Star Wars 7 shit talk

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lol, his friend is named Dr. Cornelius Evazan

http://www.jeditemplearchives.com/galleries/2012/Review_DrEvazanTVC/Review_DrEvazanTVC_still.JPG

jmm, Wednesday, 16 December 2015 02:15 (eight years ago) link

A doctor with the death sentence on 12 systems

kevin smith what a bro (Myonga Vön Bontee), Wednesday, 16 December 2015 02:35 (eight years ago) link

gawd, I had a guy who i lived with in college who would walk up to people in bars and say HE DOESN'T LIKE YOU... I DON'T LIKE YOU EITHER

Does that make you mutter, under your breath, “Damn”? (forksclovetofu), Wednesday, 16 December 2015 03:53 (eight years ago) link

u_u

Flamenco Drop (VegemiteGrrl), Wednesday, 16 December 2015 04:02 (eight years ago) link

i prefer the names Richard Pryor calls them in his bar sketch

skateboards are the new combover (Dr Morbius), Wednesday, 16 December 2015 06:24 (eight years ago) link

Not sure if this has been mentioned but there are some other versions around now, some enthusiasts have been buying up original prints, digitising the best reels with a 4k scanner and then going through and cleaning up dirt:

http://originaltrilogy.com/topic/team-negative1-star-wars-1977-35mm-theatrical-version-release-details-and-updates/id/14590/page/1
http://originaltrilogy.com/topic/Team-Negative1-The-Empire-Strikes-Back-1980-35mm-Theatrical-Version-Release-Details-and-Updates/id/16108/page/1

Chewshabadoo, Wednesday, 16 December 2015 10:23 (eight years ago) link

Hate how good cinemas in London are screening this over the weekend just to get punters in.

xyzzzz__, Wednesday, 16 December 2015 11:05 (eight years ago) link

Bastards.

xyzzzz__, Wednesday, 16 December 2015 11:08 (eight years ago) link

Production photo shows they originally had something more hardcore in mind:

In the novelization, not only does Obi-Wan decapitate and, uh, de-arm-itate Walrus Man; he bisects Dr. Evazan from top to bottom. That may have been a little much for a PG movie in 1977.

Resting Bushface (Phil D.), Wednesday, 16 December 2015 13:08 (eight years ago) link

I always thought Alec Guinness voiced, uh, Dr. Evazan. It sounds like one of his imitations.

The burrito of ennui (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Wednesday, 16 December 2015 13:09 (eight years ago) link

Star Wars: The Force Awakens is no more and no less than the movie that made us love it in the first place. In fact, it's basically the same thing. Isn't that what we all wanted anyway?

No. No, it isn't. Is that supposed to be a point in its favor?

My biggest apprehension about this is that it winds up being more of a nostalgic look back at why people love the original films rather than a thing that stands and earns love on its own terms. Something like The Muppets, which is more about the creator's fond memories than it is about moving on to the next chapter. Nostalgia. Legacy. Blechh.

Some Pizza Grudge From Twenty Years Ago (Old Lunch), Wednesday, 16 December 2015 13:22 (eight years ago) link

I clearly have no issue with nostalgia on its own terms but fan service is kind of the worst. I don't need the Chris Farley Show retrospective.

Some Pizza Grudge From Twenty Years Ago (Old Lunch), Wednesday, 16 December 2015 13:28 (eight years ago) link

Apparently the reaction is relentless, which was NOT the case in '77... and why I hate mersh action movies now.

skateboards are the new combover (Dr Morbius), Wednesday, 16 December 2015 13:31 (eight years ago) link

did you mean action?

Drop soap, not bombs (Ste), Wednesday, 16 December 2015 13:36 (eight years ago) link

yes, f u

skateboards are the new combover (Dr Morbius), Wednesday, 16 December 2015 13:37 (eight years ago) link

:D

Drop soap, not bombs (Ste), Wednesday, 16 December 2015 13:38 (eight years ago) link

I'm not interested in reading what other people think of the movie, I'm interested in what *I* think of it.

Resting Bushface (Phil D.), Wednesday, 16 December 2015 13:40 (eight years ago) link

its jj abrams. he is crippled by both his own personal reverence of his childhood favourites (see star trek) and studios that no doubt do not want anyone messing around with a winning brand/franchise. i dont expect this to be anything more than satisfying on account of it simply not being a total diaster. i dont think his aim was to really come up with anything that pointed the way forward, just to make sure he gets the series back on track. but his films have never struck me as being particularly ambitious or having anything new to add to their histories, they are more just legacy place holders/extenders.

StillAdvance, Wednesday, 16 December 2015 13:41 (eight years ago) link

I remember almost nothing about any Abrams movie I've seen. Beastie Boys songs in the far future. That, I remember.

Some Pizza Grudge From Twenty Years Ago (Old Lunch), Wednesday, 16 December 2015 13:52 (eight years ago) link

I feel like L'il Kirk listening to "Sabotage" four centuries from now was kinda the culmination of that Futurama joke where Leela refers to Sir Mix-A-Lot as "classical music."

Resting Bushface (Phil D.), Wednesday, 16 December 2015 13:59 (eight years ago) link

tbh i dont even know if he was/is a star trek fan, but it all feels like someone with no real ideas of their own, but having faith that affection for the source material, good craft, and general care (cos thats what 80s movies had right) is enough. he makes me think of what (spielberg fan) dawson in dawsons creek would make if he got a job in hollywood. hes like someone who takes on board every idea offered on fan forums, for fear of offending those guys.

StillAdvance, Wednesday, 16 December 2015 14:02 (eight years ago) link

The forgotten/forgettable Super 8 was the perfect encapsulation of everything good(ish) about Abrams and everything terrible, general competence and a sort of appealing reverence for the heyday of mainstream Spielberg kid sic-fi and a complete lack of the instincts and conviction needed to pull the nostalgia trip off.

I'm seeing this with my kids ASAP, because that is what it is there for.

Josh in Chicago, Wednesday, 16 December 2015 14:25 (eight years ago) link

The AV Club review makes it sound like exactly the movie I was expecting.

the naive cockney chorus (Simon H.), Wednesday, 16 December 2015 14:49 (eight years ago) link

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZTLAx3VDX7g

Resting Bushface (Phil D.), Wednesday, 16 December 2015 14:57 (eight years ago) link

xpost I respect that review for keeping the plot clouded while still being pretty thorough about pros and cons. Don't think I need to read any more reviews, since they'll likely give away what few surprises this apparently holds.

Josh in Chicago, Wednesday, 16 December 2015 15:00 (eight years ago) link

Man, is Fallon anything but him and celebrities goofing around?

Josh in Chicago, Wednesday, 16 December 2015 15:01 (eight years ago) link

Oh good, Fallon likes Star Wars.

jmm, Wednesday, 16 December 2015 15:06 (eight years ago) link

Doesn't Fallon like literally everything?

Some Pizza Grudge From Twenty Years Ago (Old Lunch), Wednesday, 16 December 2015 15:07 (eight years ago) link

alcohol most of all, iirc

μpright mammal (mh), Wednesday, 16 December 2015 15:13 (eight years ago) link

Best thing I've read about this movie: Candyass Fallon asking H Ford if he got sentimental playing Han again; the reply: "No, I got paid."

skateboards are the new combover (Dr Morbius), Wednesday, 16 December 2015 15:25 (eight years ago) link

Is Candyass Fallon something real or just a morbsism?

In other news, my kid just got sent home from school throwing up, so we might not be going to opening night after all.

how's life, Wednesday, 16 December 2015 15:32 (eight years ago) link

Most people only start throwing up after they've seen the new Star Wars movie. </morbs>

Sorry to hear about your kid. That's a sucky double whammy.

Some Pizza Grudge From Twenty Years Ago (Old Lunch), Wednesday, 16 December 2015 15:36 (eight years ago) link

the reply: "No, I got paid."

Rather Han Solo-like answer

jmm, Wednesday, 16 December 2015 15:38 (eight years ago) link

but who shot first?

The burrito of ennui (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Wednesday, 16 December 2015 15:41 (eight years ago) link

My local critic

The burrito of ennui (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Wednesday, 16 December 2015 15:52 (eight years ago) link

I'm only throwing up my old lunch. /kisses

I might actually see this in 2D at a bargain matinee while I'm on staycation, so there.

skateboards are the new combover (Dr Morbius), Wednesday, 16 December 2015 15:57 (eight years ago) link

Is Candyass Fallon something real or just a morbsism?

it is the natural state of Fallon. the "Candyass" is generally implied.

AdamVania (Adam Bruneau), Wednesday, 16 December 2015 16:04 (eight years ago) link

He's so "nice" he makes Leno look like Lewis Black.

Resting Bushface (Phil D.), Wednesday, 16 December 2015 16:06 (eight years ago) link

He's so not funny, he makes Leno seem funny.

Josh in Chicago, Wednesday, 16 December 2015 16:23 (eight years ago) link

he's such a corporate tool he makes Leno look like Bakunin

AdamVania (Adam Bruneau), Wednesday, 16 December 2015 16:26 (eight years ago) link

Leno was always a dickhead to guests, never seemed to care what they said

μpright mammal (mh), Wednesday, 16 December 2015 16:26 (eight years ago) link

"liking cars" perhaps the lamest rich person attribute as well

Sufjan Grafton, Wednesday, 16 December 2015 17:00 (eight years ago) link

The Force Awakens is effectively a remake of the first Star Wars, a smooth repurposing and reconfiguring of some very familiar beats rather than a whole new direction. This is what J.J. Abrams does: rather than coming up with his own material, he takes a sturdy foundation (Star Trek, Mission: Impossible, the Amblin Films corpus) and, like Lord-Miller with a (mostly) straight face, reworks it a bit. He’s not the guy who designs the car, he’s the mechanic who tinkers with the engine for a little while and makes it run eight miles faster. This might not be such a big deal if more people were competent at delivering spatially coherent, reasonably exciting action franchise installments, but there aren’t, so I’m all for it: these trains are going to run anyway, so they might as well run on time. In a friend’s post-screening words, Abrams’ task was to “unfuck” the franchise, and he’s done precisely that.

http://filmmakermagazine.com/96689-a-spoiler-free-review-of-star-wars-episode-vii-the-force-awakens-a-film-by-j-j-abrams/

skateboards are the new combover (Dr Morbius), Wednesday, 16 December 2015 17:00 (eight years ago) link

like Lord-Miller with a (mostly) straight face,

abrams is never gonna make a movie as genuinely unhinged and delightful as cloudy with a chance of meatballs, c'mon

hand of jehuty and the blowfish (bizarro gazzara), Wednesday, 16 December 2015 17:07 (eight years ago) link

Abrams’ task was to “unfuck” the franchise, and he’s done precisely that.

Put that on the poster.

Josh in Chicago, Wednesday, 16 December 2015 17:30 (eight years ago) link

nice to see the general consensus on abrams is a fair one

StillAdvance, Wednesday, 16 December 2015 17:43 (eight years ago) link

Star Wars: Unfucked

Does that make you mutter, under your breath, “Damn”? (forksclovetofu), Wednesday, 16 December 2015 17:44 (eight years ago) link

A New Fuck

Does that make you mutter, under your breath, “Damn”? (forksclovetofu), Wednesday, 16 December 2015 17:44 (eight years ago) link

Darth Fucker

Does that make you mutter, under your breath, “Damn”? (forksclovetofu), Wednesday, 16 December 2015 17:44 (eight years ago) link


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