rolling FIRST WORLD PROBLEMS thread

Home for the holidays and wanted to watch Kurosawa's Ran on mom's big TV. Netflix sent me the Masterworks restoration instead of the far superior Criterion disc.

http://matouenpeluche.typepad.com/.a/6a00e554e97d5c8834013110006574970c-800wi

http://i51.tinypic.com/bjwqa.jpg

u writing another book bro?

spent a whole day agonizing over the final few spots of my ballot for a music critic poll

s1sk downloads signing off in the middle of downloads and never coming back

anyone who thinks these problems are first world is poor

pancakes this morning were a little salty

I have cholera

as long as the oxen are fine we're good

Someone started a trypophobia thread and I don't know if I can stop myself from clicking on it.

Listen to me on this one. DO NOT OPEN IT. Trust me. You'll regret it.

^^^

triphophobia

recognize the poison in our board

nagging feeling of near-impotent guilt re: the 1bn ppl living in poverty

xps i seriously SERIOUSLY wish i had never opened that thread - i still get a queasy feeling when i even think about it :/

It is horrendous.

Yeah, I probably won't. I hope.

Really don't. I didn't know what it meant. I backed out as quickly as possible.damage wasn't quite done, but nearly

http://farm2.static.flickr.com/1406/1093460880_2af2500cc8.jpg

oh shit wrong thread

oh fuck you grady

Ban grady!

give him one day for every lotus hole

UNBAN GR8080

yah i read that thread and u all r crazy they are just holes in things

if bein freaked out by that insane alien nonsense is crazy well mister I just don't wanna be sane.

lol!!!

Aren't at least half of escalators broken?

And post offices, DMVs, and other public offices always have multiple service windows, yet way too few people working at these windows to serve the long line of customers.

haha i caught myself getting pissed off at broken escalators yesterday

three words: single core processor

Escalators don't become broken they become stairs. Rip Mitch Hedberg.

Aren't at least half of escalators broken?

The escalator in my building seems to break down at least once a week.

Escalators don't become broken they become stairs. Rip Mitch Hedberg.

― À la recherche du temps Pardew (jim in glasgow), Tuesday, January 11, 2011 8:54 AM (32 minutes ago) Bookmark

rip indeed, but:

http://img3.photographersdirect.com/img/13725/wm/pd1118986.jpg

^^^so sick of seeing this in the buildings surrounding my workplace/where i take lunchbreaks

this thread is the definition of first world problems

I HATE APPLE

went with my sister to the local pastry shop -- upon exiting, she exclaimed with dismay "they put my petit fours in the same box as your tiramisu!"

reddening — what does yr name refer to?

because earlier today I had this idea about a video game where at certain points you might be like moving down a long hallway and suddenly you find that you can't turn your character around or walk backwards or even see what's behind you, because [ghosts/magic/whatever] — then I saw yr name just now and I went "GUH?"

(possibly I saw it earlier and subconsciously remembered it?)

It's from a flash game called Johnny in an art game?, which is parodying games like One Chance and Every Day the Same Dream where you kind of march forward into your destiny. I think it was just the parody-maker being lazy, though, since you can turn around in both those games!

someone told me that escalators are extremely power-hungry and incredibly environmentally unfriendly as a result.

escalators are everywhere in HK, and we've got some reaaaaaallly big ones.

and some reeeeally freaking tiny ones.

I don't remember where it was now but there was an escalator that was seriously about three steps long. 'er indoors is short and it was only about half her height. Then there's that eight-storey fucken thing in Mong Kok. If you fall you are dead.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AothOuCTCM0

Hong Kong escalators

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RUf-2NvxogE&feature=related

was listening to a tech podcast from CES this year and people were complaining that they'll have to upgrade their flatscreen TVs every 3-4 years now since the technology is changing so rapidly

sometimes i have to switch my QC3s to the 'lo' setting before i plug them into staticky speaker outlets. then, when i unplug them, the volume plays way louder than i thought it would and startles me for like half a second :( :( :( :( :( :(

my debit card expired so now i've had to re-enter the number on tons of websites -- also my netflix rotation got thrown off by two days

Debatable coaching decisions are really hampering my fantasy basketball team

sandwich lady forgot to cut my sandwich

This website is dedicated to watching Internet Explorer 6 usage drop to less than 1% worldwide, so more websites can choose to drop support for Internet Explorer 6, saving hours of work for web developers

have you guys seen the movie barcode thing yet? has dr.morbz seen it?

There needs to be some way of searching. Trying to find if they've done the Umbrellas of Cherbourg.

― emil.y, Monday, March 7, 2011 8:46 PM (1 hour ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

Ha!

(Wouldn't really consider it a problem, more a thought that I had whilst looking at a site and decided to share with ilx. I should shut up more, I guess)

it was just funny to me tbh

http://img3.photographersdirect.com/img/13725/wm/pd1118986.jpg

You know, when they do this, it's probably because they're going to do maintenance on it or because it's unsafe to walk on it.

OTOH, I have read that climbing a still escalator results in people tripping because the steps are taller than stair steps, so maybe they're cutting their liability.

there are so many poorly designed toilet paper dispensers/holders in public restrooms

mild insomnia so I'm drinking some beer

i feel like trying to alleviate mild insomnia w/ alcohol is something done across all worlds?

Terrible iPod Days

nytimes.com sign-in bullshit

haha, just came in here to post my gf this morning

"oh my god, did you see this, a nuclear plane exploded in Japan and... NO, NEW YORK TIMES I DONT WANT TO LOG IN!"

This website is dedicated to watching Internet Explorer 6 usage drop to less than 1% worldwide, so more websites can choose to drop support for Internet Explorer 6, saving hours of work for web developers

Sending this off to the shower of bastards that run our web-based back office system who claim they can't support anything above IE6!! Because it's so "stable"!! Well, so's an abacus!!

Missed my yoga class because I forgot to turn the clock back.

thats a great one

anytime anyone on ilx has ever said "this poll is impossible"

I am so sick of lodges where the dining room area flows difficultly into the living room.

― Sheneneh et Caro (Stevie D(eux)), Saturday, March 19, 2011 8:04 PM (1 minute ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

Should sub-boards be removed?

i went out for a bagel because of this thread and the only decent bagel place i know of closed at 4 and i had to eat all these other foods to compensate and i am still unsatisfied

― horseshoe, Sunday, March 20, 2011 6:16 PM (50 minutes ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

bought box of weet-bix cereal, box won't fit into commemorative weet-bix 2010 world cup tin - might have to eat the top row, cut off the excess section of box and stick it back into the tin but honestly who wants to do that??

The electricity was out this morning and my first thought was "How am I going to get the car out of the garage?"

Car door openers have an emergency release, silly

I mean, GARAGE door openers

Unsure of the nearest place to buy blank CDs

I'm angry because I'm tired of both Panera and Au Bon Pain and they're the nearest options for lunch. Bah.

I know there's a manual way to open a garage door. I just couldn't picture it in my mind.

And, there's the additional problem I was going to have of being forced to park the car in the driveway, walk back to the garage, pull the door down securely and the get back in the car. Fortunately, the power came back on before that nightmare scenario took place.

being bored of available food is like the quintessential first world problem. sometimes i try to remind myself that i have access to a wider variety of food than most monarchs throughout history. i have a pineapple in my fridge at home. it's unheard of from a historical (and geographical) perspective to have that kind of access to exotic foods. (and assuming a solution isn't found for peak oil, we may be in a unique moment of history past and future where these things are affordable and available). xp

being bored of available food is like the quintessential first world problem

I know - that's why I posted it!

lol of course. i'm agreeing w/ u :P

Hmm, Panera, maybe I'll go there for lunch.

if only henry viii had panera, maybe wed all be catholic

-ran out of coffee this morning, had to go to mcdonalds

-no one wants to turn my tumblr into a book deal

been thinking abt this thread a lot, being in a real 3rd world country for the month.

some submissions:

- waiters will never, ever, under any circumstances, bring you your check (or even ask if you want it) until you directly ask them for it. even if your food is bagged up and there is money on the table.

- internet cafes that only have IE

- using alt-gr for the @ sign and bbcode []

- having to wait until the bus is full before you leave

- FALSE GRANOLA (made w/puffed rice)

- no running water except from 5 am to 9 am

- waiters will never, ever, under any circumstances, bring you your check (or even ask if you want it) until you directly ask them for it. even if your food is bagged up and there is money on the table.

never had my cheque brought to me unsolicited before (and have only been asked if i wanted the cheque on a handful of occasions).

i like referring to the bill as "la dolorosa" when i'm in a spanish speaking country. you either get a laugh or you get looked at like you're a weirdo.

I couldn't get over making the "holding out your palm like a pad and squiggling your finger like a pencil" gesture to get the bill. Seemed like the rudest thing to me, but happily expected by the staff.

what's the sign in America?

I usually hold an imaginary pen in the air and sign an invisible chit, but I assume that's pretty much the same thing

we do the same thing in the US, i dont know what PP is talking about

I usually do it without the pad - just scribble in the air with one hand.

Clapping twice briskly while holding your chin up is also the norm here.

i just wipe my arm over the table and let all the plates and glasses clatter to the floor and scream "FINISHED!"

i poop out the food i just ate and then hand it to the waiter and say "were even"

i just always drop a $100 bill on the table when i'm done and yell "keep the change" on my way out

i walk out without paying and when they chase me down the street i say "i own this restaurant" and then i say "youre fired"

I tweet the restaurant requesting a bill and if it doesn't come within 90 seconds I leave and start a hashtag campaign.

i accidentally rub my hair in the flame of the candle on the table, shove my hand into the spaghetti sauce, start writing FUCK in huge letters on the wall with my right palm, and sprint out the store, where one of my friends is waiting for me with a fire extinguisher

i'm bored. at my job. which i have. in a climate-controlled office. where i get paid a reasonable amount for my time.

xp i have a friend waiting for me with a fire extinguisher so i'll say this

being bored of available food is like the quintessential first world problem

another food-related one: being annoyed that daphne's (fast-food greek chain in socal) started putting thousand island on their gyro "street pitas," and that i was so mildly inconvenienced by having to scrape it off with a knife. food made with fresh ingredients, including green vegetables, in a restaurant that adheres to strict health and sanitation codes. it was a hellish experience!!!!!

but that is an abomination

i agree. sigh. this place changed its menu recently to become more "californian," because of financial difficulties. apparently that means thousand island (which i always ask restos to leave off; it's not my thing).

I've always thought that making the exaggerated "writing your own ticket" gesture to a server was pretty stuck up.

Another thing I noticed in some other countries is if you're crossing the street and a car slows down to let you cross, you can do this Marie Antoinette, palm-up, come hither motion to "thank" the driver for yielding. Like what a nod of the head would do in the US.

http://www.gizmag.com/coolware-personal-cooling-system/18431/

don't y'all live in first-world countries?

i was surprised to see that this thread had 36 new answers but it turns out it was just a classic ilx mixture of 'politics of messenger bags'-style narcissism of small differences back & forth and escalation of horrible jokes

opening "rolling FIRST WORLD PROBLEMS thread" on ilx with 36 new answers and finding them to be just a classic ilx mixture of 'politics of messenger bags'-style narcissism of small differences back & forth and escalation of horrible jokes ;_;

every day I fill my water bottle (nalgene) at work with too much water from the water cooler and I have to dump some at the end of the day because I don't want my nalgene o get that halitosis smell and I feel bad about wasting potable water

According to a person who wrote a book about first world water who I heard interviewed on NPR, you should dump the extra water on a plant or something.

or post it to the sahara region

when I want to post an update on Facebook, I have to click on a button, but when I want to leave a comment I just hit Return - what's that all about?

http://whitewhine.com/

Haha - that's actually funny!

i'm bored. at my job. which i have. in a climate-controlled office. where i get paid a reasonable amount for my time.

― pan loco y salsa loca (get bent), Tuesday, 19 April 2011 02:24 (2 days ago)

otmfm

enjoying http://whitewhine.com thanks michael WHITE

agonizing over what to put as the subject of an email

spent my last $5 cash on a protein shake when leaving the gym yesterday, then remembered it was the last day before payday and the last two weeks have drained my bank account and i didn't have anything to eat for dinner at home.

when i got home i grabbed this coffee can i keep spare change in which i'm sure had about $30 or $40 in it.

i spent the next hour driving to three different grocery stores that had coin-counting machines only to find that the first two were out of order and the 3rd didn't have one anymore.

frustrated and hungry, i checked my bank balance on my smart phone and realized that i actually had a few dollars in my checking account so i bought a box of macaroni and cheese, went home, ate it, then watched the "deserts" episode of Human Planet, which featured a segment on Tubu women who ride camels and walk through the Sahara for three days just to get to a well.

:-\

You can actually pay for things with change, you know. As if it were money.

you don't have direct deposit?

i have direct deposit but today is my pay day and this story took place last nite

Our change barrel is now so full that we can't get any more change in it. Fuck change.

so if you'd used your bank card, the transaction wouldn't have hit/cleared until today, when you got paid, so you wouldn't have been overdrawn, right?

sarahel maybe re-read my post

or just click on another thread

i read your post twice! your "first world problem" isn't even a "problem"!

"enduring needless nitpicking from sarahel" qualifies as a first world problem tho right?

no, it just qualifies you as a douchebag.

sarahel i was under the impression that i would overdraw my bank account but i was mistaken.

my first world problem is that i didn't want to buy dinner with a bunch of dimes and nickles, so i figured i'd take advantage of these very first-world change-counting machines at one of my nearby grocery stores but they were all broken/non-existant

also i spent $5 on a beverage that has more protein in it than lots of humans on earth get in a whole week

but gr8080....

why

why what

i was sarcastically being a sarahel stand-in asking you to explain all your actions

it's friday!

i just don't understand why you'd even need to worry about your bank balance when it's the night before you get your paycheck direct deposited into your bank account.

http://www.debateitout.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/09/jurors.jpg

my bank doesnt work that way?

if my available balance is $1.00 on thursday night, i cant buy something for $2.00 on thursday night?

your First World Problem is that you need a less crappy bank!

sigh

sarahel as someone who has also recently accepted the stereotypes ilx has laid upon him and decided to just "go with it", i salute you.

Banks now require you to opt in if you want overdraft protection. If you do not opt in to that ridiculously expensive service, your debit card transaction will be declined if you do not have sufficient funds.

For the legislation that brought about this change and other consumer protections, I am very grateful.

Jesse otm x2

"OVERDRAFT FEES AGGGHH" such a 1st world prob.

2010 was a bad year for me w/ that shit and this is the first time ive come this close in 2011

still, glad my "crappy bank" doesnt let me spend money i dont have so i end up paying $40 for a box of mac n cheese

I've saved up a crystal lite plastic can full of change for maybe a year.

Cashed it in today: $21.

another first world problem that factored into my night: anxiety over getting my bank card declined at a grocery store check out :-X

Some asshole stole my debit card while I was in New Orleans last winter and somehow they obtained my PIN. They deposited a stolen check and then withdrew a few hundred dollars, bought gasoline, and some other stuff. Chase refused to deem it a fraud because they had my PIN. I guess that's a FW problem? Whatever, I want my $300!

xxp - yes! I hated it when I overdrew my account b/c of this "service" that offered me "protection from the hassles of declined transactions" (as Chase's marketing materials put it) at the cost of $35 per instance of "protection."

sarahel as someone who has also recently accepted the stereotypes ilx has laid upon him and decided to just "go with it", i salute you.

― gr8080, Friday, April 22, 2011 5:42 PM (6 minutes ago)

lol @ reenacting the crucifixion for the holidays

Hells Cargo does you the "favor" of having the largest transactions covered first, which often results in them charging you more overdraft fees.

^^yes this is standard practice, again its so that your "most important transactions have priority"

lol @ reenacting the crucifixion for the holidays

― the wages of sin is about tree fiddy (WmC), Friday, April 22, 2011 12:51 PM (2 minutes ago) Bookmark

...and also with you

though they will often reverse the fees if you call and complain.

And now I'm going to tell you about Bank of America! Their "service" was that they deducted transactions from your account starting with the highest amount, down to the lowest. This """""SERVICE"""""" was so that "transactions of a higher dollar amount are more likely to be important transactions, such as car payments or mortgage payments [and also because if we deducted that $2.00 transaction before the one for $20.00 on the same day, we could only charge you for ONE $35.00 overdraft fee!]"

xp - fuck it, I wrote it, I'm posting it.

That legislation I spoke of took care of that fucking malarky, too.

Oh - One time the "bigger transaction first" BS led to my having 4 overdrafts, costing $35 each. Then?? You know what?! $6 per day, per overdraft for every day the account stayed in the red (maximum of 7 days' worth of charges).

congress working for you!

xpost

The Playstation Network is down for two days.

o bank of america sux

i keep my change in two 18-year-old souvenir durham bulls cups -- quarters in one, the rest in the other

I once walked to my BOA to deposit a check and they told my it would cost $9 to deposit it with a teller, so I had to go stand in the line for the drive-thru ATM, between cars. Kinda lol, kinda MAD.

So many of the bars in my work neighborhood were busy, I had to walk for approx. an hour before finding a spot to have a drink while my wife watches a kiddie movie with her college friend. Now I only have 15 minutes to relax before she calls me for dinner and the spot I want to go to is about 7 blocks away and I'm tired.

^^^ first world whining

I'm sure it's been said on this thread before, but some of these problems say more about how stress works than about how spoiled the posters are. Whiney's op is a true first world problem. Dan and Grady's just seem like stressful moments.

otm but the joke is that none of them are really problems, just like a lady having to ride a camel 3 days for water like her tribe has for 600 years isn't really a problem but is probably stressful.

when i think "first world problems" the first thing i always think about is my brother's college apartment. it had a 14" television w/ the little RCA/AV jacks on the front for plugging in a Nintendo or a DVD player. You'd walk in and see a small skillet hanging from the RCA jacks by a shoelace. When you'd ask them what was up with that they'd explain that the RCA inputs on the TV were kind of fucked up and only really worked if you applied some pressure to them in the downward direction, so to have uninterrupted dvd/nintendo they hung a weight that apparently did the trick.

I had an old TV in my college house that needed to be hit really hard every once in a while to work so we kept an old shoe tied to a belt on the coffee table so you could swing and hit it without having to get up. We also chained the remote to the coffee table after the most stonerish of the roommates took it to class with him for a week after mistaking it for his scientific calculator.

I once walked to my BOA to deposit a check and they told my it would cost $9 to deposit it with a teller, so I had to go stand in the line for the drive-thru ATM, between cars. Kinda lol, kinda MAD.

― wewetyourpants.com (rip van wanko), Friday, April 22, 2011 8:11 PM (59 minutes ago) Bookmark

actually if there's anything for which i'd praise bank of america it's depositing via ATM -- you don't have to worry about making it to the bank & the money clears immediately

shoe on a belt is genius

Depositing checks through my phone is awesome.

when i think "first world problems" the first thing i always think about is my brother's college apartment. it had a 14" television w/ the little RCA/AV jacks on the front for plugging in a Nintendo or a DVD player. You'd walk in and see a small skillet hanging from the RCA jacks by a shoelace. When you'd ask them what was up with that they'd explain that the RCA inputs on the TV were kind of fucked up and only really worked if you applied some pressure to them in the downward direction, so to have uninterrupted dvd/nintendo they hung a weight that apparently did the trick.

Also see thereifixedit.com

I had an old TV in my college house that needed to be hit really hard every once in a while to work so we kept an old shoe tied to a belt on the coffee table so you could swing and hit it without having to get up. We also chained the remote to the coffee table after the most stonerish of the roommates took it to class with him for a week after mistaking it for his scientific calculator.

― joygoat, Friday, April 22, 2011 9:06 PM (Yesterday)

this post rules

new yorkers piling up unread; new yorker magazine alert thread taunts me

Increasingly don't find NYer worth cover-to-cover reading, fwiw. Let yourself just read the articles that grab you. #firstworldsolutions

always read the comics

the cartoons

I read the poems always like at least one of them

lol @ the bank of america posts. i work at b of a (*at*, not *for* -- it's a long-term contract gig through an agency) and even i don't have an account with them. my accounts are with hsbc for checking and a credit union for savings. thinking of moving my checking into the credit union too.

• getting Japan relief fund raiser event fatigue u_u

• just spent a week's pay on getting the brakes on my car fixed

i feel like the shift pattern i do at my very easy office job means working hours that are too long, 10 hour shifts sometimes, but i'm unsure if it's worth the almost £200 less a month i would get if i switched to dayshift with flexi time doing 36 hours per week.

i have to walk ten minutes to the nearest grocery shop that has a decent range/pricing and frequently when i'm doing so it rains.

it is not my turn in any of my facebook scrabble games

^^^

when I turn on my AC it's a little too cold but when I leave it off it's a little too hot

having to remove these fucking stickers from my fruits and vegetables

but **YOU DON'T HAVE TO**

Do you eat the stickers on your apples, pears, other non-peely fruit?

i keep forgetting what happened in the previous episode of a tv series by the time i get around to watching the next one

they are digging up my street using a pneumatic drill plus some truck that pummels apart the pavement at 7:30am on a Saturday WTF??!

Dude they've been doing that all week; for fucks sake, how did you manage to sleep through it until now?

dunno, guess my earwax must've become unimpacted during last night's brief slumber

forgetting to attach an attachment to a work email :(

FYI This is the view from dell's living room window @ 9AM last Tuesday (I think)

http://i934.photobucket.com/albums/ad184/sdolnack/3eb032ef.jpg

forgetting to attach an attachment to a work email :(

did this w/ a long detailed e-mail sent to ~300 people once. :''(

my PC at home has malware and I can't use Google or Bing bc their search results auto-redirect me to freaky diseased sites

I mean I guess that could happen in the third world too but there's something pretty... entitled about getting butthurt over the crappiness of ask.com

http://i.imgur.com/nCGTA.png

didn't have the patience to steal a pdf of a modern translation of lucretius from a rapidshare-style filedump, had to make do with a free old-timey translation from the internet classics archive

;-)

"first world problems" is kind of a way to get yr nag on w/some "you know there are HUNGRY PEOPLE IN THIS WORLD" & get a pass doing it to people other than yr kids y/n - why should you have to wait til you've got a teenager to cop this look amirite

have to put sheets on my bed, would pretty much rather kill myself

"first world problems" is kind of a way to get yr nag on w/some "you know there are HUNGRY PEOPLE IN THIS WORLD" & get a pass doing it to people other than yr kids y/n - why should you have to wait til you've got a teenager to cop this look amirite

― pathos of the unwarranted encore (underrated aerosmith bootlegs I have owned), Sunday, July 17, 2011 5:59 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

spoken like someone who didn't have to grow up with the entitlement generation around them 24-7 http://i.imgur.com/zi7hd.gif

have to put sheets on my bed, would pretty much rather kill myself

― J0rdan S.

looooool i have to do this too if i don't want to sleep on a mattress cover tonight

- have to get up sometime in next ten mins to go do an easy job that covers my bills fml

power's out, battery backup for my wireless internet might not last long enough for me to keep farting around on the internet all night

when is the iphone going to introduce a "compilation" button like the ipod has, ffs

Whiney: click "more" in the lower right and it's there. If you want it as a button on the lower bar, click "edit" and you can drag buttons on/off the bar at the bottom.

hipster puppies 2: furs twirled problems

bite privilege

had to spend money on a car repair that I had set aside for a European vacation

you can't drive you Europe from there!

uh, to, wtf??

• a typo messed up my internet message board quip DAMMIT!

Whiney: click "more" in the lower right and it's there. If you want it as a button on the lower bar, click "edit" and you can drag buttons on/off the bar at the bottom.

― mh, Saturday, July 23, 2011 12:21 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

Nah, I mean when you sort by artists, anything in a comp shows up. it doesnt do that on a pod. drives me nuts

Oh, yeah, that is lame as hell and annoys me.

That fucks me off too. It happens on the Apple TV and there's no easy way to get to the end of the artist list. Ridiculous.

imo Apple TV kind of sucks browsing music unless you do it from an iPhone/iPad

and then it's awesome

lol kerm

Stood on what might have been a piece of glass earlier and ripped the sole of my foot open, now I'm worried I won't be able to go clubbing this week or enjoy my Europe holiday next week because it hurts so fucking much to stand on

broken glass everywhere, problems in the first world you know they just don't care

so sad that they don't have glass yet in the third world

Three stitches and told to let it rest so it heals quickly, might as well just end it now.

wanna check out the new SmashBurger that opened up, but construction on the route there makes it prohibitive to do so for lunch.

itunes/gracenote gives me this -- http://ecx.images-amazon.com/images/I/619h9L2eHcL._SS135_SL160_.jpg -- for the velvet underground's first and third albums

what came first, this thread or the reddit tag?

http://knowyourmeme.com/memes/first-world-problems

-found out that FIRST WORLD PROBLEMS was not an original ILX meme, felt deflated

meta

- have to sit in someone else's cubicle the first few hours of the day -- can't read my computer screen with the sun coming in through the skylight

Ate a hot dog and got mustard on my track ball. Track ball became hard to move around with my thumb.

BUT THEN, I swirled it around and all the dust that was caught inside it got stuck on the mustard and rotated around to the front where I was able to pick it off.

Track ball moves freely once again though the surface is still sticky.

Ate a hot dog and got mustard on my track ball.

http://www.astabgay.com/KingsOfCamp/KOCimages/John_Inman.png

Don't repost on g+. That's annoying because then I have to see them twice.

― Jeff, Tuesday, August 2, 2011 10:50 AM (2 minutes ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

Or more.

― Jeff, Tuesday, August 2, 2011 10:50 AM (1 minute ago) Bookmark

sorry jeff

Spotty wifi in the bathroom at work.

A+

ultimate

does pandora.com take 13 seconds to load so that i can't use f5 to cirsumvrent the skip track counter?

(without waiting 13 seconds every time)

I still wonder if I should buy [a house] to rent out. My pension is gonna be crazy low so I need something else. :-(

― Nathalie (stevienixed), Monday, August 8, 2011 9:09 AM (15 minutes ago)

@1000TimesYes

Drove my rental car 25 minutes out and then drove back and returned it because the stereo wasn't loud enough. #musiciseverything

okay, that's just being an asshole, unless the stereo was actually broken

groan

idk i sympathize

if i was the person that had to exchange whiney's hyundai sonata because he complained about the stereo not being loud enough i would make sure that i farted in his new car & then let it run w/ the heat on full blast for a few mins

lol @ whiney

someone should tell him there's a volume button

a good stereo is kind of the most important thing to me too. obv its a 1st world prob but w/e

a good stereo will be u&k when i buy a new car in a month or two but it's a fuckin rental that's probably going to get destroyed by juggalos.

for a rental car?? and to waste an hour+ of your own time? talk about the ultimate

http://www.big-t-shirts.com/ProdImages/big/792.jpg

estimate the percent chance that whiney was very actively thinking about the twitter possibilities while he was making this decision

is there a number bigger than 100

if i was going on a hella long road trip a good stereo would be the primary concern

i mean if he didnt check that out the first time he got in the car thats on him but i fuxx with good sound

iirc most of u little dudes listen to music on laptop speakers so

i blast tunes in my car every day, dogg

actually, i will be renting a car in like two weeks for work! i will not be concerned with the stereo, because it's a rental!

"Hi I'm a music reviewer and it is my livelihood and it is essential I have a LOUD car stereo so that I may do my job"

btw in no way do I believe he actually did this, it just sounds like something someone would say on twitter to be clever

i really can't imagine that whatever car he got in return had a noticeable louder stereo than whatever car he had in the first place, they are all rental cars

like when I joke about making an anechoic chamber in my basement for fun

I'm just bitter because my car only has one working speaker and no working volume control, soI can't hear anything if I'm driving faster than 40mph.

if i was less terrified of customer service interactions i would ask the rental agent in cincinnati for the car with the sickest audio system and report back to you guys.

sorry I only follow car dealership updates via twitter

btw there's no way whiney's drive was more than 3.5 hours, so it's not "a super long road trip"

in fact he spent 1/3 of that amount of time driving from and to the rental car place + waiting for a new car

I mean he's only driving from one side of brooklyn to the other, right?

they should give him a stereo that only sounds good playing witch house

hahaha

Whine like the cars, the cars that go boom

I had a FIRST WORLD PROBLEM to add to this but I really can't compete

• I had more than doubled my previous high score playing Tetris on my phone today, but i got a call and when i hung up i hit the End button twice by accident and that killed the game without saving the score... :( I was in the Zone.

i really hope whiney didn't actually do that

would you bet against it?

my money would be on the "just wanted a good tweet" scenario, but i dunno

nah, he did it

okay, that's just being an asshole, unless the stereo was actually broken

You know that's going to be the reason, not that the factory settings were too low.

maybe rental car stereos have lower output so people don't blow the speakers

Only saying that there will be justification for this, you wait.

I've had some rental cars that do this annoying thing where the stereo gets loud when you step on the gas, but then gets really quiet when you slow down or stop. It's actually some kind of setting that you can change if you find out how to work the menu on the stereo.

I've noticed that before too, that the stereo would go down as I turned a corner. Took me awhile to figure out it wasn't me.

There are some damn stupid features cars get sold with these days.

haha yeah my car has speed-sensitive volume, i've never tried it tho sounds kinda dumb

Not everything in this world needs to be goddammed automated.

I forgot about that! My car has it too, kind of nice but I am twitchy so I turned it off.

I mean, talk about your FIRST WORLD PROBLEM and all, but who the hell raised so much of a fuss about not being able to hear their radio when the engine revved too hot.

oh i dunno. i for one am sick of having to turn down the volume manually every time i turn a corner.

xpost

Can I get a home stereo system that automatically lowers its volume when the needle first hits the record or gets to the label? That scuffing sound is going to ruin my speakers.

my ex's car had that and it was real annoying at first until i discovered that the stereo's RPM-sensitive volume feature actually had three or four ~different levels of sensitivity~

once i got it dialed in to the level that worked for me it was awesome

i blew out my speakers years ago when i maxed the volume when Hollaback Girl came on the radio

songs where it's fun to spell c-a-n-k-l-e-s 2 the beat

once i got it dialed in to the level that worked for me it was awesome

You shouldn't have to do this. It's like Microsoft engineers have taken over the auto industry.

no, it was like driving w/o having to adjust the volume knob ever

How loud are these engines? Of all the things that interferes with whether or not I can hear something, the RPMs are down on the list.

It would even be more distracting for me since if I'm slowing down, I'm probably looking for a street number and i don't need the volume popping back up.

well presumably, the faster your engine is going, it usually means the car is also going faster-- more friction from the road/wind etc.

It would even be more distracting for me since if I'm slowing down, I'm probably looking for a street number and i don't need the volume popping back up.

this is when the volume would be rolling back down, pp.

luckily, my truck makes so much racket that the only setting that makes sense is MAX VOLUME at ALL TIMES

See, I'm already getting confused. Just leave it set at 12 and I'll manage on my own.

FYI, J0rd, the display literally said "VOLUME LIMITED" when u tried to turn it up.

I had about 4.5 hours driving today. I lost maybe 45 minutes of my day. Totally worth it.

What, was i going to be alone with my thoughts?! Literally the only thing I like about driving is blasting rap records.

im with whiney on this one guys sorry

I even played kreayshawn for u j0rd u_u

What, was i going to be alone with my thoughts?!

I think he's found an argument we're not gonna beat

http://i.imgur.com/GT9M1.gif

i blew out my speakers years ago when i maxed the volume when Hollaback Girl came on the radio

― https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_i_qxQztHRI (Princess TamTam), Thursday, August 11, 2011 6:01 PM (5 hours ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

uhmazing

Has anyone referred that tweet to white whine yet?

Last time I submitted something to whitewhine, the person whose fb profile it was threatened to sue me and the site for 'breach of copyright' and actually got the post taken down. Amazing.

^^^ first world problem

Yeah I felt like I was trapped in a recursive first world problem with no escape. Probably got over it by eating some cheesecake or something.

how did they know it was you

Ha well I did then post a link back to whitewhine on their fb profile. I thought he'd take it 'the right way'.

The offending image, for posterity
https://lh5.googleusercontent.com/-qVVw_VJrOZw/TcaV53JrKiI/AAAAAAAAABE/9_ViUfrAo-c/s500/whitewhine.JPG

(he pays for his cleaner from his trust fund)

what a cad

i feel like i have seen that before? did you post it here or did i actually see it on white whine?

Must have been on white whine. It was on a couple months back. The guy threw a hissy fit in the comments, then the whole thing vanished.

whizer soze

What a dickweed. I've never had a maid, but of my friends who did when I was growing up, I remember that they had to have the place somewhat tidy for her to do her job. I think Tom might misunderstand.

i just wipe my arm over the table and let all the plates and glasses clatter to the floor and scream "FINISHED!"

― i put that on my sub (Whiney G. Weingarten), Monday, April 18, 2011 10:00 PM

i poop out the food i just ate and then hand it to the waiter and say "were even"

― ban drake (the rapper) (max), Monday, April 18, 2011 10:02 PM

XD

- all of kelly clarkson's albums are on spotify, except for my december

hey that IS bullshit

What a dickweed. I've never had a maid, but of my friends who did when I was growing up, I remember that they had to have the place somewhat tidy for her to do her job. I think Tom might misunderstand.

Actually, there are some maid agencies that will do hoarder/extreme messiness cleanup work. The agency I worked for had to call in some of them for new dementia clients.

re the new malkmus record

there was an ad for the this in spotify telling me to listen to it so i clicked on it and it wasn't available for me to play

― markers, Friday, August 19, 2011 1:10 AM

ordering glasses online so i went to my optometrist to get my prescription, but i didn't have him measure the distance b/w my pupils, so i have to do that manually, or i have to go back

protip: i just walked into a lens crafters (no appt, already had my script from a diff doctor) and they did it for me. no cost, no hassle. then i ordered online :)

protip: don't do this These Eye(glasse)s

Thread to Lists Artists Who You Hate Because of Spotify ads

my TV broke, so now i have no way of accessing my DVR to prevent it from recording Glee tonight

A friend of mine was recently laid off from a medicinal marijuana farm and paid a severance of $5000 in weed.

but what was the street value?

i bet people get paid in drugs more often in the third world tbh

I can't remember, are the stores higher than street value or vice versa?

my TV broke, so now i have no way of accessing my DVR to prevent it from recording Glee tonight

Can't you do this online somehow?

i don't think i have the special kind that you can control from your phone or w/e. anyway an update to my story: my uncle fixed the TV and my sister said "oh let's just watch Glee, it's already recorded." :(

xpost The street value was so shitty - which is why she was laid off - that I believe she and her friends just eventually smoked it all. From my understanding, marijuana is practically valueless on the west coast.

Charity muggers can take the enjoyment out of giving

otm, those people are vile

- forgot to do my fantasy team again ffs
- have to cram in arsenal vs chelsea AND a steak lunch before making it to a comedy gig in galway at five

Internet has been up and down all weekend, mostly down today, but it's because the cable co is rolling out a big speed increase, from 10MB downstream to 25MB.

• have had Maroon 5's "Moves Like Jagger" stuck in my head for three days

e-40 is releasing three new albums on the same day, i'm going to have to make a lot of choices about what else to delete from my ipod to fit them all on it at once

Visiting with friends in South West England last weekend, and the sustained dry weather there means that a hosepipe ban in gardens is imminent. My chum Carl professed concern that he might not get time to jetwash the patio before this was enforced.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FZ12Ry-hD6I

http://i.imgur.com/uos5I.png

The "atrium" of Lincoln Center is another building entirely! What is that shit?!

― camp lo magellan (Whiney G. Weingarten), Saturday, July 28, 2012 12:12 PM (1 minute ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

lol yep

:D

I woulda gone with the mozart line but what do I know

i wish my iphone 3GS would fucking break already so I can get one of the newer ones with 64GB of storage

https://twitter.com/ebertchicago/status/244982314579410944

ha

Putting together some music for my wedding reception and having to come to terms with saving some time by using some old 192kpbs rips instead of re-repping my CDs at 320.

Ebert should've known that Brainless Hulu would have some design flaws

This is the point in list making that I hate, where suddenly impossible choices have to made. Deciding to leave Ariel Pink out of my top ten was hard enough, now I'm figuring out whether lightning bolt, Oneida, Dial, or Meek Mill gets the shaft on my albums list

― Raymond Cummings, Tuesday, December 4, 2012 5:55 PM (1 hour ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-4nW4jGmCgO8/T1FHOY2BbiI/AAAAAAAAABc/Arx9Gcfyp7c/s1600/images.jpg

you heard that same voice in your head whiney, don't front

given a choice of ads; clicked on the mcdonalds ad b/c i wanted to look at hamburgers; ad was for healthy smoothies

gross

clicked on a link, thought it was an article, it was really a podcast

One month, a group of annoying moms from a mom group sent a shitload of group texts in the first week of the month

― i don't even have an internet (Hurting 2), Saturday, July 6, 2013 9:20 PM

wake up wake up wake up wake up

^^^ fwp winner

friend's FB post, precisely five minutes ago

Does anyone know of someone who does flower drying and pressing in Sheffield? It's a single rose that needs to be done urgently. Can you let me know asap please. THANKS

that rose will start a scrapbook that will win the heart of your friend's paramour

My band's minister of information has caused media uproar with his bizarre anti-semitic conspiracy theories. #securityofthefirstworldproblems

SUPER-frustrated that I've been asked to provide my address history for THE LAST 6 YEARS. It's taken me more than an hour to gather the 7+ addresses for this, and the times I lived there.

I think tasks like this create extra work for people who choose to be mobile for their personal and professional development. People who move around a lot often do so to fulfill their ambitions, pursue opportunities, and learn more about other parts of the world. Shouldn't society design data capture processes that encourage all these things, rather than "punish" the people who have these attributes?

oh dear lord

People who move around a lot often do so to fulfill their ambitions, pursue opportunities, and learn more about other parts of the world.

http://i.imgur.com/ry2eJ.gif

it was really a podcast

hahhahaa at first i thought that was kind of reasonable until i got to "Shouldn't society design data capture processes that encourage all these things, rather than "punish" the people who have these attributes?"

shouldnt society monitor us even more closely, rather than make people who move around a lot occasionally spend 5 minutes filling out a form??

my biggest takeaway from getting a job right out of college that required a top secret government clearance was "keep track of where you've lived"

Pennsylvania Act 33 Child Abuse clearance asks for previous addresses since 1975 AND everyone who has lived with you since 1975.
O_o

i'm sick of the damn IRS punishing me for making money

viewing it as a 'punishment' is what got me... like yes, they designed this form specifically to discourage people from leaving their apartments. all for the sake of saving 45 minutes in filling out a form

"Shouldn't society design data capture processes that encourage all these things, rather than "punish" the people who have these attributes?"

everytime I am faced w/ this challenge I end up using my gmail history

i am strongly in favor of society punishing smug assholes

^^^

i used to have to fill in Criminal Records Bureau forms on the regular because i work with children/vulnerable adults and i felt pretty smug when i'd lived 10 years in the same place and filling the form in got easier

on the other hand i'd rather they didn't let bad people work with vulnerable people so it doesn't seem a big hardship tbh

Y'know, it's not worth complaining about, and nothing actually needs to be changed, and basically fuck this guy because his tone is horrendous, but it is a huge pain in the ass. I've lived in 20+ places since moving out of my mom's house!

yeah, that's the thing, tons of stuff is a pain in the ass.

the whole first world is one giant pain in the ass m/l

streaming tv site updates adblocker detection, won't show you tv until you let them show you the ads too

pee related

Remember when people used this moronic phrase

"My home has been virtually destroyed by flooding"

"First world problems, bro!"

i need to see a Spike Lee Ted Talk to research a piece i'm writing and its nowhere on the internet

― Whiney G. Weingarten, Tuesday, April 22, 2014 12:18 PM (8 hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

hahaha

oh FUCK I've been offered a free trip to a Caribbean private island and I'm going to have to miss the second week including the women's final ;_;

― lex pretend, Friday, 23 May 2014 18:06 (Yesterday)

can't wait for lex to lecture ilx more about privilege

thought abt this thread today when i got upset about some shoddy reparative tailoring on an old lanvin suit

scum tbh

Now a grim reality for the lad

http://i.imgur.com/oB3vRKv.jpg

Paul McCartney got sick so now we have to wait four more months to see him

I've missed a load of games due to Glastonbury and ugh the first one I will get to watch in its entirety will be Belgium USA, which will surely be like a really shitty midtable Premiership game.

― Matt DC, Tuesday, 1 July 2014 12:28 (1 minute ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

;)

usb port on cheap laptop not deep enough to accept dragonfly DAC without having to jiggle the connection periodically

my new sofa is too big for my house

restaurants pricing sturgeon as if it were beluga, gtfo

Want desperately to go to sleep as soon as possible this evening, but must attend condo association meeting tonight.

human suffering is a strange thing -- I have experienced "problems" over the last several months that, by most people's standards, would deserve me a kick in the head for even suggesting they were problems, which I feel embarrassed even to repeat here. Yet I have spent months feeling irritable, anxious, and scared the majority of the time, feeling like I was in a vise that wouldn't let up it's grip, feeling like I was going to lose everything. I am reminded of the saying from the Sopranos. "- "Sometimes I go about in pity for myself, and all the while, a great wind carries me across the sky." And that great wind is upper middle class white privilege I guess.

i wish my colleagues didn't assume i had imessage on my computer and send me super long detailed texts with charts and files that no fucking way am I gonna deal with on my iPhone 6S

i wonder if unless thinking about all the blessings in yr life gives you comfort (like to meditate on all the wonderful things you have to dispel yr anxiety) it could be that your awareness of the relative frivolity of yr problems contributes to yr suffering since you don't give yourself permission to experience it - instead you experience the suffering alongside yr disdain for yr own suffering xp

i meditate on the comfort of my iPhone 6S on the reg tbh

I mean, to be clear these problems involved several *major life decisions* of the type expected to cause stress, it's just that they were major life decisions that I am so lucky even to be able to make right now that yes, I did kind of hate myself for suffering anxiety over them.

but even if the problems are truly trivial, the existence in which you are processing them is changing in unanticipated and unpredictable ways right now... it's kinda like trying to take a sip of a bloody mary while the plane flies through a a patch of turbulence

that's an excellent metaphor and captures how it feels

Somewhat relatedly, this is strangely affecting although slightly overdramatic and FWP (forgiveable offenses for an extremely talented high school student):

https://www.huffingtonpost.ca/entry/ontario-teen-numb-short-film-liv-mcneil_ca_5eecd230c5b6d71ac27ff017

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iSkbd6hRkXo

And, appropriately, the 15-yr-old director's commentary:

This is just a generalization of the feeling of isolation, not my personal feelings, I for sure haven't been enjoying quarantine, but some have it worse. We have all been going through stuff right now, especially with Black Lives Matter, my struggles are in no way comparable to some things people are going though right now. this is my own experience, some are a whole lot worse than mine. I'm just showing what I know.

This is a mini film, Numb by me. I did this for a school project but I'm really happy with how it came out, so I'm posting it here. This took me a combined 3 weeks or so. hope you enjoy! please feel free to share as much as you like, just please credit me and M83, the band who made the music.

company pass dangling from lanyard clacks annoyingly off my belt buckle when walking down the corridor of my office

Wait, how low do you wear your lanyard?

Back in the late 80s when I first joined corporate life, I remember hearing lanyards and passes would soon be obsolete now that retinal scanning was possible. The future has failed to arrive!

Wait, how low do you wear your lanyard?

how high do you wear your trousers more like

this lanyard is not adjustable, it hangs where it hangs

my belt is around my waist you maniacs

Tying a loop in the lanyard itself is knot a knoption?

(X post)

I’m concerned where this forces security guards to look to check your credentials.

Just get a shorter lanyard cord, if you want a rainbow one like mine I can give you one

ahah great problem.
yeah the solution seems obvious : tie it up !

or get your neck more swole

this lanyard is not adjustable, it hangs where it hangs

my belt is around my waist you maniacs

They're always annoying long. I always had to tuck them inside my shirt while working with clients.

Most injuries related to cutting avocados occur from April through July. Here’s how to reduce your risk.

https://www.washingtonpost.com/wellness/2024/06/26/avocado-hand-injuries-knife/

Good thing avocado injury season is ending soon!! It's gonna be Taco Tuesday every day when August rolls around.

Moths in the snoring room

Couple win refund after buying £32m moth-infested London mansion

Iya Patarkatsishvili and Dr Yevhen Hunyak sued property developer over infestation that ruined wine and clothes

The daughter of a Georgian billionaire and her husband have been granted a refund after buying a £32m London mansion that was infested with moths.

Iya Patarkatsishvili and Dr Yevhen Hunyak bought the early Victorian seven-bedroom Notting Hill home in May 2019. It boasted a pool, spa, gym, wine room, library, cinema, and a “snoring room” designed for peaceful sleep.

enough of your first-world problems, i want solutions

https://www.yankodesign.com/2025/04/28/this-adorable-cat-shaped-fan-blows-on-your-hot-drinks-so-you-dont-have-to/

https://www.newyorker.com/culture/the-weekend-essay/my-brain-finally-broke

Started reading that and going 'oh its only your brain that broke..'

Probably unfair but there you are.

The writing style of the first paragraph didn't exactly break my brain, but it broke my will to pay The New Yorker one cent in order to it read any further.

Started reading that and going 'oh its only your brain that broke..'

Yeah, that was several thousand words of "sounds like a you problem..."

is adult-onset dyslexia a thing?

She mentions offhand that she got Covid three times. That shit fucks your brain up.

Xp I would guess it’s related to middle aged vision deterioration… I bought my first pair of reading glasses ever last week. The frames are cute and blue so I will still maintain an aesthetic if I have to wear them on a zoom.

that would've been my next guess. but then i only saw the non-paywalled part of the article and it wasn't much to go on.

having told me i could only see two sentences it then offered me 20 other stories that it would only let me see 2 sentences of, most of which seemed to be about ai. that's a hard no.

Goddamn youtube forcing me sit through TWELVE FULL SECONDS of ads before I can watch a vintage video of Can in performance

My goodness, that is fully avoidable still with Firefox + uBlock. Never use the YouTube app on mobile. Gotta jump through more hoops on iPhone, but still possible to avoid at least watching them.

Xp this was me last night… except it was pet bloopers in newscasts, and they didn’t even have the full version of the “omg … that cat” clip

Yeah the YouTube app is awful, ads all over the place, but the website version is oddly still not yet fully enshittified.

At this point, I just cast YouTube from my browser to my Apple TV whenever I watch a video. It avoids ads and saves me from taking forever trying to type a search term with the remote.

that is fully avoidable still with Firefox + uBlock

This. I've literally never seen an ad on youtube when watching on my pc.