start a victory garden and ration your IRRATIONALLY ANGRY feelings, part 3

LG otm

god this thread is good for just adding layers and layers to social anxiety

like human contact is terrifying enough without having to worry if the person I'm talking to is secretly internal screaming because I didn't use enough syllables in an arbitrary ritual response

I say "sure sure" a lot - don't pick up your tics from Coen Brothers films, kids.

(Not for thank-you read-receipt though)

fairly sure someone has said "fuck off" in response to me thanking them and it still felt fine.

You ever want to see a ridiculous response to "thank you", go on an Amex webchat session.

It's like a paragraph long.

The last guy also began our convos by saying "how can I put a smile on your face today?".

Can't reveal my reply...charges still pending

My go-to responses to thank you are "sure!" and "any time!"

i just say "word"

Sometimes to your mother.

http://mentalitywod.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/05/hakuna-matata.jpg

A Faulknerian/Styronian Southern "sho" works, as does "naw, you straight, bruh."

Generally agree with LocalGarda that the intent is what matters in formulaic utterances. Which is why I don't stress over giving a reflexive "you too!" response in situations where it doesn't make sense.

Classic example is the airline ticket agent who says "Have a nice flight!" and you say "You too!" Or the movie theater cashier who says, "Enjoy the film!" and you say "You too!"

I have had overly sensitive times in my life where I did that and then wanted to die from the mortification; life is just too short.

http://problemstopower.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/02/Jamaica_No_Problem.jpg

Anyway, if someone says "thanks" but implies they are putting me out, I sometimes say "no worries." If someone says "thanks" but implies I am doing them a favor, I sometimes say "no problem." But generally, if someone says thanks, I usually just say "you're welcome."

Briefly, during the great learning experience, my kids expected me to thank them for saying thank you.

I agree that map's irritation at this is a bit, idk, irrational? Frankly I'm shocked to see it in the million post thread of ilxors writing Yelp reviews of their commute (part 3)

PRO TIP for all of you: Don't worry about the small stuff when it comes to pleasantries.

You're welcome.

Thank you.

Briefly, during the great learning experience, my kids expected me to thank them for saying thank you.

My brain does this reflexively if e.g. I'm walking somewhere and get out of someone's way and they thank me, I seem to say "thanks" before I can even stop myself

once the recipient got v. mad, assuming I was being pissy: "I already SAID thank you!"

so don't do that (but if you do, you probably can't help it)

The recipient is ill-informed - it's an unmatched "You're Welcome" that is supposed to smack them down with the holy wrath of Miss Manners.

I find myself saying "you bet" a lot in response to "thank you"; the echo clangs in my ears

the worst is the affirmative "uh huh!" in response to a thank you. like its a huge bother to even form words with yr mouth

I do this and I hate it. I've been making a point of retraining myself to say "You're welcome."

I don't say "no problem" because some waitering job or jobs forbade it for the reasons map gave. I think the reasoning is absolute malarkey, but I think "You're welcome," sounds more formal and appropriate from a waiter in a nice restaurant.

What do you say when people sneeze?

NOTHING.

Used to work with a guy who'd mumble under his breath "godblessyu" anytime someone in the office sneezed. What's the point anyway, but especially when no one can hear you?

god hears and that's what's important

"Plug your fucking germ hole."

I say "Down goes the circus"

Befindlickheit

I say gesundheit b/c when I was a young atheist I was opposed to acknowledging God in any way and the habit stuck.

I still do that despite saying stuff like "god damn" all the time.

Now I'm confused with my kid who can't say gesundheit but I don't want to acknowledge superstition, so I've mostly got him saying "achoo" when he sneezes.

i just say to the sneezer "you sneezed".

the anti-"no problem" argument makes me want to poison myself

I actually hate "you're welcome" more, it sounds sarcastic ! maybe that's an Aus thing I dunno

" I don't want to acknowledge superstition, "

Just a lil precious imo. Ppl not actually asking a deity to protect u after u sneeze etc

I'll sometimes go with, "May God bless you and keep you under His wing. Amen and amen."

people who say "everything happens for a reason"

Just a lil precious imo. Ppl not actually asking a deity to protect u after u sneeze etc

Oh yeah, absolutely, hence the cognitive dissonance as I quite frequently ask a deity I don't believe in to damn things to an eternity in hell.

Not sure how my frequent use of "jesus fucking christ" fits into this either.

Did I ever express my IA about the way that people around here pronounce compilation as "com-PIE-lay-shun"? Drives me nuts.

xp i figured. ive the same dissnonance a lot growing up in a catholic culture where every habitual utterance is a religious reference, impossible to unhardwire that shit

When people get annoyed when you ask them to repeat themselves when you're in a loud setting and can barely hear.

Im at a Walgreens where a cashier said "Bless you" to a customer who sneezed and the customer responded, "God bless the United States of America." (4th of July humor.)

(Accidentally posted this in a politics thread but thought it was funny enough to share in the right place.)

when people sneeze i just call the cops and tell them I saw a gun

People with the same Christian name as me make me IA. I'm think I'm genuinely prejudiced against them. In the pub this afternoon there were four of us out of about a dozen people. Hell is other Kevins.

word

Okay I think I am most definitely IA about this band The Baseball Project

People who use 'Christian name' when they mean first name and aren't actively Christian (even if they come from a Christian background). Maybe less irrationally angry but more irrationally confused? Obv I dunno if dowd is actively Christian or not, but that terminology always makes me do a double-take.

I mean, even if I were talking to someone whose background meant that their family name went first, I would probably use 'personal name' instead of 'Christian'. I just can't ever imagine using it. It weirds me out.

one thing really getting my goat lately is people doing that "david bowie died and the whole world has gone mad!" landfill meme. i mean there's probably a long list of awful memes and rehashed makes u think/opinions 4 u after bowie's death, but i've seen this a few times lately.

I hate studies and polls that reveal exactly what you might expect. Just made a big deal on the radio about a new study that determined, to absolutely no one's surprise, that religious and evangelical people are more likely to support Trump, and atheists and other relative non-believers are more likely to support Clinton. The poll also revealed that a lot of people support Trump because they don't like Clinton, and a lot of Clinton's support come from people who don't like Trump.

Yeah, no shit. I hope they saved some of that grant money for something more useful. It's like when they do variations of an older, definitive study and come up with similar results. "OMG, people who smoke and watch tv are more likely to get cancer than people who just watch TV!"

People who use 'Christian name' when they mean first name

i imagine most people use it unthinkingly as they do when saying "bless you".