Rolling Worst Music of 2018

this quote from post malone really says a lot about everything's suckitude

“If you’re looking for lyrics, if you’re looking to cry, if you’re looking to think about life, don’t listen to hip-hop. There’s great hip-hop songs where they talk about life and they spit that real shit, but right now, there’s not a lot of people talking about real shit... Whenever I want to cry, whenever I want to sit down and have a nice cry, I’ll listen to some Bob Dylan. Or whenever I’m trying to have a good time and stay in a positive mood, I listen to hip-hop. Because it’s fun. I think hip-hop is important because it brings people together in a beautiful, happy way.”

like he's a white rapper with no talent who's also... a rockist? you really can be anyone in america (if your dad runs nhl concessions)

my single is being released in January as originally tweeted. Nothing’s changed. I’ll anounce when I’m ready, a few days before.

— IGGY AZALEA (@IGGYAZALEA) January 2, 2018

rolling white rap '18

leaves me wondering which Dylan songs can make you cry

how about an igloo australia to go with the cold snap

yess

technically 2017 but

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WXyLdg4mJxo

Even Dylan would be rolling his eyes at that quote.

http://www.thesinglesjukebox.com/images/jarthur-18.png

that video cracks me up because he's screaming I'M STANDING HERE NA-KED when he is sitting there, fully clothed.

Congratulations to ilxor Karl "Post" Malone on his smash hit song rockstar!

Hey now

This year’s entry for rock band slapped together by central casting.
https://youtu.be/Wsm0xo-sA5I

Sounds like Collective Soul.

"Saw these guys open for Nickelback a while ago and was pretty impressed! Their drummer had so much energy on stage and I liked how they interacted with the crowd"

Made it to 0:25

I often wonder what sincere, tearful "Bob Dylan" nitwits like Post Malone are talking about certainly not the hermetic cryptic weirdo funnyman I've loved all these years

Does this count? https://www.nytimes.com/2018/02/05/opinion/dating-metoo.htm

Dammit https://nyti.ms/2GRSt0W

Clicked the link without realizing I had my sound turned off, but immediately saw ukulele and smirking and didn't even bother trying to listen to it.

Please watch the video, sicko.

OK, I did. Exactly as unfunny and annoying as I expected. The only thing that made me laugh a bit was the guy's mild resemblance to a young Rodney Dangerfield.

I like Chloe x Halle but this is not good, their own personal "New Americana":

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jsnyz__pc5M

This isn't good, but "New Americana" is an awfully low bar.

yeah, i don't even mind the kids are alright honestly
tbh if i hadn't known it was cxh going into it, i might feel different tho

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6OOq2mc6xqE

this really sums up everything bad about the late 2010s. all it needs is the imagine dragons guy snarling on backup

didn't really believe that was a JB cover until i hit play; the fucking nerve of some people

barf

let's take a super fun James Brown song but take out everything that is funky and cool and vibrant about it and replace it with a lifeless beat and an uncharismatic frontperson

Trying to imagine the hypothetical human being who would enjoy this song is even more difficult than trying to imagine the hypothetical human being who would still care about the 50 Shades series three movies in.

This has been compared to Neiked's "Sexual" but this is like the worst possible outcome of that song's impact:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JJahHkGD0YI

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aZla1ttZHaw

in which mr. dicky fantasizes about how wonderful it would be to be able to say the n-word if he were black

this song came on in my lyft last night and it filled me with rage

it was also a 'world premiere' on the iheart hip-hop station. happy bankruptcy you fucking motherfuckers

That video is a hate crime.

that's the dude from american vandal at the beginning?

who collaborated with the dicks

“I’m Kendall Jenner / I got a vagina / I’m gonna explore that right now / Holy s— I got a vagina / I’m gonna learn / I’m gonna understand the inner workings of a woman,” the 22-year-old Keeping Up with the Kardashians star raps as Lil Dicky.

http://people.com/music/ed-sheeran-kendall-jenner-backlash-chris-brown-music-video/

I was waiting for "Freaky Friday" to pop up here.

Fictionalized nice guy version of Chris brown wishes all his troubles would just go away, lil dicky wishes he had Chris brown's level of credibility. Magic Asian makes their dreams come true. Worse than I imagined from reading about it.

hobo johnson

https://youtu.be/5MIVvnQHxeM

difficult to watch

https://youtu.be/1slMsfR5eJQ

https://youtu.be/fB5dyNMNdT8

the concept seems to be bringing the concept of quiet-loud dynamics to gross white-boy rap; ie alternating between mumbling and YELLING for no reason

havent been able to get more than ten seconds into this but can someone please tell me what the fuck this shit is

https://youtu.be/JaOabnTaYdA

didn't listen but i did see someone call it 'twenty one pilots for kids who listen to the front bottoms'

me at the beginning of this thread: "lol, terrible, thanks guys, needed a laugh today"

me after watching that hobo johnson video: "we must exterminate the white race"

Those Hobo Johnson videos are from 2016.

this one is new

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5MIVvnQHxeM

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lJtymKPrSuQ

if you love twenty one pilots, you'll also love these five rejected pilots we found in a backyard xp

WOW!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c24Wp4N34oA

WE HAVE A WINNER!

oh my god

I'm extremely thankful for my office walls today because I'm fucking dying of laughter

somewhat stunned this has not made it here yet

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1jA7kpyqU8k

i certainly do

yo, that Hobo Johnson thing, i don't want to necessarily listen to it but that guy is doing something right.

what an unholy alliance

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m1-rpd3S-48

I saw those chaps on Sesame Street. I've only just now come to realize they're a real group and (apparently) quite successful

Every single member looks like the victim of a kidnapping by a rogue hipster stylist

i went to a sold-out arena show of theirs up here. the audience was fanatic about them. (i was pretty impressed by the technique of the guy who beatboxed while playing cello, but otherwise...)

absolute wankers sure but probably impressive enough to swerve my greatest ire

chainsmokers obv satan

jack white thing too charmingly awful to really merit consideration

Pentatonix is cringeworthy but it's hard to get too riled up about them when their stuff isn't on the radio. Per all-knowing Wikipedia they have had four charting singles. Three of them were Christmas songs and the fourth hit #99 on the Hot 100.

That said, their last three albums went #2, #1, #1 (though again, two of them were Christmas albums)

my eldest uncle adores them

Pentatonix is cringeworthy but it's hard to get too riled up about them when their stuff isn't on the radio

1, they are on tv a lot
2, they opened for kelly clarkson
3, acapella is a huge thing among The Youth Of Today
4, thanks to their christmas releases they are a holiday-radio fixture (which negates your original point)

And one of their holiday-radio fixture tracks is a cover of Hallelujah.

3. acapella is a huge thing among The Youth Of Today

yeah they're really breaking down the walls

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zAST4Ja7uTU

every time this 'Mean To Be' song by Bebe Rexha (apparently) comes on the radio it makes me feel physically nauseous. The lameness of the repeating lines 'ride with me, ride with me' like the most watered-down version of pop-country, I feel like I'm on a horrible merry-go-round that I can't get off. There's plenty of tosh out there but not since Meghan Trainor has there been a song that actually make me want to barf.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FfuHitQ6exk

Apparently a 2017 song, though I've only heard this horrifying thing in the past few weeks. Three times now and gets progressively worse each time.

Brad's Youth of Today joke is underrated.

Sheeran trying to co-write his way into the worst of 2018 class
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1tvLIhEaEKo

2002: The summer where we spent time singing songs from 2000.

i wanted that anne-marie record to be way better than it was

a terrible attempt at describing it, but I feel like it's a symptom of baconed nostalgia

Thread delivers once again.

had to turn it off immediately after first chorus

ed sheeran writes like a youtube comment

The actual YouTube comments on this thing are pretty funny, btw: lots of back and forth about whether the song was made for people who were kids in 2002 vs people who were *born in* 2002.

Well, that song is woeful. Are there any other songs mining the 00s for "nostalgia feels" yet or will this be the beginning of a new trend in pop?

Also, I feel like Alan Partridge saying this, but the "now we're under the covers" lyric caught me off guard. You think she's still singing about being 11 at that point. I know you only have to wait a couple of beats to find out they're now 18, but for a couple of moments there I've got an image of 2 naked 11 year olds in bed together. Poor songwriting!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=siPyWG17RK0

Yes, that's the woman from Karmin.

i wanted that anne-marie record to be way better than it was

― maura, Wednesday, May 2, 2018 9:30 AM (yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

same

I just realised that Freaky Friday got to #1 in the UK

Whoa, that Karmin thing....

based on the title I refuse to listen until Brad weighs in

this xtina song is meh but the bukakke happy video makes it way too extra (xtra?)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DSRSgMp5X1w

The shamelessness of the Karmin lady is really something to behold

No one with any sense of shame has any business making pop music.

damn the Xtina song is a nothing on its own and seems even moreso accompanied by the video

sad to see/hear that xtina song

worst 2 chainz verse ever

ty sux 2

i don't know who thought this would be a good idea but somehow labrinth, sia and diplo are in a group together and calling themselves "LSD"

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h_GwO10HroY

Lucinda Williams, Steve Earle and Dwight Yoakam are doing an LSD tour this year but I don’t think they’re collaborating on an album or anything.

That’s a whole different trip, man

that's just bad though, not worst

i think it's far worse than the xtina song, which - while certainly chaotic - is a vast improvement on the dross from her last album

"Red Hot Kinda Love" still sounds great

i wouldn't say i *like* that xtina song but it's certainly more interesting than the lead singles from her last two albums

ed sheeran writes like a youtube comment

― dyl, Thursday, May 3, 2018 2:22 AM (two days ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

lol

this is from November 2017 but feel like we missed it
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=43gm3CJePn0

Zombie by Bad Wolves is a travesty

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=di3vhELi6P0
sry

I don't think there's anything terrible enough that the "this is the dumbing down of society!" brigade in YT comments can't make me side with.

I kind of see why the Ängie track is terrible but I can't completely hate it.

I actually really like the beat on that one, but everything else is bad. Apparently her album is called Suicidal Since 1995 :/

that song is apparently from 2016...

https://hiskind.com/swedens-angie-on-mental-health-controversy-and-sexuality-in-music/

Mental health is another topic usually shielded from pop music and, as a young person myself, seeing someone like yourself addressing mental health feels incredibly refreshed and necessary. Why do you think it is still considered a taboo topic in music?
Suicidal thoughts is my biggest inspiration I think. I think suicidal thoughts are more common than you think and I want people to know that. Things can look so damn sparkly on the internet but behind all that most people are terrified of everything.

lol @ that song/video

oh yeah that's def 2016, didn't even check since it showed in my recommended videos (what have I been doing on yt) and just assumed it was new

the song is perhaps not that horrible, just sounds like a very contrived Uffie pastiche, and it def sounds like they did not put in much effort (maybe they should have just asked someone for help with the lyrics/structure, I mean it sounds like something you come up with after getting high or on a night on the town, but then you take that "idea" and work with it) anyway sry for the 2016 derail

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zokn4WDPcHE

Watching this awful video definitely enhances the experience of listening to this awful song.

I think we have a winner ;_;

so tasteless, a fair bit worse than that horrible Albatros single even

oh....my god. that video

Hahaha, OMG

It makes "Smoke Weed, Eat Pussy Everyday" look like a pop masterpiece in comparison!

It's a novelty song, what did you expect? There are far worse offenders.

Well I hope they keep being posted here!

This would've easily won the last Eurovision

There's worst as in hilariously bad, like this, then there's worst as in indicative of everything that's wrong with the world, like the lil dicky song.

this song is bad but it also rules, in the way all halloween songs do

I can't believe I used to like this band. Then again, Suffer turns 30 this year.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hES9IBTPbcw

lmao that it accidentally evokes that "we love our cops" song

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SiAuAJBZuGs

How old do you have to be before dressing and acting like a 16 year old becomes an embarrassment? 28 is definitely pushing it.

The question i have is this was make on a real supermarket ? 😂with she walking on the fridges 2:55 and all the random people buying stuff

There's a fine line, really? I was trying to figure out who Tessa Violet reminded me of, and then when they showed a close-up of her face and I saw the circles-under-her-eyes, I realized I was thinking of Khaela Maricich/The Blow, circa 2006

I like when women who are closer to 30 (or 40) sing about teenage-y shit like crushes, idk, it flies in the face of what is supposed to be expected of women-in-the-public-eye and I liked it when Liz Phair did it and I like it when The Blow did it and I like this Tessa Violet song too (tho not as much as the former artists)

Honestly the five songs off the new Drake album that I heard last night were worse than anything in this thread

Even that Albatraoz stuff has its charm for me, it makes me feel like I'm in a car full of Serbians

Drake is truly one of the pinnacles of eat-what-you're-given normie horseshit that passes for culture atm

Sheeran being possible nadir, sure, but one among several

post malone and chainsmokers are the twinned nadir

Yeah I was thinking of them too

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XY8t1d84Z3E

post chainsmokers era is upon us

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gblXgFi-DGI

yeesh

what the fuck is this shit

https://youtu.be/qzFXcUKOsYo

a song from 2014, apparently

Surprised this hasn't been posted here yet. Too obvious?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E4c7EE8_IX0

Ha, I was wondering if anything Toto or Weezer related had popped up in this thread yet!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oYnI--eSbnc

omg

jesus

Stay away from today’s kids, Paul!

this is amazing because of the sheer number of axes it is bad on

at least this is making me feel a bit better abt the new 1975 song in comparison

I forwarded it to a (Paul-loving) friend; he commented that the beat/chord progression reminds him of this:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vMXuuYnoRdI

time to rerun the solo beatles poll

i think we can just put this at no. 1 and bump everything down one notch

yeah this is horrible

disappointment plays a part

It's a definite 'how do you do fellow kids' moment but not THAT bad as a tune. Like, I think it'd be a sweet little ditty if not for the awful title/conclusion of the chorus.

It's like Galway Girl but worse

great day for George people

george was a big fan of Brute Force's "King of Fuh" and got it issued on the Apple label. i haven't heard this new song because my life is hard enough without my going out of my way to torture myself but i'm going to postulate that paul's new song can't be _that_ much worse.

is there a worst merch thread

Let it be known that my most embarrassing son, big boy sex-haver Zayn Malik, has the WORST fucking piece of merch I've ever seen for sale on his website pic.twitter.com/STEBeQqFp1

— Whitney Reynolds (@whitneyarner) August 16, 2018

finally figured out what the Macca song reminds me of:

http://www.youtube.com/results?search_query=len+steal+my+sunshine

+ Ryan Tedder

I don't know who "grandson" is but jesus he's like a compendium of irritating 00s vocal tics

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Sld6Iik_yhc&feature=youtu.be

lol why does he move around the stage like that

so bad

this song suck a lot
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qBTC7C2y11M

jesus christ @ paul mccartney

that doja cat moo song

oh come on, what young girl doesn't want to hear that they are worth more than every single gold chain, or hear the immortal words "you know I'm gonna smash it"

Quick-skipped past this abortion on the SYTYCD finale:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fRpZcFWJ_6A

Immediately thought of

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m-QT74bzHFQ

Lol

here you are:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WN6zE-wJ2iE

Some d-bag turned one of my favorite Tom Waits songs into a Big Bad Voodoo Daddy outtake.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pJgyklly4Ds

“If you’re looking for lyrics, if you’re looking to cry, if you’re looking to think about life, don’t listen to hip-hop. There’s great hip-hop songs where they talk about life and they spit that real shit, but right now, there’s not a lot of people talking about real shit... Whenever I want to cry, whenever I want to sit down and have a nice cry, I’ll listen to some Bob Dylan. Or whenever I’m trying to have a good time and stay in a positive mood, I listen to hip-hop. Because it’s fun. I think hip-hop is important because it brings people together in a beautiful, happy way.”

― maura, Wednesday, January 3, 2018 10:35 AM (ten months ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

this is a very strange quote from post malone because, to me, his music is far from happy. it's like the paradigm of what mark fisher called depressive hedonia

not that i would expect post malone to be self aware but you know

haha, that tom waits cover is very bad

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WXBHCQYxwr0

i feel very sad that a certain subset of gay men on the internet think that this reads as the future of pop

woulda posted this earlier but i thought it had already gotten posted

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jzD_yyEcp0M

woulda posted this earlier but i thought it had already gotten posted

📹

Is Marshmello some kind of Deadmau5 knockoff(?)

what if marshmello is actually just dr luke in a mask

oh jk he's not actually one of those anonymity-gimmick djs anymore

the "*OFFICIAL FRIENDZONE ANTHEM*" in the youtube vid title is just lol

yikes that's poor

the sweet but psycho is also crap, #1 in Denmark atm, at least it channels a bit of early gaga

it's a bit too obvious for my taste

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ACEKhljj5bk

heard this on vegas' modern rock station the other night

protest the hero have really pivoted huh

if you really miss Rage that much why not just listen to them?

weirdly it sounded much worse surrounded by a bunch of indifferently heaped rock songs from the '70s '90s and today than it does in isolation rn

I loved this band's first two records, and I was looking forward to their upcoming one, but this is some edgelord bullshit (it's musically cloddish and ugly as well):

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yISltUDNHfY

That Hyro the Hero thing is probably Whiney's favorite new song.

Eric Clapton - Jingle Bells (In Memory Of Avicii).

Yes, really.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C95EvXD86J8

It's actually… not as egregiously awful as I thought it would be?

a chance at least to update the old 'what did Eric Clapton do after he wrote Tears In Heaven' joke

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3w-C0-zVaW8

can someone direct me to info on the dissonance trend in contemporary pop? I hear it in not bad stuff as well, like Black Beatles

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tVO7xMofXko&feature=youtu.be

from this delightful article: https://www.theringer.com/music/2018/12/5/18126093/most-awkward-ellen-performances-2018

this isn't actually quiiite bad enough that i'd call it 'worst' anything but my goodness, i am astonished that anyone would actually try to have a breakthrough hit with this! the "love galore"-soundalike production, sza-type vocals on the verses and sevyn streeter-type vocals on the chorus, just reusing an entire chorus from an old hit verbatim without doing *anything* remotely ~clever~ with it. who thought this was a good idea? like damn, pick one wave to ride!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vbftOENTCfo

"sweet but psycho" is currently #2 in the UK charts and I honestly think this is the point I will have to give up on pop music as a source of pleasure

this is not new but i hate it omg

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G4K7EcyUev4&t=

also any instrumental song from any TV ad with ukulele and glockenspiel as the most prominent instruments

fuck this is what i meant to post earlier
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G4K7EcyUev4

fuck this is what i meant to post earlier
📹

"sweet but psycho" is currently #2 in the UK charts and I honestly think this is the point I will have to give up on pop music as a source of pleasure

The Christmas #1 this country deserves this year

honestly, this isn't THAT bad but it was the only thread that seemed appropriate to post it in
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=drCCchikcDc

maybe "most 2018 images"

"sweet but psycho" is currently #2 in the UK charts and I honestly think this is the point I will have to give up on pop music as a source of pleasure

The Christmas #1 this country deserves this year

Thank goodness for Sausage Rolls eh?
https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/entertainment-arts-46647954

LadBaby

Do you DARE subject yourself to two and a half hours of the worst music ILM heard this year?

ILM's 2018 Rolling Worst Music Spotify Playlist

Incidentally, I will openly rep for three of these.

Sorry if this was already posted, but it did come out in 2018, and it is worst.

https://youtu.be/Hc3XIbUuTMc

how did jud jud wind up on the playlist?

Rolling Worst Music of 2018