poster name ettiquette

How do you guys know when a poster changes names?

It really depends on the people involved; some people like being called by their real names and some don't.

I'll be honest, every few months I'll drop my first name out there in the hopes that someone will start using it in familiarity.

how's that going, mr. ville?

My stance falls between "it really depends" and "less confusing not to".

It really depends on the people involved; some people like being called by their real names and some don't.

yeah. also, feel weird calling posters by names i've figured out from lurking, Dan

xxp It's sorta depressing. : )

depends on the posters really. first names seem ok if they've been used on-board in the past unless somebody expressly says no. using irl names if posters never ever use them on-board seems somewhere between cliquish and dickish tbh.

i don't want anyone to refer to me by my real name anymore. just my dn. good luck.

I can see how some might find it a little cliquish but otoh, I really can't expect DJP and jjusten, for example, to refer to each other by forum names all the time

Richard OTM

also depends on the log-in name, cos tbh addressing "somebody" as "for example" DJP feels kinda prickly and odd in itself

My names is generic enough that it's not easily searchable but I use it here in the hope that it will discourage me from saying anything I wouldn't say irl, maybe even at work.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TrPCWfB-Jdo

this is why I only ever refer to other people as 'buford'

It really depends on the people involved; some people like being called by their real names and some don't.

this.

it varies going the other way too - like i'd feel pretty odd calling j0rdan or rev or other people i interact with regularly by whatever nonsense they have as a screen name that day, so i stick with those.

i'd actually rather people call me by my actual name if they know me! yeah i know it IS my name but tbh i kinda dislike being referred to as "the lex" still after all these years - i never even wanted the definite article in the first place, and it's kind of like, i'd rather be referred to as a person rather than a screen name

Oh man, I never bother with display names (unless they're used permanently), but user names are my default even if I know someone well.

I lost my answer there due to ineptitude, but was almost identical to Noodle Vague's re. whether the poster has used it themselves and hasn't explicitly said not to since then.

Like, I know NV's first name but would never use it on here.

jaymc used my real name the other day while drunkposting and it made me feel good actually

facebook has sorta 'changed the rules' about how people use their real names on the internet, tho as far as msg boards go ilx always seemed to have an unusually high rate of people using their real name. I sorta woulda preferred going by my real first name a la max/laurel but it wasn't possible.

my user name/internet name more or less came about because i had no desire to be googleable for posterity, especially when i used to blog about personal life + work + things i wdn't necessarily want my fam to be intimately acquainted with.

first names bother me a little less and there's a pretty easy paper trail to find mine but y'know, i like noodle as a name :D

facebook has sorta 'changed the rules' about how people use their real names on the internet

yeah it's funny - when i first got on the internet the default rule was to preserve your anonymity - for your own safety! don't tell people your password or credit card number or real name - and the knowledge that no one knew who you were is how you could build up a level of trust online. now it's totally flipped - i find that i treat people with suspicion unless i know who they are (not nec their government identity, but a consistent online identity ideally vouched for by other people i know)

i think of a lot of you by your dotted quad

the answer to pretty much any question usually ends up being "it depends"

xtian name username is always classy

quiet buford

geoff iatee

I just memorise the 32 bit string.

barry dayo

the answer to pretty much any question usually ends up being "it depends"

depends on the question

the answer to pretty much any question usually ends up being "depends"

What does 90 year old pussy smell like?

omg

I'm really loathe to post in this thread, even tho there is stuff I'd kinda like to say/explain. But posts like MW just made (and yes I know you're joking) just make it an even more uncomfortable environment to do so.

(and no doubt I will probably be castigated for even expressing that I feel that discomfort - I'm sorry for saying this, but I do)

For me, I find it tricky in those cases where posters' previous usernames were their real names (e.g. stevem, ronan), but who now go under a different name. If you're used to calling someone their real name it seems weird to suddenly stop. But then they might have changed their username precisely because they don't want their real name to be used online any more. But then it seems 90% of posters still know who these people are.

I voted "DN - less confusing" bcuz I often get confused.

I never ever used to use my real name on the Internet - for safety reasons but also using a gender neutral name to avoid the more distasteful aspects. Even on ILX I initially used a pseudonym. The only reason I ever started using my IRL name was because ILX was at that point a community of a few dozen posters, most of whom I had met either in London or on tour. It's something I completely regret, and if I'd had the faintest inkling of how it would turn out, I never would have done. Once you let a genie out of a bottle you can never put it back in, even if this exposes you to difficulties, legal, social or otherwise. (as I've learned to my peril recently)

I think the default option should not to call ppl by their real name unless they have given you, personally, the go-ahead to use it. Because even if someone might be OK with ppl they know IRL, it's still weird + disorienting when someone you've never even heard of starts taking that familiarity.

But mostly I go for the less confusing option bcz I see people referencing real names in threads (like maybe they've said on 77 or a local thread?) and I've absolutely no idea who is being spoken to/of.

I think this is a very legitimate question, of course, but I have become so confused about who various posters really are, that I try to just refer to whatever forum name they're using and address the content of their post. In many cases the forum name they're using is a new name for a prior forum name they used and I never really knew their real name, anyway, or I've lost track of what it was.

I could care less.

;)

imo if you let members a community of strangers on the internet find out your real name the ball is no longer in your court

I know ENBB's name but I refer to ENBB 'cause I've never used the real name (that I recall) irl and it would sound presumptious somehow.

I don't have a problem with it, but sometimes it is confusing to me.

I am glad you chose to post on this thread, White Chocolate Cheesecake! (Do you mind if I call you WCC for short?)

I do think that for many, there is a level of comfort/familiarity where it starts feeling weird to NOT call ppl by their real names (I mean ffs this August the OG ILX cru will have been here for ELEVEN YEARS), but OTOH I do feel that, in most cases, it just makes more sense to refer to people by their screen/display names. It's less confusing in the long run.

I mean, I've known jjjusten since 1986 and I believe that since his name change I've referred to him as "jjjusten" or "jjj" approximately 90% of the time. It doesn't feel weird at all to me because that's the name he chose for here. For me, I want to call a person by the name they chose to use; I have the impression that I rarely, if ever, refer to people by their actual names unless:

- I've known them for a very long time
- They've told me they're okay with it
- They have come up in a conversation and I am using the government name to maintain consistency

If someone tells me they don't want me to use their real name, I'm not going to. It just seems dickish to do otherwise. It also seems presumptuous to default to someone's real name to me because I always assume that they've chosen their display name for a reason and it's not up to me to second-guess them.

What's weird is when you meet a poster but you still think of their forum name as their 'real' name. I still think of Ned as Ned even though I've met him several times.

jesus christ 1986

its confusing but i support the confusion

hahaha carry on i just had a moment xpost

dude, we have known each other for longer than some posters on this board have been ALIVE

chew on that for a while

I was born in 1986

you really have been the best dad a boy could hope for xpost

As long as I like the person doing it I find it sort of nice when people use my real name. If I don't like them then it can feel creepy.

http://lh3.ggpht.com/_yfzu44bMrxU/Sfvs5ermaZI/AAAAAAAABfk/10DFKbBypzg/image%5B3%5D.png

(jjj & djp, 1986)

dammit i posted the wrong one. there was a great one where the angels were pushing each other on a swing underneath some fat birds.

that's sexist

There are some people I've know since 1977.

xp 'Wild Balls for Fat Birds'

me too, if we count the inside genitalia of my birth parents. i had like a billion brothers.

I mean non-family people.

i've been called by my real name (not when shit gets heated, just by people "in the know"), but some people still call me "gear" too. i.e. to me DJP will always be "hi dere."

For me it is Lord of deXness.

I have another opinion (please explain).

ok when shit gets heated iirc

You can call me WCC, DJP. You can call me Fotherington Thomas if you like! ;)

It is just weird when you've been a (prominent-ish?) member of an online community for so long that way more ppl know / recogise who you are, than you know who they are. The imbalance is v v awkward and leads to this one-sided illusion of intimacy which can indeed be creepy. You'd think that the experience of being in a touring band, and going to strange places and having a room full of ppl know your name when you don't know them - you'd think that would prepare you. But it's more like - once you have experienced some genuine scary stuff go down, you feel less charitable about viewing stuff that might probably be quite innocent in a positive light.

x-post - I think I may have called you by your real name OL. Does it bug you?

voted option 4, but have thought better of it and wish I'd voted #3 instead

this is a very complicated subject for me -- I have so many public forum names/identities because no name I've ever gone by has really felt comfortable to me. My family calls me by a childhood nickname that hung on into adulthood, but which I sort of divested myself of before the internet got going, and before I started working as a freelancer. The first time my mother introduced me to someone as William instead of the name she's always known me as, I felt so sorry and so embarrassed on her behalf. I told my wife to go ahead and go back to referring to me as that nickname on Facebook rather than ever calling me "hubby" again.

What's weird is when you meet a poster but you still think of their forum name as their 'real' name. I still think of Ned as Ned even though I've met him several times.

It'll sink in one day.

it's all good! xxp

imo if you let members a community of strangers on the internet find out your real name the ball is no longer in your court

― flopson, Thursday, February 2, 2012 1:55 PM (22 minutes ago)

I think there is some truth here but as I said upthread I think this is more of a 'big picture internet trend' w/ fb steering the ship. most people are giving up the ball, for better or worse. there really are very few prominent ilx posters who are still 100% anonymous.

I know this is amazingly dense of me but it just occurred to me (IPO etc...) that the real genius of fb was making ppl out themselves, and in networks, to exploit in a way that early oughts' internet culture wouldn't have tolerated so much.

I could form an opinion on this question, if I were absolutely required to have one.

(... time passes...)

Using a real name for a poster whose forum name provides no clue to their real name seems like a very handy tool for creating mass confusion and panic. So, obv choice #1: totally fine.

I called DJP by his real name in another thread earlier today and now I'm paranoid that I've pissed him off.

Yeah, I think more than a lot of folks people call DJP by his irl name.

i'm almost 100% anon afaik. i might have emailed someone from my personal email at some point, and i think once a couple years ago mentioned my first name on a previous login. even so, while i would definitely be surprised if anyone used it on ilx i would consider it my own doing. it wouldn't have been hard to avoid

i mean whether it constitutes a dick move or creepy or OK depends on interpersonal dynamics (see: enbb's post,) and an obviously rule of thumb is not to use someone's full name. but if you add ilxors on fb you should anticipate it will get on the board eventually

xp -- Dephalonius Jebediah Pursonton.

This is one of the biggest reasons I will never ever use Facebook.

I remember when I first started posting here and trying to sort out all the Alexes. And don't even get me started about the guy who writes for the VIllage Voice who shares the name of a female poster here.

And there's an example: someone whose name might be known by many, but nonetheless, doesn't care to have her name shared all over the place. It's tricky, so I just go by username (even my wife whose name is not really Sunny.)

my user name/internet name more or less came about because i had no desire to be googleable for posterity, especially when i used to blog about personal life + work + things i wdn't necessarily want my fam to be intimately acquainted with.

first names bother me a little less and there's a pretty easy paper trail to find mine but y'know, i like noodle as a name :D

― dayove cool (Noodle Vague), Thursday, February 2, 2012 12:19 PM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

I know your govt name now because you were on TV. Couldn't wait to tell Nick about that while we were shopping for eyepatches.

Voted depends on the poster.

Idk if I've ever used my real name on ILX, none of youse know me IRL, and I'm used to being called all sorts of things thanks to living in the age of the intarwebs. My guildmates for e.g. still call me "Ambera" or "Ascarii", even in the pub, even having known me for 7 years. So, yeah, whatever, it's nbd.

the eyepatches gag took me 2 minutes but it was worth it

also there are a few ilxors who are facebook friends but i can't remember what their ilx user name is any more

My real name is Cory Sklar.

well duh

Oh wow, my German wife's maiden name was Alice Sklar.

My real name is only available to those dear people who thought it would be amusing to investigate the PDF linked near the bottom of this thread. Ned now knows it.

this is reminding me that frequently there are people i follow on tumblr who mention ILX and i realize i have no idea who they are on here and might have two entirely different opinions about the same person

I dunno... Even though half of my username is half of my IRL legal name (the latter half, obvs) and even though anyone with half decent Google fu could suss out my 'secret identity' in about five minutes, I'd probably be kinda weirded out if someone referred to me by my full name on ILX. Which is weird, I guess, given that I had a fairly open and non-anonymized web presence when I first came here years ago. Different times, I guess. Like that whole thing where the sanctity of a private life is practically an archaic notion for many at this point.

voted this is totally fine, but i liked nb&s's most answer out of them all

name's darragh btw feel free

I called DJP by his real name in another thread earlier today and now I'm paranoid that I've pissed him off.

lol no! about 99% of the time ppl calling me Dan are doing so innocuously so I don't usually care; it's when shit gets heated that it annoys me

mind you my surname turned up in a post by a sock/troll a while back and it jarred, full govt name is different i guess

(I'd post on this more but this week work decided to actually make me work, lol)

You guys can call me Peter. or queequeg. I don't mind. At all!

;-)

Peter Grasswich

It makes me feel nice when people remember my name, but I voted Depends on the poster. I rarely call people by their real names but sometimes their first initials.

i try not to use govt names but that's mostly b/c the sheer breadth of my mental jaymc.xls worries and depresses me

I just use board names. It's like playing army. Everyone should just change their names to like golden eagle 1 and golden eagel 2. I don't feel weird referring to DJP or jjjusten by their board names, even though i've known them since before iatee was born. I do get a kick out of people calling me Fluffy Bear or FB, though.

i would prefer it if people would call me "grady"

luckily no-one on ilx can address me by my real name as it cannot be uttered or even thought by the weak shell that is a human

that's not true Bob and you know it!

In the Chicago thread, I think we all pretty much call each other by our first names b/c most of us are IRL friends. However, outside of that thread, I tend to call CHILXORs by their board names instead.

jaymc used my real name the other day while drunkposting and it made me feel good actually

Ha. I actually kind of like it when horseshoe calls me by my real name.

imo if you let members a community of strangers on the internet find out your real name the ball is no longer in your court

― flopson, Thursday, February 2, 2012 1:55 PM (3 hours ago)

boom

I rarely call people by their real names but sometimes their first initials.

This is a good compromise! Familiar but not overly public. Nabisco used to refer to me as "J" -- which I suppose could simply be short for "jaymc," but I always assumed it was a way of saying "Hey, I know you well enough to call you by your real name instead of your ILX pseudonym, but since we're here, I'll be cautious/respectful."

This is the heart of the difference between "old ILX" & "new ILX" - Whether this is something you view as a bunch of ppl you meet in the pub every few weeks or "strangers on the Internet"

This is something that will fundamentally change how you treat others and/or view your interactions. And the slow change from one to another it's weird when you believe it to be one thing but other ppl are treating it as the other. Of course there are going to be tensions in expectations.

Depends on people involved. I'd rather people call me Adam tbh (especially irl – calling me 'aa' in the pub is all manner of wtf), but there are people here (one particular example I think you all know but will not mention by name (no it is not WCC)) who have specific and understandable reasons for keeping a controlled profile, and others who simply don't want their real names to be used. The trouble is knowing EVERYONE'S personal preference, so I always hesitate to use real names unless I'm sure the subject is comfortable with it.

Surnames are out of bounds, obviously.

there really are very few prominent ilx posters who are still 100% anonymous.

― iatee, Thursday, February 2, 2012 2:27 PM (2 hours ago)

an0n

calling me 'aa' in the pub is all manner of wtf

I have had people IRL (namely Laurel and Matthew P3rp3tua) persist in calling me "Jay," even after they learned my real name. Eh, what are you gonna do.

I suppose if it's affectionate and rolls off the tongue it's cool, but I dunno, if say I met a load of ilxors this year and they all knew I'm Adam and persisted with 'aa' ~because that's how they've always known me~ I would become nervous after a while.

mr. almanac

mr. sack

Re first-naming someone who doesn't like you: how the hell can you possibly know? If they don't like you, they don't necessarily ever tell you bluntly, so you're probably getting around the boards calling them Glenda or whatever and they're sitting there fuming. There's no way out of that afaict. btw if I think someone doesn't like me I won't waste my time with them anyway, I'm nearly 40 and cannot be arsed with that playground shit any more.

xp ha
xxp ha

test

The first message board I was ever on there was a guy whose posting name was a google-proofed, yet pronounceable, version of his real name. I still call him that, or a shortened variant, irl.

i will call ppl w/e they want i guess, although out of laziness will often opt for the shortest form of w/e name i think theyll find acceptable. the one exception is i always feel weird using real names or even just older user names that predate my posting to ilx, like using someones childhood nickname when you only met them after college

In my pre-internet BBS yoof I named an acct after the PWEI album that was playing at the time, and for the next 10+ yrs I had actual friends calling me "box" (don't ask)

call other posters by their current display names just to remain on top of things.

i just call everyone "ponch"

There also seems to be this weird dichotomy between ppl who are all "unless you are absolutely sure, err on the side of formality for politeness sake" and people who make such assumptions of informality (which reads as presumptuous intimacy to the former group) that they think it's "playground shit" to not use someone's IRL/first name? (like, isn't that the basic formality, to use someone's stated name until you know them well enough to actually understand when they'd be OK with something else?)

I have no idea if this is me being an aspie or me being a Britishes but presumption of intimacy bugs me way more than being perceived as rudely cold or formal. But that's probably like opening up the tipping debates in terms of cultural gulfs.

"croot" xxp

I have called some ilxors by their real name, people I've never met in person, but I think it never was in another context than a jovial one. This obviously also means I can only have picked up on the real names on here.

I know the names of a bunch of ILXors on Facebook, but just because they've decided that I'm a safe person to have that information doesn't mean that they want the whole world to know who they are on ILX.

Always keep in mind that the 77 registered users now browsing ILX are the only people who read this board. Google "Tre Baker" and soon, you too will find out that you can call (501) 433-1037 for an ass-kicking.

*are not*

the more insidery and cliquish ILX is the better imo

which reminds me: can we get another secret board? its been almost 4 years

I do agree with Michael White (by Dieu, I have *always* though that *was* your real name lol) upthread that the only reason for the backlash on anonimity is marketing. Facebook can't sell data to their advertisers saying "hey this person, Le Bateau Ivre, likes midget porn, might want to serve him some targetted adds *wink*). Money forces us to "be yourself".

MAYBE WE ALREADY HAVE ONE ;)
xpost

If ILX is the expression, 77 sits in brackets, and we need to nest a paranthetical board deeper inside it that occurs at half speed

i like to call it 38.5

7

I *had* mine own secret board but I lost it in the namechange. Dammit, I want it back. ;_;

A friend who I lived with for years went by the name "k3le" on IRC where we met, after the skater k3l3 rozencrantz, but it stuck so solidly that everyone - EVERYONE - called him k3l3 all the time IRL.

It stuck so hard that now, 15 years later, IRC long forgotten about, I cannot bring myself to call him by his real name bcz to me, that IS his real name.

When ppl have used SN's that are fairly... name-sounding? I can get with calling em that all the time. I stuck with a mispelled version of my actual name for this reason - to make it easier for ppl to just call me the same thing regardless. It isnt me "government name" so i dont care.

When I (want to) call ppl by their real name it is usually bcz I know them IRL (eg all the mongrels). Everyone else, I've usually forgotten what yr real names are anyway if I ever knew.

hi trish

lool

I don't know many of you irl but I'd prefer that you don't use my real name if you do, just for the record!

lol thanks kerney

(xxp)

Kerney! This is like finding out Fonzie or Kramer's first name! :)

i think its fine. like breaking into smaller groups at a big party. just don't cop attitude if someone joins your cliquish convo since you are having it on a public borad.

the real name fear tends to be overblown and a bit of an ego trip masquerading as paranoia imo. we are all on the cloud now, man. information on everyone is everywhere.

Did u kno, Comic Book Guys real name is Jeff Albertson. I wonder if he'd insist on being called CBG on his forums.

the real name fear tends to be overblown and a bit of an ego trip masquerading as paranoia imo. we are all on the cloud now, man. information on everyone is everywhere.

Is this sarcasm? Otherwise I strongly disagree. It's rather easy to pass off concerns about one's privacy as "paranoia" or an "ego trip". We aren't all on the cloud by the way, and information of everyone isn't everywhere.
I don't think you can say people are ego-tripping just because they try to shield their personal details from becoming part of the public domain. Which isn't impossible, you know.

xp

I googled my real name and variations of it a few times and it really isnt easy to find anythign that is actual me - thank you, emo kid called Trayce who is all over youtube with his inane vlogs.

Oh so that ISN'T you?

;_;

thank you, emo kid called Trayce

new dn

There also seems to be this weird dichotomy between ppl who are all "unless you are absolutely sure, err on the side of formality for politeness sake" and people who make such assumptions of informality (which reads as presumptuous intimacy to the former group) that they think it's "playground shit" to not use someone's IRL/first name? (like, isn't that the basic formality, to use someone's stated name until you know them well enough to actually understand when they'd be OK with something else?)

― White Chocolate Cheesecake, Thursday, February 2, 2012 5:41 PM (1 hour ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

if you let someone know your name but aren't familiar enough to let them use it, maybe you shouldn't have let them know before you were. i think these presumptions of intimacy are a lot more innocent and a lot less perverse than you make them out to be. i think being in conversation with a group of people who refer to each other by first name casually (as happens constantly on ilx) naturally speeds up the process of familiarization. people regularly call al by his full name, and so posters who are perhaps only somewhat familiar with him feel less inhibited in using it

I will be calling sunny "Sunny" forever.

I really wish I were legally able to tell you some of the stuff that has gone on in my life in the past couple of months so you could understand the not-so-innocent ramifications that this stuff can have.

There is also a difference between telling a bunch of ppl you see every week in the pub what your name is - and having that name made common currency on a messageboard which goes from being a few dozen friends to a massive hub over the course of a dozen years.

I'm sorry you haven't been here long enough to grasp these changes but that does not mean that the concerns are not legitimate

I mean next time I meet ppl in the pub from a messageboard or end up living with them or being in bands with them I'll just continue to tell them my name is Fotherington-Thomas, clearly that's what I should have done all along?

I'm gonna do right by you WCC and not call you by your irl name since you've been straight-up and forthright about it and I respect that and I'm sorry for whatever troubles you've been going through, but you gotta answer me one question:

You just wanted to have a Starbucks name like Rustic Italian Flatbread, didn't you?

So now I know who WCC is. They have every right to not have their name revealed even if they have in the past, but it is difficult to key everyone in on that since no one should expect the whole board to read one thread.

and fwiw, you're not even the poster I was thinking about earlier.

When in doubt, don't. There's no doubt about Ned Raggett, so abuse his name at will. You've already seen me reveal my name in this thread, so have at it. Especially if you want an ass-kicking. But let's not pretend that we're a private club that can be all familiar with each other all the time.

I will be calling sunny "Sunny" forever.

― one little aioli (Laurel), Thursday, February 2, 2012 7:12 PM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

We used to go to the diner where inevitably that Bobby Hebb song would play over the speakers. I'd sing along, and she'd go "Yes?" so demurely. Magic part of our first years being married.

Then the diner burned down and we don't go there anymore.

if you let someone know your name but aren't familiar enough to let them use it, maybe you shouldn't have let them know before you were.

one day i was talking to my dad and he said he'd just been at a meeting and "your friend [x]" was there, and i didn't recognise the name, so i said "[x]?" and my dad said, yes, your friend from the internet, and i worked out that [x] was a person from ilx with whom i got on ok but had never met irl, who'd seen my govt name on a friend's mail-out list and recognised my dad's surname, and who presumably had had some kind of awkward brain-blip that led to blurting out 'i know your daughter from the internet!' and then thinking, oh, shit.

maybe i shouldn't have let this person know who i was before we were properly familiar! oh, wait, i didn't. maybe my friend shouldn't have emailed several people at once some of whom weren't already familiar with one another? maybe i shouldn't be in other people's email address books under my government name? maybe i should have pre-emptively invented a forename-surname pseudonym that people could assume was my government name?

it is a losing battle if you want to 'control' who knows your real name, and tbh if you fight to keep your govt name locked down that's a red rag to anyone who wants to troll you or worse, so all you can do is rely on people having the basic social decency to address you as you'd prefer them to address you, whether that involves the real name or no.

i sometimes wonder what the ruthlessly anon ilxors are hiding but it's probably something banal.

except for am0n, who is actually (REDACTED).

call me anything but don't call me late for breakfast

WCC I think the issue in this case is a lot of ppl (self included) honestly had no idea you objected to your real name being said, at this point in time. How were we to know? Was there a thread somewere I missed.

OTOH changing usernames in the hope one will disappear into the wallpaper and "start again" - as many ppl have done on here - is bound to backfire because really, most people have such distinct posting styles they give themselves away in five seconds flat. I know I would, so Ive never bothered, even tho I have said things on ILX I genuinely regret and wish I could have deleted.

I will say one other thing: if you're gonna call yourself something unweildly like "I am the god of poopchutes" or "Adolf Jingle Bells" I flatly REFUSE to refer to you by that nom de plume, sorry.

adolf jingle bells?!

am0n has galvanized millions of people to 'get real.'

"I am the god of poopchutes" or "Adolf Jingle Bells"

you are the indisputable queen of display names today

people I will definitely call by their ilx names if I ever meet them in real life:
- hoos
- markers
- forks

tbh it was v v hard for me to train myself to not call s1ocki "s1ocki" when we kicked it

c sharp major: sympathize with your situation but if one ilxor's got your gov't name you've basically got to accept that something like that is bound to happen at some point to some people. you only have yourself to blame for not hermetically sealing off your id--and probably would have if it was really that important to you

one day i was talking to my dad and he said he'd just been at a meeting and "your friend [x]" was there, and i didn't recognise the name, so i said "[x]?" and my dad said, yes, your friend from the internet, and i worked out that [x] was a person from ilx with whom i got on ok but had never met irl, who'd seen my govt name on a friend's mail-out list and recognised my dad's surname, and who presumably had had some kind of awkward brain-blip that led to blurting out 'i know your daughter from the internet!' and then thinking, oh, shit.

― kale whale (c sharp major), Thursday, February 2, 2012 8:51 PM (34 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

ha!

Govt names are generally less interesting, and, if they come late in the relationship, seem pointless. Unless your groups cross over and you need to settle on something to save confusion.

If people have especially ace handles, real names can be disappointing; I'm hoping forx' email has a fake name tag on it, because I want to think of forks as forks and (!) it's true that people can cast bad magics on you with the govt name.

I totally called Hoos "Hoos" at least once irl when I meet him.

errr when I met him, rather

I think I might have called Jabba Hands "jabba" when I met him, but I cant recall now (and I cant now remember his real name, haha)

poor jabbadiah

my real name is Potato pls feel free to address me as such

I like that a lot of people call me by this diminutive blend of my 1st name and my display name, v respectful and familiar at the same time. Ppl have called me "abbs" my whole life so it's comfy; admittedly that was a factor in addition to my Flatland-crazedness when I chose "Abbott" as a screenname. I am glad how it's all played out, congrats to everyone.

I very strongly tend to think of ppl as their “original” screen name in my head, and thus am likely to refer to them on-board as that casually – so if they ever used a xtian name as a screen name, it feels OK to address or refer to them as such.

It felt TOTALLY WEIRD AND CLIQUEY when ppl started learning IRL names off facebook and referring to posters here by them – since 99% of the posters would have no idea who “sam” was, it was alienating and counter-communicative to talk to and refer to a “sam” in a thread where no “sam” was posting. This still makes me mildly annoyed or confused when it means I can’t follow a thread, but I’ve long beaten down the emotional anti-cliquey aspect of my instinctual response. (Though not enough that I didn’t feel a little warmth at Noodle’s using irl names if posters never ever use them on-board seems somewhere between cliquish and dickish tbh, tbh.)

“gear” has been “omar little” for so long and so consistently that he’s “omar” in my head. It was a relief to read “have know DJP and jjj....” upthread and go oh THAT’s who Austerity Ponies is, and then more of one when he said he liked when ppl called him FB.

Think of forks as “forks” so much that I forgot there was even a link to The T0fu Hut in his full name when someone was surprised recently.

Nicknames are fun and more distinctive, you know? Ilx0rs in my phone almost all have their login name, or a hybrid of real name and login name. I call edwardo “Ed” to his face but refer to him and introduce him to people as edwardo. We call QGP “QGP” on ILX and IRL even though that’s not even her log-in name!

When I first met estela I said “no, we’re calling you ‘estela’.”

Depends on people involved. I'd rather people call me Adam tbh

See, this would still feel odd since you’ve never posted as Adam (and yr the only regmong apart from Tim F I’ve not met iirc). I’ll try and start off by calling you Mr Frenzy?

tbh too tho I like it when ppl call me by my old ILX-but-not-at-work variation on my xtian name, and feel a bit odd when people call me Sic, especially with the initial capital. But this is bcz it’s just meant to be a visual joke on the Screen Name (login_name) format, and it’s been so long since I’ve had a looks-like-a-real-name in my login that I don’t/can’t expect anyone in broader ILX to know who I was or remember I’ve been other names before.

I totally called Hoos "Hoos" at least once irl when I meet him.

Who WOULDN’T call a hoos Hoos?

(PS has anyone DNed “Horton Hears a HOOS” before?)

tbh i kinda dislike being referred to as "the lex" still after all these years - i never even wanted the definite article in the first place, and it's kind of like, i'd rather be referred to as a person rather than a screen name

This is sort of disappointing! The definite article goes so well with the boldness and stall-setting-out-ness of the persona. Which is probably why it’s gained such traction, along with just sounding great and funny.

Even on ILX I initially used a pseudonym. The only reason I ever started using my IRL name was because ILX was at that point a community of a few dozen posters, most of whom I had met either in London or on tour. It's something I completely regret

I’m v sorry to read this, and am sure that 98-99.976% of ppl addressing you by your IRL name, or a googledodging diminuitive, have always done so due to associating a strong personality with a real person and wanting to acknowledge that person. If you gave one single name that you would prefer, that would make it far far easier for people to switch! Anyway much much more on this below, that you personally might prefer to skip.

c sharp major: sympathize with your situation but if one ilxor's got your gov't name you've basically got to accept that something like that is bound to happen at some point to some people. you only have yourself to blame for not hermetically sealing off your id--and probably would have if it was really that important to you

Curious as to quite how much flopson’s joking here – I think it’s far more common for posters in ILXhubs to at least meet IRL, if not start hanging out all the time, than to so jealously guard internet pseudonymity that you hide your shoddy fleshpod from other meatbags!

TEAL DEERS XING, swerve at will:

There are only two posters I can think of who’ve ever changed from govt xtian to screen names and specifically asked not to have their real identities used in future, and I have to say they’ve played out differently bcz of how each poster handled it.

When J went to a googleproofed version of his IRL name, it was after a minor clusterfuck and bcz he had obv major reasons not to be publicly linked with pissfarting about with his imaginary friends on here, and p much everyone started using the g-proofed first name, even though un-g-proofed it’s super-common, and that seemed nice and polite. When he occasionally switched to various non-real-name screen names, it still seemed most polite to call him by a real name in conversation, so the letter-number-letter-letter version stayed appropriate.
And when, under his current silly screen name, he started a nice, polite thread saying he knew he couldn’t dictate other ppl’s behaviour, but it would be really appreciated if no-one linked his very public dayjob with his posting name any more, almost everyone kindly stepped into line and started having fun with his screen name, and I even mentally call him 43R0 in my head now, not J.

IIRC (and I v much may not) K’s punnish log-in name and her IRL name used to be used at the same time, so when the log-in name became more of a screen name, it felt polite to refer to her as Screen Name, in case ppl didn’t know her IRL name, but to address her as real name, since she’d used it for years. Lots of people have also used a completely un-googleable two-character version of her xtian n, which could be taken as either extra-polite or extra-intimate, depending on how off-ilx well they know her.
There are a variety of reasons why it’s harder to switch off holding this xtian name as the “core” name in one’s head:
Since her persona has remained so strong and consistent while she’s changed through a variety of other screen names, it’s seemed more appropriate to call or think of her by her generally-public real name, to allow for consistency of thought.
On one of her screen names, she repeatedly lied over and over about her identity and gender, and attacked anyone who even innocently and genially identified her as plainly being her. This is, let’s say, an act of bad faith within the ~community~ that discourages ppl from identifying a current screen name as the “core” name in any circumstances, and especially hers.
She has lately cycled through different log-ins and DNs so fast that it’s actively difficult for ppl to even recognise the DN, as opposed to reading “K”’s voice before you get to the DN, and knowing who it is.
She’s flared up at ppl for associating one silly DN with another silly DN (v happy to see the opposite happening upthread!).
Instead of starting a thread asking ppl to call her by a DN or a new consistent fake name, she apparently asked for something in an unrelated thread on another message board altogether that few people were reading, and then hurled abuse at people who greeted her politely and friendly-ly under a “core” name, and claimed that a YEARS-old thread devoted to amiably and helpfully associating new display names with ongoing, non-govt-name, borad personalities was an attack thread about her. This is p much the least helpful way to ask people to kindly do something!
(Similarly, going “I have IRL reasons to not even want my v common govt xtian on the borad anymore plz ty” is more likely to get ppl onside than going “if you knew what was going on IRL you’d all know what awful cunce yr being by not doing what I’m snapping at you about!” And even more so, a long long history of misrepresenting* ppl’s behaviours here as malicious or directed at her have potentially made a lot of posters likely to downgrade their own interpretations of unnamed elsewhere-in-the-real-world activity.)
*due to an entirely genuinely-felt at the time interpretation, I know – but so many people have been on the end of, or witnessed, a lashing-out spray that hasn’t been followed with an apology or calmer interpretation when mood or chemical balance changed, that sympathy to claims of beleaguredness has been systemically eroded.

gr8 thread, don’t know how to vote, happy weekend y’all

There's no doubt about Ned Raggett, so abuse his name at will.

Well I hey now.

^^ rad negging

*nb I don't facebook.

** also it was extra-hard to associate Fothering Thomas with another person when I was still actively associating Fotherington-Thomas with Brian Jones after LoEG: 1969!

Curious as to quite how much flopson’s joking here – I think it’s far more common for posters in ILXhubs to at least meet IRL, if not start hanging out all the time, than to so jealously guard internet pseudonymity that you hide your shoddy fleshpod from other meatbags!

don't you think that--in accordance with the light attitude towards meeting ilxors irl that you value--a hostile attitude towards nonanonymity is kind of antisocial? you can have online friends that know your first name, but for the cost of some increased probability that everything you do online not remain perfectly private. there are formal and informal thresholds between friendship and anonymity, but they at times overlap: learning someone's real name often coincides with meeting them in person. i think a large part of the anonymity choice is made implicitly when you decide to meet ilxors irl, wdyll, fb, etc. off the top of my head i can think of a handful of ilxors of whom i know no personal details and--don't FAP

/the real name fear tends to be overblown and a bit of an ego trip masquerading as paranoia imo. we are all on the cloud now, man. information on everyone is everywhere./

Is this sarcasm? Otherwise I strongly disagree. It's rather easy to pass off concerns about one's privacy as "paranoia" or an "ego trip". We aren't all on the cloud by the way, and information of everyone isn't everywhere.
I don't think you can say people are ego-tripping just because they try to shield their personal details from becoming part of the public domain. Which isn't impossible, you know.

xp

I understand putting a barrier there but it's a losing battle and treating a posting of your real name on ilx like stolen nuclear launch codes is kind of overly dramatic. Most the world doesnt give a shit about your ilx postings. (Thank god for that.)

otm

i feel trapped by anonymity and admire those who seem capable of using ILX as something like a "social networking site", but what are you gonna do? in general, i take my cues from those around me. if dan is dan, then he's dan. if not, he's DJP.

ok when shit gets heated iirc

― onimo, Thursday, February 2, 2012 7:16 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

thaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaank u

ps "hoos" has started bleeding into my real life by way of people who know me through twitter, and now it's started to become weird to even hear my real name from friends IRL

though there's this one dude that happily mispronounces "hoosteen" as "HOOstin," that kinda annoys me

Always go with log-in because I haven't met anyone here irl. The only exception is 'Once A Week Is Ample' cos LJ is easier to type.

TBH I find too much of this stuff distasteful and actually quite boring to be honest. Sic is probably going to read this as "lashing out" which - you know what? - I don't care any more. My personality is not up for debate. And this is what I find so frustrating about this meta stuff - you know how some ppl find it creepy or weird that I google pictures of Aphex Twin or Thom Yorke? I find it distinctly creepy and weird when ppl go to such great length discussing my historical or imagined actions. I can't imagine how boring someone's life must be to find my actions or history (real or projected) remotely interesting. To me, that is genuinely creepy.

I come back to ILX bcuz I wanna discuss Aeroplane remixes or rare Aphex Twin tracks or obscure bits of British coast. I must say that I find it really off-putting to find this (collective projection of) "myself" being brought up for debate. I'll be honest - I find that really creepy.

That is a separate issue - that these two things are getting tangled up 1) pls don't use my gvmnt name bcz: legal issues and 2) I am tired and creeped out by finding my perceived *personna* to be discussed on ILX as if it were a new flavour of pizza or a Radiohead remix. I find that exhausting and demoralising and it makes me angry, and that anger exacerbates the natural sharpness that some ILX0rs have problems with.

This is probably the wrong thread to bring this up on and I fear even mentioning it will attract the drama-bugs like a candle attracts moths but this thread has been pleasant so far, but some of the things in Sic's post just crossed that line for me. I'm trying to be honest not snarky or huffy.

Anyway ending on a lighter note coz I don't wanna do this any more: rustic Italian flatbread? Haha get outta here. WCC isn't even food, it's filth. Cheesecake is slang for Radiohead slash and White Chocolate is current lust object's little nickname for himself. It's an obscure joke that prob no one but myself will get.

And before someone takes issue with the defensive ~tone~ of my post and tells me I can't take criticism. There's a difference between constructive criticism / helpful advice and a public meta dressing-down. One is talking to, and the other is grandstanding about. Oh yeah, also one is private?

It's obvious I'm still carrying a lot of resentment and I need to go do something else for several hours.

"Cheesecake is slang for Radiohead slash"

ILX is full of phrases I never thought I'd read.

OK I was about to praise sic for his post but I'll not, now. I dont think it is a bad thing for ppl to regard someone as having an identifiable "personality" on a board. If you do, its because you have been a consistent, busy member of the board, otherwise how would people pick up on things?

This leads to the question: if you continue to heavily involve yrself in a community, it seems unfair to get angry at people for knowing/acknowledging your persona, because it is *there* and part of the overall milleu of the community. Oherwise we'd have to completely "forget" people like Momus, Ned, Marcello, Dom, etc. And what fun would that be?

the vibrant obvious personalities are what makes ILX what is is!

i'm more into the personality-free vacuums like myself

i'm more into the personality-full vacuums

http://www.henryvacs.co.uk/acatalog/Xtra300.jpg

Proper LOL onimo I needed that.

Trayce there's a difference between saying "x has a vibrant personality" and the stuff that meta clusterfucks descend into. I don't want to get into which part of s's post crossed the line for me bcuz I don't want to pick on him (and even less do I want to dip back into old clusterfucks to find the more egregious examples) and I don't want to re-open old controversies.

i love henry

See, this would still feel odd since you’ve never posted as Adam (and yr the only regmong apart from Tim F I’ve not met iirc).

I completely get what you mean but despite that you're still <REAL NAME> in my head despite all the sicness, and I've seen photos &c. which helps.

When I first met estela I said “no, we’re calling you ‘estela’.”

loooooove this

re indelible personalities etc: If people know who you are and you suddenly appear out of the fog in sunglasses and a fright wig, people are going to be curious and they are going to ask questions. Personally I find blaming a very large community for behaving like a very large community to be ridiculous, and if I were that desperate to not attract mystique I wouldn't go there any more. I would also not put my hand in a bag of hand-eating spiders and complain that they were eating my hand. Reiterating: I will not call anyone by their first (or any) name unless I know the victim is sound with it, and when in doubt I just won't do it at all, but I also get that other people are not mind-readers and/or do not read every single post in every single thread in every single bloody test iteration of ilx.

i don't care what anyone calls me

ok adolf jingle bells

"ajb" to my buddies

lol :)

Actully sic is a good example for me: I know him as the Other SN he used to use on here, and never knew his real name. A while ago someone said "you know C he's been at yr house bla bla" and used his actual name and for a very long moment i was like "WHO ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT" and I still dont tend to think of sic as anything but Other Username.

haha I can't even remember his other username any more

But thats a more complex situ borne out of him working with one of my oldest friends and me not knowing about it at the time, so.

he was k1t. OH NO should I not say this? lol.

sorry Im drunk.

oh god i thought that WAS his real name, I suck at "in real life"

Also I am glad one of my insane made up SNs has been adopted hahaha tk lb!

To be srs for a moment tho: wcc, I respect and get yr concerns with this whole issue, I dont argue it really. My point was just that I didnt know it was an issue, because like I assume a lot of ppl here it is impossible to keep up with the entirety of the borads.

Hello.

When I first came here, I read stuff, and tentatively posted a couple times under an old alias.

I then joined in w/my real 'govt' full name, and why not, nothing I ever said here was not things I'd say in real life and my 'opinions' are not terribly controversial. (Funnily enough, a couple of ILXors recognised me and referred to me by my old alias which surprised me - how did they recognise? I'm fairly anonymous by ILX standards)

Anyway, when ILX went down then came back, I took on the abbrev version you see here. I used to post 'cuet' pics of the kids or tales of the funny things they said or did but now they are both young ladies with Facebooks and look after their own internet presence. I rarely talk about my wife, not because ahhm a lady chasing etc but because she is a private person and would not appreciate tales out-of-school (in fact I'd maybe prefer this thread degoogled.. anyway)

Some times, people refer me with surname, I go Tsk, and it's mildly irritating but whatever..

A lot of people do say things like "lol you don't know who 'aerosmith' is?" but whatever also.

I understand putting a barrier there but it's a losing battle and treating a posting of your real name on ilx like stolen nuclear launch codes is kind of overly dramatic. Most the world doesnt give a shit about your ilx postings. (Thank god for that.)

― bnw, Friday, 3 February 2012 08:36 (2 hours ago) Bookmark

This I totally agree with btw, for the record

I understand putting a barrier there but it's a losing battle and treating a posting of your real name on ilx like stolen nuclear launch codes is kind of overly dramatic. Most the world doesnt give a shit about your ilx postings. (Thank god for that.)

Actually when you consider the sort of thing that's happened to prominent former ILX posters who made the mistake of posting their real name...

I sometimes wish I'd made mine and my family's identity less visible but I can't really do much about it now. I usually don't mind getting govt first name treatment, especially if it's someone I've actually met. I usually don't like my surname being used - I think I got annoyed once at someone using it when I was bragging about breeding.

I sometimes get annoyed with certain posters using irl names or irl researching your life details as I kind of feel there's a veneer of friendly enquiry that is either overly familiar or is done to show other people that they know about you - but that varies from poster to poster. I suppose it depends how genuine I feel things are.

(not sure I'm explaining that correctly - like someone you've never physically met goes "Hi Frank how's things with Betty and Frank Jnr in Fucksville?" and my first reaction is "Who the fuck are you and why are you spilling this shite on the board" - even if none of it is "secret")

Oh look dont get me wrong, I strongly object to anyone on here doing "digging" that has little to do with the persons posts and they are trying to find dirt, and I know for a fact this happens even now - there are people on ILX who are looking for anything incriminating they can find for whatever reasons. Why? fuckknows. It shits me though.

but it happens on SA/4chan/usenet/livejo/etc so i dunno, fuck the internet. it sucks.

onimo, what do you breed, if you don't mind me asking?

(note: i don't know your surname)

children

'e don't live in Fucksville for nothin'

i remember when i first joined ilx my mind was totally blown that there were people on the internet using their full real names.

i'm not really in a position to mind if someone uses my surname - and tbh anyone who gives the slightest shit can probably link every online profile i've ever had to each other and my IRL identity and in some ways that might even be a positive (erm or that might just be something i tell myself) - but it does give me a slight start when it happens here. like i know i can be traced to here but i don't want to make it THAT easy.

Most the world doesnt give a shit about your ilx postings.

sadly this isn't that true, i'm not sure most ilxors quite realise just how many lurkers there are here (my mind was blown when i realised). and by nature of being lurkers they obv take a keen interest in this board and its posters.

i h8 lurkers tbh

i h8 lurkers tbh

SB disappears for three days and we're getting all cocky about the silent majority. These guys can take you down in a morning!

re indelible personalities etc: If people know who you are and you suddenly appear out of the fog in sunglasses and a fright wig, people are going to be curious and they are going to ask questions.

this is partly true but in practice it's mostly shit-stirrers who deliberately make a big deal out of it, right?

the people one interacts with most on ilx aren't usually the ones asking those questions, so it's understandable to be a bit annoyed when people you aren't as close with are the ones suddenly being all "curious" about you. i've seen posters ask other posters prying-type questions about me on sub-boards and it's kind of like, bitch we never interact so wtf do you need to know that for. if you want to know stuff about me, get to know me like a normal person (and like many posters have done).

i have long had a "i h8 lurkers" stance everywhere on the internet!

actually it's partly b/c i like talking to new people. show yr faces it's not that scary.

Lex I can't recall every interacting on here, semi-lurker that I am. So HELLO!

HELLO!

idk the problem with someone reappearing w/sunglasses and a fright wig is it can feel like they are doing an internet "social experiment" and i hate that shit.

hi there i'm new here

i mean, i had an email from an old ilx friend in october saying "wait, you're c sharp major on ilx now?" so obviously i have done the sunglasses/fright wig thing myself

didn't you used to be lamp?

xpost

There are a few obvious examples where it seems fine to call people by their names (people who have it as their sign-in like Ned, Kev or Darragh, for example - or people where it is so ubiquitus that it has obviously stopped being a thing like Erica or Dan P).

There are a few examples where I'm still unsure so I might say their name but googleproof it or whatever (i dunno how [x i am also facebook friends with for example] feels about his/her gov. name being used so if i ever slip into using it, i'll try to at least make it less awkward).

There are people who expressly don't like it being used, so the only time I will use it is trying to identify them (for example when moving to the sandbox and everyone had different names). Personally I don't see what is so wrong with asking if a certain Aphex Twin fan is K***, considering that name could mean anything or anyone on the whole bloody internet, but if it weirds people out then I'll try to respect it and know to apologise if I mistakingly use it and annoy them.

Most of you fucks I don't know by name.

---

I think it is quite obvious my name is Sam and people regularly use it and I am cool with that. Use my whole government name if you really want, its not like I'm worried my posts about football and right wing newspapers are going to freak out future employers.

It's never occurred to me that I shouldn't use my real name here. But, I'd never use someone's first name here if it were not their user name or if I wasn't on a first name bases with that person. I've always tried to used the same social graces online as in person.

xpost to same

you are, i think, the only poster whose real name I've used without having met them first (where their real name is not the same as or close to their dn).

just feels overly familiar and presumptuous to me.

I am happy to remove anyone's real name if they're uncomfortable with it and haven't put it there themselves. Seems like a pretty basic courtesy to me.

that said, quite happy for anyone to use mine (where it's known). it feels like a friendly acknowledgement in some way.

Ok, TBH, I have *done* the social experiment thing, but the other way around - on the Sandbox I gave my login to several different ppl to - so that at one point half a dozen ppl were posting as "Fotherington Thomas" - purely to see if ppl were reacting to what I was saying, or the fact they thought it was "me" saying it.

It was an interesting experiment, not one I'd repeat outside the liminal zone of the Sandbox - I don't think it proved anything (just confirmed my expectations) - but I don't think that "social experiments" are automatically a terrible thing OR done with bad intentions, as ppl seem to be implying here.

But I recognise that's not something everyone is gonna agree with and is only going to confirm negative opinions that ppl have already formed.

(what has struck me over the years is not that ppl have recognised me in new names when I've been making no effort to hide myself - but how many of my alternate names or former socks have gone completely undetected + unremarked on.) Perception of identity is such a weird thing

xpost to same

you are, i think, the only poster whose real name I've used without having met them first (where their real name is not the same as or close to their dn).

just feels overly familiar and presumptuous to me.

― Upt0eleven, Friday, 3 February 2012 12:10 (3 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Is this to me but with a typo?

I think you are more likely to find first-name basis within certain groups on ilx. Like sure I'd be a lot less surprised by someone from ILF like you using my name than seeing it the once every 6 months I pop on to a techno bobbins thread.

wcc, that is an awesome experiment.

And TBH it's not even the googleproofing of the name - some ppl may be completely anonymous bcuz there are 6 million "Marks" on the Internet. But some specific combinations of gender, name, location and industry are rare and identifiable in a way that I did not *realise* until I got approached by an investigative journalist from a Broadsheet who had put a bunch of connections together.

So saying "that name could mean anything to anyone" - no, actually, from experience, I can tell you that's bullshit so pls stop using me as an example, thanks.

totally - needing anonymity isn't as reductive as just not wanting your first name and surname out there, it's about enabling people from putting 2+2 together in all sorts of ways

again it's the lurker issue - i think we all assume that most visible ILX posters know all sorts of personal details about each other and mostly trust each other with that, and we all understand you can't stop that happening. but you don't know who's lurking or why they're lurking.

Given the number of journalists who are "out" and posting on ILX and the submerged iceberg principle with regards to lurkers - just think about what that means for a moment.

Anyway I gotta get out of bed + go for a walk or something. This stuff freaks me out + winds me up.

xxp

Lex- I think I've linked to articles you have written for the Guardian before, so apologies if this was bad form.

i remember when i first joined ilx my mind was totally blown that there were people on the internet using their full real names.

iirc your name was in the email address that used to be displayed right after every logged-in poster's display name?

(which *does* strike me as a bit of a trouble magnet in retrospect)

but this is a public(ly readable) forum! I suppose use 77 or wherever if you don't want the world to see your posts? The alt would be to make the whole thing login-only but many reg ilxors wouldn't be happy with that.

Lex- I think I've linked to articles you have written for the Guardian before, so apologies if this was bad form.

― pandemic, Friday, 3 February 2012 13:36 (1 minute ago) Bookmark

I think Lex - and other journalists - have linked to ILM directly too tbf

Lex- I think I've linked to articles you have written for the Guardian before, so apologies if this was bad form.

no no no this is totally fine! i am very appreciative when people do that.

and many on here, WCC included, speak about or link to ILX from twitter or something. It's a two way thing.

When I first met estela I said “no, we’re calling you ‘estela’.”

Kinda shaking a little bit at the realization behind this statement. estela has a different irl name?

i pretty much subscribe to what my friend jesse terms "radical transparency" when it comes to online profiles and IRL stuff. it's all out there and i'm lucky in that it mostly benefits me rather than potentially harms me (i hope).

iirc your name was in the email address that used to be displayed right after every logged-in poster's display name?

wasn't that only semi-displayed? i think the fact that so many people appeared to be using their actual names emboldened me to do sorta-the-same

Tbh, the only reason I was HI DERE for so long was that I created the screen name without realizing that nu-ILX names were permanent, then wondered how long it would take to connect "HI DERE" to "Dan" if I didn't connect them myself. (it was very comical how quickly some ppl noticed, actually!)

everybody's friend underrated aerosmith bootlegs once (playfully) admonished mecoff-board that the posters (including, at the time, yourvuncle strongo) who complained about their on-board personalities being easily pegged/caricatured hadcoften been the ones who'd done the most to put that personality out there, however much it had to do with the roiling internal muchness of "the real you." there *is* a performative aspect to ilx posting, one that's not always entirely a conscious action on the part of the performer. privacy concerns aside, new screen names as a reboot don't always work when a person has spent years consciously or inadvertently creating a character, or at least a recognizable style.

like i know i can be traced to here but i don't want to make it THAT easy

This goes for me, kinda. I don't use my real name on ILX, but people I've been in email contact with for poll stuff will know my first name and that's not something that bothers me. My first name is not completely rare but it's distinctive enough that you could put it together with a few details I've dropped about where I live/work and find my professional webpage reasonably quickly. I'm not a "public figure" with hundreds of disgruntled fans looking to punish me for a one-star Drake review but there will be people from all over googling my name in a work capacity and I don't want a situation where some malicious idiot associates my name with, em, "unprofessional" content for the world to search and find.

I frankly have been changing screen names so frequently because I never like the one I choose, not because I want to avoid identification.

You can use either for me. Permission granted.

beachville, I note that Trayce's second suggestion upthread remains unclaimed. Take it, it's yours!

I'm not a "public figure" with hundreds of disgruntled fans looking to punish me for a one-star Drake review

heh i'm still getting angry tweets from them.

i'm not concerned with work stuff getting tied to ILX stuff - it's been a benefit, there's little point worrying about it by this point, i pretty much assume everyone in the media/music industries who cares knows b/c they're not stupid. the people i don't nec want prying around on ilx about me are basically a) family b) crepes.

i was anonymous for years and years on ilx as i was paranoid about people knowing who i was. But I don't talk about personal stuff ever so hopefully i dont have to suffer what someone like LJ might..
As long as my full name isn't used its not so bad, but my name is unusual (for a first name anyway) so i do worry that someone might go snooping. But then again if family or friends irl go snooping they would probabbly find me anyway.
If someone calls me by my first name i usually respond to them using theirs. If someone doesn't want their first name used then dont use mine in return.

I'll stick to Ratfucker, or Mr Ratfucker if you prefer.

Whoops, I think I called you by your first name on the metal poll thread. Sincere apologies. Will stick to ASR from now on.
xp

We call QGP “QGP” on ILX and IRL even though that’s not even her log-in name!

I'm sorry, I have to ask: Is this KBP's gf?

xpost to ASR

Yeah but you posted as <Your First Name> for ages, you kinda have to make people know if you don't want them to use it (I just did yesterday on some metal thread, sorry I'll try to remember from now on).

(I wouldn't be bothered at all if you used my first name in response because it's so common, but I'd hate to have my full name on here)

the point about 'use my first name if you would use it irl' doesn't hold together for me- if ilx landed en masse in a warehouse tomorrow and we started flitting around interacting in different groups/conversations then, what, 'hello there mr dog latin may i call you x' or 'why, it's DJP whom i've never actually met but i know quite a lot about his toiletry habits, do i call him 'd' or 'djp' or 'dan' or 'mr pry' i mean, imo first name would be a natural identifier there. We are not strangers to each other- by virtue of social interaction online it's not a valid to claim that we are. I agree the first names shouldn't come from outside ilx and get bandied about, i agree that the username is as good as any (we have to address each other somehow) but where fname is and has been broadly used and acknowledged in the community i think that must be acknowledged as a factor for you to consider if you are addressed that way by a poster you wouldn't necessarily have expected it from.

I'm in the odd situation that I've been off ILX for a long time, so there are a lot of people who have changed DN but I don't recognise, but who have been at the new one for longer than I ever knew them in their old one.

Also my mind has been blown by A) the first example in sic's post, particularly since I've literally switched from thinking "I like the cut of that poster's jib" in one tab to initiating an anonymous transaction of cash from me to his public persona (through 1,000 other people no doubt, so enjoy that $0.01, sir!) and then B) sic's ID.

I suppose some part of me is wondering if it's all old ILXORs, and no-one ever really left (wakes up crying).

i remember when i first joined ilx my mind was totally blown that there were people on the internet using their full real names.

IIRC it used to be that when you registered for ILX, you were asked to enter

1. Full Name
2. E-mail Address

I think a lot of people may not have realized, when they registered, that "Full Name" would function as a display name. And then perhaps they decided to keep it, anyway, because it was less of a hassle.

i mean, i had an email from an old ilx friend in october saying "wait, you're c sharp major on ilx now?" so obviously i have done the sunglasses/fright wig thing myself

Tbh, I only made the connection between this and your previous name when someone (Lex?) recently used it when addressing you.

if ilx landed en masse in a warehouse tomorrow and we started flitting around interacting in different groups/conversations then

i really really really hate it when people use internet aliases to address people IRL (this definitely goes for people who say "the lex" out loud)

yeah! i think it would be a ridiculous thing to do- but i'm not saying carte blanche on name usage, i'm just saying it's not really a fair comparison to call other ilxors strangers just because you haven't met them.

I've never met an other ilxor btw

Dude even people we know who don't post on ILX and never have done refer to you as 'The Lex' in everyday conversation.

I mean it is at least very closely related to your name and better than having people call you, say, 'Colonel Poo' in the pub.

yeah that's it though, it's so close to my name so why not just say lex!

I didn't realise the definite article bothered you so much.

i mean it's pretty slight, i'm not gonna cut anyone off if they use the definite article in the same way that i would if they eg voted for destroyer in the ilm poll. just a preference really

i guess i mind it less in all-ilx gatherings, in mixed gatherings it tends to lead to quizzical looks from offline friends and then...explanations

I used to have Colonel Poo's number saved in my phone under "Colonel Poo".

The only time I've ever encountered name/username issues irl was spotting g-kit at ATP and calling over to attract his attention before realising that I was shouting something which no-one calls him irl. Surprisingly, it confused him too, I still assumed he would answer to it.

I tend to be less formal on chattier threads (ILF threads, Scottish football threads pre-ILF, old watercooler thread etc) but that's probably a whole other can of worms.

"Do you mind if I call you 'The' for short?"

I used to have Colonel Poo's number saved in my phone under "Colonel Poo".

That would surely lead to confusion at some point? He's down as "ILX Colonel Poo" in mine.

Aye, changed it to his real name to stop confusion with all the other Colonel Poos.

We are many

my name is legion

colonel legion poo

I didn't know you preferred just plain "lex", lex. Well now I know.

I just remembered that I once yelled "Roxy!" at one of her band's shows without realizing it wasn't her real name.

Roxanne M. Uzak.

when i first got here i posted under my first name ("al") for a few years, then under a variation of my first name (as one of the many "Alex in _____"s) for a couple more years, then under the most deliberately generic handle i could think of, which of course became pretty recognized in and of itself over time. there were always people on ilx who i had hung out with IRL or talked to off-board and my identity was never a secret, but some of those people (mainly darrenscoq/ramose and ethan) would occasionally address me by my last name and i didn't really care, although later that led to a LOT of people doing that, which got a little annoying. i complained about someone using my surname in a display name once and that person rationalized that it was okay because I had done it myself, but that was like one time when i was trying to register a new login years and years ago and accidentally put my name where i thought you were just putting contact info or something and posted under my full name like twice. now one of the ILM threads most consistently on ILM new answers for the past couple months says it was started my "Ship1ey Gohard" which is just...ugh. but not really because i care about my anonymity.

IIRC it used to be that when you registered for ILX, you were asked to enter

1. Full Name
2. E-mail Address

I think a lot of people may not have realized, when they registered, that "Full Name" would function as a display name. And then perhaps they decided to keep it, anyway, because it was less of a hassle.

― jaymc, Friday, February 3, 2012 9:00 AM (49 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

oh yeah this is how i ended up w/ name as dn that one time.

anyway i think it's REALLY crazy when people who posted under the real name for literally years get mad if later people address them that way and 'blow their cover,' but obviously first names and last names/full names are totally different categories of specificity or necessity

I mean it is at least very closely related to your name and better than having people call you, say, 'Colonel Poo' in the pub.

― Matt DC, Friday, February 3, 2012 2:10 PM (35 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Ha! I forgot C. Poo's real name the second time I met him and couldn't bring myself to call him 'Colonel Poo' in public. And then I ran away.

You never had to enter your full name. You had a permanent username (hidden on the thread), an email address, and a display name. The display names could be changed on a whim but the username would be the same. When we moved over to the new code, suddenly both the usernames and the display names were visible for old posts.

Some dude, didn't someone once use your full real name as a synonym for a full real name? I remember loling @ that.

no my name was used as a euphemism for a government name because i have a blog called 'government names'

i prefer to be addressed in all polite and gentlemanly occassions as "jon foreward slash via foreward slash chi two point oh".

it would be really funny to hear someone addressed that way IRL

xxp Oh, I never got the connection. I still thought it was funny. And gov't name is what I meant by "full real name."

oh yeah i know but i mean that specifically was why my name was used that way

iirc it was whiney that said it and it definitely amused me (and i think was on 77 so i didn't mind at all)

i prefer to be addressed in all polite and gentlemanly occassions as "jon foreward slash via foreward slash chi two point oh".

I say it as John Via Cheeto in my head.

lol that might be better

It was a relief to read “have know DJP and jjj....” upthread and go oh THAT’s who Austerity Ponies is, and then more of one when he said he liked when ppl called him FB.

tbh it's weird to be called Fluffy bear irl, but it's rare and only when meeting ilxors, and really it is my fault for choosing Fluffy Bear hearts Rainbows as a logon name. Now that I'm back on as Austerity Ponies, I feel I can be taken seriously.

now one of the ILM threads most consistently on ILM new answers for the past couple months says it was started my "Ship1ey Gohard" which is just...ugh. but not really because i care about my anonymity.

lmao

I stumbled across ILM in a link to a thread here about a group I liked. This was shortly after I first got a computer and broadband, so although I'd used the internet a fair amount before that, I'd never bothered to post to a forum or anything because I wouldn't have had the time/access to go back and see any responses. Because of that I didn't actually realise that I didn't have to use my real name and real e-mail address (which had my real name in it) when I first posted (this was early 2004, before you had to be registered). Also, I didn't have any idea I would carry on visting this site for year after year. If I'd known these things I would never have used my name in the first place. Instead I slowly backed away from it - first changing my display name, then losing the e-mail address, and the changing my display to something else after the great crash.

This thread title keeps reminding me of "Poster Nutbag", from the Phish song Harpua.

John Via Cheeto is amazing

am i wrong in assuming the 'rules' for this change slightly for posters who are active in public media? seems like they go to the extreme ends -- either ppl who are known and their posting here is sort of (sort of) of a piece with their public writing. and then ppl who have another public career and want to keep this space separate.

jvc2, At least I can now hum something in my head besides that Wilco song.

lol

I think the most obvious case was how Steven Tyler came to posting here, I think he was pretty reasonable about the hows and whys.

is there anyone in the latter category besides steven tyler and barack "dr. morbius" obama?

iirc, he prefers "dr. 'mittens and bam' morbius"

barack "dr. morbius" obama

thank you for making the politics threads fun again

there was that man Momus who i believe was on the run from the law in more than one asian country

dr3w?

deej

xpost to ASR

Yeah but you posted as <Your First Name> for ages,

ive NEVER posted with my real name ever. Im sorry to break it to you guys but Herman is not my real name either.
I think what you mean is when ilx came back it was fucked up and used the old login names that didn't show up until the recoding and couldnt or wouldnt be changed. That however was not my fault. I never ever used it though.
Online people just call me pfunk, as thats the online name ive used for 12 years. I dont mind now if people sometimes use my first name in a thread as long as i can use theirs back.

I'll always think of you as Algerian Goalie fwiw

Pfunkboy 4 life

OK I guess that is what I mean, there are loads of posts with (<ASR's real name>) after them. Didn't realise why that was.

it wasnt that way at the time. if i had known it would eventually show up i would never have used it.

OT: was there ever a connection between Herman G. Neuname and Whiney G. Weingarten?

no

herman g neuname came from the watercooler where we gave ourselves krautrock names

Herman was chosen simply because its been a lifelong ambition to meet a German called Herman. Sadly none of my German online friends know of any either. Apparently it's a very old fashioned name.

one thing I'd say is that I think it's counterproductive for people who don't want to be associated w/ their real first name to change usernames frequently, cause it becomes harder to permanently associate you w/ one goofy online handle and it leads to many situations of people asking 'who's X?' and there being no easy answer outside of yr first name.

Doesn't it still display your 'original' username in brackets?

he means when they get a whole new username with different email

colonel poo is in my phone under his real name btw. Since he might get confused with General Poo and Field Marshall Poo

one thing I'd say is that I think it's counterproductive for people who don't want to be associated w/ their real first name to change usernames frequently, cause it becomes harder to permanently associate you w/ one goofy online handle and it leads to many situations of people asking 'who's X?' and there being no easy answer outside of yr first name.

QFT.

Or, if your first name isn't commonly known, you end up being called by whatever you first posted as, e.g., beachville being referred to as kkvgz.

didn't know that!

oh so thats who he is

Lol thanks ASR, had no idea!

i might go back to algerian goalie

yeah i mean...the fact that i actually am referred to as 'some dude' more often than not is due wholly to the fact that i've stuck w/ that handle for like 4 years (xpost)

ok lol @ that dn

i signed in as algerian goalkeeper but when i went to post it said i was barred, lol.

can a mod fix that please? it remains from last years self-ban

what about Herman Rarebell from the Scorpions

he can't be that hard to meet

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Herman_Rarebell

Later on, he co-created Monaco Records with Prince Albert of Monaco .

I will call ppl whatever they want to be called and try to refrain from calling them anything until I know what's what. I have not always followed those rules and it hasn't always worked out, so that's the way I do it these days. Also it's just gross to insist that you have a better claim on another person's identity than he/she do and refuse to respect hi/her wishes about what to call him/her.

I was going to make the same observation as jaymc did above that I tend to use ppl's first names in the ChILX thread, since I know most of them IRL, but refer to those same ppl by their user names in other threads (jaymc and La Lechera being prime examples). Except Jesse, who I cannot refer to as "Je55e."

As common as my first name is, I think about ditching it for a more low key dn a lot, just to be safe and for peace of mind. Might do it soon, even, and I will not care if you still call me "jenny."

Someone I knew had a car called Herman, does that count?

Oh and since we're talking about names and confusion, are the two posters with "Autumn Almanac" in their names (one dn, one user name) the same person?

same guy but he has 2 usernames. one at work comp one at home i think

To be serious for a moment about Softly Weeping at the Oki Dog's point* I do think that the language of (especially male) 'performance' in bed is a bit of a noxious one, and probably counter-productive as far as making both partners enjoy their time in bed goes. But I've probably said this elsewhere on ILE before.

* I hate the internet for making me write this sentence.

― Alba (Alba), Wednesday, September 1, 2004 4:57 PM (7 years ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

^^ classic post that really says it all about ungainly long and over the top display names

I forgot that some dude is an alex and not an albert or an alvin or alan or aldrich

or an alba

some dude is jessica alba

jessica alba is some dude

"aldrich in baltimore" just didn't have the same ring to it

I refer to people by their user names. I assume at least some people here know my actual name but no one's ever addressed me with it iirc

Well thats just blatantly untrue Lord Abercrombie Heathcliffe Willowsbye III.

What if someone googles your nameand it finds your post where you said "clits is nice"

Then they'd be all I need to get to know this stud.

Hey Lex I'm p sure I have never really 'interacted' with you on ILX but I met you irl one time years ago, very briefly, before I ever really posted on ILX. Dunno if that's weird.

!!

i don't think that's weird per se but i would like to know, um, where? and who?

(you can webmail if you want)

Oh and since we're talking about names and confusion, are the two posters with "Autumn Almanac" in their names (one dn, one user name) the same person?

― gonna give her the old fuquay-varina (Jenny), Saturday, 4 February 2012 03:40 (4 hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

same guy but he has 2 usernames. one at work comp one at home i think

― Armand Schaubroeck Ratfucker, Saturday, 4 February 2012 03:41 (4 hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Yeah. Reasons I made the other account are

1. This acct's email address has been dead for years, admins can't get me through it etc
2. Wanted to log in from a work PC without giving my workplace access to 77 (100% out of respect for 77 users)

What I SHOULD have done is given the other account a better name, but I didn't, and now I'm stuck with it, and it probably looks like a sock, and I don't do socks, and I don't even want to be perceived as the type of person who does socks. Cock-up is where I'm going with this.

I could make a third ilx acct but I really, really don't want to shit up ilx with fake email addresses because that would fail to address point 1 above.

I once made an acct user called " in yr wardrobe" to make a one off Genesis joek then forgot all about it, I wonder if it got purged?

And I'm back

is there a thread where people can go and announce to the hivemind who they are now that they're using a different username?

ILX2 NEW USERNAME TRANSLATOR COMPENDIUM

being in the ANSDFanMRPDNM board doesn't help though

oh.
well.
The thread where people can go and announce to the hivemind who they are now that they're using a different username

<3

I have to admit I am uncomfortable with people assuming familiarity with anyone on any forum unless it is clear that they are "friends" - either online as professional collaborators or regular contacts, or as real offline friends.

BH Ideas

xp yeah, that's one step away from asking for an autograph imo

Automatic thread bump. This poll is closing tomorrow.

I guess I just still don't understand that mentality - it's just so childish, so petty - of ppl who are so desperate for, I dunno, beef? attention? drama? That they gotta go running for a meta thread every time they see a poster do something. There's a real air of "ooh mummy, I smell ~drama~!!!" about it that's kind of pathetic in an adult. Like I said before, if your life is so dull you find my actions that interesting, I actually feel quite sorry for you.

^^still talking about how she hates talking about it

Yes I'm an idiot that I take the bait every damn time. But who's the asshole, the idiot who takes the bait or the person that views shit-stirring as entertaining LOLs?

Yeah, it'll end in tears. I shouldn't have said anything, mea culpa.

*stirs shit*

Whites a Minority?

^^^loooool imagine if that w4lter poster were a gershy post

w4lter

http://i4.photobucket.com/albums/y115/kitbrash/wilted.jpg

lol lol

yo whats w/ the book next to that that appears to have barack and michelle standing on the white house lawn in swimwear?

are those paperdolls?

i hope the poll results are a landslide win for "it depends" because c'mon some posters have unwillingly had their real names dragged onto the board while others posted under it for YEARS AND YEARS AND YEARS and then acted like they could put that genie back in the bottle

if you be my bodyguard i will be your long lost pal

Automatic thread bump. This poll's results are now in.

top 3 all basically otm

Heavily populated poll, this!

yo whats w/ the book next to that that appears to have barack and michelle standing on the white house lawn in swimwear?

blame estela for covering it up, but yeah I'm 90% sure it's paper dolls

yep

jealous of sic for kickin it w estela irl

"kickin it w/sic" should be a tv show

they could be in a band called estelica

What's weird is when you meet a poster but you still think of their forum name as their 'real' name. I still think of Ned as Ned even though I've met him several times.
It'll sink in one day.

― Ned Raggett, Thursday, 2 February 2012 19:19 (2 years ago)

Ned isnt Ned?!

confusing post

Ned = Ned is our new Objectivist credo.

néd est un autre

this is reminding me that frequently there are people i follow on tumblr who mention ILX and i realize i have no idea who they are on here and might have two entirely different opinions about the same person

― rob, Thursday, 2 February 2012 19:59 (2 years ago) Bookmark

also this. can we do a non-judgemental "am I friends with u on Feb cos idk it if we are" kinda thread

You're friends with me d

well duh tbf

hmm wait I am not good at this

I once made an acct user called " in yr wardrobe" to make a one off Genesis joek then forgot all about it, I wonder if it got purged?

― thanks to denial, I'm immortal! (Trayce), Saturday, 4 February 2012 08:36 (2 years ago)

I have no recollection now of doing this, haha.