tipping

Karen, it is not irrational to get angry about that term.

Mom I'd Like to (Have) Fun (With)

MILF is like the Howard Stern of words

yummy mummies refers more to class, iiuc? Has an SUV, kids sent to creche, dines at fabulous eateries for lunch, that sort of thing? Or, at least, i don't think it's quite the same as milf

I object to "MILF" on ideological grounds, and "yummy mummies" on linguistic grounds. Also ideological grounds. Just quit making up cutesy terms for women with children that you find attractive, as though they are so strange an phenomenon that the heretofore perfectly useful "attractive person" no longer applies.

Wow, so totally wrong. A couple twenties == tip for what this person is ordinarily doing in their line of work. This is like if you went to a restaurant and ordered a cup of black coffee and then vomited all over the server and left three quarters and a couple pennies on the counter.

I don't know where you live but I can't imagine a couple twenties is normal for a lap dance or whatever; the problem here is that you are definitely getting kicked out if you do this so it's basically whatever you have on you

I think actually darragh is right, that Yummy Mummy has more of a lifestyle and class element to it than simply noting their physical attractiveness. That is slightly less annoying because it is actually noting something inherent in the woman herself (even if it is something as shallow as her class or lifestyle) rather than simply pointing out that the observer wants to mate with her, which is entirely external, as if she does not have essence or being in her self. But perhaps they are more annoying as people than "MILFs" because if godhelpme I walk over to Balham, then Yummy Mummies en masse with their enourmous SUV sized perambulators and even bigger sized entitlement issues, getting in the bloody way when you just want a cup of coffee will also make me IA.

So it's odd that you, Jenny, pick up on the entitlement issues of the writer, when the writer is probably carping about the entitlement issues of women of a certain class. (That said, the fact that she is writing for the Guardian probably means she is very likely of a very similar class?)

Then again, the entire neighbourhood of "Balham" probably deserves to be on the "things that make you IA" thread. And this thread is about tipping.

Now that I know that "yummy mummies" is a UK class-issue thing, I will not be touching it again with a ten foot pole.

I am loving your new display name, Ms Tregaskin.

In other news, this thread's latest episodes are reminding me of how I never want to live in the USA for fear that I either get stuck in some kind of low paid job where I am relying on the generosity of strangers or end up causing confusion and awkwardness by either not tipping enough or tipping in inappropriate situations.

I also hate the word "yummy" tbf.

And why is a rich mother described as "yummy"? Probably a Brit/USA communication breakdown but if the meaning of "yummy" is still "tasty," how is that supposed to be a class-related descriptor? I'm not saying it isn't - I'm just saying the phrase is abysmally stupid and people who use it shouldn't be allowed to publish their opinions on the internet.

Young Upwardly Mobile Mother?

Also "Mummy" is often used as a middle-class signifier - poor people have Mums.

rich people have nannies

i think it's almost phonetic, relating to how a proclivity towards declaring things, eg tartlets made from responsibly-sourced apples, 'yummy', might reflect on the proclaimer. almost pronounced yammy.

did Al jolson have a Yammy Mammy?

yummy mummy = soccer mom (in my head)

Kate otm about why it's less troubling than milf.

'Yummy' rhymes with mummy, i dunno is it even any deeper than that tbh.

So would poor people really not call their mothers "mummy"?

In Chicago we call "yummy mummies" "Trixies" because somebody back in time before the popular TV series Deadwood decided that "Trixie" was the poshest name s/he could think of. Though Trixies refers to any entitled actin woman, not just mothers.

I object to "soccer mom," too, mostly because of the attention/criticism for this is directed at women who bear the greater burden of childcare duties and then get rewarded with derisive labels. It's is more complex than I want to get into with my thumbs but I definitely agree that MILF is the worst.

poor people in the uk are orphans, kkvgz

http://www.oldstratforduponavon.com/sitebuilder/images/olivertwist-314x518.jpg

I just always get so frustrated trying to sort out what is real and what is trolling in re UK-class issues.

Posh ppl just call their mothers "Mater" because we were all taught perfect Latin at boarding school.

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/0/07/Yummy_Mummy.jpeg

Thanks Phil, I was associating that phrase with egyptian-themed marshmallows and couldn't remember why!

In Chicago we call "yummy mummies" "Trixies" because somebody who had never seen or possibly heard of The Honeymooners decided that "Trixie" was the poshest name s/he could think of. Though Trixies refers to any entitled actin woman, not just mothers.

Fixed.

I'm still going to tip, but please do not do that.

Kinda dick post, I get where they're coming from on some of that stuff, I hate the fakey-friendlyness, but places I've worked you're really required/expected to do that stuff, and also you have no idea how well it works on other tables. I try to strike a balance, my serving persona is ideally like cool/kinda wry guy who figures out that you're just there to eat and get out and accommodates that for you, but still, I mean
7. Don't keep asking, "Can I get you anything else?" Just bring me the check and I'll leave. - - then ask for the fucking check, stupid! I don't want to drop it on your table and THEN you go "Ohhh, what were your desserts again?" or "Oh, can we get that split up?" or "Oh, we have a coupon for a discount" etc etc.

I hate it when they ask "can I get you anything else?" because I have family members who will say "yes."

Obligatory bitching post: So last night I had a table that walked in at 9:54 (we close at 10). I greeted them warmly, they asked when we closed, I said 10, they were kind of vaguely apologetic about it and the one lady was like "Your waitresses are going to be mad at you!" As I was seating them, I was like, "Well, actually, I'm the server as well, so no worries!" (In my head thinking: A) Why would you joke about how pissed-off the people who work in a restaurant are for you coming in right when they're closing, and B) Why would you think the host, who is going to have to stand around and wait for the table to get closed anyway so they can count the drawer, would be less pissed-off than the server?) Anyway, I served them, gave them totally normal service, rattled off the specials, kept their water filled, yadda yadda, they sat there until 10:45. Split checks: one lady who got just the quesadillas ($7 ticket) tipped me $5. Dig it, she gets the deal. The other check, paid by "your waitresses" lady, was a $40 ticket, they tipped... $5. Whaaaaaaaaaaat the fuck, fuck you, fuck YOU, and fuck YOU! These are people who know and specifically acknowledge that they are keeping me at work an hour past when I thought I was going to leave, and they are tipping me barely over ten percent. aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaagghhhhhh

sorry, is there another thread that's just like "rolling service industry shithole bitching thread"?

probably, but this one seems fine for your legit beef

I almost think that's the exact name of it!

Maybe quesadilla lady knew the others were bad tippers and was covering for them, $10 on a $47 bill isn't bad.

Not to be dickish, but if your business really wants to shut down at 10 it shouldn't seat people at 9:55. Blame your managemnet for that.

my personal pet peeve is when you get the check before you're even done eating. seems to happen all the time here. but hey

$10 on a $47 bill is just over 20%, so yes, a reasonable enough tip at 7:30. But walking into a restaurant when they're about to close is horrible behavior that makes everyone hate you. Posted hours, yeah, but you go, "In my internal moral calculus, I am going to make a bunch of people stick around at the job they hate for an hour to wait on one table. This is not a nice thing to do to people."

I do blame management in part - we used to have a policy where we took last orders at 10 and last seating at 9:45, because obviously, you seat somebody at 10, they're not ordering right that second. This has changed. Meanwhile, they're paying hourlies out to a server, possibly a host/cashier, and the cook. (Note, I have been working there for a year and a half at starting pay; there is a raise freeze because labor costs are too high.)

But really, don't ever sit down in an empty restaurant within 30 minutes of their stated close time. I know people who would go as far as to say an hour. Numerous people, tipped and untipped, are trying to clean the place up, both in the front and in the back of the house. Again you might say "tough shit, that's their job" but if that's your attitude you are probably already a horrible tipper and we don't want you anyway.

xpost we are required to drop the check with the food when serving breakfast, due to company policy that assumes breakfast eaters are in a big hurry to catch a flight/get to the big meeting/etc. We can get failed for not doing that on a secret-shopper thing.

But really, don't ever sit down in an empty restaurant within 30 minutes of their stated close time.

Back when I worked in restaurants, I wished this was the case, but it was hardly ever the fucking case.

so 38% of my last paycheck was taxed away. thank you credit tips. gonna go join the tea party now.

tomorrow is the first day since the 19th that i'm not working, and i've made some good money but jesus christ i can't wait to sleep in

Oh god, credit tips must have gotten so much worse in the last decade!

It's a huge problem! Also I work in a hotel so tons of people just sign to the room, also documented and taxed. Comes with the territory though and balanced by slightly higher hourlies, plus health insurance (expensive and shitty, but still).

There was actually a mini-controversy locally when a restaurant started doing a dinner service (they're a lunch place) and a local reviewer caught wind of this and showed up. She unfortunately showed up five minutes before closing, and the owner said "sure, we'll serve you, as long as you promise this isn't for a review". Which makes sense, because they weren't officially starting their dinner service for a few days and it was a dry run, and she was also there right at close.

She said something like "well, I can't guarantee anything" and she blogged about it and was all huffy about the fact that the owner opened the door back up and held it for her so she could leave!

so when you pay by credit in an ideal world you should leave a cash tip?

that's what i try to do and i understand it's "the way to go"

i gave a waitress in denny's a, like, $14 tip or something once in 2006 just because

It sounds like you could have said "Sorry, the kitchen closes right at ten" then given a little eye-roll to say "those lazy cooks!" and gotten rid of them. But if your bosses are monitoring, then I retract everything. And for the record, I would never go into a place just before the posted closing time and expect service.

hi i pay taxes on my income

It sounds like you could have said "Sorry, the kitchen closes right at ten" then given a little eye-roll to say "those lazy cooks!" and gotten rid of them.

Agreed totally, used to do this! New manager guy is really committed to holding this official closing time, if one complaint gets back to him heads will roll etc. etc.

btw that table I was bitching about came back again tonight, this time at 9:15 so OK. Good lady tipped ~$4 for her one meal. Bad lady again tipped ~$4 for the three people on her check. Also I already hold them in really low esteem so they'd really have to do a lot to win me back over. Warning to the world, even if you are a douche with some chip on your shoulder about your contrarian, iconoclastic bad-tipping ways, never crack jokes with wait staff about how severely you are inconveniencing them or how poorly you will tip them.

dag

http://www.thepostgame.com/blog/dish/201108/tiger-woods-regains-no-1-ranking-tightwad-tippers

http://bumpshack.com/2008/05/08/bad-tipper-lebron-james-tips-125-on-800-tab/