start a victory garden and ration your IRRATIONALLY ANGRY feelings, part 3

just do what I do every time someone knocks on the front door if they're not selling Girl Scout cookies: turn off all the lights and pretend I'm not home

I have a fake conversation with two characters

"Look man, the moon is full, I should be changing - what's wrong?"
'Be patient - your transformation will be complete soon. All will be revealed.'

what if they say they will be over in 10 minutes and then show up 3 hours later without contacting you. that's worse, right?

Let's be real you're not busy, folks. And you could use the company.

Love yis an all but

https://media.giphy.com/media/BIZkwFtu2xDlS/giphy.gif

Last time we hosted Thanksgiving we told everyone to come over around 2pm. Sister-in-law said she'd probably arrive a little early in hopes of avoiding traffic. Sure, fine. Thanksgiving I jump out of bed in a panic when our doorbell is ringing at 7am. There's SIL, all smiles, reports the roads were clear. Wife later sees a text on her phone that had come through at 6am, "On my way!"

https://media.giphy.com/media/3o72EVJcAWOA1jaFLW/giphy.gif

*slam door closed*

Kushner, a onetime New York Democrat, and Bannon, a hard-right nationalist, have clashed as Kushner has told people that Bannon’s desire to deconstruct the government, is hurting the president.

That last comma is fucking infuriating.

You could almost make it right by adding a comma after "desire".

I wouldn't go for it, but it'd be better.

people who say "Happy Rex Manning Day"

when the person in front of you in the shop queue decides to sign up for the loyalty card and serving them takes not 10.34 seconds but a trillion centuries

"do you have a loyalty card?"
"no"
"would you like one?"
"no"
"are you sure?"
"yes"
"why?"
"because fuck off that's why"

"Did you know that by purchasing the $24.95 loyalty card, you'll save 10 percent off of today's purchase?"

"Which would be $1.60."

"But it's TEN PERCENT OFF!"

wtf who charges for a loyalty card???

NAME AND SHAME

I guess there are loyalty cards and membership cards. I was paraphrasing the spiel I have to hear whenever I try to buy something from BOOKS A' MILLION for some reason.

I always bat back with "I know you have to ask us, no thanks."

I find reacting this way works best

http://i1.kym-cdn.com/entries/icons/original/000/010/853/tumblr_lqx85siK031qdezf9o1_500.gif

Maybe one for the innocent drinks thread but my bank just sent me an email with the subject "tap tap tap" and the body "Tap tap tap" and nothing else.

(My webmail doesn't like HTML and there was no link that would get me a plain version of the text)

It's worse when it's a "confirm your address" email and contains no visible links. I had to forward one to my work email in order to read it last week. It had one line in it but was html so I couldn't see it.

As a sometime retail drone myself, I admire the empathy inherent in "I know you have to ask," but I don't always go that route.

Sometimes it's just "Yeah, no thanks, I already have way too many of that sort of thing," (wave wallet overstuffed with ostensible loyalty and understuffed with actual money).

Maybe one for the innocent drinks thread but my bank just sent me an email with the subject "tap tap tap" and the body "Tap tap tap" and nothing else.

(My webmail doesn't like HTML and there was no link that would get me a plain version of the text)

― koogs, Monday, April 10, 2017 10:02 AM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

does this dude work for your bank?

http://i.ytimg.com/vi/2-f-5JXZmg4/maxresdefault.jpg

"Did you know that by purchasing the $24.95 loyalty card, you'll save 10 percent off of today's purchase?"

"Which would be $1.60."

"But it's TEN PERCENT OFF!"

At one of my local legal w33d stores:

"sign up for our loyalty program and you can save 10%"
"so give you my name and information which you will now have when the Trump administration inevitably raids all the stores and shuts them down?"
"yes, but you could save 10%!"
"this gram costs $12, I would pay ten times that amount for you to NOT have my information on file"
"but don't you want to save 10%?"

xp no, it's this woman

https://frinkiac.com/gif/S11E20/653560/658760.gif?b64lines=VEFQQS1UQVBBLVRBUEEuCiBUQVBBLVRBUEEtVEFQQS4=

lol joygoat

I can't stand stores that assume everyone already has a "club card" or whatever they call it, and trying to sign up for one seems to involve calling a manager at home

i was behind someone at Winn-Dixie the other day who was signing up for one and it took about 5 minutes because the young lady was mumbling at an almost inaudible volume to every question, only to be asked to repeat herself, and then repeat her answer at the same inaudible volume.

ie "what's your name"
"uhburhburhburhrur"
"I'm sorry, I didn't get that, your name?"
"uhburhburhburhburhbur"

grim reapah

rip burt_stanton

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=spefM2OjKp4

Looks like i just nearly completed a pair of jeans with a loose zip that doesn't catch.
Maybe better that I caught it at this point since it would have been even more painful if I found out later.
But now got to unpick the waistband i just put on. & step back a few stages.
oh bum.

if you really really don't want me to be your friend, put a photo of some dog as your avatar

double points if it's a maltese staring straight down the lens with its mouth open

people in china keep asking me what time it is here. maybe idk use the fucking same internet that you only just used to ask me that question?

so...you're in favor of universal time?

ha

urgent care clinics that have "pre-registration" online only to ask you to fill out an entire form with teh same info anyway when you show up.

Trying to get a spoonful of peanut butter out of an almost empty jar with a flimsy too-short plastic spoon

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_Y7j0gYIkfw

Anyway, Manischewitz makes me IR. Everything about them. Shitty products for a cornered market. Like, just try a little bit harder than just clumps of flavorless carbs and sugar, you shitheads.

Streit's all the way. Thankfully it's not too hard to find them in DC

Bought a couple cans of Manischewitz pistachio-orange macaroons at a local supermarket's going out of business sale (75% off), and I think they're not bad.

Having to work out how to repair rip in my leather car coat after catching it on a prong sticking out of a wire fence yesterday. Prong right next to entrance to community garden I need to cut through before long walk into town.

Long walk into town being necessary because of extended bus strike. Not sure how long that's going to drag on.
Realisation that I wasn't as beholden to buses as it felt so could have stayed out later in town if I wanted to.
The obstacle of the length of the walk being a daunting onerous task to be put off. People jog further but I don't want to carry shopping that far.

urgent care clinics that have "pre-registration" online only to ask you to fill out an entire form with teh same info anyway when you show up.

oh yeah, and any place that has an online reservation system that no employee ever looks at

there was one theatre here (now closed) that used Paypal for its ticketing system only instead of using Paypal as a merchant, basically it consisted of you just sending the ticket price to them manually. it was never monitored for how many seats were left to sell, was left on after showtime, etc, so you could wind up sending them money and show up only to find out there were no seats left.

I showed up one day saying I had a reservation and they didn't have my name and were like "oh right Paypal, haven't looked at that today"...

wtf that's insane

anger 100% rational and justified in that case

I presume you mean that that theatre closed after it was justifiably set on fire.