POPE TO RESIGN WTF?

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/religion/the-pope/9862194/Pope-Benedict-XVI-to-resign.html

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Papal_resignation

first to resign in NEARLY 600 YEARS omg

The best known example of the resignation of a Pope is that of Pope Celestine V in 1294. After only five months of pontificate, he issued a solemn decree declaring it permissible for a Pope to resign, and then did so himself.

lol

Benedict XVI ‏@Pontifex
We must trust in the mighty power of God’s mercy. We are all sinners, but His grace transforms us and makes us new.

^^24 hrs ago. trans: shit is about to hit the fan?

Making way for Pope Bono I.

should have quit when his priest shuffling scheme was revealed. would not be surprised if another smoking gun is coming out.

Good on him for quitting before he's no longer Popeular...oh wait...

Half expecting to see the headline '85 year old an arrested in connection with Operation Yewtree'.

"...is said to be quitting to devote more time to his family and expanding the chain of popular breakfast restaurant, Eggs Benedict XVI."

Already about a million Ex Benedict jokes on my twitter timeline.

http://mimg.ugo.com/201011/2/5/6/132652/a-team-cylon.jpg

If i hear he's booked a spaceship i'll get worried

Benedict can no longer reliably maintain his human form and has to leave the planet before he turns back into a space lizard in front of thousands at St. Peter's Square.

http://italychronicles.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/05/berlusc.jpg

quitting cos he got offered a role in Star Wars 7
http://i.imgur.com/Fmh1MLI.jpg

Morelike Vatican't amirite

It's sad he was a nazi

They could get John Terry in as a replacement.

sorry this is just how he feels

so many topical twitter oneliners

...most of which are slyly being duplicated here.

first he resigns from the Hitler Youth, now from the papacy--follow-through problems

not really a surprise:

http://articles.washingtonpost.com/2012-04-16/national/35453866_1_german-born-pope-pope-benedict-xvi-john-paul

Talk of possible resignation has been swirling around the pope ever since his 2010 book, “Light of the World,” in which he said that if a pope felt “no longer physically, psychologically, and spiritually capable of carrying out the duties of his office,” he would have “the right, and in some circumstances the obligation, to resign.”

Psychically, surely

Has anyone made a "Nazi Popes Fuck Off" joke yet?

For 1700 years but it wasnt a joke tbf

https://keithroysdon.files.wordpress.com/2012/04/poochie-slide.jpg

Talk of possible resignation has been swirling around the pope ever since his 2010 book, “Light of the World,” in which he said that if a pope felt “no longer physically, psychologically, and spiritually capable of carrying out the duties of his office,” he would have “the right, and in some circumstances the obligation, to resign.”

Pope otm. JPII was clearly well past capable of carrying out his duties for years.

They should maybe think about fast tracking a few young bishops to the top table so they don't have to keep electing guys close to death/senility when the big gig comes up.

Pope on the ropes

#PopeDan2013!

P sure that was a robert jordan joint tbh

xxxp women live longer than men, maybe they should make a woman the next pope.

He should test the shit out infallibility theory btwn now and 28th

"Pope otm." is the single greatest sentence ever written on ILX.

Smoke signals no pope agreement (2005)
As the first smoked emerged it was not clear if it was white or black

So the LAPD shot at it just in case.

serious questions for the church now as they fight to find another man who can stop third world countries using condoms and suppress all reports of priests molesting kids

George Entwistle is probably still available...

between Grammy dresses and this news K-Lo has had a busy 12 hours.

Eh

there's no chance of blair angling for it i spose?

Or rafa

Has K-Lo proposed Paul Ryan as a replacement yet?

impossible to suppress hope that the next one will be completely awesome and liberation-theology-friendly and upright, and then embarrassing to feel that that's just because I want the Church to be good, to be more than good. It's like actively hoping it turns out there's a Santa or something. and yet and yet.

I think it's v understandable to hope for a decent figurehead for a still-powerful organisation tbf

Poscia ch’io v’ebbi alcun riconosciuto,
vidi e conobbi l’ombra di colui
che fece per viltade il gran rifiuto.

AKA he's going down t' pit next time someone gets their act together to go on a poetic trek through the underworld.

Very interesting though. I still think the real surprise was that he ever became pope in the first place. Perhaps after all the years with the CDF he was the only one without secrets.

xp but enough about the BBC...

"actively hoping it turns out there's a Santa or something"

http://newsimg.bbc.co.uk/media/images/41148000/jpg/_41148206_ap_santapope203.jpg

Isn't that John Sergeant?
http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/4/4c/John_Sergeant_2008.jpg/220px-John_Sergeant_2008.jpg

It was noticeable that last time we were down at the VatCit, there were a lot of souvenirs of John Paul 2.

Can't believe it was 2005 that he was appointed. Eight years is actually an average run for a pope.

xp VatCit sounds like a mega city from Judge Dredd.

After he goes they destroy the 8 year old ring.

u guys are on fire, g work

i'd prefer a ritual sacrifice of this bastard

Eh, he'll try his hand at pro baseball for a while, sure, but when that doesn't pan out, he'll be back to being Pope. Just watch.

Eh, he'll try his hand at pro baseball for a while, sure, but when that doesn't pan out, he'll be back to being Pope. Just watch.

Whoops. I blame the Pope.

Some thoughts about potential successors here

If you retire as Pope, do you get your old name back?

Security detail? Parking spot?

lifetime pass to the Knights of Malta picnic

So, how about the Prophecy of Saint Malachy then?

and concluding with the successor of current pope Benedict XVI, a pope described in the prophecy as "Peter the Roman", whose pontificate will end in the destruction of the city of Rome.

http://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Prophecy_of_the_Popes

Uh-oh!

Parking spot?

Those Popemobiles are a bastard to reverse.

We're not on fire yet morbs tbf, but iirc it's firmly predicted for most of us

Fuckin malachy doomsday, they never let a paddy near the top job again

2012 Apocalypse back on, y'all! To the bunkers!

Some odds

xxxp Unless it turns out that Henry VIII had the right idea.

Scherer at 33/1! I'll take me some of that thank you very much

My favorite joke of all time:

The Pope just finished a tour of the East Coast and was taking a limousine to the airport. Since he'd never driven a limo, he asked the chauffeur if he could drive for a while. The reluctant chauffeur pulled over along the roadside, climbed into the back of the limo, and the Pope took the wheel. The Pope then merged onto the highway and accelerated to over 90 mph to see what the limo could do.

Suddenly, the Pope noticed the blue light of the State Patrol in his side mirror, so he pulled over. The trooper approached the limo, peered in through the windows, then said, "Just a moment please, I need to call in."

The trooper called in and explained to the chief that he had a very important person pulled over for speeding. "How do I handle this, chief?" asked the trooper. "Is it the Governor?" questioned the chief. "No! This guy is even more important!"

"Is it the President?" asked the chief.

"No! Even more important!"

"Well, who the heck is it?" screamed the chief.

"I don't know, sir," replied the trooper, "but he's got the Pope as his chauffeur."

should give it to this guy, finally unify the two great papacies.

Make Prince pope - it would stop him making terrible records.
(I know there's a Prince song called 'Pope', I just can't find a YouTube video of it to embed)

really enjoy the way all these insider pope nerds get all macho man sports guy about predicting the next one, and have their brief moment in the rays of the global media

really enjoy the way all these insider pope nerds get all macho man sports guy about predicting the next one, and have their brief moment in the rays of the global media

I can cry thinking about how these guys have to wait years to get their shine

So U can be the President
I'd rather be the Pope
Yeah, U can be the side effect
I'd rather be the dope

Is it too late to beatify Ron Popeil?

Josh in Chicago...a boy in my AS level French class once did a 15 minute version of that joke...CLASSICO.

ten years ago we had Steve jobs, Johnny cash and the pope

now we have no jobs, no cash and no

That was funnier when it was a Bob Hope joke.

dont tell twitter pope rhymes with hope or it will crash the servers

I don't think you understand ten years ago we had Steve jobs, Johnny cash and the pope

now we have no

that's the pope

Adding to the Pope Dan groundswell.

Now we have no

now we have no joke(s)

pope resigns to start new gym called PONTIFLEX

thank u ill be here all night did you also know now we have no jobs, no cash

please don't let dick butkus die

pope superbowl XVI

we should bring back the idea of antipopes. The Antipope could live in the anti-Vatican, a topsy-turvy world where contraception is mandatory and CHILDREN molest ADULTS

I'm here all week.

What the fu..............

a priest walks into a room full of choirboys and points at one. 'that's the only Ben I dicked' he says. the pope resigns

Fingers crossed

http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_Q1anJLkGJVE/TFoojICD2oI/AAAAAAAADE8/fWfCIfNKjJQ/s400/Space_Pope.jpg

10 years ago we had beef lasagna, a pope and no jobs

now we have horse meat, no pope and no jobs

pope resigns to start new gym called PONTIFLEX

He'll be the co-owner with Paul Ryan. It would be a great sitcom.

Take your medication Roman
Take a short vacation Roman
you'll be okaaaay

actually f u guys, I'm taking my game to twitter

http://www.sainsburysentertainment.co.uk/media/ProductImage/largeImage/ProductImage-7517697.jpg

for some reason the pope is named
ben. a hot girl sees the pope and says 'you're the only Ben I Holy See.' the pope resigns and has sex with the hot girl

Did you know the letters of the word "pope" can be rearranged to spell "epop?"

http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_T2RrFtQxw6k/TK6H7FfTufI/AAAAAAAABGw/VJDBeoIlaeQ/s1600/EPOP+%5BOct+09%5D.jpg

Makes you think...

feel like 'the pope resigns' works as a punchline for every joke

dolan pls

No jobs, no cash, no (Ed) Balls...

Om nom nommi padme nom.

-- libcrypt, Monday, 3 September 2007 17:58

lolol

― BIG HOOS aka the steendriver, Thursday, 6 September 2007 17:12 (5 years ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Results 1 - 3 of 3 for Om nom nommi padme nom. (0.23 seconds)

Did you mean: Om nom nom padme nom?

― Mark G, Friday, 7 September 2007 07:48 (5 years ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

My favourite post by me..

Papa om nom nom, papapa om nom nom

I'm hoping for a return to this: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Saeculum_obscurum

I heard Lindsey Graham is going to place a hold on the vote for the new pope until he gets to the bottom of this Benghazi business.

i'm surprised there isn't a special term for this besides 'resignation'

i'm surprised there isn't a special term for this besides 'resignation'

Abdication? Or does that refer specifically to secular monarchs?

"Catholicism to End"

OMG what if it turns out this is because the Pope really DOES smoke dope?

benedictus interruptus

http://sphotos-b.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-snc6/206870_11178335037_4704_n.jpg

never forget

what will be the proper way to refer to benedict after he resigns? will he become Joey Ratzinger again?

"That Nazi that used to be Pope"

Pious ex

His Formerly Holiness

His Ex-Excellency

My papacy is over
What can I say?
My papacy is over
near the end of Febru-ray
I was the pop-uh
But now I'm even more of a joke
I was emperor Palpatine
But now I'm Joseph Ratzinger
And so dear friends
You just have to find someone else to advocate for terrible things
my papacy is over

well I'M gonna call him Joey from the block

xps second favourite to become the next pope is Cardinal Francis Arinze from Nigeria. Black US president meets black Pope would cause all the white supremacists in the world to spontaneously combust...

Hey Joe
Where are you going with that cross in your hand...

Cardinal Frank Ocean.

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/thumb/8/87/Morrissey_crop_tie.jpg/220px-Morrissey_crop_tie.jpg
This is the last Mass I will ever give
No I've changed my mind again
Goodnight, and thank you...

this is amazing:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-rbxov7CVi8

Damn Homie, in the Vatican you was the man, homie
What the fuck happened to you?

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/BC0-fSWCQAEu34n.jpg

Father Ted isn't on that list because of that suspected fraud...
"That money was just resting in my account!"

Man, that is a shitty batting order. Llovera barely managed 85 RBI last season, what's he doing at cleanup?

Bill CLinton for Pope!

Is it Time For A More Progressive Pope?

In an announcement today the Vatican said Pope Benedict XVI would resign as head of the Catholic Church at the end of this month. Pope Benedict XVI took charge of the Catholic Church during difficult times but has stood stedfast with his hard line defence of fundamental Christian values in the face of what he had described as moral decline across much of Europe. Despite this hardline approach and unwavering conservatism during his papacy Catholics have become the most adulterous religious group in the England and Wales according to research conducted by the UK's leading marital dating site IllicitEncounters.com

The number of Catholics actively looking for affairs according to the research done by IllicitEncounters.com was almost twice that of other religious groups. The study showed that 21.5% of the 750,000 members on the extra-marital dating site were Catholic, a shockingly high figure since Roman Catholics make up just 10% of the UK population (YouGov & Cambridge University figures).

A Vatican spokesman said that Pope Benedict XVI has taken the decision to retire "aware of great problems the Church faces today". One of which will undoubtedly be the continuing liberal moral shift, which during the 1960's had driven him to become a theological conservative, taking uncompromising positions on homosexuality, adultery, women priests and contraception.

Spokesperson for IllicitEncounters.com Rosie Freeman-Jones says: “Catholics under Pope Benedict XVI have had a very conservative and uncompromising head of Church, this has had the effect of instilling a sanctity of marriage amongst a generation who are more liberal, leading to a trade off if they become unhappy in the relationship, staying married but having extra-marital affairs.”

It is unclear who will take the papacy after Benedict XVI but a progressive and liberal Pope maybe able to help reunite the Church and kerb the falling numbers of Catholics. As it is clear people are becoming more likely to seek a relationship outside of marriage despite religious condemnation.

^these guys are expert inbox opportunists, as someone in their line of work should be I suppose

That kind of article makes Klo cry.

The Pope goes prog!

"Could the next Pope be slightly more progressive than a former member of the Hitler Youth?"
"Errrrrrrrrrrrrrrmmmm... Can we just pencil that in as a possibly?"

Nobody made the "Ratz deserting a sinking ship" joek yet?

xxp Rick Wakeman for Pope! He's got all the funny clothes already...
http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/8/84/Rickwakemanmoog.jpg/320px-Rickwakemanmoog.jpg

xp Radio DJ: "You just did!"

dolan pls

― goole, Monday, 11 February 2013 08:58 (1 hour ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Knowing nothing about New Yorkers catholicism or popes this is what comes to mind when people talk of a new york pope, from about 1:15 in

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9S4cldkdCjE

papacy was a rolling stone

If you retire as Pope, do you get your old name back?

Seriously, is he going to be just a regular old Joe again?

Will he have any say in who succeeds him? You can't have one pope watching the smoke signals for another, it's just not done.

He's going out on top, I guess. Plenty time now to work on his short game.

He just wants to write in a monastery, apparently, so Il Papa's got a brand new bag.

(old Al Franken joke I think)

Can't wait for Ratz to give the dual victory signs before getting aboard the chopper.

"My mother was a saint... for real, poof!"

haha

Will he have any say in who succeeds him?

saw some speculation somewhere that if he has a terminal condition, quitting now gives him some say-so over his successor - something that obviously wouldn't be possible if he died while still Pope.

have no idea re the accuracy of this theory

FOX and Coca-Cola Present: AMERICAN PONTIFF

Does he get to keep a hat? So that when people come over to visit he can be all, and that is a baseball signed by Tug McGraw, and there is a picture of me as a Nazi kid, there's me with Beyonce and Bono, that is a hat from when I was Pope, and over there is the ...

Between conclaves the Vatican experts speculate on which cardinals are on steroids.

Cokie Roberts (whose mother was envoy to the Vatican) explaining the timing this morning: "Easter is coming up, which is exhausting."

(I have a picture signed by Tug McGraw, plz vote me for pope)

man what if popes not dying in office becomes a thing now

"bill put in 8 years and now he's having the time of his life, this is bullshit, peace"

It's a last ditch effort to seem revolutionary after years of conservatism.
"Yes, I took a trad stance on homosexuality, women in the preisthood, and contraception. But I resigned before I became incapable of doing the job, which will put me in the history books as a radical!"

can one of you guys read over my resumé?

so many catholic churches are cloaing in new england .. and now THIS - they need a celebrity razamataz Pope, not Rattyburger ! Ice Cube for Pope!

xp You have to at least call it a curriculum vitae - I heard a rumour that the Catholic church is big on using Latin.

http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-WvBMMnhz4to/T3v4PTi74rI/AAAAAAAAAmc/Hkc69ig2YJU/s1600/ratzenbergerx%5B1%5D.jpg

saw some speculation somewhere that if he has a terminal condition, quitting now gives him some say-so over his successor - something that obviously wouldn't be possible if he died while still Pope.

I wonder how many sure-thing votes he has lined-up for another hardliner are turning 80 (and non-eligible for voting) in the next year or two. I think PB16 could be pulling a Trent Lott here, getting out before new rules go into effect.

How many hardliners are turning 80 in the next few years, God, that first sentence.

gotta be weird being infallible one day and fallible the next

something that obviously wouldn't be possible if he died while still Pope

AND WHY NOT?

at 11:59:55 pm on February 28, he will waddle over to the top of the staircase and leap as high and far as he can (1 inch vertical, 2 inches lateral) over the precipice. he will float by the grace of god for 5 seconds. At midnight, March 1st he will tumble down the staircase and die

traditionally, this is how popes who resign pass the torch, so to speak

oooh, and all of his potential successors will be on the staircase. so whoever survives the tumbling Benedict and makes it to the top becomes the next pope

pay per view

mook, the Pope is only infallible IN MATTERS OF FAITH, u heretic.

televised kingmaking is the reason why we want a progressive church right

Don't you guys mess with me on doctrine, I am a former Parvuli Dei medal winner.

http://www.scoutingbsa.org/programs/Awards/Religious_Emblems/Catholic/Parvuli_Dei.html

xxxp more like pray per view...

Resign in Blood

my guess is that when louisville-notre dame went to the fifth ot on saturday, ol' joey r. was like 'i'll do whatever you want, god, just let the irish win'

Real talk: Maybe he has been diagnosed with Alzheimer's?

there's some real da vinchi code shit in all this

yes there is a pope

does the pope shit in the woods?

His art is poping. He's about to saint his mass release.

Feel sorry for everyone who had this bumper sticker:

http://farm1.static.flickr.com/10/12674891_805af0d00c_o.jpg

dog's representative on earth

I wonder if anyone has ever speculated on the sanctity of saints/popes shit

Poop Benedict XVI

All the taints and fartyrs and our messed pope

Fender should start a new range: Relic'd Relics.

tagline: "You can't polish a turd, but you can relic it (in glitter)"

The Papal Gall Bladder is Unholy

The Pope is retiring . . . I did Nazi that coming.

STEPHEN COLBERT FOR POPEBERT!

I'm disappointed in the ratio of Nazi/Inquisition jokes about Benny.

Nazi to Inquisition

Nobody expects the Nazi Inquisition!

No one expects a Papal resignation?

Gonna get a curry this evening. Habeas Pappadum.

So, how about the Prophecy of Saint Malachy then?

and concluding with the successor of current pope Benedict XVI, a pope described in the prophecy as "Peter the Roman", whose pontificate will end in the destruction of the city of Rome.
http://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Prophecy_of_the_Popes

Uh-oh!

― you're going home in a crispy ambulance (cajunsunday), Monday, February 11, 2013 7:50 AM (7 hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

I was going to mention Malachy. We're fucked!

"112 Peter the Roman, who will nourish the sheep in many tribulations; when they are finished, the city of seven hills will be destroyed, and the dreadful judge will judge his people. The end."

pretty sure malachy is talking about this city

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Seven_Hills,_Ohio

I almost did that, brownie, but I resisted the temptation. Although ilxors might enjoy reading about their crazy ex-mayor.

"The Vatican said Benedict would live in a congregation for cloistered nuns inside the Vatican, although he will be free to go in and out. Much of this is unchartered territory. The Vatican's chief spokesman, the Rev. Federico Lombardi, said he isn't even sure of Benedict's title — perhaps "pope emeritus.""

lots of in and out with the nuns - nice

perhaps "lucky bastard"

i think they should declare him legally dead and treat him as an unhappy spirit that has to be propitiated

I bet he has a "heart attack" at vespers tonite

http://img96.imageshack.us/img96/7310/popeschnook.jpg

This whole thread and no one made a "pope out" joke?

http://ecx.images-amazon.com/images/I/418632EVDZL._SL500_AA300_.jpg
"Pope-ed In, Souled Out"

FIrst Panel: Cardinal and Nun crying over Benedict being gone.

Second Panel: Pan out, Benedict is beside them, crying too. Offers them both a tissue.

Third Panel: Cardinal and Nun shocked out of their wits. Red cap flipping over, Nun's tongue going all zig-zaggy.

Fourth Panel: White smoke comes out of chimney. Benedict's face appears over it. He is laughing maniacally.

apparently an in-law of mine just appeared on NBC News re this topic. He's in the religion field.

Kind of suprised a pope can just go "fuckit I dont wanna be pope anymore this sucks". Thought it would be like being a queen or something and you Just Have to Do It.

I thought it would be like being a capo in the Bonanno Family

he'd be Pope Emeritus VI btw

Itv covered the leading vatican figures earlier, omg the scorsese vibes off've them. Cardinal louie 'red lou' bagnetti, rose from monsignor of a small town in siena after a successful 'hit' on a rival synagogue etc

like being a queen or something and you Just Have to Do It

kings can get out of this by marrying sketchy americans iirc

pretty sure a Pope could do this too

good point

http://i.imgur.com/aN0Ink9.gif

Guys, my gf resigned her Costco post today. Where's her thread?

Is that gif of a priest or a guy at a Bieber concert?

what a horribly formed "pope"

He will doubtless be placed between two perfectly formed popes

resultant pope

In the vatican basement are loads of dead popes' sacophagai..

Presumably there will be a 'watch this space' wrt this one...

does he get a buy-out option on the company car y/n?

Are there any good conspiracy theories about this circulating already? Like, maybe he's already dead and the cardinals made up this resignation thing for some reason? Or maybe he resigned so some awful truth about him would never come to light? Or the real reason for the resignation is he wants to fly back to his home planet?

I want to read some entertaining stuff like this, can you find anything?

Perhaps you could read your own post a few times.

Lightning strikes St Peter's Basilica as Pope resigns

(need to change yr display name to Dead Pope storage)

Are there any good conspiracy theories about this circulating already? Like, maybe he's already dead and the cardinals made up this resignation thing for some reason? Or maybe he resigned so some awful truth about him would never come to light? Or the real reason for the resignation is he wants to fly back to his home planet?

I want to read some entertaining stuff like this, can you find anything?

Have you tried making a time-machine and travelling back to school when you're 12?

Oh come on, I can't be the only one who's entertained by silly conspiracy theories?

Maybe you are.... and maybe that's the interesting thing....

And I don't mean stuff that anyone can come up with in a minute, I mean the more obsessive stuff with details and all. Like when this pope was elected, someone posted a link to ILX about a conspiracy theory that depicted how John Paul I (the pope who died in 1978 only 33 days into his papacy) was actually killed because he was a secret liberal, and wanted to change the Catholic Church. That sort of stuff.

(xpost)

Can anyone who remembers the John Paul I theory repost the link, btw? I can't find it anymore.

Should see you right

Ah well, you get the idea.

Yeah, I tried to google it, but all I found were theories relating to the Freemasons and/or the Mafia. The article I remember reading suggested the Pope was murdered by cardinals once they found out he was planning to propose some radical changes to Church policies (mostly regarding contraception and the position of women). This article says the idea of John Paul I as a secret radical wasn't really true, but it doesn't mention any conspiracy theory that he was killed because of it.

here's one for you, Tuomas: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Prophecy_of_the_Popes

I think the standard conspiracy for John Paul I is that he was murdered partly because he was liberalising, but also because he wanted to clean up the vatican bank (which does involve the mafia). David Yallop is the big proponent:
http://www.big3news.net/2012/03/04/british-author-claims-honest-reforming-pope-john-paul-i-murdered-in-1978-for-beliefs-on-vatican-wealth-artificial-birth-control/
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/culture/books/3665202/An-outbreak-of-anti-popery.html

(didn't thoroughly check those links, sry if they go to mad evil catholic sites)

(or The Telegraph)

here's one for you, Tuomas: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Prophecy_of_the_Popes

Yeah, I read that one, but it's a bit too vague and supernatural for my tastes.

Heh, you know of some sane catholic sites?

An outbreak of anti-popery

That's like the opposite of potpourri. Anti-popery sits in a decorative bowl on the sideboard and removes the smell of potpourri from the room.

It does provide some laughs at the way people try to make the each line fit the Pope whose reign it supposedly predicts:

Animal rurale.
Country animal

Benedict XIV (1740–1758)

Might be a play on words because of his famous laws about missions in the two papal bulls'‘.

Canis & coluber.
Dog and adder

Leo XII (1823–1829)

"Dog" and "snake" are common insults, and Leo was widely hated[citation needed]. The legend could be an allusion to the pope's last name, Sermattei. "Serpente" is the Italian word for snake.

People actually believe this "proves" the prediction is accurate?!

(xxpost)

I can't wait for the Pope themed XXX pron parodies.

Sinead thanks Ratz

http://www.hollywoodreporter.com/earshot/sinead-oconnor-pope-benedicts-greatest-420477

On a semi-related note, I just listened to this last night: dramatic readings of Sinead's rather lurid posts about her sex life and colorful mix of euphemisms for anal sex

http://thefpl.us/index.php?option=com_content&view=article&id=106:episode-62-the-private-language-of-sinead-oconnor

what will be the proper way to refer to benedict after he resigns?

His Excellency The Nope

http://www.postalmuseum.si.edu/rfdmarketing/images/Pope-motorcycle.jpg

Dear Pope Mfg Co.,

We wish to order 1 Pope for all-'round use.

Yours sincerely,

The Vatican

The Mfg Pope Co

holy christ:

kathrynlopez profile

kathrynlopez I just realized I'm never going to hear Pope Benedict XVI say "Alleluia" again, in his gentle German fatherly voice. #Lent 55 minutes ago · reply · retweet · favorite

k lo really needs an intervention

get a youtube, k-ster

or pope up yr teddy ruxpin

^ not a euphemism btw

I'm never going to hear Pope Benedict XVI say "Alleluia" again

p sure there'll be youtubes
lol xp

I think a motorcycle could actually do the Popes job for the most part if it had a waving hand

I'm never going to hear Pope Benedict XVI say "Alleluia" again

Him and Jeff Buckley, what a shame.

we will also never hear Benedict sing "Eternal Life" ever again

http://ww1.hdnux.com/photos/17/77/77/4194288/3/628x471.jpg

in his gentle German fatherly voice
in his gentle German fatherly voice
in his gentle German fatherly voice
in his gentle German fatherly voice
in his gentle German fatherly voice
http://kopjik.files.wordpress.com/2010/01/paven-i-hitlerjugend.jpg

Pareene's last bit about her had the great and perceptive line about how she only seemed happy when she was at Mass

That must be the Mass Effect...

I love Hanle y Deus and I wish to make him the new Pope of LUUUUUURVE.
― Ned Raggett (Ned), Friday, April 18, 2003 8:30 PM (9 years ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

batts eyes

ahem

http://m.guardiannews.com/world/2013/feb/21/pope-retired-amid-gay-bishop-blackmail-inquiry

hearsay, i say

guardian rerunning stuff from repubblica, eh

Haven't seen this elsewhere on ILX, but it seems relevant to put it here in light of the Guardian piece from Saturday:

Britain's most senior Roman Catholic cleric, Cardinal Keith O'Brien, is stepping down as leader of the Scottish Catholic Church.

He had been accused of inappropriate behaviour towards priests dating back to the 1980s.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-21572724

Good riddance

Yet another rampant homophobe turns out to enjoy sex with men. What a shocker!

It's great that for the 'Gay Bishop' story the photo is of one of the (admittedly colourful) Swiss Guards.

^ was thinking the same thing.

the vatican is simply aflutter w rumors

Desk cleared, tweets deleted

http://www.theatlanticwire.com/technology/2013/02/vatican-just-deleted-all-pope-benedicts-tweets/62640/

Charles E Pierce: "If he has a sense of humor, he'll move to Avignon."

can't bleeve he didnt do the Nixon double-V from the copter

Great minds...

Can't wait for Ratz to give the dual victory signs before getting aboard the chopper.

― pplains, Monday, February 11, 2013 9:31 AM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

hivemind

conclavemind

Matt Sussman ‏@suss2hyphens
It's something Benedictable, but in the end is right ♫ I Pope you had the time of your life

LOL that is amazing!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0YzL5M3thzs

Weird Al really needs to get to work.

lol http://www.nydailynews.com/news/world/fake-bishop-sneaks-vatican-article-1.1278885#ixzz2MbHqP3C5

I will say that I've been enjoying the recent eps of the Bugle podcast for all the pope joke material they've been given

my Jesuit in-law stopped by, before heading to Rome! He's been doing interviews all week, and to conspiracy theories re the resignation his answer is "You're giving these people too much credit; there's a reason they're not in control of what's going on."

'are you giving these people too much credit' should always be the first question when examining conspiracy theories

wait is he a cardinal??

no, a journalist (AND a clergyman). So, not voting.

Morbs next time he checks in w/ you please ask him if the Jesuits are going to schism anytime soon, I've long been intrigued by this possibility

it's goin down TUESDAY

conclave, not schism.

Okay we got one.

Habemas Dr. Morbiem

Thank christ ive not sinned for weeks

damn – was hoping the smoke was the room on fire with all those heretics

eagerly awaiting to find out which one of these people i know nothing about will fill this post i despise

pretty quick work, so maybe he's just another placeholder pope to throw pies at while the sex scandals keep bubbling up to the surface.

Pope Bozo

"Ladies and gentlemen...your new Apostolic Father...SCOTT BROWN!"

no one told me there would be pie

when vote pope bring etc

Pope Pie is one i could approve of.

sadly, it isn't me

SCHISM

BOSTONIAN CAPTIVITY

give the new pope his own thread

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Saeculum_obscurum

Fine, I'll start the "Pope Dude" thread.

Really want it to be the Canadian so we can finally have a Pope Gordon.

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/BC2XaIYCUAAK8jj.jpg

"Habemus Papam" - we have a Pope.

that would be amazing

Pope Bootylicix I

Wouldn't convert for Pope Beyonce, but would watch the show.

Pope KLo

pope pope in the attic

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v212/etienne_saint/ScreenShot2013-03-13at120344PM_zpsbb21a94f.png

http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m6yv453q831qzbj7zo1_500.jpg

http://radiofreemidwich.files.wordpress.com/2012/05/ecstatic-crowd-of-dronesters-gathers-outside-fat-cats.jpg?w=470&h=267

can't he wave or something?
awwwwwwkward

At least this one isn't a robot. He actually SMILES when talking and cracks jokes at his inauguration. And he chose FRANCIS! I would have preferred it was after our St of Assisi rather than a Jesuit trying to convert 16th century Asia, but its still a great name.

Also, discovered this today:

http://www.catholic.org/ae/movies/review.php?id=36999

"The Blues Brothers," a 1980 comedy starring the late John Belushi and Dan Aykroyd features a mean, fire-breathing nun played by Kathleen Freeman. In the film, Belushi and Aykroyd's characters Jake and Elwood say "they're on a mission from God" to raise funds for an orphanage, but otherwise "The Blues Brothers" has no overt spiritual content. Despite this, the Vatican hails the film a "Catholic classic," and recommends the movie to Catholics worldwide.

Did Catholicism get fun while I wasn't looking???

No

I would have preferred it was after our St of Assisi

didnt they confirm it's after Assisi?

The live feed I was watching had someone mention it was the Jesuit. I hope it is Assisi

Now that Benedict has retired to seclusion, will the papparazzi stalk him? Will italian newspapers bribe nuns to get the inside scoop on his living arrangements? Will he mortify his flesh? Will they burn his old pope clothes? Does he get to keep his same bed? I expect People magazine to keep me posted!

http://i.imgur.com/YVABuwM.jpg

creepy

Pope eaten by wolves... refuses to step down

pack of wolves in miters now heads catholic church

POPE TO WOLVES WTF?

Balloon boy

Can't wait for Ratz to give the dual victory signs before getting aboard the chopper.

― pplains, Monday, February 11, 2013 9:31 AM

"My mother was a saint... for real, poof!"

― saltwater incursion (Dr Morbius), Monday, February 11, 2013 9:31 AM

<3