but i still find them very funny
to be honest i cant really think of many sources of comedy which dont use tired old formulas, or rather come up with totally new and hilarious joke formats every time....
― ambrose, Wednesday, 26 September 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)
― Mark, Wednesday, 26 September 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)
― Ally, Wednesday, 26 September 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)
― suzy, Friday, 28 September 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)
― gabbneb (gabbneb), Monday, 9 October 2006 19:46 (nineteen years ago)
http://www.theonion.com/content/files/images/onion_news1802.jpg
― Andrew Farrell (afarrell), Tuesday, 10 October 2006 16:11 (nineteen years ago)
― Andrew Farrell (afarrell), Tuesday, 10 October 2006 16:12 (nineteen years ago)
― Laurel (Laurel), Tuesday, 10 October 2006 16:22 (nineteen years ago)
― Andrew Farrell (afarrell), Tuesday, 10 October 2006 18:11 (nineteen years ago)
roffle
― Young Fresh Danny D (Dan Perry), Tuesday, 10 October 2006 18:29 (nineteen years ago)
― Curt1s St3ph3ns, Wednesday, 11 October 2006 02:30 (nineteen years ago)
― chaki (chaki), Wednesday, 11 October 2006 03:30 (nineteen years ago)
― gypsy mothra (gypsy mothra), Wednesday, 11 October 2006 03:42 (nineteen years ago)
― Andrew (enneff), Wednesday, 11 October 2006 03:44 (nineteen years ago)
In the same edition, the TV guide spoof made me totally lose my shit (in the slightly unhinged mood of the time, obv)
http://www.theonion.com/content/node/38450
Especially CBS: "Dan Rather's 83rd Straight Hour On The Air / Dan Rather Seriously Loses His Shit / Medicating Dan Rather"
― Trayce (trayce), Wednesday, 11 October 2006 04:06 (nineteen years ago)
http://www.theonion.com/content/news_briefs/95_96_prayers_finally
I was laughing at this until the very end. That last joke seems unusually mean-spirited for the Onion.
― Nathan, Thursday, 18 October 2007 21:42 (eighteen years ago)
um, the christopher reeve snipe was hardly cricket.
― darraghmac, Thursday, 18 October 2007 21:44 (eighteen years ago)
True. I guess that somehow escaped me when I first read it.
― Nathan, Thursday, 18 October 2007 21:45 (eighteen years ago)
i liked this one because is not jello a foods
[a hrarf = this is my internets link] http://www.theonion.com/content/news/conceptual_terrorists_encase_sears[/a hraf linkthing]
― a puppy, Thursday, 18 October 2007 21:48 (eighteen years ago)
I have to say, for having webbed toes you are impressively skilled at typing.
― Abbott, Thursday, 18 October 2007 21:53 (eighteen years ago)
a hrarf!
― G00blar, Thursday, 18 October 2007 21:55 (eighteen years ago)
I don't get why everybody's blaming the puppy for not being Socialist Realism or somethink.
― Noodle Vague, Thursday, 18 October 2007 21:56 (eighteen years ago)
I don't even know what that means and I am a hu-man.
― Abbott, Thursday, 18 October 2007 21:59 (eighteen years ago)
who blames a puppy i am lerning better, promise the psyientests are teaching me
― a puppy, Thursday, 18 October 2007 22:01 (eighteen years ago)
I didn't express myself very clearly.
Anyway, if y'all thought the "95-96 Prayers Backlog" was cold, look what I stumbled across:
http://www.theonion.com/content/node/29919
― Noodle Vague, Thursday, 18 October 2007 22:01 (eighteen years ago)
okay that is awesome
― HI DERE, Thursday, 18 October 2007 22:02 (eighteen years ago)
the onion's had a hardon for superman for awhile - http://www.theonion.com/content/node/30382
― balls, Thursday, 18 October 2007 22:14 (eighteen years ago)
whose balls are you, i am lookinf for mine
― a puppy, Thursday, 18 October 2007 22:18 (eighteen years ago)
http://fanaticking.com/photos/Michael_Vick_Dog.jpg
― balls, Thursday, 18 October 2007 22:22 (eighteen years ago)
i kinda forgot abt the onion but this was posted on the quantum mechanic thread and it is funnee http://www.theonion.com/content/news/scientists_ask_congress_to_fund_50
― rrrobyn, Friday, 19 October 2007 03:02 (eighteen years ago)
They've really been on a roll with the cartoons - they're probably my favorite thing in the Onion now.
― Hurting 2, Friday, 2 November 2007 03:24 (eighteen years ago)
http://www.theonion.com/content/files/images/Cartoon-Cage-Free-Eggs.jpg
― Hurting 2, Friday, 2 November 2007 03:25 (eighteen years ago)
One of my more flattering caricatures.
― Ned Raggett, Friday, 2 November 2007 03:26 (eighteen years ago)
Ha.
I also really love that every so often there will be an editorial cartoon about the cartoonist's ex-wife.
― Hurting 2, Friday, 2 November 2007 03:29 (eighteen years ago)
lol http://www.theonion.com/content/files/images/Cartoon-Freak-Dancing.jpg
― Curt1s Stephens, Friday, 2 November 2007 04:02 (eighteen years ago)
I read the last word wrong and thought this was gonna be about http://content.answers.com/main/content/wp/en/thumb/3/37/250px-Vina.jpg
― James Redd and the Blecchs, Friday, 2 November 2007 04:55 (eighteen years ago)
http://www.theonion.com/content/files/images/Teens-Turning-Backs.jpg
― Frogman Henry, Friday, 2 November 2007 09:02 (eighteen years ago)
http://content.answers.com/main/content/wp/en/thumb/3/37/250px-Vina.jpg who's that on the right? Jabba the Hutt?
― Heave Ho, Friday, 2 November 2007 10:41 (eighteen years ago)
http://www.theonion.com/content/news/mel_brooks_starts_nonprofit
― El Tomboto, Friday, 2 November 2007 16:32 (eighteen years ago)
http://www.theonion.com/content/files/images/KellyKlassicMujahideen.article.jpg
― Billy Dods, Wednesday, 16 January 2008 16:29 (eighteen years ago)
o shi i hadn't seen these cartoons before -- awesome.
― That one guy that hit it and quit it, Wednesday, 16 January 2008 16:36 (eighteen years ago)
"After my baby didn't babble or gesture after 12 months, I hoped the cause was autism. I've since learned he's dead."
― That mong guy that's shit, Wednesday, 16 January 2008 16:47 (eighteen years ago)
Haha OMG:
First Indian-American Governor ElectedWith his swearing in as governor of Louisiana on Monday, Republican Bobby Jindal became the first Indian-American to head a U.S. state. What do you think?Dave Piedmont, Systems Analyst "His parents must be so close to being proud."
With his swearing in as governor of Louisiana on Monday, Republican Bobby Jindal became the first Indian-American to head a U.S. state. What do you think?
Dave Piedmont, Systems Analyst "His parents must be so close to being proud."
― nabisco, Thursday, 17 January 2008 01:01 (eighteen years ago)
Steven Seagal is...
― Kerm, Wednesday, 5 March 2008 22:09 (seventeen years ago)
http://www.theonion.com/content/opinion/act_now_to_take_advantage_of_my
story of my life
― and what, Wednesday, 5 March 2008 22:45 (seventeen years ago)
lol "Skeepers"
― Jordan, Wednesday, 5 March 2008 22:47 (seventeen years ago)
haha deja vu
me: http://www.theonion.com/content/opinion/act_now_to_take_advantage_of_my Sent at 4:31 PM on Wednesday Jordan: haha lol "skeepers"
― deej, Wednesday, 5 March 2008 22:50 (seventeen years ago)
http://www.theonion.com/content/files/images/act_now_oped.jpg
: /
― Bodrick III, Wednesday, 5 March 2008 22:56 (seventeen years ago)
that's totally the lowered-standards look
... anonymous sex with me that I'll begin to regret it as it's happening? oh double-edged zing
― rrrobyn, Wednesday, 5 March 2008 23:00 (seventeen years ago)
http://www.theonion.com/content/node/75350
― Dr Morbius, Friday, 7 March 2008 21:38 (seventeen years ago)
https://theonion.com/man-given-6-months-to-live-beats-odds-by-dying-in-2
― Josh in Chicago, Monday, 1 September 2025 18:08 (five months ago)
Also, I'd never seen this:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5cCLJieV9IY
― Josh in Chicago, Monday, 1 September 2025 18:09 (five months ago)
Good lord
https://bsky.app/profile/theonion.com/post/3lxs6om5lvk2a
― frogbs, Monday, 1 September 2025 18:15 (five months ago)
Kelly is killing it right now.
https://bsky.app/profile/kartoonistkelly.bsky.social/post/3ly3yclyq3k26
― Dan Worsley, Sunday, 7 September 2025 21:36 (five months ago)
frogbs’ link clicks through to https://theonion.com/causing-a-fuhrer/
― Nancy Makes Posts (sic), Sunday, 7 September 2025 21:49 (five months ago)
here’s Dan’s
https://theonion.com/wax-on-vax-off/
― Nancy Makes Posts (sic), Sunday, 7 September 2025 21:50 (five months ago)
need a kelly where rfk jr is depicted wearing jeans while working out (because he absolutely does)
a tough demand, but i have faith
― mookieproof, Monday, 8 September 2025 00:48 (five months ago)
https://theonion.com/witnesses-assumed-charlie-kirk-shooter-was-just-ordinary-gunman-on-school-campus/
― StanM, Friday, 12 September 2025 07:27 (five months ago)
oof
― kinder, Friday, 12 September 2025 18:36 (five months ago)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CzejLgUFM38
― Mr. T's Ballroom (Boring, Maryland), Saturday, 27 September 2025 01:36 (four months ago)
Wait I just found out this is actually showing in theaters, but nowhere near me. Anyone going?
― Mr. T's Ballroom (Boring, Maryland), Saturday, 27 September 2025 02:01 (four months ago)
I wish!
― sleeve, Saturday, 27 September 2025 02:03 (four months ago)
screening near me already sold out, it includes a screening of Sex House, oh well, missing the experience of a lifetime, whatever.
― JoeStork, Saturday, 27 September 2025 03:02 (four months ago)
I am so happy Sex House exists and persists.
― Josh in Chicago, Saturday, 27 September 2025 03:05 (four months ago)
The brief first run of Onion Studios was amazing: let us also not forget Lake Dredge Appraisal and Porkin’ Across America
― Mr. T's Ballroom (Boring, Maryland), Saturday, 27 September 2025 09:28 (four months ago)
It's great that they're reviving some of their old columnists, first Jean Teasdale and now the triumphant return of Roger Dudekhttps://theonion.com/the-cost-of-this-wedding-is-making-me-matri-moan-y/Hoping that Gorzo the Mighty is next
― Critique of the Goth Programme (Neil S), Monday, 6 October 2025 12:28 (four months ago)
lmao that is vintage stuff
― Tracer Hand, Monday, 6 October 2025 12:30 (four months ago)
Did anyone watch “Bad Pedophile”?
― Mr. T's Ballroom (Boring, Maryland), Monday, 6 October 2025 14:06 (four months ago)
the 48-seater cinema that showed it here sold out in minutes.
― fall of the house of urrsher (sic), Monday, 6 October 2025 15:46 (four months ago)
They put it on youtube. This is ridiculous, lol.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XjhSoGcQhWU
― Josh in Chicago, Friday, 10 October 2025 13:01 (four months ago)
I watched it. Monstrous. Often inscrutable as to what it’s intending to do. I assumed it’s meant to be profoundly unfunny and stupid, as a way to tell the viewer there is truly nothing funny here, just monstrous people getting away with it, and us allowing it.
― beige accent rug (Hunt3r), Friday, 10 October 2025 23:39 (four months ago)
I had some deep guilty laughs at the headlines on the Pedophile Island Tribune and seeing Mister Met in a collage of conspirators
― Mr. T's Ballroom (Boring, Maryland), Saturday, 11 October 2025 20:51 (four months ago)
laughed pretty hard at Epstein immediately trying to hang himself when he goes to trial
― frogbs, Saturday, 11 October 2025 21:14 (four months ago)
Thought it was pretty funny.
― sent a message through the Internet but it rejected (Camaraderie at Arms Length), Saturday, 11 October 2025 21:18 (four months ago)
https://ci3.googleusercontent.com/meips/ADKq_NYBKJTYT76wDsZ6zvgnJGMCJ93YE8UTEQDJYyH8wmyYHSHRAcP0lMDUYRBn0Z4sUUBkohq8rb6zmuq0qrMSDFWhUw4iGmQyOXd_00UWbt92j4AnknGkJUfhMwmaACtfrALhT3owsbgprDhnM2pQRMGW7kqdujwF4J0=s0-d-e1-ft#https://mcusercontent.com/58c80b904ec17bc5299e62ab0/images/2c9f8256-5a9a-38c3-6c11-32584c412fad.jpg
― Josh in Chicago, Friday, 17 October 2025 20:29 (three months ago)
whoa harsh toke
https://theonion.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/11/Soot_Prince_Andrew_NIB_G_PH.jpg
Soot-Covered Prince Andrew Begging On Street For Child To Molest
https://theonion.com/soot-covered-prince-andrew-begging-on-street-for-child-to-molest/
― Andy the Grasshopper, Wednesday, 5 November 2025 00:46 (three months ago)
enjoyed this: https://theonion.com/not-sure-how-they-deal-with-criminals-in-your-town-but-round-here-we-use-a-restorative-justice-process/
― silverfish, Wednesday, 12 November 2025 20:51 (three months ago)
god i was crying laughing at that
― budo jeru, Wednesday, 12 November 2025 21:06 (three months ago)
if u dont subscribe to the print edition, i highly recommend it. they save some of their best stuff for that.
― petey, pablo & mary (m bison), Thursday, 13 November 2025 01:09 (three months ago)
Think I’m bluffin’? Why don’t you ask the last guy who tried to argue that crime is a violation of the law and the state, rather’n a violation of people and relationships.
― lag∞n, Saturday, 15 November 2025 22:45 (three months ago)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RHYbm6K0HlU
― c u (crüt), Tuesday, 2 December 2025 22:42 (two months ago)
lol @ « encircled »
― budo jeru, Tuesday, 2 December 2025 22:45 (two months ago)
heh that was good
― kinder, Friday, 5 December 2025 23:18 (two months ago)
They're in a golden age at the moment imo, just hit after hit.
― LocalGarda, Friday, 5 December 2025 23:21 (two months ago)
From the Hard Times
Trump Awarded Hormel Peace Prize
https://thehardtimes.net/wp-content/uploads/sites/9/2025/12/trump-award.jpg
― Andy the Grasshopper, Friday, 5 December 2025 23:25 (two months ago)
Missed opportunity to make the medal a disc of processed meat.
― Josh in Chicago, Friday, 5 December 2025 23:31 (two months ago)
not the Onion but:
WOW! AN HONOR! — GCN pic.twitter.com/93QmN531X5— Governor Newsom Press Office (@GovPressOffice) December 6, 2025
― StanM, Saturday, 6 December 2025 15:32 (two months ago)
imo fails because the actual cannot be surpassed— kohls is not particularly corrupt enough
― beige accent rug (Hunt3r), Saturday, 6 December 2025 15:46 (two months ago)
It *is* America’s largest source of tshirts where you can cut off the sleeves
― Modollno Kahn (Boring, Maryland), Saturday, 6 December 2025 17:14 (two months ago)
https://theonion.com/student-whos-been-in-3-school-shootings-starting-to-think-this-might-be-about-him/
― challopvious (sleeve), Friday, 19 December 2025 16:02 (one month ago)