Toast Poll

yeah i got bored even just typing it out but face it anything other than the cold option is a red herring, deal

voting "while hot, golden" but i'm not hardline about white bread tbh

i find slathering more butter on top deals with the melting ish

yes yes but i mean that's hardly just a toast issue and i haven't all day man

note i have all day obv i mean look at the poll i just started

i was gonna start a poll about "do you prefer to read the book first or see the film first" so i'm feeling you on these key issues

not a big fan of cold toast i've got to admit

feel free, i suppose, to elaborate on yr alternatives to white bread or to introduce a finer grading system of carbon crusting or temperature w/e below the line, once i have the headline censored idgaf really

i will be requesting a threadban for anyone protesting butter tho, fair warning. arsheesh notm.

xp ya but i took today off to code an array of 10,000 non-repeating numbers and suchlike

but, and this is v much a blue saturday xover i think, the thought of writing a simple but useless program that does the same thing as the other twenty ppl in the class that will not in any way approach an already-existing most efficient way of solving this non-problem let alone address the inherent ridiculousness of repetition by humans of these simple logical steps when we invented the alu to do just this type of thing well i mean i just spent the morning making toast

i vex my lecturers in class discussions and have incited more than one revolt form nothing but sheer malevolent whimsy

dude that is one of the key things that makes me give up learning programming right at the start even tho i think it wd be fun

also i am having toast when i get home

ok well let us know

ps it is fun but yknow this is a task with a set deadline and well you know

I voted wrong! I meant to choose Butter while hot (real butter, white bread, toast that shit just golden, yeeeahhh)but I hit the first option instead. Just saying in case it's a close call.

"golden" is definitely the optimum toasting level, maybe a decent wholemeal/granary can't achieve said colour but i think it can reach the same level

hot, golden, yeeeahhh

ha ok who's fb friends with me cos that wording now looks less than unintentional one a couple of levels

Man, I think I am the polar opposite to you on this toast issue. Butter while hot - some kind of margarine type spread - brown bread - toast dark.

Also Marmite.

Have never had toast

Fuck that white people shit

takes all sort emil.y, all sorts of depraved and evil types obv but nevertheless

shit did i forget to put the 'wites only' tag on this thread? shit, can't reasonably call jjj to do a threadban based on race can i

can i?

might mail him.

Using a toaster is way overrated. Soften the butter, butter the cold bread, grill it in a pan on the stove. Bread gets hotter and you've got better brownness control.

when americans say 'grill' i dont know what they mean but it surely cant be grill

makes u wonder what else hilarious or confusing misunderstandings you could have online with americans, rly

it's almost as if there were two nations divided by a common tongue - Bob Marley

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Grilling#Flattop_grilling

For whatever reason, there are times when you just can't go out back to grill. It's these times when you need to know the basics of broiling in your oven. There are similarities and differences that can make your broiling successful. Many recipes give instructions on the use of a broiler as an alternative to grilling, but they just don't explain the fundamental differences that you need to know.

^ no fuck it repeal whatever and invade these sick fucks all over again, we'll help this time

'broil' has the ring of a word invented when a small colony of ppl arrive ashore and they person they consult on matters linguistic if doubt arises is a chancer of the highest order

to be honest, I have never known what to call it when I melt butter on bread in a pan, but it's not the same thing as toast.

it's FRY ffs FRY you are FRYING that's a TIP

i feel like i'm talking to crazy ppl here but i mean it's calming me to realise that i am in fact talking to crazy ppl

well, we didn't all go to fancy cooking school like you.

"grill" as in "grilled cheese sandwich," i.e., butter side down in a hot flat pan. OK, frying.

yeah, I just didn't think it was frying if you applied it to bread.

is that a grammatical or a culinary rule, and either way why on earth

no wonder my broiled steaks are turning out less than great

So you can't makes toast OR steaks right? Dang, son.

Wait, my mind is being blown... a grilled cheese sandwich is actually fried?

i had figured this out somewhat after numerous HOOSian updates but i think that i recoiled from full implications, yknow?

and may god have mercy on my soul

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WJmKStqugMc

I eat toast dry.

you have yr option, feel free to use it and by god dont let sunset see you in this thread or else

Wait, my mind is being blown... a grilled cheese sandwich is actually fried?

first found this out when looking up grilled cheese recipes and yeah my mind went moebius too

currently dipping warm buttery toast into a bowl of Scotch Broth btw

ya i'll gonna have another slice i think

onto the hot cross buns now

butter on hot golden toast

anything else is incomprehensible to me

butter while hot - but spread sparingly, toasted to golden or slightly darker

a grilled cheese sandwich is actually fried?

haha what

The weird thing is that grilling as in actually grilling with a grill is a good way to make toast

How do you make yours? xp

"i like baked potatoes. Baking, that's when you immerse something in very hot water over a stove, right?"

^this is you right now, America, afaict

just thinking yesterday how much i miss 'toasties' - i.e. a toasted sandwich filled with things like cheese or ham or egg or all three, with SEALED EDGES so shit doesn't fall out

http://img299.imageshack.us/img299/3116/sandwich20maker.jpg

voted other: grainy bread toasted well-golden/super crunchy, cooled but not cold before spreading butter

toasted sandwich makers are great for five minutes then you can't fit them in the cupboard next to the unused George Foreman grill

xxxp I have no problem with any method of melting cheese over bread, I like to make quesadillas in a pan, my thing is basically just if you call grilling frying what the hell do you call frying (don't answer that I'm not sure I'm ready to know)

Uh I mean if you call frying grilling

God I'm confused

But how do you make a grilled cheese sandwich?

Using a grill

I have never made a fried cheese sandwich but the idea is not unappealing

i have made the following cheese sandwiches

grilled (proper grilled like)
fried (these are good too)
microwaved (i do not recommend)

xps i don't own one myself, but we had one growing up and it got used almost weekly

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NoVbnv01Qek

grilled (proper grilled like)

Still trying to understand what equipment and method this involves east of the Atlantic. Is there any fat (butter/margarine/oil) applied to the outward facing side of the bread? If not, does the bread not scorch?

I remember when dubbed Iron Chef episodes came over here and they used "grilled" when they meant "baked." Fucking English language!

WmC, grilling in UK & australia etc == cooking under heat ie broiling

a 'grill' for all intents and purposes is a broiler

even though I really hate even saying the word broil because it is super ridiculous

As darragh alluded to above, you guys use the word broil, a word nobody else has ever had need for. So, uh, a broiler? Which doesn't touch the surface of the bread.

Xp!

'grill' can still also refer to a charcoal or gas grill like a barbecue type situation, depending on the kind of food

but a "grilled cheese sandwich" would most commonly be broiled or made in a sandwich maker

fin

TY, VG -- another culture chasm bridged.

welcome!

You guys are calling American grilled cheese "fried" when it's not - frying involves immersion in oil. If anything, they're sauteed.

I think.

(just checked and apparently sauteeing is considered a kind of frying, but that seems wrong)

we wd distinguish between "deep frying" (immersion) and "shallow frying" (like sauteeing basically) but if there's a pan and hot fat of some kind it's frying in our parlance

anyway i made grilled cheeses tonight and calling them fried cheeses wd feel wrong so

http://i.imgur.com/h7k6lou.jpg

Have never had toast

Fuck that white people shit

― 龜, Tuesday, March 4, 2014 2:22 PM (8 hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Milk_toast#Milk_toast_in_Asia

Of course, bread and cheese under the broiler is called toasted cheese, just to make things more interesting.

here, if you fry bread it is called "fried bread" and is distinct from toast

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fried_bread

Automatic thread bump. This poll is closing tomorrow.

Ugh white bread is so gross, just straight in my "not even food" category right away.

the answer is plugra butter on a fresh pullman loaf straight out of the oven.

Cant get behind whiteshaming itt tbrr

Why would you want to eat cold toast??

toast made with brown bread is superior.

voted "french"

The real question is whether we eat it with the butter-side up or butter-side down.

real butter, unsalted. Butter while hot obviously, the toast should absorb the butter, the butter should not just be on top. The bread should be toasted to whatever the brown equivalent of golden is.

butter-side down

WAHT

P sure that was jokes

yooks are not zooks, keep your butter-side up

I haven't had butter or white bread in my domicile in eons.

unsalted butter on bread sounds like kind of a bummer to me but I loooooooooooove salted melty butter

I'm not a huge butter fan, but unsalted butter is awful. It just causes me to salt the food more than I already do, which quite a bit. Salt your butter people.

Plugra butter is so fantastic, even unsalted is great on toast. If the bread is good, it should bring enough salt.

option 2, non butter users i am so sad for u

don't typically use butter, and i try to have really fresh bread that doesn't need toasting. what is toasting if not an attempt to revive shit bread? if toasting is required, golden brown plz.

Jeff OTM. Even plugra needs salt.

I was at a fancy steakhouse last week where bread came w/ unsalted butter topped with ground salt. That was the best.

Hunter not OTM. Toast is its own thing, not a requirement.

Yea fresh bread makes better toast but toast is better than bread

I just had to make claws at Kenny the visiting dog to prevent him getting too close to my freshly buttered golden-toasted organic baguette.

Grilled cheese sandwiches - 'grilled' might be a US corruption of 'griddled' BTW - do not involve buttering the bread before laying the butter side down in a big pan. The butter is melted in the pan/on a diner-style grill or griddle while you prepare the two slices of bread which will form your sandwich. I prepare the 'cheese side' by spreading a thin layer of Dijon mustard on the bread to help the shredded cheddar adhere to the surface. When the butter in the pan is bubbling, place the slices in the pan (cheese side up, if you're a moron that needs it spelling out) for 60-90 seconds. Flip one slice over onto the other after the cheese has melted, then lift the whole thing out of the pan and onto a cutting board where you can slice it on the diagonal, and then... bon appetit.

Here endeth the lesson.

buttering the bread before laying the butter side down in a big pan

what kind of savagery is this?

Someone mentioned the possibility upthread and my entire being just went ¡NO PASARAN!

Buttering the bread rather than the pan was a huge revelation for me b/c it meant the butter is distributed more evenly on the bread (no pooling/dry spots) and you can control the amount of butter. What's the advantage of melting the butter in the pan method?

I would say that the butter is distributed more evenly on the bread...

gtfo toast thread

Buttering bread pre-griddle is very effective and yummy.

Hunt3r finds his way back to the money.

wtf this thread. I have never ever made a grilled cheese sandwich by melting the butter in the pan, only by spreading it directly onto my slices of bread -- everyone I know does it this way?!

also white bread, WHY??? you might as well just eat a sponge.

toast made with brown bread is superior. real butter, unsalted. Butter while hot obviously, the toast should absorb the butter, the butter should not just be on top. The bread should be toasted to whatever the brown equivalent of golden is.

― silverfish, Wednesday, March 5, 2014 2:53 PM (7 hours ago)

silverfish is my kind of toast man/woman.

i would totally eat a sponge if it were made out of white bread and then toasted

i mean to address the rhetorical question

because, right, when you toast white bread the texture (particularly on the outside) becomes this wondrous sawdust crunch martian crust landscape varying from the merest golden blush to a deep and woody bark the biting into of which returns a deeply satisfying crunch which then yields (depending on thickness of slice but just for sheer ya-im-fucking-owning-this let's assume the dirtiest most basic white sliced pan you can get here because like here's the thing fuck snobbery over toast if you're snobby over toast you are missing the basic point of toast which is that it is a slice of 5p stuff that goes in a fucking toaster for a short length of time and emerges as a hans christian andersen cartridge of awesome) into a central core of lesser crunch- ranging to chewy but hey what's not to like there- and get this, right, YOU GET TO PUT BUTTER ON IT TOO

that's why white bread why. have another type of bread if you like, but don't white bread why me like this is a deniable thing because no

i mean i even gave you ingrates a vote but there's just no stopping yis whinging

You make a convincing case, actually.

i care deeply about the culinary outputs achievable with easi-singles, a 40p loaf and a bag of glucose, blame my upbringing

you might as well eat a https://encrypted-tbn1.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcR9M1ihXq5OnKZyS4FqGdYPjfE4W8xxa5MWUJybEh7L50s_ra7uUg

alright alright. your toast essay makes me feel bad for insulting your toast choices. sorry :(

damn skippy

thank you dmac for your eloquent defense of white bread

HOLD YOUR HEADS HIGH, WHITE BREAD LOVERS

use yr fancy breads for sandwiches you hippies, best toast will always and ever be white bread forever amen

because, right, when you toast white bread the texture (particularly on the outside) becomes this wondrous sawdust crunch martian crust landscape varying from the merest golden blush to a deep and woody bark the biting into of which returns a deeply satisfying crunch which then yields (depending on thickness of slice but just for sheer ya-im-fucking-owning-this let's assume the dirtiest most basic white sliced pan you can get here because like here's the thing fuck snobbery over toast if you're snobby over toast you are missing the basic point of toast which is that it is a slice of 5p stuff that goes in a fucking toaster for a short length of time and emerges as a hans christian andersen cartridge of awesome) into a central core of lesser crunch- ranging to chewy but hey what's not to like there- and get this, right, YOU GET TO PUT BUTTER ON IT TOO

Especially great when using this stuff

http://www.holsumaz.com/minicms/uploads/200808030920030.AHTT.jpg

I made fake Texas toast for my kids after cooking their eggs a few weeks ago, it is now requested every time a skillet hits the stove.

http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-bcxz2HpWJOI/T0fs8Zo_XuI/AAAAAAAAELM/jUr4e1e6BCw/s1600/Calvin+&+Hobbes+Toast.jpg

Automatic thread bump. This poll's results are now in.

Acceptable

I just searched for a thread on toast cos I had toast and idnr starting this

I did FP a few posts again tho

Jesus tho, toast, eh

idg the white-bread haters itt -- what do you sop up your bbq sauce with? also, a pan de mie fresh out of the oven is a lovely thing.

pain de mie even.

Just received notice my FP count went up by one

my conscience is clear

The Guardian weighs in...

http://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2014/dec/09/how-to-eat-toast

Is the Guardian worse than it used to be?

I don't know for sure but if Irish white bread is similar to what in Scotland is called 'plain bread' then DM's enthusiasm for it is entirely justified.

Just had some now, without butter, with parfait and salt and pepper

I'm enjoying this because now I'm the dark horse of the thread and I've never, ever been the dark horse of an ILX thread before

ugh, tony naylor, how, why

'broil' has the ring of a word invented when a small colony of ppl arrive ashore and they person they consult on matters linguistic if doubt arises is a chancer of the highest order

― CSI BONO (darraghmac), Tuesday, March 4, 2014 3:05 PM (9 months ago)

dmac's most important contribution to ilx

Cold toast? "So the butter doesn't melt"?? What's the point of any of that.

so help me je55e I'm doing p well avoiding ilx but don't test me

that right there is a really big article about toast

http://veggies.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/2012/12/warb_fruit_orange.jpg

this is nice toasted & buttered

Y

It is but their bread is garbage as a rule.

bread is so-so, fruit loaf is hell y

got to stay off these threads, it's pissing down outside and i am not decocooning no matter how much my taste buds want stuff

It is but their bread is garbage as a rule.

― Anyway, it's not a three, it's a yogh. (Tom D.), Saturday, December 12, 2015 11:53 AM (13 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

it was actually the co-op equivalent that prompted my post but the only image I could find was lol tiny

http://www.bloomberg.com/news/articles/2016-07-03/meet-balmuda-the-230-toaster-from-japan

m&s high bran bread, avocado oil spread in place of butter: turns out not even a health kick can ruin toast

Cold toast? "So the butter doesn't melt"?? What's the point of any of that.

― Je55e, Wednesday, December 10, 2014 3:28 PM (two years ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

^this is an otm post btw and it's kinda amazing how much time passed before anyone commented on this absolute lunacy

bc its dmac taking the piss

its like pouring the milk then the cereal

i believe i countered it with my first post tbh

i am so having marmite and toast for supper

NB: the main reason supermarket white bread from a commercial bakery toasts up such an even golden brown is that it is formulated with a higher sugar content which helps increase its shelf life. Toasting, for example, a traditional baguette just cannot compete in that department. Different beasts.

used to love lightly toasted slices of baguette when I was a kid

But, despite tasting delicious, I'm pretty sure those baguette slices never achieved a perfectly even golden brown.

Oh yeah you're right

Fuckit having more toast

toasters seem like they are a lot shittier now

like the bread browns too fast & the insides just steam so the toast gets soft right away when you spread butter etc... but if you turn up the heat it burns

yeah, plus my toaster doesn't even fit a full slice of most loaves - i know the obvious solution but i'm not made of money

My insistence on cooling the toast so that the butter doesn't melt in is sincere and one of my only irl foibles

I make a triangle of the slices to cool them the quicker.

It's because uniformity of butter or any comestible lubricant is not just boring but an actual travesty. Getting more than the fair share of the heartstopping stuff in any given bite is like a second Sunday in the week.

Not to mention that to make the toast soggy by melting yr butter on the hot surface is a desperate choice. Be reassured that I find your decision to do so as wrongheaded as you seem to view my methods, but I forego the self-indulgent urge to label you pisstakers on the back of it. For shame.

staggering tbh

xp

does cold toast vs dmac using nuclear butter look like hiroshima post a-bomb

Cold toast is more like t-bomb tbrwu

I'm glad we finally talked more about this. For the past 2 years I've pondered the question of dmac's cold toast pretty much every time I've eaten toast.

My mum goes the cold toast route. It's inhumane, in my opinion.

This is the hill of beans I'll die on, no bother

does it get toasty up there

i don't eat cold toast but i generally let it sit for about 30 seconds in the toaster so it's not quite piping hot either - also if you transfer directly to a flat surface it gets soggy (which i guess everyone knows hence the existence of toast racks)

I thought 'It's hardly worth a poll' immediately followed by a realisation that I Love Toast a lot more than I Love Music and they'll poll any ole shite without a care.

this was the real motivation ftp

wheat bread

Taking “sides”:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WJmKStqugMc

vs

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p8HoEvDh70Y

Is "grilled bread" simply toast?

I dread to imagine what else it could be

reanimated bread