Star Wars 7 shit talk

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You are all bearing in mind that the original series started with space nazis blowing their way into a shuttle, killing most of the defenders and torturing the shit out of one of our heroes, right?

Andrew Farrell, Tuesday, 20 October 2015 13:53 (eight years ago) link

Just pray that 'we are family' isn't a main theme.

I read this wrong and imagined John Williams sprinkling his score with an occasional Sister Sledge motif.

Don't Call Me A Lunkhead, You Dingbat! (Old Lunch), Tuesday, 20 October 2015 13:59 (eight years ago) link

I was most excited by the music in the trailer because it didnt (as far as I can tell) repeat an old motif.

Han and Leia's love theme is in there

Number None, Tuesday, 20 October 2015 14:27 (eight years ago) link

Maybe I need to see the trailer on a bigger screen, but I'm somehow less enthused after watching it? I'm sure (I hope) the movie isn't as po-faced as the new trailer makes it seem. It felt a lot less Star Wars-y than the first trailer.

― Don't Call Me A Lunkhead, You Dingbat! (Old Lunch), Tuesday, October 20, 2015 7:43 AM (1 hour ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

I think I've come to terms with the fact that no one in 2015 is going to be able to make a literal Episode VII, a pure continuation of the original trilogy, let alone a pure continuation of the original trilogy as perceived and absorbed by my 7-year-old self in spite of my now being 35. This looks faithful enough to the aesthetic and spirit of the original that I'll probably be happy with it.

on entre O.K. on sort K.O. (man alive), Tuesday, 20 October 2015 14:27 (eight years ago) link

Maybe I need to see the trailer on a bigger screen, but I'm somehow less enthused after watching it? I'm sure (I hope) the movie isn't as po-faced as the new trailer makes it seem. It felt a lot less Star Wars-y than the first trailer.

When Star Wars in general tries to not be po-faced, we end up with things like Ewoks and Jar-Jar.

I Am Curious (Dolezal) (DJP), Tuesday, 20 October 2015 14:31 (eight years ago) link

who scavenged vader's helmet from the funeral pyre?

some comic con fucks

The burrito of ennui (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Tuesday, 20 October 2015 14:35 (eight years ago) link

xpost It's a tightrope walk, for sure.

At any rate, my expectations are super low (thanks, George) so I'm sure it'll be entertaining and fine if not necessarily in the ballpark of what I might have prefered.

Don't Call Me A Lunkhead, You Dingbat! (Old Lunch), Tuesday, 20 October 2015 14:37 (eight years ago) link

all i'm asking for is avengers 1 levels of enjoyment

a llove spat over a llama-keeper (forksclovetofu), Tuesday, 20 October 2015 14:38 (eight years ago) link

Bigger! Louder! Faster! More emotion! More drama! More serious! Less fun!

Eh? I think it looks plenty fun.

the joke should be over once the kid is eaten. (chap), Tuesday, 20 October 2015 14:38 (eight years ago) link

Crazy chase through scuttled Star Destroyer is crazy fun. btw, skip my posts if you don't want new-canon nerdery for the next couple months. Sorry all, I've regressed to the mh of 1998.

It looks like, with the exception of showing the villains off in quick shots, the framing of the trailer is "lonely girl, thinking 'bout things on a desert planet, wishing she could get offworld," leading to her meeting the pilot of a downed TIE fighter, and then they meet Han Solo, who tells them all the rumors about how the war really shook out a few decades ago being true.

The story of the Empire most people knew, especially those away from the core worlds, was that he swept away corruption from within the Republic and instituted strong military rule to bring about a better life for those in the galaxy. The flip side of that is that a number of people knew it was on the back of slaves, suppression of free speech, and a ruthless military with weapons that could wipe out planets.

The original trilogy is a very family-based, remnants of the Jedi story that most people wouldn't know. I'd imagine outside of Luke's immediate friends and family, few people knew that he was on the second death star, let alone that Darth Vader was his father. The rebellion in the galaxy at large was the story of a group of people who believed in the vision of the Republic taking down a fascist state. Sure, there were rumors about the Emperor and Vader being creatures of the force, about the rebel alliance having a jedi on their side, but framing the entire conflict as a sith/jedi thing is the story for the moviegoers, not the viewpoint of the characters.

So Han saying that yes, these crazy rumors were true, that they had the force on their side, is pretty exciting for a kid who was born long after all these events.

μpright mammal (mh), Tuesday, 20 October 2015 14:51 (eight years ago) link

just watched the original's trailer again to see if it gave any hint of humor in it. it didn't nor any sense of plot which was kinda surprising. i can understand them revealing virtually nothing about the plot w/ the new one, i can appreciate it even. the original's trailer is definitely bigger! louder! though, plus heavy playing up of romance (they really play up the pitch 'the story of a boy, a girl, and a universe', which has generally been forgotten). there's virtually no dialogue in the original (i think threepio talks most and that's just during a 'this movie's got robots y'all' part), just a whole lot of lasers blasting and ships flying and explosions. they play up the swinging on the rope scene big, seeing the star wars trailer on tv is one of my first memories and that specifically is what gripped me, it was a really big part of the iconography at the time - incorporated into the death star toy, a callback in rotj - but it seems to have kinda faded. i posted this elsewhere but i think the thing i take most comfort in is how much isn't 'star warsy' here, the kinds of shots you never saw in the others, etc. if they're going to make god knows how many more of these i'd like directors to be able to have some fun in how they tell the story, the most disappointing thing about the marvel movies for me is how they all basically look the same.

balls, Tuesday, 20 October 2015 14:53 (eight years ago) link

There's also a strong tradition of jedi-as-monks, leading lives in exile meditating and studying to try to suss out the will of the force. Luke appears in the trailers so far, but only as a voice or in the one repeated cut of him reaching out with his robot arm to touch R2. Chances are, he's been off meditating somewhere or searching out old jedi lore in the outer rim. The books/comics seem to imply the Imperials who are clued into the force seem to think Palpatine had something hidden, something powerful, out there, too.

μpright mammal (mh), Tuesday, 20 October 2015 14:54 (eight years ago) link

btw some website seemed to imply there is an ewok cameo, probably when this Vader fanboy goes to see out his relics, lol

μpright mammal (mh), Tuesday, 20 October 2015 14:56 (eight years ago) link

Aw that's nice, I think Ewoks get a bit unfairly picked on.

the joke should be over once the kid is eaten. (chap), Tuesday, 20 October 2015 14:56 (eight years ago) link

Mark Hamill is the new Alec Guinness (good luck everyone)

skateboards are the new combover (Dr Morbius), Tuesday, 20 October 2015 14:58 (eight years ago) link

I've seen Star Wars and Empire fairly recently (within the last three years), but I honestly can't remember when I last watched Jedi. I'll probably need to brush up before the new one. Maybe what you say is true and Ewoks aren't as bad as I remember.

Ⓓⓡ. (Johnny Fever), Tuesday, 20 October 2015 14:59 (eight years ago) link

mh i don't know if you're like me and have to ruin things for yrself but have you seen that long theory that basically synthesizes all the rumours and spoilers into one plot outline. cuz it read pretty plausible in general to me (and these things definitely get out - i can remember reading something similar for phantom menace that was pretty dead on enough that i could warn ppl about jar jar and let them know that darth maul was barely in the movie), and nothing i've seen so far negates anything in it.

xp jedis as monks was so how i basically saw them as a kid and so much better than the prequels jedis as cia

balls, Tuesday, 20 October 2015 15:00 (eight years ago) link

very impressed with mh's scholarly contributions here, kiu

ogmor, Tuesday, 20 October 2015 15:00 (eight years ago) link

Love Han Solo going from "ancient weapons and hokey religions" to "the dark side, the Jedi, it's all true."

this was disorienting

The burrito of ennui (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Tuesday, 20 October 2015 15:00 (eight years ago) link

somewhat tempted to get a ticket to the marathon and then just skip the prequels

balls, Tuesday, 20 October 2015 15:01 (eight years ago) link

The Ewoks are awesome. The Luke/Leia "my sister has it" scene though...

how's life, Tuesday, 20 October 2015 15:01 (eight years ago) link

Jedi = Hollywood monks who blow up shit!

The Luke/Leia "my sister has it" scene though...

The Force is the new herpes.

skateboards are the new combover (Dr Morbius), Tuesday, 20 October 2015 15:02 (eight years ago) link

*crying tears of joy* you guys star wars is so stupid, this is going to be so bad

goole, Tuesday, 20 October 2015 15:07 (eight years ago) link

han would have to be a legit cretin if he was still totally sceptical about the force despite hanging out w/ masters for years

ogmor, Tuesday, 20 October 2015 15:08 (eight years ago) link

How much time did the original trilogy cover? Because it's that + 30 years.

Ⓓⓡ. (Johnny Fever), Tuesday, 20 October 2015 15:10 (eight years ago) link

original films take place over the course of about five years, I think

μpright mammal (mh), Tuesday, 20 October 2015 15:16 (eight years ago) link

the time span between SW and TESB is the oddest. Suddenly Solo's a general. I think the novels published since then have said as much as five to eight years?

The burrito of ennui (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Tuesday, 20 October 2015 15:17 (eight years ago) link

fwiw I don't really care about guessing the last couple acts of the new film, I am sure someone has sussed out some details about the twists, but honestly with so many people coming up with fan theories, at least one has to be close

μpright mammal (mh), Tuesday, 20 October 2015 15:18 (eight years ago) link

http://starwars.wikia.com/wiki/Timeline_of_canon_media

this is some new numbering that starts with Episode I, but it looks like Episode IV takes place 32 years in, and Empire is 35, so about three years

the rebels had a pretty small force at the beginning and saw a lot of action, and I'm not sure if it's canon anymore, but Han had military training before he bailed out to be a smuggler, so it's a stretch but not implausible

μpright mammal (mh), Tuesday, 20 October 2015 15:20 (eight years ago) link

One thing I do love in the new trailers is the use of the Falcon. One of the exciting things about the possibilities of space flight/combat is that you don't really have the same kind of directional/gravitational limits, all planes are equally open. Yet most space flight/combat is not filmed with this in mind. Something about the Falcon's shape makes it particularly fun to watch swooping around in all directions, making loops, etc., like it doesn't LOOK like something that was designed with any nods to the principles of flight within gravity. Of course the Falcon is also doing some of that swooping around within gravity, so I guess I'm just saying I like watching the falcon fly around.

on entre O.K. on sort K.O. (man alive), Tuesday, 20 October 2015 15:22 (eight years ago) link

judging by the large mane of dark hair this Kylo Ren has, I can only assume he's the son of Leia and Chewbacca

μpright mammal (mh), Tuesday, 20 October 2015 15:23 (eight years ago) link

kylo ren Halloween costumes already on sale btw. First time you'll be able to dress as a character from a movie that's not out yet?

on entre O.K. on sort K.O. (man alive), Tuesday, 20 October 2015 15:27 (eight years ago) link

how is time measured in the star wars universe anyway

Οὖτις, Tuesday, 20 October 2015 15:28 (eight years ago) link

in parsnips

on entre O.K. on sort K.O. (man alive), Tuesday, 20 October 2015 15:29 (eight years ago) link

The Galactic Standard Calendar was the standard measurement of time in the galaxy. It centered around the Coruscant solar cycle. The Coruscant solar cycle was 368 days long with a day consisting of 24 standard hours.

so uhh basically earth years

μpright mammal (mh), Tuesday, 20 October 2015 15:29 (eight years ago) link

they even fudge the physics of faster-than-light travel. somehow there's a device that keeps time on ships synchronized with the world outside

I don't want to know if anyone has written a goofy "physics of Star Wars" book, but the full text would probably be something to the effect of "we're telling a story here, ok?"

μpright mammal (mh), Tuesday, 20 October 2015 15:37 (eight years ago) link

It's set in a fictional universe where physics operate entirely differently. SW has never claimed to be hard sci-fi.

the joke should be over once the kid is eaten. (chap), Tuesday, 20 October 2015 15:39 (eight years ago) link

I was just curious about something I was sure some nerd came up with an answer for, not really concerned about scientific versimilitude or anything

Οὖτις, Tuesday, 20 October 2015 15:41 (eight years ago) link

but if star wars isn't real then all the organizing principles of my life are wrong

1999 ball boy (Karl Malone), Tuesday, 20 October 2015 15:43 (eight years ago) link

noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
(does this mean yes?)

1999 ball boy (Karl Malone), Tuesday, 20 October 2015 15:44 (eight years ago) link

yeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeees

Οὖτις, Tuesday, 20 October 2015 15:46 (eight years ago) link

adopt a strong principle of disorganization

μpright mammal (mh), Tuesday, 20 October 2015 16:43 (eight years ago) link

mh analysis a+, nice one

I also am interested in the voice talking to Ren at the beginning and end "Who are you?" "The force, it's calling to you. Just let it in." Do we know who that voice is?

I'm exciting by the possibility of these characters (Ren, Boyega) having that Skywalker discovery of something bigger than themselves, journeys to find a purpose etc. The characters were the heart of the original trilogy, and the suggestion that we may get back to some of that kind of storytelling feels good

Han's "it's real" makes me so teary, I love it.

I am excited, hopeful...I feel all the good feelings about this so far

Flamenco Drop (VegemiteGrrl), Tuesday, 20 October 2015 16:58 (eight years ago) link

Shot-by-shot breakdown for us obsessives: http://io9.com/heres-a-shot-by-shot-breakdown-of-all-the-goodies-in-th-1737486310

Resting Bushface (Phil D.), Tuesday, 20 October 2015 16:59 (eight years ago) link

1:1 we get a re-reprise of "I love you" "I know"

skateboards are the new combover (Dr Morbius), Tuesday, 20 October 2015 16:59 (eight years ago) link

The characters were the heart of the original trilogy,

they were?

Οὖτις, Tuesday, 20 October 2015 17:00 (eight years ago) link

this is news to me

Οὖτις, Tuesday, 20 October 2015 17:00 (eight years ago) link

I also am interested in the voice talking to Ren at the beginning and end "Who are you?" "The force, it's calling to you. Just let it in." Do we know who that voice is?

Think that's Lupita N'yongo.

how's life, Tuesday, 20 October 2015 17:01 (eight years ago) link


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