Star Wars 7 shit talk

Shit, I thought the South Park movie came out first. 1999 was a blur of university and college radio and hype for me.

We learn nothing that doesn't immediately pertain to the plot device at hand.

not to overly defend the prequels cuz they really do suck, but the seed that sidious plants in anakin with the plagueis story ultimately leads him into turning to the dark side

they don't even know how to tell the story they are telling, it's an impressively layered kind of frustrating badness

Darth Vader couldn't find anyone who wanted to be his apprentice at Sith Academy so he roamed half the galaxy just to see if Luke would do it

Midichlorians? In my youngling?

― I Was Picking Up A Teaspoon When Something Happened To My Spine (Old Lunch), Thursday, October 22, 2015 10:55 AM (12 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Hey, you got youngling in my midichlorians!

the seed that sidious plants in anakin with the plagueis story ultimately leads him into turning to the dark side

well they could have maybe planted that seed sometime before halfway into the final movie of the trilogy. it "ultimately" leads him to the dark side in the next scene, more or less

they don't even know how to tell the story they are telling, it's an impressively layered kind of frustrating badness

― goole,

basically a thousand years of Sith history become bad Palpatine pickup lines that wouldn't get him a free vodka soda at a gay bar

Sidious was dying to plant his seed

one of the things that can still make feel good about lucas is that he based chewbacca on his dog (who was of course named indiana).

"You are named after THE DOG?!"

had a lot of good times with that dog

the seed that sidious plants in anakin with the plagueis story ultimately leads him into turning to the dark side

well they could have maybe planted that seed sometime before halfway into the final movie of the trilogy. it "ultimately" leads him to the dark side in the next scene, more or less

They did. In the second movie. After Anakin's mother dies and he tells Padme, "Some day, I will be the most powerful Jedi ever. I will even be able to stop people from dying."

People can like or not like whatever, but you can't criticize movies for doing things you don't remember them doing.

eventually, maybe w/ the next one, i will name a dog indiana that way when ppl ask me my dog's name i can go into connery voice and respond "we named the dog indiana"

I mean you can argue the execution and direction were shitty and what have you, but it's not like Lucas made no effort whatsoever to develop the idea. Even back in Phantom Menace the whole thing about Anakin was, "He wants to help people, he gives without thought of reward," etc.

lol "someday i will be the most powerful jedi ever. i will even be able to stop sand."

ok couldn't remember if that was in the 2nd or 3rd movie. what a lame character arc

God, those Anakin lines still seem so petulant even in writing. I kinda want to rewatch the last two prequels just to imagine that they're movies about Stephen Glass in space.

i don't doubt that on paper perhaps it is a tragic story but the way he portrayed it, there was no art to it

did they establish his dislike of sand in the first one, like greedo kid is like "annie there's a problem w/ yr pod alternator...yup, as i suspected - sand" and it's like oooh foreshadowing - top that david simon!

"I really like dictatorships....... j/k!"

http://www-personal.umich.edu/~kathyb/haydenc/images/anakin_padme_507.jpg

xpost Opera house sith dump was in the third movie after all.

I know we're talking about a Star Wars movie, but McDiarmid's best bits are in the opera sequence.

Who even knew he had a voice like that.

lol

McDiarmid in the opera scene is probably the most defensible piece of the entire prequel trilogy, and they put all the good lines from it in the trailer, so really you can save yourself nearly seven hours of viewing time if you just watch that.

I kinda want to rewatch the last two prequels just to imagine that they're movies about Stephen Glass in space.

― I Was Picking Up A Teaspoon When Something Happened To My Spine (Old Lunch), Thursday, October 22, 2015 3:25 PM (17 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

this is such a good idea

"Master...did I do something wrong? Are you mad at me?"

I don't remember an opera sequence. What's this?

My main problem w the prequels was we should have seen Anakin's family, his real dad and mom, maybe his birth has comic force circumstances around it, etc. Also he was supposed to be "the best starfighter pilot in the galaxy" but he is more a chaperon and security detail in the prequels. Let's see him as a pilot for the Empire, one who is being sent to crazy space battles against extremist rebels on desolate hellscape planets in the far reaches. Let's see him have twisted force visions that make him question his sanity, and confront his superiors at the front lines. Maybe he slowly becomes bionic from war injuries and has PTSD.

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HLfGh2b_me0

They actually have Yoda say:

Yoda: Not if anything to say about it I have!

XP go get the Genndy Tartakovsy cartoons then! http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B0006Z2LMO
http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B000BCE8Q4

Also 10x as good at actually establishing General Grevious as a bad-ass than the films.

Feel like the Jedis being all nonchalant about the CLONE ARMY drastically slashes away at their integrity. They are supposed to be in tune with all living energy and yet they are totally cool with these clones living only as canon fodder.

lol @ canon fodder

i wish i could pray hard enough to release everyone from thinking about that kind of shit forever

if only you had more midichlorians

The opening credit sequence has leaked

Yeah, you'd think that a movie about militarized clones would touch on the ethics of cloning at least once.

Especially as ethics are a clearly defined line that the main character crosses and is the supposed crux of the entire series.

i dont know its either this or politics and those people make even less sense

man that opening credits sequence has me stoked

it's like JJ Abrams cracked the code that made the prequels so shitty

Luke Skywalker: No, my father didn't fight in the Clone Wars. He was a navigator on a spice freighter.
Ben Obi-Wan Kenobi: That's what your uncle told you. He didn't hold with your father's ideals; he felt he should've stayed here and not gotten involved.
Luke Skywalker: You fought in the Clone Wars?
Ben Obi-Wan Kenobi: Yes. I was once a Jedi knight, the same as your father.
Luke Skywalker: I wish I'd known him.
Ben Obi-Wan Kenobi: He was the best star pilot in the galaxy, and a cunning warrior. I understand that you've become quite a good pilot yourself.
[sorrowfully]
Ben Obi-Wan Kenobi: And he was a good friend.

this is all you needed, you didn't need those three stupid movies. if you had to make them, yes, show him actually doing something other than being a suitor and then having a couple tantrums. also i think lucas focusing on the rise of the sith as an opponent from within was a disastrous decision, like i agree about wanting to see these epic space battles in distant star systems and the entire time it should have been the same two sides. the empire should have always been there as an enemy, maybe an unknown known or whatever, and there's this amazing war between two equally matched opponents that eventually is a victory for the empire because the emperor converts anakin in a way that isn't this high school play Iago shit.

we all know the prequels (and ROTJ) were shitty, this is the thread for how shitty Star Wars 7 will be

tears don't really express fear btw fyi

― Sabato Gigante (benbbag), Wednesday, October 21, 2015 11:23 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

shout. shout. let it all out.

Lando Rabinowicz
― Don't Call Me A Lunkhead, You Dingbat! (Old Lunch)

it is a thinly veiled "Polish Joke" and you are 80 years old?

Oy, you got me.

Even back in Phantom Menace the whole thing about Anakin was, "He wants to help people, he gives without thought of reward," etc.

― Resting Bushface (Phil D.), Thursday, October 22, 2015 4:22 PM (6 hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

except when he is slaughtering an innocent village of creatures at least