Taxes!

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Overheard today at a health fair: Should you be checking blood pressure on tax day?! Haha!

Overheard five minutes later at a different booth: Do you think I should get my blood pressure checked on tax day?! Haha!

Ahh, corporate humor!

Taxes fucking sucked it this year. Bad witholding = I owes .. uh ... LOT. But for the first time ever, I don't owe the city anything.

― dave225 (Dave225), Friday, 15 April 2005 15:31 (nineteen years ago) link

jesus you have to FILE your city taxes? thank god I don't have to do that. however, my city is completely broke so they'll probably start that soon.

― kyle (akmonday), Friday, 15 April 2005 15:52 (nineteen years ago) link

I only have to file if my employer fucks up and doesn't pay them. Oh, looks like employer didn't withhold the right amount again ...

― dave225 (Dave225), Friday, 15 April 2005 16:03 (nineteen years ago) link

You don't have to file city taxes separately, Kyle -- it's just a little sub-section of the state filing. ("If you are a resident of NYC, see table X, etc...")

I'm annoyed at the paltry tuition deductions they allow, too; a $4000/year cap doesn't come anywhere close to reflecting the cost of higher education; it'd barely cover tuition and fees at a community college! (And lord, if there's anything people should be able to spend money on tax-free, it's education that will theoretically lead to their paying a hell of a lot more taxes in the future.)

― nabisco (nabisco), Friday, 15 April 2005 17:32 (nineteen years ago) link

not to mention that the student loan interest credit gets gradually phased out if you are single and earn b/w $50K and $65K, and if you earn more than $65K then you can't take that credit!

― Eisbär (llamasfur), Friday, 15 April 2005 18:04 (nineteen years ago) link

three weeks pass...

HRCOCK: thanks for e-filing my stuff incorrectly, getting my taxes rejected, and never bothering to contact me about it! also thanks for not letting me know that the agent I had quit the day after filing them, so all my shit got lost, and now my taxes haven't been filed, I'll probably owe more IRS fees, and also thanks for giving me the impression that you aren't going to pay those for me even though this is all your fault. I hate you HRCOCK!

― kyle (akmonday), Monday, 9 May 2005 21:19 (nineteen years ago) link

hey assuming everything goes okay and I have my kid in december, I get to claim it as a deduction for the whole year, right? right?

― teeny (teeny), Monday, 9 May 2005 21:22 (nineteen years ago) link

There ya go, the kid's name should be Writeoff. (Sorry to hear about that, Kyle, what a mess. :-( )

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Monday, 9 May 2005 21:24 (nineteen years ago) link

Dear IRS,

Thanks for the $5 check I recieved int he mail today. Thanks for spending my tax money and everyone else's on the bookkeeping/paperwork neccesary to send out $5 checks. Really.

xoxo,
mouse

― mouse (mouse), Tuesday, 10 May 2005 00:29 (nineteen years ago) link

Oddly enough, I sent THEM a $5 check. So consider that a gift from me to you.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Tuesday, 10 May 2005 00:30 (nineteen years ago) link

hrmph

― mouse (mouse), Tuesday, 10 May 2005 00:33 (nineteen years ago) link

eight months pass...

i actually OWE taxes this year, wtf. first time for me, i'm totally p.o.'ed. i need to go kick something!

― ai lien (kold_krush), Friday, 27 January 2006 17:27 (eighteen years ago) link

I need to sort mine out this weekend. Last year I was owed money by the govt and I gave it to charity. If I owe anything this year I'm damn well taking it back.

― Markelby (Mark C), Friday, 27 January 2006 17:46 (eighteen years ago) link

Are you using an accountant, ai lien? I somehow ended up owing over a grand because I just cashed that $300 check Shrubya threw at us during 9/11. Apparently, that was supposed to be reported on the return, and I got hit hard.

Anyway, I carry all of my delicate financial information to a woman who has an office off of MacArthur down by Starlite, next door to a liquor store. She's got me hundreds of dollars back from the IRS and the state, and she charges me like a hundred bucks to do it.

― Pleasant Plains /// (Pleasant Plains ///), Friday, 27 January 2006 18:22 (eighteen years ago) link

Doers she give you dog biscuits?

― Serge Protecteur (nordicskilla), Friday, 27 January 2006 18:36 (eighteen years ago) link

Just mints.

― Pleasant Plains /// (Pleasant Plains ///), Friday, 27 January 2006 18:43 (eighteen years ago) link

I need to deduct gas mileage and cell phone usage.

Are job-hunting expenses also allowed to deducted?

― kingfish kuribo's shoe (kingfish 2.0), Friday, 27 January 2006 19:36 (eighteen years ago) link

Yes.

― TOMBOT, Friday, 27 January 2006 19:41 (eighteen years ago) link

hooray!

― kingfish kuribo's shoe (kingfish 2.0), Friday, 27 January 2006 19:51 (eighteen years ago) link

p.p. i had the h&r b1ock do it for me after i did them myself. see, i thought i was doing it wrong wrong wrong since my math said that i OWED. then i had them do it and it turns out that i still owe. but $1 less than i figured. i haven't been this fuxxing cussy in awhile. insert current administration anger rant right here.

― ai lien (kold_krush), Friday, 27 January 2006 22:34 (eighteen years ago) link

there is no way you had to owe $1000 on $300.

― kyle (akmonday), Friday, 27 January 2006 22:39 (eighteen years ago) link

It was very complicated, kyle. Let me do my own taxes again, and I could find a way to owe a million.

― Pleasant Plains /// (Pleasant Plains ///), Friday, 27 January 2006 22:51 (eighteen years ago) link

one year passes...

Who brought their 1040 to work today, just in case ILX gets dull?

― Dr Morbius, Thursday, 12 April 2007 16:52 (seventeen years ago) link

haha HERE!

― kenan, Thursday, 12 April 2007 16:53 (seventeen years ago) link

I knew there was something I liked about you!

― Dr Morbius, Thursday, 12 April 2007 16:55 (seventeen years ago) link

Has anyone tried to deduct their phone bill yet? Apparently, there's a one-time deduction of fifty bucks this year because the IRS was taking taxes based on an outdated law from the Spanish-American War or something. I wish I had more information, but I heard about it too late anyway.

― Pleasant Plains, Thursday, 12 April 2007 17:37 (seventeen years ago) link

turbo tax asked automatically. I think it was $30 for me.

― Ms Misery, Thursday, 12 April 2007 17:40 (seventeen years ago) link

It is a $30 deduction, yes.

― the schef (adam schefter ha ha), Thursday, 12 April 2007 17:41 (seventeen years ago) link

it is based on whether or not you had a long-distance service provider during the past x years (i forget the exact time frame)

― the schef (adam schefter ha ha), Thursday, 12 April 2007 17:42 (seventeen years ago) link

Who brought their 1040 to work today, just in case ILX gets dull?

guilty

― sleep, Thursday, 12 April 2007 17:42 (seventeen years ago) link

Did mine during lunch.

― Ms Misery, Thursday, 12 April 2007 17:45 (seventeen years ago) link

Did mine on Sunday. Was puzzled at the long distance hash but anyway.

― Ned Raggett, Thursday, 12 April 2007 17:46 (seventeen years ago) link

I happily dropped my check in the mail last weekend.

― Rock Hardy, Thursday, 12 April 2007 17:59 (seventeen years ago) link

Do some of you still use paper forms? why?

― Ms Misery, Thursday, 12 April 2007 18:01 (seventeen years ago) link

I'm not paying them until the very last minute. Thank you Washington DC for having some bizarro holiday on 4/16.

― Jaq, Thursday, 12 April 2007 18:02 (seventeen years ago) link

federal deadline is extended until 4/17 anyway.

― Ms Misery, Thursday, 12 April 2007 18:05 (seventeen years ago) link

which is perhaps what you meant. duh.

― Ms Misery, Thursday, 12 April 2007 18:05 (seventeen years ago) link

I got my Maryland refund check yesterday. 45 bucks!

― Brent, Thursday, 12 April 2007 18:05 (seventeen years ago) link

Do some of you still use paper forms? why?

The romance.

― Ned Raggett, Thursday, 12 April 2007 18:06 (seventeen years ago) link

I filed electronically about a month ago, actually. The check I sent was the remainder I needed to send of my 1st Quarter estimated tax after my refund was applied.

― Rock Hardy, Thursday, 12 April 2007 18:07 (seventeen years ago) link

Thank you Washington DC for having some bizarro holiday on 4/16.

hey that's my birthday okay? fuck you!

― TOMBOT, Thursday, 12 April 2007 18:09 (seventeen years ago) link

(not really fuck you just ha ha)

― TOMBOT, Thursday, 12 April 2007 18:09 (seventeen years ago) link

Hey, thanks for that then Tombot and have a happy bizarro DC holiday birthday:)

I use the paper forms when I have to pay. They only have to be postmarked on the due date, and then the check can take its sweet time through the mail system.

― Jaq, Thursday, 12 April 2007 18:13 (seventeen years ago) link

paying would suck. . .I've only ever had to pay when I lived in NY and had to pay state taxes (none in TX). But then I never get these fuck-off huge refunds either so it all balances out.

― Ms Misery, Thursday, 12 April 2007 18:15 (seventeen years ago) link

I did too much independent consulting last year and couldn't knock it out with enough biz expense, so had to pay. Also, no more dependents.

Actually, I'd rather pay a bit than let the government use my $ for free all year long when I could be using it myself.

― Jaq, Thursday, 12 April 2007 18:18 (seventeen years ago) link

I'm getting more back this year than ever! I'm guessing the interest I pay on student loans and a Home Equity loan are the reason (?)

also, TN having no state income tax, I love you. But I suspect I more than make up for that with my soul-crushingly high property taxes,

― will, Thursday, 12 April 2007 18:22 (seventeen years ago) link

We make up for it with our soul-crushingly awful public schools.

― Ms Misery, Thursday, 12 April 2007 18:24 (seventeen years ago) link

Washington State makes up for it with consumer-numbing sales tax and shockingly high car tags (in certain counties).

― Jaq, Thursday, 12 April 2007 18:27 (seventeen years ago) link

OK, inbox empty, I'm gonna start ...

― Dr Morbius, Thursday, 12 April 2007 18:40 (seventeen years ago) link

So, Line 8a ... I got #31 interest on my (non_roth) IRA statement. No Form 1099, just a bank statement. Not taxable?

― Dr Morbius, Thursday, 12 April 2007 18:55 (seventeen years ago) link

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