Cars 2

Trailer:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oFTfAdauCOo

I never saw the original Cars. But I like cars, the places they go, and the noises they make. I like european cars, they are the best

You will drive all these cars

Is it personal this time?

Pixar has had a neatness and unifying style in each of their movies, including stories with a lot of heart and written with care. This balance has achieved modern classics every time in my opinion, even if the first Cars wasn't as inventive of a story line. I'm kind of worried they've watered all of that down a bit too much judging by trailers for this one.

ah, but what if the first Cars was was inventive of a story line, hmmm?

[extra w]

xxpost

I mean...Pixar will probably drop the ball at some point? But their recent past doesn't suggest that that's gonna happen in their near future.

I find the whole idea of anthropomorphic cars deeply confusing. Like, if there are cars instead of people, why are they still built to accommodate people?

Yeah, that kind of stuff was totally distracting me all the way through the first film. If this world is totally inhabited by cars who built all the buildings? Cars can't build stuff, they don't have arms. Did there use to be humans in this world who the cars killed?

Clearly what Pixar actually needs to make is a Cars prequel, exploring these dark undertones.

"But...but who made us, Lightning?"

"And where are they now?"

In the distance, the gentle hum of a Skynet custodial ship...

The Cars world *is* distracting. No better in this film either, cf that bit in the trailer with the airport metal detector going off.

Pixar really shot themselves in the foot when they chose to skip over the lucrative ILX market in favor of kids who just wanna buy toys

Why the hell didn't Radiator Springs have a simple telephone? The truck had a phone?! Gahhh.

Of course that's distracting, but you can say the same thing about Toy Story.

But this sequel looks cheap, right along with autotuned Will.i.am parrots dancing for a whole movie. OK not that bad, but I'm worried.

I never want to see this movie

I want to see a Cars prequel about the carpocalypse, when the vehicles rose up against their human overlords and took over. Oh, wait, they made that already:

http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_lfMfXER7F-k/SaZIke79MWI/AAAAAAAAAEE/2zTGkZgfw9c/s320/maximum-overdrive.jpg

This film is already creatively bankrupt on several levels. The first "Cars" was the product of much focus grouping, to find a franchise as marketable to boys as the Princesses are to girls (mission accomplished). Then Pixar got back into bed with Disney, when Disney threatened to start churning out straight to video sequels if Pixar didn't do it themselves (mission accomplished: Toy Story 3, Cars 2, Monsters Inc 2 ...). Factor in the cultural sops of the original Cars - NASCAR, Larry the Fucking Cable Guy - and plot lift from Doc Hollywood, plus the added twist that the entire premise doesn't make a lick of sense, even on its own terms, and the whole enterprise stinks. Love me some Pixar, but even Pixar has to pay the bills.

Then Pixar got back into bed with Disney, when Disney threatened to start churning out straight to video sequels if Pixar didn't do it themselves (mission accomplished: Toy Story 3, Cars 2, Monsters Inc 2 ...)

The current part about Pixar I like the least.

I hate Disney

Not only that, Cars was used as negotiating leverage with Disney, and was the first jointly credited Disney-Pixar film. Just a sop all around.

the first cars is apparently their most profitable movie ever by a big margin when you take merchandising into account

well yeah i mean, cars

Zactly. I have two girls, but I know parents with boys who have been decked out in Cars swag since birth.

Yeah, that kind of stuff was totally distracting me all the way through the first film. If this world is totally inhabited by cars who built all the buildings? Cars can't build stuff, they don't have arms. Did there use to be humans in this world who the cars killed?

― Inevitable stupid samba mix (chap), Wednesday, June 15, 2011 2:18 AM (8 hours ago) Bookmark

http://agent44.com/blog2/wp-content/images/insidelightning.jpg

http://www.usatoday.com/money/advertising/2006-05-25-cars-usat_x.htm

as the father of a 3 year old, I've probably seen cars at least 20-30 times. There is just so much about the world the movie is set in that doesn't make any sense at all. The fact that cars can't build themselves is only a small part of it.

Anyway, I hope Cars 2 is fun, because I'm pretty sure I'm gonna watch it a bunch of times.

at some point in the movie, Mac says "thank the manufacturer! you're alive!", which indicates there is some sort of Car religion and origin story.

Yeah, despite my comments above re: the (mostly) ever-increasing quality of Pixar's output, I never saw the first Cars and don't feel terribly compelled to see the new one. Even despite the fact that I've actually gone out of my way to see their movies for the past several years now.

I find the whole idea of anthropomorphic cars deeply confusing. Like, if there are cars instead of people, why are they still built to accommodate people?

― You Post on ILX (Simon H.), Wednesday, June 15, 2011 6:13 AM (10 hours ago) Bookmark

^^^see my meltdown on the first CARS thread

I lvoe sitting there criticizing cartoons my daughter is watching - I think it will help her in life to develop critical thinking
"Dora's head is way bigger than diegos"
"No - Dora is smaller! " frowning eyebrows

_Cars_, the newest one from Pixar

^^^everybody acting like I am crazy for not accepting premise of anthropomorphized car world

Mr Jay Batman had no good answer for that question either, so I sb'd him.

Dora though, wtf, her head is three times the size of her own mother's. I hope mom had the episiotomy.

Questions I ask kids all the time: why do the Transformers need to change into cars and stuff when they can just stay giant indestructible robots? Why doesn't everybody in Star Wars carry a lightsaber? Why doesn't Harry use magic to correct his vision?

harry potter question is a good one

nerd chic?

This film is already creatively bankrupt on several levels. The first "Cars" was the product of much focus grouping, to find a franchise as marketable to boys as the Princesses are to girls (mission accomplished). [...] Factor in the cultural sops of the original Cars - NASCAR, Larry the Fucking Cable Guy - and plot lift from Doc Hollywood, plus the added twist that the entire premise doesn't make a lick of sense, even on its own terms, and the whole enterprise stinks. Love me some Pixar, but even Pixar has to pay the bills.

― Josh in Chicago, Wednesday, June 15, 2011 6:56 AM (5 hours ago) Bookmark

i dunno, i was all prepared to hate cars, skipped it until well after wall-e, but wound up enjoying it quite a bit. it's certainly not the best thing pixar's ever done (nemo!), but nor is it any sort of dark blot on their resume. despite the obvious focus grouping, toy marketing emphasis, and cultural sops to stuff i hate ― despite even the basic incoherence of the premise ― it works damn well as animated kids' entertainment. it's funny, smart, light of touch, fast-paced but still character-driven, visually inventive & appealing, etc.

there are logical answer
1. transformers want to stay hidden from man and they can drive faster than walk
2 Harry couldnt fix his eyes becuasethere is no spell for that
3people thought lightsabers were gay so they carried blasters

4 Doras head is the size of a pumpkin

contenderizer gives a pass to cars, can't stand darjeeling limited... ohkayyyyy

"deep taste", iirc

The lightsaber one seems pretty obvious. It's the same reason most wars aren't fought with swords anymore.

if people could easily swat bullets out of the air with swords tho

Only jedi know how to make and use lightsabres ffs.

they don't look that hard to use

omg that original "Cars" argument

easy to chop off your cock with a light saber if your not careful

... I suppose there's that

contenderizer gives a pass to cars, can't stand darjeeling limited... ohkayyyyy

― lots of janitors have something to say (Shakey Mo Collier), Wednesday, June 15, 2011 12:26 PM (2 minutes ago) Bookmark

honestly, i think lots of people hate cars for all the wrong reasons. they seem to sneer at its association with stuff like larry the cable guy and NASCAR, reject it on the basis of cultural positioning or the success of its toys, which seems sad to me. taken as a movie, there's little to hate ― unless you just don't like pixar in general. not saying it's great, mind. it's probably my least favorite pixar flick, but not by some massive margin.

I don't think discouraging the career of Larry the Cable Guy is ever wrong.

yeah, sure, but he's a harmless buffoon, and pretty damn good in cars.

I don't think he's harmless. I think he, along with ppl like Carlos Mencia, are emblematic of almost everything I hate about America.

yeah I don't think that shit is harmless

otoh no I don't really like pixar either.

other things (glenn beck and rev fred phelps for instance) are representative of everything i hate about america. larry the cable guy would have been a bit player on hee-haw back in the day. i'm cool with the existence of hee-haw & NASCAR.

mencia is waaaaaay more annoying & legit offensive besides.

kind of hate the knee-jerk lib tendency to conflate everything associated with red-state american culture with its most toxic manifestations.

you are an asshole

i'm cool with the existence of hee-haw

yeah but Hee Haw had Buck Owens! by contrast Whitney is just a shitty opportunist with shitty politics whose meal ticket happens to be playing a hick.

David Cross' takedown of Larry the Cable Guy = OTM imho

I just dont like when people say GITERDONE

here:

Thursday, December 01, 2005
AN OPEN LETTER TO LARRY THE CABLE GUY

Hi everybody!

The following is a letter I wrote after picking up Git-R-Done - The Larry The Cable Guy Story (ghost written by Susan Sontag). I have to warn you that it's nearly 11 pages long. But I think it's chock full of life lessons for all of us and if you're not careful... you just might learn something!

An open letter to Larry The Cable Guy:

Hello Larry,

It's me, David Cross. Recently I was shooting something for my friends at "Wonder Showzen" (the funniest, most subversive comedy on American T.V. at the moment) and when we were taking a break one of the guys on the show asked me if I had seen some article in something somewhere wherein you were interviewed to promote your new book "Please-Git-R-Done" (published by Crown Books $23.95 U.S.) and they asked about your devoting a chapter to slamming me and the "P.C. Left". Since I stopped following your career shortly after you stopped going on stage wearing a tool belt with cable wrapped around your neck (around your appearance at "Laffs 'n' Food" in Enid, Oklahoma Aug 23-26 1999?) I said I wasn't aware of the article. They went on to tell me that you said basically (and I am not quoting but paraphrasing their recall) that I could kiss your ass, that I've never been to one of your shows (true) and that I didn't know your audience (untrue).

SO, I went and got your book, "Gitting-R-Donned", and excitedly skimmed past the joke about that one time you farted and something farty happened, on past the thing about the fat girl who farted and finally found it, . Well, needless to say I farted. I farted up a fartstorm right there in the Flyin' J Travel Center. I fartingly bought the book and took it home with an excitement I haven't experienced since I got Bertha Chudfarter's Grandma drunk and she took her teeth out and blew me as I was finger banging her while wearing a Jesus sock puppet in the back of the boiler room at The Church of the Redeemer off I-20 (I don't care who you are, that's funny.)

Anyhoo, I got home and read the good parts. It seems that you were pissed off at Rolling Stone magazine, and I can understand why. You made some good points in your argument as well. I agree that there is an eliteism and bias in the press and too often a writer will include asides to show the readers how smart he or she is and how "above it" they are. But come on! Surely you can't be surprised, or worse, hurt or offended by this. You even say in the book that you knew what you were getting into (Rolling Stone being all "lefty" and whatnot). Certainly I'm not surprised that they took a ten minute phone conversation with me and chose to print only the most inflammatory paragraph within it. That's what they do.

But I want to address some of the things you write about me in "Git-to-Gittin'-r-Done". In response to the Rolling Stone article, but first let me say this; you are very mistaken if you think that I don't know your audience. Hell, I could've been heckled by the parents of some of the very people that come see you now. I grew up in Roswell, Georgia (near the Funny Bone and not far from The Punch Line). The very first time I went on stage was at The Punch Line in Sandy Springs in 1982 when I was 17. I cut my teeth in the south and my first road gigs ever were in Augusta, Charleston, Baton Rouge, and Louisville. I remember them very well, specifically because of the audience. I remember thinking (occasionally, not all the time) "what a bunch of dumb redneck, easily entertained, ignorant motherfuckers. I can't believe the stupid shit they think is funny." So, yes, I do know your audience, and they suck. And they're simple. And please don't mistake this as coming from a place of bitterness because I didn't "make it" there or, I'm not as successful as you because that's not it at all. Since I was a kid I've always been a little over sensitive to the glorification and rewarding of dumb. The "salt of the earth, regular, every day folk" (or lowest common denominator) who see the world, and the people like me in it, as on some sort of secular mission to take away their flag lapels and plaster-of-paris jesus television adornments strike me as childishly paranoid. But perhaps the funniest (oddest) thing in your book is you taking me to task for being P.C. Have you heard my act?! I'll match your un-P.C.ness any day of the week my friend. I truly believe, and have said onstage amongst other things that, orthodox Jews are bar none, the most annoying people, as a group, that walk this earth. I absolutely refuse to say the term "African-American". It's a ridiculous and ill-applied label that was accepted with a thoughtless rush just to make white people feel at ease and slightly noble. I also believe that in the right setting that, as unfortunate as it may be, retarded people can be a near constant source of entertainment (fact!). Larry, whether northern, southern, straight, gay, male, female, liberal, conservative, Christian or Jew, I've walked them all. It didn't matter if it was a room full of "enlightened" hippie lesbian wicans at Catch A Rising Star in Cambridge, MA or literally hundreds of students at the University of St. Louis (a Jesuit school) or a roomful of the cutest, angriest frat boys in Baton Rouge all threatening to beat me up, I un-P.C.'d the shit out of them. That's another thing that bothers me too. I honestly believe that if we had worked a week together at whatever dumb-ass club in American Strip Mall #298347 in God's Country U.S.A and hung out that week and got good and drunk after the shows, that you and I would've been making each other laugh (I imagine we would have politely disagreed on a few things) but not only would we be laughing but we'd often be laughing at the expense of some of the audience members at that nights show and you know it. I'll address your easy, bullshit sanctimonious "don't mess with my audience" crap further on. But for now, let's "Gittle-R-Ding-Dong-Done!"

Okay, here's what I said in the RS interview: "He's good at what he does. It's a lot of anti-gay, racist humor -- which people like in America - all couched in 'I'm telling it like it is.' He's in the right place at the right time for that gee-shucks, proud-to-be-a-redneck, I'm-just-a-straight-shooter-multimillionaire-in-cutoff-flannel, selling-ring tones-act. That's where we are as a nation now. We're in a state of vague American values and anti-intellectual pride."

You took umbrage at my calling a lot of your act anti-gay and racist and said that "...according to Cross and the politically correct police, any white comedians who mention the word 'black' or say something humorous but faintly negative about any race are racists."

Well, first of all, your act is racist. Maybe not all the time, but it certainly can be. Here, let me quote you back, word for word, some of your "faintly negative" humor and I'll let people judge for themselves.

Re: Abu Ghraib Torture -

"Let me ask some of these commie rag head carpet flying wicker basket on the head balancing scumbags something!"

Re: Having a Muslim cleric give the opening prayer at the Republican Convention -

"What the hell is this the cartoon network? The Republicans had a muslim give the opening prayer at there (sic) convention! What the hell's going on around here! Is Muslim now the official religion of the United States!... First these peckerheads ( Ironically, "peckerhead" was a derogatory word slaves and their offspring used to describe white people) fly planes into towers and now theys (sic) prayin' before conventions! People say not all of em did that and I say who gives a rats fat ass! That's a fricken slap in the face to New York city by having some muslim sum-bitch give the invocation at the republican convention! This country pretty much bans the Christian religion (the religion of George Washington and John Wayne) virtually from anything public and then they got us watchin' this muslim BS!! Ya wanna pray to allah then drag yer flea infested ass over to where they pray to allah at!" End Quote. So... yeah. There you go. This quote goes on and on but my favorite part is when you say towards the end, "...now look, I love all people (except terrorist countries that want to kill us)..."

There are numerous examples and I don't think I need to reprint any more. You get the idea. Oh, what the hell, here's one more - "They're dead, get over it! Poor little sandy asses! I'm sure all them dead folks'd they'd killed give 40 shekels or whatever kinda money these inbred sumbitches use, but I'd give 40 of 'em whatever it is to be humiliated instead of dead!"

Okay Larry The Cable Guy, I will ignore the irony of a big ole southern redneck character actually using "inbred" as an insult, as well as the fact that a shekel is currency from Israel, the towel heads sworn enemy. But at least you're passionate about what you see as inhumane injustice (not on a global level of course, but on a national level) and the simple black and white of what's right and what's wrong. It's kinda like you're this guy who speaks for all these poor, unfortunate souls out there who wear shirts with blue collars on them, work hard all day to put food on the table for their family (unlike people who wear shirts with white collars or wear scrubs or t-shirts or dresses or costumes that consist of flannel shirts with the sleeves cut-off and old trucker hats) and pray to the American Flag of Jesus to protect them from the evils of muslims, queers, illegal immigrants, and the liberal jews who run Hollywood and the media. I guess one could say that you're "telling it like it is". And considering the vast amount of over-simplification you employ to describe with sweeping generalizations, all of America and the World that "don't make no sense to you", as well as your lack of sensitivity, and second grade grammar, one might be led to think that you are somewhat proud of not appearing (or being) too intellectual. Combine that with your sucker appeal to the knee-jerk white Christian patriot in us all who would much rather hear 87 fart jokes than hear a joke in which the President (the current one, not the last one) or the Pope, or Born-Again Christians, or Lee Greenwood get called on their shit for being the hypocrites that they are, and I think we've got a winner!

About being Anti-Gay. I honestly take that back. I do not think that you are anti-gay, I didn't choose those words wisely. Your stuff isn't necessarily anti-gay but rather stupid and easy. "Madder than a queer with lock jaw on Valentines Day." That's not that funny, I don't care who you are. It's just sooo easy. I mean, over half the planet sucks dick so why gays? Why not truck stop whores, or Hollywood Starlets or housewives? Because when you say "queer" you get an easy laugh. End of story.

As for being a multi-millionaire in disguise, that's just merely a matter of personal taste for me. I do not begrudge you your money at all, it is sincerely hard earned and you deserve whatever people want to give to you. What sticks in my craw about that stuff is the blatant and (again, personal taste) gross marketing and selling of this bullshit character to your beloved fans. Now look, if someone wants to pay top dollar to come to one of your shows and then drop a couple hundred more on "Git-R-Done" lighters and hats and t-shirts and windshield stickers and trailer hitches and beer koozies and fishing hats and shot glasses etc, then good for you. I just think it's a little crass and belies the "good ole boy" blue collar thing you represent. But that's no big deal.

Now, as for the last statement that "We're in a state of vague American values and anti-intellectual pride."

Well, I think that's true. When you can rally the troops (so to speak) with a lazy, "latte drinking, tofu eating" generalization of Liberals and "Back ass rag fags" to describe Arabs, then, yeah, I think that falls in the "ignorant" category. I think that with even the slightest attention to the double standard and hypocrisy of both the Left and the Right in this country (if not all of the Christian Extremists as a whole) coupled with the bullshit they lazily swallow and parrot back while happily ignoring the gross inhumane treatment of those that aren't them so that we may have cheap sneakers and oil and slightly less taxes (although I'm sure the bracket you're in now gives you a ton of tax money back), then you could maybe see my point. Now here's the best part - in your book you preface the above quote by saying, "...but I guess I'm not as intellectual as David Cross. In that Rolling Stone article, he sure showed us what a deep thinker he is by sayin' "America is in a stage of vague intellectual pride." Jesus Christ can you even fucking read?! Whoever read that article to you butchered the actual quote. The quote that was right fucking in front of their face! I would fire your official reader and have them replaced with a Hooters Girl who doesn't fart. That way you have something nice to look at while you are getting your misinformation.

As for "anti-intellectual pride", that is Larry The Cable Guy in spades. Let me quote you again (from an on-line interview, "I consider my jokes to be very jeuvinille (sic). Stuff a 14 year old would laugh at because that's the ...sence (sic) of humor I have.". Hmmm, okay. That was easy.

Well, I suppose I've already covered part of that in the above. But you also specifically dumb down your speech while making hundreds of purposefully grammatical errors. How do I know this? It's on page 17 of your book wherein you describe how you would "Larry" up your commentaries for radio. What does it mean to "Larry" something up? Take a wild guess. The reason you feel the need to "Larry" something up? Because you are not that dumb. I mean you, Dan Whitney, the guy who's name the bank account is under. You were born and raised in Nebraska (hardly The South), went to private school and moved to Florida when you were 16. This is when you developed your accent?! Not exactly the developmental years are they? At age 16 that's the kind of thing you have to make a concerted effort to adopt. Did you hire a voice coach? Or were you like one of those people who go to England for a week and come back sounding like an extra from "Lock Stock and Two Smoking Barrels"? As you said yourself in an interview once, "I can pop in and out of it pretty much whenever I want". In your book on page 89 you say in reference to the "gee-shucks" millionaire comment, "...see, to his (David's) mind, bein' well paid means I'm no longer real and I can't be a country boy anymore. It's just an act." Hey, it's always been an act! That's my fucking point! You admit it yourself so cut the indignation shit. And I am in no way deriding your work ethic. You clearly have more fart jokes than most and for that I applaud you. You go on to talk about how hard you work and life on the road and living on Waffle House and blah, blah, blah. Yeah, I get it, we’ve all been there and played shitty, degrading gigs and sacrificed etc, etc. Then you say, "...this (the personal attack) was different because David basically hammered my fans in that RS article by implying that they were ignorant. He crossed the line when he railed against them, so I had to tell ya what I felt about that. He can hammer me all he wants, but when he screwed with my fans, it was time for me to say something." Aww, that's so sweet and egregious. I can't stand that fan ass kissing bullshit. You and Dane Cook ought to get together and have a "my-fan's-are-the-greatest-people-on-earth-and-that's-why-I-do-this" off. You could both sell a shit load of merch too. But having said that, I would truly love to get some of your fans and my fans in a room together to debate some of the finer points on comedy, music, culture, the issues facing our country today and just about anything else we might find worthy of discussion. My fans are pretty smart as well. They are also, I imagine, as "hard-working" as your fans. Not all of them of course, but most. And I'm sure that they may come up with some genuinely interesting, insightful points (and would do so without spouting a bunch of meaningless Christian platitudes). And if you really, truly want to respect your fans, lower your ticket price as well as the price of your ubiquitous merchandise. I'm sure all those hard-working Americans could use the extra money now that the budgets are being cut drastically from Transportation, Education, Health and Human Services, HUD, Dept of the Interior, EPA, Farm Service Agency, FEMA, Agricultural, FDA, VA, FDA, FHA, National Center for Environmental Health, and numerous other departments and agencies that they might directly rely on for help. All so that we can pay off this massive tax cut during "war" time that we're all getting (them not so much though). Oh well, that's just one of those "political" things that I think about occasionally.

Anyway, I just wanted to address the stuff you wrote about me and clear some things up. Mostly the air around here... I just farted!!!!!

Think-Of-Something-To-Do-And-See-That-Task-To-Completion!!!!!

Fart,
David Cross

what if you think david cross is an asshole too?

I like my assholes funny

larry the cable guy is a hoot and a holler

you are an asshole

― anarcho-misogynist puppies (DJP), Wednesday, June 15, 2011 1:03 PM (12 minutes ago) Bookmark

not sure this was necessary?

maybe he thinks you're funny?

not like larry the cable guy funny, more like goldie hawn on laugh-in funny

not sure this was necessary?

I am 100% sure this was not necessary:

kind of hate the knee-jerk lib tendency to conflate everything associated with red-state american culture with its most toxic manifestations.

you don't know a fucking thing about me

this is in no way git-n'er done

got bored and ended up watching a bit of a larry the cable guy movie on comedy central, surprised to find it was rather endearing and not outwardly offensive. i think it was the health inspector one.

then again, the only larry the cable guy shit i've been exposed to has been very tame - not that i've dug at all deep. i'll take david cross's word for it that the shit is foul and stand corrected.

so fine, you got me. fuck cars on general principle*. which maybe = fuck pixar, too, but i'll dodge that bullet and defer to the "fuck disney" that i've been saying for years.

* the movie isn't bad, but yeah, it's hard to square "commie rag head carpet flying wicker basket on the head balancing scumbags" with anything even remotely acceptable.

you haven't lived til you've seen the one where he goes to Iraq and blows up a camel

xp

bing crosby was blowing up camels decades ago. y'all too sensetive.

you don't know a fucking thing about me

― anarcho-misogynist puppies (DJP), Wednesday, June 15, 2011 1:21 PM (3 minutes ago) Bookmark

nor do i claim to.

not like larry the cable guy funny, more like goldie hawn on laugh-in funny

― strongo hulkington's ghost dad, Wednesday, June 15, 2011 1:19 PM (7 minutes ago) Bookmark

zing

got bored and ended up watching a bit of a larry the cable guy movie on comedy central, surprised to find it was rather endearing and not outwardly offensive. i think it was the health inspector one.

that is par for the course with all of these guys; Mencia on his own show is a toxic canker sore, but Mencia in a stupid movie with Forrest Whitaker and America Ferrera* was almost entirely harmless (not that that movie itself didn't SUUUUUUUUUUCK)

* no I'm not kidding

man goldie hawn was hilarious. in no way a zing.

plus if you were goldie hawn in laugh-in you'd get to do the watusi in a bikini with stuff painted on you like "FREE LOVE" and "BAN THE BOMB" and "I'M SORRY I'LL GIVE BIRTH TO KATE HUDSON ONE DAY."

lol

Not sure that would fit very aesthetically.

lol I did not realize that the unfamous dude on "Rules of Engagement" is her son

not gonna lie, i think we could turn our foreign policy around if we had a sketch comedy show with painted bikini girls again.

sincere apologies, dan. i wasn't up to speed on larry the cable guy, and made unfair assumptions based on that ignorance. mea culpa.

no worries, I probably shouldn't have snapped so strongly

now that's git-n'er-done!

I do have to say, watching that trailer, I was brought straight the eff out of it every time I heard Larry the Cable Guy's voice. I'm not sure I could endure an entire feature film's length of that.

Not because of his voice, but because it's his voice, if you get me.

not gonna lie, i think we could turn our foreign policy around if we had a sketch comedy show with painted bikini girls again

how does The Man Show fit into this theory

were they painted with pithy countercultural slogans?

Adam Carrolla in a bikini could start a cultural revolution

xpost Han Solo uses a lightsaber to open up that Tan Tan belly. You'd think it'd be a handy thing to have around, even if you can't swat laser bullets out of the air. Re: Transformers, why do they need to hide from people, who can do them no harm? Besides, the stride of a 300 foot tall robot >>> a car on the highway - why use the road when you can step over the traffic? And if they can regrow Harry Potter's bones, they can correct his vision. But the Halloween costumes would be less distinctive.

I will say that the first Cars is gorgeous to watch, and ultimately harmless, albeit as thrilling as an actual NASCAR race, which is to say - not. It is also the rare animated film without a villain or dead parent, so there's that. But it's still lame.

xpost Han Solo uses a lightsaber to open up that Tan Tan belly. You'd think it'd be a handy thing to have around, even if you can't swat laser bullets out of the air.

so its like a boxcutter that you're highly likely to accidentally kill yourself with

it's more like a pocket-size nuclear blowtorch. something no man should be without.

Are you any more likely to kill yourself with a light saber than you are a laser gun? In a galaxy far, far away, they should require all light saber users to take safety classes and carry a permit at all times.

Like, could you indeed use it to open a hatch door like a can opener? That would be useful. Anyway, Cars: meh.

More on the harmlessness of ol' Larry: http://www.avclub.com/articles/witless-protection,3082/

Larry the Cable Guy isn't particularly bad as that tow truck voice. He's just bad on principle.

This is even better than the other link: http://www.avclub.com/articles/i-watched-this-on-purpose-witless-protection,2382/

I place him in the same category as that assclown Jeff Dunham: making xenophobia and casual racism acceptable again for Middle America.

This can't be posted enough:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CuBVIDKbJF0

Like, it would be one thing (although no less defensible) if he actually had some lower class southern background that had informed his xenophobia, but the fact that it seems to all be an opportunistic put-on is kinda next-level horrifying to me.

I'm completely unaware of this guy outside of the Cars movies but I find him hard to bear in an entire movie where his character is basically the main focus and not just the comic relief.

They'll be shooting rockets at each other and flying around and there'll be explosions and they use bidets it'll be so COOL I hope there are kickflips and teal/orange and someone gets kicked in the NUTS (car nuts) then falls DOWN LOLOL

Basically, yeah, they have to do something a bit marketable to the masses, but they've been so good at remaining tasteful and heartfelt and creative- even with the first Cars. I'm worried that this might be the first movie that does away with too much of their reliable integrity.

It's a trailer. Trailers are often wonderfully wild misrepresentations of their attendant films.

are there bidet jokes in this? do cars desire to wash their car assholes

True about trailers, the whole plot is worrisome though.

Yeah I saw a bidet gag in one trailer.

Cars 1 is one of my least favorite pixar movies but the new one looks fine and I will go see it with my son and have a good time.

It's very very possible that Cars was the result of focus grouping, etc. But it's also very possible that it wasn't. Because everything I've ever seen about John Lasseter tells me that he is a huge car and NASCAR fan.

My boys are going nuts in anticipation of this movie. Pretty much every conversation we have turns to Cars 2, or to how much they would like to purchase a toy based on something from Cars 2. Doesn't help that there are billboards all over town, and plastered onto buses, etc. I'll probably be there opening day - take 'em out of preschool for the afternoon...

the main thing I didn't like about Cars was the music. It had some over-earnest nu-country song (maybe more than one). Pixar is usually very very sensitive about their use of songs in films; I only remember Toy Story 2 having the sarah mclachlan "when she loved me" song in the middle of the movie, but don't really remember anything else being in the middle of the film. but Cars does, and it's lame.

anyway, Disney has already gone ahead with their own sequel 'set in the universe' of cars, called Planes, which is coming next year. There is a trailer for it around somewhere. It looks dumb. Pixar don't want anything to do with it and their name isn't attached at all, though Lasseter (because he is also the head of animation for Disney) is in the PR stuff.

here it is:

http://www.wired.com/geekdad/2011/06/new-from-pixar-er-disney-comes-planes/

so don't bitch about cars looking lame until you see this.

"xpost Han Solo uses a lightsaber to open up that Tan Tan belly. You'd think it'd be a handy thing to have around, even if you can't swat laser bullets out of the air. Re: Transformers, why do they need to hide from people, who can do them no harm? Besides, the stride of a 300 foot tall robot >>> a car on the highway - why use the road when you can step over the traffic? And if they can regrow Harry Potter's bones, they can correct his vision. But the Halloween costumes would be less distinctive."
1 Han said "this gay thing can open a beast belly" then used his macho blaster
2 transformers find it aesthetically pleasing also to be a porsche
3 everyone wanted potter to stay nerdy looking

I just love Pixar and have such a high opinion of their work, and their gigantic success was always overwhelming evidence that you didn't have to make something cheap to appeal to the masses. Just concerned because I'm a big fan.

I find the habit of Pixar's ace computer animation coming closer and closer to the Hollywood action films they've typically existed as an alternative to = - in storyboarding, in rapid edits, in execution and "stunts"/"effects"- a little troubling, or at least disappointing. Like, just because it's Woody or whatever flying through the air in slow motion, fireball exploding behind him, doesn't make it any less lame a cliche, wink or no. The new Cars looks like even more of that shit. So I guess it comes down to the script.

Wow, the Onion AV Club REALLY DOES NOT LIKE Larry teh Cable Guy:

It’s never easy coping with the death of an icon, especially for a franchise as intimately associated with that icon as Cars was with Paul Newman. Yet in a shocking miscalculation, the usually brilliant folks over at Pixar coped with Newman’s death in the stupidest possible way—by transforming John Lasseter’s shiny love letter to the automobile into an unabashed vehicle for the hayseed comedy stylings of Larry The Cable Guy. Larry The Cable Guy’s hillbilly tow truck Mater must have sold a lot of toys and played like gangbusters for focus-group respondents, because Cars 2 makes the vehicular redneck its proud centerpiece. That leaves Owen Wilson, the film’s ostensible star, to fret about the state of his relationship with his best friend Mater. Itchy & Scratchy Studios didn’t push Poochie on audiences the way Cars 2 does Mater.

AO Scott calls Cars 2's Mater "Pixar's Jar Jar Binks"

http://movies.nytimes.com/2011/06/24/movies/pixars-cars-2-with-larry-the-cable-guy-and-owen-wilson-review.html

reviews across the board are lackluster at best, I keep seeing 'worst pixar movie ever by a fair margin' . i'm still going to see it this weekend but I don't have my hopes up very high since I don't like the first movie at all either.

on the other hand, ebert liked it.

the female car must have a great ski rack

Got tickets for tomorrow with my boys. They will love this crap.

There were loads of great reviews on Rotten Tomatoes at first (including one that said there were lots of great puns - there aren't, unless you count written ones). Kind of weird but they're now balanced out a bit. Still, worth the admission price for the teaser trailer...

And the teaser trailer is for...?

Brave! Which is next summer's release. Should be before the 3d showings and before most 2d ones, iirc. Plus, Hawaaian Vacation Toy Story short.

You mean even the short is a sequel? ARGH.

I dread the day this makes it to dvd, I'm probably going to end up seeing it 100 times.

I applaud Michael Caine's guts in taking a voice job in this, when the last one killed Paul Newman.

ok this sucked. in a year with good animated non-pixar films like Rango and Kung Fu Panda 2, utterly missable.

the toy story cartoon was good though.

My kids loved the shit out of this:

http://farm6.static.flickr.com/5075/5868030211_f784c75f2a.jpg
Ben at Cars 2 by disbister, on Flickr

it was better than gnomeo and juliet, I will give it that.