Star Wars 7 shit talk

But this is a trailer designed to sell the movie to folks who weren't already gunna see it anyway

this is an odd conclusion

i see Billy Dee Williams gets a lotta SW cartoon voice work.

huh, for some reason I'd assumed his lines were done by a soundalike

they did get James Earl Jones in for some lines in the newest season of the cartoon, which is a coup on their part

Adam Driver is forever gonna be adam from girls in my mind and i am looking forward to him glaring at whoever and doing the whole "YOU KNOW NOTHING OF THE DARK SIDE JON SNOW" bit all brooklyn hipster style

just don't ever use "A New Hope" in front of me.

Adam Driver is playing an earthbound 17th-century Jesuit Jedi in the new Scorsese

RLM's trailer reaction video is very good.

i like this
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H1pn4bTAQWA

I also am interested in the voice talking to Ren at the beginning and end "Who are you?" "The force, it's calling to you. Just let it in." Do we know who that voice is?

It's Disney telling you to open your wallets. You know you want to see this movie anyways, just let it happen.

honestly Lucas should have done this after Empire. we would be on the 2nd reboot of the entire franchise by now.

man there are a lot of characters in this movie, huh? i mean there are enough new actors to fill equivalents to all the roles in the original trilogy... plus the actors from that trilogy as well. seems like it'd be overstuffed along the lines of a lot of contemporary franchise films. i predict lots of manic cross-cutting.

as long as they give Ello Asty a proper arc

those old-timey serial wipes better be doubletime

they could alternate left- and right-wipes, and then parody the fast-paced nature mid film by doing both at the same time and meeting in the middle

the wipes in the trailer really bothered me actually, they don't really achieve an "old-timey" effect for me and look power-pointish

is Lobot in this

finally the only question that matters

Best part of that RLM bit was the background chatter where they are trying to identify the character based on the ... feminine garb? And then one guys says "you know, there might be more than one girl in this movie." And the other guy goes "well, it is Star Wars."

Lobot is in that Lando comic series

it is sad, though

don't cry, Lobot!

http://media1.giphy.com/media/5SEx3MCeW2gTu/giphy.gif

http://vignette2.wikia.nocookie.net/starwars/images/8/81/BlackFleetCrisis.jpg/revision/latest?cb=20070706100117

one of the many cool things about Kershner's direction of TESB: no explanations. Here's a weird bald mute dude wearing headphones who sleeps standing up and awakens suddenly when someone calls. Maybe it was a cool New Wave tune idk

http://vignette4.wikia.nocookie.net/starwars/images/7/70/Lobot_TCG_by_Barger.jpg/revision/latest?cb=20131007195732

big Gary Numan fan iirc

collect em all

http://theswca.com/db/stephane/lobot_mecc_esb.jpg

http://theconcourse.deadspin.com/what-if-the-new-star-wars-sucks-too-1737539377

this is a pretty on point article.

those dr dre headphones are a real eye opener for sure imo

I used Lobot often during the eighties, often as fleet commander/human collaborator with Transformers, Thundercats, etc.

Best part of that RLM bit was the background chatter where they are trying to identify the character based on the ... feminine garb? And then one guys says "you know, there might be more than one girl in this movie." And the other guy goes "well, it is Star Wars."

― Josh in Chicago, Tuesday, October 20, 2015 4:18 PM (16 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

The original trilogy is kind of fueled by a subtext of everyone sexually competing for Leia -- Luke, Han, Vader, Jabba, Lando, even the Storm Troopers.

were you a teenage lobotomy?

xpost

and three of the worst major motion pictures ever made.

oh come on

Identical all-white drones, more like Sperm Troopers amirite?

that part is probably overstated since ROTS is legit solid for the most part, but i also remember the rictus grin i wore at the end of phantom menace and for most of AOTC

Further symbolisim in the x-wings running down a shaft in order to penetrate a giant egg. I could really run with this.

ROTJ is inert for reasons that have nothing to do with Ewoks.

my favorite part of Jedi is when obi-wan's ghost sits down on a log

Alec Guinness, exhausted by the doggerel.

I've a childhood memory of three quarters of the audience bursting out laughing when Obi-Wan gives Luke his "what I told you was true...from a certain point of view" and Luke says A CERTAIN POINT OF VIIIEW?

lol

Also, the Leia-as-sister thing is a fatal mistake, too; it forces us to understand both Vader and Obi-Wan as complete idiots. Vader stood face-to-face with his own daughter at multiple junctures of the first film and never once noticed a resemblance to himself or his dead wife—the woman with whom, according to the prequel trilogy, he’d been in love since he was eight years old? He never once detected that the Force was strong with this one? A random astromech droid shows up at Obi-Wan’s hut in the company of Darth Vader’s secret son, spits out a video recording of that son’s secret sister, and Obi-Wan doesn’t even blanch or bat an eyelash at this? Doesn’t even notice that Darth Vader’s secret son clearly has the hots for his own fucking sister? These people are fucking morons!)

Trailer doesn't reveal if they're bringing back Ice Cream Maker Guy.

http://threads.rebelscum.com/photogallery/data//1451/willrow3.jpg

Incest is more or less acceptable in the star wars universe

the thing with beating up on jedi is, yeah, it's not as good as empire but to move it down to the level of the prequels is basically like saying "i have never seen any other movies." specifically any other 80s fantasy or sci-fi adventure type movies. it towers above all of them, at the very least by virtue of the craft of an enormous design/effects team running basically round the clock and pulling out every trick in their toolbelts. okay, it's not blade runner, and it's not raiders of the lost ark... but everything else you could plausibly pitch it against, i think it comes out looking really good. it's not super focused and lucas/marquand (but seemingly mainly lucas) don't really have any big new ideas - hence such bad moves as "another death star" (but damn, that space battle, lando's big bombing run) and "leia's your sister" (i don't really care about this but sure, yeah, it creates pointless plot holes)... but it's fine, it's all fine, and in its best moments it produces star wars ~feelings~.

so even though we all agree the ewoks aren't so good now, it seems clear to me that if the new movie were as good as return of the jedi, that would be basically the rousing best-case scenario, return to classic old-school filmmaking etc. etc. nobody is seriously imagining something as good as empire being made in 2015; that unique mix of 70s hollywood and special-effects super-adventure is not coming back. the main thing it has to achieve is not just feeling like a disposable 2010s remake where everybody either immediately forgets it happened (like new total recall, new robocop) or hates it forever (like... the star wars prequels). getting past that point is the bare minimum for this to not feel so empty and hollow that it's as damaging to our impressions of the franchise as the prequels. somewhere between that minimum, and the "feels of a piece with return of the jedi" point could be about what i was hoping the prequels would be, back in 1997/98.

who knows? it's not impossible even with the bajillions of dollars sloshing around that it could be decent, good, or even very good. they'll never be necessary but the integrity-of-the-series ship already sailed with the prequels, so like i said when these new movies first got announced, the worst case scenario is actually a good one: a glut of bad latter-day star wars movies de-centers the prequels and detaches everything post-Jedi as "the later ones" that you really obviously don't have to watch to experience star wars. it'll be like the Oz books or the Boxcar Children, or direct-to-video sequels to kids' animated movies. the more Land Before Times there are (13, with #14 coming next year), the more clearly the first one comes into focus as the only Land Before Time.

rotj does not "tower" over conan the barbarian or the road warrior

Casino

https://media.giphy.com/media/ehnBGPgDOusUM/giphy.gif

so even though we all agree the ewoks aren't so good now,

No. We don't! The biggest problems are pace and editing, which are the same problem. Thanks to the decision to hurry through basic plot points, none of the characters interact. Lando and Han? "Good luck -- you're gonna need it!" Leia and Han? "I love you. I know," pt. 2. The Vader-Luke scenes are awful, the Luke-Palpatine atrocious ("Soon I'll be dead. And you with me" -- huh?).

okay i did forget the road warrior. conan, i dunno. it's good though. maybe "towers" is a bit much. it's definitely better than return to oz and the neverending story... though there's a lot good in both, especially in terms of the creepiness of the first and the sheer bleakness of the latter, which petersen clearly got from empire and from which jedi could have taken some cues. it's WAY better than labyrinth, "towers" is fair there. haven't seen dark crystal. it's better than dune, even if the design work and a few performances in that could have really helped it out.

https://instagram.com/p/9DN_LbsCtp/
okay, i like this guy

it seems clear to me that if the new movie were as good as return of the jedi, that would be basically the rousing best-case scenario, return to classic old-school filmmaking etc. etc.

ROTJ is garbage school filmmaking. The first Star Wars is classic whatever.