Star Wars 7 shit talk

I would love to see the Werner Herzog take on Lucasian universe/franchise-building

Kind of like how I will go to my grave wondering what it would be like if Wesley Willis joined the post-Onanie Bomb Boredoms

Oh wait the answer to the first idea is the WORLD WE LIVE IN NOW
I'm slow

Herzog film needs Siamese Hutt Twins

Notorious smuggler, Fitt Zcarreedo

And what haunts me, is that in all the faces of all the wampas that Probe 11-38 ever detected, I discover no kinship, no understanding, no mercy. I see only the overwhelming indifference of Hoth. To me, there is no such thing as a secret world of the wampas. And this blank stare speaks only of a half-bored interest in food. But for Probe 11-38, this wampa was a signal, a reason for being.

Boort Floss, Probe Wrangler:

My opinion, I think 11-38 thought these wampas were big, scary looking, harmless creatures that it could go up and scan and beep at, and they would bond as children of the universe or some-odd. I think it lost sight of what was really going on.

Little Dameron Needs to Fly

Even Ewoks Started Small

i wish people did this kind of speculation when there was, say, a new frederick wiseman film
"they are TOTALLY gonna show a christening in this one"

― a llove spat over a llama-keeper (forksclovetofu), Tuesday, November 10, 2015 10:24 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

lol. which american institution will he tackle next?

bait shop

DMV

motivational seminar

pest control

organic farm

If the only black main character in the new film is related to the only black character in the other films I am going to leave this shit behind

― μpright mammal (mh), Tuesday, November 10, 2015 8:05 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

"What am I, her royal highness's chopped liver?"

http://usercontent2.hubimg.com/6742229_f260.jpg

If Rey's not a Skywalker I'll eat my Fett

― El Tomboto, Tuesday, November 10, 2015 8:59 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Based on the fact that they're letting Daisy Ridley use her natural speaking voice and not having her adopt an American accent (unlike Boyega), my current speculation based on everything so far released is:

- She's Luke's daughter
- She's never met her father
- Her mother is someone we've never met and won't meet in this movie
- Luke will not show up in this movie until the final reel

We're never told Yoda is male, and he's got the same voice as Miss Piggy, who we know (per the above) had a thing for Luke, so I posit that Rey is the child of Luke and Yoda and that is why he wears a mask.

Yeah, would be Yodo if a male.

YODO

#YODO

will John Williams work in the Imperial March even tho there is no Empire, Y or N

b-b-b-but what about Yaddle?

http://vignette1.wikia.nocookie.net/starwars/images/3/3e/Yaddle-SWE.jpg/revision/latest?cb=20120204065352

xp just as kylo ren's ringtone

Some new photos at EW: http://www.ew.com/gallery/star-wars-force-awakens-exclusive-photos

and a nice Ford interview

http://www.ew.com/article/2015/11/11/harrison-ford-is-han-solo

So RLM looks to be right, Han and Chewie are a couple of pedestrian hobos at this point? ref interview comment about how Han's still no good with money, and "we're home" line from that one teaser back when, implying they've not been spending much time on the Falcon.

it's actually the moment after they dock with Home One, Ackbar's ship

If multiple missions playing Xwing/Tie Fighter are any indication, Home One was blown away long ago by an errant pilot who got bored on a mission and decided to see how many hits it would take to destroy certain critical hard points on an Alliance capital ship.

EW talks to Lupita Nyongo about her character, which apparently appears on the movie poster:

http://www.ew.com/article/2015/11/12/star-wars-force-awakens-lupita-nyongo-maz-kanata

a thousand years old, finally a character who knows things

Star Wars got the Pai Mei it needed

I dig how Andy Serkis is getting a double paycheck as both onscreen actor and mocap advisor

He should just wear a mocap suit 24/7 and spend his life walking funny and contorting himself, just to build a licenseable archive. When they get around to making that movie about a CGI creature that sleeps all the time, he'll be printing money.

http://hdmoviespoint.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/04/Garfeild-2004-Full-Movie-Dual-Audio-HD-Free-Download.jpg

Pah. Manga wanjee kohkpah Peecha wahnjee kohkpa tahng nahngee toochantkee lasagna.

Per that great Red Letter Media prediction episode, what exactly does the Empire do with its power besides build Death Stars? They're kind of a one-trick pony, aren't they? Conquering worlds to get resources to build Death Stars to conquer worlds to get resources to build Death Stars to ... It's like a Spacemen 3 album title.

lol thats another thing the prequels could have looked into. maybe it ultimately is about taxation and trade deals.

Power grows out of the barrel of a death star

Episode 9 will end with a Death Star on Death Star superlaser duel.

"So this is how liberty dies, with thunderous applause."

btw congrats to General Leia Organa. That's a nice promotion for someone who went through the first movie showing the irritation commensurate with finding the nail salon closed.

well, she was a politician, but still a kid, really

her brother's biggest ambition was to maybe get off his world, someday, but mostly hang out at the convenience store with his friends while pretending to run an errand for power converters

well he's an American Graffiti character gone galactic

someone who went through the first movie showing the irritation commensurate with finding the nail salon closed.

LOL yeah chicks right?

They give a sensible rationale in ANH in the officers meeting, which actually is a neat scene that I don't think we get another one of quality(not counting the prequels' shitty attempts).

http://static.fosketts.net/wp-content/uploads/2015/01/Grand-Moff-Tarkin-500x283.jpg

"Fear will keep the local systems in line. Fear of this battle station."

This scene is also where he mentions how the Imperial Senate has been dissolved by the Emperor, and now regional governors have direct control over their respective territories.

So, yeah, mobile doomsday weapon to backstop an authoritarian power-grab.

And *of course* Wookieepedia has a write-up for it:

http://starwars.wikia.com/wiki/Tarkin_Doctrine

tbf tarkin never used that phrase, it was coined by charles krauthammer

i like Carrie Fisher, GOTT (moreso when she learned to act a little), but that character as a future general is mighty funny.

also fuck PC bullshit as always

the new poster for her is cool

lol lens flare tho

One of the few times that John Simon makes me laugh intentionally is when he calls Leia an Organic Lay.

lol dlh

https://vine.co/v/iBjTMbD0Ej2

More pics leaking:

http://www.collector-actionfigures.com/static/media/uploads/blog/.thumbnails/worststarwarsbootlegsfeatured-630x0.jpg

http://www.blastr.com/sites/blastr/files/styles/blog_post_media/public/images/BootlegCoversLead.jpg

god that is such a better version of phantom menace

Can't help feeling like John Boyega's dialect coach taught him to talk in Eddie Murphy's "white man" voice:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E7bh-H9ZfLQ