The essential paradox of Calum bashing

Having a good whipping boy can be very healthy for a community. (But then again, the Nazis said that, too, didn't they?)

My ears have pricked up already..... (thankfully, just my ears....)

but calum's thread say this: he is confused sexually. the responses are from people who have been or have seen friends degraded because of their sexuality.

in this context - 'trolls' provide group therapy sessions but really, since my friend CV is full and i'm not accepting new applications, who really cares?

A troll raises issues - often unintentionally, though Calz seems to think that he is doing this intentionally, I think his only good effects have been coincidentally. He's not challenging our notions of sexuality or authority or anything - most of them figured those out during our adolescence. But he is pushing our notions of tolerance. People like Calum are where the limits of our *community* are tested.

I don't have total tolerance, nor do I expect my interweb community to have such. I want peace and getting-along, and I am prepared to break a few heads to get it.

Part of me likes being annoyed by Calum, which is why I keep clicking on the threads in limited doses. It's better if I focus my irritation on him. Because there are some regulars on ILX who annoy the F@CK out of me to the point of distraction, but I try not to engage them because to fight with them would destroy the very pillars of the community. Easier to vent mild irritation at someone who seems to want the attention.

case-in-point: geir - geir talks about music. to some, it is boring - so they attack - he's inoffensive - but hell, arent they really attacking what they don't like about themselves - that maybe, they bore the shit out of people by talking about music obsessively.

with me? fuck knows. i tend to bring out the psycho in everyone.

Bullshit. That's funnier than a thousand Calum threads.

You're as much a part of ILX and the very core of this thing as I am, even while you maintain your "I am an outsider! Really!" stance.

You don't have Jets without Sharks.

But more importantly I never understood myself through the time spent on here - it only aggravated my sense of self-loathing (at times when I was down) and really, who needs a bunch of strangers donig that?

1. the thing - i never did learn one damn thing about myself. except i have an insatiable but ultimately destructive desire to be 'liked'.

2. 'doomie' is a construct in your head. the person typing these words behind a computer is very different. the construct of 'doomie' will run when i'm not around or when i've finally given up on this thing. you will play with it, call it awful names, project negative experiences upon it but hell, do what you like with it. it's not me. so in that way, 'doomie' will always be a part of ilx. and hell, you can have it. it's yers. but it's not me.

(i learned a lot abt myself)

(= i have a vicious streak a mile wide: b4 ilx i sincerely and wrongly believed i was nice through and through)

i asked some questions of a very well-known writer, a popular singer and a fellow who deals with artists all the time and is a bit eccentric - these people are my friends, they give me some honest answers based on their experiences and it was cool - it was almost like a peter tork styles light bulb went on in my head. these people knew what i was talking about. and they illuminated more for me in three individual hour long conversations than two years spent on this board. it all makes sense now!!! if only i asked these questions two years ago!!!!

Wow, pop stars = more intelligent and interesting than Real People! I wish someday that lightbulb would hit me, but it never has.

If Doomie = Ali and Geir = Foreman then, obviously, Callum = Leon Spinks

people who own mobile phones are all mobile phone users

people who are teetotal are all non drinkers

people who post to an internet community are all members of the community

it is impossible to be an outsider, there is no such thing. calum, doomie, ronan and dave stelfox are not outsiders to ilx. they are core members. my mum is an outsider to ilx, she has never posted to ilx or even seen it.

a country encompasses all the live in, even those that hate it, and even those that others in that country reject.

a community encompasses all that post to it, even those that dont like it, and even those that are rejected by other members

calum bashes ILM, this does not stop him being part of ilm. if a new person finds ilm tomorrow, they will see a bunch of names in a row. they will not know which ones consider themselves inside and outside the community. they will be unable to distinguish. they will all be 'ilm posters'

The idea of Doomie is more powerful than the poster behind him.

I see I've just fallen victim to the paradox myself. Can I name it? I would like to call it 'Barrow's paradox', and thereby secure my fame in the annals of literary history. If only in some small way.

Barrow's paradox: The paradox that occurs wherever a situation is best dealt with by ignoring it or letting it pass. The paaradox occurs wherever someone points out that a situation is best ignored; at which point they contradict themselves by failing to ignore it.

For those of us who lacked emotion, there was no better backline than Tassoti, Baresi, Maldini, Costacurta. Although his career was ruined by a tragic car accident, one almost might say that Gianluigi Lentini exemplified the cold and ruthless, or even emotionless attitude to football which made AC Milan so very successful.

Rossi was of course that rare thing, a truly consistent goalkeeper who marshalled the magnificent defence in front of him. Then there was Dejan Savicevic. And lets not forget Marco Van Basten, possibly the greatest striker of all time.

Was there ever a more cold and emotionless victory than their pummelling of Gothenburg in the European Cup. The same game in which Van Basten wowed crowds with a tremendous overhead volley?

Who can really say, but one thing is certain, the AC Milan team of the early 90s were a marvel to behold.

Incidentally Kate, if you relax by looking at Escher prints, you yourself are somewhat paradoxical. How's that writing going?

I can stand anything except boredom. There is a difference between repition and boredom. Repetition is strangely calmly, especially a paradoxical one - hey, an entire religion is based on this principle, see Zen. Repetition and paradoz cause the brain to go all zen and relax and go somewhere else. Boredom causes the brain to look for SOMETHING ELSE to do - usually negative.

OTM. I laughed and laughed when I saw Kate calling Calum "a fantasist and a solipsist". (Er, well, that's hardly undiscussed.)

But remember that if the troll defends himself / counterattacks then he as well will try to scare people with the things he's scared of, in text or manner, and therefore providing insight into his character. I'm afraid you have done it, too, and keep doing it automatically. Everybody does. Well, almost. There has been no troll on ILX yet who can really find people's buttons and push them instead of subconsciously talking about himself all the time. And thank God for that.

you can't compare both: calum's threads haven't got much to do with music.

It was realy nice meeting dommie and him telling me most of this stuff face to face.

The milan team of the early 90s was wonderful and lets hope they thrash juve in next week's champion's league final.

When I said I like boredom, I think meant that I like the subject of boredom. I'm not sure I like being bored. Actually, now I think about it, boredom is a bit like the sound barrier - it causes increasing stress as you approach it, but then there's a big band and suddenly everything's alright... now, back to the football...

As he has pointed out, many of the things that he's guilty of, I'm also guilty of. There's no real difference between Meg's breasts and Julian's ass, when it comes down to it. The difference is, I have drunkenness and extreme mental duress to beg in explanation of my behaviour. If you have a friend who is quite reasonable most of the time, but every now and then has a bit too much to drink at a party and starts singing loudly, leaps on the table and moons the other guest, I think you're generally a little more willing to forgive them and accept their foibles than a person you *don't* know, who never seems to do anything else - drunk or sober - except crash parties, leap on the table and moon your guests.

B-b-b-but it's the not so wonderful Milan team of the early 00s that is competing, Julio!

When I said 'big band' I meant 'big bang', of course. It was a Freudian slit. Er, slip, a Freudian slip. Bit of an own goal there.

yes but i support them!

The diff between Kate talking about Julian's arse and Calum talking about the Sugarbabe of his choice is that Kate is funny and Calum's not.

Kate hating football at least makes me happy. She has one good facet. I didn't know Celtic were playing until 2 days ago at work, and I don't like my brain being taken up by anything involving, associated with or directly linked to football. I know the names of about two active footballers (Beckham and Giggs) and that's two names too much that my brain is currently wasted by storing...

(Thread hijack!)

The other thing is that, in my experience, internet personalities highlight the vast gulf between the person you think you (or want to be) are the the person you really are. I do not exempt myself from this.

(I used to know much more abt italian league and now its all gone)

Is what I really meant. I can't string coherent sentances together IRL either.

Thank God for Sky Sports.

My motto - if you wanna see footie - get your arse to a footie ground and play or pay to watch.

It doen't work like that, sorry Doom.

1. the thing - i never did learn one damn thing about myself. except i have an insatiable but ultimately destructive desire to be 'liked'.

What about other people? They do exist. Did you learn anything about them? Most people want to be liked.

2. 'doomie' is a construct in your head. the person typing these words behind a computer is very different....=it's not me. so in that way, 'doomie' will always be a part of ilx. and hell, you can have it. it's yers. but it's not me.

All anyone is to someone else is an idea in their head.
Doomie is an aspect of your character.
He's as much you as you are.

Yes but to be quite frank why would any one of us give a flying fuck what ILX posters are like in real life, except maybe those of us who attend FAPs? If someone annoys me on ILX, he's annoying period, I'm not about to go searching for the wonderful human being that he may be in real life.

(note: this is not referring to doomie)

(The thing about FAPs is of course that they put people, especially new people, into a completely artificial social situation where there is a hefty bank of shared knowledge/assumed common ground when in reality you're still pretty much strangers - so small talk and naturally evolving conversation in the usual way is kind of skewed from the start. This both a good thing and a bad thing when it comes to "getting to know the real people", I imagine.)

Going back to the topic does anyone reckon the Ajax team of the mid 90s would have given the Milan team of the early 90s a bit of a hammering?

They did of course, in the mid 90s. But at this point the Milan team of the early 90s were no longer in the early 90s.

I LOVE MUSIC THREAD ANALYSIS
Threads about music: 62
Threads about poster airing their dirty laundry: 62,195,732

there are more teams in italian football on a level i'd say.

So what? Does that negate the existence of the music threads? Why is talking about personal experience necessarily "airing dirty laundry"? For some of us, talking about the personal is urgent and key in terms of discussing music and why it affects us.

as for italian football,i don't think its shown anywhere any more,my friend was looking for it but it didn't seem to be on digital or anything...

I'm sure contemplating boredom an then contemplating your contemplation of boredom and then contemplating your contemplation of your contemplation of boredom, etc. might turn out to be a Great Leap Forward in Buddhist Meditation techniques. We should print these threads out and mail them to a Nepalese monastery.

Joe suggested that whenever I got really really wound up, that I should just relax and think about him and filthy things, and that that would make me all calm and happy again.

And it worked. I'm calm and happy. Back to work.

However, on average, a Calum thread generates at least 100 posts when other far more interesting threads recieve far, far less. Why is this?

You have to give up any claim to both derricks and the centre, all your opponent has to do is just take and hold these and you will eventually lose. Failing that as soon as lotus comes in you are in trouble. Also the bombard cannon can't fire on elevated or lower ground so on TD it is useless on either side of your base or in the centre of the map.

I mean, what THE FUCK does Kant, or the categorical imperative, have to do with music?

Calum can't be a Solipsist, or display any solipsistic tendencies, as HE WOULDN'T POST ON THE BOARD IF HE DID.(Technically, I could be a solipsist, as I do hurt animals, and wonder if they have any feelings as I do so. Just kidding.)

His responses about his own personal experiences, and the problems he has had in his personal life, automatically rule Solipsism out. Whether you think that he's racist, homophobic, woman hating, or just stupid-fat-bint-bating, is epiphenomenal.

You could say he was narcissistic,as he could be seen to be self-obsessed and yet insecure.

But then, what's more self-obsessed and insecure? Going on about which Sugababe is the most attractive (I'm with the Asian one myself) or feeling the need to write PAGES of diary like confessions, spiced up with some intellectual window dressing, that you can't even get right? And then brag about having a "whipping boy?"

Calum, mate, you go on posting about Avril Lavigne as often as you like, as at least you're talking about a facet of the music industry that is CRUCIAL (sex sells)and not concerned about how you can best slip Derrida into a conversation about Pearl Jam and still look trendy.

And incidentally, the good old categorical imperative. Should we choose to have anal sex or not? Well, if we all went around having anal sex, then there would be no more children born in the world, and therefore, if you ever want to have children, then anal sex fails Kant's law. (Which of course, depends on the premise that having children is a worthwhile thing, but I'm sure Kant would've thought so.)

And then there's the predictable and stupid comments from Pashmina and Kate and russ twat and that big turd knocker Kilian (the ultimate ill informed badger buggerer) about "hey how can you discuss sex in relation to music = you must be a homophobe (!) or you are exploiting poor defenseless musicians who only want to be seen for their music regardless of any sexy videos or magazine layouts they appear in which are against their will anyway". I'd advise any of you morons to listen to "Virgin Sexy" on the Sugababes album and tell me if they don't try and sell sex... clearly, they want to be judged on account of how fuckable they are (to a large extent anyway) and I'd love to get it orn with the Scouser and the black girl. I don't think the other one is quite as hot - but what the hell. She can join in too.

its a nerdy amusing way of treating your equally stupid 'questions' with the contempt they deserve...your threads only end up with this many responses because they create arguably great opportunities for 'meta', thanks to the other people on the board being clever/sad/bored enough to bother posting anything at all (hello me)

i think you have misintepreted the comments of your main detractors as much as you feel they have misintepreted yours...i don't believe you are racist or homophobic in the recognised sense, tho your attitudes to women and homosexuals do strike me as embarassingly blinkered at times e.g. failing to accept that Russ can be gay now despite having had a long term loving relationship with a woman in the past, only talking about women as sex objects on a board designed for discussing MUSIC (obviously subjects such as the sexiness of female (and male, thanks to kate ;) artists will occur naturally in the discussion of their work and image...and if you want to discuss it that badly then i'd suggest developing the question further than just 'how much would you like to bang Emma Bunton? and is it more than i do?' or whatever). you can't justify your lame threads with the 'sex sells music' argument because you do not pose deep enough questions on this subject, and threads like the Sugababes or Holly Valance ones amount to nothing more than being in the pub, seeing the video on TV and some drunken curmudgeon nudging you and saying 'phwoar, eh?' - whats the point in that?

Not quite a Zen koan.

Calum, you don't "discuss sex in realtion to music." You just advertise your hard-on when you see boobies.

and threads like the Sugababes or Holly Valance ones amount to nothing more than being in the pub, seeing the video on TV and some drunken curmudgeon nudging you and saying 'phwoar, eh?' - whats the point in that?
Calz: I mean, yer woman...she's a go-er, eh, wink-wink nudge nudge say no more?
Stevem: ...look, just what are you implying?
Calz: Well, er...um...yer a man of the world, squire...I mean...you've BEEN with a lady...roight?
Stevem: Yes...
Calz: Whats it like?

And this thread DID bore me the minute it got boring. I hoped a comment like that would confuse you cretins for a while.

hardly.