start a victory garden and ration your IRRATIONALLY ANGRY feelings, part 3

They're going all out for business!

People who refract all their political ideas/views through Harry Potter metaphors are not grown up enough to be discussing politics

Ppl who say "so long story short" but do not summarize anything that follows so it's just a two-part long story

People who whisper on the bus. It's fucking creepy.

"Hey...wait'll you see my diiiiiiiiiiick"

Whenever a site (or an ilxor) links to some tweet all "!!!" and I end up clicking on it and waiting for the Twitter app to load and then find out it's just some more worthless snark.

The people who, the second that a thing goes out of print, sell their used copies of the thing at a 10,000% markup are parasites, and I hope all of their belongings melt into an amorphous lump of slag.

they might list it at 10,000% markup, but many of em don't sell the thing

Right? They just inflate the price across the board and create a holding pattern for the now-unsaleable high-demand item in question.

and what is this thing anyway, I mean I don't really think I need it

Banana Splits on 45

guy brings up three records that total $18 and says "can you do any better..."

i wanted to say: yes, actually, let's make it $20 and that way i do better.

but i just told him no. we can't do better. and it made me irrationally angry.

When people tell you they're dropping by in 10 minutes. A little more notice for fuck sake?

hah yeah i hate that, esp cos they often time it when you're in the shower so you're toweling off and hearing knocking and wondering why (if they texted yo uthat is)

LOL yeah. It's just bad etiquette

i say no. fuck it. i object to anyone who thinks it's acceptable to invade my personal space with fuck-all notice. if they made the decision without even bothering to check first, and my refusal puts them out, they can suck it up.

Yeah, that's pretty much my perspective. Thankfully, the people in my life respect my need for a heads up.

"Great, but you might need to wait on the porch for a while because I'll be masturbating."

i solve this particular dilemma by never having people over.

but what if they called to say they're 10 minutes away and you missed the call 11 minutes ago

just do what I do every time someone knocks on the front door if they're not selling Girl Scout cookies: turn off all the lights and pretend I'm not home

I have a fake conversation with two characters

"Look man, the moon is full, I should be changing - what's wrong?"
'Be patient - your transformation will be complete soon. All will be revealed.'

what if they say they will be over in 10 minutes and then show up 3 hours later without contacting you. that's worse, right?

Let's be real you're not busy, folks. And you could use the company.

Love yis an all but

https://media.giphy.com/media/BIZkwFtu2xDlS/giphy.gif

Last time we hosted Thanksgiving we told everyone to come over around 2pm. Sister-in-law said she'd probably arrive a little early in hopes of avoiding traffic. Sure, fine. Thanksgiving I jump out of bed in a panic when our doorbell is ringing at 7am. There's SIL, all smiles, reports the roads were clear. Wife later sees a text on her phone that had come through at 6am, "On my way!"

https://media.giphy.com/media/3o72EVJcAWOA1jaFLW/giphy.gif

*slam door closed*

Kushner, a onetime New York Democrat, and Bannon, a hard-right nationalist, have clashed as Kushner has told people that Bannon’s desire to deconstruct the government, is hurting the president.

That last comma is fucking infuriating.

You could almost make it right by adding a comma after "desire".

I wouldn't go for it, but it'd be better.

people who say "Happy Rex Manning Day"

when the person in front of you in the shop queue decides to sign up for the loyalty card and serving them takes not 10.34 seconds but a trillion centuries

"do you have a loyalty card?"
"no"
"would you like one?"
"no"
"are you sure?"
"yes"
"why?"
"because fuck off that's why"

"Did you know that by purchasing the $24.95 loyalty card, you'll save 10 percent off of today's purchase?"

"Which would be $1.60."

"But it's TEN PERCENT OFF!"

wtf who charges for a loyalty card???

NAME AND SHAME

I guess there are loyalty cards and membership cards. I was paraphrasing the spiel I have to hear whenever I try to buy something from BOOKS A' MILLION for some reason.

I always bat back with "I know you have to ask us, no thanks."

I find reacting this way works best

http://i1.kym-cdn.com/entries/icons/original/000/010/853/tumblr_lqx85siK031qdezf9o1_500.gif

Maybe one for the innocent drinks thread but my bank just sent me an email with the subject "tap tap tap" and the body "Tap tap tap" and nothing else.

(My webmail doesn't like HTML and there was no link that would get me a plain version of the text)

It's worse when it's a "confirm your address" email and contains no visible links. I had to forward one to my work email in order to read it last week. It had one line in it but was html so I couldn't see it.

As a sometime retail drone myself, I admire the empathy inherent in "I know you have to ask," but I don't always go that route.

Sometimes it's just "Yeah, no thanks, I already have way too many of that sort of thing," (wave wallet overstuffed with ostensible loyalty and understuffed with actual money).

Maybe one for the innocent drinks thread but my bank just sent me an email with the subject "tap tap tap" and the body "Tap tap tap" and nothing else.

(My webmail doesn't like HTML and there was no link that would get me a plain version of the text)

― koogs, Monday, April 10, 2017 10:02 AM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

does this dude work for your bank?

http://i.ytimg.com/vi/2-f-5JXZmg4/maxresdefault.jpg

"Did you know that by purchasing the $24.95 loyalty card, you'll save 10 percent off of today's purchase?"

"Which would be $1.60."

"But it's TEN PERCENT OFF!"

At one of my local legal w33d stores:

"sign up for our loyalty program and you can save 10%"
"so give you my name and information which you will now have when the Trump administration inevitably raids all the stores and shuts them down?"
"yes, but you could save 10%!"
"this gram costs $12, I would pay ten times that amount for you to NOT have my information on file"
"but don't you want to save 10%?"

xp no, it's this woman

https://frinkiac.com/gif/S11E20/653560/658760.gif?b64lines=VEFQQS1UQVBBLVRBUEEuCiBUQVBBLVRBUEEtVEFQQS4=

lol joygoat

I can't stand stores that assume everyone already has a "club card" or whatever they call it, and trying to sign up for one seems to involve calling a manager at home

i was behind someone at Winn-Dixie the other day who was signing up for one and it took about 5 minutes because the young lady was mumbling at an almost inaudible volume to every question, only to be asked to repeat herself, and then repeat her answer at the same inaudible volume.

ie "what's your name"
"uhburhburhburhrur"
"I'm sorry, I didn't get that, your name?"
"uhburhburhburhburhbur"