I TROLLED JOSE CANSECO

http://twitter.com/JoseCanseco/status/10061434886

http://twitter.com/jordansarge/status/10061819742

http://twitter.com/JoseCanseco/status/10090588014

oh man

holy shit, jose canseco said he's going to torture you and kill you!!

*high five*

this is legitimately the best thing that's ever happened in my life

congrats--you are going to die, via Jose Canseco roid rage

man kill u

do you think he knows that the torture is supposed to come first?

:DDDDDDDDDDD

http://www.uncoached.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/05/jose-canseco-6.jpg

that was pretty good advice too!

http://www.blogcdn.com/www.tmz.com/media/2008/10/1014_jose_conseco_bn_tmz.jpg

im thinking u need to come back at him w/a classic 'just sayin' style response

lol he blocked me

http://www.dallasnews.com/s/dws/spt/misc/history/stories/may/052693rang.jpg

jizzchin, low life child molester

http://z.about.com/d/weirdnews/1/0/v/R/-/-/JoseCansecoMugShot.jpg

http://blacksportsonline.com/index/l80-2-719322.jpg

http://twitter.com/JoseCanseco/status/10090718491

^^blacksportsonline.com

xp

fierce, dude

LOLLLLLLLLLL

Nice work Jordan.

http://www.exposay.com/celebrity-photos/jose-canseco-2006-mtv-movie-awards-boom-boom-room-gifting-suite-0skS7h.jpg

sub-custos?

I lol'ed at that.

Aww, I liked Custos.

http://twitter.com/JoseCanseco/status/10047017759

That's awesome Jordan.

I remember Jose signed my '88 Fleer. My only Jose moment.

kind of sad but mostly sad

CANSECO DROPPIN' KNOWLEDGE

― dr. william idol (dr g), Tuesday, 29 November 2005 12:19 (4 years ago)

I remember Jose signed my '88 Fleer. My only Jose moment

only baseball autograph I ever got was Sid Bream :/

dude Sid Bream is 100% kvlt! lots of people have Canseco autografs but only the truest have Sid Bream!

I have a baseball card show dealer badge signed by Canseco. (saw him at a Bennigan's near Arlington Stadium after a game) He was very nice, and the blonde he was with had enormous boobs (I was 10, the boobs are pretty much all I remember of the experience).

Just be glad you never got this autograph

http://bitsandpieces.us/wp-content/uploads/2008/07/imagesdickpole.jpg

ihttp://bitsandpieces.us/wp-content/uploads/2008/07/imagesdickpole.jpg

fuck, i give up (again!!)

How the fuck do you post pictures here?

arrgg. happened last night in the vinyl board too

http://bitsandpieces.us/wp-content/uploads/2008/07/imagesdickpole.jpg

http://bitsandpieces.us/wp-content/uploads/2008/07/imagesdickpole.jpg

why did the Mariners logo resemble satan's pitchfork?

nevermind, I get the Neptune 'trident' reference now.....bah

and jess begat ethan and ethan begat deej and deej begat jordan s and jordan s begat von smack

http://the115.files.wordpress.com/2008/10/josediginity3.jpg

lol tmz breaking news picture..

http://www.blogcdn.com/www.tmz.com/media/2008/10/1010_jose_bn_tmz_01.jpg

I like first line of his bio

"1st member of the 40/40 club."

that there deserves..

http://www.blogcdn.com/www.tmz.com/media/2008/10/1010_jose_bn_tmz_01.jpg

i'm still loling about the fact that Jose Canseco makes threats to civilians on twitter.

"DO YOU KNOW WHO I AM? I'M JOSE CANSECO!"

omfg

trying not to wake the g/f with retardedlaughter!

did you get any correspondence from aggrieved jose canseco fans

haha no

i was tortured last night though

omigod only just opened this thread

Some sort of medal in order

ilx attack on Jose Canseco....

http://imgur.com/VelA8.jpg

the tweet's been deleted

Jose Canseco used to call himself the "Human-Flesh Search Engine" just like the real internet the results were usually underage!

http://twitter.com/GaryCarterRaw/status/10250642992

aw what did he say

'@jordansarge im definitely going to do it with my daughter'

haha

he said that if he found me he'd kill me and/or torture me, and that all child molesters like me should be killed

he's kind of losing his mind

http://twitter.com/josecanseco

wow.

loooooooooooooooooool

someone's angling for some press coverage

huh

I am signing off but won't u be my neighbor

hahhahahahaa

I would rather be stupid and honest than smart and a lyar whitch one r u 20 minutes ago via TweetCaster

@brandstatter I bet I could work ur wife little dick about 1 hour ago via TweetCaster in reply to brandstatter

U motherfuckerfs can dish it out but u can't take it I new u where cowards fucking genetic malfunctions should have been killed at birth about 2 hours ago via TweetCaster

This world is full of lyars scum hypocrits and cowards not to mention corrupt politicians that's y the end is near. Look in the mirror about 2 hours ago via TweetCaster

JOSE CANSECO TROLLED EVERYONE

i like to read all of these as dr. morbius posts

oh man, now he's gone apocalyptic

woah. wtf set him off?

I wish I could bring this anger into the ring btween what baseball has done to me and u fucking haters I could kill somèone rite now about 2 hours ago via TweetCaster

somèone

différance

# Goodbye all of my stupid inbread followers remember stupid is as stupid does.dammm I love u guys
34 minutes ago via TweetCaster

inbread

the "dammm I love u guys" makes it

http://images.buycostumes.com/mgen/merchandiser/21177.jpg

hahahahaha

he is a spambot :(

# Let's create our own society.tell the truth always or die 23 minutes ago via TweetCaster

The government looks at us like if we where rats that need to be controoled or exterminated about 1 hour ago via TweetCaster

I am like a lot of people that society has destroyed or alianated for telling the truth or standing up for there beliefs about 1 hour ago via TweetCaster

If I where president respect and honesty would be established again just like in japan learn from that culture about 1 hour ago via TweetCaster

@MARIALOUISE46 y do we have so many religions and only one god about 1 hour ago via TweetCaster

@KerryPrice00 ok I guess I need a hug about 1 hour ago via TweetCaster in reply to KerryPrice00

@brandstatter I bet I could work ur wife little dick

this is, literally, how nazi germany started

If I where president respect and honesty would be established again just like in japan learn from that culture

Not all that different from an early Rollins tour diary.

i just signed up so i could tweet him ;)

woah. wtf set him off?

― The Cursed Return of the Dastardly Thermo Thinwall, Monday, April 19, 2010 2:51 PM (26 minutes ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

gonna go with 'years of steroid use'

lol

SpiffBox celebrities include baseball player Jose Canseco, Maxim models, and cast members from the Sopranos, Saved by the Bell, Amazing Race, The Biggest Loser, Entourage, Girls Next Door, Rock of Love and Deal No Deal.

I am creating the jose canseco club very fiew can enter but u can never leave.welcome to hotel california, what a lonely place

i like to read all of these as dr. morbius posts

MEAN

If I where president respect and honesty would be established again just like in japan learn from that culture

― Lamp, Monday, April 19, 2010 2:59 PM (2 hours ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

^important

http://twitter.com/JoseCanseco/status/14774989030

Can we handle the truth as a society in the movie a few good men the statement. We can't handle the truth. Rings a bell look in. The mirror
25 minutes ago via TweetCaster

JoseCanseco
Jose Canseco

some creeley shit there

got me deep like the abyss

On the golf course
about 5 hours ago via TweetCaster

How's this kiss my ass
about 8 hours ago via TweetCaster

Who wants to fight me on my show
7:02 PM Jun 10th via TweetCaster

JoseCanseco
Jose Canseco

http://twitter.com/JoseCanseco/status/15881559007

Spendadaywithj✧✧✧@ya✧✧✧.c✧✧ Email for pricing and availability on spend a day with Jose!
7:58 PM Jun 6th via TweetCaster

Canseco is looking to get back to MLB as a coach or manager and was looking for a way back into the game. He will play in Laredo for the players minimum to show his commitment to the game first and foremost. Canseco will also be shooting a baseball reality show while with the ULB & the Broncos.

http://www.laredobroncos.com/news/?id=13601

http://www.rap-up.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2010/10/lil-jon-pizza-2.jpg

Lil Jon
Gary Busey

Jose "Conseco"

That's not cool, J0rdan. This mama grizzly would wyle out if you talked about her cubs that way!

JoseCanseco Jose Canseco
Compliments of vanessa call leila 9257191217 don't forget bring the pot
5 minutes ago Favorite Retweet Reply

JoseCanseco Jose Canseco
wholesome
1 hour ago

JoseCanseco Jose Canseco
Would love to meet a nice holesome midwest girl here in chicago. We play tomorrow night at 7 pm in zion if anyone is out there for me
1 hour ago

JoseCanseco
How can u put a restraining order on someone u havnt seen in 4 months and lives in another state

http://twitter.com/#!/JoseCanseco/status/97194186729725952

http://twitter.com/#!/JoseCanseco/status/76367577789644800

lord some of this shit is super :-(

5am

man, this guy's feed is fucking bizarre

and the thread comes full circle

http://bloguin.com/theoutsidecorner/images/stories/Canseco_Gem_Tweet_6.jpg

someone better go over to his place and check up on him

i was wondering. i had only just added him and wasn't sure if he was always like this.

http://www.chicagotribune.com/news/ct-talk-jose-canseco-titanic-0417-20120416,0,4101059.story

Would love to host SNL and would donate pay to greenpeace. Does anyone know how to contact Lorne Greene ? Please help me make it happen! Hugs.

!

Will dig him up, see what he says.

https://twitter.com/#!/JoseCanseco/status/191991522223337473

Jose Canseco @JoseCanseco · 54m
What does it mean when a person says that they trust you but they have deep rooted trust issues

Jose Canseco @JoseCanseco · Sep 20
Perception is reality in this world . You all think you know me . Hahahhahahahahhaa

Jose Canseco @JoseCanseco · Sep 20
I'll fight anyone

was coming for j0rdan

http://www.nydailynews.com/sports/baseball/jose-canseco-accidentally-shoots-finger-cleaning-gun-report-article-1.1990815

wow - middle finger gone!

http://cdn.bleacherreport.net/images_root/slides/photos/001/561/870/jose-canseco-middlefinger_display_image.jpg?1321310554

LOL

probably overdue for an update anyway:

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v212/etienne_saint/neverforgett-2jpgoriginal_zpsea2d6d0d.jpg

@JoseCanseco
I love my fiance Leila @ModelLeila so much if it wasn't for her I would have lost my finger and passed out and had a head injury to

@JoseCanseco
Me and @ModelLeila stayed home and decorated and spooked the kids getting candy

why is Jose not in Dumb & Dumber To?

modern day Canseco is a top shelf Tim and Eric character at this point.

How is it that no one has made a buddy comedy movie analog to the Jose Canseco story?

pain & gain is about the closest i can think of

Does this count

http://cdn.pastemagazine.com/www/blogs/lists/82-100-Best-B-Movies-double-trouble.jpg

that looks like a still from Kids in the Hall!

http://www.ericdsnider.com/images/doubletrouble01.jpg

http://team4orce.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2012/07/Bash-Brothers.jpeg

To do the buddy movie right, you got to have the other part with the big pasty irish looking dude to even it out.

And you get Rickey Henderson to play Rickey Henderson...

I thought the other guy would be Ozzie Canseco

oddly enough they were able to crush batting practice pitching with those photo props.

canseco's got a real tommy wiseau thing going up there ("oh hi mark!")

http://deadspin.com/jose-cansecos-interstellar-trade-idea-will-probably-sav-1658468406

Jose Canseco @JoseCanseco
Galactic Beings have used comets as star taxis for eons
1:39 PM - 13 Nov 2014

Jose Canseco @JoseCanseco
Comet Transport is the key to our survival.
1:38 PM - 13 Nov 2014

never. ever. ever. change.

ya - this is quite sweet after Schilling yesterday.

you didn't even include the part that made me laugh really hard

Jose Canseco✔ @JoseCanseco
If Earth can control the comet transport system we will run the Milkyway. Think about that

Jose Canseco✔ @JoseCanseco
hug for u NASA #cansecomet

i fuckin hate my last dn, but i think jose jsut gave me a new one

who wants to be my bash bro and change theirs to "hug for u NASA #cansecomet"

so the "smelly" finger he shot fell off while he was playing poker!

best comment: "at least you didn't lose the hand"

p sure jose canseco is the star-child

When Jose Canseco says all-in he means it

snitches get stitches lose fingers

cansecomet!!

http://www.sbnation.com/lookit/2015/1/2/7480343/jose-canseco-predictions-2015-cansecodamus

Jose Canseco ✔ @JoseCanseco
Follow
2. @JebYork chokes on silver spoon, Lott new owner, hires Jimbo, 49ers win super bowl.

Problem: "Jeb" York isn't the CEO of the 49ers. That would be Jed York. This is impressive because "Jeb York" is a mock Twitter account created solely after Canseco insisted the 49ers' CEO was named Jeb.

priceless

remember the UFO/balloon guy? the one who faked his kid flying off in a homemade hot air balloon/ufo thingy...
Canseco and him are basically the same person now.

Jose Canseco @JoseCanseco · 15m 15 minutes ago
Your caught on video return my stereo equipment that you ripped out of my suv yesterday or else.yes this is a threat

Jose Canseco @JoseCanseco · 13m 13 minutes ago
You have 24 hours plus leave 1k for the damage done to my suv..or else this is you only warning

Jose Canseco @JoseCanseco · 13m 13 minutes ago
I will come get you my self

icymi

http://stompersbaseball.com/stompers-present-jose-canseco-weekend-june-12-13/

can g4wker send J0rdan on assignment for this?

said Stompers VP and general manager Theo Fightmaster

this is gonna make great effectively wild material

did B&S jointly cook this up i wonder

josejosejosejose

http://gfycat.com/NervousAdmiredCarp

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/CKcl0McUwAEk3Bb.jpg

could that be the true manifestation of evil guide dog from that bizarro (and fascinating) thread you made ages ago that was recently bumped

i don't know, looks more like crazy eye dog to me

imagine waking up from a nap with that dog staring at you!

or even the canine.

a linear combination of those faces made michael shannon

@JoseCanseco 2h2 hours ago
Congrats to Junior the 3rd teammate off my Springfield Nuclear Power Plant team to make the Baseball Hall of Fame! hug for Mike Piazza too

@JoseCanseco 59m59 minutes ago
If I were a vampire I could play independent baseball for ever

there is little better than jose canseco using the subjunctive

I'd forgotten that Wade Boggs was in the HOF!

you forgot he had 3010 hits?

Yes.

200 hits a season for like a million seasons in a row

wade boggs was probably had the best first 10 years of any third baseman in history

maybe schmitty or mathews gives him a run there but yeah, he's a deserving HOFer

he's 28th all-time by fWAR, 4th among 3B

led the majors in BA and OBP for 5 of his first 7 years, including 4 straight, dude was a machine

I had to remove this thread from my bookmarks because the title was getting the Cranberries stuck in my head ;_;

http://i.imgur.com/WgVCFpV.png

ONE OF US

i followed him based on this thread. i can't stop laughing but mainly everyone i know who likes sport finds this hilarious cos he was so famous that he was in a simpsons episode.

‏@JoseCanseco Oct 1
Democracies are such a fragile thing and seem to age and deteriorate never being as good as they once were . Never reversing march to death

deep!

In 2018 blockchain will become mainstream knowledge understood by moron level and above

— Jose Canseco (@JoseCanseco) November 22, 2017

lol

when you were having premarital sex, jose cans

Canseco Rule- once tweeted or discussed in media by Jose Canseco then the concept has become 'mainstream knowledge'.

I cannot believe David Ortiz aka Big Papi did not invite me to play in his golf tournament this weekend I'm one of the longest drivers in the world at 50 and over and one of the best golfers I could have helped him out with his charity does MLB still hold grudges against me

— Jose Canseco (@JoseCanseco) November 29, 2017

how will David Ortiz aka Big Papi respond

solid take

What is going on with all these politicians molesting women I've been molested by several women and never complained

— Jose Canseco (@JoseCanseco) December 12, 2017

Hey little buddy @realDonaldTrump I am interested in United Nations leadership .dm me for ideas and confidential 90 day plan #readynow

— Jose Canseco (@JoseCanseco) October 9, 2018

Aliens have been trying to teach us how to time travel but first we have to change our body composition which we are not willing to do we have tried with animals and it has failed

— Jose Canseco (@JoseCanseco) January 30, 2019

Cloning is illegal that's why we cannot evolve into our next stage

— Jose Canseco (@JoseCanseco) February 7, 2019

Once cloning is legal we will be able to purchase either bodies of ourselves in our Prime and once our shells get to old detach the brain and then apply to a new shell ot body..

— Jose Canseco (@JoseCanseco) February 7, 2019

In 50 years from now only the rich will be able to purchase a new body

— Jose Canseco (@JoseCanseco) February 7, 2019

New bodies will come with optional Android or robotic moving parts

— Jose Canseco (@JoseCanseco) February 7, 2019

I have figured out a way to live an extra 30 years

— Jose Canseco (@JoseCanseco) February 7, 2019

One of many ways to live an extra 30 years is that you have to sleep in almost freezing temperatures

— Jose Canseco (@JoseCanseco) February 7, 2019

Another way to live 30 years longer if you must have sex at least 3 times a week

— Jose Canseco (@JoseCanseco) February 7, 2019

people who have figured out have to live an extra 30 years

he has the exact same energy as @Love_That_Goku

i have an encyclopedic knowledge of Dragonball canon and all you ask me is "does Krillin like anal" "does android 18 have a pussy" etc

— love_that_goku (@Love_that_Goku) September 24, 2016

all signs point to Android 18 having a functional reproductive system but once again this is not my business

— love_that_goku (@Love_that_Goku) September 24, 2016

NO Piccolo does not smoke weed

— love_that_goku (@Love_that_Goku) September 24, 2016

the way some of you people speak to me is disgusting. "hey Christian does piccolo smoke weed" "does Roshi fuck the turtle". just unreal

— love_that_goku (@Love_that_Goku) September 24, 2016

everybody knows there are many ways to live 30 years longer, but here's a tricky constraint: I must have sex at least 3 times a week.

Watching World of Dance watching J.Lo text Alex Rodriguez little does she know that he is cheating on her with my ex-wife Jessica poor girl she has no idea who he really is

— Jose Canseco (@JoseCanseco) March 11, 2019

Alex Rodriguez stop being a piece of shit stop cheating on Jennifer Lopez

— Jose Canseco (@JoseCanseco) March 11, 2019

https://t.co/CXErAtc0aw...... you lied to defend that piece of shit Jessica I told you to not open up that can of worms time to polygraph and tell the truth now

— Jose Canseco (@JoseCanseco) March 13, 2019

i'm not sure what's happening, but only 26 to go

30 minutes...

— Jose Canseco (@JoseCanseco) September 6, 2021

The September collection is finally live 🎉

only 50 of each item ⚡️https://t.co/K6yOzJ3VTP pic.twitter.com/FbPaDq95T4

— Jose Canseco (@JoseCanseco) September 6, 2021

loooool

who would have guessed it was a countdown to new merch

wait!!!

that wasn’t the big news.. give me 5 minutes

— Jose Canseco (@JoseCanseco) September 6, 2021

coffee

i knew jose canseco wouldn't let me down

merry Christmas to everyone And a happy New Year Well almost everyone

— Jose Canseco (@JoseCanseco) December 25, 2022