He does appear to have perfected that mix of fence-sitting banality, ponderous syntax and inane phrases that no one ever really uses ("provided he has his shooting boots on" etc).
― Matt DC, Monday, 3 June 2013 18:37 (eleven years ago) link
Are any of his proper Observer match reports available somewhere? Would like to see how they compare.
― oppet, Monday, 3 June 2013 19:14 (eleven years ago) link
"we will have checked your card in a few seconds" - euston lloyds tsb cash machine
― r|t|c, Wednesday, 3 July 2013 19:17 (eleven years ago) link
http://languagelog.ldc.upenn.edu/nll/?p=5112
Takes a special kind of interest, admittedly.
― Tim, Monday, 8 July 2013 18:17 (eleven years ago) link
Heh, there's even a 'sports journalism' comment at 8:33, sadly missing the point that will have been noted by nult
― Ismael Klata, Monday, 8 July 2013 19:07 (eleven years ago) link
David Moyes announced that he had slept soundly the night before his first Premier League match as Manchester United manager. The weight of expectation accompanying the succession to Sir Alex Ferguson had not kept him awake.
And if Moyes had any dreams, they would have mirrored the events that unfolded at The Liberty Stadium in a manner that had business as usual stamped straight through it as United beat Swansea City 4-1.
― No results found for "churl sweatshirt" (Nilmar Honorato da Silva), Sunday, 18 August 2013 13:03 (eleven years ago) link
a fearful metaphysics - dreams mirroring events (not foretelling or reviewing), the product of which terrifying and rarified concept is resolved from its abstract and vaporous conception into a Blackpool Rock-like fabric of concrete reality. The gnostic, or mirror-dream created inner message of which is known only when consumed. It thus exists S. cat like in a paradoxical status of fatalistic indeterminacy, but is always (to the tolling of a bell):
BUSINESS AS USUAL.
Starring David Moyes as
The Ascetic Seer of BAU.
― Fizzles, Tuesday, 20 August 2013 18:09 (eleven years ago) link
i'd love to see his face writing that drivel. "ooh look at me, I'm salvador dali. check it oout!"
― cajunsunday, Tuesday, 20 August 2013 20:47 (eleven years ago) link
Yeah, peculiar. Not sure he really thinks that though, seems more like a fairly effortless expression of unpunctuated thought. The effect is great tho. Man's reach exceeding his grasp or something.
― Fizzles, Tuesday, 20 August 2013 21:06 (eleven years ago) link
Phil McNulty, BBC Sport Chief Football Writer at Goodison ParkFULL-TIME ANALYSIS - Everton 1-0 Chelsea
"Everton showed resilience as well a determination to pass the ball in the manner demanded by new manager Roberto Martinez - and this is a win of huge significance for the Spaniard.
― 2 ℜ 4 u (Nilmar Honorato da Silva), Saturday, 14 September 2013 18:33 (ten years ago) link
senile fitba hacks will be the last people saying 'spaniard' 400 years after the armada has sailed
― 2 ℜ 4 u (Nilmar Honorato da Silva), Saturday, 14 September 2013 18:35 (ten years ago) link
In the dark days of summer discontent as Wayne Rooney once again glanced towards Old Trafford's exit, David Moyes made his opening pitch as Manchester United manager.
― For bodies we are ready to build pyramids (whatever), Thursday, 19 September 2013 22:53 (ten years ago) link
Manchester City ensured David Moyes' first derby as Manchester United manager ended in abject humiliation with a crushing victory at the Etihad Stadium
not especially classic Nult but I enjoy it because I'm not sure the phrase 'abject humiliation' had ever been used before by anyone but Jafar in Aladdin.
Also Nult really sticks the fucking knife in in that report, what did Moyesy do to him?
― Waluigi Nono (Merdeyeux), Sunday, 22 September 2013 18:19 (ten years ago) link
http://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/0/football/24330700
this is fuckin deranged
― random accies memories (Sgt. Biscuits), Monday, 30 September 2013 21:00 (ten years ago) link
Nult will have methodically assembled a colossal suite of opinions on everything related to Manchester United, Sir Alex Ferguson and David Moyes over the past ten years, and today will doubtlessly have been seen to have been the optimal occasion to just absolutely fucking haemorrhage them everywhere for far longer than any sane person could withstand reading
― random accies memories (Sgt. Biscuits), Monday, 30 September 2013 21:02 (ten years ago) link
how'd they manage a table of "Utd's Midfield Flops" without mentioning Verón?
― how do i shot cwmbran? (Noodle Vague), Monday, 30 September 2013 21:03 (ten years ago) link
He surely knew a joint bid of £28m for Fellaini and England defender Leighton Baines would only antagonise his former club Everton - and made the lone signing of Fellaini for £500,000 less on deadline day appear faintly ridiculous.
...
To succeed such a significant figure as Ferguson while at the same time making key changes to a successful squad made it arguably the hardest job at elite level in world football.
This actually seems like its his life's work but half of the sentences don't even make sense
― random accies memories (Sgt. Biscuits), Monday, 30 September 2013 21:10 (ten years ago) link
These are not crisis times for Moyes but troubled times. United have shown their faith with a six-year deal and will not be panicked in any way - but Moyes will know answers must be found quickly.
9.3 triple Nult for the finish and relax/black out for three days
― random accies memories (Sgt. Biscuits), Monday, 30 September 2013 21:12 (ten years ago) link
Every new manager almost always brings his old backroom staff with him.
this is my favourite
― Ismael Klata, Monday, 30 September 2013 21:12 (ten years ago) link
Fortune wasn't a flop. Quintessential Utd squad player
― Number None, Monday, 30 September 2013 21:21 (ten years ago) link
Made the mistake of scrolling all the way down while still on the first paragraph, there's just no way. I will feel like I've wasted my bedtime reading slot if I try and wade through all that
― Third Rate Zoo Keepers With Tenth Rate Minds (Windsor Davies), Monday, 30 September 2013 21:34 (ten years ago) link
http://news.bbcimg.co.uk/media/images/70185000/jpg/_70185898_meulensteen-phelan.jpg
ill-judged "does anybody else really miss Mike Phelan" detour in the middle, I for one am gagging to see the ingracious cunt back on TV joylessly toeing the party line to the MOTD cameras
― random accies memories (Sgt. Biscuits), Monday, 30 September 2013 21:47 (ten years ago) link
he was on setanta last saturday
he has the demeanour of a 75 year old widower
― Nilmar Honorato da Silva, Monday, 30 September 2013 21:48 (ten years ago) link
biscuits you are a saint for resurrecting nultroast
― THE SONIC UNREGULATED ELECTRIC CATFISH (imago), Monday, 30 September 2013 23:25 (ten years ago) link
haha, god. that piece must be about 5,000 words.
― Evil Juice Box Man (LocalGarda), Monday, 30 September 2013 23:33 (ten years ago) link
http://i.imgur.com/F5lznYr.png
ah yes that old quote
― r|t|c, Tuesday, 1 October 2013 12:58 (ten years ago) link
But this is a manager, despite his lack of silverware and Champions League experiences, who knows his way around the Premier League.
usually you can only call yourself a manager once you win something
― r|t|c, Tuesday, 1 October 2013 13:02 (ten years ago) link
Always thought it was "Attack, attack: attack ; attack - attack. (Attack.)"
― Evil Juice Box Man (LocalGarda), Tuesday, 1 October 2013 13:03 (ten years ago) link
time was the worst that he would say about a tier 1 england regular was that he will have wanted to have done better but nult is giving joe hart a kicking in the liveblog today
between this and shitting on moyes' doorsteps it's quite a turnaround for the once quiescent scribe
― Nilmar Honorato da Silva, Thursday, 3 October 2013 00:25 (ten years ago) link
not even just in the liveblog and his columns either, he's going in hard in the normally aseptically factual match reports. nult's gone rogue.
― opie dead eyed piece of shit (Merdeyeux), Thursday, 3 October 2013 01:53 (ten years ago) link
England face Poland at Wembley on Tuesday in a World Cup qualifier with echoes from history as well as significance for the future as victory will send Roy Hodgson's side to Brazil next summer.
― Evil Juice Box Man (LocalGarda), Tuesday, 15 October 2013 09:07 (ten years ago) link
Some have criticised the FA, but it is a decision that will make for an electric atmosphere and while it will also lift Poland, England defender Leighton Baines believes it will also act as inspiration for Roy Hodgson's side.
― Evil Juice Box Man (LocalGarda), Tuesday, 15 October 2013 09:22 (ten years ago) link
it's actually a disgrace that he's paid to write.
still not convinced he isn't a reasonably sophisticated algorithm
― I like to tackle hard and am crazy (Noodle Vague), Tuesday, 15 October 2013 11:07 (ten years ago) link
those two sentences
I mean
just
― cozen, Tuesday, 15 October 2013 14:22 (ten years ago) link
he obv doesn't even read his own work, it's genuinely a wrong.
― Evil Juice Box Man (LocalGarda), Tuesday, 15 October 2013 14:26 (ten years ago) link
Phil McNulty @philmcnulty 3h
England have a corner...Joe Hart needs to be on his toes here.
― Nilmar Honorato da Silva, Tuesday, 15 October 2013 22:45 (ten years ago) link
Phil McNulty @philmcnulty 4h
Having, in a break with old traditions, correctly predicted a convincing England victory against Montenegro, I go for the same v Poland.
― Nilmar Honorato da Silva, Tuesday, 15 October 2013 22:52 (ten years ago) link
i feel that if mcnulty had a personal twitter account it'd have a great deal of grotesque appeal.
― opie dead eyed piece of shit (Merdeyeux), Tuesday, 15 October 2013 22:55 (ten years ago) link
Having, in a break with old traditions, correctly
eeuuugghhh
― Third Rate Zoo Keepers With Tenth Rate Minds (Windsor Davies), Tuesday, 15 October 2013 23:14 (ten years ago) link
Townsend came out of left field - or in a strictly football context right-field - as a resounding selection success for England manager Roy Hodgson with two outstanding performances in the World Cup qualifying wins against Montenegro and Poland that secured their place in Brazil next summer.
― random accies memories (Sgt. Biscuits), Monday, 21 October 2013 21:40 (ten years ago) link
Lampard is intensely right wing - although in footballing terms in fact plays in a more central midfield berth for both Chelsea and England
― random accies memories (Sgt. Biscuits), Monday, 21 October 2013 21:42 (ten years ago) link
he didn't did he
― HAVE YOU SEEN ME? Please don't hesitate (imago), Monday, 21 October 2013 21:42 (ten years ago) link
oh wait it's you
― HAVE YOU SEEN ME? Please don't hesitate (imago), Monday, 21 October 2013 21:43 (ten years ago) link
fucken
Chicharito - which means "little pea" - came from nowhere, although in the more traditionally visuospatial context in which many fans and observers will likely have viewed the match was actually standing on the edge of the Aston Villa six yard area as he rose to head home th
― random accies memories (Sgt. Biscuits), Monday, 21 October 2013 21:45 (ten years ago) link
Phil McNulty @philmcnulty 15hFew Man City fans suddenly reliving a great moment. Getting retweets of my tweet of Aguero's title-winning goal. Brain was scrambled. Again.
― Legitimate space tale (LocalGarda), Tuesday, 22 October 2013 09:58 (ten years ago) link
finally the mask slips
that gum you like will have come back in style
― r|t|c, Tuesday, 22 October 2013 10:32 (ten years ago) link
Seasoned social media users imprison me with RTs. Knowing help will have been sent I wait.
― Legitimate space tale (LocalGarda), Tuesday, 22 October 2013 10:42 (ten years ago) link