Great Real Names

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When I was working fundraising calls for the university, I had a person on my list called My Wang.

It's the lazy and immoral way to become super hip. (Austin, Still), Thursday, 26 October 2006 15:13 (eighteen years ago) link

The Book of Heroic Failures mentions someone called Depressed Cupboard Cheesecake. That's pretty bad.

Treblekicker (treblekicker), Thursday, 26 October 2006 15:31 (eighteen years ago) link

three weeks pass...
Today I was looking for a CV from a commercials company - the person I had to speak to was called Di11y Gent.

=== temporary username === (Mark C), Tuesday, 21 November 2006 12:27 (seventeen years ago) link

Yesterday I sent an email to someone named Venus Speedwell.

Euai Kapaui (tracerhand), Tuesday, 21 November 2006 12:32 (seventeen years ago) link

Big round of applause for Redditch United centreback Exodus Geohaghan.

dommy p is alright WHICH IS A LOT MORE THAN I CAN SAY ABOUT A LOT OF PEOPLE (Dom, Tuesday, 21 November 2006 12:34 (seventeen years ago) link

My mom recently went to a talk on the viscoelastic properties of mucus, given by one Prof. Richard Superfine.

Good-Time Slim, Uncle Doobie, and the Great 'Frisco Freak-Out (sixteen sergeants, Tuesday, 21 November 2006 12:37 (seventeen years ago) link

six months pass...

DeLorean Churby

OMG

Hurting 2, Thursday, 14 June 2007 02:30 (seventeen years ago) link

I knew someone once called Barry Ireland. It's very funny if you're Welsh.

nate woolls, Thursday, 14 June 2007 08:56 (seventeen years ago) link

My aunt had a childhood playmate named Tucker Plumstead.

I went to college with a girl named Guinevere Schmuck.

The recently-retired CFO of my company is named C0nn1e Cumm1ng5, and yet is not a pornstar.

Phil D., Thursday, 14 June 2007 13:20 (seventeen years ago) link

two months pass...

Michael D. Jew (defendant in a lawsuit I just read)

Hurting 2, Wednesday, 22 August 2007 16:32 (seventeen years ago) link

two months pass...

Random Justice Phillips

Hurting 2, Tuesday, 6 November 2007 15:32 (seventeen years ago) link

three weeks pass...

Did I not post Manjula Icecreamwalla?

Hurting 2, Wednesday, 28 November 2007 03:34 (sixteen years ago) link

somebody in my class once was apparently named Man-On Chin

Bo Jackson Overdrive, Wednesday, 28 November 2007 03:36 (sixteen years ago) link

kenny gee

Hurting 2, Wednesday, 12 December 2007 01:40 (sixteen years ago) link

http://www.sullivanandcromwell.com/lawyers/detail.aspx?attorney=140

sanskrit, Wednesday, 12 December 2007 01:52 (sixteen years ago) link

I used one of those address look-up things for an internship. I remember the last name in the registry was Zolton Zzzytwit. I was also surprised by the number of people with the last name Hitler in the US.

clotpoll, Wednesday, 12 December 2007 04:28 (sixteen years ago) link

Rear Admiral John Stufflebeam

Also: When I was in grade school, my friends and I used to look up odd names in the phone book, make "clever" little rhymes or poems about the names, and prank call said individuals. Some names I remember from those days:

Dirk Greep, Zoltan Papp, Vernon Winklepleck

Pillbox, Wednesday, 12 December 2007 04:33 (sixteen years ago) link

i knew a dude with the last name Manlove once

Bo Jackson Overdrive, Wednesday, 12 December 2007 04:35 (sixteen years ago) link

More: Boutros-Boutros Ghali; Shecki "the Jackyl"

Pillbox, Wednesday, 12 December 2007 04:35 (sixteen years ago) link

Rageing Warr, convicted in Indiana of "battery by body waste"

Hurting 2, Thursday, 13 December 2007 14:36 (sixteen years ago) link

apparently that just referred to her spitting in a cop's face, which is not as gross as I was imagining

Hurting 2, Thursday, 13 December 2007 14:41 (sixteen years ago) link

A woman at my work has the first name Godsent.

franny glass, Thursday, 13 December 2007 18:56 (sixteen years ago) link

There's a U.S. District Court judge in Pennsylvania named Sylvia Rambo. This is mostly just funny because on her opinions it says "Rambo, District Judge"

Hurting 2, Friday, 14 December 2007 15:42 (sixteen years ago) link

Zaytoon Matchiswala {Olive of the Match family}

Crêpe, Friday, 14 December 2007 15:59 (sixteen years ago) link

in retrospect, Aym3ric Fr@ise is kinda interesting

gabbneb, Wednesday, 19 December 2007 17:59 (sixteen years ago) link

From upthread, I used to know D1lly Gent!

Good one in my own family, my great-grandfather, LaMonte Mercereau.

suzy, Wednesday, 19 December 2007 18:52 (sixteen years ago) link

Ruby Mae Mozingo

Alex in Baltimore, Wednesday, 2 January 2008 17:18 (sixteen years ago) link

gurf morlix

gff, Wednesday, 2 January 2008 17:39 (sixteen years ago) link

Sophal Um

Alex in Baltimore, Wednesday, 2 January 2008 17:43 (sixteen years ago) link

Junior Agogo.

Grandpont Genie, Thursday, 3 January 2008 11:33 (sixteen years ago) link

Gillian Mckeith has a daughter called Afton Magaziner.

With a last name like that, I'd at least try to give my child a semblance of normality with a usual sounding first name. But Afton? Isn't that in Surrey somewhere?

JTS, Friday, 4 January 2008 03:24 (sixteen years ago) link

Knox Burger

And I once worked with a campanologist called Dickon Love.

Michael Dudikoff presents Action Adventure Theatre, Friday, 4 January 2008 15:12 (sixteen years ago) link

I swear to god: Britney Timberlake.

franny glass, Friday, 4 January 2008 15:17 (sixteen years ago) link

V0ndarius H4wk1ns

My friend had him as a student in...2d grade, I think?

B.L.A.M., Friday, 4 January 2008 15:38 (sixteen years ago) link

Joseph Metallic

Alex in Baltimore, Monday, 7 January 2008 14:58 (sixteen years ago) link

Burnelle Burnell

Alex in Baltimore, Tuesday, 15 January 2008 15:04 (sixteen years ago) link

Chief Kickingstallionsims, a 7-0, 245 pound center for Alabama State.

Pleasant Plains, Tuesday, 15 January 2008 15:36 (sixteen years ago) link

Dusky R1de0ut

kate78, Tuesday, 15 January 2008 22:51 (sixteen years ago) link

Guy I know lived with a S0rley 4rthur Cleb0.

jim, Tuesday, 15 January 2008 22:55 (sixteen years ago) link

One of my clients had the first name J4tlaneezy, and another was W00lfdy.

miryam, Tuesday, 15 January 2008 23:17 (sixteen years ago) link

Byron F. Iglesias

Alex in Baltimore, Thursday, 17 January 2008 20:52 (sixteen years ago) link

Reza Rezorei

Alex in Baltimore, Friday, 25 January 2008 20:52 (sixteen years ago) link

Rear Admiral Husband Edward Kimmel.

call all destroyer, Friday, 25 January 2008 21:38 (sixteen years ago) link

There was a name change application in one of the courts I cover filed by a guy named Mohammed Butt

It was actually for his daughter, whose name was something like Shareefa Butt.

He actually wrote, under reason for name change, "I want my daughter to stop being the butt of jokes"

But the best part was that the court office lady who showed it to me went on like this for about five minutes straight:

"Hi there, I'm Mr. Butt"
(long pause)
"Hey, I'm Mr. Butt, I'm here for my appointment."
(long pause)
"This is my wife, Mrs. Butt"

Hurting 2, Friday, 8 February 2008 05:51 (sixteen years ago) link

I met a bunch of people from this cult. I worked in a restaurant next to their "offices".

They all have retarded names. Like "heart spider", "morning Cloud", "Puff the magic dragon".

W4LTER, Friday, 8 February 2008 06:02 (sixteen years ago) link

oh yeah, I also had a lawsuit once where all the plaintiffs were members of some weird christian sect and were named stuff like Wonderful Friendship Jackson and Loving Hope Freeman

Hurting 2, Friday, 8 February 2008 06:03 (sixteen years ago) link

Jason Math

Alex in Baltimore, Monday, 11 February 2008 17:13 (sixteen years ago) link

just read this on cnn about the chinese espionage bust:

Dongfan "Greg" Chung, 72, a Chinese native who is a naturalized U.S. citizen, had been an employee of Rockwell International for more than 30 years.

yeah, i suppose i'd go by "greg" too.

chicago kevin, Monday, 11 February 2008 20:22 (sixteen years ago) link

two months pass...

There is a cricketer called Napoleon Einstein, he plays for the Chennai Super Kings!

jel --, Monday, 21 April 2008 17:03 (sixteen years ago) link


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