Things you were shockingly old when you learned

the truth about santa claus. being a rapist that is.

that lamb and sheep are the same species

ok looking upthread i just realized my santa=rapist joke is like the second joke involving rape on this thread. gross.

Things you were shockingly old when you learned: i'm a douchebag

That "quantum" is also a noun

international harvester's main claim to fame is tractors:

http://www.livinghistoryfarm.org/farminginthe50s/media/machines0201.jpg

but i'd be all over an IH fridge

Nabisco: I shall offer to solace (transitive verb) you kindly upon your troubled realization.

He's lucky you didn't offer to thunderball it...

When comedians are guests on talk shows they are just doing their routines and not having funny conversations off the cuff

I can (and will) thunderball solace.

pronunciation: I thought "chitin" rhymed with "kitten" for most of my life.

not pronunciation: don't know an exact age for this one, but for several years after reaching sexual maturity, I was under the impression that the vagina and urethra were two basically identical, indistinguishable holes, with the hapless male forced to pick one at random and start plugging away. astute readers may be able to use this information to deduce something about my sexual activity during this time period.

international harvester's main claim to fame is tractors:

makes sense. you've heard of farm-to-table? this is tractor-to-fridge!

fiance = man
fiancee = woman

I didn't even notice that they were two different words

blond/blonde
divorce-with-accent-mark/divorcee

Shaw is pronounced exactly the same as Shore, in England.

Thanx, Poo! Whew! I wasn't praying there wasn't some sort of ridiculously common tool called a sandishaw.

(i.e. it's a pun on "I am from the town of Fife, my good fellow" in broad scots)

How shockingly old are you when you now learn that Fife isn't a town?

On the subject of pun-based singer names, Manda Rin dawned on me about six years after I first heard of her. I just thought it was a couple of words, it never occurred to me to say it out loud, or look at the actual two words written down in close proximity.

what about ari up?

^^ could not make sense of that one until JUST RIGHT NOW

Wait, what is the Ari Up pun?

hurry up?

Aye, in Cockney/estuary English. That's how I've always read it anyway.

I was about 30 before I realised Adam Ant was a pun, and about 36 before I realised Perry Farrell was also a pun.

Adam Ant I realised earlier this year, aged 23. Perry Farrell, I got... right now.

I've known about three of the things mentioned so far. I'm especially clueless when it comes to food. I learned what fondue was a couple of months ago when I didn't know how to draw it in a game of Cranium, which resulted in a lot of disbelieving laughter heading my way.

Perry Farrell ... holee shit. How did that ever escape my notice!?

I remember reading Liz Fraser of the Cocteaus saying she used to believe that goosebump/shiver sensation was her blood changing direction cause that's what someone told her as a kid. I think she believed it right into her teens.

Driving on the I-90 west near Albany a few years ago, I read one of the big green signs over the highway. I turned to my wife and said, "I love the name of that town: 'Sheh-neck-ta-dee'...."

She promptly clued me in to the correct pronunciation.

Shit, never realised about Perry Farrell. Or the fiance/fiancee thing---I thought they were jsut different attempts to Englishise the same French word without having to use an accent mark. I'm an editor, and have a sinking feeling I may have "corrected" this in other people's work more than once. Fuck.

It was only last year that I realised Iggy Pop was a pun! For someone who likes to make a lot of lame puns myself, it's pretty shameful.

Iggy Pop? I don't get it!

I was just kidding.

Sorry.

That Dr Dean Edell is a man...somehow I heard "Dina Dell" and pictured a woman.

That "La Cucaracha" is about cockroaches.

that you can just lift the silverware thing right out of the dishwasher and carry it over to the silverware drawer

― Tracer Hand, Wednesday, November 12, 2008 9:58 AM (8 hours ago) Bookmark

lol, this was such a moment of truth for me.

I used to think that the "people who live in glass houses" expression meant that people who are in the public eye or who are easily seen shouldn't do disgraceful things. I had a big ah-ha moment when it dawned on me.

I mispronounced segue as "seeg" until about a year ago :/

In my defense, it *is* pronounced that way as a musical term (well, so I've heard anyway) but yeah. Whoops.

Oh also, I thought samhain was said how it's spelt. I dont actually know how it *is* said, I just recently read some ppl scoffing online "omg they said it wrong!" and I was all "errr... oh dear".

I thought Samhain was said how it's spelt too!

I looked it up, apparently it's 'sow-en'? That's the trouble with Gaelic, you just never know...

Until a couple of years ago I thought 'obtuse' meant abstruse or odd, and that 'fulsome praise' was enthusiastic praise.

i used to pronounce hyperbole as "hyper bowl" :( :( until i was in my 20s :( :( :( :(

I've heard misusing obtuse is a common one.

I got called obtuse by a very charming anonymous person on this very forum once (via livejournal), and I had to wonder wether they were trying to suggest that I was difficult, or stupid.

I'd much rather the former, obviously.

Apparently the correct pronunciation of syndrome is so that it rhymes with 'sing to me' - but you'd be a wanker if you pronounced it that way.

The way people use 'obtuse' and 'fulsome' these days indicates that the word itself is changing meaning. Sitll, it's a shock when you find out how these words are defined, and realise you've been insulting people for years unintentionally.

that you can just lift the silverware thing right out of the dishwasher and carry it over to the silverware drawer

*Slaps forehead*

That was news to me too - another useful tip from ILX, and a black eye to all who say this place is a waste of time.

I always thought 'enervated' meant excited...but it means tired. Which is not how it sounds...

it took me a while to figure out "pneumonia" a) was not pronounced "puh-new-monia" and b) was the same illness as "new-monia"

I listened to Fishbone's "Party at Ground Zero" for almost 20 years before I learned they were saying "and the world will turn to glowing pink vapor stew" in the chorus.

I just made hollandaise for the first time a few days ago does that count.

someone explain the perry farrell pun to me please

peripheral

didn't know what a blt was until age 26

after reading that thread that day, every time i've lifted the silverware thing out of the dishwasher and carried it over to the drawer for emptying i have given full credit to tracer hand.

well that does explains the handle. sheesh.