers walking around and for a moment you're like OMG, this is how he's immortal! he franchised serial killing, like Gallagher with his comedy show, he hires multiple Michael Myers to do the killing, omg this is brill

and then one of them pulls his mask off and he's Busta Rhymes trolling the people on his reality show.

weak.

Yes, I will get around to Jason X sometime this season.

Halloween takes are OTM. 3 is spectacular, 1 & 2 are fine, the rest of the OG sequels are zzzzzzzzzzzz. Most worthless of the Big Three slasher franchises, easily. Will also watch the 2018 sequel sometime soon, though.

resurrection is the hellraiser sequel of the halloween franchise, totally unrelated movie with michael myers grafted onto it

the dude at the end of Halloween 3 is kinda me at work every day

"STOP IT! STOP IT! STOOOOOOOOPPPP ITTTT"

(director's cut of the zombie halloween 2 is astonishing)

the problem I have with early-mid 2000s slasher films is that it reminds you how lame bro culture was back then.

fuckin half expected Michael Myers to sip on a Zima

Halloween III is definitely unique. I wouldn't necessarily say it rules though. I think a lot of people try to defend it because of the backlash. It's like Phantasm meets Howard the Duck meets IT (1990) and probably a few other things.

The poster is one of the best movie posters of all time though. The comic book series Stray Dogs just used the poster art as a variant cover for their tpb.

https://media.keycollectorcomics.com/media/b1629464859608s-l1600__3_.jpg

lol, I xposted right over Brad's Halloween opinions. I rewatched Halloween 4 a couple weeks back and I still don't think I've awoken from my coma. Sorry, Brad.

The Loomis turn in the remake is one of the all-time groaner contrivances.

listen, if you fall asleep to a movie, i consider that a good thing. the thing that rocks about halloween 4 is the autumnal vibe is the strongest in that one

the michael myers mask sucks ass but i like pretty much everything else about it

there are a few undercooked ideas in Halloween 3 that keep it from being perfect for me, but Kupfer's entire family being killed is an astonishing critique of unchecked capitalism and it rules

Fun fact: I have read the novelizations of both Friday the 13th part 6 and Halloween 4.

also I love that Helloween's first EP samples that annoying assed "8 more days to Halloween song" before the song kicks in

xpost

Jamie walked down the stairs, sobbing. She was wearing her uncle's mask, and holding a bloody knife.

Loomis did not even need a moment for the truth to sink in.

Jamie...

...was on drugs.

Immediately, he pulled out his pistol and shot Jamie dead.

Not in Reagan's America, you don't.

halloween 2 (rob zombie)
halloween
halloween 3: season of the witch
halloween h20
halloween 4: the revenge of michael myers
halloween 2
halloween (rob zombie)
halloween 5: the cookie woman
halloween: resurrection
halloween (2018) (sorry)

Trailer for the 3rd in the new Halloween trilogy will have a slowed down/creepy kids’ choir version of the “8 more days till Halloween” silver shamrock song y/n

the editing of halloween (2018) is very bad and i hate the conception of laurie's character and the humor seems flown in from another movie and punctures the mood

Huh guess I need to see the second Zombie one. I didn't hate his first one, but never heard much enthusiasm for the second.

I find him to be a frustrating director, I love about half of his stuff and hate the others. I haven't seen 3 From Hell, 31 or Halloween 2 though.

jon: seek out the director's cut of zombie's halloween 2, which is i think the default streaming version. it's a major exploration of laurie's ptsd

Will do! Was trying to decide what to watch this weekend.

it is filmed in 16mm and looks so gnarly and grim and the moonlight looks like its emanating from the cover of a black metal album

listen, if you fall asleep to a movie, i consider that a good thing. the thing that rocks about halloween 4 is the autumnal vibe is the strongest in that one

also if you like lords of salem, most likely you'll find a lot to like in halloween 2

huh I just saw Lords of Salem and did enjoy it.

the autumnal vibe

Like when Loomis is poking around that desert gas station in (checks notes) Illinois? I love the part where the babysitter is looking for the little girl in the darkened streets (caused by the power outage, which was an awesome kill).

the power outage is the other best part of that film

also if you like lords of salem, most likely you'll find a lot to like in halloween 2

Yes! Definitely a top tier Zombie film, I love it.

i only like that and Devil's Rejects

31 made me mad enough that I left 30 minutes in

and I was on a plane

i looove 31 but acknowledge that no one normal would ever think that

Jason Goes to Hell is hilarious for deciding to introduce new mystical mythology that will never again appear in any other Friday film - ooooh a mystical DAGGER, the heart is Jason, Jason is the heart!

some all-powerful heart couldn't help him SWIM BETTER, lil punk

Robert Campbell : I'm going to say a couple of words to you and I want you to say the first thing that comes into your mind.
Creighton Duke : Okay.
Robert Campbell : Jason Voorhees.
Creighton Duke : That makes me think of a little girl in a pink dress sticking a hot dog through a doughnut.

Halloween briefly went the mystical route as well. Druids, iirc.

I loved Lords of Salem and Devil's Rejects is probably the best whatever that is that it can be. But those Halloween movies were so unpleasant, imo. Well, I think the first one is the one I saw. Maybe? Anyway, there's only so much of Zombie's ugly hillbilly grunge I can take.

i like but don't love the first zombie halloween. i'm not married to the idea of michael as this unknowable embodiment of evil so i think glimpsing his actual home life as filtered through zombie's particular tobe hooper thing is really effective in setting the scene. the second half of the film is just halloween but less scary and gorier and i'm like... it's fine. ugh now i want to watch it again

the ending whips, though, that's for sure

I hated the Druidish Cult of Thorn shit, weakened Michael Myers as a character completely

it's extremely stupid, which is why i find it hilarious and fun

cf. the mystery man wandering through halloween 5, who they hadn't even invented the cult of thorn around yet because the producer just wanted a mystery man in the fucking movie, it's so awesome

my problem of the first half of the first Zombie Halloween is that I didn't buy that Michael's home life would have driven him to that, as depicted. yeah, it was dysfunctional ,but like, there has to be more - Ed Gein was unusually obsessed with his mother, she used to spank his penis, preached to her kids about evil from the Bible every day in histrionic fashion, had few friends because of his mother's domineering attitude. yeah Michael had an nasty, creepy father-in-law in this one, and his mother was a stripper, but she was a much more caring parent than most serial killers had. didn't help that the dialogue was soooooo bad in those scenes.

and yet those were the *best* scenes in the movie, once they got to the 'beginning' of the original Halloween, I aws already exhausted and they had to rush through the beats.

the other annoying part about Resurrection, OOOOOH wow we found all this evidence that the parents were barbarically abusing Michael and lol it's all faked by producer BUSTA RHYMES again.

all of the best ideas for the movie were LOL GOTCHA trolling

i mean slasher movies from the 80s also just seem a bit tamer because they used to threaten X ratings for much more benign shit back then, so a lot of the more OTT stuff got shelved or 'edited' to cut away or were merely implied.

this is true to an extent but I feel like I've seen other 80s slashers with a lot more gore, it almost feels punitive, like the mpaa went extra hard on F13 to make an example out of them or something

Besides Halloween III I've only seen the first Halloween once, and like 20+ years ago, and remember finding it boring. It's on my list to rewatch this month, and this thread makes me feel OK abt skipping the rest of the sequels

as far as franchises go I'm planning to finish out F13 6-8, then Child's Play/Chucky 2-5, then Phantasm 1-4. Are the Hellraiser sequels past 2 worth it?

3 isn't, and I stopped there.

I feel like I've seen other 80s slashers with a lot more gore, it almost feels punitive, like the mpaa went extra hard on F13 to make an example out of them or something

hellraiser 3 has the dj cenobyte with a cd bisecting his head, plus the absolutely inexplicable seedy metal club, plus the best character in the first three movies, terri. it's like, awful, but there's a lot to recommend about it

i saw bloodline and there's a good movie in there somewhere, but they didn't make it

i have not explored further bc even trash connoisseurs have described the later installments as worthless and miserable

one thing i greatly dislike about hellraiser 3 is that pinhead is explicitly rewritten as a villain, and the one of the things i liked most about the first two movies is that the cenobytes are just kinda unwitting servants of the ultra hardcore s&m club that is hell, and that there are living people who are much worse and more sadistic than them

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IGWz5psncCI

hellraiser 3 has the dj cenobyte with a cd bisecting his head

ok thats incredibly hilarious, never heard about that, might actually be on my watchlist now

like 15 years ago at a fest i remember seeing a short doc about the child actor who played jason in f13 part 1, all grown up somewhere in the midwest, fronting a klezmer band playing synagogues & bar mitzvahs by day, doing a jason-themed metal band by night, and trying to impress people in bars by asking them if they'd ever seen Friday the 13th. very funny in a post-American Movie way.

Oh there's also a Cenobite in III with a camera in his face. It's like Pinhead transformed the staff of an HH Gregg.

The other thing I'm trudging through right now is the documentary Crystal Lake Memories, which chronicles the making of the F13 movies in oral history format. I am at hour two and they are pretty much in the beginning of discussion for Part IV and there are FOUR HOURS LEFT.

It's got (for example) the child actor who played Jason in the first one and tons of other actors and production people. Corey Feldman shows up, but Kevin Bacon doesn't.

crystal lake memories and never sleep again are the best documentaries ever i find them so gripping lol

I am pretty certain I've seen all of Crystal Lake Memories yet I remember literally nothing about it.

xpost Yes, I could blow an entire day watching them back-to-back. If anything, they're TOO short!

And I love that Crystal Lake Memories was thoughtful enough to include my beloved Friday the 13th: The Series (which I just finally finished watching and am about to start all over again).

Oh, that's what's missing from the poll and what I would've voted for. Who cares if it has nothing to do with Jason. It has big-haired bad-acting '80s Canadian goddess ROBEY, for god's sake.

i tried Jason X and I just couldn't. something about horror films and bro comedies from the early 2000s has always rubbed me the wrong way, so once they all got on the spaceship and started fucking each other.

the kill where he froze the girl's face and smashed it was cool though!

*and started fucking each other I just got really annoyed, like I know that's the F13 formula but these were scientists in space acting really dumb and shirking their responsibilities for a little sexy time.

i feel you to a degree, but no movie has funnier dialogue than jason x, cf. "what's a bike?"

"hockey mask"?

"it was a sport before it was outlawed in 2024"

OH BOY NO MORE HOCKEY SOON

all this crazy shit happened and yet gender relations have not progressed at all since the late '90s, i love it

rewatched Part II. liked it better - it has long dull spots but they play with pacing better, and Jason actually being a child-like hillbilly wearing JC Penney's finest Paul Bunyan attire actually works pretty well.

guessing they thought it felt too much like Leatherface and then Incredible Hulk shows up in later films

beginning of 3 starts with news reporter talking about the most heinous crime in local history...you mean besides the other three incidents?

lol I love figuring out which scenes were obviously shot with 3-D in mind in the third one.

baseball bat... juggling... eye-popping out of a guy's skull

they never really did 3d better

I believe I've referred to it in the past as Handles!: The 3-D Experience.

Like there's a point in Muppetvison 3-D where Fozzie whacks a paddleball at the camera as a gag re: the super obvious 3-D tricks they intend to avoid. F13 III is that gag repeated for 90 minutes. Gloriously stupid.

The eyeball squeezed from the socket really is the high point of the series.

David? David? David? David? David? pic.twitter.com/O21MNNdRwn

— Jay Bauman (@JayBauman1) October 16, 2020

Think I'm going to go see Part VI tonight

Love Part VI. Perhaps the least boring/most (intentionally) funny of the bunch.

Cool. I've only ever seen the first one, but I'm going to assume that these do not need to be watched in order.

Heh, these movies do not need to be watched, period. But VI, as I saw someone put it, is at least a real movie.

vi: jason lives
vii: the new blood
ii
tie: jason takes manhattan / jason x (basically the same movie, boat vs. space)
iv: the final chapter
v: a new beginning
i
iii
jason goes to hell
reboot

weird that they all changed lol

― american bradass (BradNelson), Tuesday, April 23, 2019 3:28 PM (four years ago) bookmarkflaglink

it is time to revise my rankings:

7: the new blood
2
6: jason lives
x
takes manhattan
1
4
3
5
reboot

not ranked at all, just floating in off in its own deranged universe:
jason goes to hell

Is that worst-to-best or best-to-worst? I honestly can't tell, lol.

I do know the meta opening of reboot was pretty clever, as was the meta opening of "My Bloody Valentine" reboot.

Jason Goes to Hell is the rare horror movie I turned off back when I was a dumb teen, and again when I was an even dumber adult trying to give it a second chance

Fun fact: that is the only one I've ever seen in theaters. It was pretty shitty.

it's best to worst, obv!!!! i do need to rewatch the reboot, it's been a few years, i do remember the first twenty minutes completely ruling xxp

i love them all like they are my children though, even 5 which has the home for mentally-troubled teenagers (located just a few miles from the two most annoying hillbilly caricatures ever), one of the most fucked up landscapes in the whole series and in any slasher movie

lol, VI was so much fun. Great crowd at this screening. The deputy's "Megan..." "MEGAN!" got the best laughs.

5's kinda my favorite for how sleazy and gross it is. It's of a piece with Danny Steinmann's other works, The Unseen and Savage Streets, for sure. Some kind of minor auteur of unpleasantness and tonal whiplash.

Rata-tata-tata-tata-touie!

This whole scene is so funny. Like a parody of a clever escape scene.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=evg2Xl-tlo4

In a movie world populated mostly with morons, it doesn't take much to be the smart one.

*half the county has been brutally murdered*

Sheriff: I can't believe Tommy Jarvis would do this.

it hasn't even been a year since i last ranked the friday the 13th movies, but i went through all of them for the first time in a while because i was showing them to my roommates (aren't they so lucky to be my roommates???). so:

part vii: the new blood (i became a real john carl buechler-head over the past few years because of my love for this movie, and troll and ghoulies iii are probably the best installments of the troll and ghoulies series respectively. why is this the best friday the 13th sequel? well part of it is that i don't even think of tina as a final girl. she and jason are a split consciousness. also her cute nice boyfriend survives. so many slasher "rules" broken; for all this series has the reputation of following a strict formula pretty much every entry fucks with it or just straight up doesn't care about it???). it was clearly filmed in a winter month, maybe february, and so many of the trees are dead-looking, like these characters are running from jason through the pale blue corpse of the world)

part ii (ginny!!! is the greatest!!!! and the most charming set of campers in any slasher ever probably, you don't want to see any of them die (except paul (who doesn't die) (just disappears forever) (when i spend the whole movie wanting him to explode) (it's unfair))

part iii (just feel like i've descended to the very bones and organs of '80s slashers when i watch this; for all it's clearly a lesser, meaner retread of the second... that's why it's good)

part v: a new beginning (i ranked this really low last time... couldn't tell you why... so much cocaine in the bloodstream of this movie it's like it was filmed in snort-o-vision. the fakeout jason does not work, but the setting (gentle progressive halfway house for troubled teens) and the vibes (bad, except for the characters, who are like the last bright lights in a dead universe) are perfect to me)

friday the 13th (i actually skipped this in the runthrough because both of my roommates had already seen it, i had also watched it as recently as last october. it was this movie and sleepaway camp that made me the horror/exploitation fan i am today and it's still like so amazing how boring this movie is and yet the atmosphere is absolutely oppressively doomed, especially when it starts raining, it's like magic but really really evil magic... a death curse!!!!)

part vi: jason lives (just less in the mood for this very early sardonic horror as the years pass because i increasingly hate fun, but it is so fun and ridiculous and then somehow also has the most horrifying images in the whole series (the blood-splattered cabin))

remake/reboot (god this grew on me. there's just a clear love for nearly every previous installment of the series in it, and jason has *never* looked cooler)

jason x (idk if it's a "good" friday the 13th movie but it's a great action movie)

jason takes manhattan (really so so so dumb in like a thousand different intolerable ways, and i get a little heartbroken every time the credits start because instead of stark white credits on a black background it's now shots of manhattan and some anonymous hair metal power ballad playing behind them, really boring even in the kill department... but idk... something about it compels... i love how mean it is, and yet everyone keeps having psychedelic hallucinations of adorable young drowning jason... fundamentally the most giallo friday the 13th movie, can't hate)

freddy vs. jason (i used to hate this movie, the tone is just weird, one of the few nightmare movies to portray freddy as the actual horrible monster he is and yet it is simultaneously trying to be really, really fun? but it won me over this time, ronnie yu was the right director to bring it off)

part iv: the final chapter (used to be my favorite!!! how far it has fallen!!!! but despite some terrific casting and performances from corey feldman and crispin glover... the pacing really sucks and outside of glover the teens are *so* annoying and they're having a terrible party)

jason goes to hell (gets worse every time i see it, which is almost admirable and interesting)

Jason Goes to Hell is almost a marvel of bad filmmaking really. it fails at just about everything

Part VII tonight! I'm hoping that the crowd is as good as at VI last year.

omg i long to see part vii with a crowd

Probably posted this here somewhere. But to celebrate my birthday last year, some friends and I got together to watch movies outside with a projector and screen. I gave em a heads up on what I wanted to watch, F13th Part 4 (comfort movie + it was October), and we could figure out the second feature night of. After the movie was over, Corey Feldman pops up on screen and wishes me a happy birthday for 3 weird, rambling minutes. Birthday gift courtesy of the attendees and Cameo.

Maybe the best gift I’ve ever received? Not for whatever nonsense Feldman had to say, but the consideration and execution of it was perfect. Good friends.

We watched The Burbs next.