Star Wars 7 shit talk

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turns out the ball droid is a McQuarrie concept too btw

“I think Artoo was just described as a small robot. I thought of him as running on a giant ball bearing — just a sphere, a circle, wheel-like. He had gyros so he could go in any direction on this ball.”

Number None, Wednesday, 3 December 2014 16:33 (nine years ago) link

that's so cool.

how's life, Wednesday, 3 December 2014 16:39 (nine years ago) link

I liked Lisanti's description of R2 in the Grantland piece as a "squealing bipedal diaper genie"

18th Century Celebrity WS of Shame (Hurting 2), Wednesday, 3 December 2014 16:42 (nine years ago) link

tried to rewrite "Moses Supposes" from Singin' in the Rain for cortosis, gave up

things lose meaning over time (Dr Morbius), Wednesday, 3 December 2014 16:59 (nine years ago) link

with gyros in my balls, i could go in any direction

$0.00 Butter sauce only. No marinara. (Sufjan Grafton), Wednesday, 3 December 2014 17:12 (nine years ago) link

My ball gyros keep them in the same position/direction no matter which way I turn.

Evan, Wednesday, 3 December 2014 17:17 (nine years ago) link

Super painful if I turn too fast.

Scrumptuous Morsels For Your Tummy! (Old Lunch), Wednesday, 3 December 2014 17:18 (nine years ago) link

white sauce joke

18th Century Celebrity WS of Shame (Hurting 2), Wednesday, 3 December 2014 17:19 (nine years ago) link

how did no one make the "they should make the whole plane out of the stuff they use to make the black box" joke in Hurting/SaberGate

a stupid red mute juggalo (forksclovetofu), Wednesday, 3 December 2014 17:31 (nine years ago) link

prob bc it wouldn't be funny

18th Century Celebrity WS of Shame (Hurting 2), Wednesday, 3 December 2014 17:32 (nine years ago) link

they should make all of ilx out of hurting's posts

$0.00 Butter sauce only. No marinara. (Sufjan Grafton), Wednesday, 3 December 2014 17:35 (nine years ago) link

xp oh it would've been hilarious

a stupid red mute juggalo (forksclovetofu), Wednesday, 3 December 2014 17:35 (nine years ago) link

This effect made cortosis a useful material for anti-lightsaber melee weapons, though with repeated strikes, a lightsaber could still cut through it.

i can only imagine that looking like this:

http://media1.giphy.com/media/yowyM4bfXdCOA/giphy.gif

bizarro gazzara, Wednesday, 3 December 2014 18:08 (nine years ago) link

Nixon head is essential.

Evan, Wednesday, 3 December 2014 18:11 (nine years ago) link

lol

difficult-difficult lemon-difficult (VegemiteGrrl), Wednesday, 3 December 2014 18:16 (nine years ago) link

who is playing nixon head in ep 7

Scrumptuous Morsels For Your Tummy! (Old Lunch), Wednesday, 3 December 2014 18:17 (nine years ago) link

greg grunberg

bizarro gazzara, Wednesday, 3 December 2014 18:19 (nine years ago) link

harry shearer natch

a stupid red mute juggalo (forksclovetofu), Wednesday, 3 December 2014 18:26 (nine years ago) link

ok what bothers me about the lightsaber hilt now is if there's lightsaber beam underneath the metal tube bits which would still protect the wielder if someone else strikes through it, why don't they encase the entire hilt with that metal material? it would break pretty easily yeah but until that happens it would protect the wielder from the beams and allow them to regain that lost mobility that comes from constantly worrying if you're going to pierce yourself if you make a single mistake

if anyone who knows me or just anyone who like googles me for any reason finds this post please know that this is not representative of who i am as a person, i'm a really cool guy who does cool things and i have a lot to offer

linda cardellini (zachlyon), Wednesday, 3 December 2014 19:43 (nine years ago) link

Forest is full of bugs. Lightsaber hilt is a bug zapper. Solved.

Gauranteed Love Reelationship Solution (Old Lunch), Wednesday, 3 December 2014 19:46 (nine years ago) link

The hilt can also be used for offense this way. Everybody is so concerned about this Jedi hurting itself like it is a goddamn baby.

$0.00 Butter sauce only. No marinara. (Sufjan Grafton), Wednesday, 3 December 2014 19:53 (nine years ago) link

yeah prob didn't become a dark jedi by being clumsy with swords

18th Century Celebrity WS of Shame (Hurting 2), Wednesday, 3 December 2014 19:54 (nine years ago) link

Chewie has a bionic arm now too according to concept art.

It's almost like bionic arms are a status symbol.

jmm, Wednesday, 3 December 2014 19:57 (nine years ago) link

Everybody is so concerned about this Jedi hurting itself like it is a goddamn baby. youngling

Οὖτις Δαυ & τηε Κνιγητσ (Phil D.), Wednesday, 3 December 2014 19:59 (nine years ago) link

lol

Οὖτις, Wednesday, 3 December 2014 20:00 (nine years ago) link

it'd be funny if the bionic chewie arm just gesticulated awkwardly and wildly like a regular wookie arm

18th Century Celebrity WS of Shame (Hurting 2), Wednesday, 3 December 2014 20:03 (nine years ago) link

what's the old joke "doc, that's amazing news, I couldn't play the piano at all before the accident"

18th Century Celebrity WS of Shame (Hurting 2), Wednesday, 3 December 2014 20:05 (nine years ago) link

what if chewie accidentally rips his own dick off with his bionic arm. he should have mittens.

$0.00 Butter sauce only. No marinara. (Sufjan Grafton), Wednesday, 3 December 2014 20:05 (nine years ago) link

what's the old joke "doc, that's amazing news, I couldn't play the piano at all before the accident"

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/BFeqoE0CcAAN6M7.jpg

Montgomery Burns' Jazz (Tarfumes The Escape Goat), Wednesday, 3 December 2014 20:10 (nine years ago) link

what if chewie accidentally rips his own dick off with his bionic arm. he should have mittens.

― $0.00 Butter sauce only. No marinara. (Sufjan Grafton), Wednesday, December 3, 2014 3:05 PM (14 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

So he can softly rip his own dick off? How would this help?

Evan, Wednesday, 3 December 2014 20:21 (nine years ago) link

Have you ever tried to grip a wookie's dick with mittens?

$0.00 Butter sauce only. No marinara. (Sufjan Grafton), Wednesday, 3 December 2014 20:24 (nine years ago) link

haha my first thought was
http://static.gamesradar.com/images/totalfilm/o/oveur.jpg

18th Century Celebrity WS of Shame (Hurting 2), Wednesday, 3 December 2014 20:26 (nine years ago) link

I love you canon.

However, Maul managed to survive his defeat at the hands of Kenobi. Through his hate and will to live, as well as his hatred against Kenobi, he reached out with the Force and grabbed an air vent.[8]

http://img4.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20120518041057/starwars/images/5/57/DarthScorpionKing-SWE.png

jmm, Wednesday, 3 December 2014 20:26 (nine years ago) link

The hilt can also be used for offense this way.

can't really see that happening tbh w/o having the opposite end of the hilt up to yr throat or something, or having your opponent in a weird position where the blade wouldn't hit them first anyway

this is the worst movie ever

linda cardellini (zachlyon), Wednesday, 3 December 2014 20:26 (nine years ago) link

I had this idea that ILX should "precover" Ep 7 by building an entire film around the trailer scenes

18th Century Celebrity WS of Shame (Hurting 2), Wednesday, 3 December 2014 20:28 (nine years ago) link

directed by lou reed

linda cardellini (zachlyon), Wednesday, 3 December 2014 20:30 (nine years ago) link

No one ever dies in the Star Wars extended universe, do they? They always manage to claw back out of the Sarlacc somehow.

jmm, Wednesday, 3 December 2014 20:30 (nine years ago) link

xxxp That Darth Maul thing was an entire story arc on the Clone Wars cartoon, where he was rescued by his brother -- I swear to god I am not making this up -- Savage Oppress*, and eventually given a regular pair of mechanical legs.

* This name was conceived by whichever one of Lucas's two daughters was a writer for the show. The younger one.

Οὖτις Δαυ & τηε Κνιγητσ (Phil D.), Wednesday, 3 December 2014 20:32 (nine years ago) link

Yeah but the plot of the movie is pretty obvious:

-A stormtrooper wakes up in the desert after a heavy night of drinking.
-Some X-wings take some now unemployed rebel soldiers wake-boarding
-Some clumsy nerd kills himself with his stupid fucking light saber hilt in the woods somewhere. Nobody was anywhere near him and his body is never found. Good riddance.

Evan, Wednesday, 3 December 2014 20:33 (nine years ago) link

BTW it's pronounced FRONKensteen SaVAJE oPRESS.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-7hBZNsPnyg

Οὖτις Δαυ & τηε Κνιγητσ (Phil D.), Wednesday, 3 December 2014 20:33 (nine years ago) link

what if darth maul accidentally rips his own dick off with his mechanical legs. he should have short pants with a supportive netting interior.

$0.00 Butter sauce only. No marinara. (Sufjan Grafton), Wednesday, 3 December 2014 20:34 (nine years ago) link

I don't think he has a dick anymore. Maybe his species never had dicks. hard to tell.

valleys of your mind (mh), Wednesday, 3 December 2014 20:36 (nine years ago) link

I don't think people you see at burning man classify as a separate "species"

Evan, Wednesday, 3 December 2014 20:39 (nine years ago) link

-A stormtrooper wakes up in the desert after a heavy night of drinking.

Cut to an uber taking the other stormtroopers home, when one suddenly realizes "where's Mike?"

18th Century Celebrity WS of Shame (Hurting 2), Wednesday, 3 December 2014 20:39 (nine years ago) link

(Indiana Jones enters)

$0.00 Butter sauce only. No marinara. (Sufjan Grafton), Wednesday, 3 December 2014 20:41 (nine years ago) link

*"where's Jango 1002993?"

linda cardellini (zachlyon), Wednesday, 3 December 2014 20:41 (nine years ago) link


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