Oh ffs...Rolling Worst Songs of 2013

Foxygen - "On Blue Mountain" - strings a bunch of familiar songs together with their own dumb lyrics, and at nearly 6 minutes in length it's a form of torture.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Cq7aPbhTqdQ

after 8 hours of listening to the music played at my work (all the most inoffensive and creatively-asleep dad-rock that exists) i found this pleasant! he's an idiot but at least he's a little bit youthful about it.

I'm sure worse songs will come along, but this was just the first song I hated of the year, and with cause, I believe.

This came out in December, but I decided to post it here since I fear it might end up charting later this year.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QhxPBrxxaqc

ffs skylar grey

ffs whoever directed that video

ffs Eminem (retire now!)

and ok this song was released last september but it's january so who cares, and i have to listen to this song every day at work and it's the most irritating of them all

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0gEVaniPOmU

like every other song there it's bland bullshit built around someone singing a boring cliche over and over and over again and acting like it's magical

Agreed, zachlyon. I involuntarily listen to a lot of Sirius Alternative Nation at work, too. Of Monsters & Men's previous single was somehow more banal, made even more life-draining by some sub-third-wave ska horn playing used as the hook. "Little Talks." I will say that these songs are all-time masterpieces compared to Matt & Kim's "Let's Go."

#shutdown6music xpost

http://www.youtube.com/watch?&v=JrprQuYo6rY

have we talked about Twenty One Pilots yet

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ktBMxkLUIwY

It's like fundot taken to its illogical extreme.

fueled by ramen is really fueled by garbage these days

It's like fundot taken to its illogical extreme.

― Johnny Fever, Monday, January 28, 2013 9:03 AM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

plus Eminem's latter-day flow
plus "left-side brain" phrasing ripped from fucking "Hey, Soul Sister"

fuck this

definitely the most unpleasant rap voice of the year

this is really embarrassing, i'm embarrassed for him

liked her way better as Holly Brook on that Fort Minor song

Skylar Grey stated that she's poking fun at widespread and excessive sexualization and she also told MTV, "The video is a combined effort between director Isaac Rentz, me and Eminem, and we just wanted to make sure it was very clear that it's a sarcastic song."

“There's one scene in the music video where I'm dressed up in this Red swimming suit with a Red , pink nails, a pink bicycle with an ice-cream cone on the back of it and it's totally girly — and not me at all. I think that's clear, because that scene happens over the bridge of the song, where I say, 'I'm only f--king with you, and f--k you for thinking it's true,' and that's when I have the pink polka-dot thing on, so it's saying, "I Love Eminem".'

i think the twenty one pilots song would be fine without the rapping but

oh man the rapping is so awful

lolz @ skylar

and that's when I have the pink polka-dot thing on, so it's saying, "I Love Eminem".'

"annotate my face?"

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wQvEHtrlb_Y

that one gets a pass because the video has Fudge Stripe Cookie content

this video +skylar grey means 2013 is the year of tumblr .gif mise en scene I guess

If you last long enough on that horrible video, "so not going to happen" happens.

For all I know this song is three years old, but that Pitbull song with Christina Aguilera that samples A-Ha is the worst thing I've heard this year, for several reasons.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Nszl1iHF4xo

oh jeeze how did I miss the cringefest that is Twenty One Pilots?? (+10 points for the autotuned scream that happens after the first chorus, tho)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bPu-Cm6pehs

It's amazing how basically anything Pitbull puts out is guaranteed to show up here eventually, it's like the shit version of the Beatles knowing their singles will all go to #1.

As for "Porsche" it's sort of forgettable and harmless but really I just refuse to believe that Nelly has gone all gloss-glitter-pop, this is like a rejected demo someone presented to Flo Rida.

somehow found my way to this and i was regretting it immmediately

http://youtu.be/xpztDCJ-ZMk

whoops

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xpztDCJ-ZMk

"somehow"

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J-gYJBsln-w

Utterly generic although the shit video might put it into contention. What the hell awful filter is it that everything's shot through now where the goal is to look underexposed, dusty and gray? Is this really the right theme for a song about raucous partying and glorious youth?

https://soundcloud.com/mrmitchmusic/mr-mitch-catford

It might be one of the worst, or possibly the best. I cannot yet decide.

oh my god i hate it so much
<iframe width="560" height="315" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/nilUlU6fM0s"; frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nilUlU6fM0s

damn, gr80 really let himself go

There could/should be a separate thread called "Oh ffs...Rolling Train Songs of 2013"

looks like this is the 4th single so they may be nearing the end of this album's promotion cycle. but yes, as long as maroon 5 has one also.

Actually, Pitbull seems to be the reigning champ of this thread (and ones from previous years), but I certainly hate way more Train and Maroon 5 songs than I do Pitbull ones.

omg i made it 50 seconds in and that train song is literally nauseating to me, that's quite remarkable.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VnZhDGmMvC4

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=trtdEg34eII

I don't care what you say, maura! That 2AM Club song is still great!

I mean really, it's not un-clever, the guys who sings can sing, the guy who raps can rap, the production is clean and works with the mood/message of the song, and it has a great chorus. I really don't understand the hate. Are you trying to distance yourself from who you imagine the audience must be?

lol that song is idiotic

i'm going to throw it out there that it's the concept, rather than the execution, that makes this qualify for this thread. shit is so grossly bro'd out

So you say, but I have been there, and I'm not a bro.

Granted, I haven't been there 100s of times and no strip clubs were involved, but still...

the guys who sings can sing, the guy who raps can rap, the production is clean and works with the mood/message of the song

These things might (arguably) be true, but as a whole this thing is straight garbage.

It's got a memorable hook and is strongly melodic in other places, too. The lyrics are specific, sometimes even clever. The song is one long, lame excuse for bad behavior - but consider: if the lyrics were less specific, would we <i>understand</i> that it's a long, lame excuse for bad behavior? This song is descriptive, not prescriptive.

kat dahlia is cracking me up

wtf @ Kat Dahlia

are we not allowed to dislike things that are well-executed yet utterly bankrupt? i mean sure 'desexualized maroon 5' is an idiom that is popular right now but replicating it should not be APPLAUDED

also if you want a much better example of this schtick please try that wallpaper. song from last year.

yeah i mean it being well-executed doesnt change the fact that it relies entirely on its central conceit to be distinctive in any way, and that conceit is dumb

Is this a "competent execution makes the song MORE noxious, not less" argument? That self-aware bros are the worst kind of bros because they can spread their messages of partying and lame excuses more effectively? Because I can see that. I don't consider bro-dom the ultimate, irrideemable pop music evil, though. To me, this is a song about giving endless lame excuses instead of fixing the underlying problem, and the girlfriend has still left him, in the end.

lol @ kat dahlia

I don't consider bro-dom the ultimate, irrideemable pop music evil, though.

this is probably the source of your disagreement

its just a corny song b/c i cant identify w/ it, really as simple as that. "Sorry babe, i'm completely ignoring u b/c i'm getting drunk w/ my bros" is the kind of thing that would make me feel like kind of a dick & guilty about it, not something i wd want to celebrate in song

like there are songs about smothering significant others that are good WEVE ALL BEEN THERE AMIRITE but it's just the attitude dude takes in this particular instance that feels kinda like, huh?

i don't think it's even very competent

it feels like a bad Lonely Island song

YES. thank you dan

like there are songs about smothering significant others that are good WEVE ALL BEEN THERE AMIRITE but it's just the attitude dude takes in this particular instance that feels kinda like, huh?

― rap steve gadd (D-40), Sunday, March 10, 2013 4:11 PM (1 hour ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

lol just realized the way this reads is like a whiney drowning joek

'songs about significant others who figuratively smother you with the need for constant communication'

urghhhh lol kat dahlia

lock thread, she wins

(it didnt impwess me none)

wtf sylvia rhone signed her

dementia is a terrible thing

how the hell did mr mitch get on this thread btw, stay in your own lanes ppl

2am club is pretty gluh in every way
the dahlia feels like there's maybe something of merit in there underneath all the posturing but eh probably not worth the trouble to try as much as i appreciate the 50 recycling (nb: i stopped watching the video immediately, my guess is that the visuals probably make it virtually impossible to find sympathy for)

it's also just unbearably monotonous and ugly with or without the lyrics

yeah well, unbearably monotonous i can deal with sometimes

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ifIfpAWC4Jg

imagine a streets song xeroxed 50 times

pretty harsh to the streets imo

that Train song is pure black seething evil, omg.

this Train song is hilarious

I basically feel like their entire career at this point is a cautionary tale for Maroon 5

hate everything about the 2AM Club one *except* the actual song. the dudes, the concept, the video can all go die in a fire.

Just... why

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g8ecLZtPssQ

gasface

is it worth turning of "Tour de France" to experience this?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kw19TnbL2DY

really loathe this

not listening in any case but is that a cover/interpolation?

Kat Dahlia: can't decide whether this is supposed to sound like Rihanna or Nelly Furtado. If this was a huge hit I'd probably grow into being really annoyed with it but it seems less horrible than most of the things in this thread. Decent production, kind of hooky in places. 4:14 is a bit long for this though.

Ed Drewett: Just doesn't hang together, the backing tracks and vocal don't seem to be talking to each other at all. Also, his resemblance to Sting is really throwing me off here.

Wale/Tiara Thomas: Dumb and boring.

thanks for reviewing these joke songs

that wale is worse than dumb tho imo, dumb implies a passivity, this knows exactly what it's doing and is p despicable for it

kat dahlia song is like an eight year old writing a story

and then this happened, and then this happened, and then this happened

i really hate this song

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F90Cw4l-8NY

i like the Tiara Thomas solo version of "Bad" enough that i kinda tolerate the Wale version. lot of his singles would be fine R&B cuts w/o him.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DsSn_-NRwBQ

lot of his singles would be fine R&B cuts w/o him.

― Stephen Thomas Duttywine (some dude), Monday, March 18, 2013 7:45 AM Bookmark

otm

fucking twenty one pilots keeps getting stuck in my head. uncool.

I was gonna ask, what's wrong the Bastille song? And then the chanting chorus came in...

Hah that Ex-Girlfriends thing, I'm convinced it's a group designed to battle piracy by annoying the crap out of you through pop-up windows blasting the song.

how on earth is the kat dahlia song on the rock chart

WAHT

RIP USA

i guess it sounds like 'chick sublime' which O_O

The wholesale Mumford biting of this is sort of breathtaking

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ja8qvGDWiQ8

Oh ffs. Round up all these bands and throw them in a deep dark pit!

RIP music

I have not been this irritated with and disconnected from popular music since 1987

that's the worst song on rolling worst songs of 2013 so far

I've heard the kat dahlia on the radio twice, but on 2 different r&b stations

okay I felt bad because I'd written that before I played maura's latest contribution to the thread

now I am listening to it and I seriously want to murder everyone in the world

better kat dahlia than macklemore

that mumfordy thing feels more like wallpaper than an active offense but maybe i'm brainwashed

if the choice is between Kat Dahlia and Macklemore, someone is losing limb or two

That Brave Baby track strikes me as less hideous than Mumford, Lumineers or Phillip Phillips, but that might have something to do with my only having heard this once (for now?).

that Brave Baby track is so so so SO much worse than Phillip^2s

For all I know this song is three years old, but that Pitbull song with Christina Aguilera that samples A-Ha is the worst thing I've heard this year, for several reasons.

― Josh in Chicago, Thursday, February 28, 2013 12:53 PM (3 weeks ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

I heard this today. Terrible. Why do they even use that melody? It's not like it's super-engaging and necessary for the song to work. They could have kept the same chords and put any old melody over it.

http://soundcloud.com/theboiler/limp-bizkit-ready-to-go

That's pretty fun, actually.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q3nY-XKjBrU

Be sure to listen to the end.

ELL OH ELL

can we change thread title to "Oh ffs...Rolling Sons of Mumford 2013?"

maura you are doing a lot of work here and I can't tell if it's for good or for evil but thank you regardless

I miss Maura's year end roundups of worst songs (unless a 2K12 one was pub'd somewhere that I didn't know about?). Any chance of reviving it for the mag?

Foxes and dogs
Hearts and plugs
Stoves and pianos
Sweaters and spice racks

Could not make through more than half of Brave Baby. "Foxes and dogs play tooooooooo...." Way to sully my memories of:

http://content9.flixster.com/question/51/21/68/5121683_std.jpg

I only did an F2K12 playlist, which was greatly assisted by last year's ILM thread on the subject, as well as the emergence of Lumineers et al.
http://open.spotify.com/user/maurajohnston/playlist/7LR1QkQnEPvLAIUTRxwCpr

Maybe at the end of this year! I would love to have Chris back, cough cough.

oh and here's this year's
http://open.spotify.com/user/maurajohnston/playlist/0WPppq8bQwHHSeMMxN2xwi

I was wondering what was so awful about the Adana Twins track...then I heard the sample.

Haha, I had the same experience with the intro (my tolerance for downtempo whatever-that-genre-is being pretty high.) I think even the Morrison sample could have worked (for me) if there was less of it.

Couldn't agree more re: the Karmin track, especially if that's an ordered list.

What's so horrible about the Adana Twins track?

Jim Morrison is horrible, making that track horrible by association.

Enh, even with Jimbo in it that track was just aural wallpaper to me. Better than Singing Adams, anyway, but one person's ignorable is another's horrible.

Like many things I hear, it would be better as a strict instrumental.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RGF6c0tjAgI

got 50 seconds into this.

^^^ My local country station has billboards with just their logo and uncaptioned photos of two male singers (presumably to their target demo they need no introduction.) Thanks to this thread I now know who the dude in the ball cap and sunglasses is. There's bits of this I can actually tolerate - it sounds like "real" country music and not Fleetwood Mac - but... yeah.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h_WsoQ_PlME

*seizure*

my brain after eating an entire box of Lucky Charms

That's incredible. The sometimes I don't want to rhyme breakdown is world class.

I think if I'd just heard that instead of hearing it while watching the video I'd like it a lot more.

That seems like it should be on the Tim and Eric thread. Or an episode of Workaholics.
is it "witch house"

i want that guy to be a 47 yo record exec who put this band together after extensive market research

THEY'RE CANADIAN

lol @ 'i don't make cents i make change.' obama!!!

"Fake Shark-Real Zombie! have toured with artists such as Mindless Self Indulgence, Klaxons, Hot Hot Heat, Brokencyde, The Birthday Massacre, Marianas Trench, Jeffree Star and Test Icicles."

god

okay I straight up (possibly ironically? but I don't think so) love Fake Shark Real Zombie

gonna be walking around today going "tutututu, tutututu, tututu" for hours

"Liar is the third album by Vancouver dance punk band Fake Shark – Real Zombie!. It was released on February 14, 2013. The album is a bit of direction change for the band, and the first with label, Light Organ Records. Guests include Care Failure of the band Die Mannequin, Jimmy Urine of Mindless Self Indulgence, Steve Bays of Hot Hot Heat, and Henry Rollins.[1]"

KEVVY MENTAL, PROPHET OF A GENERATION

there is a certain kind of butt-stupid self-indulgence that I go bananas for and it looks like this (see also: LMFAO)

They ripped off lowt ide http://lowt-ide.bandcamp.com/track/would-you-guys-mind-not-playing-anymore-songs

this get weird song is making me rethink the whole "no such thing as guilty pleasures" thing

haha. myself, i'm wondering how i can like something that i simultaneously find unlistenable.

I love this and don't think it's unlistenable at all. Good stupid fun by people who probably aren't stupid, sure.

this dude's original incarnation is kind of RHCP-covers-Tom-Vek

http://open.spotify.com/album/0EOtzqu8TvkriiNCQsYq0U

get weird = this year's "neato" although something about it also just screams the late 90s to me even though except for the effect on the vocal nothing about it really sounds like that period. I dunno, I get this "Methods of Mayhem" vibe from all this shit, maybe with a little bit of Bran Van 3000.

it took 2 days, but I now enjoy this without irony. i possibly like it better than "thrift shop."

get weird = this year's "neato" although something about it also just screams the late 90s to me
re: "neato" i hear "the bum bum song" personally. "look mom we're neato" is kind of a deal-breaker. "get weird" is way better IMO.

It comes from Brazil and it's one the worst things i've heard in years
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5uZobckXtW8

So that's this year's Green Jellö, right?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=74Jm7xx8I-Y

my boss LOVES Kat Dahlia and is convinced that she's going to be the next Lauren Hill (whatever that means-- I think it means something about 'conscientious lyrics' or some shit, although he disapproves the mention of smoking weed in one of her songs).

aggressively irritating twee indie
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RBwz1g0FvDE

This guy learned how to sing by listening to Weird Al albums.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LLOlo2zYqt8

I know a lot of artists mellow out/lose their edge with age, but guitarists usually at least keep their chops. If anything they tend to get more into noodling. What happened to him?

Get Weird is insanely lazy and annoying, but it is not unlistenable if you don't pay attention.

"aggressively irritating twee indie" - this might be the worst one yet.

Should at least be easy to avoid, thank christ.

"WHOA-OA-OA-OA" bands are the worst

That BOATS band thing is the worst yet.

Johnny Marr kinda weak but does not belong on this list.

OK, everything else on this thread has either inspired a "meh" or an "ugh", but I actually REALLY like "Drunk Dial". The connection to The Streets is only tertiary, this has WAY more in common with Craig David or Shanks & Bigfoot. Hell, there's even an Artful Dodger club mix. So, if we're officially deep enough into the 2000s for a pop-2-step revival, bring it on.

My god this BOATS song.

I sorta like other songs by Boats.

t t t too t t t too t t too
t t t too t t t too t t too
t t t too t t t too t t too
t t t too t t t too t t too

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DDlklKl1fr8

was gonna post "lol slothrust - shit name but song is indestructible" till I got to the chorus

Are today's 40-somethings the first generation to look at today's teens and 20s and wonder when the fuck they're going to come up with something new?

There's plenty of new stuff, it's just not in the rolling worst songs thread.

hmmm
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CslNbuL4OYk

okay I looked at that album cover and fuck listening to that

...yeah, what he said.

Not directly related but as I posted elsewhere, this was most of my evening last night:

*reviews promo email*

"Hmm, not bad cover art I guess, some of the description is okay, this band sounds inter-"

*photo reveals a grinning beardo with a mandolin-type thing and another beardo with a squeezebox; both are wearing hats*

"SIGH."

*email deleted*

*reviews promo email...*

Oh, you guys...you're missing out on this one.

Yeah, at least make it through the first thirty seconds for the comedy.

that Boats song is fucking horrifying.

omg @ The Bunny The Bear

new favorite song

that album cover is totally cracking me up; going in.

holy teetotal fuck this song is hysterical
BLEEDING!

I kind of like this song.

Because it sounds like it's purposefully terrible.

it totally digs into that adolescent budding music nerd thought train of "there are so many ways for music to still evolve! just think of all the genres you could combine!" and reminds everyone why i was a dumb kid

which one's the bear?

if this thread was all stuff like that and "get weird" we could just delete the rest of ilx

holy shit. After listening to The Bunny The Bear I feel confident in saying that in the distant future 2013 will be known as The Year Crunkcore Broke.

like literally broke, into a million pieces

The Bunny The Bear The BOATS supergroup dream team!

Associated acts: A Liar Wrote This Symphony, Ovaries, Drop Dead, Gorgeous,

This guy learned how to sing by listening to Weird Al albums.

― Johnny Fever, Wednesday, April 3, 2013 1:38 PM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

crossed with the Apples in Stereo, god 'bless 'em, and I guess the general context is Post-MGMT Chart Rock, with a dash of Generic Indie Rock Twanging And Chanting for the last section. Oddly, this means it mixes together a bunch of things which I do basically like, with a completely pukey result.

Jeezus that Boats song...

how come no one has murdered them yet

The Bunny The Bear sounds like a Eurovision entry from one of the more desperate Eastern European countries that never qualify for the final. Classic obv.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MLRkC_UQp8s

Oh man, that The Bunny The Bear track! Fucking awesome.

hahaha i love this bunny and the bear song, by far the most digestible electrometalclashwhatevercore thing i've encountered

we never do this, but we need to do a year end poll.
i think i'm voting bunny/bear at this point but it's close

there's already a best tracks poll every year

WE HAVE A WINNER

http://youtu.be/EvKqIhyjmR8

I kind of enjoyed that. I wouldn't listen again, but it was interesting that one time.

ahahaha throw them in a pit and set them on fire

David Jacobs 2 months ago
so great to hear real music again being done

I'd imagine everybody in the universe that wanted to hear an R. Kelly x Rusted Root collaboration is pleased.

Maybe not the worst, but certainly the worst-smelling artists on here so far.

They really capture the beginning of this thread title.

Aah deja vu explained, this already happened.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mP9EUEa63rM

Then you had the Phoenix thing at Coachella, so a decade after the fact Ignition becomes the go to ironic indie appropriation funtimes song.

I need to punch these people to death

to DEATH

Download ALL of Jinja Safari's music. ITS EPIC!

This may not be the worst song of 2013 but it's certainly the most shameless ripoff of 2013: http://miyazaki.bandcamp.com/track/sequence

it totally digs into that adolescent budding music nerd thought train of "there are so many ways for music to still evolve! just think of all the genres you could combine!" and reminds everyone why i was a dumb kid

― infirm neophytic child (zachlyon), Friday, April 12, 2013 4:16 AM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

OTM. Screamo-lectro-clash! Wave of the future!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jGmvGKG0EJo

It's old, but it should be noted.

Jesus Fucking Christ we have a winner.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ywg0Mi_x4AE

still reeling from princess rebel tbh

really needed the two minutes of horrible gross framing narrative there

yeah, the video's way worse than the song

Princess rebel is hilarious in a good way. Would watch again.

Yeah, I liked Princess Rebel too. Though the song felt way longer than 3-something minutes...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rUFdlWK3edQ

good god

i feel like the ex-girlfriends dialogue intro was written by a recent ESL student

princess rebel is pretty good

so ex-girlfriend used to be in porn? and is married to dude from biohazard?

maura is the hero of this thread

everything little lupe touches turns to gold imho

brostep womp womps in the lupe fuentes thing got a laugh out of me

Managed to last 36 seconds of these gobshites before I stopped it:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LAd729p38-8

oh but you missed the best part

oh wow, spraggan on steroids

"princess rebel is pretty good"

She's absolutely dreadful, but if you mean the track is still kinda entertaining anyway, I can see your point.

JESUS FUCK @ Loveable Rogues

beer pong
pokemon
every body
sing along

WHAT ELSE DO I HAVE TO SAY

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1gYE5TyijxE

That Ex-Girlfriends video is scary, like "Big head mode unlocked"/

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1gYE5TyijxE

Oh dear God, the Loveable Rogues really are the worst thing ever. I actually feel kind of sick, they're that bad.

'Shift It', on the other hand, rules.

Shift It: What on Earth did I just watch?

"Shift It" is the new "Friday."

shift it is rhett and link; that's their thing

I was gonna say, 'Shift It' seems pretty knowingly done, but I like it anyway. It's catchy!

Wait, so is the ad a fake joke ad?

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rhett_and_Link

No, it's a real ad for a real business. Rhett and Link go around the country doing them for people.

i had heard this was lousy, but wow:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WWpBTnEjTLM

yeah, this is honestly the right thread for that i guess

Why do ppl keep letting him sing?

eh i don't think it's all that bad

me neither, it's insubstantial but not horrible

feels a little beneath this thread to litter it with crabcore, but

http://www.youtube.com/watch?&v=zcbOfVKSMkA

rip epitaph records

Haha! Twenty seconds in I told myself those guys had to be from Vegas or LA. Vegas it is.

wtf, did andre fall off a motorcycle or something?

Tune into The Singles Jukebox tomorrow, guys. It's a three-for-three for this thread's sake (though one of the songs has been mentioned itt already).

Easily my favorite terrible song of the year so far: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f-6SjaC1bZ8

Oh, it's a GAY SONG, too iirc.

lol @ "Bubble Pop" reference

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WaIo2zFMkDo

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eGuPViQChR0

nice off-pitch vocal from the halestorm woman there

That vocal is many things -- overwrought, unlistenable, not reproducible by an actual human being actually singing without gobs of digital gadgets -- but it is not off pitch as it is autotuned within an inch of its life.

wtf is this and how did it escape the year 2002

Well, Device is the dude from Disturbed so 2002 sounds about right.

no there is one actually bad note in there though

Oh, I think all the notes in this particular recording are pretty bad, just not off-key. (If you could give me time co-ordinates, I'll go and check it out, but I am not listening to this monstrosity again.)

Hair metal and nu metal rolled into one horrible track - in retrospect it's hard to believe it took this long. And that album cover is seriously disturbing.

BEYBEH
don't try to out litaford litaford lady

also canks submission bears further discussion

in which the guy from beatnigs and disposable heroes of hiphoprisy simultaneously tries to cash in on mindless dance-pop, whistled hooks, and mumford-esque wordless chanting. it also references "hey soul sister"

https://soundcloud.com/mmmusic/michael-franti-spearhead-im

i guess as far as i know that's what spearhead always sounds like but it just comes across like a cynical mish-mash of "popular" sounds

car commercial music!

fuckin franti.

man, i used to like franti in the pre-corona days

http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=Yo8hRtaLWoU

whoops, sorry:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Yo8hRtaLWoU

i was listening to the radio yesterday and some band (x-factor alumni, took 3rd place according to DJ) came on, sounding like a post-"hey there delilah" version of sugar ray. didn't catch their name but the song was abysmal.

What's wrong with the Lana Del Rey song???

I mean it sounds like everything she's always wanted to do, retro sounds, affected vocals, sexy seductress who's also a little girl, pointing out that the old art we now think of as 'wholesome' was really pretty weird, etc etc. And it works as a song too.

I like the Lana Del Rey song too..

I don't but then again I hate her voice

it's not nearly the trainwreck her other songs are, though

check out The Wanted's Rihanna song. My pick for worst of the year to date.

That VIshno song sounds like someone tried to monetize tutorial music from some consumer music sampling software from 2001.

xp yeah "walks like rihanna" is just unforgivable

That VIshno song sounds like someone tried to monetize tutorial music from some consumer music sampling software from 2001.

― avant-sarsgaard (litel), Saturday, May 18, 2013 5:10 AM (13 hours ago) Bookmark

i'd rather listen to the jonestown death tapes than hear it again, so i figured that made it a good fit for the thread

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RBruaC6wdGw

Namedrops Jay-Z and Beyonce, "Hey Soul Sister," mawkish, sounds like OMC's "How Bizarre" crossed with foot-stomping whistle-indie ... This Michael Franti song is so lame on so many levels I half hope it's a big hit:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yqEFy3Js4dw

i posted that a week ago dude!

but it is bad enough to be posted on here twice

Yeah, I will readily admit that I don't avidly follow the worst songs thread, because the ... worst songs thread. But I heard that on the radio and had to get it out of my system.

XRT? that's where i heard it

Must have been. Early this morning.

Another Beyonce/Jay-Z namedrop in the Summer Set's "Boomerang"

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JQnSc0bczg0

Woops, that was my other worst song of the year which apparently someone already shared.

Summer Set:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O6l6pSpxHXo

i almost thought that was the ready set, who was responsible for that godawful song "love like woe"

That Summer Set song is vile.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ALcDZ-Kv3is

I think this is the dorkiest thing I've seen in quite some time.

http://soundcloud.com/mountkimbie/you-took-your-time

actual horror

I don't get what's so horrifying about that

the voice, for starters

the horrible awkward beat

everything

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cWyrE1eq1ys

oh lord make it stop

Even for a Beady Eye session muso featuring, Kasabian supporting tosspot like him, that's AWFUL.

(Miles Kane)

http://static.nme.com/images/gallery/2013ProfessorGreenInstagram290513.jpg

Mercifully the youtube has been taken down, but it's like an extremely shitty retread of Setting Sun with an extra large helping of sneery-voiced rapping oozing all over it like some sort of faecal treacle.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zcbOfVKSMkA

haa i already posted that!

i have zero recollection how i ran into it tho. maura's twitter maybe?

oh shit one of the raps talks about twitter

lol i knew i should've checked first... its got 2 million+ views

why the fuck did I listen to that

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kId3rEz7iIk

I might like that song if Autre Ne Veute did a version.

Falling in Reverse vid gets a pretty zingy writeup in Vice: http://www.vice.com/read/ronnie-radke-falling-in-reverse-worst-song-ever

jesus christ when did everyone start reading Vice

i don't, but I saw it linked on fb.

vice writeup is vile but the video might be your kind of batshit djp

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FB5urOYly3Q

Wears out its welcome early (oh, for the two-minute rock song!) and not my kind of thing really, but that seems kinda harmless. If that was the minimum quality level for radio-ready rock today we'd have a lot less shit in this this thread for sure...

That beat sounds like it's actively trying not to work. For the standard boring rock song that it otherwise is, this is not a good thing.

i think it's fine but i'm a shameless k-os defender

Adultz Bop:

http://youtu.be/IjHhyuSnTlk

http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=IjHhyuSnTlk

Oh ffs...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IjHhyuSnTlk

That song is going to be everywhere :(

It's not particularly great, but otoh there's nothing exceptionally heinous about that either afaict?

i find icona pop really tiresome; that's particularly egregious

really bad

That song is going to be everywhere :(

It is exactly the same song as I Don't Care, which is inescapable in Europe.

...and very much Worst.

12th best song of 2012 apparently

i mean 13th

Sad news that Razorlight are no more but luckily we now have this to comfort ourselves.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IfiCAuqLIWI&feature=youtu.be

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i5ti8L3g6N4

pretty sure that song's been released 600 times a year for the last four years

not that bad

I've definitely heard worse, even from her.

it's just such a blatant "starships" from an artist I thought would be more interesting

http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=gKgRAU9Rd8k

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gKgRAU9Rd8k

i wouldn't call that a*m*e thing one of the worst songs of the year but after "play the game boy" and her turn on "need u 100%", "heartless" is definitely puzzling and dismaying

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xfizh8biLEM

This is awful, but also partly redeemed by generous use of the David Lee Roth soundboard.

i've heard that soundboard used in other songs and it's always amazing.

it's like instant bonus points.

Avicii's attempt to join the sturm und twang zeitgeist

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AT29gXp6mss

YouTube blocked at work so can't check but someone has posted the new Scouting For Girls, right? Just when you thought they'd already exhausted the mine of awfulness, they hit a rich new seam...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FzkXtufl5Ag

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IgGPmYpj1og

Cody Simpson's sister

The inevitable "ironic" rendition of "I Love It", worst of all by Florence FUCKING Welsh. Ten times more irritating than Alanis' version of "My Humps" and that's saying something. God, I cannot stand to listen to this woman for one more minute. Also a big shame on you to Dev Hynes for participating in this atrocity:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=EglJDerwAHs#at=136

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EglJDerwAHs

this doesn't strike me as an ironic cover at all; if anything, it's overly earnest

Regardless of whether the lyrics may fit the style, it's ironic in it's delivery. i.e. the complete opposite of Icona Pop's version.

that is not what "ironic" means

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VJ7-M8EvfN0

I can't make out all of the lines, but this is what his inane verse sounds to me...

Mixdown, hit them switches
Matrix for them glitches
Switches, they get stitches
At your door...JEHOVAH'S WITNESS
She bad, on my hit list
Lamborghini on my wish-list!
Dick care (??), that’s my fitness
White ghost (?), more like semen (I can't tell if that's really what he's saying)
See me, they start screaming
Auckland, that’s New Zealand
And I gotta go hard...CEMENT!

xpost-When Icona Pop sing "I don't care" you believe them or at least their personas within the song want you to believe them. With the emotion Florence puts into her delivery it clear that she DOES care or at she wants to convey that her persona does. IMO the lyrics fall short of that degree of emotion... and sorry but yes, that is what "ironic" means.

When Icona Pop shout the song it is pretty much just as terrible and empty as the overearnest nonsense Florence is doing with her goat vibrato

I dunno, I just can't worked up over a bad cover of a song that's already terrible

that alli simpson song, wow. just a perfect storm of misguided production, terrible mixing, tired cliche lyrics (save for a title hooky in the same way a buzzfeed/thoughtcatalog title is -- "28 REASONS WHY I'M SINGLE" -- i imagine this somewhat explains the view count on YT? and affectless singing

http://thoughtcatalog.com/2012/why-youre-single/

I'm not particularly crazy about the original either, but very few things in this world are worse than that goat vibrato. (xxpost)

Youtube comments like "Only Florence Welch can make stupid and senseless song sound so beautiful. That's why i love her." Certainly don't help. I know, i know.

the reason I like her bombastic songs so much is because the orchestration really takes the edge off of her voice, which is essentially an aural club

it's also why when she deigns to sing in head voice it's so startling, you don't really expect a tender sound to come out of that mouth

That Avicii song has 16596 thumbs up, 670 thumbs down on Youtube... All those thumbs up are from a vevo botnet, right? One of my friends sincerely was trying to convince me that the labels run a big botnet that pumps up YT views... and I guess I want to believe.

people really like avicii

terrible icona pop cover.

if i can go on believing its a vevo botnet i will dislike the human race less.

this is from last year but I am demanding it be grandfathered in:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3wdhWMohags

I really like that Sober & Snye-B song

reading that back, "really" is too strong. I will admit though that since Whigfield never hit in the US I doesn't give me the nostalgic sickness that it probably would if I were from Australia, Brazil, Venezuela, Canada, Italy, France, India, the Netherlands, the Nordic countries or the Philippines.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aB0yuWokq2Q

I can't believe the Johnny Borrell clip I posted a couple of weeks didn't get a reaction. I thought the title for worst single of the year was all wrapped up when I heard that. Let me just point out,

The song is called Pan European Super Model (Oh! Gina)
The clip I posted has Jo Whiley introducing it (I know that doesn't have anything to do with the song but I bet she loves it)
It's by the bloke from fucking Razorlight!
It sounds like The Boomtown Rats
His album is called Borrell 1 (Implying there will be more!)

Finally this is the track listing for his album (Track 11 sounds like a winner)

1. Power To The Woman
2. Joshua Amrit
3. Pan-European Supermodel Song (Oh! Gina)
4. Ladder To Your Bed
5. Dahlia Rondo
6. Cyrano Masochiste
7. We Cannot Overthrow
8. Each And Every Road
9. Wild Today
10. Dahlia Allegro
11. Erotic Letter

Kinda feel like the new Janelle Monae song released today sadly deserves to be in here but I might be alone on that one

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uG2Pgd6Tm7Q

xp The "I Love It" cover is pretty useless.

That MGMT song is good though

mgmt can do no wrong. congratulations was super fun. the only thing i wished was that it was trippier -- more psychadelic and less pop -- which they seem to be rectifying with their new music. we live in exciting times.

Every freaking young German-speaking with an acoustic guitar has released an earnest version of "I Love It" in the last six months.

Every time I hear a MGMT song, my first reaction is "they're kidding, right?"

they always sort of are.

that avicii song thats top of the charts is awful, like a stadium rave version of mumford and sons

i just found out that the skylar grey/eminem song is supposed to be 'satire.' oh.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o0ME8VdjDMc

i'm going to assume, perhaps optimistically, that it's only my local top 40 station that's bad enough to put this into heavy rotation...

oh ffs

Oh lord, please let that stay in your market.

That is a truly cruel thing to do to Bill Withers. What a weird reference to base a song on, too. And the video...ugh. I can't even really figure out what's supposed to be happening. Is this what LMFAO have wrought?

I'm convinced this might be the one really gross looking guy from last year's horribly headsticky "Neato."

Has this asshole ever even watched I Love Lucy?

oh no this whole thing

jesus christ

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q22DP6WG0g4

barf barf barf barf barf

Beat is like a shitty version of Ke$ha's "Blow" with a bit of "Like a G6" when it gets to the quiet part, video is for no reason at all set in the future, everything that happens is gross and awful and all the worse for the implication that you're supposed to find it wacky and hilarious, and it's 5:15?! Fuck this guy.

oh wow this one is just as bad D:

well i just moved out, hopefully i'll never hear from him again

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Sd2yr12abg8

I HATE this song.

Doesn't leave much of an impression on one listen, but if I heard it ten or twenty or a hundred times I'd probably want to KILL.

KAPTN seems like an attempt to create a more "relatable" mickey avalon. props for the b in apt 23 reference, i guess.

Tom Odell takes this in a fucking walk

wait a minute wow

thank you so much for linking the KAPTN video

WE ON THAT JUICE

"she got hot sauce in her taco"

I mean really

too much?

did this motherfucker really just say "I am the white Tyrese"

oh dear lord, it got to the black and white part of the video and I swear my eyes started bleeding from the awful

COME MEET YOUR FAJITA

WTF

WHY HASN'T ANYONE KILLED THIS GUY

dan look at his twitter name

https://twitter.com/KAPTNofficial

"Glad someone different has come along and can do different the right way. You'll blow up soon enough." - Some guy on Facebook

https://d22d7v2y1t140g.cloudfront.net/m_5610153_sl4hYN4wgA5z.jpg.640.jpg

poor dog

bonus points for rocking OP swim trunks from 1986, I guess

HAVASUUUUUUUUUU

When that Ricky Ricardo video started, I thought that was the guy from the Gevalia coffee commercials.

Is it just me or does the voice at the beginning saying "This is you KAPTN" sound kind of like Adam West?

Takes me a while to identify most of the hits I hear on the radio, and then usually some more time to realize how much I hate something. I reached critical mass today on Pitbull/Christine Aguilera's "Feel This Moment"; I really hate it.

Kaptn I can't even I just

"Ricky Ricardo" is somehow puzzling more than infuriating me—it's like the backwards-aging, aphasic offspring of Family Guy, Lil B ("I'm Miley Cyrus!!!"), and this dude:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1-sBXoMbdfQ

o_o @ this stretch of "Juice", which I have attempted to transcribe in a way that captures all the awkward silences:

... pop my shirt off / abs hard, don't never go soft

... crunch 'em out / don't talk just shut yr mouth

... dance with me / N'Sync, Lance Bass with me

... hey baby, my, my / you freaky... #LadyGaga

(in the last of those lines, please note the deliberate mispronunciation of "Lady Gaga" to match the inflection of "my MY!" and rack up more half-assed slant-rhyme points)

the whole rich gang album is pretty dire. but. BUT

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ukcvcXZZcoI

I finally worked up the courage to listen to "Juice" and there's my week ruined

https://soundcloud.com/saintmotel/my-type-1

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XqGx1lfyb6s

Low hanging fruit, but this one ...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uZgzSwTW0Qs

That seems harmless enough. I could imagine going nuts if I had to hear it every hour, though. xp

Oh my god

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FmCen8bTcds

the lingering effects of mindless self indulgence

I just heard Avenged Sevenfold, Deftones and Ghost B.C. are touring together. This is the worst of all three squished together. Fitting.

lol they're a Victory Records band, which is the least surprising bit of news you'll read today.

They are very very funny

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ye5fxkj0CQs

fucking fucking fucking hell
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y0zlkB-s_Vk

read lyrics here
http://blog.angryasianman.com/2013/07/okay-so-this-is-pretty-much-worst-thing.html

ok wow

"This song is us, Day Above Ground, making fun of ourselves (and many, many other guys) obsession with the always lovely, Asian Woman. It pushes this concept to an absurd level, but at the same time is endearing & submissive.. WE ARE NOT RACIST, HAHA! I mean, look at our band, it's multicultural!! The guy in the bow-tie, our cutie bass player, was born in Indonesia, and he steals the show!! Please don't take this tongue-in-cheek tribute to some of the most gorgeous women on the planet too seriously!! You'll ruin the fun of it all!! Thanks for watching, sincerely!!"

Published on Jul 29, 2013

This song is us, Day Above Ground, making fun of ourselves (and many, many other guys) obsession with the always lovely, Asian Woman. It pushes this concept to an absurd level, but at the same time is endearing & submissive.. WE ARE NOT RACIST, HAHA! I mean, look at our band, it's multicultural!! The guy in the bow-tie, our cutie bass player, was born in Indonesia, and he steals the show!! Please don't take this tongue-in-cheek tribute to some of the most gorgeous women on the planet too seriously!! You'll ruin the fun of it all!! Thanks for watching, sincerely!!

lol xp

btw i didnt discover it im just sharing ned's pain

truly a banner day for horrible, horrible garbage

yup

it will be one of those "do you remember where you were when you heard...." days and the answer will be "on ilm".

literally the worst of all time

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-WDcpwZqYlU

this thread is the best and worst thing ever

tradition tradition tradition

i can't tell if the new pitbull florida is a joke or what

OMG at Asian Girlz. 1990s sound, 1940s commentary, 2013 YouTube.

Take out the Ginny Blackmore song and the Feldman/Snow White's Poison Bite/"Asian Girlz" might be the worst possible run of songs imaginable.

i had to listen to that blackmore song about twenty times
trust me it is a special kind of horrible as well
just less ostentatious

OMG 'Asian Girlz' is trolling music

quick poll: what do y'all think is the best place to get my "korean barbecue / bitch, I love u" tattoo??

dear god there's still more than 2 minutes of this left?!?

"17 or 23 / it doesn't matter to me" YOU KNOW THERE'S A WORD FOR THAT

okay I had to switch to the Flo Rida, couldn't take anymore 'Asian Girlz'

"my last name must be Robbins, cuz I'm Baskin' in these asses" seems downright suave in comparison

ok i genuinely like this corey feldman song

dude no

look it's time we reevaluate corey feldman's musical career that i just learned about

you just have to forget it's corey feldman, avoid watching the video and also not have high hopes for a song called "ascension millenium"

On a far more innocuous front, here is Germany discovering twee.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gTxALK5Nad8

This track will appear in some tv commercial in 3... 2...

exactly why i'm not clicking it

how many times do fucking twee bands have to make that exact video tho

The vocal alone makes this a serious contender for the worst single I've heard all year.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=3a7Girby63s#at=50

yeah that's jessie j taking her horrible shtick to a new level of horrible. could barely make it through a third of that.

:'( i saw someone wearing that dinosaur shirt yesterday

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PqypvhXD2-Y

hahaha this prick

oh hold on that's probably djp's dream music isnt it

I wouldn't know, I can't play it

eh, this is just boring

his voice in the chorus is a bit dave gahan if that's what you mean rtc. super annoying video: hey read my terrible lyrics over and over again!

it has the sound palette of 90s rave without any of the risks/experimentation/amateurism that made it interesting to listen to

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AGvr3ILX9Pc

jesus at the last couple. is it 1992 again? that stuff was bad enough then.

lol at dollar store rave Fleetwood Mac half-cover. I can't even hate this. I'd rather just forget it exists.

Oh man, that keyboard sound can't be swept into the dustbin of history soon enough.

honestly every single karl wolf song i have heard is worthy of inclusion on a rolling worst song of _____ thread

I honestly can't get past KAPTN

noooooooo, Tauheed

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H83YWalKuKc

goddammit tommy lee

ughhhh gross

Nickelbacklemore

wait til you guys hear jimmy buffett's 'i'm no russian'

okay, here you go

https://play.spotify.com/track/0jXpSzDbckGwSLTZuvDmTU?utm_source=open.spotify.com&utm_medium=open

that really is something special

did my doooo-ty *guitar wah*
but missed the boooo-ty *pfbfbththfart*

it feels a little like he flipped over to "oligarch" on his Word of the Day calendar just as "Parents Just Don't Understand" came on the radio and he went "a-ha!"

video helps
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bpJWP71ZZeM

helps to make it worse basically. includes the lyric "let's play the rape game"

i can't tell if the new pitbull florida is a joke or what

― sassy, fun, and RELATABLE (forksclovetofu), Wednesday, July 31, 2013 12:06 AM (3 weeks ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

video looks like it was produced by tim heidecker

i mean eric

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O7Ef2IVa3Z4

that's an impressive title/roster

:[

I did not expect nicki minaj to take the "I got that welfare check / smokin on that crack" angle

well damn Nicki, that's an impressively repellent verse

congrats everyone, last month of the thread has been just a string of list-toppers, nothing else in the thread save KAPTN comes close. "Asian Girlz" is so over-the-top horrible that it sort of defies comparison to anything else here. For just plain old horrible, that Flo Rida/Pitbull thing is just >_< especially with the early-90s screensaver blue-screen crap going on in the video. Boy that looks bad.

Jessie J song is more garden-variety air-filler, nothing egregious besides her weird attempt at P!nk cosplay. Depressed to say it does make her look more attractive, even if it's a super boring song/video.

I like how amateurish "I'm No Russian" sounds, just as a recording I mean... like at this point Jimmy Buffett spends maximum an hour in the studio on any particular song, since the kind of people who buy Jimmy Buffett albums are going to do so regardless. "Will I end up like Pussy Riot, that's what I'm thinking"? Wow.

Toby Keith's Drinks After Work has to be in the running for the worse song of 2013. He even sounds bored singing it.

Alas, Karmin have not gone away yet:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KJWJfRAGnHc

I totally rep for "Brokenhearted," but this is some boring, bad shit. She sounds like she's trying for a Gwen Stefani thing in a couple places but, just totally not the same league. And boy do I hate their look.

The "twist" with the falsetto or...whatever ... and the long pause is just uggggggh.

is "acapella" an accepted spelling of 'a cappella' now? like, i found the misspelling vaguely amusing and easily ignorable when kelis did it but now i am just confused

am I wrong or is this awful
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1YkcG0xzrII

no. yes.

Neon Jungle - Trouble
Ray Foxx - Boom Boom

"hand job academy"?

I thought maybe there'd be something to ironically love in there since someone seemed excited about it but I watched the whole thing and yeah, oof

Awkward but (relatively) harmless. Didn't pay close attention to the lyrics though so don't quote me on that.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jofNR_WkoCE#t=22

hand job academy kinda gives me hot fruit vibes tbh

i have the fox chorus stuck in my head now

Nice addition of Avicii into the Spotify list - modern techno channeling Mumford & Sons. Really bad.

didn't know we had a spotify playlist for this! Repost please?

http://open.spotify.com/user/maurajohnston/playlist/0WPppq8bQwHHSeMMxN2xwi

Totally came here to post the Fox video, then realized, hmm, if my wife forwarded it to me, someone else must already be on it.

yah it's making the rounds

i hate "the fox" too -- and now am trying to work out my thoughts on what makes novelty records good or bad to me

also lol @ stargate having produced it

did not know!

Everyone's moved on to "Wrecking Ball" but here's the requisite earnest acoustic take on "We Can't Stop" featuring Rebecca Black!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5JcK5BW9Z0I

Apparently the strip club line was beyond the pale for Rebecca Black. (Is it just me or is that guy pretending to play a guitar even though he doesn't seem to be holding one?)

delivery on "can't you see it's we who bout that life" killing me

i think the "vintage doo wop cover" of that song that people are posting on the internet is probably worse than that, and of course everyone being like 'omg u have made this song good - real music yay!' does not help

omg that guy ... watch him look down and then look at the camera and shake his head over and over and over and over. this makes me want to die.

wait, does she say "feeling alive and/or in love"?????

Congrats on making a song with the lyric "it's our party / we can kiss who we want" sound like Christian pop, I guess.

I guess this was inevitable but

http://open.spotify.com/track/1yhb8BfSNDQBCjCUD0zSCt

Gross

I think that guy is playing a ukulele

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nHb6mEUcpKk

BOTDF dude is a major creep right?

fuck this.

MICKEY AVALON IS BACK

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DIAvSgB_2Ts

Without the branding this wouldn't be half as obnoxious... the beat is pretty good.

have we talked about linkin park & steve aoki yet

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RsKQOm_iJug

I subscribe to this thread out of ghoulish fascination, even my fascination isn't ghoulish enough to click a YouTube link labelled "LINKIN PARK X STEVE AOKI."

How did the same guy who started Dim Mak Records wind up the clown he is today?

But it's pretty good, though...

I can't be the only one who likes the song? I don't understand why it's in this thread, unless the joke is 'lol Linkin Park amirite'

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zcbOfVKSMkA

http://soundcloud.com/cashcash/cash-cash-satellites/

God, this is like Glee doing a song with Example and it's fucking ATROCIOUS.

should've been the soundtrack to gravity

How did the same guy who started Dim Mak Records wind up the clown he is today?

― Johnny Fever, Thursday, October 3, 2013 4:23 PM (1 week ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

You act like Dim Mak wasn't mostly clowny back then with a FEW bright spots.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wWLhrHVySgA

watch out for pedo-panda-bear

I think you have the wrong thread.

oh no he doesn't

yeah he doesn't. this one is seriously hard to laugh at.

I mean, it's basically "let's marry our natural brain-dead absurdity to some racism, that will drive up views"

having said that, I did have a lot of outraged laughter while watching this but, unlike previous efforts, I have zero desire to go back and rewatch

Yeah, even as someone who's Chinese, I felt that initial pang of outrage but after that, I shrugged and went on with my life. I DIDN'T EVEN POST IT ON TWITTER/FACEBOOK.

But that might be more tied to how short my outrage cycle is these days than the quality of the song/video (or lack thereof).

oh I totally posted it, and I will probably be quoting "I use the chopsticks/To eat potsticks" for the next week or so

zzzz

the ending though

So much to hate here

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JcDoqMWc_YQ

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2dllo85ZSUk

What the hell was that? Are those drummers... upside down?

wrong thread, I don't think we have a rolling greatest songs of 2013 thread

^^^ came 3rd in the Estonian selection for Eurovision this year.

I really wonder what an internal US state Eurovision-style competition would produce

singing grannies from florida

jason mraz returns to the airwaves w/ a travie mccoy collaboration

it's not AS bad as it sounds but i thought this was the right thread in which to mention it

Kat Dahlia strikes again with a bonus track on the DJ Khaled album called "Helen Keller"

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A2QJyRvmdGo

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WfsON2Q0E0I

guns: protecting your family against melons, soft drink, and explosive melons since the constitution

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GE9k99uVpGs

I usually find it very easy to ignore music I don't like but for some reason this has really, really upset me. I feel like self harming because of this shit tbh. As my friend said, "It's no longer a case of 'God help us if there's a war'. It's now a case of, 'We need a war.'":

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1M3fHSD-VU4

holy shit that was terrible

I'm genuinely very sorry but I couldn't shoulder the knowledge/experience on my own any longer.

one of those balloons should have been a longer one

If you really feel like you've been bad and need to atone or pay penance, try their cover of Me, Myself & I:

(but seriously you'll fuck up your weekend if you do)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D9qT6TBr9RE

http://youtu.be/D9qT6TBr9RE

I legitimately wanted to hurt myself while that was playing and I don't think it was merely due to subconscious suggestion from reading Doran's original post

dying @ the me myself & I video

OH DEAR LORD NO, THIS COVER

I'm told they've done a flash mob, dancing in public, filmed on camera phones video as well but I just can't bear to watch it.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Znoz1IJbK_k

Pretty, pretty awful.

the lyric sheets are a nice touch, shows they really worked at this

the core, the heart music

music like this needs destroyed, almost as much as those fuckers who make it

still, i cant wait to see the lex's reaction to it.

yessssssssssssss

work internet access is working overtime to keep me from playing the entirety of the "No Scrubs" video

proof of sentient artificial intelligence?

oh dear god, the BRIDGE

Ever wanted to hear Groundskeeper Willie sing In The Navy?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fMwKDk4mW3c

oh my god hahahahahahaha

my reaction exactly

Alestorm are the best <3

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wZfegwx0ROg

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m2-PTP8bh80

Reece Simwogerere 2 months ago

I'm 13 and I think this is real music unlike that Lil Wayne rubbish.
· in reply to dayofthegarbage
dayofthegarbage

dayofthegarbage 2 months ago

@Reece Simwogerere YOU SPEAK THE TRUTH. THIS IS SO OUT THERE MAN. NEW WAVE MEETS BRIT POP :)))

·
Reece Simwogerere

Reece Simwogerere 2 months ago

Keep working at videos like these and you'll have a 9.5 BNM from Pitchfork soon. P.S. this is video of the year :)

nooo

Hero & Leander 'win' this thread.

yes, they need a thread of their own Can pop music get any worse than Hero & Leander?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DaVA6sgOpws

Is this gonna be a thing where someone does a gloomy, slo-mo cover of Tears For Fears every decade now?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bQ73Kpj7sUw

Was all like "what's so bad about this?" but then "I thought love was bullshit" happened.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lHjUuojffds

That sounds like it was made with the express intention of being used in a Gatorade commercial.

how come so many songs suck

Sandi Thom has a covers album, fyi

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hX3O5v-ylC4#t=67

Oh heck.

That seems more sad than bad, though it is indeed bad

Yes. It's really really bad though.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-Robi0Kp-zs

Ew. Eeeeeew. I feel unclean after hearing that.

I heard Blurred Lines for the first time tonight and it is so fucking shit

I mean, for fucks sake

>:|

This is the second time a song I've posted to this board has ended up in this thread, sigh.

I'll see your Daughtry and raise you a yarling, bro-metal cover of an Animals classic.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gZ4LaUQRZU0

This is probably one of those songs like "Behind Blue Eyes" that easily lends itself to these kind of mook-rock covers.

Is this Daughtry song even rock? It's like some featureless null style.

aka adult contemporary

altho i don't think faulting something for not being rock makes much sense tbh

well maybe given its title we could. idk.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ix0i4XtubDQ
Cupid Kidz - Forest of Fun

not safe for work, or anywhere else (legit gross)

dunno if we missed their "ganja poo poo" last year but that would have been an easy top ten contender (don't watch that either)

Jesus, it's a close battle between what's worst with that one: the voices, the lyrics, or the video. I had to turn it off because I was afraid I'd get it stuck in my head

woof, that's horrible.

i got to 1:10.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M-bxztZbmW8

eh
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M-bxztZbmW8

maybe i should listen to this more than once halfway but my inclination is this belongs here
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V_4i69wcovw

we should probably have a vote for worst of the year based on nominees in this thread.

Not sure whether the Pitbull/Kesha song "Timber" is too boring even to bother including here.

i will admit to liking that song

eww

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kwgz-Tev_Cs

At last, Post-Moosernism has hit its stride.

wow, the female vocal in that is like the most insipid sound I can imagine

have we talked about Twenty One Pilots yet

Ugh, and I thought Bastille was bad enough

The lead singer's rapping on "Holding on to You" are just as bad as the raps on any Karmin song (worst moment is the random "Lean wit It, Rock wit It" reference towards the end)

Two of a....CRIME!

Ugh...

you guys, it's 2014 now

"Two of a Crime" came out last October though, it's fair game. But yeah, is there a new thread?

wow, the female vocal in that is like the most insipid sound I can imagine

May want to steer totally clear of any Rilo Kiley/Jenny Lewis albums, then, because that girl's doing a pretty solid impression.

Oh, I just now read that Perma is a collaboration between the dork from Say Anything and one of the sisters from Eisley. Yeah, they can fuck right off.

wow, the female vocal in that is like the most insipid sound I can imagine

― signed, J.P. Morgan CEO (Hurting 2), Saturday, January 11, 2014 10:55 PM (2 weeks ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

You meant the male vocal, right?

is there a 2014 version of this thread? i cant find it

GTFO rolling worst music of 2014