Star Wars 7 shit talk

Shit Wars

the phantom menace
attack of the clones
revenge of the sith
a new hope
the empire strikes back
return of the jedi
the force awakens

i feel like we're missing an event between the jedi returning and the force awakening. specifically when the force went to bed after the jedi returned

like star wars vii should be "hey isn't that the dude from girls LOOK OUT" and then the force awakens in viii

Maybe the whole movie is framed flashback.

Luke Jr: Daddy, where did the force come from?
Middle-aged Luke: Well son, I'll tell ya...

When a midichlorian loves another midichlorian very much...

Haha.

but the problem with abrams is he's a hack who thinks he's an auteur and has somehow been given the power of one.

This is LHC accurate everyone please read again.

APPARENTLY it will be called Episode VII in the opening crawl but that is NOT part of the official title

guess Disney are trying to get away from episode numbers due to infinite spinoffs

APPARENTLY it will be called Episode VII in the opening crawl but that is NOT part of the official title

How wonderful to live in a cultural landscape in which sentences such as this make even the slightest bit of sense.

Spinoffs/standalones to be given things like "Episode 7.5: That Han Solo Jawn"

It could have been almost any one of these titles and I would have been happier.

http://starwars.wikia.com/wiki/Ewoks_%28Marvel%29

"The Perilous Laughing Spell" would've been a helluva bold move

I have seen both Ewok movies fwiw

STAR WARS EPISODE 7: THAT GREEN RABBIT GUY FROM THE COMIX

never forget
http://img3.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20130925225715/starwars/images/1/13/Jaxxon.jpg

I watched one of them when it came on TV back in the 80s and it scared me too much to make it through. An Ewok gets killed or something? A scary monster? I don't know. I had been waiting to watch it for weeks but I couldn't hack.

Star Wars Episode VII: The Way To Succeed And The Way To Suck Eggs

lol

Rabbit guy actually seems like a viable character in a post-Guardians of the Galaxy world

you can The Force Awaken me when Rian Johnson's comes out

yeah, you'll be able to tell the difference, rrrright

David Fincher's STAR WARS EPISODE SE7EN

shouldn't it be "the force REawakens" or something -- would be a nice tip o the hat to the "reboot" as well

The Force Goes Back to Sleep

The Force is going to manifest itself as a sentient being. It's going to look like the most awesome action figure ever.

Han Solo, Wake Up and Wipe Your Shirt

xpost
http://www.oafe.net/shocka/art/rocky1tm2.jpg

they should just call it "star wars vii: the reboot"

Abrams: "But what if this time Luke is Vader's dad? Eh? Eh?"
Disney: "Here is your money, J.J. Abrams."

i loved that rumor about how after harrison hurt his foot jj and company pleaded with disney for more time so they could really do the series justice and disney was like "we give zero fucks if you do the series justice" because no one there actually cares about this property

between marvel and pixar and their own shit this is just some geek business guaranteed to pump up the bottom line even if it's garbage as proven by the prequels

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/8/87/The_Umpire_Strikes_Back.JPG

As far as the Walt Disney Corporation is concerned, a plea for something that will do justice to the Star Wars property is probably on par with a plea by a Disney Store regional manager for an increase in man hours to ensure that the window displays are exquisite.

yeah i mean the good news is if rian johnson writes a pearl of a script disney will probably be like "sure, whatevs" assuming the numbers crunch appropriately

where as marvel brass have ambitions beyond sucking the corpse dry

Spinoffs/standalones to be given things like "Episode 7.5: That Han Solo Jawn"

― Ned Raggett, Thursday, November 6, 2014 7:09 PM (3 hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

key post

strangely it's taken until hearing about this title for me to finally accept that JJ's star wars is gonna be complete shit

none of the prequel titles were even close to this bad

the force is an energy that suffuses all things and goes to sleep sometimes

"hey looks like you guys are handling this ok with your laser swords, gonna crash for a while. peace out."

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KQFho0_G1VI

If the Ewoks dont learn how to use the fore i am goign to be fuckenpissed

u&k

nothing wrong with "the force awakens", it's as pulpy as any of the others

you gotta remember, maximum pulp is gonna get us through this ting

^^^ love "whiny voice Vader"

Tracer OTM

maybe force awakens means everyone has the force now, ewoks included, and this is going to be 2.5 hours of shit flying everywhere. i'm in.

I'm expecting about 60% "You're pushing all the right buttons for this old timer, JJ" and 40% "Now why'd he have to go and do that obvious move aimed at the Millenials" from this film. With it skewing more and more toward the latter response as the series continues.

60% quality sound mix 40% lens flares

Yes, I'm old. And, yes, I wanna see Chewieand the gang blast shit. And Luke pulling back some cowl or Jedi hoodie he's wearing upon first appearance- because you know this is gonna happen. An essential SW shot - and the audience losing their shit.

That, too, da croupier