start a victory garden and ration your IRRATIONALLY ANGRY feelings, part 3

online & podcast film/tv critics who are pathologically hung up on plausibility and often employ the phrases "totally took me out of it" "you have to follow the rules of the world you create"

idk I mean I'm completely eyeroll-y at people who hem and haw about "plot holes" for films like Batman (srsly saw a 35+ post thread about whether it was possible for Batman to escape the nuclear detonation in Dark Knight Rises), but I do think films should be internally consistent at least.

these two doofuses rolled up in a van behind me tonight at the gas station. waiting for my pump. apparently the two unoccupied pumps on the other side that were unobstructed by any object or vehicle were insufficient or they were unfamiliar with the concept of turning around. went inside to the food mart after gassing up, coming back out minutes later to see them still waiting behind my car, waiting for my pump at an empty gas station.

idk I mean I'm completely eyeroll-y at people who hem and haw about "plot holes" for films like Batman (srsly saw a 35+ post thread about whether it was possible for Batman to escape the nuclear detonation in Dark Knight Rises)

fuckin eyeroll nonsense imo. you are 100% notm

TO THE BATTHREAD

just 35+ seems awful low for a superhero-related argument tbf

(ftr if anyone can escape a nuclear detonation it's batman i mean come on)

oh what he's got his anti fuckin nuclear cape on that day bollocks

five posts and counting let's make this happen guys

anti fuckin nuclear cape and cowl

idgaf if he was wearing simon cowl he's the worlds richest rarebit after that blast

c'mon man he's the fuckin' batman - his superpower is being prepared for everything! no way would a mere trifle like being at ground zero of a colossal nuclear explosion do anything other than maybe ding one of his cowl's ears.

all this so he could what take a sneaky fortnight off in Paris with some chick from work? bollocks.

actually it's pretty well-documented that the batman is skilled in bomb disposal:

https://33.media.tumblr.com/d0b71509084e45fdb2e5a673203c6b8c/tumblr_mnw7mcMiWo1raa96go1_400.gif

I think everyone has their own level of how much internal inconsistency/implausibility they accept. My brother drives me nuts on this, he will dare to enjoy literally ANY FILM even when major plot points hinge on complete nonsense and won't be argued into not enjoying it. 'it was fun, you shouldn't read too much into it' gahh

Never watch season 2 of broadchurch btw

love that neither the nuns or the mom are phased by the bomb in the least

"oh look it's Batman - go get em tiger!"

The kind of stuff I'm talking about is this: I heard some guy from Battleship Pretension saying he couldn't watch "Jane the Virgin" because they have a multi-generational household in it, and he didn't think it was realistic that people would want to live with their grandparents. Another guy pointed out that such households are common, especially in lower income families. The first guy's response was "Okay. But I wasn't buying it. It took me out of it." The fuck?

That gif perfectly describes my current work status.

That Jane the Virgin critic is a wiener.

xp that is unreal.

PEOPLE WHO SNEEZE LOUDLY

my irrational explanation is that they need to get laid or have better sex

he couldn't watch "Jane the Virgin" because they have a multi-generational household in it, and he didn't think it was realistic that people would want to live with their grandparents.

The whole of Italy and Greece would like to have a word with this chap.

PEOPLE WHO SNEEZE LOUDLY

This is very IA-inducing. Also multiple-sneezers. Even if it's like, a family member who suffers from seasonal allergies and I KNOW he is miserable and doesn't want to be sneezing. After like the 6th sneeze I want to scream at him to shut up.

Also I'm sure I've mentioned this in a previous thread but it cannot be overstated: people with colds who sniff constantly instead of using a goddam tissue. Especially in quiet commuter trains.

The obnoxiously bright sound of the Martin "phosphor bronze" strings I just put on my guitar. So assy.

Oh man I am a hardcore serial sneezer and I try not to be too loud but sometimes after the fourth one I just have to really let loose so I can stop fucking sneezing.

Anyway, constant sniffing makes me utterly completely bananas and I hate it.

Also, one of my favorite tweets that I think about a lot: https://twitter.com/karenkilgariff/status/488154696557662208

Here's something for the thread: K's third bday party last weekend. Woman we used to be closer to, now divorced with new weird boyfriend, shows up very late, with boyfriend and WITHOUT her son (excuse about last minute problem with ex, but who the fuck comes to a kid bday without a kid?!), and the second they come in they corner me and start pitching me their new business idea in this very obviously practiced but terrible speech. With perspective, it seems more sad than IA-making, but at the moment I really felt like these people were violating something important to me.

I had to cut them off because H was telling me it was time to bring out the cake and they were oblivious and continued to spew their bad business idea. Definitely never inviting them again.

http://youtube/OkdLWuCRe0c

OK, I can get wanting to come anyway without kid in tow if reasons neccesitate and yr close, but yeah thats way out of line. Ugh!

I sneeze loudly, need to get laid, and have better sex. Thread otm.

same

xp I never really thought of her as close to the point of coming to my kid's bday without their kid, although I guess she's more H's friend than mine. It also came in a context of this hardly being the first odd shit she's ever done.

a good loud sneeze does feel heavenly, i do admit

One of the managers in my office does this insanely loud HAAAA CHOOOOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW sneeze that is so ridiculously theatrical and loud, it cannot be necessary. It scares the shit out of everyone when it happens.

gtfo I'll sneeze how I want its a little orgasm and its all mine

geez ok i take back the sex thing, sorry

Woman on a plane sneezes loudly several times within a minute and furrows her brow.

Woman next to her says, Are you ok?

Sneezer says Yeah, I'm fine. I just have this condition where every time I sneeze, I have an orgasm.

Oh, my, says the second woman. Are you taking anything for it?

Yes, says the first woman. Pepper.

I do not like thee, Doctor Fell,
The reason why - I cannot tell;
But this I know, and know full well,
I do not like thee, Doctor Fell

For Doctor Fell, substitute a certain coworker whom I'm not going to name here. Difficulty: He is the in-office trainer, and I need his approval if I am to be certified as an HTML prepper.

is that in case HTML takes over the world and we all die in anguish

I'm trying to use Google Calendar for the first time and I am losing my fucking mind because there is no margin at the bottom of the page. Is there a way to create one? My eyes and sanity can't handle it.

xp

Given that the job involves the preparation and distribution of U.S. Federal Government documents, the idea of going off the grid and living off the land in, say, rural Montana has a greater appeal than is normal for me.

I am on a web meeting/presentation deal where there's slides on the computer and then a conference call for the audio, and someone is on the call without muting his phone and is snorting and sniffing and blowing his nose pretty much constantly and I'm torn between being grossed out, amused, irrationally angry, and irrationally embarrassed about it.

Just politely ask them to put mute on. Happens all the time.

If I were a presenter, I would but as a participant, I would feel presumptuous.

nah, you gotta speak up, everyone will be thankful

Be a hero.

be the change carl

It's been an hour and a half now. It's too late.

next time!

LOL somebody just yawned.