Star Wars 7 shit talk

Anthony Lane, clumsy.

It is not for that reason, however, that I salute your courage in going to see “The Force Awakens.” Something more urgent than metaphysics is at issue, namely this: paying to watch a new “Star Wars” movie, in the wake of its predecessors—“The Phantom Menace,” “Attack of the Clones,” and “Revenge of the Sith”—is like returning to a restaurant that gave you severe food poisoning on your last three visits. So, be of good cheer. “The Force Awakens” will neither nourish nor sate, but it is palatable and fresh, and it won’t lay you low for days to come. Worshippers of the older films will have every right to feel cosseted and spoiled, as random exclamations—“Weapon fully charged in thirty seconds!”, “It’ll take a miracle to save us now!”, “Let’s hit that oscillator with everything we’ve got!”—echo through the cinema like the barks of excited dogs. Heretics and infidels, like myself, will be gratified to have avoided a more parlous fate. Please forgive us if we snort into our sodas when Han Solo remarks, “The Dark Side, the Jedi—it’s true. All of it.” Actually, Han, it’s not. It’s baloney. But it’s fun to behold, for now. And how long is it until the next chunk, a spin-off titled “Rogue One: A Star Wars Story,” crash-lands at a movie theatre near you? One year. The Force is with us forever, whether we like it or not.

he's gotten glibber by the year imo, that graf about the force is very bad.

and he acts like he isn't the 800000th person to opine that Guinness and Ford "save" the original.

https://scontent-atl3-1.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-xap1/t31.0-8/1039752_1216329381716741_1090114836741052215_o.jpg

I rewatched A New Hope yesterday. Force Awakens is better

I watched it this morning directly before Force Awakens and nah

^^^ Number None otm

I thinkw e can all agree that Force Awakens, Empire, and New Hope are the three keepers of the 7 movies so far.

and Ewoks: Battle for Endor

anyway, this was the most satisfying movie I've seen in quite a long time.

Hmmm. I still think the trench run from ANH is one of the most amazing chase sequences ever put to film. Top five easy, top three or two quite possibly. TFA didn't have that going for it but it's still a great movie

The trench fight in Hope didn't hold up to my memory of it at all

the scene where it goes from cockpit to cockpit "red five standing by" "gold leader standing by" is my fav suspense-ratcheting scene of all time

"seat-dampening delirium"
Anthony Lane reads ILX

THEY CAME FROM BEHIND

it's called STAR WARS btw

Saw it this morning, here is my review

:D

It's hard to compete with William Hootkins as one of the original pilots

this was fine but not as great as i was hoping based on the reaction of others

https://www.instagram.com/p/_cpEPEHEz1/?taken-by=msichicago

It's hard to compete with William Hootkins as one of the original pilots

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_pi1PVw792M

so $238 M weekend gross in N America est'd

seems low

gotta wait for the nerds to liquidate their kids' college funds so they can see it again

this was fine but not as great as i was hoping based on the reaction of others

also known as Fallout 4 syndrome iirc

wonder how many seats had to be disinfected for semen stains on opening night

the scene where it goes from cockpit to cockpit "red five standing by" "gold leader standing by" is my fav suspense-ratcheting scene of all time

― ogmor, Saturday, December 19, 2015 3:15 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark

truth

Lost Tyree lost Dutch... they came from behind...

saw this yesterday, had a lot of fun

daisy ridley is the best thing to happen to star wars since 1980

Did u forget Squid Head

Sorry: Tessek the Quarren

What the "remix" reviews are missing, for me, is the overwhelming (in every sense of the world) sensation I got that this world had kept on existing just as it was since 1983, with the characters living on, messing their lives up, time passing just as in the real world, and only now did we somehow manage to find our way back to it, a return to neverland, more or less, tinged with the pathos of loss, of having grown up in the meantime, and yet it was there all along. We just didn't have access to it. It's a different kind of enchantment from the first trilogy precisely because it builds on that feeling of time and a world lost, but it does remember the importance of enchantment and captures it correctly.

Great post.

Feel the same way with Crystal Skull?

I rewatched Crystal Skull over the Thanksgiving holiday and it was decent! It has more jokes related to historical setting than the other Indiana Jones films (atomic bomb test, Grease-style diner fight) and the end is more of an effects-laden send-off, but there are some really good set pieces when they're springing traps and navigating ruins.

John Hurt and Karen Allen are great, Shia LaBeouf a lot less so.

Pfff, Indy's just a guy, this is a whole world. [CENSORED} - still, that felt like some genuine, unfakeable emotion.

Sorry for spoiler leakage.

Yeah, come on, dude. There's a whole other thread.

Having trouble containing my excitement :(

hehe

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/CWye0lkWoAAd_0x.jpg

It's just fair; a Stormtrooper was on Fridays cover

idgi

This is pretty great:

http://www.gq.com/story/oscar-isaac-guitar-star-wars-cover

Having trouble containing my excitement :(

seek help

Not all of us spend all day cumming on Virgin Spring VHS covers

pfffft

u don't know me

picturing Morbs swaggering in a north face puffa and skully now

Lol!

Saw it last night and thought Force Awakens was wonderful. Went in a cautious skeptic, left a total convert. It is just *so well done, so charismatic, so adept at tapping into the magic of the originals without being beholden to them. I very much look forward to the subsequent movies in the series.

It's bizarre to me how invested some of ILX's in-house film critics are in dissing a film they have not seen and will not see (see also the Chi-raq thread), which is never ever AGL.

Now off to the spoilers thread to chat some more.

also, booming posts from longneck and veg in this thread

i know yr not talkin bout meeee, stevie, but i will see this at some point. preferably for free.

i dunno if youve heard, but this film is actually running for more than 3 days! what a world.

its really good Morbs! I hope you enjoy it!