Post the funniest slam another ILXer has made about you

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Adam are you black, and 40, and a chick?

― ddb (ddb), Wednesday, January 5, 2005 6:03 PM (7 years ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

gygax! II: pornograffitti (admrl), Thursday, 16 August 2012 20:57 (twelve years ago)

I guess the name Jaq, associated with engineering, conjured an image of a balding Frenchman in my mind.

― nasa_esa_fun, Monday, August 15, 2005 10:57 AM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Jaq, Thursday, 16 August 2012 21:12 (twelve years ago)

you are weird dude. a creepy dude. you're always popping up on threads with like little nuggets of 'info' about various ILX people that you've gleaned from their posting. and that whole thing about spotting me at the michael mayer gig ... i dunno, weird. Yeah, I guess i snapped at you a couple times on maybe one or two threads .. but fuck it I snap at people all the time. And *everyone on ILX* snaps at other people *all the time*. so i really don't get this weird obsession you seem to have. Like, I really don't dig the fact that you've posted little snarky comments after things I post on ILM ... or follow me around and post links to ages old things I've posted elsewhere. Really fuckin creepy behavior dude. But basically i just ignore it, you know? And yeah, I don't know that we would really get along, primarily because your taste in music fucking SUCKS! BIG TIME! stop being a frickin follower-boy ILM hiveminder and get one taste for chrissakes. try listening to some records made before the year 2000 once in a while. jesus.

― Stormy Davis (diamond), Sunday, March 27, 2005 10:09 PM (7 years ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

doglatting (jaymc), Thursday, 16 August 2012 21:12 (twelve years ago)

2005 was glorious obv.

Jaq, Thursday, 16 August 2012 21:14 (twelve years ago)

Haha yeah that was a good one. I remember it

gygax! II: pornograffitti (admrl), Thursday, 16 August 2012 21:14 (twelve years ago)

how are you guys finding these? do you just remember them?

congratulations (n/a), Thursday, 16 August 2012 21:16 (twelve years ago)

the balding french engineer thing has stuck with me, I'll admit

Jaq, Thursday, 16 August 2012 21:18 (twelve years ago)

Yeah every time I play a record by some vaguely MOR-ish R&B dude, I think of DDB's post

gygax! II: pornograffitti (admrl), Thursday, 16 August 2012 21:19 (twelve years ago)

and I laugh, with my mouth

gygax! II: pornograffitti (admrl), Thursday, 16 August 2012 21:20 (twelve years ago)

I was just reading the Breaking Bad thread -- I'm only caught up through S4 E1, so no spoilers! -- and had to lol at this:

Written by David Segal, hm - I wonder if that's the same Dave Segal who used to post on ILM (and cheerfully threatened to murder my entire family)?

― Myonga Vön Bontee, Tuesday, July 12, 2011 12:43 PM (1 year ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

doglatting (jaymc), Friday, 17 August 2012 14:56 (twelve years ago)

mr. snrub you are a motherfucking idiot. with every post you make i believe this more and more.
― Jams Murphy (ystrickler), Tuesday, January 4, 2005 4:01 PM (5 years ago) Bookmark

Mr. Snrub, Friday, 17 August 2012 15:40 (twelve years ago)

there must be some good ones about me, but i can't remember where they might be.

Julian Asshole (dog latin), Friday, 17 August 2012 15:44 (twelve years ago)

"I actually once thought ENBB was a pretty cool poster, but now I'm starting to think she's kind of a bitch."

For the record I'm bitchin but I'm not a bitch.

(✿◠‿◠) (ENBB), Friday, 17 August 2012 15:47 (twelve years ago)

Usually.

(✿◠‿◠) (ENBB), Friday, 17 August 2012 15:47 (twelve years ago)

It's all in the eyebrows, fwiw.

Aimless, Friday, 17 August 2012 15:50 (twelve years ago)

I have bitchy eyebrows?

(✿◠‿◠) (ENBB), Friday, 17 August 2012 15:51 (twelve years ago)

I spent the last 24 hours researching this and I have come to the conclusion that you guys need to be funnier without the aid of Google Image search

frogbs, Friday, 17 August 2012 15:54 (twelve years ago)

lol

(✿◠‿◠) (ENBB), Friday, 17 August 2012 15:54 (twelve years ago)

xp you have versatile eyebrows

Aimless, Friday, 17 August 2012 15:55 (twelve years ago)

That is probably true tbh.

(✿◠‿◠) (ENBB), Friday, 17 August 2012 15:56 (twelve years ago)

feel like some dude is probably the best at making fun of me but I don't remember specific posts

Shameful Dead Half Choogle (Shakey Mo Collier), Friday, 17 August 2012 15:59 (twelve years ago)

i hope veggirl posts in this thread - let me find one for me. possibly the (now-deleted?) poll where i won most 'favo(u)rite rolling teenpop 2007 thread poster' w/ 3 votes (jaymc came in second w/ 2 votes) i'm pretty sure that wasn't intended as complimentary.

Mordy, Friday, 17 August 2012 16:03 (twelve years ago)

Mordy, I just came across that poll the other day and assumed it was complementary, because the people with the least votes were folks like kogan and thebug who really got a lot of grief about their teen-pop fandom.

how's life, Friday, 17 August 2012 16:27 (twelve years ago)

haha that's p good for the relentlessly secondrate horseshoe xox

― maxwell's silva hamartia (nakhchivan), Thursday, March 10, 2011 4:34 PM (1 year ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

horseshoe, Friday, 17 August 2012 16:28 (twelve years ago)

not exactly funny, i guess, but effective

horseshoe, Friday, 17 August 2012 16:30 (twelve years ago)

It's a bit hard to set any type of precedent re bad at this late date.

― Gorge, Saturday, May 17, 2008 2:37 PM (4 years ago)

Ówen P., Friday, 17 August 2012 16:33 (twelve years ago)

lol idk what that was about but it's not much of a 'slam'

Claude Parfait Ngon A Djam (nakhchivan), Friday, 17 August 2012 16:36 (twelve years ago)

i am chill w/ horseshoe tho

Claude Parfait Ngon A Djam (nakhchivan), Friday, 17 August 2012 16:37 (twelve years ago)

"it is a dirty world of non-aristos for u" - zvookster

boxall, Friday, 17 August 2012 16:38 (twelve years ago)

dan perry - do you seriously think i give a shit what any of you will says??

Lil Swayne of Pie (DJP), Friday, 17 August 2012 16:38 (twelve years ago)

runner-up is when contenderizer called me a puritan

Lil Swayne of Pie (DJP), Friday, 17 August 2012 16:39 (twelve years ago)

football players with unaccountably lengthy wikipedia articles

this is one i'm not sure about....i guess 'objectively' posting lots of bits of random crap from wikipedia on a plaintext message board is not an activity likely to engender respect from the world at large but i will continue to do it

Claude Parfait Ngon A Djam (nakhchivan), Friday, 17 August 2012 16:40 (twelve years ago)

zvookster's was much better, I saved you the trouble of finding it as well.

boxall, Friday, 17 August 2012 16:41 (twelve years ago)

nakh i think it was because i had said a mean thing to you but i was doing it in an over-the-top jokey way, but you understandably read it straight. it was my fault, at any rate.

horseshoe, Friday, 17 August 2012 16:44 (twelve years ago)

lol it was about the wire. you called the wire "p limited stuff" and i got mad and said:

also, you're p fucking limited stuff

― horseshoe, Thursday, March 10, 2011 4:32 PM (1 year ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

haha that's p good for the relentlessly secondrate horseshoe xox

― maxwell's silva hamartia (nakhchivan), Thursday, March 10, 2011 4:34 PM (1 year ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

horseshoe, Friday, 17 August 2012 16:45 (twelve years ago)

lol @ "p limited stuff"

reductio ad burzum (flopson), Friday, 17 August 2012 16:46 (twelve years ago)

I think k3vin's entry in this thread can be found in that Wire/Sopranos tangent as well.

boxall, Friday, 17 August 2012 16:47 (twelve years ago)

the point isn't that people do bad things, or that people sometimes don't care about other people, it's that the cumulative not-caring-about-other-people of a whole bunch of people over time creates systems and situations that are really difficult to turn around. like the wire is constantly making the "this person is acting as is basically required of him for the preservation of his job, and look how destructive it is, but look how difficult it would be for him to act differently" point about all kinds of different people with all kinds of different jobs, and the GIANT DICKENS/ZOLA SCOPE that can sometimes make the show seem shallow or didactic or less deep than the presumably-more-shakespearean sopranos is necessary to get the perspective the show needs to figure out how these people's jobs got this way.

― difficult listening hour, Thursday, 10 March 2011 21:20 (5 minutes ago)

this all true but it's p fucking limited stuff, there's a reason kids read dickens and nobody outside of france/college reads zola

― maxwell's silva hamartia (nakhchivan), Thursday, March 10, 2011 9:30 PM (1 year ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Claude Parfait Ngon A Djam (nakhchivan), Friday, 17 August 2012 16:47 (twelve years ago)

I feel like I've definitely incurred a funny slam or two (which I'm eternally receptive to), but most of the slams I remember have been disappointingly dickholish and humorless.

Old Lunch, Friday, 17 August 2012 16:48 (twelve years ago)

so i was referring to the dlh post, not the wire itself....which would make sense cuz i like the wire, but it was unkind to dlh

Claude Parfait Ngon A Djam (nakhchivan), Friday, 17 August 2012 16:49 (twelve years ago)

oh okay see i didn't even understand it the first time around! relentlessly secondrate!

horseshoe, Friday, 17 August 2012 16:49 (twelve years ago)

now i am mad @ u about dickens tho

horseshoe, Friday, 17 August 2012 16:50 (twelve years ago)

<3

horseshoe, Friday, 17 August 2012 16:50 (twelve years ago)

difficult listening hour is generally a v good poster who i have never seen upbraided for prolixity, despite having probably the highest avg word count this side of contenderizer, which reflects well on him and poorly on all the lazy 'contenderizer writes a lot' zings

Claude Parfait Ngon A Djam (nakhchivan), Friday, 17 August 2012 16:51 (twelve years ago)

i assume most ilxors, like i do, hang on dlh's every word

horseshoe, Friday, 17 August 2012 16:51 (twelve years ago)

xps really though, what horse actually needs or wants a first-rate horseshoe? i bet most horses actually prefer second-rate horseshoes. just sayin'.

turtwig greenturty (Matt P), Friday, 17 August 2012 16:51 (twelve years ago)

haha thanks for being so nice about what a baby i am

horseshoe, Friday, 17 August 2012 16:52 (twelve years ago)

lol, that's a particularly kinly interpretation, nakh, bless u

anyway, i get hardsonned all the time but can't remember the good ones :(

contenderizer, Friday, 17 August 2012 16:53 (twelve years ago)

r|t|c once called me "the ilm eunuch eclectic"

reductio ad burzum (flopson), Friday, 17 August 2012 16:55 (twelve years ago)

lol

Claude Parfait Ngon A Djam (nakhchivan), Friday, 17 August 2012 16:55 (twelve years ago)

the best one i remember was chaki calling me a saddo.

xp catchy

turtwig greenturty (Matt P), Friday, 17 August 2012 16:56 (twelve years ago)

ya it was p rad

reductio ad burzum (flopson), Friday, 17 August 2012 16:56 (twelve years ago)

afaict, r|t|c basically only posts about english football arcana and leftfield rnb &c and never shall the twain of those audiences meet

Claude Parfait Ngon A Djam (nakhchivan), Friday, 17 August 2012 16:58 (twelve years ago)

rtc is really good at this, also sort of terrifying

horseshoe, Friday, 17 August 2012 16:58 (twelve years ago)

lol otm, i'm a big fan

reductio ad burzum (flopson), Friday, 17 August 2012 17:00 (twelve years ago)

somewhat overdetermining the 'aristos' comment has suggested i was a moleskine owner and i had to look that up (a brand of precious notebooks apparently)

i looked at the og post but it's basically incomprehensible if u don't know what a clogger or a white van man or a graham dorrans is (some real big bottom bird britishness there)

Claude Parfait Ngon A Djam (nakhchivan), Friday, 17 August 2012 17:04 (twelve years ago)

r|t|c has suggested

Claude Parfait Ngon A Djam (nakhchivan), Friday, 17 August 2012 17:05 (twelve years ago)

No, you're just a dope who doesn't know cats as well as you think. But don't feel bad about it.

― Three Word Username, Monday, April 23, 2012 9:26 PM (3 months ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

And then shortly thereafter:

And you have no idea how much you feed your own cat, which makes you a valuable member of society.

― Three Word Username, Monday, April 23, 2012 9:40 PM (3 months ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

1) I use a measuring cup to scoop out my cats' food and feed them a very specific amount, so this is factually incorrect; and 2) LOL.

ms. cookie (carl agatha), Friday, 17 August 2012 17:07 (twelve years ago)

I don't know that those are "slams" but it's the closest anybody has ever come to on ILX to randomly singling me out for a little irrational anger. But I love the idea of someone being worthless to society for the sole reason that she doesn't know how much she feeds her cat.

ms. cookie (carl agatha), Friday, 17 August 2012 17:09 (twelve years ago)

i need some context on that slam. also i have no beef with Three Word Username afaik but he/she can gtfo for calling you a dope >:[

horseshoe, Friday, 17 August 2012 17:09 (twelve years ago)

Snoop Dogg has probably smoked more weed than anybody.

-- snoball, Sunday, 18 November 2007 15:03 (2 hours ago) Link

oh word

-- Wrinklepaws, Sunday, 18 November 2007 15:14 (2 hours ago) Link

no-one seemed to hear him so he leafed through a magazine (snoball), Friday, 17 August 2012 17:10 (twelve years ago)

THAT IS ONE OF THE RIGHT WING DICKS ALFRED SOTO.

― R.I.P. West Village Bird Shaman ]-`: (ex machina), Friday, March 24, 2006

a regina spektor is haunting europe (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Friday, 17 August 2012 17:11 (twelve years ago)

Oh, you card, snoball.

― Pleasant Plains, Wednesday, January 23, 2008 6:05 PM (4 years ago)

(it's the italics that make it)

no-one seemed to hear him so he leafed through a magazine (snoball), Friday, 17 August 2012 17:12 (twelve years ago)

In my mid-teens I wanted to be a stand up comedian, but I settled for being an unemployable loser instead.

-- snoball, Saturday, May 17, 2008 4:27 PM (2 days ago) Bookmark Link

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

you made the correct choice

― sunny successor, Monday, May 19, 2008 3:56 PM (4 years ago)

no-one seemed to hear him so he leafed through a magazine (snoball), Friday, 17 August 2012 17:13 (twelve years ago)

horseshoe: I said something about liking fat cats. TWU posted that all fat cats are miserable and sad and doomed to die. I said that was nonsense.

ms. cookie (carl agatha), Friday, 17 August 2012 17:14 (twelve years ago)

oh for god's sake

horseshoe, Friday, 17 August 2012 17:14 (twelve years ago)

ikr

ms. cookie (carl agatha), Friday, 17 August 2012 17:14 (twelve years ago)

fuck fat cats

Mr. Que, Friday, 17 August 2012 17:14 (twelve years ago)

THANKS SNOBALL

― G00blar, Saturday, May 24, 2008 9:38 PM (4 years ago)

(capital letters are more sarcastic)

no-one seemed to hear him so he leafed through a magazine (snoball), Friday, 17 August 2012 17:15 (twelve years ago)

NB <3 horseshoe but will never forgive dickens for not editing to half the size once the things were published as novels and he wasn't getting paid by the page

Claude Parfait Ngon A Djam (nakhchivan), Friday, 17 August 2012 17:16 (twelve years ago)

I want Jeff to post the one where VegemiteGrrl called him a clip show.

ms. cookie (carl agatha), Friday, 17 August 2012 17:16 (twelve years ago)

he wasn't getting paid by the page

― Claude Parfait Ngon A Djam (nakhchivan), Friday, August 17, 2012 1:16 PM (19 seconds ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

this is a canard and u are better than it!!!

horseshoe, Friday, 17 August 2012 17:17 (twelve years ago)

oh c'mon horseshoe

Mr. Que, Friday, 17 August 2012 17:17 (twelve years ago)

well why were they so long!

Claude Parfait Ngon A Djam (nakhchivan), Friday, 17 August 2012 17:17 (twelve years ago)

ok maybe a dickens book isn't so long once u have read the man without qualities but at 14/15 they were a damn chore at school

Claude Parfait Ngon A Djam (nakhchivan), Friday, 17 August 2012 17:18 (twelve years ago)

Snoop Dogg has probably smoked more weed than anybody.

-- snoball, Sunday, 18 November 2007 15:03 (2 hours ago) Link

oh word

-- Wrinklepaws, Sunday, 18 November 2007 15:14 (2 hours ago) Link

― no-one seemed to hear him so he leafed through a magazine (snoball), Friday, August 17, 2012 10:10 AM (3 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

turtwig greenturty (Matt P), Friday, 17 August 2012 17:18 (twelve years ago)

so funny

turtwig greenturty (Matt P), Friday, 17 August 2012 17:19 (twelve years ago)

Nakh!

(✿◠‿◠) (ENBB), Friday, 17 August 2012 17:20 (twelve years ago)

hello :)

(✿◠‿◠) (ENBB), Friday, 17 August 2012 17:20 (twelve years ago)

i mean it's technically true that he got paid by the installment but whatever! i get sick of that being used to dismiss his work. do you think the dvd collection of the sopranos or whichever tv show meets with your approval should cut out the middle 10 episodes of each season? in conclusion, you come on, Mr. Que!

horseshoe, Friday, 17 August 2012 17:20 (twelve years ago)

i love things to happen in installments tbf i wish all the dickens novels never ended and we could all cheat death etc.

horseshoe, Friday, 17 August 2012 17:21 (twelve years ago)

so just the 2 most vocal and frequent posters supporting that opinion aren't native English speakers. maybe you guys are giving your crew a bad name tbh.

― oh boy, luriqua's house! that's where M.I.A.'s dyking! (some dude), Friday, April 30, 2010 10:27 AM (2 years ago) Bookmark

p hilarie in retrospect

kanye shiwen (dayo), Friday, 17 August 2012 17:27 (twelve years ago)

oh i don't think it reflects badly on him that he got paid, i respect getting paid, but i prefer the sopranos' 'hey look another fat guido got out of jail this season who knew' version of padding than the dickens 'kindly rachitic olde mrs crumplegrough tends to her cottage garden of misbegotten marrows' dickensian version of padding

Claude Parfait Ngon A Djam (nakhchivan), Friday, 17 August 2012 17:27 (twelve years ago)

haha

horseshoe, Friday, 17 August 2012 17:28 (twelve years ago)

fair but have you read david copperfield? i mean, i wish that one were even longer somehow.

horseshoe, Friday, 17 August 2012 17:29 (twelve years ago)

uggggggggggggggggggggggggggggh David Copperfield goes on forever

Mr. Que, Friday, 17 August 2012 17:30 (twelve years ago)

i wish

horseshoe, Friday, 17 August 2012 17:31 (twelve years ago)

I haven't been able to find anything really funny, but there was one point in 2010 or 2011 when Matt P. said something mean to me. I can't remember it specifically or find it, but it was just a quick one-off like "you really are the worst person on ilx" or something. I had never even noticed Matt P. as a poster up to that point and thought it was totally hilarious that I was being called out by some guy I had never heard of.

how's life, Friday, 17 August 2012 17:38 (twelve years ago)

"Anyway, if I really like a song it's because I think it's a really good one, and people who don't are just mistaken. I don't think anyone should experience guilt or shame for liking a song unless it's one by Creed, so Mr. Michael Bourke you can just fuck on off."

not really funny i guess

Michael B Higgins (Michael B), Friday, 17 August 2012 17:51 (twelve years ago)

this one was really good, and it was the only award i won fairly and squarely in 2011 <3

now jon i know you think 'sort of skim this thread' but here is a lesson in reading comprehension 4 u - the first usage of 'countries be growin' is by my mans drugs a money, who was bless his heart generally defending me, except that hes not thrilled w/my countries be growin response which im taking to mean he thinks my treatment of the importance of the mexican economy was somewhat dismissive in the context of all the violence, like i was saying 'its ndb dudes the economy is growin' which of course i was not at all saying - then you can see he asks la lechera, winner of the 2011 thread scold award, if she thinks hes being flippant to which she replies 'nonono' - now if she were doing the exact opposite of endorsing the quote this wouldve been a good time to mention that she thought the quote was in fact, flippant, which it is, but instead she said no three times which does to me make her subsequent quoting of it look a lot more like an endorsement, particularly since its in line w/her general sentiment in this thread, which is that peoples opinions on this topic that are not her own are frivolous

― ice cr?m, Monday, October 3, 2011 2:37 PM (10 months ago) Bookmark

these albatrosses have no fear of man (La Lechera), Friday, 17 August 2012 18:19 (twelve years ago)

flippant

these albatrosses have no fear of man (La Lechera), Friday, 17 August 2012 18:20 (twelve years ago)

Curt1s Stephens wrote this on thread Resource for meme early adopters on board I Rate Everything on Apr 12, 2008

1. djmartian
2. DJ Mencap
∞. deej

it's-a me, irl (DJ Mencap), Friday, 17 August 2012 18:26 (twelve years ago)

^^^ irl lols @ this

― Janet Snakehole (VegemiteGrrl), Wednesday, February 22, 2012 7:20 PM (1 month ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

A+

― Janet Snakehole (VegemiteGrrl), Thursday, February 23, 2012 11:49 AM (1 month ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

:D

― Janet Snakehole (VegemiteGrrl), Thursday, February 23, 2012 1:37 PM (1 month ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

lol

― Janet Snakehole (VegemiteGrrl), Friday, February 24, 2012 9:35 AM (1 month ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

this...I love it.

aerosmith = hero

― Peppermint Patty Hearst (VegemiteGrrl), Tuesday, February 28, 2012 11:44 AM (1 month ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

dying over here

― Peppermint Patty Hearst (VegemiteGrrl), Wednesday, February 29, 2012 4:26 PM (1 month ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

beautiful

― Peppermint Patty Hearst (VegemiteGrrl), Thursday, March 1, 2012 10:23 AM (1 month ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

hahah

― Peppermint Patty Hearst (VegemiteGrrl), Monday, March 5, 2012 12:41 PM (1 month ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

hooooly shit

― Peppermint Patty Hearst (VegemiteGrrl), Thursday, March 8, 2012 1:31 PM (1 month ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

lol

― Peppermint Patty Hearst (VegemiteGrrl), Saturday, March 10, 2012 12:30 AM (4 weeks ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

<3

― Peppermint Patty Hearst (VegemiteGrrl), Saturday, March 10, 2012 9:52 PM (4 weeks ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

<3 this

― Peppermint Patty Hearst (VegemiteGrrl), Tuesday, March 13, 2012 1:33 PM (3 weeks ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

lol

― Peppermint Patty Hearst (VegemiteGrrl), Tuesday, March 13, 2012 4:35 PM (3 weeks ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

<3

― Peppermint Patty Hearst (VegemiteGrrl), Tuesday, March 13, 2012 7:41 PM (3 weeks ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

hahahah dying

― Peppermint Patty Hearst (VegemiteGrrl), Tuesday, March 13, 2012 9:57 PM (3 weeks ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

tis a beauty

― Peppermint Patty Hearst (VegemiteGrrl), Wednesday, March 14, 2012 12:31 AM (3 weeks ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

haha

― Peppermint Patty Hearst (VegemiteGrrl), Thursday, March 15, 2012 11:34 AM (3 weeks ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

awesome

― Peppermint Patty Hearst (VegemiteGrrl), Thursday, March 15, 2012 3:33 PM (3 weeks ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

aww

― Peppermint Patty Hearst (VegemiteGrrl), Thursday, March 15, 2012 9:56 PM (3 weeks ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

looool

― Peppermint Patty Hearst (VegemiteGrrl), Tuesday, March 20, 2012 6:18 PM (2 weeks ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

yaaaay

― Peppermint Patty Hearst (VegemiteGrrl), Wednesday, March 21, 2012 6:05 PM (2 weeks ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

<3

― Peppermint Patty Hearst (VegemiteGrrl), Friday, March 23, 2012 2:28 PM (2 weeks ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

haha

― Peppermint Patty Hearst (VegemiteGrrl), Tuesday, March 27, 2012 7:33 PM (1 week ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

brilliant

― Peppermint Patty Hearst (VegemiteGrrl), Friday, March 30, 2012 11:27 AM (1 week ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

hee hee

― Peppermint Patty Hearst (VegemiteGrrl), Monday, April 2, 2012 12:46 PM (1 week ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

hahah

― Peppermint Patty Hearst (VegemiteGrrl), Monday, April 2, 2012 1:14 PM (1 week ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

hahaha

― Peppermint Patty Hearst (VegemiteGrrl), Tuesday, April 3, 2012 11:30 AM (6 days ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

cat otm

― Peppermint Patty Hearst (VegemiteGrrl), Tuesday, April 3, 2012 3:29 PM (6 days ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

lol

― Peppermint Patty Hearst (VegemiteGrrl), Thursday, April 5, 2012 10:53 PM (4 days ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

omg

― Peppermint Patty Hearst (VegemiteGrrl), Saturday, April 7, 2012 1:04 PM (2 days ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

*applause*

― Peppermint Patty Hearst (VegemiteGrrl), Saturday, April 7, 2012 2:23 PM (2 days ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

hall of fame, right there

― Peppermint Patty Hearst (VegemiteGrrl), Monday, April 9, 2012 5:04 PM (29 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

exacting standards of the hall of fame committee ;)

― lag∞n, Monday, April 9, 2012 2:42 PM (4 months ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Admittedly I was mortified at the time but this was p awesome

set the controls for the heart of the sun (VegemiteGrrl), Friday, 17 August 2012 18:34 (twelve years ago)

ah catalog zings

turtwig greenturty (Matt P), Friday, 17 August 2012 18:55 (twelve years ago)

so much copying and pasting

turtwig greenturty (Matt P), Friday, 17 August 2012 18:55 (twelve years ago)

underrated level of committment to making such a zing, imo

set the controls for the heart of the sun (VegemiteGrrl), Friday, 17 August 2012 18:57 (twelve years ago)

rtc is really good at this, also sort of terrifying

― horseshoe, Friday, August 17, 2012 11:58 AM (1 hour ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

i know, he zung me something fierce once in bygone days but i'll never find it now

goole, Friday, 17 August 2012 18:58 (twelve years ago)

it's meditative iirc xp

turtwig greenturty (Matt P), Friday, 17 August 2012 18:58 (twelve years ago)

"zung"

set the controls for the heart of the sun (VegemiteGrrl), Friday, 17 August 2012 18:59 (twelve years ago)

hahaha that ice cream one

reductio ad burzum (flopson), Friday, 17 August 2012 18:59 (twelve years ago)

rtc is really good at this, also sort of terrifying

― horseshoe, Friday, August 17, 2012 11:58 AM (1 hour ago)

i know, he zung me something fierce once in bygone days but i'll never find it now

― goole, Friday, August 17, 2012 11:58 AM (5 seconds ago)


same here, and more than once. not the best, but the most recent:
"pilot jones" and "crack rock" remind me of sly stone circa riot, same kind of blurry, detached sadness and beauty, like it's too painful to lift a finger, but the memory of happier times keeps bleeding through. not a sound/vibe i encounter much in contemporary music. kills me.

― contenderizer, Thursday, July 19, 2012 12:46 AM (6 hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

if only

― r|t|c, Thursday, July 19, 2012 7:05 AM (51 seconds ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

contenderizer, Friday, 17 August 2012 19:03 (twelve years ago)

+2 hipster points to sarahel for casually dropping that she lives in a poorer neighborhood

― Whiney G. Weingarten, Tuesday, October 25, 2011 11:34 AM (9 months ago)

sarahell, Friday, 17 August 2012 19:14 (twelve years ago)

going through zing thread. another good one:

Part 3...

[insanely long post about chromatics album goes here]

― yuppie bullshit chocolate blogbait (contenderizer), Monday, April 23, 2012 2:53 PM

could you elaborate

― Deverly (Bangelo), Monday, April 23, 2012 3:02 PM

contenderizer, Friday, 17 August 2012 19:19 (twelve years ago)

it's just that i can easily imagine Whiney keeping a running tabulation of everyone's hipster points

sarahell, Friday, 17 August 2012 19:29 (twelve years ago)

thanks for explaining

Mr. Que, Friday, 17 August 2012 19:32 (twelve years ago)

http://www.inquisitr.com/wp-content/2011/09/heidi-the-cross-eyed-opossum.jpg

pictured: Mr. Que

sarahell, Friday, 17 August 2012 19:37 (twelve years ago)

thanks for revealing to the world what i look like

Mr. Que, Friday, 17 August 2012 19:44 (twelve years ago)

you only look like that when reading my posts

sarahell, Friday, 17 August 2012 19:47 (twelve years ago)

what do other people look like when reading your posts

Mr. Que, Friday, 17 August 2012 19:53 (twelve years ago)

Mr. Que, you are adorable. please live with me.

Porto for Pyros (The Cursed Return of the Dastardly Thermo Thinwall), Friday, 17 August 2012 19:53 (twelve years ago)

Post the Best Thing Another ILXer has said about you

Mr. Que, Friday, 17 August 2012 19:55 (twelve years ago)

I've been slammed plenty but I don't recall anything more than chuckleworthy but then...

Pape de père en fils; pornocracie (Michael White), Friday, 17 August 2012 19:56 (twelve years ago)

I will leave it to others to decide which were their best zings against me and post them here. I am too senile to recall them on my own.

Aimless, Friday, 17 August 2012 19:58 (twelve years ago)

Michael White has been called... "a rolling barrel of man-bosoms, a mass of microbial uncleanliness, a simpering pollution on the face of god, and a spineless, faceless, piss-toping, untemperate nitwit."

Never forget.

Aimless, Friday, 17 August 2012 20:02 (twelve years ago)

It felt like a weird unexplained hole.

― Choogle Image Search (Tarfumes The Escape Goat), Tuesday, August 14, 2012 2:00 PM (6 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

you feel like a weird unexplained hole

― Author ~ Coach ~ Goddess (s1ocki), Tuesday, August 14, 2012 2:03 PM (3 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Choogle Image Search (Tarfumes The Escape Goat), Friday, 17 August 2012 20:05 (twelve years ago)

Casting Call for ILX: THE MOVIE

omar little, Friday, 17 August 2012 20:19 (twelve years ago)

Never forget

That's merely descriptive, though

ça GLIS aux pays de merveilles; châteaux de loirs (Michael White), Friday, 17 August 2012 20:22 (twelve years ago)

I'm in not un -temperate, though

ça GLIS aux pays de merveilles; châteaux de loirs (Michael White), Friday, 17 August 2012 20:23 (twelve years ago)

I'm pretty sure Calum called me something heartwarming at some point.

ça GLIS aux pays de merveilles; châteaux de loirs (Michael White), Friday, 17 August 2012 20:23 (twelve years ago)

still sad I wasn't cast in that movie

a regina spektor is haunting europe (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Friday, 17 August 2012 20:27 (twelve years ago)

omg omar you do not look like bob balaban but I lol'd

(✿◠‿◠) (ENBB), Friday, 17 August 2012 20:29 (twelve years ago)

I was just reading the Breaking Bad thread -- I'm only caught up through S4 E1, so no spoilers! -- and had to lol at this:

Written by David Segal, hm - I wonder if that's the same Dave Segal who used to post on ILM (and cheerfully threatened to murder my entire family)?

― Myonga Vön Bontee, Tuesday, July 12, 2011 12:43 PM (1 year ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Haha, I remember that! I believe I said something nasty about Echo & the Bunnymen and he took offense. Later I grew to kinda like them (and not just for self-preservation)

aerosmith suck because their corporate rock that sucks (Myonga Vön Bontee), Friday, 17 August 2012 20:33 (twelve years ago)

Idk if ive ever been slammed on ilx :-(

the mandy moorhols (Stevie D(eux)), Tuesday, 21 August 2012 22:26 (twelve years ago)

in my first week or two ethan said i had a "very metallic ass."

in time we became friends.

Know how Roo feel (LocalGarda), Tuesday, 21 August 2012 22:35 (twelve years ago)

tho i was always self conscious when polishing myself from there on out

Know how Roo feel (LocalGarda), Tuesday, 21 August 2012 22:35 (twelve years ago)

Being called a "frat-house/school playground bully" was funny but I don't even know who to thank since it was back in the day when people could still post anon.

NR’s resident heavy-metal expert (Nicole), Tuesday, 21 August 2012 22:49 (twelve years ago)

it was me, nicole. it's been nagging at me for years.

Know how Roo feel (LocalGarda), Tuesday, 21 August 2012 22:50 (twelve years ago)

it wasn't

Know how Roo feel (LocalGarda), Tuesday, 21 August 2012 22:50 (twelve years ago)

I still feel like I should now bully you in some way.

NR’s resident heavy-metal expert (Nicole), Tuesday, 21 August 2012 22:51 (twelve years ago)

this is only one i can remember. pretty polite though.

At the risk of getting on his shit-list, I want to register my disgust with the opening of Scott Seward's Marah review. I'm not interested in defending Nick Hornby or Marah, but I don't think this level of insult, which I don't even find humorous--more like a bad day on ILM, belongs in even a weekly's music section.
― Rockist Scientist, Tuesday, June 29, 2004 10:55 PM (8 years ago)

scott seward, Tuesday, 21 August 2012 23:26 (twelve years ago)

plus, it was worth it just for the thread title:

"Nick Hornby is full of shit. Actually, this is unfair to shit. At least life grows from shit." WTF?

scott seward, Tuesday, 21 August 2012 23:27 (twelve years ago)

go to hell, troll bitch from jersey.
― Orbit (Orbit), Friday, January 30, 2004 8:53 PM (8 years ago)

ezra kleine nachtmusik (get bent), Tuesday, 21 August 2012 23:38 (twelve years ago)

Troll bitch from jersey would be such a great name for a song.

NR’s resident heavy-metal expert (Nicole), Tuesday, 21 August 2012 23:51 (twelve years ago)

i googled "troll bitch from jersey" and the only other thing to come up was a dlisted post about jersey shore.

ezra kleine nachtmusik (get bent), Tuesday, 21 August 2012 23:55 (twelve years ago)

i figure there have to be some good ones out there but right now all i can think of is that thread where some guy said he was "making cards" for me, blount, and ethan.

big-mammed punisher (strongo hulkington's ghost dad), Wednesday, 22 August 2012 00:25 (twelve years ago)

how would we rank terius' singles as lead artist, then?

was going to put this on al's poll thread but thought he might not appreciate yet more terius talk there, and there aren't really enough to merit a thread of their own. thought it might be interesting though as terius' singles don't tend to be the most talked-about of his songs, and are def his most "generic"...anyway i go:

my love
shawty is da shit
sweat it out
i luv your girl
rockin' that shit
let me see the booty
walkin' on the moon
make-up bag
love king
falsetto

― lex lex lex lex lex on the track BOW (lex pretend), Tuesday, November 9, 2010 12:28 PM (1 year ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

falsetto
rockin that shit
sweat it out
shawty is da shit
i luv ur girl
my love
make-up bag
let me see the booty
love king
walkin' on the moon

― s&m: sex and masturbating (The Brainwasher), Tuesday, November 9, 2010 12:31 PM (1 year ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

rockin' that shit
shawty is da shit
sweat it out
love king
walkin' on the moon
i luv your girl
my love
let me see the booty
make-up bag
falsetto

― deej otm (some dude), Tuesday, November 9, 2010 12:40 PM (1 year ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

i also suspected all of our lists would be completely different

well, so far "sweat it out" has a consensus bronze medal

― lex lex lex lex lex on the track BOW (lex pretend), Tuesday, November 9, 2010 12:50 PM (1 year ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

makes a kind of sense -- it's obviously great but chartwise a very minor hit that didn't have a video so noone feels quite right about putting it in first or second place

― deej otm (some dude), Tuesday, November 9, 2010 1:01 PM (1 year ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

lex i love you but saying "my love" is the best terius single is just

― wakafledia (k3vin k.), Tuesday, November 9, 2010 1:52 PM (1 year ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

shawty is da shit
falsetto
i luv your girl
sweat it out
my love
rockin that shit
let me see the booty
love king
walkin' on the moon
make-up bag

― J0rdan S., Tuesday, November 9, 2010 1:53 PM (1 year ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

anyway i'll rank these as singles and not necessarily as songs or parts of albums

"shawty is da shit!" > "rockin that shit" > "sweat it out" > "falsetto" >>> "love king" > "i luv your girl" = "my love" = "walkin on the moon" >> "make up bag"

― wakafledia (k3vin k.), Tuesday, November 9, 2010 1:57 PM (1 year ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

altho i feel reasonably comfortable saying "shawty is da shit!" is his my favorite song of his

― wakafledia (k3vin k.), Tuesday, November 9, 2010 1:58 PM (1 year ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

i don't think i'd ever have guessed that "my love" would become my fav terius single at the time, but it actually inspired this bump - it's probably the dream song-in-isolation i drift back to most regularly, i kind of feel i know every nook and cranny of it by heart

― lex lex lex lex lex on the track BOW (lex pretend), Tuesday, November 9, 2010 2:06 PM (1 year ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

shawty is da shit
i luv your girl
sweat it out
falsetto
rockin' that shit
walkin' on the moon
make-up bag
my love
love king
let me see the booty

― sister soulja boy (The Reverend), Tuesday, November 9, 2010 3:31 PM (1 year ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

shawty is da shit
rockin' that shit
falsetto
sweat it out
my love
i luv your girl
make-up bag
let me see the booty
love king
walkin' on the moon

― Tim F, Tuesday, November 9, 2010 3:42 PM (1 year ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

seriously how do you crazy bastards keep having this discussion!!

http://imgur.com/VCmNa.gif

― r|t|c, Tuesday, November 9, 2010 3:51 PM (1 year ago)

mellow, groovy, chilled out, cool (k3vin k.), Wednesday, 22 August 2012 00:43 (twelve years ago)

not an rtc zing but a subtle admonishment borne of disappointment that has stuck with me

mellow, groovy, chilled out, cool (k3vin k.), Wednesday, 22 August 2012 00:45 (twelve years ago)

I shd create an email poll for this huh

rtc's best zing was mebbe his alltimer on soto

once a week is ample, Wednesday, 22 August 2012 10:06 (twelve years ago)

im imagining a sitcom where 3 men find themselves in weird situations and they have to work out how to get themselves out.

episode one: pinefox, the lex and tuomas are in a sticky situation when they find themselves in somebodys garden and there is a loud barking coming from behind them. a garden gate separates them from freedom, will they make it out in time?

― 600, 15. huhtikuuta 2007 15:05 Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

the lex falls to the ground as he valiantly tries to climb the hedge, tuomas sticks his head into the hedge, pinefox muses on the nature of the gate

― 600, 15. huhtikuuta 2007 15:06 Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

episode two: pinefox, the lex and tuomas find themselves in a boat in the middle of a pond near the village green. there is a hole in the bottom of the boat and there is a strange wooden shaped thing floating nearby.

the lex wants to grab the strange wooden thing and wave it in the air, in the hope of attracting attention. tuomas remarks that back in finland the boats dont have holes, why do they have holes in them here? the pinefox can't remember who the lex and tuomas are

― 600, 15. huhtikuuta 2007 15:10 Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

episode three. after a difficult day trying to get the key to work in the lock of their house, tuomas, the lex and pinefox settle down and relax in their lounge. tuomas is confused that there are strange obstacles between all the rooms and back in finland ease of movement between the rooms isn't so restricted. the pinefox is concerned by some strange lights and nasty noises coming from a black box in the corner of the room and has covered it with a blanket, and the lex has fallen into the sink

― 600, 15. huhtikuuta 2007 15:17 Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

tuomas, the lex and pinefox find themselves trapped by the side of the road. their favourite kebab house is on the other side. pinefox wants to call michael jones for advice but the lexs ipod doesn't seem to have any reception. tuomas wants to walk across the road but the lex is worried the big colorful things might hurt like the lamppost did earlier in the day. tuomas says it is ridiculuous to assume that the machines are violent and that in Finland many of those machines are used to host anti-patriarchy meetings on the campus.

tuomas walks calmly into the road and a blue machine hits him and he falls to the ground. the lex finds this hilarious and shouts "SEE! you do that too, i'm not the only one!" and, reassured, stumbles into the road, and is hit by a red machine and exclaims loudly "OW OW OW no fair you got the blue one tuomas the red one HURTS".

the pinefox looks at the two vaguely recognisable people lying in the road and wonders when the lex and tuomas are going to return with the *kebabs*, whatever the hell they are

― 600, 18. huhtikuuta 2007 12:48 Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Tuomas, Wednesday, 22 August 2012 10:38 (twelve years ago)

that's quite magnificent

Number None, Wednesday, 22 August 2012 10:40 (twelve years ago)

is gareth still around? miss that dude

Lil Swayne of Pie (DJP), Wednesday, 22 August 2012 12:09 (twelve years ago)

his ids are not as difficult to see past than you'd think.

Know how Roo feel (LocalGarda), Wednesday, 22 August 2012 12:23 (twelve years ago)

as you'd think, even.

Know how Roo feel (LocalGarda), Wednesday, 22 August 2012 12:23 (twelve years ago)

No doubt but I am terrible at the "guess the poster" game do I rarely try

Lil Swayne of Pie (DJP), Wednesday, 22 August 2012 13:04 (twelve years ago)

Er, so

Lil Swayne of Pie (DJP), Wednesday, 22 August 2012 13:05 (twelve years ago)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8rLM7kZIcps

Nilmar Honorato da Silva, Wednesday, 22 August 2012 13:09 (twelve years ago)

you are 100% bitch, some dude

― cankles, Wednesday, December 17, 2008 3:08 PM (3 years ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

one of the worst posters ever

― cankles, Wednesday, December 17, 2008 3:08 PM (3 years ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

some dude, Wednesday, 22 August 2012 13:15 (twelve years ago)

so just the 2 most vocal and frequent posters supporting that opinion aren't native English speakers. maybe you guys are giving your crew a bad name tbh.

― oh boy, luriqua's house! that's where M.I.A.'s dyking! (some dude), Friday, April 30, 2010 10:27 AM (2 years ago) Bookmark

p hilarie in retrospect

― kanye shiwen (dayo), Friday, August 17, 2012 1:27 PM (5 days ago) Bookmark

if you mean cause i give goons a bad name surely that damage was done well before 2 years ago!

some dude, Wednesday, 22 August 2012 13:17 (twelve years ago)

you're a fucking dick, Edward III.

― GOTT PUNCH II HAWKWINDZ, Wednesday, June 25, 2008 11:57 PM (4 years ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Seconded.

― Raw Patrick, Thursday, June 26, 2008 3:55 AM (4 years ago)

vincent black shadow giallo (Edward III), Wednesday, 22 August 2012 21:23 (twelve years ago)

100-way tie between all the times Steve Shasta insisted on calling me polyp.

pun lovin criminal (polyphonic), Wednesday, 22 August 2012 21:28 (twelve years ago)

aw

set the controls for the heart of the sun (VegemiteGrrl), Wednesday, 22 August 2012 21:29 (twelve years ago)

i'm sure i've got some winners on file but outside of the only one that became a meme i can't really remember?

"Batshit crazy," the foam clog tycoon said. (forksclovetofu), Wednesday, 22 August 2012 21:57 (twelve years ago)

seven years pass...

mr. snrub you are a motherfucking idiot. with every post you make i believe this more and more.
― Jams Murphy (ystrickler), Tuesday, January 4, 2005 4:01 PM (5 years ago) Bookmark

― Mr. Snrub, Friday, August 17, 2012 10:40 AM (seven years ago) bookmarkflaglink

This is especially funny now that the ILXor in question has published a book subtitled "A Manifesto for a More Generous World."

jaymc, Tuesday, 21 January 2020 05:06 (five years ago)

The funniest slam I ever got was when I had been a member for like two months and started a mad men season 4 thread without finding one that had already started and lagoon got mad and imagebombed my thread

Swilling Ambergris, Esq. (silby), Tuesday, 21 January 2020 05:16 (five years ago)

someone...either lagoon or sic ...did a retrospective of every lol i ever uttered... i was mortified but in retrospect it was v funny

terminators of endearment (VegemiteGrrl), Tuesday, 21 January 2020 05:58 (five years ago)

otm

Swilling Ambergris, Esq. (silby), Tuesday, 21 January 2020 06:27 (five years ago)

https://66.media.tumblr.com/9b761fddbdc620c3b671fe657b2d8973/tumblr_mkr0fwAvNM1ru09vqo1_500.gif

The Squalls Of Hate (sleeve), Tuesday, 21 January 2020 06:33 (five years ago)

I don't post enough to get slammed often, only one I can remember is cankles calling me a cumlord after I correctly stated Five Guys doesn't have veggie burgers

Vinnie, Tuesday, 21 January 2020 06:42 (five years ago)

To quote VegemiteGrrl, “lol”

Swilling Ambergris, Esq. (silby), Tuesday, 21 January 2020 06:43 (five years ago)

I would think cumlord would be a compliment

ingredience (map), Tuesday, 21 January 2020 06:52 (five years ago)

It wasn't about what they said, it was the way they said it

Vinnie, Tuesday, 21 January 2020 07:06 (five years ago)


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