Shit Noddy teams on Quest: EFL and beyond 21/22

Because still using the thread from two seasons ago displays a lack of respect to teams below the top flight

https://ichef.bbci.co.uk/onesport/cps/976/cpsprodpb/AC79/production/_119935144_shutterstock_editorial_12257234bk.jpg

he's not ready

well someone's missing the EFL

something something joey barton dot jpg

Perversely pleased to have had a euphoric draw followed by an unbelievably frustrating draw in the first two fan-attended games at the new plough lane.

Gillingham we’re fucking shit and had nothing of note about them beyond Steve Evans’ panto act on the touchline.

Ayoub Assal is the best player in the league btw and I’m excited to watch him all this season cos he definitely won’t be hanging about after that.

*were

it is still quite fucking hilarious that Evans' meteoric rise up the leagues led him to Leeds Utd at one point

you know who's begun the season really, really badly

well of course you do

we're cursed

and muggins here made an impulsive dash to fucking stadium mk which he is only now arriving home from

at least some of the other fancied sides have started slowly eh

Not tres Bonne #itfc pic.twitter.com/K2N9hxQ5NL

— Ben Chaplin (@Sir_Chappers) August 17, 2021

O'Brien played last night but this was clearly a move to force Leeds hand to stump up the cash and stop fucking about. He wasn't really there, not that he shit out of tackles but when his usual extraordinary energy level drops by a few percent he looks quite an ordinary player. He'll probably get found out fast in the prem I say with no bitterness. We just need two Sorba Thomas's now so he can get on the end of his own exquisite set-piece deliveries and average 2-3 goals a game.

Barnet: A week in the life

https://barnetfc.com/a-message-from-our-chairman

I used to go to the Bees a bit in the underhill days, so I've watched their decline to the neglected works team of a Stanmore leisure centre with morbid interest. To pick up Kleanthous on just one point among many, the 'Heineken strike' (actually a strike affecting the delivery contractors) was only due to start today, and was in any case called off on friday, so was obviously not the reason the club was scrambling around to source cans of Fosters for the opening game of the season lol.

that is a wonderful read ty

Most chances created in the Championship:

Sorba Thomas - 17
Ryan Giles - 15
John Swift - 12
Callum O’Hare - 11
Jeremie Bela - 11
Scott Malone - 11
Fabio Carvalho - 10

sigh if we had a striker who wasn't an injured Rhodes-to-nowhere or a 34 year old Frasier Campbell we'd be on fire. I think all our CBs are joint top-scorers now.

I think all our CBs are joint top-scorers now.

Same for Cardiff I believe, in fact I think Flint is top scorer in the league?

yeah he is! Although I think Mitrovic will probably get more by the end of season it's an impressive tally by this stage.

Just caught up on this week's Cup fixtures and you were pretty unlucky against Everton.

yeah very unlucky in having a goal ruled out and Sinani missing a sitter and then Lees getting subbed for Turton was not a good idea, he looks out of his depth against championship sides never mind Everton. The defence has become more settled with the so far very impressive Nicholls in goal. Most people had very low expectations for a keeper who was let go by the MK Dongs and so did I tbh!

if you don't put Naby up front at some point this season you're cowards

You must have enjoyed Vieira picking a strong line up to try and get some confidence going then getting gubbed anyway.

I didn't even notice! Too busy refreshing Charlton Life repeatedly to see if we've signed a left-back yet (we haven't, but we HAVE secured one of Rob Lee's sons on a season loan)

My interest in the Carabao is comparable to my club's tbh, and it was good of crisp to not come a-gloating after round 1, realising just how meaningless his boys' 1-0 at ours truly was

The fact that its such a shit noddy competition makes it even more annoying we haven't won it tbh

lol good old Noddy Sarr, man. He'll probably still easily score more than Rhodes with the kind of deliveries Sorbz puts in the box. He can do an absolute howler and then follow it up with a goal and a heroic perfectly timed game saving tackle in the space of 2 mins. But saying that if he didn't frequently make these mistakes he'd be at Barca!

my new hero Sorba Thomas ripping up teams every game. A goalkeeper where you don't have to look away every time the ball goes into the box. This is actually becoming entertaining to watch for the first time since 2017.

⚽️
🅰️🅰️@SorbaThomas was at the centre of everything good @htafc did today#EFLonQuest - Saturdays at 9pm #EFL#htafc @takesthatchance @TheTerriersChat

Stream free on demand with @discoveryplusUK: https://t.co/5BVoLl5xim pic.twitter.com/2YlYiuiQvq

— Quest (@QuestTV) August 28, 2021

Sorba Thomas!!!

on Quest

some very dodgy business going down at Reading. They are under a transfer embargo and Chelsea have loaned them Drinkwater and Rahman whose wages put together would almost equal their entire wage bill from last season. Apparently there are some links with the owners as well.

Saido Berahino has joined Wednesday on a permanent deal. I'm sure he used to be good!

now Andy Carroll in talks with Reading. Siri, explain to me in very simple language what a transfer embargo is.

buzzing that we've got Mipo Odubeko on loan after watching some vids - that old classic. Apparently we bid £2m and were told not a chance. Some West Ham fans don't seem happy he has been farmed out as their only outright 9 is Antonio. He's only 18 but so is Colwill and he's improved our defence immeasurably and scored a last minute winner.

getting £11m waste of space Mbenza off the wage-bill and O'Brien into new contract negging and despite not spending any transfer fees, it's been the best transfer window in years.

Brilliant, Darlo win their game in hand and we go bottom.

yeah it's been a terrible start

looking at the embryonic championship table I reckon those tricky trees are going to get a shellacking on saturday.

Chris Hughton gone, damnit I cursed it.

We finally sign a centre half. He lasts 20 minutes before limping off, having fucked up to give them the opener.

How the fuck have we beaten York?

Sorba Thomas stats this season (Championship Rank):

Assists | 6 (1st)
Big Chances Created | 7 (1st)
Chances Created | 33 (1st)
Accurate Crosses | 30 (1st)

just been confirmed he's in the Wales Squad to face the Czech Republic. From playing for Boreham Wood to being the backup for Gareth Bale in the space of 9 months.

Long enough attention span for a Stephen Bissette blu-ray extra (aldo) at 9:40 28 Sep 21
How the fuck have we beaten York?

We beat York at their place last season too, when they were top of the league.

A missed penalty and then a miskick by their keeper seems to have been enough to sink them. Sounds like it was quite an open game, but only a couple of clear-cut chances each.

happy for Sorba to get his first full Welsh cap. But playing him as a fullback and not letting him near the set-pieces and especially when Wilson/James were wasting them all is a criminal waste of his talent.

The South Wales Derby is slowly turning into a BTEC Old Firm Derby.

“London is our Capital. No Surrender”, says yer Da. pic.twitter.com/8fzlpRAQxu

— Propaganda Wales🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿⚽️ (@PropagandaWales) October 17, 2021

jesus wept.

What's weird is all the defensive Cardiff replies, like, 'no it's not, that's only one of the teams support doing that' - what do they think happens at an Old Firm game?

I see the 95th minute enjoyer has once again deigned to comment on the pain and suffering of the lower orders

yes I'm okay yes of course I'm okay we're gonna smash Stanley later oh yes

it seems Adkins is at that stage where (to probably misquote Gianni Paladini in Four Year Plan) "When managers start losing games all the time, they lose their fucking minds.."

We have drawn four consecutive games 2-2.

I hate seeing Forest Green (aka the Coldplay of L2) at the top, the chairman is such a smug prick.

What's weird is all the defensive Cardiff replies, like, 'no it's not, that's only one of the teams support doing that' - what do they think happens at an Old Firm game?

Tricolors, Palestinian flags, Ooh ah up the 'RA, Fuck the Queen etc. (One of those is banned now tho tbf)

A trip to Stroud would be class though tbf (provided we stay up ffs lol)

Much as my own trip to Lincoln last weekend was class - what a brilliant place, performance/result notwithstanding

congrats tim, good to see

Thanks chums!

I am taking NV's DN personally though.

for some reason whilst checking the tables a few weeks back I thought you'd blown auto, but it's very open league 2 this season.

We were down as low as 8th in the table in Feb, but with games in hand that we mostly converted.

I think the only teams in the top 4 divisions who've lost fewer games than we have are Man City, Liverpool and Chelsea.

I nearly choked on my coffee with that bit of Hudds Town erasure there!

we've only lost 2 since November

Oh I see - sorry. I meant all season. We've only lost 7 which is obviously unheard of for us.

a double figure positive goal difference is our rare achievement this season. But no keeper in the champo has kept more clean sheets than Nicholls, we'll be lucky to keep hold of him.

We've had Cameron Dawson on loan from Wednesday all season and he's been an unbelievable keeper at L2 level, I imagine they'll want him back or someone who can actually pay his champ level wages (ie not us) will grab him.

call the cops Luton are being murdered

oh dear they gave Nathan Jones the manager of the year award before the season was over. Some of our lot were moaning that Corberan should have won it. I'm superstitious enough to think manager awards are a curse. They'll probably get a result against Reading, but if they don't Middlesbrough could fuck their playoff plans on Saturday.

Bournemouth vs Forest tomorrow is a big one. I hate them both but want Forest to lose because their fans are almost more full of shit than the Leeds rabble and we can actually beat them and seemingly can't even compete against t'other lot.

Rob Edwards (Forest Green) got manager of the year in L2, but their collapse has been incredible to watch. Someone said they were 28 points clear of them at the start of Feb, and we overtook them this weekend.

I’d say it would be just like Exeter to throw it away now it’s in our hands but “it” has so rarely been anywhere near our bloody hands that no-one would know what we’re like in this position. Which is to say I still expect us to find a way to lose out on the L2 championship but we’re playing Vale who are experiencing their own little collapse so you never know.

sincerely hope you succeed in pissing on their bonfire, Dale Vince seems like a right twat.

There's always something to hate about all clubs, ECFC included. As far as rich dudes plaything clubs go, FGR seem pleasingly weird to me. I wish he'd decided to do this with a club in a place where people didn't have to drive to get there, and a place where a club might have a socially and economically (as well as environmentally) sustainable future. Like, I wish he'd taken on Gloucester City*, who weren't far from the league some years back, decent sized place and way better connected by public transport Hard to see FGR getting anywhere without a constant stream funding, feels like Rushden & Diamonds but made out of wood not leather.

FGR have been taking a modicum of heat about flying a Palestinian flag at their games, I note.

*I have literally no knowledge of what's going on or has gone on at Gloucester City, it's just Gloucester's nearby and might sustain a club once Vince has moved on.

I didn't know about the Palestinian flag. lol was assuming he is a smug eco-fash wealth creator who travels the world on the wooden solar powered sloop his minimum wage workforce made for him. And I still could be right! but kudos indeed for the flag.

Ecotricity have been my energy supplier for ten years and they're notably user-friendly, haven't had any bullshit off them. Plus, I liked Stroud just before everyone realised it was great and moved there

Our game there had better not be a fuckin midweek

(Actually if it is I'm taking the whole Tuesday off)

I always feel like Gretna in Scotland are the model for the Vince/post Vince world.

Gloucester are in our league (NLN), went shit or bust with the budget to go for promotion last year only for it to get announced nobody was going up, were relegation candidates up until February this season.

Stroud is batshit crazy, was the centre of UK LSD production for years and is now so vehemently anti-vaxx I managed to get my booster by booking the day before when there was a 2 week waiting list everywhere else.

yeah Gretna were quite contentious and hated by some Scottish football fans. I learnt this from ILX after years of wrongly thinking they might have had some broad novelty appeal ... what with the freescoring doctor and that.

EFL playoff final wins

Huddersfield 4/5
Forest 0/0
Luton 0/0
Millwall 2/4
Sheff Utd 0/4
Boro 1/2

...intimidating

That's some result for the Gas today.

Poor old Cobblers, eh?

I am mildly disappointed about missing out on the L2 title on goal difference, really only because Saturday night in Exeter would have been a proper laugh if we'd done it. Promotion was always the main thing. Saying that, there's a photo going around of an EFL branded arch saying CHAMPIONS sitting unused behind one of our stands, I confess to finding that a bit upsetting.

Seeing Argyle crash out of the L1 playoff placess to Franchise, 0-5 at home, only to see Franchise limply surrender to dirty old Wycombe in the playoff semi, is a small footballing joy.

it was a great feeling when we dumped Franchise out the L1 playoffs semis, despite losing the home leg 2-1. It was even sweeter that they had dirty cheating ex-L66ds barsteward Alan Smith being the pantomime bell end in both games.

just saw a clip of Nathan Jones suggesting Town paid big money for free-transfer players and even mentioning Hogg, who we got for pennies nearly a decade ago because he hated living in the south. Lol, Town even missed out on Luton's top striker, Elijah Adebayo because our chairman baulked at the price and they outbid us. If I was a Luton manager playing dubious underdog mind games I'd mention what a shithole Kenilworth Road is. They are only the underdogs in the sense that Corberan is a much smarter and more likable manager on a learning trajectory that will take him to a top job at some point. Regardless of Monday's result.

here we fucking go!

Geddon!

just getting ready to inject that Nathan Jones post-match interview straight into a vein

feels like huddersfield and forest deserve to compete in the final

their long winning run after losing 5-6 games on the bounce with Hughton started at our place, but then we had a classic 1-0 against the run of play smash and grab at their place and then got beaten by them in the cup. I fucking hate them tbh and am not confident we could beat them again this season. I hope the Blades have an against the odds turnaround against them tomorrow.

Rhodes volleying it in on the stretch like that, lad's still fucking got it, lol!

Rhodes must fall imo

I am so so sorry to seem cruel but anyone else think this dog looks like Steve Cooper? pic.twitter.com/bqqJKWUmNf

— Ashley Thomas (@Ashleyjackarmy) May 18, 2022

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/FTSQKUbXoAA5h8X?format=jpg&name=medium

he's ready (for our big game against Sunderland next season)

Commiserations Calz. Guessing Forest will be pretty fucked next season.

we got done by a BALD ref doing his last big gig, the replay and VAR showed there was contact on Tofollo but BALD overruled, and that was just one of the shit decisions that went against Town. But I'm not really that arsed tbh. The last time was only fun for about 6 games and it took us nearly two seasons to get rid of all the overpaid garbage players, fuck the prem tbh.

Don't let your internalised baldhate blind you! But aye, dreadful ref. Retiring to run a record shop called 'Vinyl Whistle' which, jesus.

hah hah what a cnut!

the only two playoff finals (I think out of 6 now) I have not gone to with my step-dad and my brother in the last 30 years are the only ones Town have lost. I only turn up for the wins!

I have a 100% record in playoff finals, 4 wins in 4 different stadiums (wasn't at the steve claridge shin game)

Comiz though, even tho i was leaning towards forest for their fa cup exploits

they have already blown most of their transfer budget for next season when they signed up Jon Moss

what have I just read?

https://stainestownfootballclub.co.uk/club-statement-june-2022/

what was it? the account is now suspended

Some choice cuts here

Maddest statement ever. Worth a read, even if it's just the screenshots https://t.co/GFq2EwkUWt pic.twitter.com/rvazjFMSbb

— money wasting expert (@CruelBritannia) June 18, 2022

lol wtf

could with a Paul Mason style dynamic chart on LLP

Our third today was a bit special.

Missed today's game at Boston? 😭 Catch all the goals in our 4-2 win at the Jakemans Community Stadium 🥇#COYW | #BOSvHFC

— HerefordFC (@HerefordFC) October 8, 2022