Battle of the Chain Pizzas

was actually just talking about this w/ a friend this week, but i feel compelled to never eat at papa john's ever again in my life even tho it's by far the best of these

gonna vote godfather's for the lulz tho

ANYONE WHO VOTES FOR CPK, I SWEAR TO GOD I WILL HUNT YOU DOWN AND SLAY YOU IN FRONT OF ALL OF YOUR LOVED ONES, THEN PUT YOUR QUIVERING REMAINS ON A CPK PIZZA

pizza hut overseas

papa john's is the best tho that's not saying much.

Happy Joe's doesn't really belong but the kids I used to work with it loved the shit out of it so Happy Joe's haters get a side of dick with their substandard pizza

forreal tho - if youre gonna eat at pizza hut you might as well make it a spectacle. so go to a pizza hut in china, hong kong, korea, or abu dhabi

i think pizza hut is actually the worst of these bcuz it tastes like you're eating a pillow with cheese on it

if i'm eating shitty pizza i'd rather it be as close to nonexistent as possible

in Cambridge UK, I once ordered a supreme pizza at Pizza Hut and received a pizza with kernels of corn on it

I didn't realize it then but this was the beginning of the end of my love affair with Pizza Hut

in Cambridge UK, I once ordered a supreme pizza at Pizza Hut and received a pizza with kernels of corn on it

this anecdote has gone a long way to explaining the culinary habits of l0u1s jagg3r

repping for Papa John's over Round Table or Pizza Hut is disgusting savagery btw

xp I almost included the one national Thai chain but tbh I have no idea if their pizza is any good.

xxp tragic pizzas in small English towns are their own series of pamphlets I'll someday publish

the worst is little caesar's. straight up garbage.

i still think we should all go to chuck e. cheese

they have beer ffs

little ceasar's crazy bread is on point tho

I'm unfamiliar with at least half of these. I wouldn't even know about Godfather's Pizza if it wasn't for Herman Cain. If Chuck E. Cheese still has Centipede and ski ball they're getting my vote.

man, papa john's is the worst. little caeser's at least seems refreshingly comfortable with their awfulness (don't they always have like $1 pizza specials, or is that domino's?).

wtf is round table?

come on who wants in on this with me I'll buy

http://i.imgur.com/7myga.jpg

i still think we should all go to chuck e. cheese

― THAT IS ONE BIG PIZZA (strongo hulkington's ghost dad), Monday, November 26, 2012 3:33 PM (2 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

I took some of the kids I used to work with and their kids to Chuck E. Cheese a couple years ago and it was hands down the worst fucking pizza I've ever had ever.

round table is a west coast thing. i've never been. never been to cici's pizza buffet either.

uh the point of going to chuck e. cheese is not the pizza

cici's is nasty but also kid of fun bcuz BUFFET

http://i.imgur.com/ICLE9.jpg

the point is getting ripped on chuck e. beer and playing the shit out of skeeball iirc

Round Table is probably the best of these, or was in the 80s. I think Strongo is otm though. Let's smoke some fuckin weed and go to Chuck's

i "liked" the all-you-can-eat pizza restaurant in rio de janeiro. they just brought around various pies and gave you tiny slices of whatever you wanted, including dessert pizza. the pizza wasn't very good but there was so much of it!

Godfather's takes this, and I didn't even remember the heelarious Cainnection until my vote had been cast. Godfather's pizzasauce has a dark, complex bouquet. I suspect they put red wine in it. Props to them for this and for putting ample cheese on their pies. And they never advertise much either, which I appreciate. They're just always there, quietly making the superior chain pizza.

Pizza Hut

can we get Shakey's pizza delivered to Chuck E Cheese, because then win-win

Domino's - got into countless arguments w/ roommate in college over this (him: 'let's get domino's, it's only $5' me: 'I will eat any pizza in this city that isn't domino's'). lingering resentment.
Papa John's - tastes like donuts, awful
Pizza Hut - my parents never let us have this cause they were convinced it was worse than other fast food, I think I have had it like once in an airport
Little Caesar's - fond childhood memories, I saw one recently and was surprised they still existed
Numero Uno - no idea
Pizza Inn - this sounds like a fake chain you'd see on a cartoon
California Pizza Kitchen - hate this place so much. symbolic of all the bad aspects of california, this is the reagan of pizza.
Round Table - vaguely remember having it
Sbarro - yeah sure why not, I'd take this over anything else here
Shakey's - never heard of
Happy Joe's - never heard of
Home Run Inn - never heard of
Godfather's - never heard of before cain
Chuck E. Cheese's - vague childhood memories
CiCi's - never heard of

i had my 21st birthday at chuck e. cheese. yes, they serve alcohol.

― jess, Monday, May 13, 2002

i'd do it again, too.

cici's pizza buffet easily wins best name of all of these, tho i've never eaten there or heard of it before this poll

Godfather's is good too actually

also can I just

http://i.imgur.com/sdaXc.jpg

tbh i don't hate cpk, i just don't consider it real pizza. as california chains go, sammy's woodfired pizza is far superior.

did pizza hut change their recipe at some point in the '90s? i loved it when i was a kid (i suspect BOOK IT! had something to do with it) and then when i ate it again as an adult i was like "the fuck is this garbage". probably it's just mozzarella-colored glasses tho

I don't think I've ever actually had CPK pizza. I mean I've only been there a couple of times but I think I had salad each time.

BOOK IT!

so Pizza Inn is still a thing? i know i must have eaten there as a child, but i cant recall seeing one in years

i suspect BOOK IT! had a lot to do with my girth as a child

CPK PIZZA IS ACTUALLY A PRANK ORCHESTRATED BY SATAN

i had a salad last time i was at a cpk (at an airport).

and I've only had pizza hut 2x in my life -

Went with Domino's which served me well during many a late drunken night in the wilds of rural upstate NY.

This thread needs Vocelli's, if it's going to have shit like Happy Joe's on it.

i enjoy cold next-day domino's, maybe moreso than when it's warm and you just ordered it

there are very few restaurants I categorically refuse to go to under any circumstance but CPK is at the top of that list

(narrowly beating out Denny's)

pizza huts were kind of swingin when i was little iirc. they had pac man machines that were tables and they served beer(?)

then again usually when i'm in a situation where someone's just ordered domino's there's also alcohol involved and the next morning i'm too out of commission to actually cook anything so refrigerated pizza it is

cici's is amazingly bad and horrific to be in. it's like a chuck e cheese without the games.

Went with Domino's which served me well during many a late drunken night in the wilds of rural upstate NY.

when i lived in upstate new york i ordered from a regional chain called nirchi's. my roommate had a friend that worked there and she got us free pizza sometimes.

Dude, Dan, I don't even talk about the Chinese place that served me up a cockroach with its legs in the air and then tried to pass it off as a mushroom the way you talk about CPK. I feel like there must be a story here.

JBR - you went to Bingh@mpton, right (why do I remember these things?)? I was a couple hours further upstate and don't think we had those where I was.

cpk is some real bullshit it's true

yes, binghamton (no p).

CPK is just ridiculously overpriced

I hold verrrrrry long grudges against places that attempt to convince me that things like tandoori chicken are best enjoyed on a pizza (note: they have since ditched that particular menu item but the Thai chicken pizza is still available)

still remember those red plastic tumblers pizza hut had

I mean, Denny's served my dad oil and vinegar carafes with dead gnats forming a film across the meniscus and I would still eat there before going back to CPK because at least 80% of their menu is recognizable comfort food, albeit cooked in an old man's colostomy bag

book it was probably the best part of my childhood, like, i can obtain my favorite foods by engaging in my favorite activity?

fond memories of the pizza hut bread sticks too but i would probably die if i ate them now.

did pizza hut change their recipe at some point in the '90s? i loved it when i was a kid (i suspect BOOK IT! had something to do with it) and then when i ate it again as an adult i was like "the fuck is this garbage". probably it's just mozzarella-colored glasses tho

pretty much my experience exactly (including BOOK IT! connection). don't know if they changed it or if my kid taste buds were wack. definitely my favorite pizza joint growing up.

man I booked it like a mofucker back in the day

also for some reason as a kid I never got as antsy waiting for food to arrive as I did at a pizza hut

lol the "teachers" pic looks a little like debra lafave

oh wait, need link

http://www.bookitprogram.com/

do y'all order thin or thick crust at these joints? I prefer thin usually.

the Pizza Hut in the tiny tiny town where i lived during elementary had a pretty dope jukebox

thin crust is better at all of these places because it means you are eating less of this crap

my default is Pizza Boli's, which is so ubiquitous in Maryland that i tend to forget it's only a regional chain. only ones i've had in recent years are Papa John and Domino's, which for a while i got really used to ordering just because i had a log-in to order online. and at some point a decade or two ago i have probably had Pizza Hut and Little Ceaser's. so this is surprisingly difficult to call!

as we all know, the spageddy at sbarro is a+, how is the pizza?

so, happy joe's looks disgusting:

http://stlouis.metromix.com/content_image/full/2083574/518/370

http://visitcrookston.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/05/taco_pizza.jpg

I voted animatronics

my parents were pretty food snobby (as much as possible in a small town) so i was denied much of this as a kid. i had a happy joe's taco pizza at a friend's birthday party and it was like doing a line off the virgin mary's tits.

recognizable comfort food, albeit cooked in an old man's colostomy bag

this is so poetically rendered i want to eat what it describes, it's like reading war poetry & seeing a terrible beauty in the carnage

oh man i almost blacked out my freshman year where the on-campus sbarro was the most convenient eating option and i had wayyyy too much of that stuff.

i remember liking the quesadilla-like slices at sbarro's

http://casaveneracion.com/cooking/wp-content/uploads/2008/11/pizza2-sbarro.jpg

my parents were pretty food snobby (as much as possible in a small town) so i was denied much of this as a kid. i had a happy joe's taco pizza at a friend's birthday party and it was like doing a line off the virgin mary's tits.

^this, plus keeping kosher. sneaking a slice of shitty pepperoni pizza at the roller rink showed me the possibilities of the world.

I voted animatronics

my man.

This is counter-intuitive, but these disgusting pictures of pizza/this thread are giving me crazy pizza cravings.

i once ate sbarro's before a nine hour flight.

i...don't recommend this.

hey I think we're missing

http://mvny.org/images/places/outside-pizzeria-unos.jpg

another fond childhood favorite

i was gonna say i've been in Uno's a few times without ever ordering a pizza but i think i did once and it was pretty good?

Hungry Howie's or gtfo

I don't think I've ever been to uno's tbh

uno's is good if you like your sauce and cheese served on a 12" deep-dish crust made of nerf material

http://76.163.242.17/uploaded_images/uno-chicago-pizza-720816.jpg

^^ looks like something you would fix a pizzamobile with

is numero uno supposed to be pizzeria uno? aka the applebees of deep dish pizza

er xp

I haven't had any of these in a decade or more, so I have no idea. I never even heard of Papa John's until a couple of years ago. I guess out of what I have eaten from this list (Godfather's, Pizza Hut, Domino's, Sbarro, Little Caesar's, Round Table, and CPK) - Pizza Hut beats Domino's for the top spot, just for the lunch buffets they used to have. I used to work at Pizza Hut and still enjoyed it during and after my employment there. I probably ate more Domino's than PH because it was cheaper, and they delivered later at night than any Pizza Hut I ever lived near.

ayo beard papa, are you of THE beard papa?

anyway voted papa john's, like the chik-fil-a boycott had no effect on me cause chik-fil-a is crap, but a month of listening to people say FUCK PAPA JOHN'S was like craving torture

i think my brain has been rewired and i'm like a pro-papa john's sleeper agent or something, i'm scared of the things i'm capable of doing for that garlic lard

Love chik-fil-a. Sad I'm never gonna eat one again. ;_;

Never really had Pizza Hut in America; was denied this and other chain pizza because 'cheese food' and parents also picky/snobby about what they fed us, but when I was 12, could spend an hour on a few quarters' worth of the Ms Pac-Man in the Hut five blocks from my house.

Hey, up there! That's a Sbarro calzone. Did eat a lot of Sbarro in the '80s - they sold calzones/pizza by-the-slice and those were good, compared to the party pie cheese-food bombs available in nearby chains. NB in the Minnesota of 1984, you'd have to work hard at pizza to know calzone even existed...

Pizza Hut wins for the pizza + BOOK IT! + Back to the Future II sunglasses. Papa Johns a close second for breadsticks and garlic lard.

Don't know why I thought it would be rewarding to read this thread while eating

also:

pizza hut always had good arcade games, though. you were guaranteed at least one extremely frustrating game of shinobi while waiting for your pizza.

― apichathong song (strongo hulkington's ghost dad), Wednesday, July 20, 2011

sbarro pizza crust is straight up burnt cardboard

doesn't sbarro have 'real' calzones in addition to those crust-on-top pizza things?

i apparently have many thoughts about pizza hut strewn about ilx.

Fact: 10 seconds after I read the poll options I started farting.

xp - not of in any official sense; just an admirer

Papa johns is nasty. I ate there for the first time a few months back and got a simple cheese pizza. It was so gross I couldn't eat more than one slice. I'd rather just get a frozen Red Baron tbh.

Voting for the one that's always hot n ready.

Papa Johns is my choice from these, but I'm off that particular sauce until Schnatter gets hit by a careening limo or something.

Sense-memory, FB. xp

Sbarro has calzones. I loved them, once. Then I moved to New York.

Tonight's fancy British supermarket pizza topped by smoked bacon, mascarpone, and porcini but whenever I have these pizzas they taste as if I've left them about 60 seconds too long in the oven.

California Pizza Kitchen: Is there any difference between what they serve in their restaurants and what you buy from the grocery freezer? It's like paying someone 2.5 x as much money to throw a basic frozen pizza into an industrial oven instead of the one at your house. No a gram of love goes into the preparation of these pizzas. It tastes like MSG and processed cheese melted over saltine crackers. It's amazing how something as bland as a CPK pizza can cause such immense gastrointestinal distress. I guess I should thank them for scaring me away from the frozen food section once and for all.

I haven't done it recently but I used to buy CPK "Classic White" frozen pizza and add shrimp and extra garlic before cooking. This was to duplicate in my thrifty manner a local pizzeria's shrimp pizza. I liked the results just fine. I think I've only eaten in the restaurant once or twice, and while many of their pies seem misguided, I'm not sure they justify all the hate.

Will vote for Round Table, because that was my chain of choice about 20 years ago when I played volleyball after work.

CPK white frozen pizza is pretty good. i used to eat that stuff all the time. then I switched it up to a different flavor of theirs and I blew up my house for like two days.

there was fleetingly a bridge between when i was young, when i loved pizza hut, it had the ice cream bar, it had crutons at the salad buffet, you'd strategically arrange your bowl, where sitting in a booth was like collapsing into a hot yellow warm cheese beanbag; & being older, when i didn't go to pizza hut any more. i remember i used to walk by it & feel like i could get something by being one of the people in the window, like it would be a good date to go on, like what impediment would there be to having just a comfortingly nice time there if you went. everyone in pizza hut looks happy. maybe not up close, universally, there will be a family trying to pull children from playing under the table, burning the roofs of their mouths on pulled hot cheese, the sweetness cloys, pineapple in a meal with sips of a strawberry milkshake is dizzying, but it still exists in a different register from some sad mercenary limited-tomato pizza operation, to me. this was before they opened up their crazy science lab fusing different foods with mutant variations on the platonic pizza base, though.

x-post
I've had other of their frozen ones and don't remember thinking any was bad for a $5 frozen pizza.

little ceasar's crazy bread is on point tho

― J0rdan S., Monday, November 26, 2012

LC's pizza IS crazy bread

do y'all order thin or thick crust at these joints? I prefer thin usually.

Usually I'm shocked when I learn that it's friends who prefer pan/thick crusts, which in Pizza Hut's case is like devouring a loaf of Cuban bread yourself.

went with pizza butt on account it looks like curdled milk 50% of the time i have been near it.

the answer will always be stuffed crusts

esp if it has mustard drizzle

http://i.imgur.com/QvfFh.jpg

a free mustard drizzle

nnnnnnnnoooooooooooooooooooooooooo

I've met dicks with tastier crusts.

did those dicks come with a free drizzle, though

my high school had stuffed crust pizza for lunch, that's how i discovered i was lactose intolerant

in the right hands, a pretzel dog style stuffed crust pizza could be the ultimate thing

so could an IED.

read IUD

imagined pretzel dog iud

if you want to vote for Uno's just give that vote to Happy Joe's

who is Joe

custard jizzle

haven't had American Pizza Hut but Australian Pizza Hut meat lover's pizza was 13 year old me's favorite food in the whole world.

they order in Round Table occasionally at work and ugggggh it gives me the runs every time without fail. TMI but I don't care. Round Table more like Round Toilet Bowl.

briefly considered trolling DJP with a vote for CPK but decided I didn't want to risk my life

Rose Hotel in Sydney has a pizza that is better than if all the best cooks at all the pizza places on this thread got together and spent 100 years trying to do their best to rival it. Except for maybe CPK as everybody knows that shit is delicious

no one wants to hear about good pizza on this thread

IN A PIZZA HUT OVERSEAS

have i expounded on the worst british pizza i ever had? in luton (yeah, my own fault...), it was called 'california seafood pizza' and it was fresh basil, tuna fish, ranch dressing, and tinned sweetcorn.

― Eggs, Peaches, Hot Dogs, Lamb (remy bean), Monday, August 2, 2010 8:28 AM (2 years ago)

also eggs, peaces, hot dogs, and lamb

pizza made in all countries that aren't america is crap, including italy

whoa, i just learned that numero unos and pizzaria unos are different chains

huh really. which one is the asylum studios in the arrangement

Numero Unos is unknown to me. Uno's Chicago Grill is p. good chain pizza; better than Bertucci's.

I may have had Domino's, and possibly Papa John's but if I did they weren't memorable

I dunno about all these other ones

Pizza Hut why because

http://images.mentalfloss.com/blogs/wp-content/uploads/2011/09/book-it.jpg

so Pizza Inn is still a thing? i know i must have eaten there as a child, but i cant recall seeing one in years

There used to be a lot more of them and they were the regular pizza joint for my family as a kid. I only personally know of two remaining locations (I'm sure there are others) and they are in extremely rural places. BFE's favorite pizza place!

Only two Pizza Hut restaurants left in Miami, frequented mostly by Little League teams and their ravenous dads.

What is Pizza Inn? Is it as good as it sound? I would check into a motel just ot eat pizza, if the pizza were really good.

I've not eaten at all these, but the big three (Papa John's, Domino's and Pizza Hut) are all roughly the same quality. Poor, but tasty and cheap. Little Caesar's is even cheaper, still tasty, but probably a lateral move from frozen grocery store pizzas.

Guess I'll vote Sbarro just because of the depth of the menu.

corn on pizza in the UK is the accepted thing.

If Numero Uno is the same as the restaurant in Torrance, California then I'm voting for that based solely on their bread puffs and my childhood memories of joy.

Though out of the rest I'd say...Dominos?

corn on pizza is not right. I don't abide australians with their egg and beetroot pizzas either.

corn on pizza in the UK is the accepted thing.

― Gukbe, Monday, November 26, 2012 5:33 PM (23 seconds ago)

Gross. It's like putting sphagnum moss in your coffee.

cici's is nasty but also kid of fun bcuz BUFFET

OTM. Had an eating contest with two friends there one time. We piled the crusts on a plate in the middle of the table to keep count. I downed 24 slices, but the winner beat me by at least 10.

Toppers is stealthy taking the college pizza scene.

My mom and dad are Home Run Inn stans. Good stuff the one time I had it with them. Otherwise, I gotta say Domino's pepperoni, though haven't had it in a while.

red lobster
olive garden
ponderosa
sizzler
applebees
TGIFs
the 99

sad to see no mention of this place: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Peter_Piper_Pizza

i have a ton of fond memories associated with it but they all tend to involve the TMNT arcade game, not the pizza.

how do we always end up back here

i totally whupped tmnt the arcade game's ass at a dave and busters, but i feel this is outside the bounds of the thread

what is a dave and busters? i've seen them but they are filled with people that seem different than me.

The one pizza place in my college town had TMNT as well, so I associate the two together too.

Dave & Buster's is the grown man's Chuck E. Cheese.

btw thought I'd mention for the benefit of pizza hut stans itt, that there is now something called 'wingstreet' Pizza Hut is emphasizing its "WingStreet" brand

you know what this poll is missing?

http://www.pizzaranch.com

If Edward Hopper still lived he would have painted the desolation of a rest stop Sbarro's dining area at 9:30 p.m.

eazy is otm. dave and buster is chuck e. cheese with appletinis and no animatronics.

brb, moving into Dave & Buster's

no glowing nuclear purple ice cubes though

the first time i saw tmnt in the arcade (before i actually got a chance to play it) i dreamt about it for two days in a row.

― strongo hulkington (dubplatestyle), Friday, March 5, 2004

then there was a tiny picture of the nes port in nintendo power a month or two later and i just stared at it for hours.

― strongo hulkington (dubplatestyle), Friday, March 5, 2004

apparently i have lots of thoughts about tmnt the arcade game strewn about ilx too

DAN WE HAVE TO GO TO A DAVE AND BUSTERS

I've got one two miles north of me, frequented by HAPPY 21! birthdays and busloads of Brazilian tourists.

i vividly remember almost beating the simpsons arcade game at peter piper with a bunch of kids i'd just met at my 8th (9th?) birthday party and never saw again.

i haven't eaten there in like a decade but iirc it's pretty basic, cafeteria-level pizza -- i'd probably take that over the thing all pizza chains seem to do now where they pile a layer of muck over the pizza and serve it with a cup of melted fake butter.

oh man, if the fieri restaurant gets arcade games, it's all over for strongo.

dave & busters had airwolf videogame which i spent an entire afternoon playing with no care for food/beverage/life

dave and busters was p much the ultimate place to have a birthday party

i vividly remember almost beating the simpsons arcade game at peter piper with a bunch of kids i'd just met at my 8th (9th?) birthday party and never saw again.

haha j.d. i think i have a post saying the exact same thing about tmnt somewhere

WE WERE BROTHERS...for five minutes after the credits rolled

also last time I was at dave and busters they had an awesome rambo shooting video game that made me go a little insane

dave and buster's video games are all golden tee and buck hunter. place blows.

That wasn't a Rambo game.

It was a PIZZA

I was 13 when I last set foot in a Pizza Hut. I insisted on going despite my mother's protests, since Pizza Hut had its all-you-can-eat option at the time and I hardly got to eat there normally on a/c of living so far away. Just as we sat down to eat who should walk in but my entire year of school boarders, all out for "restaurant night". My stomach sank - these were the last people with whom I would ever want to share a restaurant while dining with my family, esp. at that age. This wasn't the US, there were no real booths to speak of, so there was nowhere to hide while they persisted in heckling and making catcalls at my sister (a year older and mortified) from across the room. My mother, already hostile, hissed at me to ignore them and enjoy my meal, but I didn't stand a chance. Never have I felt the depths of despair as acutely as that evening, when I was forced to exit Pizza Hut after only one trip to the all-you-can-eat buffet.

I love when these threads get all personal narrative-y

the last time I was at an all-you-can-eat pizza hut my drunk college friend put his head under the soft-serve machine and opened the tap which got us kicked out

worth it imo

who among us has not directly drank from the soft-serve tap

Voted Domino's, btw. They seem to have upped their game a tad lately, but you have to know the right kind of pizzas to order, unless you don't mind trial and error.

okay I am pretty sure Fieri's restaurant and D&B are within walking distance of each other

!!!

this changes evrything

dan i wish you were single and i was a woman

hahaha

Having worked at Domino's in the 90s for a year and then again for five years, I've just now gotten to where I can even smell that smell again without wanting to barf.

i can't remember if it was here or just relating it to directly to an ilxor about my experience with the dominos bread bowl pasta

how am i not dead?

well then you would have precious insights into how they recalibrated their crust recipe

dave & buster's is crazily overpriced. fuck that place.

i don't understand the CPK hate, their mushroom pizza with chicken added on is perfectly tasty, if overpriced.

and they do the ol' trick of having you buy tokens instead of just put coins/dollars in the games, so after a couple beers you have no concept of how much you're paying for a play.

from the dave & buster's website:

Egg Allergy Menu* (PDF) Fish Allergy Menu (PDF)Milk Allergy Menu (PDF)Peanut Allergy Menu *(PDF)Shelfish Allergy Menu(PDF) Soy Allergy Menu (PDF)Tree Nut Allergy Menu (PDF)Wheat Gluten Allergy Menu(PDF)

I find it hard to believe CPK has a mushroom pizza that doesn't also have on it pate, Cinnabon rolls and appletinis

well then you would have precious insights into how they recalibrated their crust recipe

I know they're pretending now like they never used to sell a deep dish pizza, but they did. And people bought them like crazy. The big difference now is that the crusts are fresh and not frozen. The old ones were rock hard discs that softened up in the oven, but looked like they were made of foam rubber before cooking.

btw guys the bread bowl pasta may have been the worst thing i've ever voluntarily put in my mouth

wanted to leave that one wide open for djp

wide open where?

it's appreciated!

i'm so lonely

but no, seriously, it was fucking rank

does the $3-$5 frozen CPK in grocery stores have any relation to real-life CPK?

A lot of Domino's weirder and quickly disappearing menu items are often cooked up by people in various stores across the chain during the afternoon while business is slow. We used to concoct some odd things for our consumption only while I worked there. I made a beef stew pizza once.

Domino's -- only recently had this at noon conference / lunch lectures, i guess it's okay, maybe better than in years past?
Papa John's -- worked there for a brief, sad, spell. i've always liked the sauce, tbh, and the ingredients were pretty decent (nothing from cans). i will cop to having ordered from them at least four times in the last year
Pizza Hut -- as a kid, PH was the jam, but only if you actually went there. p sure it's terrible now.
Little Caesar's -- no experience
Numero Uno -- same
Pizza Inn -- same
California Pizza Kitchen -- didn't realize they existed outside the freezer aisle?
Round Table -- what the hell is this?
Sbarro -- horrible airport food
Shakey's/Happy Joe's/Home Run Inn -- never heard of any of these
Godfather's -- never had it
Chuck E. Cheese's -- no recollection of the pizza, but i played the shit out of X-MEN
CiCi's -- ?

does the $3-$5 frozen CPK in grocery stores have any relation to real-life CPK?

they are indistinguishable. the cheese on the frozen ones may cling harder to the roof of your mouth..

Domino's -- Awful. Even after their so-called revamp.
Papa John's -- My favorite on the list, tho "tastes like donuts" is sort of otm -- pretty syrupy. I guess I like sweet sauce.
Pizza Hut -- Honestly all I think of with Pizza Hut is the taste and consistency of their grease. I can sort of remember there being pizza involved, but mostly just grease.
Little Caesar's -- Soto otm about their cardboard crust. Like if you buy a frozen pizza, heat it, and then reheat it the next day.
Numero Uno -- I've had this, but no memory of it at all.
Pizza Inn -- Never had.
California Pizza Kitchen -- Never had.
Round Table -- Never had.
Sbarro -- My go-to mall food in high school. At the time, the large slices seemed like a bonus. Now they seem like punishment.
Shakey's/Happy Joe's/Home Run Inn/Godfather's -- Never had, barely heard of.
Chuck E. Cheese's -- Pretty sure the pizza's terrible, but like others I have fond childhood memories. I took my kids there in April for one of their birthdays, but we skipped the pizza and went straight to the video games.
CiCi's -- This is THE WORST. Really, really, unconscionably awful. An inedible, cruel, sick-joke mockery of the whole idea of "pizza." On the plus side, it's all you can eat!

CiCi's atrocities, l-r: macaroni and cheese pizza, breadstick (or possibly a rotting fish, I can't tell), pepperoni pizza

http://www.pe.com/incoming/20120330-dining_cicis_0120a.jpg.ece/BINARY/w380x253/DINING_CICIS_0120a.jpg

fond memories of little caesar's:

-my dad ordering it and having the pizza show up with the slice nexus in one corner, so that some slices were a couple of inches long and others were 14" or whatever. lol stoner kids.

-i knew this girl who worked there and she let us come back and make ourselves a pizza one day. probably explains the above situation.

hahaha oh man uneven slices

mac & cheese pizza sounds good though.

i feel kind of guilty for wanting pizza hut pizza since i live in a city with three pizza shops per block

Uggggghhhhh

Best odd pizza I've ever had was apple slices, goat cheese, no sauce.

in my defense i have 22 years of books i've read w/o compensatory pizza

I'm about to go out to what should be a nice Italian dinner, but after this thread I'll be dreaming of Domino's pepperoni I'm afraid.

NYC slice shops are full of pasta-pizza combos. I had a baked ziti slice once at 2 in the morning, and it was really bad. I don't know why I expected otherwise.

http://www.pe.com/incoming/20120330-dining_cicis_0120a.jpg.ece/BINARY/w380x253/DINING_CICIS_0120a.jpg

― something of an astrological coup (tipsy mothra), Monday, November 26, 2012 6:51 PM (10 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

this may honestly be a more disgusting image than the cigar box, no joke

Classic half-ass pepperoni on the right: one pepperoni slice in each corner, minus the tip.

those pepperonis look like week old scabs

week old blood blisters

i'm eatin here

the fact that i'm eating week-old blood blisters notwithstanding

honestly the pepperoni are probably the least offensive thing about it. salty cured meat is salty cured meat.

Thinking of pizza-by-the-slice joints: $2.50 cheese, $3.50 pepperoni. Only difference is two pepperonis in the corners.

mac & cheese pizza sounds good though.

the only place that's pulled it off really well in my experience is a joint here called Ian's, and it's kind of their thing:
http://www.madisonmagazine.com/Madison-Magazine/October-2012/Brianna%27s%20Web%20Project/Ians.jpg

have i expounded on the worst british pizza i ever had? in luton (yeah, my own fault...), it was called 'california seafood pizza' and it was fresh basil, tuna fish, ranch dressing, and tinned sweetcorn.
― Eggs, Peaches, Hot Dogs, Lamb (remy bean), Monday, August 2, 2010 8:28 AM (2 years ago)

lol luton

i had a large dominos in a post-alcohol moment when i deeply needed it recently. it had meatballs, chili peppers, and french's mustard. a spanish guy came over and stole some and talked to me about death for several minutes while i was eating.

the starch-as-topping pizza is a rich vein to be mined for sure - but the only one I can recall off the top of my head as being 100% unfuckwithable is the mashed potato pizza

i had mac & cheese on a hot dog once. kinda vile, even though it was from a gourmet hot dog place.

mac + cheese + hot dog + egg + mashed potato pizza sounds really good right now.

god photos of pizza are so depressing

nunez your pizza dream sounds like a war crime

like I think I just vomited

so are mashed potatoes

http://www.notmartha.org/images/other/2009oct/meathand/ketchup/second_outofoven.jpg

wtf is that

starch as topping just seems kinda pointless to me

I had mashed potato pizza recently (possibly at the same place you've had it dan) and it was perfectly eh whatever

a mashed potato hand

looks like a smashed zombie hand

haha iatee, probably but I still maintain that's a good pizza

like, potato chip pizza. make it happen.

can you believe that I've only smoked weed like once ever in my life

you took such a big bong hit that you are still high 5 years later

mixing fried rice into my mashed potatoes

cool ranch doritos crunch calzone

rotisserie chicken twinkie cheetos nacho meat lover's

stoner SEO

i wonder if there's a place that makes loco moco pizza and serves that to anyone who asks for 'hawaiian'

funyun potsticker teriyaki

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x3gm6K1g5QU

oh look, Chang's making really shitty tteokbokki...

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tteokbokki

Write in vote for Homemade Pizza Company.

Hey, where's Papa Gino's?

lol because tteokbokki is made with wheat flour tteoks right???

oh here is one weird tip: take sliced rice cakes ( 떡 ), coat with butter, put in toaster oven, watch them puff up a little and brown, season with salt, eat when it's still chewy/toasty. also put on top of pizza.

i haven't had many of these but am voting domino's, it is actually reasonably decent these days. pizza hut is not even food and papa john's is secretly disgusting.

lol "secretly"

Papa John's has a secret ingredient, and that secret ingredient is "ass"

not sexy "oh hey Halle Berry's bikini bottom, how did you end up in my smoothie" ass, but "sweaty bepimpled trucker had to decide between an on-time delivery and screaming burrito sharts" ass

I think history will look back on the rise of papa john's as just a transitional period between americans eating pizza for dinner and americans eating donuts for dinner

like obviously children in the future will be horrified at the idea that people were putting rancid tomato sauce on their dinner donuts but it was an important part of making this shift socially acceptable

Pizza Hut's crust is even bigger ass!

I mean, PJ's thin crust is thinner than Bill Magill's patience.

Pizza Hut's crust is even bigger ass!

I refuse to agree with that even though my last encounter with Pizza Hut pizza made me believe I was actually eating vomit

You were. You just hadn't realised it yet.

Strawberry Cones is a Japanese chain that tried to get a foothold here (any left? I think the 2 in LA closed). They had some really oddball pizzas, but I tried a few and some were really good.

http://www.strawberrycones.com/en/campaign/chikutan.html

Better view of menu: http://www.strawberrycones.com/en/menu/

Round Table ffs

They have suits of armor in their restaurants

Man vs Food leads me to believe the US serves as much fat-bottomed bullshit as we do

of these, have only ever had dominos and little caesars in the 80s, and pizza hut in bike-fueled, small-town desperation in the 90s. and i've had sbarros in a mall somewhere in the past 10 years, which was not totally offensive. so i guess sbarros.

i've been to chuckecheese's for a kids birthday party, i must have repressed that it was a pizza joint.

Little Caesars' slogan is still "Pizza Pizza," but they don't do the 2-for-1 thing anymore. Which was 80% of their appeal ("Eh, this is OK...wait, I get TWO?! Cool!")

And I didn't know Home Run Inn had physical locations. I only knew it as a frozen pizza you could only get in the Chicago area (and it was probably the best frozen pizza I've had).

Pizza Ranch is the closest to bad pizza but all pizza's really good

in Cambridge UK, I once ordered a supreme pizza at Pizza Hut and received a pizza with kernels of corn on it

My first week in Birmingham during study abroad... I asked my English flatmate what kind of pizza he wanted for dinner. He said "tuna corn?"

Hard to blame Pizza Hut for British pizza tastes.

my default is Pizza Boli's, which is so ubiquitous in Maryland that i tend to forget it's only a regional chain

absolute nadir of local chain pizza in DC = manny and olga's. the one near where i was living was even an active front for an iphone-fencing ring all last spring

papa gino's would probably get my vote if it were an option

Domino's - pretty boring/ok but Domino's sausage pizza is AWESOME
Papa John's - pretty good and the garlic dipping sauce is omfg amazing
Pizza Hut - my favorite bcz I like deep dish pizza and the dough is awesome
Little Caesar's - eh
Numero Uno - what is this
Pizza Inn - for real?
California Pizza Kitchen - I see these in the freezer at SuperFresh sometimes?
Round Table - great name, keep it up guys
Sbarro - this place is a sad punchline; I only see it in/near transportation hubs like across from Penn Station and very airport I've ever been in, and slices are, like, $5.79 or some shit and taste exceptionally awful.
Shakey's - idiotic name
Happy Joe's - dumb name
Home Run Inn - awful name
Godfather's - My grandparents had one of these near them and it was actually really, really good.
Chuck E. Cheese's - I don't remember, I was 7
CiCi's - reminds me of The Nanny

Was wrong about saying my folks are Home Run Inn stans--they're Round Table stans, in the redwoods.

Round Table is the best of these by far, but I will literally eat and enjoy any pizza - even things like microwaved cardboard squares with pinkish sauce at a miniature golf course.

Also, there is one good pizza at CPK, the thin crispy crust 'Sicilian' which is ironically the opposite of what you might expect.

favorite excluded regional chains: Jet's, Cottage Inn

in the next town over there's a Kmart with a Little Caesar's dining area that hasn't fully given over to the 21C Hot'n'Ready quick-buck marketing paradigm, and will actually take orders and make pizzas, so if you're willing to spend fifteen minutes pawing through the huge bins of $5 DVDs Kmart has on hand they will actually make you a fresh pizza and still charge it really cheap. It's not bad at all.

next town over from where I live that is

Haven't eaten any of this stuff in probably 15 years, but Round Table is the only one I have any nostalgia for. Shakey's was kind of a cool place but I don't remember the pizza being any good. Those were both good old pizza parlors unlike the little hole-in-the-wall delivery joints like Dominos or Little Caesar's.

http://www.allhikers.com/allhikers/Visitor-Information/Tusayan/Tusayan%20we%20cook%20pizza%20thumbnail.jpg

shakey's had the best signs

http://blogs.redding.com/mbeauchamp/Shakey
http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/9/96/Shakeysign1.jpg
http://farm4.staticflickr.com/3069/3099826173_4eda734e2e.jpg
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Iz2AW_0EScg

Subway has pizza now, maybe they could have been included.

Another old California chain, Straw Hat, used to have a beautiful logo:
http://conejovalleymemories.files.wordpress.com/2009/12/2343295371_ff7ecb2f21.jpg

Straw Hat and Round Table were both tastefully dark, carpeted, with angular polished wood dividers, beamed and diagonal wood ceilings and lots of ferns. They also had great pizza - thin, crispy underside, soft on top with big charred dough bubbles, sweet sauce and very spicy pepperoni.

this really gets at the vibe too:
http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3298/3268717547_29ce949d0c_o.jpg

i live near a shakey's but haven't attempted eating there

LA has a chain called big mama and papa's, their specialty is a 36" pie

am i tripping or did shakey's also offer fried chicken in addition to pizza?

round table is the best of these IMO but i think they put MSG on their pizzas because every time i have it i get dizzy and lightheaded

i am sad to say that in my work as a teacher i have bribed a lot of kids with dominos / little caesars / papa john's pizza

Pizza Hut was the go-to location for me and my friends between the ages of 11 and 18 so I have many many fond memories of it, and the pizza is perfectly acceptable to me even to this day. There's NO POINT being snobbish about pizza IMO.

Dominos is pretty ok if a little pricey, agreed that it's far nicer the morning after. Had Papa John's once but my housemates ordered some poncey one (with spinach or some shit like that on it) so I'm not sure if it's good or not.

Mmmmm this pizza is perfectly acceptable!

papa gino's would probably get my vote if it were an option

― scream blahula scream (govern yourself accordingly), Tuesday, November 27, 2012 1:51 AM (7 hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

yeah where is papa gino's!

papa gino's is northeast regional isn't it?

though i guess some of these others must be too since i've never seen half of them

yeah i guess it is.

home run inn has 9 locations and papa gino's has 200 tho.

Horrifying regional pizza chain of my youth:

http://www.ithacapudgies.com/newithacastore.jpg

Pudgies? That is straight out up out of a sitcom.

looks like the kind of place where a botched robbery led to a grizzly murder

Even as a pizza-loving kid, I was a little sickened by the idea of eating at Pudgies.

the only one I can recall off the top of my head as being 100% unfuckwithable is the mashed potato pizza

http://distilleryimage6.s3.amazonaws.com/13e5d3d0c6ea11e1b00112313800c5e4_7.jpg
massive xps, but one of the most decadent, and delicious, things i ever cooked.

"Welcome to Pudgie's, home of the pork rind pizza!"

http://slice.seriouseats.com/archives/2012/07/home-slice-aligot-bacon-pizza-with-fried-potato-peels.html?ref=search

Pork rind crust injected with the congealed grease it was fried in

in Cambridge UK, I once ordered a supreme pizza at Pizza Hut and received a pizza with kernels of corn on it

yeah britishes don't understand corn. it's weird. it appears on lots of chain pizzas here, not just pizza hut. the tuna and corn thing is also common. except they call it sweetcorn. I don't know what non-sweet corn would be.

saltcorn pizza was not a hit

umanicorn pizza did okay though

The cornhole burner, however

qed-ing salsa's post here but yeah i mean corn is hard to understand. i can understand putting corn on a pizza because i feel like it is a roving, shamanistic vegetable. like where does it actually belong? what meal is there where corn is integral or has a traditional place & can not be excised? gumbo? is that the actual only meal? it's just something you add when you remember you have it & want to see yellow. on pizza, why not, add some corn, there it is.

lolling at the idea of 'the corn shaman'

just a wandering shaman who sprinkles corn on the sick and wounded

do not want corn in gumbo

the godfather's pizza we lived somewhat near when I was a little kid had fucking awesome video games, and my parents would give me enough quarters to play until the pizza came out, so classic

corn in gumbo is good. i think i heard a thing about gumbo once, that it was such a flexible recipe, so malleable to whatever was on hand, that the only staple ingredient that people could find across all the different variations was like ... onion. or corn. or i guess the roux. okra & corn are the two sorta must-haves i think, though i just made some w/o both, so. i feel like your rejection of corn in even such an amendable, liberal environ as a gumbo proves my point; it goes where it pleases, it can be invited to any meal, it has no home but it weaves an interesting & varied path in life.

Corn on pizza is pretty good if done correctly. The local places that have specialty pizza and sell late night slices do ok with it.

I don't think I'd trust Pizza Hut, or British people in general, with corn.

that is reasonable
i am just trying to give voice to the voiceless here, & let you know what is happening in these peoples' minds

I had no idea straw hat pizza was a longstanding chain

there's one near my work and I always think 'man that is a stupid name for a pizza restaurant' because it sounds like the pizzas are made from straw hats and who would want to eat that

google review for Pete's Pizza, the pizza joint in my hometown (now closed)

A Google User reviewed 4 years ago
Overall Excellent

i apolagize for when im drunk and mean but you pizza is the best pizza that ive come across in all my vast travvels to pizza places in colac congratulations and keep up the good work.

-- it's claim to fame was not so much that the pizza was any good but that they stayed open after the pubs were shut so there was always a crowd of like 20 drunk people standing out the front at midnight. also cop cars. also vomit. and fistfights.

And I didn't know Home Run Inn had physical locations. I only knew it as a frozen pizza you could only get in the Chicago area (and it was probably the best frozen pizza I've had).

OMG, this x 1,000,000. Never been to the actual restaurant (mostly because I didn't realize it was a restaurant for a long time), but the frozen variety is one of the best pizzas I've had, full stop. And the crust is amazing rather than perfunctory, which is a bonus. I think I'm going out to buy a Home Run margherita now. Seriously, try it if you ever get a chance. It puts most of the rest of this garbage to shame.

i have to admit i've ordered from many a subpar pizza shop after the bars have closed, but never a chain.

maybe just because i've more or less always lived in a part of the country where it's possible to get even decent-crappy pizza at 3 am.

http://www.lorenzoandsonspizza.com/aboutus545.html

I can't think of that many national pizza chains in the UK other than Domino's, Big Red (don't really know what that is) and the dreadful Pizza Hut, that aren't "upmarket" like Pizza Express (decent enough) or Ask or Zizi's or whatever.
Think Domino's has to be the most grim, probably because of the disappointment after waiting for the delivery. At least when you walk into Pizza Hut the air feels greasy and your expectations are lowered.

What happened to Deep Pan in the UK?

oh yeah, we had one in our town but it's long gone.
That's one of the main things I miss about the US, having tons of cheap, good, local pizza places to choose from that deliver.

-- it's claim to fame was not so much that the pizza was any good but that they stayed open after the pubs were shut so there was always a crowd of like 20 drunk people standing out the front at midnight. also cop cars. also vomit. and fistfights.

― set the controls for the heart of the sun (VegemiteGrrl), Tuesday, November 27, 2012 11:38 AM (51 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

there's one in every college town, and it always makes the worst pizza you've ever had sober

yeah I don't think i ever had a pizza from there in daylight and/or sober hours

the thing I miss most abt australian pizza is piles and piles of shredded ham

i think ham is pretty weird in general so i am maybe biased but ham on pizza seems super wrong to me. something to do with it cooking, glazing over. it's all wrong texturally. like where does it fit.

my pizzametrics are fucked though. egg: interesting. rocket: not avant-garde. corn: pile it on.

Pizza Man was missed in the poll, that one is national, right? Worst restaurant pizza I've ever had.

What happened to Deep Pan in the UK?

hopefully it choked on its own disgusting wodges of thick dough

I have fond memories of pepperoni lovers pizza at the Hut, eaten with an acquaintance who would a few years later slaughter his parents & sister at night in their home. I remember he ate two whole pizzas himself when we ate together. he was executed last year. I just read that his last meal was pizza.

welp

...

pizza? what? no, loathe the stuff

He also had breadsticks.

Now that is how you bring a thread to a screeching halt (obvs avoiding the usual thread-stopping nomenclature in this particular instance).

Austerity Ponies on the good sleuthing! I lolled at the breadstick detail too

wonder if he asked for the Hut for the last one

maybe he was just all, fuckit I'm being executed anyway let's go with CPK

http://i3.mirror.co.uk/incoming/article754648.ece/ALTERNATES/s615/The+last+supper+requested+by+Timothy+McVeigh+hours+before+being+executed+on+death+row

not bad, not bad

all execution meals should be in the form of pizza imo

ie icecream pzza

all execution should be in the form of pizza

http://disinfo.s3.amazonaws.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/10/GimmePizza.jpg

I have fond memories of pepperoni lovers pizza at the Hut, eaten with an acquaintance who would a few years later slaughter his parents & sister at night in their home. I remember he ate two whole pizzas himself when we ate together. he was executed last year. I just read that his last meal was pizza.

― Euler, Tuesday, November 27, 2012 1:00 PM (2 hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

perhaps we are all just two pizza hut pizzas short of a double murder parricide/fratricide...

makin it great!

Book it!? more like Book 'em!

totally dug getting my personal pan pizzas from Book It! Still have mostly fond memories of Pizza Hut pan pizza. My vote went to Sbarros though, for unclear reasons.

just thinking about these places is givin me the shits

ew

that is not how my the shits work

ew

― I loves you, PORGI (DJP), Tuesday, November 27, 2012 5:44 PM (27 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

person who wrote "sweaty bepimpled trucker had to decide between an on-time delivery and screaming burrito sharts" ass" is grossed out by the weirdest things, apparently

hahaha

I never claimed my jokes painted a logically consistent picture

can't believe I forgot Gumby's

dammit

we had a Gumby's in Ames. I ate a totally graceless amount of Gumby's for no good reason

http://i.imgur.com/yJhuz.jpg

ayo anybody wanna go in on this w me

hold on let me rip a bong hit

no corn no credibility

That picture looks like someone scooped a bunch of half-eaten fast food into an empty pizza box except whoops there was still a pizza in there.

Gumby's in Ames, closed, aero. I am so sorry to have to tell you this :(

for about six months we'd be visiting a friend who lived in town and it'd reach midnight and someone would say "We should order some pokey sticks" followed by a pause, then everyone looking very sad

http://heavytable.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/06/Pokey-Stix.jpg

http://heavytable.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/06/Pokey-Stix.jpg

you can cut it into the tiniest pieces as you like, it still tastes like baked insulation foam

No Mr. Gatti's either!

In Berkeley, Gumby's became Krusty's, which became West Coast Pizza, but they still had those cheese chicks at 3am.

This is CPK, easy. I don't even get why DJP and others reject it. I assume they didn't actually invent barbecue chicken pizza, the only interesting innovation in pizza that took place during my childhood, but they made it massively popular, and the world of pizza is better off as a result.

Sentimental childhood favorite is Shakey's, obviously.

Sometimes I really miss pot. mh's "pokey sticks" are really doing that for me right now.

We used to joke that a cloud of smoke popped out when you opened the box. Or the herbs and spices were spiked with deliciousness.

Papa Johns, although I love Uno's as a kid. They don't have them on the West coast. Deep dish, right?

Pizza Huts are great for walking into and pretending it's 1989 though. None of these other places offer time travel like that

man it sounds blasphemous but pizzeria uno's used to have this pizza with spinach and whole button mushrooms and it was the greatest

http://farm2.staticflickr.com/1025/886819372_b76af54d0a.jpg

for about six months we'd be visiting a friend who lived in town and it'd reach midnight and someone would say "We should order some pokey sticks" followed by a pause, then everyone looking very sad

this is the saddest story I have ever heard

if you tell me Pita Pita is gone I'm going to be very upset

ayo that pizza looks great

like if you're gonna go deep dish go all the way whole button mushrooms

yeah i've never made pizza before but i'm gonna try to recreate it i think

i like the cut of yr jib, dayo

I think I may have bad news on that one too. :(

That place started reminding me of ilx -- it was owned by the wife of one of my professors, named s1utsky

Man, pokey stix! Pita pit! Those two places pretty much summed up my culinary life in champaign..

(Although I don't think I ever had an actual pizza from gumby's..)

That picture looks like someone scooped a bunch of half-eaten fast food into an empty pizza box except whoops there was still a pizza in there.

Welcome to Scotland:
http://farm5.static.flickr.com/4035/5075157103_91c635a349.jpg

Gumby dammit and pokey sticks = college

no not pita pit. Pita Pita. privately owned place, the woman who ran it was iirc the only person who worked there, Israeli, best falafel in Iowa I don't doubt. that place is gone? brb sackcloth and ashes

haha is this the same place you claimed serves the best hummus in all of america

no the best hummus is in Columbus, Ohio, and this is supported by our man from Tel Aviv whose position on U.S. hummus is generally "this is not hummus"

he says there's one other place beside the Columbus place that gets it right, and it's a small joint in iirc Queens

man who knew the bread basket of america was also the chickpea basket of america

is the queens place kabab cafe in astoria?

I never get tired of telling that story tbh because on that tour we were having hummus every day, and every time my man would 1) kill 3/4 of the provided hummus in about two minutes flat and 2) sneer and say "this is not hummus, this is shit" as he decimated it so it became a whole thing, finding hummus that I'd call good and running it past The Judge, and then in Columbus the food offerings looked grim indeed so I just went into the deli lookin joint and said what the hell, I'll get the hummus, but it takes 'em like 10 minutes to get it ready and I was like "huh. wonder what's up" and I take it backstage and my man says instantly: "this looks legit" and then tried it and launched into an unforgettable rhapsody of praise

xp I don't know I'll ask him

...I doubt Kebab Cafe is the place, Egyptian hummus is different from Israeli hummus iirc

x-posts - omg the munchy box which is amazing on several levels aside from just its name.

maybe he's thinking of something super obscure but there isn't that much israeli food in queens

In Berkeley, Gumby's became Krusty's, which became West Coast Pizza, but they still had those cheese chicks at 3am.

― pun lovin criminal (polyphonic), Tuesday, November 27, 2012 7:13 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

that is very interesting, I just thought it was something local. I was all about those.

God, I hope this Wikipedia fact about the munchy box is true:

In a September 2012 visit to Scotland, action movie star Steven Seagal claimed that it was one of his favourite examples of Scottish cuisine, stating that while it is exceptionally unhealthy, 'it shows a great coming-together of cultures' within the country.

Yes. I would like very much for that fact to be true too.

I think there is a super obscure place yeah. I just now got the thumbs-up for Taim & Hummus Place but I am expecting a more detailed breakdown of acceptable NY hummuses

I want a munchy box right now

No you don't.

the hell he doesn't.

I think the best hummus is fresh made but it's not feasible for many places to do that. but it's much more feasible in places where people eat hummus allll the time. same dynamic as bread in france. xp

give it to me

pretty much the only thing that would make that better is if they could work a taco in there somewhere

or like a rack of lamb

no munchy boxes before 11 on weekdays otherwise you might die

"kebab meat, fried chicken, pizza, chicken tikka, onion rings, pakora, naan bread, garlic bread, coleslaw"

A taco would be a fine addition though, it's true.

egg rolls

Munchy Boxxxes 8: A Great Cumming-Together Of Cultures

Trust me, no-one wants a Scottish-made taco. Just have more kebab meat instead.

maybe i can import this idea to america. u.s.a it up a bit. there's surely enough drunken frat boys out there. this could be my golden ticket.

I was literally just going to post that someone needs to open a munchy box shop in a college town somewhere here.

I think it would seriously make millions.

dr. strongo's slop box.

I'm amazed the US doesn't already have a munchy box equivalent. It makes the KFC Double Down look like refreshing summer salad.

GUYS

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Deep-fried_pizza

http://www.justconservative.com/image-files/braveheart-picture-3.jpg

I think the KFC Famous Bowl or w/e is a better comparison. The Double Down is... actually not horrible for you, if you don't mind the fact it's all meat

http://i.imgur.com/X5Hwx.jpg

this plate is calling to me

it's saying my name

deep-fried pizza in my experience is hit or miss

i mean you gotta eat it as soon as it comes out of the fryer pretty much, which means you have to eat it in public, which means a whole new level of shame to get past.

needless to say i have gotten past that level of shame.

While we're on the topic of Scotland's shame, you guys know about the deep-fried Mars bar, right?

http://www.ilike.org.uk/images/deep-fried-mars-bar.jpg

Fried pizza is pretty common here (Northeastern Pennsylvania), too. It is wonderful.

EVERYONE knows about the deep-fried Mars bar; it is wonderful

mmmm deep fried things

http://cdn.oddstuffmagazine.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/09/Fried-frog-legs.jpg

I had a deep fried Mac 'n Cheese pie in Scotland. That was pretty amazing, I gotta say.

I think I may be having a stroke or something because it appears that E has strung together a whole bunch of random words in place of the name of a dish

you guys, what about the garbage plate?

http://rocwiki.org/Garbage_Plates

xxp Jesus christ. No wonder Scotland's near the top of the world's heart disease tables.

NICK TAHOUS YES

fried haggis everyone

http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_D99fshP6YcY/S9lnCfMylpI/AAAAAAAAABU/b1npokXWXzo/s1600/untitled.bmp

Nick Tahou! Glad that place is still open, I had heard it maybe closed. I have had a few late-night Garbage Plates.

there's a place in jersey (maybe in pennsylvania) that takes an entire eight-inch stromboli and just tosses it in the deep-fryer. one time i made the mistake of also ordering fries. the gods of proper digestion were angry that night.

I was totally going to mention the garbage plate. When I was in college upstate that thing was legendary. It's what the munchy box made me think of immediately. I had one at NT once. It was simultaneously fucking disgusting and amazingly good tbh. Yes, I'm a disgusting human being.

omg that fried haggis looks like heaven crossed with a Venus flytrap

That fried haggis looks kinda like a fried metroid.

that fried haggis looks horrific

it shouldn't be reminding me of the vulva puppets, right

mmmm deep-fried mother brain

Google was made for marvelous permutations of "fried" and "Scotland."

lol DJP I hadn't thought about it but it totally looks like the vulva puppet

http://thenovicechefblog.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/03/DSC_4099-1024x685.jpg

http://i.imgur.com/WE8Dt.jpg

who deep fries a deer hoof?

be quiet and eat it

historically i should vote for papa john's but i'm abstaining

lol dayo

who deep fries a deer hoof?

it would have spared us quality music listeners hours of pain

I am so hungry for a scotch egg right now

it's kind of depressing how hungry this thread is making me

eat your deer hoof

xp I know, right? Slightly concerned that there are at least four places I have to walk past on the way home where I could buy a munchy box and I have nothing at home for dinner.

I suppose you can do a 'munchy box' in the US by going to a chinese buffet and getting takeout by the pound. but chinese buffets are not open late night

not...yet anyway.

it's not a buffet but you all most come to Boston so I can take you to the Hong Kong for 2 AM scorpion bowls and Peking DUMPLINGS!

wongo hulkington's jade palace late night buffet

Someone needs to invent a Chinese buffet bus that makes house calls.

actually I wonder if the place in Chinatown that used to do 4 AM "cold tea" is still around

lol @ wongo

"rejected flash gordon villain names"

http://news.bbc.co.uk/media/images/41987000/jpg/_41987400_scorpion_dish_203.jpg

http://www.cooke.ru/images/pages/2009/0604090926_M_fried_scorpion_350.jpg

take 1 large empty amazon box

1 - go to taco bell and get a taco. put in box.
2 - go to pizzeria and get a slice of pizza. put in box
3. go to chinese restaurant get chow mein. put in box.
4. go to 7-11 and get a chili cheese dog. put in box.
5. go to KFC and get a 3 piece box and gravy. put in box.

get a 6 pack of beer.

sit on the floor in the middle of the living room with beers and box of food and eat lovingly. (with Boston's Piece of Mind playing in the background while the hockey simulataneously plays on tv)

Eat til you cry tears of pure fat.

xp I think we may have found one of the few things an inebriated Glaswegian would draw the line at eating, no matter how thick the batter it was smothered in.

I have further information on aero's Pita Pita sadness: it has been replaced with "Mr. Burrito" which I am told has "really fucking good mexican food" including "lengua and tripa and buche"

I have no idea how this figures into the grand scheme of things, but rip falafel

http://www.travelblog.org/Photos/1890986

I would not be at all surprised to find an actual scorpion in one of the Kong's scorpion bowls

you go to a place called "the Kong"

me and like a billion other people

http://i.imgur.com/eWhf3.jpg

i had snake wine once.

it was okay. i expected it to be more...snake-y. i guess.

PAGING JJJUSTEN AND AUSTERITY PONIES

I have never had anything at the Kong but beer and scorpion bowls.

Wait are you talking about the Hong Kong in Cambridge? Yeah, I've never eaten there but good God have I been drunk there. Never again etc.

word to the wise; only order food after a scorpion bowl

I've never been in the Kong but I have heard tales.

EVERYONE MUST GO TO THE KONG

The last time I was there I had gone out with co-workers after work and we got so fucking shitfaced (on empty stomachs) that the next thing I knew it was 1:00 a.m. and I couldn't find one of them so I took off and went home not realizing that she was actually passed out in a bathroom stall or that I had her bag and so she had to no phone, no way of getting home etc. It was . . . not good.

that sounds like the platonic ideal of a trip to the Kong!

She showed up at my place the next day at 6 am. Another one of our co-workers was passed out on my couch and we just looked at each other like jesus fuck what the hell was that?!

if I'm reading this right, it was the Kong

It was, in fact, the Kong.

"The Kong has your co-worker now."

Oh man I just looked up the Kong on Yelp...

My friend gave me the money to get back in but as I walked past the bar owner I said, "I'll see you in hell." and he kicked me out.

173 reviews...this is gonna be intense.

Dan, is this Kong place some kind of Red Dragon cousin?

not really? Red Dragon really has its own thing going on in terms of "divey place to get shitfaced"

http://www.hongkongboston.com/images/leftwhite_explosion_animate.gif

I thought Red Dragon was all hipstery, or was sometime mid-2000s

the Kong is basically wall-to-wall Harvard students with packs of unwise alums on specific weekends

man I want a Kong Scorpion Bowl now

from yelp, made me lol

Christopher M.
Letting out my inner four-year-old.
Concord, MA
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9/18/2009
By my calculations, I've now consumed (or participated in the consumption of) 1,152 scorpion bowls at the Hong Kong in my lifetime. I have not died. That's 3 stars right there.

omg from their prohibited clothing list for the club"
NO Stocking, Wool, Doorages, Skullcaps &/or Hoos Head Gear

dying here

leave the doorage at home, fellas

hoos head gear

what do they have against hoos?!?

Doo-rage sounds like a form of psychosis.

I was thinking more of the evil bowl drinks. Red Dragon was more OG Minneapolis scenester/record-store people the last time I went, easily 5+ years ago.

yeah, I guess I don't mean hipster disparagingly, just in the scenester-way

from what I remember of Red Dragon (only been their once), their evil drinks were more like mini scorpion bowls for one person, only with the alcohol content of three drinks; the Kong meanwhile will not even sell you a scorpion bowl unless one other person is there to drink it with you (btw drinking a scorpion bowl with only one other person is a RECIPE FOR DISASTER, signed 21-year-old DJP)

ugh there

I think the last time I went to RD, it was with JJJ and FB, so you'd have been there in spirit(s).

from yelp

Drinks: Scorpion Bowl, how many a person have you corrupted with your deceiving tropical goodness? DO NOT get them with the plastic animals, however. Sanitation issue, trust me.

What's yr stance on plastic animals, DJP

ultimately my stance is "they are in alcohol, how unsanitary can they be" but be warned that that is usually formed after an evening of drinking before even getting to the Kong

The plastic animals are the best part!

Well after, you know, the booze.

I have no memory of what bar/party I was at but there's a little plastic dinosaur in my bathroom that I removed from my pocket one alcohol-soaked night

DO get the scorpion bowl with the tiny foam animals that grow in water

Automatic thread bump. This poll is closing tomorrow.

Automatic thread bump. This poll's results are now in.

Dan's got a lot of hunting and slaying to do.

daaaaaaang

where is your god now, DJP

mystifying results

what on earth is round table

lmao

The company slogan for many years has been "The Last Honest Pizza".

so the Ross Perot of pizza then

sad joe's

diarrhea pizza

that giant sucking sound is the sound of your pizza

poll's title was confusing and invalidates the results imo*

(*imo's is a pizza joint in the stl)

Saaaaad turnout for Home Run Inn, there, Chicagoans.

lol did someone already link to that old thread where chaki defends CPK to DJP

also pappa john's is the correct answer

Papa John's, like, 15 years ago is a more correct answer. It's sad how every chain foodery that's halfway decent when it starts out (e.g. Rally's) eventually gets too big for its britches and cuts corners to the point of selling hot garbage.

i want to start a pizza chain called 'hot garbage' and our pitchman will be jim gaffigan singing 'hot garbaaage' sotto voce

otm

great now I'm craving hot garbage

smeared with hot old eggs

washed down with lumpy smelly milk

mmmm

On a hot summer day, when the dumpster swill comes to a simmer and the fermenting weeks-old potato peelings begin to release their tannins, I lean against the urine-rich alley wall with my eyes closed and wait with great anticipation for the moment when the spoiled meat scraps have reached full bloat and I can finally feel that viscous manna drizzling down my throat.

Hot Garbage.

by Calvin Klein

http://i.imgur.com/CvOrC.jpg

what the hell, 10 of you

DJP i know your hatred for CPK well, but is there a thread/post where youve elaborated on why you hate it so much, i'm sure ive seen it i just cant remember

a chicken pizza killed his lover as a young man

I'm sure there is a post, it's not really an interesting story

actually I looked and there isn't really a post, but basically I tried several of their "out there" pizzas (including the thai chicken and the tandoori chicken, and the latter appears to have been taken off the menu) and I found them to be unbearably gross; IIRC there was also some confusion as to whether someone could order a simple pepperoni pizza at the location we went to because everyone wanted one but no one did

that location no longer exists, btw, because it was horribad, but the damage was done and I refuse to eat there now

I have fond memories of pepperoni lovers pizza at the Hut, eaten with an acquaintance who would a few years later slaughter his parents & sister at night in their home. I remember he ate two whole pizzas himself when we ate together. he was executed last year. I just read that his last meal was pizza.

― Euler, Tuesday, November 27, 2012 1:00 PM (2 hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

If you are from Georgia originally, i work with this guy's sister in law.

FYI a pepperoni pizza is available at CPK

i love this thread.

one of the low points of my life was going to cici's pizza hungover with my then-girlfriend who was a militant vegan-i was a vegetarian-but i had recently secretly started eating meat again and i was pathetically trying to not have her ever find out..we were there, she had a cheeseless pizza brought to our table, i pretended that i had to go to the bathroom and proceeded to secretly go back to the buffet line and shove entire pieces of pepperoni pizza in my mouth because i was craving them that hard.

Could not she still have seen you after you got back in line??

naw the booth was out of the buffet eyeline. dont't worry man i had the recon down

i also used to be so poor that i would go to cici's with a backpack lined with plastic bags and would shovel approx 20 slices into it every time i went

an inspiration to dumpster divers everywhere

three people voted Chuck E. Cheese's as the best chain pizza. come, destroyer of worlds, come now

sorry, man. i am a slave to nostalgia. and skee-ball.

well there is potentially fun stuff to do at chuck e. cheese to distract whereas if you are at CPK or pizza hut or w/e you are faced w/ no options but giving your full attention to the disgusting food you are eating xp

seek solace in cheese-filled crusts & soda refills

yeah I do find the "they have video games" argument compelling. look I was too old for Chuck E Cheese by the time they invented it so I'm just bitter let's be honest

you're never too old for chuck e. cheese

plus anyone with a child is gonna be far less creepy they go there on a friday night than when i go there on a friday night

Round Table is probably the best of these, or was in the 80s. I think Strongo is otm though. Let's smoke some fuckin weed and go to Chuck's

― too many encores (underrated aerosmith bootlegs I have owned), Monday, November 26, 2012 10:39 AM (6 days ago)

apparently he's been smoking a little too much

We didn't have a Chuck-E-Cheese where I grew up, but I think Showbiz Pizza later became Chuck E Cheese, and we did have one of those. Had a Horrible memory from youth there.

I loved the Rock-afire Explosion (that Animatronic band they had) but of course being a Child I didn't Totally get that they weren't real. So at my cousin Kevin's birthday party, we were in the Dining area before one of the shows and I walked up to the curtain and opened it to get a look at the band.

My older cousin Donald was there, and he was fairly good at both disguising and throwing his voice. He (according to what he told me years later) saw what I was doing, and planted himself around the corner. At the precise time I opened the curtain, he Said in his best Gorilla voice (with a touch of patois) 'GET OUT OF 'ERE, YOU LEETLE MOTHAFUCKA!', as blithely as possible.

Thinking the singing gorilla had actually said that to me, I ran screaming and crying from the dining area. Oh well. Donald got a pretty hefty punishment from his Mom for that one.

when i was a kid i remember going to a chuck e cheese that had a small doorway under the stage, and you could crawl through it into a tiny cramped room with a strobe light going off, and it gave everyone monstrous shadows and made them look like they were moving in slow motion. for a long time i thought maybe i had made up this memory after a traumatic reading of "there will come soft rains," but googling shows a couple other people remember this too.

Bullwinkle's was the best but I expect only a few cognoscenti remember that since so many people here seem to have missed Round Table. Weirdos who live east of the Sierras need not apply.

Skee-ball and Animatronics was the only rational choice, given the food options.

Chain Pizza/It tastes so good

man you guys eat some garbage

When I took my cousin's dare and snorted coca-cola through a straw until it made me cry, Chuck E. Cheese's was called The ShowBiz Pizza Place.

Chuck E. Cheese bought/merged with the bankrupt Showbiz, iirc

that is correct. technically, my vote for CEC was 60% showbiz

That Rock-a-Fire Explosion documentary is on Netflix still, I think. Enlightening.

yeah it's not a v well-made doc but it kept me interested throughout.

the personalities involved

watching the guy who created the animatronics negging on his wife, who got together with him after being a fan of the show, was something

http://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=The_Rock-afire_Explosion&diff=497734285&oldid=494688868

it must be streaming only. I only do netflix discs ;_;

do a free trial of the streaming service

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uu4e-Rf6zhc

uh, apparently the original dude I mentioned decided to program his first song since 1984 last year

I am speechless

what the hell

most YouTube links itt are dead but:

pop lock and drop it huey bowwow t-pain rockafire showbizpizza showbizpizzaplace music rap remix

O_O YOU GUYS

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BQj9h1kBlR0

I KNOW THIS DUDE BUT DID NOT KNOW ABOUT THIS VIDEO

juxtaposition of bikini women and rock-a-fire explosion makes me feel funny inside

^newborn furry

I wish, it's more of a queasiness... like I just ate some showbiz pizza

I remember the strobe light room too, although it was not under the stage... it was a room with carpeted walls and they'd let a group of kids in there for five minutes at a time. It was like a mosh pit with no music. Extremely violent.

Confirmed: even the microwaveable, single-serving, frozen Home Run Inn pizzas are better than a lot of the other stuff in this poll. Somebody's soul got sold for access to the infernal Home Run recipe.

Taking 4-yr-old son to a CEC birthday party this weekend, I may get a chance to resample the pizza. I will report back.

I took my son to Chuck E. Cheese's for his cousin's birthday party a few years back. Everyone who sampled the pizza came down with diarrhea.

needed more cheese

oh my god the rockafire video Dan posted

I may get a chance to resample the pizza

48 kHz pizza down to 44.1 khz pizza

The only time I went to Showbiz, the Rock-a-Fire Explosion played "Sexy Sadie." Not making this up. I even thought to myself at the time, "No one will believe me when I tell them about this." It was the Bill Murray encounter of chain pizza animatronic band song selections.

Gotta put in my vote for Little Caesar's. Seven bucks. Crazy bread. Ranch sauce! I know you all probably think it's gross, but Little Caesar's sauce is not too sweet and when you get it home you can put pepper and stuff on it.

It's still better than frozen or that homemade shit in a box.

Although, I was way out in the boonies in some small midwest town and the local Little Caesar's wasn't as good. But I think their corner cutting secret is not too much sugar, the fatal flaw of most cheap chains (including Pizza Hut).

http://www.dlisted.com/files/hsotdpizzahutperfumes.jpg

Pizza Hut's new limited-edition Eau de Pizza Hut perfume!

What started out as a joke turned into a real thing. Pizza Hut asked in a haha way on their Facebook page for possible names for a bottle of stank that smells like hot pizza fresh out of the cardboard box. They got over 200 replies and so they decided to make the real thing. They already handed out their entire supply to customers in Canada (Damn you, Canada!), so if you were lucky enough to get a bottle, then you no longer have to rub old slices of pizza all over your asshole, armpits and crotch to smell like Brit's Brit's wet dreams. Pizza Hut actually put out a press release about this mess:

Introducing Pizza Hut Perfume - a brand new fragrance from Pizza Hut Canada boasting top notes of freshly baked, hand-tossed dough.

"When our ad team at GRIP brought the idea to us, we absolutely loved it," says Beverley D'Cruz, Marketing and Product Development Director, Pizza Hut Canada. "What better way to celebrate our Facebook fans than by providing them with a way to enjoy the fresh smell of Pizza Hut pizza whenever they want!"

The limited edition perfume was designed to cc. Only 110 bottles were produced and shared with lucky Facebook fans who won a bottle by being among the first to share their desire for Pizza Hut perfume.

Will we be seeing Pizza Hut perfume in department stores any time soon? According to D'Cruz, only time will tell.

Burger King did this first four years ago when they sold a perfume that smelled like charbroiled cow meat, but this is better. Who wouldn't want to smell like greasy cardboard, microwaved pepperoni, salty desperation, overcooked pieces of sausage and burnt rubber cheese? If you're going to spray yourself down with delicious Eau de Pizza Hut, carry around mace (or a spray bottle full of broccoli water), because Jessica Simpson will try to eat all of you.

Sbarro 8

:-/

Yeah I don't get that either

nabkin dispender

ok i have a report from the field.

i never eat any of these pizzas. tonight a student brought two pizza hut pizzas to share with our class, and i ate a piece.
that was 3 hours ago, i only had one small piece, and i still feel like the pizza is sitting at the top of my digestive tract just kind of hanging out making me miserable.

one piece!

this shit is gross.

Isn't it just "Uno", not "Numero Uno"?

Pizza Hut's pan pizza excellent, others I don't care for.

The little dipping sauces in Papa John's always tempting

Domino's 7
Little Caesar's 6

correct

numero uno is a different chain than uno.

Pizza worked perfectly well before all these weird, toxic "sauces" became A Thing.

Signed, person who puts mayonnaise on any toasted sandwich.

I remember when Red's Savoy, a local pizza shop (now a small midwest chain) with a hyper-loyal customer base changed their sauce, making it sweeter, and everybody rebelled and complained, comparing it to various national chain sauces. I don't think that new sauce lasted longer than a week.

I miss Noble Roman's

The discussion of the Kong drew many looks into my office. Thank you, ilxBoston. Thank you.

Noble Roman's! I'm feeling you, Nino. You could watch them make the pizza. and man were their fingernails dirty.

http://www.nobleromans.com/Images/MonsterwPizza.jpg

yay thanx for nightmares

O_O

WHY ARE HIS EYES TOMATOES

"Noble Roman's" sounds like a seedy 1970's swingers club to me

I keep wanting to call it Roble Noman

Same reason his nose is a zuchinni! (and mouth a . . . sausage?)

what question do you have? his mouth is clearly a pepperoni sausage.

he's holding out the pizza so as to say "take this, all of you, and eat it. For this has my sliced up pepperoni mouth on it, which will be given up for you."

It looked a little too artificial to be a sausage (like it was plastic). What are the teeth then?

Mozzarella cones?

before my last post, I thought to myself, "don't be too cocky about the pepperoni. he might ask you about the teeth." but I was cocky anyway, and here we are. I have no clue what the teeth are. bananas?

they're mushrooms?

And who puts zuchini on a pizza anyway?

teeth are hueg cloves of garlic

who puts zucchini on pizza? this guy!
http://www.examiner.com/images/blog/EXID28360/images/ARCIMB~1.jpg

what's on his neck? whatever it is, it looks like a noble roman's monster tooth

I just checked the menu. Nobel Roman's doesn't put zucchini on anything. The whole monster is a sham.

the original monster didn't have a vegetable face http://www.retrojunk.com/content/commercial/15109/index/

some kid fresh out of college joined the marketing team and thought, "if we subliminally associate vegetables with monsters in our media, the children will riot at their parents' dinner tables and demand our mid-grade cheese pizzas."

my pizza restaurant will be called arcimboldo's

There was also Sergeant Pepperonis

Oh, I wasn't aware that Sergeant Pepperoni has branched out beyond the adult film world. Good for him.

who puts zucchini on pizza? this guy!

bloody disgusting savages!!!

Actually, sliced in ribbons on pizza al tavola, zucchini is OK on pizza! See also eggplant...