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God bless the goddamn Onion

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o shi i hadn't seen these cartoons before -- awesome.

― That one guy that hit it and quit it, Wednesday, 16 January 2008 16:36 (eighteen years ago)

"After my baby didn't babble or gesture after 12 months, I hoped the cause was autism. I've since learned he's dead."

― That mong guy that's shit, Wednesday, 16 January 2008 16:47 (eighteen years ago)

Haha OMG:

First Indian-American Governor Elected

With his swearing in as governor of Louisiana on Monday, Republican Bobby Jindal became the first Indian-American to head a U.S. state. What do you think?

Dave Piedmont,
Systems Analyst

"His parents must be so close to being proud."

― nabisco, Thursday, 17 January 2008 01:01 (eighteen years ago)

one month passes...

Steven Seagal is...

― Kerm, Wednesday, 5 March 2008 22:09 (eighteen years ago)

http://www.theonion.com/content/opinion/act_now_to_take_advantage_of_my

story of my life

― and what, Wednesday, 5 March 2008 22:45 (eighteen years ago)

lol "Skeepers"

― Jordan, Wednesday, 5 March 2008 22:47 (eighteen years ago)

haha deja vu

me: http://www.theonion.com/content/opinion/act_now_to_take_advantage_of_my
Sent at 4:31 PM on Wednesday
Jordan: haha
lol "skeepers"

― deej, Wednesday, 5 March 2008 22:50 (eighteen years ago)

http://www.theonion.com/content/files/images/act_now_oped.jpg

: /

― Bodrick III, Wednesday, 5 March 2008 22:56 (eighteen years ago)

that's totally the lowered-standards look

... anonymous sex with me that I'll begin to regret it as it's happening?
oh double-edged zing

― rrrobyn, Wednesday, 5 March 2008 23:00 (eighteen years ago)

http://www.theonion.com/content/node/75350

― Dr Morbius, Friday, 7 March 2008 21:38 (eighteen years ago)

Haha, i worked at the Skeepers in Ann Arbor from '98 - '00.

― kingfish, Saturday, 8 March 2008 03:22 (eighteen years ago)

http://www.theonion.com/content/files/images/onionmagazine_archive_101a.jpg

― That one guy that hit it and quit it, Saturday, 15 March 2008 13:13 (eighteen years ago)

"Microwave Quietly Encouraged"

― calstars, Saturday, 15 March 2008 13:42 (eighteen years ago)

the onion magazine + editorial cartoons are my fav shit now

― and what, Saturday, 15 March 2008 14:13 (eighteen years ago)

Kelly is a genius.

― Bodrick III, Saturday, 15 March 2008 14:37 (eighteen years ago)

http://www.theonion.com/content/opinion/you_know_whats_stupid

One of my fave pieces for a long time, great concept.

― Bodrick III, Saturday, 15 March 2008 14:39 (eighteen years ago)

Bob can go fuck himself for those shoes/boots.

― wanko ergo sum, Saturday, 15 March 2008 17:18 (eighteen years ago)

wow that link is one of the least funny Onion pieces I've read. Diff'rent strokes.

― wanko ergo sum, Saturday, 15 March 2008 17:25 (eighteen years ago)

I think it's funny.

― chap, Saturday, 15 March 2008 17:26 (eighteen years ago)

that craig kilborn bit they did a few months ago (which i conveniently cannot find a link to right now) was one of the best things they've ever done

― the sir weeze, Saturday, 15 March 2008 18:18 (eighteen years ago)

wow that link is one of the least funny Onion pieces I've read. Diff'rent strokes.

-- wanko ergo sum, Saturday, 15 March 2008 17:25

Think it's because this character = almost everybody I work with.

They have trouble understanding complex, intellectual ideas like "Maybe not every problem with the UK today can be blamed on asylum seekers."

― Bodrick III, Saturday, 15 March 2008 20:50 (eighteen years ago)

http://www.theonion.com/content/video/in_the_know_is_the_government

― C0L1N B..., Saturday, 15 March 2008 21:32 (eighteen years ago)

I think it's funny.

yeah, i like it too. I usually enjoy their "explicitly deconstructing thoughtless everyday habits" bits.

― kingfish, Saturday, 15 March 2008 21:39 (eighteen years ago)

two weeks pass...

Haha this joke would appear to be entirely coincidental, and yet ...

COLUMN: Smoove B signs off -- "Girl, there comes a time when even a strong, well-dressed man must admit defeat."

AMERICAN VOICES TOPIC: "Farmers Planting Less Corn"

― nabisco, Wednesday, 2 April 2008 20:09 (eighteen years ago)

i'm dying here.

― s1ocki, Wednesday, 2 April 2008 20:22 (eighteen years ago)

cherry coke all over my monitor

― balls, Wednesday, 2 April 2008 20:24 (eighteen years ago)

two months pass...

The Onion Movie is surprisingly terrible

― If Assholes Could Fly This Place Would Be An Airport, Monday, 23 June 2008 02:37 (eighteen years ago)

surprisingly

― Hurting 2, Monday, 23 June 2008 02:41 (eighteen years ago)

""

― J0rdan S., Monday, 23 June 2008 02:42 (eighteen years ago)

Oh, I didn't know we don't like the Onion here anymore.

ILX = It's the British press for your iphone!

― If Assholes Could Fly This Place Would Be An Airport, Monday, 23 June 2008 02:43 (eighteen years ago)

yeah wtf happened with the onion movie. The books were always great.

― Matt Armstrong, Monday, 23 June 2008 03:44 (eighteen years ago)

liking the onion and thinking that "onion: the movie" is a terrible idea are two completely different things. that's probably what Hurting 2 meant since he usually states the obvious, don't act dense and butthurt about it If Assholes Could Fly This Place Would Be An Airport.

― strgn, Monday, 23 June 2008 04:19 (eighteen years ago)

If Assholes Were Butthurt This Place Would Be A Butt Hospice

― s1ocki, Monday, 23 June 2008 04:22 (eighteen years ago)

If arseholes were Robbie Williams's last CD this place would be a road in China.

― moley, Monday, 23 June 2008 04:42 (eighteen years ago)

Onion movie = not actually made by The Onion, who disassociated themselves from it long ago..

― energy flash gordon, Monday, 23 June 2008 05:07 (eighteen years ago)

Ah, I did not know that. Figures...

― If Assholes Could Fly This Place Would Be An Airport, Monday, 23 June 2008 05:33 (eighteen years ago)

one month passes...

http://www.theonion.com/content/news/obamas_hillbilly_half_brother

― felicity, Wednesday, 13 August 2008 18:02 (eighteen years ago)

lolz "chicken-killing school"

― Shakey Mo Collier, Wednesday, 13 August 2008 18:04 (eighteen years ago)

In the past two weeks, Obama has lost support from such groups as PETA, which withdrew its endorsement when Cooter punched a swan in the face, claiming it was "one of them mean ones"; the Clean Energy Group, which protested Cooter's recent attempt to fry a squirrel in a flaming 20-gallon barrel of diesel fuel; and Sen. John Kerry (D-MA), whom Cooter mistook for an outhouse Monday and urinated on for 35 seconds.

― HI DERE, Wednesday, 13 August 2008 18:08 (eighteen years ago)

one month passes...

Man, the magazine is great sometimes.
http://www.theonion.com/content/magazine/another_small_town_with_fucked

― Everything is Highlighted (Hurting 2), Friday, 10 October 2008 22:46 (eighteen years ago)

http://www.theonion.com/content/files/images/onionmagazine_archive_144a.jpg

― Everything is Highlighted (Hurting 2), Friday, 10 October 2008 22:47 (eighteen years ago)

the current print copy full of archival stuff is hilar

― BIG HOOS aka the steendriver, Friday, 10 October 2008 22:48 (eighteen years ago)

http://www.theonion.com/content/files/images/DNC_archive.jpg

― Everything is Highlighted (Hurting 2), Wednesday, 15 October 2008 02:20 (eighteen years ago)

old I know, but it keeps cracking me up

― Everything is Highlighted (Hurting 2), Wednesday, 15 October 2008 02:20 (eighteen years ago)

This is my favorite this week.

Witnesses said they first detected a difference in McCain's demeanor yesterday, when he paused suddenly in the middle of a speech about Obama's tax policies, shook his head and demanded to know what year it was. Others were reportedly confused when McCain abruptly left the stage to find a mirror and softly touched his face while whispering to himself, "Oh, boy. Who am I this time?"

― crusty but benign (kenan), Wednesday, 15 October 2008 04:25 (eighteen years ago)

QL references get me every time.

― ☑ (Pleasant Plains), Wednesday, 15 October 2008 04:34 (eighteen years ago)

Ever notice how if you read too much Onion at once, actual news starts to resemble it more and more?

― crusty but benign (kenan), Wednesday, 15 October 2008 04:42 (eighteen years ago)

QL references get me every time.

^^^this

― Johnny Fever, Wednesday, 15 October 2008 04:59 (eighteen years ago)

three weeks pass...

http://www.theonion.com/content/video/obama_win_causes_obsessive?utm_source=embedded_video

― Dr Morbius, Thursday, 6 November 2008 20:21 (seventeen years ago)

lol, look at who's posting most to ilx about it

― gabbneb, Thursday, 6 November 2008 20:23 (seventeen years ago)


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